Theon Apologist

22 | he/him | gay + trans might write fanfiction the only normal game of throne/asoiaf fan DNI if ur a minor or support incest/pedophilic ships

[freetheon]

so i run an asoiaf themed d&d campaign thats set 200 years after the main story and most of my players are not familiar with the story of asoiaf or even game of thrones and its very funny to see them accidentally do exact plot lines almost verbatim from the books. oh youre a cleric of the lord of light and you asked me if it was possible for him to revive you if you die? interesting :) youre a once-honorable knight whose king died on your watch and now youre trying to find a new ruler to follow? brilliant. tell me more.

[saessenach]

“You are dead,” Dany said.

Murdered. Though his lips never moved, somehow she could hear his voice, whispering in her ear. You never mourned me, sister. It is hard to die unmourned.

“I loved you once.”

Daenerys and Viserys in A Dance with Dragons, Dany X for the lovely @hylialeia 🫶 Happy mid-November once again Leia ✨✨✨

[knightsickness]

am i remembering wrong or is there a bit in affc when cersei’s like loras and margaery are both very pretty (derisive) and seem very close. a little suspiciously close for siblings actually. you could almost think they were twins. i’ve seen this shit before i’ve got your number you teenage deviants. insane self-report woman who has never seen siblings like each other non-incestuously

[visenyaism]

i cant believe bloodraven, the man responsible for everything bad, would do this

[amber-laughs]

agot is so hard if you’re a jon snow understander because it’s just “adults in my life abuse me and i feel unwanted, unloved and unfit to live. i’m treated as a second class citizen even by those who have no standing at all even though i deserve it for the crime of Being Born Against My Will. i am my father’s greatest shame and he has rightfully sentenced me to life imprisonment but i shall always yearn for his undeserved love like the greedy bastard they all say i am” and everyone around him just says “awww you gonna cry now you little bitch?” and then BOOM! some girl on twitter is writing an 18 tweet thread about how he’s ungrateful that catelyn didn’t make him sleep in the dungeons and feed him only dog food or something

[jeyneofpoole]

asoiaf character you'd like to be tumblr mutuals with? asoiaf character you'd have beef with on tumblr?

it’s already been said but wylla manderly is basically already on tumblr and she would be the coolest mutual that i could ever have. also sansa would do the justgirlythings bit including the lesbian part and i eat that shit up. i would have beef with selyse’s tradcath r’hollor blog who blazes her 5 note posts religiously (all 5 notes are mel on separate accounts it’s a mating ritual.) also if mance was a real person and he was in a band i would have to blacklist the tag because the people on here would make so much old man yaoi between him (lead singer) and the drummer (qhorin) i would have blood feuds with people posting untagged mancexreader fic on MY dash in the year of our seven 298 AC

[daenystheedreamer]

theon former tumblr user who left in the 2017 porn ban. posted pro ana heroin chic selfies and reblogged gay& milf porn. and he's thee most blocked tumblr user ever<3 did several sixpenceeee style scams and like sixpenceeee accidentally reveals the fact his parents have indentured servants and he's like its literally our culture???

[freetheon]

finally got physical copies of the books so i can actually READ them instead of listening to the audiobooks and it does give me more of an appreciation for how much the lannisters call each other "sweet brother/sister" theyre kinda cunty for that

[visenyaism]

🌻 jonquils Follow

NEED dick from a pathetic failknight who just lost all of his tilts

beneaththegold-deactivated12600

ugh this drought fucking sucks. maybe if we didn’t have a one-eyed k*nslaying freak in charge of the whole realm instead of an actual *rightful* king our ill luck might turn and we could actually enjoy the long summer.

⚔️ princebreakbeds Follow

it’s sooooo nasty seeing black//fyre supporters on the dash you KNOW they just hated King Daeron because he was neurodivergent

👁️ hedgeknightplumm Follow

FYI OP fought for the black dragon and took the lives of three loyal kingsmen at the redgrass field

beneaththegold-deactivated12600

oh so you support K*NSLAYING???

⚔️ princebreakbeds Follow

LMAO LORD RIVERS GOT HIS ASS

⚡️stormylands Follow

DNI if you support the d*rnish takeover of court

💫 webringthedawn Follow

L+ratio+it’s SEVEN kingdoms+unbowed+unbent+unbroken

🫧 seastarred Follow

“is prince maekar a DILF” the greatest thread in inn at the crossroads history, closed after 826292 pages of heated debate

🍒 tridenttrout Follow

seven hells y’all would fuck a k*nslayer if they were valyrian huh

shipbreakerslay-deactivated126490

you literally have bl**draven supporter in bio????

🐉 rhaenyra-did-nothing-wrong Follow

friendly reminder that dragons**d is a slur and only real valyrians should reclaim!!!!!

