How high does your garden grow?

Frankie Crowne. Middle child. Artisanal pot while you wait. 

[norasharps]

Nora gave a shrug. “Beats me. We’re both going out on a limb here.”

This was all stuff Frankie just had to say. That was the heart of everything, Nora supposed. If they got out all the weird feelings that didn’t fit them anymore, or had settled wrong in their guts until now, where they sat in a hilariously pink car and felt ready to excise them, it was all for the better. Frankie could appreciate something Nora was willing to do for her, and Nora could rise to the challenge of doing it.

???

!!!

Mine?

???

!!!

“I’m sitting down, aren’t I?” Nora mused, once she knew her head hadn’t exploded. Context, context was key. Someone she knew was always yammering about context. Taliesin? “Cool.” She lolled her head sideways to look at Frankie, pushing him out of her brain and hoping her smile wasn’t giving Jack Skellington a run for his money. “Nothing wrong with being honest. Yourself,” she added. “But you know that.”

“My dad was in the backseat. We had a little signal scam going on. The instructor wasn’t looking his way when I was about to make a mistake, so it worked.” They had waited until after she got her passing grade and were out of earshot before whooping and celebrating as if she’d scored the winning touchdown. Her dad had held her and spun them around like she was a little girl again, right there in the RMV lot.

God, she missed him. And her mom. Would that feeling go away, or get worse? “Don’t let 'em scare you,” said Nora. “Just bring backup.”

There was a rule of thumb. She should put that on a bumper sticker.

[frankiecrowne]

Something about the out-on-a-limb image unnerved Frankie. It made her think of her brief but troubling journey into the woods. But she forced herself to shake her head, let the thought slip away like smoke, leaving just the pleasant haze of Nora's admittedly sometimes nervous smile.

She almost couldn't believe she'd said what she'd said. Didn't they always say drunk words were sober thoughts? What were sober words then? Maybe... hope.

"Plenty wrong with being honest in my world." She blinked, remembering where she was, who she was, and maybe, just maybe, who she didn't have to be. "Er... the old world. I used to get away with saying a lot of things if they're in a sleepy tone and followed by a laugh. Doesn't fly anymore. But I guess I've got to know what to say beyond, you know..." Her face was so hot, her cheeks burning. "That thing about you being perfect." Even she knew that was pretty good.

Her smile widened as she listened to Nora's story. "That's so fucking cute. My mom just bribed them like a typical West Ham parent. She needed someone to drive Gusto places. Lucy has a license but let's just say her bribe cost a little more. You know that scene in Clueless where they accidentally end up on the highway? That's Lucia on Main Street."

[norasharps]

Was told. Didn’t have any value. These comments and all implications between the lines filled Nora with not a small amount of anger and commiseration. What kind of environment was that? Nora shifted in her seat, paying equal attention to Frankie’s words and the feelings boiling below every irked drum of her fingers along the window pillar. Support for your siblings at the expense of yourself sounded like a shitty place to be, let alone live in. And somehow it became the air Frankie breathed until now.

“You’re welcome,” Nora said, for lack of anything better to say. This anger at the Crownes was informed unpleasantly by her own, though Nora’s was sourer and more resentful. She and her parents could speak the same language if they tried, but too many people with the same way of talking and the same temper didn’t get far without outside intervention or an apocalyptic swallowing of pride. Frankie’s family probably wouldn’t have noticed anything amiss if this ill-fated field trip hadn’t happened.

That made her sad, so she sat up straighter, catching uncertainty in the air as easily as Felicia caught a fly. “Don’t be sorry,” she added, rousing herself. She didn’t know how to segue from feeling angry on Frankie’s behalf to assuring her that everything she said was worth Nora’s attention, but Nora opted to try anyway. “I like listening to you. You always…” Anything that could be construed as pushing Frankie to behave one way or another made Nora uneasy, who knew better and preferred to step back and let Frankie come to her. She understood the feeling of unmet expectations all too well. “I’m glad I’m here to hear you. I’m glad you offered to drive me home. Sometimes I’m not around or can’t be and I miss out on something interesting from you.”

So she would’ve missed something interesting if she’d gone home in the Jeep… “I’m the farthest thing from perfect, seriously,” Nora insisted, nonetheless cracking a smile at every spiral and swing of Frankie’s as she described Nora in a way unlike anybody else before her. Thank every god there ever was for tonight, because a) she was through being the projectile word vomiter between them and b) now that she got Frankie going, it didn’t seem like she was ever going to stop. Maybe Frankie could talk enough to fill all the empty spaces around her best self like scar tissue. It wouldn’t be perfect or a cure-all, but it’d be something, wouldn’t it? Yeah, it’d be Frankie Crowne—debuting solo act. “And, you know, nobody else is either. They just pretend.” She gave a shrug. “I pretend I didn’t cheat on my driver’s test and now nobody’s around to see me jump curbs. But I still drive. I still try. So should you, with whatever you wanna do.”

