Look at him, silly little guy with his big sad brown eyes, absolutely no thoughts in his head, I sure hope nothing bad happens to him in the next fifteen minutes
Synopsis: Cyno and Traveller came across some letters during an expedition and Al Haitham basically annoyed about the contents of it.
CW: Slight Angst, Death of Characters, Mention of suicide
HC: Reader is gender-neutral, Reader does not have a vision, Al Haitham was King Deshret in the past
Characters: Al Haitham, Kaveh, Nahida, King Deshret, Mentions of Goddess of Flowers, Cyno and Traveller.
Note: Does anyone else know about the reincarnation theory? I think it's pretty intriguing and I am definitely going to use that as a plot point to make angst. It's what the people deserve. I decided to change things up a bit and put in a small description of what's to come. There is a lot of reading in this one, like a slow burn kind of feeling because I love putting lore into reader x character stories. Also this is after Nahida's archon and story quest, so there will be some spoilers. Enjoy.
The current feeling Al Haitham was experiencing was irritation and he was certain it was because of the papers that lay orderly on the table in front of him. It was a series of letters, extracted from one of King Deshret's reserves. They were in envelopes completely sealed with only slight discoloration on the paper. Many would think the contents of these letters would be extraordinary, especially since they were so well preserved, but to Al Haitham's disappointment, it was far from a discovery.
They were love letters and minimal ones at that. One requested a walk alongside the desert city and another insisted to go to the festival held by the Goddess of Flowers for Sumeru's Archon. Al Haitham sighed, looking through each letter carefully. At first, he thought maybe it was a secret code that he needed to decipher, but to his dismay, it was not. Just ordinary love letters, which embarrassingly seemed to be written by the King himself.
"Of course, Cyno would be the one to give me something so useless." He mumbled to himself, recounting the time when Cyno and the Traveller had dropped by his house at 3 in the morning just to hand him the letters. They were lucky he was reading at the time, otherwise, they would have been standing on the front porch until sunrise. However, now he regrets it, realizing he wasted hours of his night on this. He shouldn't have stayed up.
Almost mockingly, Kaveh entered the room, yawning as if he was just woken up from the best sleep known to man. The man yelped, seeing Al Haitham awake sitting on the living room sofa with papers laid out everywhere and a fierce look in his eyes. "You know it wouldn't hurt to make some noise when you're working, I thought you were a criminal." Al Haitham huffed, not bothered to retort at the moment. This intrigued Kaveh, who decided to prod more.
"What got you so grumpy on such a lovely day?" He asked, walking towards the papers to take a peak. Al Haitham leaned back in his chair with another huff. "Letters found in of one King Deshret's reserves. I made the mistake of thinking it might be useful." Kaveh picked one up, reading the texts and irking an eyebrow. "And you're certain it's his?"
Al Haitham gave Kaveh an annoyed glare. "Of course, the handwriting matches almost all his other official documents." Kaveh hummed, a confused look on his face, he turned the paper around, trying to look for something. Now it was Al Haitham's turn to raise an eyebrow. "What?"
"Is there no indication as to who it was written for?" Al Haitham sat up a bit. "What?" "Well, the letters had to be written for someone, but looking at it, it seems he never sent out these letters. Not only that, he wrote a bunch of them, no signs they were opened until now." Kaveh wasn't wrong, there was no sign of an address or the recipient addressed onto the letters.
Kaveh put down the letter, stretching himself before making his way to the kitchen. "What a shame, poor guy never got to tell that person how he felt. " The irritated feeling in Al Haitham's chest began to grow and for once his usual poker face was gifted with a frown.
He didn't like not knowing something.
---
Al Haitham didn't know what he was achieving by doing this. Requesting an audience with the archon just to find out about a lost king's love life? It sounded embarrassing even to say. However he needed to scratch the itch that was in his brain, he needed to know why King Deshret had never sent out these letters. Or even if he did send one, where he could find a reply to the letter. Al Haitham didn't like doing useless things, but at the same time, he disliked not knowing something in its entirety.
Nahida had greeted him, to which he responded with a bow. After giving a detailed summary of the situation, he held out the letters to Nahida. She took them, awing at the number of letters. "Wow, that's quite a lot." He nodded. "Yeah, I'm certain he must have at least sent one. Maybe he even got a response. But I cannot find anything else."
"Have you asked the people who gave you the letters in the first place whether there was anymore?" Al Haitham nodded. He requested the Traveller to once more check the ruins for any signs of letters which the Traveller kindly obliged to. However, there was nothing it seemed. Al Haitham didn't like that outcome.
Nahida nodded, also intrigued. "I do not remember anything of that sort, but I can check the Iriminsul tree's records to see if there is anything related to this." She said, gesturing to the overflowing of letters in her hand. "I would appreciate that."
Al Haitham stood to a side waiting with crossed arms. It only took a couple of minutes but Al Haitham could feel his patience wearing out. Why was he so obsessed with finding out? He wasn't sure and somehow that irked him more. He wanted to just get this over with.
"Found something." Al Haitham could feel his entire body react, alerting himself to carefully listen to the results. Nahida displayed a glimpse of a memory, it almost looked like a puppet show. She began to speak as the memory played out. "King Dhesret had sent multiple letters over his lifetime so it was a bit difficult to go through, but there was one particular instance where he went to deliver a letter. This was the only record that stood out to me."
The puppet show depicted King Dhesret, making his way through the desert until he reached a city, extending his hand with a letter in it to an individual. The individual did not have any distinguishing features, and before anything else could happen the memory faded into Nahida's palm. Nahida extended her hand, which Al Haitham accepted.
She placed a little orb in his palm before backing away. "I found records of the location. I put it into that form so it's easier for you to access. You might find the letter there." Al Haitham looked down at his hand, before gripping the orb tightly between his fingers and palm. "I'm thankful for your assistance my archon."
Nahida smiled at him. "I hope you find what you are looking for. Good luck."
---
It was no surprise the location was that of an abandoned city in the desert. Houses were broken down and sand piled inside, the definition of a ghost town. Al Haitham frowned, it would have been annoying if thieves had come around and taken any records here. He just hoped that the letter wasn't valuable enough to be taken.
He followed the instructions displayed by the orb, following into a small brick house, almost the same as any of the other houses. He looked around. It was a pretty humble house, maybe a family of three could have lived here in the past. He was certain the place was given to the ancestors to the individual who received the letter because even when the house was abandoned, it looked like it was lived in pretty well.
Children's drawings were scattered on the walls. There were marble sets and broken game pieces in the sand. Three beds with no mattress and chair pieces were broken and scattered around the place. A hearth in the center of the room was covered in soot due to the number of times it had been used.
However no sign of where a letter could be placed. There were no cupboards or chests around intact. No scrolls or hidden compartments he could see. "This whole trip has been a waste of my time." Al Haitham grumbled to himself. The usual him would have just made his way out, but to his surprise, he began to dig. He dug out corners, near the hearth, beside the games. There must have been something. He didn't want this stupid trip to be a waste.
He finally dug beneath one of the bed frames, which lead to the discovery of a box. A small tin box that was used to hold cookies or treats for children. Al Haitham sat down on the sand, opening the tin to see what was inside.
He found a letter. The name written on the front seemed familiar to him, almost on the tip of his tongue, but it wasn't a name found in any of his research. He took out the letter, gently opening it, trying not to damage the envelope. He could tell the letter was taken care of and he didn't want to deal with any of the scholars lecturing him for damaging historical documents.
The letter inside had seen better days. It was discolored and wrinkled. It was as if someone had crumpled the paper and then tried to straighten it out. The fold between the pages was forming tears and the paper was warped. Al Haitham tried his best to gently open it to read its contents.
---
"My dear friend,
I apologize for the sudden letter, I couldn't bare to tell you this by myself so I hope you will forgive me someday.
I cannot spare you any details of what is going on, but I want to inform you that I will no longer be present in the world by the time you opened and read this letter.
I have done something that caused the lives of my friends and my citizens and I need to make things right.
Thank you for everything you have done for me and I hope you live a happy life with your family.
Your friend,
Deshret."
---
It was a suicide note. Contrasting to any of the letters he had written, this wasn't a love letter. King Dhesret wrote a final letter to this person as a friend, completely hiding away the fact he was ever in love with them.
Al Haitham wondered what he was feeling right now. Rage? Disappointment? He wasn't sure, but either way, he had to drop the letter on the ground before he decided it needed to be ripped apart.
He couldn't believe he had spent almost an entire two days trying to uncover this, only to find out the letter that the king had ever sent was a suicide note to the so-called person he loved. At this point, he decided he was done. Gathering the letter back into its box, he began to make his way back home.
---
The last thing he needed to do was get rid of the letters, meaning give them to the Akademiya Archives for safekeeping. He was satisfied, finally being able to get rid of these letters.
He made his way into the library and saw someone near the desk, head down, reading papers scattered around. You were so distracted with what you were reading you didn't even see him enter and hover over you.
A slight cough made you jolt, making you look up at Al Haitham. He had a poker face on and you could feel your face brighten up. You were not prepared to take off the current acting grand sage. You began to speak, trying not to jumble your words.
"OH! Sir! How can I assist you?" You laugh sheepishly, trying to hide your sudden shyness. He placed the letters on the desk without acknowledging your awkwardness. "We found some records written by King Dhesret. I do not think it's important but the Akademiya would say otherwise." You awe at the letters. You quickly put away the research papers you were reading and began to open the letters one by one, displaying them on your desk.
