Carmy is definitely a sensual person you can tell by how it comes out in his art and how he plates food.
He didn’t draw Claire as sexy, though, when he was younger. Which was refreshing to me? Carmy isn’t interested in being gross about young women his own age he’s interested in wondering what Claire’s interiority is like.
Now, he drew erotic food drawings his whole life. As Donna flips through those notebooks in S5 it’s evident if you care just to dig even just a tiny bit deeper. He was thinking about sex at that point and projecting his feelings onto food.
We also see the same kind of sublimation in the drawings he makes for Syd of the chaos menu to make up for spending time with Claire.
In fact, it’s implied Syd reactivates this sensual part of him, not Claire. The show tells us Claire and Carmy’s relationship was empty and unsatisfying with both of them being fake (not honest/real) the whole time.
Meanwhile, Carmy is buying and giving Syd lavish presents based on her notebook she left behind, and making plates of food based on her outfits with different sauces trying to futilely find ways to impress her based on his past chef career.
Syd also dreams of food in the middle of the night (raspberries) and has an erotic panic dream by S4. Syd runs away from love (because it scares her, she associates it with loss and feeling alone like her dad is) and Carmy, meanwhile, is waiting on his second, third, fourth chance with her to get it right.
Which he finally does by treating her like a partner and a friend.
I don’t think all of this paints Carmy in a bad light for dating Claire, but it was never a serious relationship and Syd wasn’t going to let him get close to her right away.
It does get bad when he lets Syd influence him to call Claire his girlfriend just because he doesn’t want Syd to think he’s shitty.
Carmy tried it with Claire thinking that maybe sex and her knowing things about him would be enough for him to form a bond with her and it doesn’t work. He’s thinking of Syd when he’s with Claire.
Claire makes him feel like he’s on fire because he was feeling used and later admits he was using her, too, by trying to force himself to love her instead of being himself. People do this all the time IRL.
Which is different than just using someone for casual sex to me.
It’s a very interesting and different perspective on masculine sexuality.
And yes, he most certainly fucks up along the way by being competitive with Syd and not treating her like a partner and thinking he is the one that can get the stars.
Because that doesn’t build trust and intimacy. But he gets there.
Part of the reason he does is that Syd doesn’t compromise and he watches her every move in the restaurant.
She wants to see he’s going to put in the work first before she trusts him. She was smart and right to do it, too.
She knew he was asking her out on the Kasama date and asking her questions about her family to get to know her.
She was more concerned what the repercussions would be to her having him as a long-term partner to chase her dream and if he would mess that up for her.
He hasn’t met her dad by the end of S5 because he’s only just earned his way into her arms and his arms as a safe landing place for her.
But he’s clearly devoted to her at this point and they love each other.
Anyway, I think it’s pretty great.
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