[frankiecrowne]

"What am I supposed to say after 'you're welcome'? Con gusto maybe." Frankie let herself laugh. "That doesn't have to do with my brother. It means like, 'with pleasure' or like 'It was pleasant.' " It was funny that Gusto meant that when her brother could be such a deeply unpleasant person.

She sighed, taking in Nora's words. "It's rare for people to... to wait for me. Sometimes I end up counting on getting left behind." It was easier being alone, wasn't it. Wasn't it? But when being not alone, or alone-together, felt like this... well, she could get used to it. Maybe. If she gave herself permission. "So I appreciate you doubling back, I guess. To 'stretch the two-by-four' as Heli would say it." She hadn't even realized Heli knew the term metaphor, even if she had misheard it.

"Agree to disagree. Everyone's perfect is different. You're... you're mine." Her face was on fire. That word, mine, had far more weight than she intended. But she couldn't apologize now. She wouldn't even know how to start. "I'm bad at pretending. Maybe that's the problem." It certainly felt that way around her family.

Then she paused, genuinely confused. "How can you cheat on your driver's test? Those guys like... scare me." She really couldn't think of a more stressful "part of life" experience than backing into a parking space with a man in Coke bottle glasses judging you. It was almost as bad as the dinner they'd just sat through.

Phase: Day Nine

norasharps:

Nora understood. You may not wanna look, but there was always something that could make anybody’s eyes stick to one place like superglue. Even she wasn’t immune—her eyes bore a hole in the dinner table when conversations with her parents shifted to her grades and all annoying disappointment and we expected better of yous therein. Either you stared into the abyss, or you twisted your gaze away and pretended not to notice its mean mugging. (Nora liked the latter.)

She obeyed and duitfully did not answer, though a lot effort went into doing so. Nora drummed her fingers along the car’s window pillar and listened carefully. The same treatment went to her thoughts, brow furrowing as she followed the thread of Frankie’s words. Nora could sing Frankie’s praises all day if she wanted to, albeit badly, but would Frankie hear it? Would she want to hear it? Grinding every ax on the shelf might be the only way for Frankie to feel better about the stuff on her mind.

She nodded along, then supposed aloud, “well, like, just so you know…when I wasn’t prepping for Mock Trial…with your help, remember? Besides that, I did a lot of reading for Anthro.” (Their school actually didn’t have an Anthrology class, but Frankie didn’t need to know about Nora haunting the library after that one auspicious day, somehow sure she would discover that same fizzy, unexpected spark in the place rather than a specific person.) “Community building’s been a thing for a long time. Forever if you can believe it, and as it turns out, not everybody in the community has to, um, contribute. Not directly. They were just there for the vibes.” She hoped Frankie would hear her or at least try to consider what she was saying in the company of unhelpful friends like insecurity and self-doubt. “Other people took care of them. Like, really loved them. There’s skeletons of those who would’ve hard a time making it by themselves against the woolly mammoths or evil cavemen or whatever else was eating neanderthals, but archaelogists found them all buried with stuff and treasure and, like, patched up injuries.” Nora risked a look at Frankie while her attention was fixed on the road. “Not everyone’s gonna show up to the party with the same gift, but you can still bring something. Like a Yankee Swap. You give something and you get something, even if it’s not exactly what you’re expecting.”

“Just a drive is fine with me,” Nora assured her, slinking from one precarious subject to the next much faster than the car was moving. It might not always be this way between her and Frankie, Nora knew, but stumbling from point A to point K was a study in stress. “Do you think we have the same definition of ‘something else’?” She asked bravely. After the dinner they shared, bravery felt like ride on a rollercoaster. “Because it’s okay too, you know. If you don’t. Whatever Frankie I can get, I want.”

"Well I am nothing if not here for the vibes." Frankie chuckled. "Good vibes only, right?" She offered Trip's catch phrase with an easy laugh, but as Nora continued, Frankie's heart went much faster than the car. She felt caught. And called out. And yet... comforted. "That's... Thanks." She bit her lip. "For a long time I thought..." The words were slipping away now. Running away, more like. "I feel like I was told that if I didn't take care of my siblings I didn't have any value. My schoolwork's shit, I don't do extracurriculars. Gusto has more achievements in Overwatch than I have in... anything. So I became like... the support person. Which implies a, like, organized-ness I do not have. If we didn't have the domestic staff I'd be shit out of luck. But they're not expected to be Augusto whisperers. It wouldn't be fair. Anyway. I mean... that means a lot. You talking about... taking the pressure off. Because without the weed... Well, I don't feel like my best self. And my best apparently wasn't super impressive. And hearing that's okay. Better than okay, even... Well, I've never heard it before. So thank you."

Frankie paused. "Shit. I'm talking about my family. Sorry. Feel free to unload any stuff you like. If I haven't already made you super super uncomfortable." She added the last bit too fast but it did need to be said like now.