"Oh my! They are love letters!" You could feel yourself blush, you wondered if King Dhesret might have been rolling in his grave knowing these would be permanently displayed in Sumeru's history after this. "If that is all you need I'll be on my way." Al Haitham began to turn around. "Oh no please wait!" Al Haitham turned back and you felt yourself shrink as he scowled at you.
"I'm sorry but, I will still need you around. Since you're the one who brought these in I will need to ask questions to prepare the article when presenting these in the archives. A description of what they were and what was discovered from them. I'll try my best to make it quick." You wondered if you had spoken so fast ever in your life. However, you knew Al Haitham was not a patient man when he had to do things he deemed unimportant.
Al Haitham on the other end was tired. He had not slept properly in days trying to piece why the letters were irritating him so much. Even after discovering the final letter, he still felt like he had failed a mission. He wanted to get rid of the letters and get over it but instead, he sighed, dragging a chair near to your desk and sitting across from you. He watched your face of worry turned into a smile.
As he sat closer to you, his eyes caught on the nameplate on your desk. Your name matched the name of the person King Dhesret had sent the letter. No wonder he thought it sounded familiar.
"Is something wrong Acting Grand Sage?" You ask. Al Haitham shook his head. "No. Also, don't call me that. Al Haitham is fine." He crossed his arms and you responded with a meek nod, before going back into the letters.
"Right, so let me ask some questions. Any noticeable things you discovered when researching these letters?" Al Haitham shook his head once more, he felt like he would end up doing this the entire talk. "No, only the fact that King Dhesret might have been a coward it seems." You note everything he said down.
As he continued to shake his head and answer your questions, he watched your eyebrows furrow, almost in frustration. He looked amused, wondering if he was pissing you off. You finally broke, when Al Haitham decided to diss the King once more.
"I'm sorry if I might be going out of the line here, but, do you perhaps think this discovery was a waste of time?" Al Haitham scoffed, he usually kept a poker face, barely showing any emotion in his words, but he couldn't keep up appearances when he was this tired. However, it didn't change his honesty. "Yes." "Can you elaborate on why?"
Al Haitham raised an eyebrow. "The letters don't provide much for the history-" You cut him off, which did surprise him a bit. "I beg to differ. The letters themselves don't help the general history of his rule as the King of the desert, but it does give insight into him as a person."
Al Haitham wanted to say something, but you continued to speak and for once, Al Haitham wanted to listen. "For starters, all these letters are considered love letters but the requests he suggests are so, simple, almost as if he was trying not to make it obvious. It's clear to us since he never made requests like this via letter before. He was known for being confident and rebellious. But the person writing these letters was too shy to say it out loud." You point out certain lines in the letters.
"Next, almost everyone was certain he was only enamored by the Goddess of flowers, especially since they ruled together. But then we see the letters, addressing someone who isn't her. Some of the letters even suggest that she might have encouraged him to write it out. Such as the flower petals and their imprints you can see on some of the letters. " Al Haitham watched you trace over the patterns on the letter. He assumed they were just slight discoloration, but closely looking into them he could see the flower petals of a padisarah flower carefully imprinting the letter.
"Finally, how well the letters were preserved. Something must have held him back from sending them, but it seemed that he always planned on sending them at one point. He could have easily thrown or torn these apart, but something about these letters was important to him. It expressed something that he wanted to say so badly but something prevented him from saying it." He watched as you pulled out the letter King Dhesret actually had the courage to send.
He watched as you gently opened it, a slight smile falling on your face. You catch yourself before turning a shade of red. "Sorry, I just noticed how our names matched, it almost felt like King Dhesret sent this letter to me." You giggled and Al Haitham frowned, the thought kind of annoyed him.
You cough, noticing his frown, shifting your eyes away back to the letter. "Anyway, this letter proves why he never sent the rest. The recipient had a family. Maybe he was too late, or maybe they didn't have a choice but to start one. This was during a time forbidden knowledge was affecting the citizens. They both couldn't make time for each other because of it, leading them to live different lives."
Al Haitham watched you look down at the letter, a bittersweet smile on your face. He didn't enjoy how that looked on your face. You began to speak once more. "Are you familiar with the term 'Right person, wrong time'? It's a pretty common trope in romance novels." "I don't read romance novels." You let out a light laugh and Al Haitham had to catch himself from thinking that the laugh suited you more than the sad smile on your face.
"Of course you wouldn't, I am not surprised. However, I think this is a clear example of it. It's very clear that the recipient cared for him to such an extent." Al Haitham cocked his head to a side, a gesture implying 'Why do you think so?'. You continued. "The state of this letter pretty much shows it. First, it was crumpled, probably out of anger. But then it was straightened out carefully and placed into the envelope. You could also see how much it was folded, almost as if they kept it around and opened it constantly over time. The warped paper also indicates that it had got wet, probably from tears."
Al Haitham watched as you carefully point out all of it. He wondered why he felt so jealous of a stupid letter, the way you held it so gently, almost as if the letter was written for you. He hated it.
"They probably felt the same way or something similar. Too bad he never sent the rest. Something could have happened if he did." You sighed, folding the letter gently before placing it back in its envelope.
You finally caught yourself, realizing how much you had been rambling at the time. You felt yourself turn red once more. "But you already knew about all this! I'm so sorry for going on a tangent!" You mumble out, trying to hide your embarrassment.
Al Haitham sighed, making you feel like you were hit in the face by a bat. The grand sage was known for being ruthless and you didn't want to be on his bad side. Imagine your surprise when he finally decided to speak up. "No, it's fine. I suppose I was not thinking thoroughly. I apologize for downplaying this discovery." You blink in shock.
Al Haitham stood up. "I suppose we are done now?" You nod, tongue-tied and unsure how to respond. "Then I'll be on my way. Thank you for taking care of that." He began to turn and make his way to the door. He stopped near the entrance, turning once more to face you, who still haven't taken your eyes off him. "I might come around another time. It seems your insight into certain topics has intrigued me." With that, he made his way out of the door.
---
On the way out, he met Nahida, who set at the railings of the stairs, looking out at the view. He didn't know why, but he made his way toward her.
"Did you find what you needed?" She asked, acknowledging him approaching her. "It seems so."
"Are you satisfied?" He thought about it. "No not really. I still think he was a coward. " Nahida let out a laugh.
"Do you want to change that?" Al Haitham raised an eyebrow, confused about what that could mean. "I'm sorry my archon, I don't seem to understand."
"If perhaps you were King Dhesret, would you want to change how it ended?" She asked, rephrasing her question. Al Haitham still didn't understand what she could be implying but decided to answer anyway. " I would be nothing like him."
Nahida hummed in approval. "I see I see. I wish you good luck then." She looked at him and smiled. She dropped down next to him and waved him goodbye. Al Haitham gave a bow, before watching her enter the Akademiya Archives, where you were currently working.
Maybe it was the sleep deprivation but he thought about how happy you looked when you saw the letter had your name and how much it irritated him. Al Haitham didn't know why, but he felt like writing a letter. He shook his head, making his way back to his house.
He just hoped whatever he did write didn't end up in the archives in the future. Especially since he planned on inviting you out very soon. He picked out some flowers on the way, hoping you would like them. It seems like he wasn't going to get any sleep anytime soon.
- Al-Haitham is known to dislike authority figures, so he wouldn’t dislike you
- but… the amount of extra paperwork you accidentally cause… yeah, he doesn’t like you either
- The first time you two actually meet would be by complete accident when you aren’t in your mask
- And somehow- somehow- he knows who you are
————————————
Sitting in a cafe after a long night out is normal for you, the nice rays of the morning sun gleaming into the small cafe windows is very nice. Your warm drink of choice in your hands, heating the palms up just enough for a comforting feeling to enrapture you to stay.
Ad you take a sip, the door opens with a small chime to notify the workers of the person’s arrival. You don’t glance over at first, it is 5am, many scholars are awake for their researching or lectures.
However the voice of Al-Haitham takes you by surprise.
“One black coffee, small.”
You’re not surprised by the order, but the man being here of all places is quite odd. You wouldn’t say you stalked the guy, but when you’re out on your adventures you can’t help but to people watch along with your crime fighting. He’s one of the people who actually stays up late at night- and him being here this early in the morning isn’t usual.
When you look over your shoulder just for a quick glance, he’s already looking at you. A shiver runs down your spine from the intense glare he has- the eye bags don’t make it any better…
Finally his coffee has arrived, and you pray he’ll leave right after. His coffee is in a to-go cup after all.
Your prayers aren’t answered, however, and he moves to sit right across from you at the table you’ve chosen. He places the cup down and sighs.
“You’re quite the headache,” He mumbles under his breath. You’re not sure what he means by this, but you still start to sweat- if this buff ass guy is as mean as he seems, you might get your ass beat.
“oh.. uh- heh… sorry about that..?” You somehow mutter out, rubbing the back of your neck and looking away while taking another sip of your drink.
Al-Haitham looks at you, dead in the eyes. Before he looks down at your chest, then back up at you- honestly it’s a little rude, no matter what gender you are.
“Your costume is showing.”
Oh.
Quickly you look down with wide eyes, before noticing that it is, in fact, well hidden behind your button up shirt. You look back at him with a confused expression, and he just smirks at you.
Well… shit.
