I’m planning on starting a No Buy year on October 1 and attempting to document the project here. I must confess right from the start that I anticipate my own failure and feel extreme anxiety and trepidation over the prospect of starting a no buy of any kind, let alone a whole year. I’m also pretty excited at the thought of trying such an ambition. The adrenaline is pumping as I think about, talk about, research and plan the endeavor.
I have found myself in the unfortunate position of having drawn my husband’s attention to my shopping habits. I am making purchases several times a week and buying vast quantities of stuff. I have stock piled back ups to all my skin care, I have more makeup than I can possibly consume in a lifetime, and I have a fabric stash that has the potential to create several closetfuls of clothes. My husband’s scrutiny has forced me to be much more observant of my habits. I have long wanted to declutter and simplify the contents of our homes and lives, and then continue to stuff our house full of things. My loving husband, Rey, has been so astute as to continuous point out this cognitive dissonance. Right now I shop whenever I feel anything. I celebrate with purchases, I buy things to trigger a temporary pleasure in times of stress. It has become my default occupation of my time. Even if I’m not buying, I pretty consistently shopping every day. But that works completely contrary to what my logical brain wants - to prize my space, to clean up fewer messes, to have clear counter tops and a clear mind.
I would like to enjoy the beautiful things I already have and love. I want to enjoy and explore fully the qualities of the beautiful makeup I already own. I want to test all the skincare I’ve purchased and find the alchemical combination of things that will lead to the best results. I really want to use the fabrics I’ve purchased to create clothes that are comfortable and fit well. The time and attention I’m spending acquiring new things has clogged the next step in the process. I’m not ever exploring and cherishing the things I already have it I’m always seeking new things.
The past few years have been very difficult financially for our family. We started in a position of plenty. Two years ago we had no debt and a large safety net. Medical issues and an almost year long unemployment stint for Rey have dramatically changed that reality. We bought a new car to accommodate a third child, spent our emergency fund on the back to back emergency of NICU bills and getting by for months while my husband wasn’t working. Anyway, we are now in a place where we should feel abundance and have plenty and we are living paycheck to paycheck. We have debts. We don’t feel like we have plenty. I never feel satisfaction or security, and I simultaneously can acknowledge that my spending is working contrary to finding security and satisfaction.
I also just like making audacious goals and trying big projects. I’ve recently started watching a YouTuber, Hannah Louise Poston, who is currently on month 9 of a No Buy year. Here’s her channel:
https://www.youtube.com/channel/UCIRfnlVyoIYEGRmH2CVJffw
I find her content super inspiring and interesting and she has been speaking to my soul. Her channel and journey have directly inspired me to do this as well. She has spoken very eloquently on her motivations and her evolving feelings on consumerism, desire, pleasure versus satisfaction. I highly recommend her channel and I am undertaking documenting the project so that I might have a record as useful and interesting as Hannah’s content.
I will not buy any new fabric, makeup, skincare, clothing, accessories, books, digital media or housewares, from October 1, 2018 to October 1, 2019. The exceptions to this rule are ONLY an electric toothbrush and curtain rods. I have been shopping actively for an electric toothbrush as mine broke and I don’t think I will settle on one before the no buy begins, but I don’t want to wait a year to repurchase. Also, we have the curtains sitting waiting at home to be installed and I also don’t want to wait another entire year to have curtains. Otherwise, the only purchases I can make will be to replenish things that have completely run out by category. Meaning, I have to use all the sunscreen in the house before buying new sunscreen, not just my current bottle.
Rey says he wants to do it with me. So, we will purchase food and necessities. We have both determined that clothes for children who have outgrown their clothing counts as a necessity, as do items Rey might require for work. I also have to make purchases for organizations I’m a part of, but those should generally be reimbursed. Since our intention is to limit spending, we will try to be frugal and make these kinds of purchases sparingly and only as necessary.
Safety items are excluded and experiences are excluded, meaning we can buy Disney tickets and renew our zoo membership and pay dance tuition, etc. Birthday gifts for the next two children’s birthdays are already purchased, but Christmas spending is up for discussion and to be discussed at a future time. Gifts in general are not included in the no buy. Generosity and the pleasure of giving to others is definitely not part of the shopping problem, and the kids get invited to parties all the time. But, we won’t be buying gifts for ourselves or each other.
I have my hair professionally colored and I will continue to do so. The challenge of walking into Ulta and not shopping will be considerable, but to be addressed in a future post. I don’t typically indulge in any other professional services, and maybe I’ll change my mind about the hair as the project continues, but as of right now I’m not interested in compromising my appearance in this particular way.
I also have to think further or subscriptions. I have a couple of makeup subscriptions that I won’t be renewing, but they don’t expire until February or March. I might consider giving them away so that I’m not bringing new things into my home, but I’m not sure I know anyone who would be interested at this point. I also might just see if I can cancel the subscriptions altogether and forfeit the money. I kind of think that receiving new things while trying to cure myself of the desire for new things could be a sabotage. Another potential idea is leaving the boxes unopened until after the end of the no buy. Further contemplation on this to follow.
Finally, a note on minimalism and decluttering.
Over the course of the no buy year I DO hope to declutter, but the no buy is not directly related to the decluttering process. Rey and I both agree to assess our possessions and try to pair them down to the things that are essential, necessary and pleasurable. We have recently gone through the closets and decluttered a large amount of clothing, we want to go through the bookshelves and clear out what we aren’t going to read or reread, sort through the kitchen wares, etc. I am a bit intimidated by the idea that we could declutter something and then discover we have needed it and then not be able to replace it during the year. I know this fear is unfounded and irrational, but part of my addiction to acquiring things and hoarding, but I have it nevertheless.
The minimalism aspects of this project are secondary to the idea of finding a way out of the cycle of pushing for that pleasure, and instead finding my way to satisfaction and a feeling of abundance. The money savings is also a secondary, but important facet of the project. So far, all the blogs I’ve seen regarding no buys focus on minimalism and financial responsibility. While those may be Rey’s primary motivations in supporting me, I’m much more interested in my emotional landscape and how to negotiate my desire.