Or something else. Frankie suddenly pulled to the side of the road even though it was absurd to assume anyone else was driving around at this hour. She realized it was a little comedic, and found the giggles bubbling she could stop them. She fanned her face, wheezing. "It's not you, it's not you, I promise. You're... God..." She leaned forward and put her head on the surprisingly cold leather of the steering wheel. "You're perfect, Nora. And I'm not. And I know you know that I'm not perfect, and it only makes you more perfect. So my 'something else' is that all of me flutters when you touch me. Or smile at me. And I want more of that but I don't wanna fuck anything up even though I have like no experience so I wouldn't even know how to avoid those fuck ups. And I know my survival instinct should be going haywire after that shit show but you have the weirdest way of just like... stopping time. No drugs needed." Frankie slowly turned her head to look at Nora, sheepish and nearly folded in on herself. "Just you."

[frankiecrowne]

norasharps​:

Phase: Day Nine

Nora didn’t want to be the bearer of bad news, but underestimating the Alessis sounded exactly like how the crew of the Pequod fared against a certain whale.

“Good eye.” Nora’s attention had been stuck on the speeches (and her phone).

Trying not to let one idea sway her one way or the other, Nora mulled all of that over for a few minutes. If I can. It was nice seeing Frankie deciding something for herself, even if no decision was made yet. It could be a long road toward realizing what you want, much less getting it, but Nora liked what she was hearing. For once, Frankie was putting Frankie first. “It’s okay not to know,” Nora said finally, encouragingly.

Nora was not someone who had to be agreed with all the time, but Frankie thinking those things about Blair was really doing it for her. “Ooh,” Nora teased in the same tone of voice your class would use when you were called via intercom to the principal’s office. “Say more mean stuff.” ‘Cause I dig it, she didn’t add.

“Wherever is cool,” Nora ventured, not wanting to prolong the night if Frankie didn’t want to and also wanting to stay in her company if Frankie wanted to. Nora shifted in her seat. Staying neutral was much harder than she expected when every attempt at nonchalance ended with her as a boulder in the road instead of a rolling stone in the wind. “If you don’t mind going for a drive with me, I mean,” Nora continued.

“I don’t really like looking at the side of the table or anything it was just... tense or whatever.” And Frankie’s ears tended to perk up when drugs were involved. Which was embarrassing. And troubling. In so many ways. But Frankie had also developed a corner of the eye awareness for Anu in general over time. It helped to know when she or Lucy were making their way through the house.  

“Nah I need to know. Really no better time right? What else am I gonna do, contribute to society?” Frankie let out a very unattractive snort-laugh. “I don’t even know how. Do you know how I was raised? Don’t answer that.” She didn’t want to talk about her parents, and she wanted to talk about Lucy even less after that unfortunate display. “And all the love to Piggy and Heli but they’re more like... ambient community building than, you know, whatever the hell Taliesin was arguing for. Which is weird, to be honest. I didn’t really believe him when he said he was gonna be valedictorian but when he tries... well, he does stupid shit but he’s a go-getter. Who knew.” Sobriety made fools of them all it seemed. “I didn’t even know his mouth could move that fast. But I don’t really pay attention.” 

Frankie felt like her tongue was going a mile a minute, her thoughts speeding from one mooring post to the next, like speedboat pinball. She tried to breathe deep and slow down but all she managed to do was slow the speed of the car. “All my usual summer haunts apparently might have snakes in them?” She was pretty sure that’s what that girl had said. Or maybe she was supposed to look for snakes? “Long story. But I would very much like to go on a drive with you. Metaphorically. We should probably park. But like... not park in like the 1950s urban legend sense. To be clear. That might be a little intense. I’m still kinda...” She adjusted her grip on the wheel trying to get the words out before she lost her nerve. “That kiss was somethin’ else.”

[frankiecrowne]

king-a​:

Phase: Day Eight

Adrian laughed loudly. “For sure. Writing whole ass diary entries to their friends. It makes sense. Gotta use up those characters.” 

“It’s kind of like a sea blue. Different to anything I’ve had before.” That wasn’t a hard thing to achieve though. Adrian had mostly just had a lot of plain and boring until he got to Jules and Bea’s house. They’d let him personalise things but his room at the BnB was definitely the most creative he’d been able to get.

“Facts,” he said, sighing loudly. “I thought I already knew a lot about life but this whole deal makes me think I don’t really know anything.” 

“Seems like it would mess with the flow of conversation though. Like what if they say something messed up in paragraph one. Then you’re supposed to talk about the weather and the crops and shit in paragraph three? Hell no.” Frankie tugged at the grass a little self consciously. That was a more intense reaction than she was used to having, especially when ye olden hypothetical times. Ever since she’d gone cold turkey her emotions had felt so very loud. Maybe that was what was hurting her head. 