“I- uh… I don’t know what you’re talking about…” You try to come up with some excuse, however it’s an awkward execution that clearly doesn’t help your predicament.
All he does is nod, “Of course you don’t, why wouldn’t you.”
Another awkward silence forms between you two, you’re sweating, he’s staring at you intently. It’s like this for a couple of minutes, the only break you get is when he takes a drink of his coffee.
Finally- finally- he finishes the cup, the empty sound of it hitting the table while he stands up fills your stomach with relief. Al-Haitham then moves over to your side of the table and places down a folder, the title is “Spiderman?”
When you open it, it’s a shit ton of paperwork and pictures of you, either in action, or simply helping out a citizen with crossing the stream. You look up at him with a confused look, before he moves a few papers out of the way to show a picture of you taking your mask off.
You get bright red as you shove your hands over the picture, the glimpse you saw was enough, your face clear as day.
“I won’t tell anyone, only people who know is me and the photographer.”
Once again, the confused glare stares back at him. If he wanted to keep it a secret, why show you the picture in the first place?
“I won’t tell anyone… if you help with the paperwork.”
Ah, there it is.
You groan, slumping over the table as you sigh. It’s understandable, and from the skimming of the papers, it’s mostly vigilante and property damage reports. But still, paperwork isn’t really the best thing to waste your time on.
However, you’d rather be forced to do an office job than have a bounty over your head thanks to the Grand Acting Sage accidentally leaking that photo.
“…When do I start?”
Al-Haitham smiles at your words, before checking his watch, “About thirty minutes. My office is on the fifth floor.”
And just as abruptly as he sat down, he leaves. You’re left scrambling to finish your drink, throwing a fair tip on the table, and rushing out of the doors right behind him.
౨ৎ CW(s): gn! reader, beast!au, angst/romance, kinda short
౨ৎ SYNOPSIS: in which dazai osamu's timeless love for you knows no bounds, even in another life.
inspired by: timeless and enchanted by taylor swift !
it was late afternoon when dazai passes by an antique shop down the block that didn't have customers, but a voice in the back of his head urges him to stop on his tracks and check it out.
drawn towards the antique shop, dazai feels his own feet move and his hands push the door open, causing the bell at the top of the frame to chime as he steps inside.
there was an elderly lady at the cashier and maintaining the antique shop, but when she saw the man clothed in black with a bandaged eye, her face wrinkled into a warm smile as she welcomed him inside. he could see how the old lady was taken aback by his look, yet she remained kind as he was a customer.
dazai merely nods curtly in response to the old lady's greeting before wandering about the shop, unfazed of the old lady's watchful gaze.
he couldn't care less about the trinkets, keychains, and accessories in here, but then his gaze fell upon an open box of pictures, and curiosity gets the best of him when he notices the sign above the open box of old pictures, seeing how each only sold for a couple of cents.
dazai quietly finds himself reaching into the box and seeing that it contains photographs, which appear to have been taken years ago given that they are all in black and white.
he discovers an image of a couple holding hands at the porch of their first home, and then another, but this time it was a photograph of high school sweethearts, laughing and holding hands, looking so happy with genuine smiles.
all of the photographs he sees next show a kind of love that only comes along once in a lifetime.
dazai takes a long breath, his hand reflexively grasping the pictures a little too tightly, causing them to crumple slightly.
normally, something as sentimental as these photographs wouldn't make him feel anything, but when he looked at them again, he saw a different person.
dazai saw you and him instead, and he wished it had really been the two of you instead.
that's when his thoughts turned to you, and you filled his entire mind with questions after questions.
would you have looked at him in the same way just like the lover to his beloved in the photos did? even in the middle of a crowded street?
perhaps in another life, dazai muses as he puts the images back in the box—just not in this one, sadly.
dazai keeps wandering around the antique shop, discovering new things like a stack of books covered with cobwebs.
he takes one in his hand and silently flips through the pages, which are already brown and worn from time, and it doesn't take him long to realize it's a diary. but as he reads the sentences in quiet, he finds himself scoffing, his gaze narrowing as he picks up on the story in it.
what was this antique shop doing to him?
was it to rub in his face of what could've been?
it was just cruel and twisted.
the bell by the door opening brings him back to reality as he feels the heavy burden on his shoulders again. dazai sighs to himself as puts the cobweb-covered book back and turns his head, ready to leave now that there is another customer in the antique shop besides him.
but dazai is unable to move and stands still, completely surprised, by what he sees.
"oh, my. why haven't i come here before?" you exclaim in a soft gasp of wonder as you look around the antique shop with curiosity.
it was you in all your grandeur, looking the same as you did in another life, still smiling warmly, and he is amazed and falls in love all over again at the sight of you in front of him.
the story breaks down his mind and body as it seems to halt when you walk into the shop, catching his eyes and finding the story starting when your eyes finally meet his and you speak.
"hello," your voice was as soothing and kind as it had always been, and it sounded like music to his ears, and dazai had missed it so much.
he notices you tilting your head to the side and hears your eyes ask, "have we met before?"' and felt the want to scream yes.
to tell you how long he had been waiting and longing to see you again in this life, but dazai knows he can't as his breath hitches.
"s-sir? are you okay?" your concerned voice surprises him. you were much closer now.
"huh?" was all he could utter in confusion.
dazai sees you rummaging through your pockets and pulls out a handkerchief, only for you to hand it to him before pointing it out to him, "sir, you're crying."
oh.
he never cries. he never did in his lifetime, but it appears that even in this world, you still hold his heart for him to do so. as dazai blinks, he notices how fuzzy his vision has become as a result of his tears filing his eyes and dampening the bandages covering his left eye.
he shakily reaches for your handkerchief, tears welling up in his eyes as his fingers grazes your warm skin. even your touch in this world was the same as it had always been.
"i'm sorry.. thank you.." dazai exhales, his sullen expression suddenly hidden by an exasperated fit of laughter as he wipes his tears with your handkerchief.
as he finishes, he hands you back your handkerchief, which you accept with a smile.
"it's no problem, but are you sure you're okay, sir?" you ask again, your face concerned.
"hmm? oh, yes. i'm fine, love," dazai laughs and shrugs it off as nothing, "i was going through old photographs and stuff here in this shop and got a bit sentimental, and then i saw you."
"i see, i see," you say softly with a small giggle, shaking your head, "well, i'm sorry to bother you, sir. i'm glad you're okay."
"no need for that, dear. i should be the one apologizing for worrying you," dazai insists with a smile, a genuine smile as he waves his hand.
he sees you nod and smile again before you excuse yourself and move past him to look around the store.
as dazai turns his head over his shoulder, he finds you conversing with the kind old lady of the antique shop while digging through the things you found interesting and charming.
as he recalls the images and book he read over earlier while staring at you at this instance, memories flood his head.
dazai had found you again, and even in another life, you made his head swirl, and all he could think of was how you could have still been his.
if only the story had gone back to the beginning page instead of where it was about to conclude. despite his thoughts echoing your name and filled his mind with memories of you from the other realities, it was already too late.
the pieces were already in place, and how could he take this away from you? to see you happy and safe, thriving in a life where you were just a regular citizen, not a member of an armed detective agency or anything..
and he couldn't stop thinking about one thing;
the regret of not being able to share and live this life with you.
where you could have been his,
where you and dazai could have been the ones in the old photographs he saw earlier,
and where you could have said you two were truly timeless.
nonetheless, dazai is grateful for meeting you again and falling in love with you. he has always loved you in every universe after all.
even in this separate life, even though fate has torn you two apart in this reality.
"we would've been timeless," dazai murmurs softly to himself before leaving the antique shop, his head and heart laden with grief.
=͟͟͞♡˖ ° niki says ! ༉‧₊˚.
sigh, the kind of things miss taylor swift makes me write with the songs she wrote 💔 oh, and i am also dedicating this beast! dazai fic to @anqelically and @ruru-kiss !! (already hugging you both in advance because 🫂🥲)
Can I request dazai confessing his feelings to reader and reader doesn’t believe he’s being serious? Thank you 💕
𝐒𝐄𝐑𝐈𝐎𝐔𝐒𝐋𝐘. - 𝐃. 𝐎𝐒𝐀𝐌𝐔
a/n : ofc anon! tysm for your request! <3 i apologise if it isn’t good writing. this is my first full fic but I really do hope you enjoy it 💗
genre : fluff
warnings : none
wc : 1,542
— 𝐈f you had to describe Dazai Osamu with a few words, it certainly wouldn’t be earnest. He just wasn’t known to be that serious kind of man, you knew that of course. You’ve been working alongside him for as long as you can remember and all you seemed to get from him was just incompetent behaviour. You have never once in your whole life of working at the agency seen Dazai be or at least try to be serious, at least not with you. His way of communicating with you would always end up with him initiating a flirty gesture or phrasing something poetic about your ethereal beauty. Although you didn’t mind it, a part of you wondered if what he was saying was actually true.
“You’re oblivious, you know that right?” Ranpo said, eating away and interrupting your rant about the whole situation between you and Dazai. “He is in love with you.” He continued. “He may not act serious but trust me, the eyes don’t lie.” He finished. He wasn’t wrong, he’s Ranpo he was never wrong and the way Dazai looked at you when you weren’t was truly something. But still, you just couldn’t believe it, you couldn’t believe Dazai would actually be serious about loving you, it was all just fun and games after all, right?