🥧 dragonstoner Follow

girl at this point we could ALL be aegon the unworthy’s bastards come on now🙄

💐 moondoored Follow

bracken son or blackwood daughter

[visenyaism]

🌆 bowlofbrown-deactivated1260383

ugh i have NOT been able to sleep good lately cause im getting kept up by really weird dreams. i swear every night it’s just the same damn comet and weird ice creatures and some fucking bald girl crawling out of a fire with a dragon. anyone know if mercury is in retrograde or something what’s going ON

👁️ hedgeknightplumm Follow

yeah this could be a sign that you have ADHD. what do you know about your father though that’s important to this

🌆 bowlofbrown-deactivated1260383

fuck off weirdo i never even met the man. not like there’s any shortage bums in flea bottom though.

👁️ hedgeknightplumm Follow

sounds about right. check DMs

💀 bitterreal Follow

wait check OPs carrd. 28+blonde in picrew+flea bottom resident+freaky dreams. OP is a fucking dragonseed do NOT open that message don’t do it

😈 winteriscoming Follow

imagine admitting to being a dragonseed on bloodraven’s internet. rip bozo you’re on dragon madnesswatch

🍇 arborgold Follow

she black on my fyre til i bear that sword

🍏 sevenhellz Follow

she break on my spear til i maek ‘ar anvil

🍑 crossbowthey Follow

she turn on my cloak til i am forcibly exiled to essos

🐁 thousandeyes

if you’re going to commit treason on the fucking tumblr dashboard can it at least be funny🙄

🦓 zorse-deactivated12608362

ugh fine. she tar on my garyen til i fuck my sister

🫦 lannispwhort Follow

prince aerion should’ve at least told us what it tasted like before he died that’s just fucking rude otherwise

#would still hit though. who said that

[jeyneofpoole]

lyanna (after lehmann’s ophelia)

[a0random0gal]

Saddest quote in Asoiaf?

"I should have been with him. Where was I? I should have died with him."

"No don't cut my hair, Ned loves my hair."

"Egg, I dreamed I was old"

"D'you remember that cave? We should have stayed in that cave. I told you so."

He brought his doom onto himself with his treason, but I did love him Davos.

"I am your son, I have always been your son."

"Theon wondered what it would be like, to have a home"

others

Voting ended onSep 30, 2023

[jeyneofpoole]

the unequal marriage (after pukirev)

[jeyneofpoole]

the krakens daughter

[jeyneofpoole]

@sometimes-petty congrats this is the funniest thing anybody’s ever said about my art

[melrosing]

template for my new asoiaf art meme! have separated into four parts so it’s not so unwieldy as the last but as ever if you’re using feel free to edit as you please to make it work for you x

[jeyneofpoole]

at the end of the day i think the reason we’re all so obsessed w jon snow in the books is the inherent comedy of the Chosen One being sent to magical boarding school and just hating every minute of it. he’s not realizing his full magical girl potential he’s just exhausted. mans is TIRED. there’s a literal giant camping out in his front yard and he’s stressing over salt beef. there is an uber hot magical witch actively trying to seduce him and he’s just like ‘omg ygritte had red hair… im going to kms’. he is actively becoming a wolf. like straight up animorphing into his pet dog. and he doesn’t give a shit he’s like ‘hm that’s weird’ and then he gets distracted smelling satins’ hair again. easily the most character of all time. god.

[asharaxofstarfall]

renly gotta be my favourite pov trap character. something about brienne convincing herself that she loves him while only actually loving the idea of him she creates in her head after having exactly one interaction with him as kids. the fact that we're told that he likes having her around (despite looking down on her) because unlike everyone else, she doesn't want his money or his political power, she just wants to die for him. loving his public persona but not him because she doesn't know him . loras actually being in love with him but idolising him because how could he hate his dead boyfriend that he feels like he murdered? never being able to accept his flaws and completely worshipping him because they grew up together. all of the bad things that he does stemming from that relationship that they had. being the only person that truly loved him while also being the only person that cannot openly grieve his death. stannis saying that he loved the boy renly was and not the man he became while never admitting responsibility for his part in the way he turned out because that means admitting that he left his baby brother and didnt act on the responsibilities he had to his family. the idea that if stannis hadn't abandoned him, renly could have been a much happier, more stable person contradicting the fact that staying with stannis after the war probably still would have created issues for him because growing up in a house where your main parental figure does not accept or confront the trauma you both faced would have only made him worse. oh i'm so normal about him

[freetheon]

somebody makes a post about seeing dany conquering westeros as an invasion. and i reblog it 👍

i find out that person only dislikes dany because they want jon and sansa to get together. so i delete the reblog 👍

[jeyneofpoole]

i will be right beside you