She took a deep breath imagining the color of the paint. Diving into it really. An eternity of blue. “That sounds nice.” she said finally. “If a little deep.” But as long as you don’t add a photorealistic shark on there you’ll be fine.” This was why she didn’t like wall art in general. That shit could move if you tried the wrong strain. She’d gotten attacked by one of August’s weird anime guys once before she realized what the hell was going on. 

“No one knows anything, Mr. King. Anyone who says they do is selling something.” Frankie should know. Her parents did it all the time. I can promise you we’ll take him for everything he has. If everything isn’t in off shore accounts. Or in his mistress’s apartment.  “So what’s in the bag?” She pawed at the care package gently. Reverently even. He really was unnecessarily nice. But he’d always been that way. 

[frankiecrowne]

norasharps​:

Phase: Day Nine

Was Nora imagining things, or was Frankie feeling as paranoid as she was? Nora had begrudgingly accepted much of the darkness around Tony was a shadow play and a band of misleadingly shaped puppets…well, until tonight. She was left wondering if she and Frankie were the only ones who’d take him as what he was now—a threat.

“Can’t he?” Nora asked, not really sure if she wanted an answer.

Nora did not like to think about her supply. She was still hovering around the three month mark, but she was starting to think she should’ve picked Personal Finance instead Woodworking, because the books were starting to appear lopsided. Trading favors was good for Sharpware, but not necessarily good for things with Tony.

Who cared about her Adderall supply? Frankie was officially in recovery. “So you decided, huh?” Their conversation about sobriety seemed like a thousand years ago. “Right time and opportunity?” It was important Nora didn’t sound like she favored one—this was Frankie’s decision and she’d respect it. “Does it feel…okay? Do you?”

“Boo hoo, the pot’s gone, whatever will we do?” Nora gave an exaggerated shrug. The less attention that was heaped on Frankie, the better. “They can go after Eminem for all I care. Blair,” she added, in case Frankie didn’t know or remember Nora’s need to insult Blair Jha even when he wasn’t around to hear it—for Sasha’s sake, of course.

“I don’t mind us staying away.” Nora watched the dashboard light up. “For a while.”

Too soon for an ‘us’? That Nora did want to know, and so sat in silent anticipation.

But not expectation, she told herself sternly.

Frankie wrinkled her nose. “I don’t think he can. That’s a lot of effort, anyway. And have you seen those boys? They’re allergic to effort. Anu’s different, but I doubt Anu cares about that stuff.” Frankie hoped she had a little armor on Anu’s side thanks to Lucy. But that would involve Lucy paying attention. “She looked real annoyed about Finn taking the drug store apart.” 

She whistled. Nora was asking the hard questions. Or maybe they just felt like they were hard.  “Yeah. Yeah. Yeahhhhhh. Well. Hand forced. Supplies. Maybe... I dunno. Plenty of people can be, you know, recreational. So maybe. If I can do that. Eventually. But it’s not really the time to be out of it. As much as I want to be out of it.” It was so simple when she said it that way. Casual. Maybe she could be like Piggy. Only smoking on Thursdays. “I gotta prove that I can do it, you know? Don’t wanna be one of those people who’s like ‘I can quit any time I want.’ “

Frankie’s giggle was easy and long, even shaking the steering wheel a little. “His hair is really bad. But I think he does it to match Jacks. Whose hair is also bad. This is what happens when you split a box of hair dye instead of buying your own.” Wow Frankie really was getting mean. But maybe she deserved a little meanness. Her mom was mean. Lucy was mean. Augusto was too. Maybe it was time to give in. Just a tiny bit. 

“Staying away sounds great.” Frankie’s cheeks were tight. She felt like her smile was spreading across her face like she was the freaking Joker. Chill, Frank. Chill. She stared out into the dark. “Am I taking you to Sharpware or...” There was so much in that ellipsis. 

[frankiecrowne]

rothmia​:

Phase: Day Eight

“Oh, that’s good to know.” Lately Mia felt like Frankie was avoiding her. Little dots of yellow were springing back. Hope. Fickle, fragile, almost impossible to see hope. “I want your attention to. You have my favorite perspective.” She laughed, a tiny dash of artist humor.

She pulled herself into a seated position, taking in Frankie’s tired eyes and the tugging of her lips, pulling ever downwards. Piggy was Trip…she vaguely remembered that. She definitely knew all about their Thursday plans. But Augusto causing trouble was…not new but this was different. Smudges of grey and brown where you expected orange and red. Some new undefined resentment.

Before she even had time to comment on it, Frankie was moving on to Lucy. But even that was over faster than she could take in fully. She blinked. “Whoa, slow down. We have all afternoon.”

She touched Frankie’s shoulder softly. “I didn’t entirely catch that last train, I’m still on the station, but from where I’m sitting it sounds like Augusto is just upset that there’s someone else that matters to you.” She didn’t want to understand that, but she sort of did. “It’s going to take time for him to realize that you’re someone with your own passions and hobbies and friends. The more time you spend away from him, the easier it can be for him to see it.”