It was quite a lonely night for you back at the agency. Everyone had clocked out for the night and you were filling in some leftover paperwork that had to be done for the week and then you’d be finished. As you were too zoned in on the sound of your own pencil scribbling the paper you didn’t seem to hear the tiny creak of the door behind you slowly opening up. Dazai slowly peaked through the door, spotting you and entered your working space, being gentle with his movements as to not get your attention just yet. He slowly stepped forward— practically tiptoeing his way towards you from behind, eventually placing his hands on your shoulder before whispering. “Whatcha doing, Bella?~”. It took a quick second for your heart to skip a beat when you heard that specific nickname only one person called you. You snapped out of your focus before swiftly turning around to him with a sigh of relief when you can confirm it’s just him. “Dazai..” You let out another exhale of relief. “You scared me there.” You added on with a small smile to your face, a pink hue slightly tinting your cheeks as you tried to adjust yourself from the sudden change of scenery in-front of you as you hadn’t moved out of your chair for what seemed like hours. “Aw, my apologies Y/N! Just wanted to check up on you, you’ve been glued to that desk for the past few hours y’know~” he teased, basically confirming that theory as he took his hands off your shoulders and walked over next to you, propping himself up to sit on the desk you were currently working at. “Well, i guess I’ve just been pretty busy.” You replied, spinning back around in your chair to take a look at him once again, scratching the back of your head sheepishly. “Why don’t you come on a walk with me? Clear that pretty little head of yours?~”. He teased, having that mischievous wide smirk on his face that you had always noticed. You would constantly take note of the tiniest things about his features that you just absolutely adored about him. The pink hue on your face became more visible as he spoke, word after word it made your face practically glow with pink. After a few seconds of contemplating wherever or not to say yes to his suggestion, you sighed as you look back at your paperwork and then back at him with a slight smile before replying. “Sure then, let’s go.”
The walk was beyond peaceful surprisingly enough. Dazai was walking alongside you with his two hands behind his head, taking small glances at your expression as you looked up at the stars, seeming so in awe with them. “You like them?” He leaned forward with a smile as he tried to get a more clear look of your facial features, taking every little detail in. There was a long pause before your answer as you nodded slowly, admiring it all. “Yeah, they’re beautiful.” You said in response. Dazai took in how soft your voice was, how gentle your facial expressions were as you stare in admiration at the sparkling dots in the sky. He took a sharp breath before saying something else in reply. “You’re breathtaking, you know that right..?”. You paused for a moment, still staring at the midnight sky as you then turned to him with a playful smirk, rolling your eyes to his flirting. “Thank you, Dazai.” You replied sarcastically, expecting another one of his flirtatious and foolish remarks. “No, Y/N listen to me.” He took his hands off his head and stood in-front of you, taking your hands into his own whilst staring at you with such a fond expression. “You are- absolutely breathtaking.” He repeated his words once more, waiting for a response. You took a few seconds again, confused as to what was happening and thinking it was just Dazai playing tricks on you once again. “I- thank—“ you tried but before you could’ve even gave a response back, he just blurts it out within an instant.
“I love you, Y/N.”
There was a long silence shared amongst the two of you, the only thing heard was the wind bristling against the trees and a few cars bypassing. You were the one to first break the silence, not by speaking, but by literally laughing. Dazai stood there stunned for a moment, letting go of your hands with a look of confusion riddled across his face as you hugged your chest, laughing hysterically. “Oh- ahah! Oh Dazai you are- so remarkably funny!” You gasped out in between laughs, absolutely losing yourself. “W-what..? Y/N what are you talking about?” He asked, a look of concern also struck on his face. There was suddenly another long pause when you eventually stopped laughing as soon as he said that. Your sudden wide eyes shot up to look at his sort of hurt expression and you tilt your head. “You- were joking were you not?” “No?” Well now you looked like a complete fool. You took a few steps back, processing this and just refused to believe it. “I don’t believe you.” “Y/N I’m serious.” God, even just the word ‘serious’ rolling off his tongue felt so wrong but oh, just the way he looked at you with that genuine expression had you weak in the knees and second guessing everything for a moment. “Do you not see the way I look at you? God, Y/N I’m so in love with you I’ve never been more serious in my life.” He stared at you with his beautiful brown eyes piercing through you like bullets, not breaking any eye contact whatsoever. You felt a cold shiver run down you before responding. “Seriously?” “Seriously.” He replied within an instant, seeming so sure about that. “You own my heart L/N.” That statement sure was bold and you absolutely adored it, you adored him. You took a step forward, taking his hands into your own and smiling down at the sight, intertwining your fingers with his and gave him a soft smile as you tilted your head up. “You own my heart too Osamu.” You replied. Once you did, Dazai had to take a breather, letting go of the breath he had currently held in for about a whole minute of waiting for you to reply with something not so negative. “Whew! Y/N don’t leave me on a hanger like that ever again- that was seriously wounding.” He said, chuckling nervously but smoothly covered it up with a composed expression on his face, he’s secretly dying on the inside though. He moved his hand forward pulling you closer to him, embracing you tightly and wrapping his arms around you fully, looking up at the sky like you had done. Once you pulled away from the tight embrace you looked up at the brunettes face as if you were analysing something about him. he glanced right back at you.
“What?” He asked, quirking his eyebrow up in question.
“I think that’s the first time I’ve ever seen you be so serious..” You admitted.
“What?!" He gasped dramatically, placing his hand on his heart. “Absurd! I’ve been serious more times than you can even count!” He huffs. You cocked your eyebrow up at him in response. “I mean, if that’s what helps you sleep at night.” You teased, smirking and glancing back up at the stars. He then let out a dramatic exhale before returning the same smirk you had on your face. “Bold of you to even assume I do sleep, don’t make me take my words back, Bella!~” There it was again. The same unserious mischievous scheming bastard of a man who somehow owned your precious heart.
Who knew a man like him could actually be so serious? damn, you owed Ranpo so much money.
a/n: not my best work but it felt like a waste to write all that and not publish it :( i'll drop the gojo fluff tmrw
also pls pls pls leave angst ideas in my askbox i love writing angst and i'm better at it too :,)
"i never knew you could cook!"
dazai turns around and looks at you incredulously. you had just come home unexpectedly early, and judging from the mouth-watering scent of food on the stove, dazai was cooking.
your boyfriend, who you had thought was hopeless in the kitchen is cooking, and it smells pretty damn good.
"ah, sweetheart, you're home. just in time to make unfair assumptions about my cooking." dazai shakes his head dramatically and turns back to the stove, using a spatula to stir whatever he's cooking.
you hang your coat up besides the door to your apartment and stroll over to the kitchen, where you pour yourself a glass of water. "can i try some?"
"darling, don't you think i'll give you food poisoning?" looks like someone took your earlier comment personally.
"pleeease, 'samu? it smells really good," you say, taking a sip of your water.
dazai brushes his hair out of his eyes and hums a tune to himself, clearly ignoring you.
"drama queen," you huff, tugging at the back of his shirt.
your overly-dramatic boyfriend finally looks at you and makes a face. "why does everyone assume i'm a terrible cook? first chuuya, then kunikida, and now you too??"
still making a face, dazai adjusts the heat on the stove and scours one of the cabinets for something. he seems offended that even you, his girlfriend, would assume that he can't cook when he's given you no reason to think so.
"'samu, you just don't seem like the type of person who'd be good at-" you stop talking and smile sheepishly when dazai turns and glares at you. "um, i mean, you seem like an amazing cook! i bet there's no one better!"
that makes dazai smile, and you can feel him start to warm up to you. "say 'pretty please.'"
you smile and tilt your chin up. "pretty please can i taste some?"
dazai's always been a tease, so it doesn't surprise you much when he sets down the spatula and twirls a strand of your hair around his finger. "mmm, i don't know..."
"osamu dazai, give me a bite."
a smirk paints itself across dazai's face, and he pulls you closer to him by your waist. "desperate much?"
"i've had a long day and i'm hungry and tired, 'samu, just give me one bite," you groan, pressing your face into his arm.
"fine, fine," dazai says with a laugh, switching off the stove. "c'mere, i don't wanna spill anything."
you lean in and he finally gives you a bite of his cooking. and the second your mouth registers the taste, your taste buds are in heaven. this was the best food you've had in a while, and it was written all over your face.
dazai laughs again and moves his hand from your waist to around your shoulder. "you liked it, didn't you~?"
"how could i ever assume you were a bad cook?"
"that's what i'm saying, darling!"
as he makes you a towering plate of food, you hear all about how, back in the mafia, he made meals for chuuya when he had to work late. as time went on, his cooking just became better and better, and eventually he began to cook almost every night.
"aw, so you were like his malewife. did you do the cleaning too?"
dazai scoffs and leads you to the couch before setting your plate into your lap and sitting next to you. "no, that was chuuya's specialty. could you really see me cleaning on a daily basis?"
he was right – even now, you knew that the primary reason he barely had any stuff in his apartment was because he didn't want to have to clean a bunch.
"no, i guess not," you answer, more preoccupied with the food. "this is so, so good, 'samu. why have i never tasted your cooking before?"
dazai's face goes red as he looks away and mumbles "ah, that was because i wanted to eat your cooking."
a soft laugh slips from your lips at the sheepish look on his face. "translation, you just wanted an extended break from cooking."
"ah, you might be right, darling."
