prepare to be disappointed

[amrv-5]

Does anyone know what to do about the temperature and also the prices

[meanbuddhist]

*turns my attention inwards* mmmmm. no *turns my attention back outwards* oh god

[knowyournewmeme]

You: *panicking, running for your life through my labyrinth space station*

Me, over intercoms: You have terf bangs

[bornagainchristianbaby]

[storm-of-feathers]

a severe thunderstorm warning that doesnt follow through is worse than orgasm denial

[storm-of-feathers]

tumblr is great bc its like a diary where I can take other peoples diary entries and glue them into my own diary

[e-seal-deactivated20210319]

feel like inventing some guys

[e-seal-deactivated20210319]

guy who puts his head underneath the sneeze guard at the buffet

[e-seal-deactivated20210319]

guy who tips the bus driver a 20$

[e-seal-deactivated20210319]

guy who can swim in the deep end of the pool but pretends they can’t

[e-seal-deactivated20210319]

guy who can’t remember their password and forgot their glasses so they ask you to read it off the sticky note they wrote it down on

[e-seal-deactivated20210319]

guy whose kinda sexy from every angle except for one

[biff-donderglutes]

can i make a guy too

[e-seal-deactivated20210319]

yeah feel free, this is an open source guy post

[biff-donderglutes]

guy that asks permission to make guys

[valtsv]

kitten i'll be honest daddy needs to learn how to have fun making art again or he's going to kill himself

[pansyfemme]

one moment ☝️ *pauses the blowjob to start violently coughing up blood*

[bobdylanyaoi]

what i feel like when i reply to someone’s post

[kosmogrl]

I can’t overshare because that would be very humiliating but everyone else should overshare because I like to know everything

[ru1n3r]

i feel like im constantly taking damage

[fosters-shitpost]

-1hp -1hp -1hp -1hp

[cutecipher]

basketball players fight over the basketball because they are hypnotized before each game to believe it is their egg

[aboutoriginality]

[frontmansdefender]

[simply-a-dream]

“don’t take it personally” how would you like me to take it then? professionally? romantically? academically?

[creative-anchorage]

[suriandtaal]

[dailycatsblog]

[maxknightley]

being a jack of all trades is dope as fuck honestly. it's like I'm doing crop rotation inside my own brain