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See that picture above? That’s a close up of my great grandmother’s immigration papers when she first came to the US back in the early 20th century. But my great grandma’s information isn’t the important part here. The important part is that line in the middle there about how they arrived in the country.
And how ‘stowaway’ is a legitimate, valid option to select.
So yeah. They absolutely just showed up, and that part of immigration history needs to be talked about a lot more.
REMINDER THAT TRAVEL VISAS AS WE KNOW THEM TODAY WERE INVENTED IN THE 1930S TO KEEP JEWISH REFUGEES OUT OF COUNTRIES THAT DID NOT WANT AN ‘INFLUX’ OF THEM, THEREBY FACILITATING THEIR GENOCIDE :)))))
read What is A Refugee for more history. Educate yourselves.
I hate when people ask me about my preference but I don’t understand their preference level. Like yes I kinda want Chinese food 10% more than I want a sandwich but if you want a sandwich like 40% more than Chinese food then I would say it’s totally reasonable we get sandwiches.
I actually have a preference BUT it’s mild and if my choice is going to cause you inconvenience then my preference is inconsequential, y’know?
I have actually ended relationships before because of the other person hewing closely to that last paragraph.
She was super cool, really interesting and pretty and I liked her a lot and she was into weird, unusual stories and films and games, and that kind of drew me in, and then inside the relationship she kind of disappeared. I'm a big girl, I'm enthusiastic and forthright and I hit on people I like and I tend to take action, and I think those were the things she liked about me?
In the relationship it turned into "what do YOU want to do?" I found it hard to grasp what her preferences were; like she would always find out what I wanted and then we'd do that, but that wasn't fulfilling and it didn't connect us. Maybe it's a middle kid thing, but I suspect it's not- I don't need to get my way all the time. Sometimes we SHOULD do what you want to do. You can't lie down and go "well your preferences are stronger so we'll do what you want" because, and I say this from experience, it drowns the connection between the two of you.
What's the difference between these conversations:
"hey, what do you want for lunch?"
"I was thinking sandwiches, but I'm not super bothered. You?"
"I think I could really go for Chinese. Is that cool with you?"
"yeah, sure!
And
"hey, I was thinking Chinese for lunch, I got a hankering. Is that cool with you?"
"I had sandwiches in mind but Chinese sounds great!"
... there's no real difference. The same information gets shared both times. The Chinese-desirer knows that the sandwich-desirer had a soft preference for sandwiches each time, and that this time they're getting their own preference. The bad thing is this:
"hey, I was thinking Chinese for lunch, I got a hankering. Is that cool with you?"
"yeah, sure!" (unspoken: they clearly want Chinese more than I want sandwiches)
Where desires are not communicated even when they're soft.
This was a ramble! My point: get comfortable expressing soft desire, even if you are happy to compromise. What you want matters. It doesn't inconvenience me for you to sometimes get what YOU want, because if you never get what you want how do I know you want me?
today was the day we finalized the migration of essential software at work from some old and busted shit that was ready to die at any time, to the new cloud version of the same software that we are no longer responsible for maintaining. which is good because no one was actually maintaining ours. it's just been slowly crufting into unusability for a decade. so anyway they set aside an hour for a teams meeting where they'd walk us through the different interface and how to go through normal processes.
"it's not that big a change," they said. "it's all the same stuff, it just looks a little different," they said.
they did not account for the fact that the primary user of this software is someone who doesn't actually know how it works or what it's doing. they learned how to do their job entirely through rote memorization. they know which buttons they are supposed to press in which order, and that is the full extent of what they know. they also did not account for the fact that this person's processes were learned thirdhand from other people who were not using this software normally to begin with.
it's like. imagine if someone had only ever used tumblr in the app. and you try to get them to use it in a desktop browser, but they cannot figure out how to post. and you go through explaining where the button is and how to format text and add tags, even though you could have sworn it was all the same in the app. but then they're like, "okay, but what's the phone number" and you're like "what" and they're like "the phone number to call to make a post?" and it turns out somehow they still had the ability to post by calling a phone number, and every time they posted on the app they called the post in first and then edited the audio post to transcribe it into text before screenshotting the text for a photo post. and nothing you can say to them will make them understand that none of that is necessary or correct. they shouldn't have even been able to do some of that. they can just type into the post box now, like a civilized person. "okay," they say, "but what is the phone number, though? because when i made my account my friend gave me this checklist and the first thing on it is to call the number."
so anyway we were on that teams call for almost three hours and they still don't have a handle on the new software
details have been changed but i want you to imagine that this software is used in part to record payments and send out updated invoices. in this software there is a special process to send invoices to collections. generally, you use special filters to determine what does and does not get sent off to collections. but this person kept asking that poor trainer to run the collections wizard on all invoices. every one of them. unpaid. paid. brand new. all of them. and the trainer is like. i am not doing that actually. and the person keeps insisting. "i need the report" they keep saying. "this isn't a report" the trainer keeps explaining.
as far as anyone can tell, decades ago, the person who first worked with this software added a custom report that prints before you can run the collections wizard. they would go through that report manually highlighting every invoice going to collections, with a highlighter, because they didn't trust the software. because this was old software without any kind of autosave functionality, they could just abort the collections wizard after they got the report, before doing it again and manually flagging the invoices they highlighted. everyone using this software since then has just. done that. assuming it was necessary for some reason.
"please," the trainer kept saying. "can you tell me what the report is called. what is the report. can you scan the report and send it to me. we can just run the report. we don't need to run the collections wizard. we actually specifically should not. there is no report here. we would need to add that in if you want that. but you won't need to run this wizard to get that report. you can just get it. the report. without doing this."
"it's fine," they kept saying. "i can show you the report. just hit okay on the wizard and it should pop up."
some of you have GOT to get comfortable with lying and situational morality and i'm not kidding
A reminder to anyone reading this that so-called Australia is stolen Aboriginal and Torres Strait Islander lands, that we never ceded sovereignty to our colonizers. So called Australia is the only "Commonwealth" country that has never had a treaty with First Nations peoples. Only two years ago the government held a referendum to determine whether we, the sovereign peoples of this land, should have an advisory body in government and the nation voted no. So called Australia is the only nation that celebrates on January 26, the anniversary of the beginning of the attempted colonisation and genocide of its First Nations peoples. If you are not Aboriginal or Torres Strait Islander and you're living in so called Australia, you benefit directly from our colonisation and it's your duty to stand with us. Aboriginal and Torres Strait Islander people are the most incarcerated people by percentage on Earth. We are also the oldest living, continuous culture known to humankind. For 100s of 1000s of years our Mob stood beautiful, Blak and deadly and we will continue to do so because this always was and always will be our lands. We are still here.
I'm glad youse appreciated my post about Aboriginal and Torres Strait Islander peoples but friends, jsyk "aboriginies" and "abo" are slurs and when writing about Aboriginal peoples you always need to capitalise the "A" because we are a people/culture/ethnicity. Please do not tag or comment my posts about Aboriginal peoples with slurs and show us respect. Thank you ❤️