"i always am."
a/n: even after writing this i still think that canon dazai would be a terrible cook sorry bbg
as always reblogs are vvv appreciated if u liked it 💞💞
Anon: Hey! I'm the same anon who requested yan!pmboss!dazai. And can you do the scenario in the beast au?? Like you can add some interactions with the otheer casts too! I know I should have told you before, sorry it was late!
The beloved wife of the notorious Mafia boss of Yokohama's famed Port Mafia is none other than you. The woman that held the devil's heart and the one that was dearly treasured by Dazai Osamu himself.
You were married to each other for more than four years, such talks of bearing children filled your ears. As the mafia boss' woman, anyone who dared make you uncomfortable, suffered a terrible fate.
"How about children? Will we finally try for one?" Your husband asks, enjoying the scent of your newly bathed self from behind.
"You know how I feel about having children. I'm sorry, Osamu but can we please don't talk about this now?" You tiredly said. Children doesn't make you uncomfortable, the thought of bearing one is the thing that made your spine shiver.
"I suppose so. You had a bad day, let me make it up to you know. I promise to give you contraceptives after, alright?" You slowly nodded. Protection wasn't Dazai's thing in the first place, so the only option you can only rely on are the pills or even tea.
A passion so bright emerged from that night, never stopping even after the sun made its light.
The morning after, Dazai sighed as he laid his head on his desk.
"Oi, dumbass- I mean boss. If you don't want to work, just take a damn leave." The most trusted executive appeared with a pile of papers in his hands.
"How mean of you, Chuuya. I'm just tired, I barely slept last night." An all too familiar smirk begins to form on Dazai's face.
"Gross. Keep your sex life away from me, you asshole." Chuuya said, placing the pile on the main desk.
"So. What's wrong?" The alcoholic asked, massaging his forehead from his hangover.
"I want children." Dazai bluntly said while Chuuya nearly choked from his coffee.
"Why the fuck would you suddenly tell that to me you bastard?!!" Chuuya shouted when he recovered his windpipe.
"Don't look at me like that. You're the one who asked me." The brunette countered back.
"How would I know that that's bothering you?!! Isn't your wife still fertile? She's still not in her forty's or somethin'." The fedora bearer asked.
"She doesn't want to get pregnant." Dazai sighed. In times like this, he would've find a solution himself but he was unable to come up with something.
"Adoption?" Chuuya suggested.
"It doesn't feel right. Besides, I want to see a mini version of my darling." Dazai swiftly rejects the idea.
The executive just raised his brow at this. After thinking a possible solution to his boss' plight, a light bulb finally appeared in his mind.
"A pet? Sarah said that her pet cat is equivalent to her baby." Chuuya said the last part under his breath.
"Sarah? So that's the name of your new fuck buddy." Dazai humored.
"Fuck you!" A vein popped from the redhead.
"Alright, alright. Get out, thank you not for your wonderful ideas." A mocking salute from the mafia boss sends the executive in a state of fury. Slamming the door, a loud curse echoed from behind.
"A pet, huh?"
A new plight begins when Dazai thought about the perfect pet for his darling.
He first bought a parrot, training it to say 'I Love You, [S/o-chan].' After a week or so, the parrot finally learned the trick.
"I love you, [S/o-chan]. I love you, [S/o-chan]." The parrot repeatedly chirped.
Dazai was happy at first, patting his own back from his hard work. However, he soon regretted it once he fully knows the weight of his plan.
"I love you, [S/o-chan]."
"Shut. Up." Dazai slammed his hands on the desk. What had he done? How can he not notice it sooner.
"I love you, [S/o-chan]."
"I said shut up!" He snapped, shaking the golden cage he thoughtfully bought for the bird. Only he can say I love you to his beloved. Not anyone, not anything. Especially not a mindless bird that can only talk.
"I love you, [S/o-chan]."
He opened the metal cage, the bird stopping its chant and finally flew around the cage in a panic.
He brought his two hands to the small neck of the pretty bird. Squeezing it tight, the parrot let out its last chirp.
It seems like the parrot or any bird is crossed out from his list.
The second one is a large red Arowana fish. Its ruby scales shimmered from the bright light. An animal that doesn't need constant attention. Perfect, he'll let his subordinate feed it while his wife can admire its beautiful scales. He can finally gift this to his darling.
A grand aquarium was brought to his office. For the mean time, he will enjoy the happy smile of his beloved from his gift.
Dazai invited you to his office the next day, pleading you to spend lunch at his workplace. You agreed excitedly.
A hug and a breathtaking kiss showed him how much you appreciate it once you finally saw the big fish.
You softly tapped at the aquarium eager for it to recognize you. Your excitement turned into disappointment when it didn't even acknowledged your presence.
Dazai saw your frown and brought in his subordinate. He took the Arowana's food from the subordinate and placed it into your hands.
"Maybe it's just hungry, try feeding it." You were reluctant but still held onto the container.
A few drops and still, the Arowana didn't respond.
"Is it sick?" You asked.
"You know I wouldn't gave it to you if it's sick." Dazai frowned. Another failure. This is worse than the first since he can see how disappointed you were.
Lunch followed soon after, Dazai tooked you out on a date as an apology.
After the day, he gazed at the fish thinking what was wrong with it. Feeding time came and the subordinate fed the now happy fish.
Oh. So now it's happy?
His gaze darkened as he grabbed his gun under the desk.
A shot was fired. The carpet was soaked from the dripping aquarium.
"You. What did you do with the fish?" Dazai said, now aiming for the head of his subordinate.
"N-nothing! I just fed it!" The subordinate shakingly kneeled, wondering what he did wrong for his boss to react negatively.
"I hate liars the most." The bullet went through the subordinate's knee. "Take him to the dungeons." The guards did what he asked, manhandling the now limping subordinate.
Truthfully, it wasn't a lie. He just wanted to blame someone from his mistake. The food wasn't drugged. The fish cared for the subordinate in return to the subordinate's caring behavior towards it. It was too bad that it chose the wrong person to care for.
Now, the red Arowana was left gasping from the lack of water from its tank. The fish struggled and struggled until it died slowly from a painful death.
Fish
"'Samu? I know that you already apologized from the fish but..." You started but you let it out once you thought of how selfish you might be if you asked for more.
You squeaked as a pair of lips touched yours ever so softly.
"Speak up, my love. I can't hear you if you keep whispering." Your husband teased as you flushed.
"I-I want a puppy..." You stammered out. His dislike to dogs is never hidden but you adored them. You wanted one but you can't bring up the topic to him ever since. You found a chance when he finally bought a pet.
"A puppy?" You prepared for the worse.
"[S/o]! You already have meeee!" Dazai whined burying his face into your chest. "I'm much more more better than a puppy!"
"D-dazai!" You whimpered at his teasing nips at your mounds.
"What if I bought you a pet that can replace a puppy?" He asked, inhaling your sweet scent, almost lulling him to sleep.
"Fine, you have three days to bring me one!" You jokingly added.
"Alright, I'll give you the bestest gift there is."
"Meow."
When Dazai said the he'll replace the puppy you thought that he will find a close relative of the dogs. However, the surprise is much pleasant.
You nearly hugged the kitten to its death once your eyes landed on it. Two blue round doe eyes adorned its sockets. A shade so beautiful you can't stop thanking Dazai for founding it.
It was actually Chuuya who found it, but he gave it to Dazai when he almost smacked his head when Dazai considered giving you an orca as a pet.
The perfect pet is now decided. Now he will wait for the right time to convince you to bear children for him. Although, he will surely get rid of the clingy feline as soon as the both of your child was born.
Atleast that was what he planned until another stray cat ruined his plan.
After Dazai gifted you the kitten, you prepared a homemade bento for him during lunch and made way into his office. You wanted to thank him once more for the wonderful gift.
You encountered Atsushi on the way, he greeted you and even asked if you want him to escort you to Dazai. You agreed, making him take the bottle of sake while you carried the bento.
"Dazai-san, [S/o-san] is here." Atsushi first knocked on the heavy doors, making his way inside once he heard a 'come in'.
"Atsushi-kun! What a surprise to see you, thank you for assisting my darling wife." Dazai cheered beaming at the sight of sake in his hands.
"It was no problem, Dazai-san." Atsushi bowed, taking his leave once he confirmed that you no longer needed any help.
"Oh, what's this? I smell crab." Your husband eagerly opened the bento, his mouth, watering from the sight of his favorite dish.
"If I knew you would cook for me, I would've brought a thousand of kittens everyday!" You chukled slightly at his claim.
"I would make your lunch from now on if you just said so." You said, looking around his office.
"Oh, where's the big fish?" You asked.
"You were right. The fish was sick so I took it to the vet." He smiled.
But why did the aquarium also disappeared? You kept the question to yourself.
"Ah, only three cups of sake for you. You still have work to do." He pouted.
"Five cups." Dazai bargained.
"Three."
"Five."
"Three."
"Three."
"Five...damn it." A simple reverse psychology had you bit your own tounge at your blunder.
"Yay! Thank you my dear!" Immediately, Dazai sips the first cup. A sigh of satisfaction left his lips.
The satisfaction turned for the worst to Dazai's chagrin. An emergency meeting about the mafia's treasury interrupted the lovely with his darling.
Dazai gave you a kiss and headed towards the conference room. As much as he wants to drag you with him, he can't– since he wanted you to be in the perfect condition. He can't risk to taint your pristine mentality, atleast not now.
