Fresh is back @freshisback - Tumblr Blog

sunbathe

phuckindope

‘♡

“Yo the cops are here”

"Oh What?!”

#bone #bizzy #reaction

royalharkinian

If we’re all going down I'm going the way I lived, making shitty memes in the face of peril.

freshisback

As devout and high-ranking shit poster this definitely got me feeling feelins

#reblogs #real life shit #smash #memes #tumblr

PowerShell to query networked SCCM DB via SQL for user affinity (like last loggedonuser but better) by hostname

Kinda WTF at me posting this here but I don’t do social media and I’m not sure where else is appropriate - I spent DAYS looking for this but since I couldn’t find it I had to do it myself: tested in SCCM 2016 (i think) and PowerShell 5-something

The pre-requisite is that the account that is used to launch the Powershell session to execute this has been granted appropriate access to the Database. I had problems trying to properly test this in Visual Studio Code because of this, though it was fine in PS-ISE

# Hostname to search for (TEST)

$HOSTNAME = “REPLACE_WITH_TEST_HOSTNAME”

# Define SQL server connection variables

$FORMATTED_SQL_QUERY = "select v_UserMachineRelationship.MachineResourceName, User_DISC.Full_User_Name0, User_DISC.User_Name0 from v_UserMachineRelationship INNER JOIN User_DISC on v_UserMachineRelationship.UniqueUserName = User_DISC.Unique_User_Name0 where `"MachineResourceName`" = '" + $HOSTNAME + "'"

$SQL_server = “SQL_SERVER_NAME”

$SQL_database = “SCCM_DB_NAME”

write-host -ForegroundColor Green -BackgroundColor Black "Querying...." -NoNewline

$SQL_Connection = New-Object System.Data.SqlClient.SqlConnection

$SQL_Connection.ConnectionString = "Server=$SQL_server;Database=$SQL_database;Integrated Security=True"

$SQL_Command = New-Object System.Data.SqlClient.SqlCommand

$SQL_Command.CommandText = $FORMATTED_SQL_QUERY

$SQL_Command.Connection = $SQL_Connection

$SQL_Connection.Open()

$SQL_Adapter = New-Object System.Data.SqlClient.SqlDataAdapter

$SQL_Adapter.SelectCommand = $SQL_Command

$Retrieved_Data = New-Object System.Data.Datatable

$Records_Returned = $SQL_Adapter.fill($Retrieved_Data)

$SQL_Connection.close()

write-host -ForegroundColor Green "`tCompleted!`n`nUser(s) associated with $hostname is:"

# This is the iterator, for stepping through the results when we (potentially) return more than one user

if ($Records_Returned - 1) {

$index = 0

For ($Index;$Index -lt $Records_Returned; $Index++) {

write-host -ForegroundColor red $Retrieved_Data.Full_User_Name0[$index]

}

else {

write-host -ForegroundColor red $Retrieved_Data.Full_User_Name0

}

Also the returned object has 3 properties:

MachineResourceName which is the hostname you searched for

Full_User_Name0 which is an analog for DisplayName

UniqueUserName which is the domain and user in “domain\user” format

#wtf #powershell #sccm #sql #real life shit

Jigokuraku 28 - finally getting around to explaining some of the backstory

#jigokuraku #manga #weeb

Hmmm

I can’t tell if the awkward tension in the back of this Uber is because I made the guy sit outside the weedmart while I shopped and he got annoyed I took too loong - OR - if it’s because he thought he could probably stealth squeeze out a fart and I came back to him hotboxing his car with asshole fumes because I came back too early.

Shine on you stinky diamond

#real life shit #asshole fumes #uber #cabs #weed

At least this one seems like its self-aware enough to be a parody

#what #random #WSHH #hiphop #SMDH

liquidfem

boostergold78

I didn’t know Mr. T pityed fool’s that weren’t woke, but that’s awesome. #respect

lordxeras

“I think about my father being called ‘boy’, my uncle being called ‘boy’, my brother, coming back from Vietnam and being called ‘boy’. So I questioned myself: “What does a black man have to do before he’s given the respect as a man?” So when I was 18 years old, when I was old enough to fight and die for my country, old enough to drink, old enough to vote, I said I was old enough to be called a man. I self-ordained myself Mr. T so the first word out of everybody’s mouth is “Mr.” That’s a sign of respect that my father didn’t get, that my brother didn’t get, that my mother didn’t get.“

-Mr. T on the subject of his name

#reblogs #mr t #woke #race issues

Starbucks

Cashier girl just asked me if I want 3% milk.

I said “how do you make 3% milk?”

She just shrugged.

I feel like it was one of those “the black raven flies at midnight, but what direction?” kind of RPG puzzles I just failed by not saying some kind of code.

Next time I say “3% milk, gladiator, chameleon, Dionysus, archipelago, epsilon 212-niner” and then wink