Her fingers fell away from Frankie’s skin, trailing into the dirt. “As for Lucy, I think she’ll be okay. She only keeps the best parts of reality.” Mia’s fingers landed softly in the dirt. She traced out abstract patterns as she talked. “They’ll all be fine because you taught them how to be. You’re the best teacher around, nurturing things and watching them grow. It’s a true skill.”

As for her and Adam….”I don’t have stories, really,” Slashes of paint, jumbled and muddied from too much color spread too thin, “Adam’s having a difficult time and I….” she laughed, “was too high to realize it. Oops. So, now I’m trying to help him turn things around. If they can be. We might be hitchiking through friends right now.”

“Aw shit.” Frankie said, face really flushing now. “I like how you see too. I mean, I don’t know how you see because who knows anything in this wild world right? But you are just effortless good vibes, Me. I aspire.” She was slowly learning that a lot of her easy going nature had been about the world being easy. Or not mattering. But with all this going on and no way to tune out, it was hard.

Was she talking fast? Frankie never talked fast. Her dad teased her about it. Used to, she meant. A pang of loss sounded inside her. “Sorry. Consider me a foot.” She offered a perfect echo of the subway. “Please stand clear. The doors are close-inggg.” She paused, trying to parse her own life (which she didn’t do much, to be honest.) “Trip came by to buy before the Trip.” She hiccup-giggled for a second. “Gusto got mad that he was even there, and then when Trip said we were friends he lost his shit.” She paused. “So yeah. You’re right. Like usual. How do you pay attention so well? Wait.” She paused, realizing the implication in the question might not be true. “When did you run out? Did you run out?” 

Frankie groaned in acknowledgment. Mia was right. Lucy made her own world and only accepted what she wanted to accept. Her cheeks flushed. “Damn, Me. I dunno about all that. Detail orientation isn’t exactly a family trait.”

“Hitchhiking through friends. That’s a good one.” Frankie paused. “What does it mean?” She didn’t really have to ask what Adam being difficult meant. A not too small percentage of her bonding with Mia was their temperamental brothers. They were different but only just. Adam was like the successful version of Augusto. Mostly.

[frankiecrowne]

lucecrowne​:

Phase: Day Seven

Lucy’s eyes widened. She’d never even considered that. “Frannie, you’re a genius.” She kissed her sister’s cheek, “Of course we split the vote. We’re the most alluring people up there obvio.” She could already feel the tattered threads of her confidence sewing themselves back together. “When I show them that I’m the one that’s really in charge of what they like, they’ll all lift me up as an unofficial ruler of sorts.” She nodded her head. It would be perfect. Anu would have the throne, but Lucy would have her own kind of power. “Thank you.”

She rolled her eyes. This was one point that Francesca was just too unwilling to see. There was nothing for it. Lucy could scream until she was blue in the face but that wouldn’t change her sister’s need to defend him. “Of course they are.” She looked around them slowly before leaning in to whisper, “You know what their families do, don’t you? It’s like Taylor Swift says the rumors are terrible and cruel but most of them are true.”

it didn’t bother her. She was her mother’s daughter. She knew that if she needed to navigate a difficult situation, she would come out on top. She could treat them all like her besties and still be waiting for the knife to drop. It just made sense. “That’s why I don’t run around defending them unless they really need it. Who can say who’s telling the truth and who isn’t? I just know which people are worth protecting.”

Lucy stared down at her manicure. “I suppose I could start by roughing my fingers up a little bit. Maybe go for that casually tossed together style. It would be a change but it would let people know that I’m not perfect, I’m flawless in a messy way.”

“Obvio.” Frankie echoed, as if it was. “I mean, you were already kinda the official ruler before so.” On the worst night of Frankie’s life, but that was her own affair. “That could work.”

“Shit Luce.” That was way more lucid than Frankie ever was. Up was down and down was up. At this rate, Gusto  would be getting Mr. Congeniality. “All of them?” She got the Alessis sure. But Laila’s parents were... well, she didn’t know what Laila’s parents did. But their parents were divorce attorneys. She couldn’t help but picture her father, his smirk hidden by a newspaper. Misery and strife pays for this house, Fran dear. “But we’re not our parents.” Frankie certainly didn’t want to be. And Frankie had met Trip’s dad once. They were like Jaws and Dude, Where’s My Car? 

Maybe Frankie should have felt better for being one of the ones worth protecting. If she really was. “I guess that’s... pragmatic.” Frankie had never been pragmatic in her life. 

Frankie was struggling to imagine Lucy in any degree of disarray. “You should do what makes you comfortable. It’s not about how you look, it’s about how you, you know, talk to people. Take an interest. You might not want to save them or whatever but if people think you’re listening they remember.” God, this was going to go terribly. Either her sister would get offended, or she’d be unleashing Lucy on an unprepared populace. 