Atsushi was tasked to protect you from unwanted presences while Dazai was away.
When the meeting is still ongoing, you left the office, wanting to stretch your legs.
With Atsushi beside you, the other members immediately took their gaze away from you as they soon realized who you are. They can still remember the haunting screams of their fellow comrade when he dared looked at you in the eye.
At the nearby private areas that were protected by the Port Mafia, you took a stroll. Engaging the tiger-shifter into a conversation of sorts.
When the day ended, you can't help but feel pity to the boy. You met him just as soon you became Dazai's wife. Your husband entrusted Atsushi as your personal guard as he was trustworthy. You lost count of how many times let him cry in your shoulders since then. The orphanage, the headmaster, and his terrifying regret when he strayed from Dazai's order.
Atsushi was just a lost child that was blinded from the path of light and you took it as your job to be someone he can freely call mother.
"Oh my dear wife, I wonder what did you do now?" Dazai asked to himself, eyes staring blankly at his wide office windows. Somehow, he can feel that things will go down an ominous path from now.
"Atsushi-kun, I see that you become closer with my darling wife. Good job, is there something you want as a reward?" Dazai said, his lips' ends widening ever so slowly.
"No, Dazai-san. There is nothing else that I could've asked for." Atsushi gazed the ground, his hands remained to his back as he listened to whatever his superior is saying to him.
"I knew I made a good choice when I met you that night!" Dazai clapped and a cage was placed upon his desk.
The cage was opened and your beloved pet emerged from the depths of the cage.
The soft mewing turned into a hiss when the cat noticed that its owner is missing.
At the snap of Dazai's fingers, a bowl of cat food was placed on his desk. The cat trudging silently to the bowl. It let out a purr of its mouth from the gentle strokes Dazai gave behind its ear.
"I can't help but compare you to a cat, Atsushi-kun. I remembered how much you trembled that night. Tell me, do you regret it when you joined the Port Mafia?" Still focusing at the way the cat eats, Dazai gingerly drummed his fingers– waiting for Atsushi's answer.
"No, Dazai-san. Not even once did I regret when you saved me from the orphanage." Atsushi finally gave his answer after calming his anxious thoughts.
Why? Why did he asked that now? Did he do anything wrong?
No.
No. No. No. Nonononono. It can't be. Anything but that.
"D-dazai-san? Did I do something wrong? Do you plan to kick me out?! Please! Please, don't leave me! T-the orphanage! Don't take me back there!" The anxiety and endless malicious whispers made the silver haired crack. Before he knew it, he was on his knees while begging for his boss to forgive him.
"No need for crying, Atsushi-kun. If you truly suffer from your mistake then it will be no problem for you to follow my order." Dazai sighed in exaggeration.
"Yes! I'll do whatever it is, so please! Please don't bring me back to that hell!!"
"Don't worry, I'm sure you can perfectly do this task. It is very simple, so you don't have to worry one bit!" He gave off a faux smile of reassurance.
"I want you to stay away from [S/o-chan] from now on."
Atsushi's eyes went wide.
"...Why?" He gritted his teeth. "Dazai-san, I don't understand at all. She was like a mother to me!" Dazai frowned at this.
"How funny, I never think of you as my son." It was just a tone above a whisper but Atsushi heard it loud and clear.
His words echoed deeply into Atsushi's skull. The click of a gun broke the chatters in his mind.
Bang.
He awaited for the pain, for the blood to flow from the bullet hole in his body. But when he opened his eyes, he was not the targeted shot.
In Dazai's desk, there was a corpse that peacefully laid. Blood poured on the wood as it escaped to the carpeted floor.
The memory of the cat's body forever embedded in his mind. What was worst is that it was not any cat. It was your's.
He wasn't stupid. He knew what Dazai wanted to convey to him.
'A stray useless cat like you is easily disposed of. Think twice before you disobey my orders again.'
Time flows rapidly but Atsushi is still shocked from the event. There was something they dissected from the cat in the corner of his eyes.
Time flows rapidly. The cat's corpse was already discarded but Atsushi still stayed on his knees.
A haunting black ornate box was given to Dazai.
"You know, Atsushi-kun. I'll let you off this time, In fact– I'll even share you a secret I've hidden." The smile of reassurance turned into an unnerving one.
"You see, my darling would be terribly mad when she knows of it and I hate it when she's in a bad mood. So I want this to be kept between us."
'This will test your loyalty to me.'
"My secret lies in this box," a tap on the said object. "The box that no one but me knows of."
'I'll kill you if anyone finds it.'
"Come closer, Atsushi-kun." Dazai ushered the boy once he opened the peculiar box.
The bile rose in Atsushi's throat, covering his mouth before puking on the bloodied floor.
"This is a secret between the two of us, 'kay?"
"Psps!" You called out to your cat, even holding a strip of catnip to desperately hear the familiar mewing noises of your beloved cat.
You grew dejected. You already searched. the entire house five times and still, no signs of your lost pet.
Plopping at the living room's couch, you sulked at the once again empty house.
It was no means literally empty, your husband did go all out on the decor and even buy you exotic bordering on rare floras. It was too much that he had to build a greenhouse inside the house.
However, no matter how much riches he filled the house– it still feels drastically empty.
You know that it is not safe outside. As the wife of one of the most feared men in Yokohama, you knew better than to put your life in danger just for a trip outside.
The long hours of Dazai's work did not help ease the loneliness in your core.
You sighed as you tried to entertain yourself with the contents that the television provided you.
"Osamu's gonna kill me for losing the cat." And without even fully knowing it, drowsiness took over your body.
A kiss on your cheek was what you first felt, then another and another until your face was peppered by chaste kisses.
Waking up from your nap on the couch, you saw an all too familiar face in front of you.
Muttering a soft 'Welcome back', you stretched and yawn before hugging Daza's torso.
"Wan!" Your husband's poor imitation of a dog elicit a faint giggle from you but then you heard another sound, a more realistic one.
"No way..." You stared at him. "Is that what I think it is?!" You almost shouted at excitement.
Dazai only gave you a grin in return before handing you the pup behind his back.
The shimmering coat felt smooth beneath your fingertips, the pup– a golden retriever immediately lick a stripe on your face.
You don't know how much Dazai relished at the happy look in your features. If this is how you reacted to the puppy, he can only imagine how happy you are when you hold your child in your arms. His heart swelled at the thought.
In due time, you will be busy with the child to even notice him murdering the dog in the background. In due time.
After all, patience is certainly a sweet sweet virtue.
"I'm what?" Your mouth hanged at disbelief.
"You're pregnant. Congratulations, Mrs. Dazai!" The underground doctor beamed at you.
Pregnant. Pregnancy. That was the reason why your father look at your mother in such disgust. He left while your mother beared you in her womb. You can still feel her heart-wrenching sorrow when your mother told you the tale about your father.
No. This can't be. This will never happen.
"You must've been mistaken. I've been taking conservatives, it is impossible for me to get pregnant." You denied, even checking the calendar if it is April 1st or even October 30. It was neither, it was still in the middle of May.
"I assure you, your symptoms and even test results showed that you are pregnant for 8 weeks at most." The doctor revised her notes.
You had troubles at regaining your breath, your chest felt too heavy that you can't help but clutched at it.
"Mrs. Dazai?" The doctor's word was your wake up call.
"Yes?"
"I said you can go now." Ushering you out of the clinic after giving you notes and even a guide about pregnancy life, the doctor gently closed the door.
The day finally ended and you still don't have the guts to tell Dazai the supposedly happy news. But knowing him, the doctor would probably already told him.
You heart clenched at the thought of Dazai's face turning into a scowl at the news of you bearing his child.
"He'll leave me."
To say that Dazai was disappointed was an understatement. The news of your disappearance instantly reached his ears.
"Oi, I don't know what the two of you lovebirds fighting about but what the fuck did you do to make your wife flee from your house?" Chuuya questioned him.
"Just shut up. Double the men searching for her, you better find her before the sun rises." Chuuya only raised his brow at this. This sudden ill treatment didn't appear during the last four years. Looks like his boss is really whipped for you.
Although Chuuya was never the religious type, he can't help but pray for you for sticking up with his boss for the rest of your life.
Not even an hour later, the executive returned. The info of you finally brought to your shared home albeit a little forcefully, calmed Dazai.
After entrusting the rest of his work to Chuuya (to the redhead's grimace), Dazai rushed forward to the place where you're at.
The sight of your swolled red eyes and dampened cheeks irked the male but the important thing is you are finally in his arms.
"Do you know how much I'm worried for you? Why did you suddenly leave?!" He gripped your shoulders tightly.
"I..." You looked down in fear for awaiting the disgust in his face.
Your husband forced you to look at him and the slightest hint of disgust never tainted his face. You only saw disappointment in his face, maybe a hint of anger and pain but never disgust.
"I-I thought you'll leave me! The fear of you abandoning me haunts me to this very day!" You look so damn breakable right now, as if the slightest will end you shattered on the ground.
"That was not your place for ever thinking of me like that! How low do you think of me? I already vowed to be with you forevermore, 'till death do us apart?" Dazai argued, keeping his ground despite of all the tears you shed.
"Your trust in me severely lacks and I'm very disappointed at you right now." A hardened gaze was directed at you as you flinched.
"I'm sorry! I'm very sorry-!" You sobbed continuously as you kneeled before him, clutching on his leg. "Please forgive me!" Choking at your own cries, you apologized.
"Alright, I'll forgive you. I'm sure you didn't mean to disappoint me, darling." Dazai gently lifted you to your feet.
A whimper caught your attention. Wiping your tears, you opened your arms for the approaching retriever.
"I'm sorry for leaving you too." You ruffled the dog's head, a bark of acknowledgement was your response from the pet.
"Stupid mutt, interrupting the lovely time with my wife." You were suprised to see Dazai kicking the dog.
"Dazai!" You shouted, immediately rushing to comfort the now whimpering mess of a dog.
"Why-?!" Your word flew past him while he kept abusing your treasured friend.
The dog howled and wailed at the pain.
"Look at it. This pathetic, slimey, disgusting abomination!" Kick.
"Can you hear how hard it breathes with its broken ribs puncturing its pitiful lungs? It was begging to die!" Dazai hollered with laughter.
He tossed a gun beside you. The same gun that he shot at the aquarium. The same gun that killed the doe eyed kitten.
"Why don't you grant it a merciful death? As its beloved owner, you should end its suffering." Your husband smiled at you.
"Either you kill it or I will." He grew tired of waiting yet you still shivered in fear.
He grabbed your hands, making you hold the gun in its place. The cold metal chilled your skin. The trigger ever so forcefully pushed by your finger as you sobbed.
Once he rids of the dog, cradling you in his arms. He hugged you from behind.
"You are a terrible owner, my dear." Dazai whispered. Handing you a rather heavy black box.
"But you'll be a wonderful mother." He said while rubbing your barely bulging belly from behind.
You clutched your mouth to lower down your scream. The pair of blue eyes stared at you from the insides of the box. You can only sob in horror to the other items in the box.
The talking parrot's little head.
The Arowana's fins and scales.
And lastly, your beloved pet cat's pair of azure orbs.
How it starts and how she is:
-You can decide how you wish to meet her, whether it be you on the way home, in highschool, work, or even you falling on her apartmen't balcony! You're still her lover regardless
on a side note: you won't work out if you're an enemy cause- yeah
-Most likely it is her to confess due to the teasingbullying she endures with Ayatsuji and her other co-workers.
-And maybe even a little push from her superiors as well
-There is also... a big chance she said it while ranting to you and proceeded to run away after a quick short circuit
-At the beginning of the relationship, she's a whole loving mess. Like- really... a mess. You can name any love language and you'd be (un)surprised to know that she can do ollat- (it'll take time for her to tone it down)
-Still, despite that, she's clumsy and kind of awkward- not really experience in relationships. Her feelings for you are so intense that she wants to do EVERYTHING for you no matter how crazy/hsrs.
-She loves the feeling of warmth in her chest whenever you call her sweet names or do something for her- she's addicted. There is NO one who can be more heads-over-heels for you as her and that's for certain.
How she is in the relationship in general:
-Everything she does with you is based on what you like, not her own fantasy. She wants everything as real as they can get
-The type of person who wakes you up really early to eat breakfast with you before work. But if you're stubborn- dw she can eat by herself! But please eat the food she left just for you
-She's lowkey clingy but mostly in private cause she's a very professional person (so hardworking fr)
-Super happy and jumpy when you hold her hand- it's enough to loosen her up a bit
-She is also really honest in her words but may slightly sugarcoat stuff she thinks would hurt you or you wouldn't like to hear
-She thinks lying in a relationship is only an option if it's life or death
-Speaking of lying though- she *cough* uses it as a way to surprise you.
"Happy Birthday!- sorry for lying to you earlier I wanted to surprise you :>"
-Okay- "now that's an exception" she says
-Can't tell if she's a jealous person or not but I suppose it depends on who you're with and how you interact. She will be too afraid to mention so but if you ask her about it she will tell.
-Doesn't stop you from making friends but keeps an eye out for the shady bitches.
-Help her pls how does she multitask all that with work
-Secretly asks some advice from random happy couples she sees cause she wants to make you happy
-What a cutiee <33
-Protects you from Ayatsuji cause that guy is always messing with her
-Out of all the Special Division, she's the easiest to prank due to her slightly gullible nature like when... Ayatsuji managed to make her make him coffee
-Though don't do it always- she has feelings, she loves you and will be slightly hurt that you can do that to her (unless it's a cute prank), and she's reallyyyyyy busy </3
-No matter how confident she is, she is afraid she doesn't spend much time with you which kinda bugs her
-You know how in each daily job she sets a goal for herself? You're about 50% of that goal
-She's motivated enough to see you everyday in your amazing style, unique personality, and hopefully some free time
-If you're not free, she's helping you. You can't stop her! It's the perfect time to flex that top-notch performance to you
-Doesn't matter how tired. She. is. right. there.
-She has beauty sleep but who cares- she's literally "strict"
-But if your lazy though, expect her to make you finish you work (as unconvincing as she is she tries)
-Takes her time to cook food for you. Like- legit tries lots of recipes that apparently suits your taste. Also cooks with you because there she gets to observe how you like it. (pls cook her food too it will make her really happy)
-You both alternate on what to watch. Spoiler alert: She chooses paranormal docs and totally James Bonde (and Legally Blonde)
-Don't even question it...
-When you do pick though, she sits through it even if it's crappy. She's happy if your happy!
-And if it makes you happy- she's all about what you like pretty much.
You like to draw? She cleared her work load to go to an art museum with you! You like dress up? PERECT! She has quite an eye for these. You like anything !? HIT HER UP
-When you both play games together she lets you have your fun unless... you're really smug about your wins or the game is monopoly;
"YOU'RE GOING DOWN >:("
-She's competitive and it's a fact. If you still win after that she's just gonna accept her defeat and sob all the way homeee
-Big thing for her is when you style each other. Like hair, clothes, or makeup- doesn't matter your gender, she's ON
-Ofc you look the best cause Agent 4048 is always best girl
-She takes the day off when you're very sick or hurt. And by very, it's the really bad ones cause she's not gonna sacrifice her top-notch performance for a small cold!
-Unless it gets worse, contact her pls
-If she isn't availableshe's really guilty, she has someone do her a favor by checking in on you + every cost is on her
-You could have COVID and she's still gonna go through all that effort (RIP her bank acc btw)
-You're sad, she's comforting you even from afar.
-You're sad because of something, bye for that person
-No, she's not overprotective and she's not gonna hurt them or something... but there maybe some warning involved
-Unless it's family and friends, she can't do that unless necessary that is
-But if you're sad because of her- oh lord, she's probably not notice sooner. Please tell her though, she wants to know what she did wrong, when, or whatever details involved
-She wants to be exact that she'll never do that AGAIN.
Speaking of which,
In arguments:
-Okay so let's divide this into three parts
-1. If it was her fault
-She's mad mad
-She argues with you but is more submissive in tone because she knows who is at fault
-She's been through a lot enough to tell
-But 50% chance she doesn't know what she did wrong so please explain and be reasonable
-So, when you tell her, she will do her best to explain herself if there was even one to begin with
-Is canonically, not a fan of lectures but is willing to take it if it means understanding your side
-But then again she canonically doesn't like adults without sense nor problems with no answers
-So don't go:
"Mizuki, I'm mad because you ate all my chocolate so my cat would poop out my paperwork >:("
-No, don't. She's gonna get irked
-Continuing though, she will help solve whatever is bothering the love of her life at any station in life even if it was her own fault and will take responsibility for all damages applied
-But if there's no use, she'll just tell you to forget it and focus on the present
-+ You have a very guilty Mizuki at your bedside, holding your favorite breakfast
-Guilty asf
-10/10 understanding, is reasonable, cares, and green flag
-2. If it was all your fault
-If it was kind of a light problem, she's really really forgiving
-She's 20% lowkey annoyed and may have lashed out a bit and 80% caring still
-But don't mistake this girl boss for some weak fellow
-She will fight
-Especially, if it was a really important topic
-She wouldn't lash out at first but if you start screaming she does the same
-If you're calm, she's kinda scolding you tbh but calm and firm
-She's like uhh
-Kindergarten Teacher! (totally ^^) or a big sister or your mom??
-That's a way to describe it I think but she does it the same way she scolds Ayatsuji
-She would never hit you though but if you hit her...like in the abusive way she's fighting
-8.5/10, still caring but don't fight her dammit
-Now 3. is if you were both at fault
-If you're the type to be blinded by anger, ya'll probably don't even realize it, being angry at each other
-Expect a hopefully non-violent fight
-If you aren't violent that is cause she sure isn't towards you
-Be careful too she has a very extraordinary ability...
-Who knows wtf will happen ToT
-Admittedly she's quite emotional too so it's crying and firm sentences from her
-But no matter the type of argument, as long as you both aren't broken up after it you're both fine!
On Birthdays:
-Everything is extra-extra-extra special for you unless you don't like it that way then sure!
-Plans a small party, the people you love are invited!
-Unless of course you don't like that... (she's indecisive 'til you're sure with what you like)
-But, if there's one thing for sure, she 100% prepares a really pretty gift and cooks you food
-Like- appreciate her cause she's so happy she's able to give you that
-Especially when she's been at work for so long
-Speaking of which- she would NEVER forgive herself if she allowed work to make her miss any special days
-Yes, your birthday included
-Girl would be so guilty she might as well burn her office to spend eons with you
-On her birthday, she would enjoy a small gathering with her co-workers, mentors, and YOU
-And maybe a little bit of your family and friends if she's good with them
-Honestly- you don't even have to give her a gift! People spending time with her and treating her with kindness literally just completes her day
-But of course, out of tradition, you should....