[frankiecrowne]

norasharps​:

Phase: Day Nine

“Great!” Dial it back. “Great,” Nora repeated, not as loudly. She’d spooked Frankie before. Nora didn’t want to do that again. “It’ll be candid, so don’t think about it. Or try not to overthink about it. You’ll get points for effort. Participation grades matter.”

That was a tad New Age-y. Or Poison Ivy-like. Oh, don’t go down that road.

Nora sat down in the offered seat, managing to keep a very goofy smile inside by the skin of her teeth. Good. She was doing good. Totally normal and not weird at all. “I really hope you and I are there if he does it again. We need to record it for posterity.” Heli Hulking out on Tony would probably be the coolest thing Nora would see in her entire life. Then she’d make sure Heli was okay, though, like you’d do for a werewolf friend after a full moon. Somebody had to collect your platform shoes, right? 

“We’re in the same boat there.” Nora shrugged, then thought about it, which was what she should’ve probably done first. “Oh, yeah. Well…um, shit happens.” Nora still didn’t know how she felt about the dinner truth bombs. Or lie bombs. A lot of bombs were dropped earlier. But Nora didn’t know if she or Frankie were equipped to sort through the wreckage. “Maybe it will just blow over?” She didn’t think so, though.

“I’m pretty good at candid. Cause I don’t catch on quick.” All her favorite pictures of her were candids. Particularly the ones where she didn’t know they were happening until a second before. 

Frankie knew Nora had good intentions, but the thought of Heli confronting Tony made her nervous. She hadn’t know her long, but deep down, she worried that Heli had a little bit of Lucy in her. She didn’t seem to know how to lose, which made the loss all the more upsetting for her when it happened. “I don’t think anyone should be going back there, to be honest. I’d say the people who actually wanted to be in that room after he did his thing was about 60-40. There’s no harm in staying away. He can’t summon us.” She added. “You and I don’t even have stuff to sell. Unless you do. Which I’m not asking about. Because I’m in recovery.” She finished quickly. “I’m just fresh out so my clients, er, ex-clients are not happy.”

She swallowed. “I don’t think it will blow over unless we find some storm shelters and stay away. To stretch the metaphor like Laffy Taffy.” To reiterate her point, she clicked her seatbelt and started the car.

[frankiecrowne]

king-a​:

Phase: Day Eight

Adrian shook his head. “Now that would be fucked up.” He laughed. “What if we started writing letters ‘n shit. It’s weird having no internet but could be worse.” 

“You’ve got this,” he said matter-of-factly. Adrian decided to leave it there. If she needed any support or help he would be there. He could probably text to check in over the next few days just in case. 

Adrian could tell he didn’t get her whole family deal. Which was something he was kind of used to. A lot of people didn’t get his. Didn’t understand why he would want to be a guardian to two kids at eighteen. But it wasn’t for other people to understand. Frankie’s wasn’t for him to. 

He smiled. “First one. My bedroom walls, mostly.” He thought about that for a second. “Yeah you’re probably right,” he said. There was something about having shit to do that made the things you wanted to do more satisfying. Even if it was boring, mundane shit that you always wanted to be over. “No school. No jobs. No parents telling us what to do. Didn’t realise how much that shit could make the other stuff better.”

Frankie mimed using a long feathery quill pen. “ ‘My dearest Adrian. Sup?’ “ And then three days later you reply with ‘Not much, you?’. Very ineffecient. That must be why all those old fashioned letters are so long.” 

Frankie didn’t have this but Adrian was very nice to say so. Everyone was being so nice. Had so many people always been this nice? Had she just never noticed before?

“Oooh what color?” Heli had offered to make up Frankie’s room anyway she wanted in Trip’s house using what she often accidentally called ‘interior resign,’ but that would involve actually picking a room. Frankie was bad at sleeping inside at the best of times. Sleeping in someone else’s cavernous already over ‘interior resigned’ house was something else. 

She sighed at Adrian’s painfully true observation. “Maybe it’s the contrast. Maybe it just distracts from the other little inconveniences that are now so glaringly obvious.” Frankie had thought she was pretty independent and didn’t ask much of her family’s staff but she was struggling in her own way. At least Heli had a tendency to take care of the cleaning basics on instinct. She had already asked for lessons. If Heli could remember to do it, maybe her mary jane addled brain could do it too. “You don’t realize how much stuff goes into making other stuff happen, you know?”

[frankiecrowne]

rothmia​:

Phase: Day Eight

“I know.” They’d spent hours in the grass before. Usually high. Frankie was almost always high. Mia did it in fits and starts. It depended on how much sensory information she wanted. Right now, she was pretty okay with sobriety. Reality was surreal enough. 

“I hope they’re off eating in empty houses. Can you image the feasts?” She saw the giant food in her head and the swirls of scent trails around it. Wherever they were, they were probably happy. She liked that. 

A travel kit? Mia hadn’t thought of that. She wasn’t sure about lugging around something heavy. Easel’s were a nightmare to carry. It wasn’t always practical to paint something. The supplies were endless. But maybe she could add more oil crayons or something to her bag? That would give her more range. “I’ll have to see what I can find.” She’d always bought supplies in New York. This would be a novel experience. “And I’m happy for you.” She turned to smile at Frankie. “If attention is something you want to give to people, I’m always happy to receive it.” 

This wasn’t the kind of attention that Mia had expected. Family problems were…well, complicated. Greys and purples so intertwined it was hard to see where the colors started and stopped. “You go first.” 

“Huh.” Frankie hadn’t considered the food fallout of all of these empty houses. Perhaps she should have been concerned, but that was nature, wasn’t it. “Yeah. Good for them.” She didn’t mean to sound like Lucille Bluth but she definitely did. It didn’t help that her dad’s mom definitely sounded like her. 

Frankie smiled back, but then she turned her eyes on the sky to avoid being awkward. “You deserve it, Mia. More attention I mean. If you want it. I tend to not want it. From other people. Not you.” She wante dto say ‘never you,’ but it wasn’t quite true. Just the thought made the blood rush to her cheeks in embarassment. 

“You don’t have to say anything you want to. Promise. It’s just... Gusto is being super weird for no reason. He got really mad at Piggy, I mean, Trip for just I dunno... existing in my vicinity?” He’d been upset before Trip had said what he’d said. She was pretty sure of that. Either way, it wasn’t his business. “And he’s gotten more and more squirrelly. I think it’s this Noah stuff.” She paused. “I realize this isn’t an entertaining story. Here’s one better. Lucy’s decided she’s going to work on being easy going and non-threatening. Because she lost the election.” She paused again. “Fuck. I’m being mean, aren’t I? I’m sorry. I’m terrible at good vibes now. Maybe I was always mean. God. Gross. I’m sorry.” 

[wewerechildrenwerenotnow]

Families of West Ham

[frankiecrowne]

lucecrowne​:

Phase: Day Seven

“Nevertheless, I’m a real diamond not some swarovski crystal. I can handle the pressure, I won’t break at all.” She felt her resolve hardening already. She was going to make the people love her. They wouldn’t have a choice at all. And when she was standing over them, being the queen they never knew they wanted, she would know peace. 

Maybe her sister was right. You couldn’t always account for taste, but you could see how intimidation might lead to unforseeable consequences. “I can’t believe that my bestie’s confidence cost me a seat and not her. How inconsiderate.” They’d be talking about that later, “But thank you for pointing it out, Frannie dearest, now I know what needs to happen. I need to show people how easy going and unthreatening I am.” 

Soft? Trip? “Don’t take this the wrong way, but I think your weed-induced friendship may be coloring your perspective here. He’s a snake, like the rest of them. A harmless one, but a snake nonetheless.” Francesca should really be rid of him. 

She sighed. It sounded like a great deal of work to pretend that she had lower standards than she did. It also sounded distasteful, but she would do what she must. “I will work on it. I promise you that.” 

“I know.” Frankie said, doing her best to look like she did. Lucy was a weird kind of teflon, like the Road Runner if he never even acknowledged Wile E. In general, Frankie preferred it that way. The world could be hard for people like Lucy. She really didn’t want anyone to dim her sister’s light. 

Frankie looked left and right to check if someone was listening. As if they weren’t already in private. “Yeah I think that may have been a general Alessi vote rather than an Anu one. Between you and me. People like parties. I dunno what the Fern stuff is gonna do, but I think you and Anu and Reg might have, um, divided the vote?” Was that what their dad called it? It sounded right. “People don’t really understand how popularity works, Luce. They forget that they, um...” now it was time for a little lie. But only a little one. “...elected you to it. You’re the nicest one of them, really.” That was true. Of the girls anyway. She was biased when it came to Trip. And Laila just kind of... gave her the heebie-jeebies. She couldn’t really explain it. But no one was that nice and was friends with Anu. Not without being bad at paying attention the way Lucy was. 

“He’s not a snake.” She said, with more certainty than she probably should have. She was sick of her siblings having opinions about her friends. She knew that at least, but she hadn’t meant to be that aggressive. She never meant to be aggressive at all. “You really think all your friends are snakes?” It wasn’t that Frankie didn’t believe her. It was more that she was confused that Lucy realized it. It was like the world was turning on its axis. 

“I know you will, Luce. I know.” 

[brennanwilkinson]

frankiecrowne​:

Phase: Day Six

“And you’re kinda a misanthrope. Is that the word?” Frankie felt like she’d heard that in English class at some point. Or her father leveling it at her brother. Perhaps that made more sense. 

She couldn’t help but go through all the Trip and Heli incorrect versions of it before being sure. Mysterium, Misalignment, Misantelope. But then she was sure. “Yes I think it is. No judgment, but like, you’re kind of trapped with people now, so I wish you luck with both acquiring drugs and your general life philosophy.” She laughed softly to herself. She didn’t need pot to be deep. “See you around, Bren from New York.” And off she pedaled, on and on into an uncertain future. 