-She'd be really happy regardless of what your gift is for her! (unless it's something offensive like an empty box with the word mom written inside)
-She's soo good fr!!
-10000000000000293028392489032470927490273490234739047903274037204790237490234902horizontal8/10 very good partner!
-A little confused but she's got the spirit!
Please remember that this is my impression and opinions of how Tsujimura would be in a relationship! Sorry it's kinds short ^0^
Dividers Cr.: @cafekitsune, @v6que
Tagging! @hopefulpain
I love your braces-zai so much in fact it actually pushed me to get braces cause I was so scared anyways HE'S SO ADORABLE MY BABY give him all the hugs for me 🥺 I feel like he's a particularly sassy cat and I wanna squish him and YOUR ART EVOKES AN EMOTION. IN ME I CAN'T NAME AND IT'S SO PRETTY HAVE A GREAT DAYYY! :D
this is so so sweet :( <3 i had braces when i was younger and i remember being really self conscious about it at the time. if my art can help people feel more confident in themselves then i'm really grateful and happy!! THANK YOU SO MUCH FOR THE KIND WORDS have a braces-zai wishing you the best :) ♡
"I will locate you, no matter the universe we find ourselves in."
GENRE: Romance
WARNINGS: Mentions of beast!au, slight angst, established relationship, petnames, I believe in lovesick Dazai supremacy
SUMMARY: In every universe, without fail, Dazai will unfailingly find you, akin to an owner seeking their beloved sheep. Across the vast expanse of realities, his unwavering love and connection persist, guiding him to your side time and time again.
"What is it about those bell earrings of yours that you adore so much?"
Dazai leans in, his chin propped on his hands, as he gazes across the desk. You shrug, your fingers tapping away on the laptop keyboard to wrap up the reports. "They're adorable and stylish. Does the tinkling sound bother you?"
With a smile, he shakes his head. "No, not at all! In fact, I find it quite adorable."
You raise an eyebrow, casting a suspicious gaze at him. "Adorable? In what way?"
As he giggles playfully, he points at your earrings and explains, "You remind me of a sheep when you wear those bells. Sheeps wear bells so their owners can locate them, so it feels like you wear them so I can find you!" You furrow your brow, slightly puzzled by his whimsical analogy.
You chuckle softly, shaking your head and letting out a sigh. "You and your imaginative theories..."
Dazai dramatically gasps, pretending to be offended, and rises from his office chair. "I swear, I'm speaking nothing but the truth!"
You nonchalantly murmur, your boredom evident as you click through the numerous tabs open on your laptop. "What offends me more is that you're implying you own me."
"I didn't mean it like that! Unless you want me to-"
"Exercise some professionalism, Dazai!" Kunikida's voice resonates from the other end of the office, infused with clear annoyance.
Grumbling under his breath, Dazai walks over to you with a lazy stride, dragging his chair and positioning it behind you. He rests his chin on your shoulders, and you willingly accommodate him, accustomed to his clinginess. "It feels like forever since we went on a date." he mumbles.
You cast him a sympathetic gaze, your expression tinged with a slight frown. "I'm sorry, 'Samu, but we can have a date after I finish my work, alright?"
His eyes sparkle with excitement as he lifts his head, gazing at you with delight. "Alright then, deal!" he exclaims happily.
A blush warms your cheeks as he wraps his arms tightly around you, planting a quick peck on your cheek. He begins pouring out words of adoration from his lips, expressing his affection with fervor.
You try to ignore him and gently push him away, whining about the importance of completing your work. Focused on the screen, you diligently type away, filling out the reports one by one. Lost in concentration, you remain unaware of Dazai's lingering gaze, his eyes softening as they trace the curves of your pouty lips and the adorable crinkle of your nose.
He adores gazing into your eyes, finding them captivating enough to hold his attention for hours on end. He imagines himself willingly plunging into the depths of your eyes, repeatedly drowning in their beauty, where each flutter of your eyelids resembles gentle waves playfully splashing around.
Your cheeks take on a rosy hue whenever he compliments you or touches you in any way. You try to hide and turn away, but your attempts prove futile as his hands gently grasp yours, offering a comforting hold.
Internally, he wonders about your lips, contemplating if they have always appeared so irresistibly kissable. Ever since you started dating, he consistently feels an intense desire to press his lips against yours or any other part of you, an urge to shower you with kisses and adoration that he can hardly contain.
"Hey, dear." Dazai interrupts your focus, snapping you out of your work. He smiles cheekily as you let out a groan of mild annoyance and turn your chair to face him.
"What?" you sigh out, caught off guard. You yelp in surprise as he swiftly pulls you into his arms, pressing your head against his chest. " 'Samu, what on earth is up with you today?"
"You know I love you, right?" he whispers, his fingers tenderly combing through your hair. You widen your eyes in response to his unexpected confession. Adjusting your position, you settle comfortably, positioning yourself to lie against him, resting your head on his shoulder. "Of course I do...why ask?"
"Do you trust me?" he hums, sensing your nervous tension in response to his question.
"Yes."
A small smile spreads across his face as his arms tighten around you. "How much do you trust me?" he asks, curiosity evident in his tone.
You pause, lost in contemplation as you ponder the question. How much do you trust him, indeed? It's a query that you've never quite been able to answer definitively, as your trust for him seems to have no bounds. You find yourself hesitating because you're aware of just how deeply you have fallen into the rabbit hole of trust with him. It's a level of trust that extends so far that, in dire circumstances where death appears to be the only outcome, you believe wholeheartedly that Dazai would somehow find a way to let you come out alive.
Dazai's heart skips a beat as he feels your fingers gripping onto him tightly. Your head is tilted down, and your voice carries a hint of cautiousness as you carefully phrase your words.
"I trust you to such an extent that even if we were separated across different universes, I have full confidence that you would find me."
Dazai experiences a peculiar sensation in his chest, a warmth that spreads throughout his being, prompting a genuine chuckle to escape his lips. His hands reach up to playfully toy with your bell earrings, causing them to emit a soft 'ding' sound. With a smile directed at you, he remarks.
"You really are like a sheep, aren't you?"
Dazai's trance is abruptly broken as an irritated voice cuts through, belonging to a familiar ginger-haired individual who narrows his eyes at the brunette.
"We've arrived." the ginger remarks sharply.
Dazai surveys the morning market, his gaze focused through one eye while the other remains concealed behind bandages, partially obscuring his face. "Why are you staring at the market? Our destination is that building over there- hey!"
The ginger sneers at his boss, vexed by his disregard for the complaints. He grits his teeth in annoyance as the brunette proceeds to walk away towards the market, disregarding their intended destination.
"As the boss of the Port Mafia, you should be punctual for meetings!" the executive exclaims, frustrated by Dazai's behavior. However, Dazai giggles at their exasperation and decides to venture off on his own. "Let the others know that I'll be exploring for a while! Thanks Chuuya!" he announces cheerfully before going off on his solo expedition.
"Wha- Get back here!"
For the first time, Dazai finds himself unsure of where his legs are taking him. Typically, he has a clear destination in mind, even when he wanders aimlessly through the streets or through the meandering paths of his own life. However, on this occasion, an indescribable feeling urges him to step into the bustling morning market, to lose himself amidst the vibrant street in search of something unknown.
Or perhaps, someone.
Unfazed by the perplexed and judgmental glances directed his way due to his unconventional attire, which comprises a suit adorned with a black coat and a loosely draped red scarf around his neck, Dazai continues to move forward with confidence. He pays no mind to the curiosity of others, remaining unperturbed as he follows the call of his instincts within the bustling market.
Dazai comes to a sudden stop in his tracks upon spotting a fruit stall. His mind drifts to memories of you purchasing large quantities of strawberries to create delectable strawberry parfaits for the agency. A wistful smile tugs at the corners of his lips as he reminisces, momentarily lost in thoughts of those sweet and joyful moments shared together.
Would you still enjoy making strawberry parfaits for him to taste in this universe?
Ding...ding...
The soft jingling of bells interrupts Dazai's thoughts, pulling his attention away from his introspection.
"How much for the strawberries, miss?"
A voice as angelic as a melody peep from beside him. Dazai's eyes widen in surprise, and he stumbles to a halt as a rush of recognition washes over him. The unmistakable scent of your perfume fills the air, and the soothing tone of your voice resonates in his ears. His head slowly turns to the side, and there you are, standing before him, a vision that takes his breath away.
In that moment, Dazai's gaze falls upon your ears, and there it is—a sight that fills him with both wonder and joy, the bell earrings you always wore.
Dangling delicately from your ears, their presence a comforting reassurance that this encounter is more than mere coincidence.
'Sheeps wear bells so their owners can locate them!'
You cast a weary glance at the tall man standing beside you, sensing his intense gaze upon you. "Is something the matter, sir?"
Dazai clears his throat, a mischievous smile tugging at the corners of his lips. "Nope!" he replies, his eyes twinkling with amusement. "Apologies, please carry on."
You nod meekly, redirecting your attention back to the stall owner as they pack the plump strawberries into your basket. Lost in the transaction, you remain oblivious to the tender and affectionate gaze that Dazai bestows upon you, his eyes filled with adoration and warmth.
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