“Probably.” He wasn’t sure he’d heard it before, but it felt like it fit. Some person who hated something. There was more than enough to hate in West Ham. It was just that kind of place. 

“Thanks?” It felt like a judgement. “You too. Not the drugs part, good luck on sobriety. And your philosophy.” Chicken and kisses was just a baffling concept. It was gonna take him some time to wrap his head around that one. “See ya.” 

(the end)

[wewerechildrenwerenotnow]

For Ryann - for the three year anniversary 

[frankiecrowne]

king-a​:

Phase: Day Eight

Adrian thought about it. “Yeah you’re right,” he said. Was that weird? It was kinda weird. He wondered if that was part of being stuck here. Maybe this was some kind of fucked up prison and people could control the weather now. Fuck. He hoped they found a way out of here soon.

“It’s worth talking to her.” He pulled out his phone and text Frankie her number. “I hope she can do something to make it easier for you. Shouldn’t have to just tough it out if you can do something to make it better.”

“I’m sorry,” Adrian said. Frankie had responsibility she didn’t want. And Adrian wanted it more than anything, and he couldn’t have it. “If you can’t ask your family, then ask your friends. Or just have like, code words or something so you don’t have to words properly. Emojis are good for that.” 

He shook his head and sighed. “I’ve been doing some painting at the BnB but that’s almost done.” Adrian wasn’t really sure what would come next. “Need to figure something out. There’s only so much drawing and painting a person can do.” 

Frankie took solace in the happy blip that came from her phone. “At least there’s service. Can you imagine if we had to like come over here and yell out ‘hey I’m gonna be at Midnight Ride from 10 -12:30 and then I’m gonna pick up stuff from the Dairy’?” The idea of publicizing her official move away from the Crowne house was all too much.

She waved the screen briefly to indicate she’d gotten the number. “Thanks.” Admitting she needed a doctor was an important step. Probably. Maybe. “I don’t think I’ve ever toughed anything in my life so I don’t want to start now.”

Frankie ran her hands through the grass, keeping her eyes down. “It doesn’t really work like that. We have to keep this stuff in the family.” If her mother or even Lucy ever heard her talking about August, let alone complaining about him to outsiders, she’d be in serious trouble. That had been part of the problem with him meeting Piggy. They had no reason to know each other. 

“Oh cool.” Frankie said, taking the opportunity to move on. “Painting like...” She gestured to mime using a wide brush like Tom Sawyer’s friends painting a fence. “Or...?” She stuck her tongue out the corner of her mouth and mimicked a delicate Bob Ross brushstroke. Then she shrugged. “I can’t believe I’m saying this, but maybe we’re all exhausted on leisure. Well, maybe not all.” If her living accommodations were any indication, certain leisurely pastimes were always going to hold their appeal for those so inclined. 

[frankiecrowne]

lucecrowne​:

Phase: Day Seven

“I’m the eldest. It’s my responsibility to be more put together than the rest of you. If I tell you everything, then you’ll lose some of that shine that makes me your older sister.” It wasn’t magic, but it felt like it sometimes. She valued the way that August and Frankie looked up to her. She didn’t want to lose it by revealing what went on underneath. 

Her nose wrinkled at the mention of Frannie’s unfortunate habit. She was grateful that her sister was giving up, but the power it gave her was strange. Frannie deserved to be popular on her own merit. Not for what she could give others. “I try to see the good in everyone, but it does test me when they aren’t doing the same.” Her eyes darted around the room. “I thought that everyone liked me. I’m very likeable. And I’m nice to everyone. Always.” 

Lucy followed her sister’s eyeline. Trip? He was famous for reasons that Francesca didn’t need to know about. Ever. He was a bad partner, totally unsuitable. But she couldn’t dispute her point without mentioning it. Her sister had put her in a pickle. “I don’t have the interest in cultivating my popularity through the same means, but thank you for the thought. You’re very kind.” 

“You’re always shiny, Lucia.” Frankie used their mom’s name pointedly. She knew it would make Lucy happy and it cost her nothing. “You don’t have to hide your struggles to be that way.” She wasn’t ever going to demand that Lucy do that. That was the kind of thing August did. 

Well Lucy’s just stood right about the third rail, hadn’t she? How do you tell the Homecoming Queen that not everyone voted for her?  “You’re very likeable. But people are insecure. Or they don’t look close. They just see cheerleader and Anu and, uh, run?” God this was about to go bad. But maybe it was time for Lucy to know. “Glamorous people are intimidating and stuff.” 

Frankie’s eyes widened as she realized what Lucy thought she meant. “Whoa. Whoa. No. Not that. Uh, I mean, showing your softer side.” But then she remembered that saying Trip was showing anything might have been the wrong call. He could be... very public? “Or, I guess, be okay with being a little less perfect. You need to fake imperfection, I mean.” she added quickly. She didn’t want to lose Lucy completely.