I love the headcanon that Stan is touch-starved so I wrote a little drabble about it (I dont remember who came up with it) if u know who pls tag them/send this to them!)
Not noticeably, but he was indeed trembling a bit.
It’s been years since someone last touched him in a loving way, and he was beginning to forget what a loving human touch felt like.
Until he met Jimmy Bending.
The way he hugged him one day made Stan’s heart flutter. Ever since then, Stan’s developed a huge crush on Jimmy. Luckily for him, Jimmy felt the same, and now they were dating. However, although they would often flirt with each other, the couple has never done anything physical yet. They never held hands or cuddled or even kissed. And now that Stan remembered what touch felt like, he began to miss it desperately once again.
But he was afraid to touch Jimmy.
With Jimmy’s dark past of abuse and prostitution, Stan was afraid one touch would overwhelm him, and Stan didn’t want to make someone he loved uncomfortable for his own needs.
So he didn’t say anything when he got into Jimmy’s car to deliver water.
He didn’t say anything when Jimmy rested his hand on the console, just mere inches away from Stan’s arm.
As Jimmy went on about how great his new job at the Winery is, Stan stared longingly at Jimmy’s hand.
With a trembling hand, Stan placed it on the console, Jimmy’s hand now barely centimeters away.
Stan slowly starting inching his hand towards Jimmy’s. Almost… Right when their hands were about to brush, Jimmy lifted his hand to place it back on the steering wheel.
Jimmy briefly glanced over at Stan, noticing his wild expression. He looked as if someone slapped him. Jimmy abruptly stopped talking about his job.
Stan finally broke out of his trance and nodded.
“Y-Yeah, I’m alright. I-I think that’s the c-customer up there!” He exclaimed, purposefully changing the subject. Jimmy quickly stopped the car and got out.
“I’ll take care of this one.” With that, Jimmy shut the door and walked around to open the trunk. Stan watched him longingly the whole time. From when he got the water out of the trunk, to when he was giving the man his supply of water, to when he got back in the car and started driving again.
By now Stan was playing with his fingers and his shaking was more prominent.
He resorted to clasping his hands together, scratching at them every once in a while out of nervousness.
He was just so afraid to touch Jimmy, he felt the need to restrain himself from doing so.
By now Jimmy began noticing his boyfriend’s anxious behavior.
“Stan are you okay?” He asked once again, concern lacing his voice. Stan jumped and attempted to regain his relaxed posture. “Y-Yeah, o-of course. I’m f-fine. Don’t wor-rry Friendly J.”
Jimmy frowned, but kept driving. “The next’s order’s from Paleto,” He said quietly. Stan nodded.
He only got worse throughout the drive.
His shaking intensified, he scratched at his hands more, and whenever Jimmy tried to talk to him, he would flinch and barely manage to stutter out a response.
By about the halfway point to meet their next customer, Jimmy had enough and pulled into the burger shop parking lot. He turned the car off and turned to Stan, his expression stern yet worried.
“Okay, what’s the matter?”
Stan flinched and avoided Jimmy’s gaze.
“W-What do you mean, Friendly J? I’m f-fine!
“Cut the bullshit. You’ve been shaking throughout the whole ride, you’re sweating, you jump every time I talk to you, and you keep scratching at your hands. Did something happen? Talk to me, Stan!”
Stan scratched the back of his neck. Desperate to not drag Jimmy into his problems, he quickly responded, “I-I haven’t had water since yesterday! Y-Yeah, that’s it! I-I’ll just g-get some from the back!” With that, he swiftly pushed the door open and made his way to the back of the car, not stopping when he reached the trunk.
He stopped when he heard Jimmy open his door and sternly call out his name.
Stan sighed and turned around as Jimmy approached him.
“Stan just tell me what’s wrong! I just wanna help!”
Stan felt tears well up in his eyes.
“N-No! I-I don’t want you getting involved. I-I don’t wanna d-drag you down too!”
“Stan don’t worry about me right now. Just tell me what’s wrong with you, please!”
Stan couldn’t take it anymore.
With that, he let the tears fall, along with his knees.
“M-My ex-wife, Denise, w-would never let me touch her, s-so over time, I learned to get used to it. B-But then I met you, a-and when you hugged me, it just made me r-remember how good it felt! B-But w-with your prostitution job, I-I’ve been too afraid to touch you- I mean, y-you get touched on a d-daily basis! I don’t wanna m-make you uncomfortable or s-scare you just f-for my own needs! W-What if I t-touch you the wrong way a-and you l-leave me?” Stan almost whispered that last part.
Jimmy just stared at him, his heart breaking. He slowly approached Stan and knelt down, slipping a finger under his chin so he would look up at him.
“Stan, while what you said about my prostitution job and how I react to touch may be true, that only applies to clients and random strangers. With you Stan, it’s okay. I know you would never hurt me and I know you have good intentions. I guess I’m just still getting used to the whole touch thing, which is why I haven’t touched you since we hugged. So I guess in a way, heh, this is my fault.” Jimmy’s voice broke at that last part.
“N-No no, Jimmy, it’s not your fault, it’s Denise’s. If y-you’re not ready to be touched by someone else, that’s perfectly fine w-with me. I-I was just overreacting, I shouldn’t have-”
Stan was cut off by Jimmy wrapping his arms around him, pulling him into a loving, yet back-breaking embrace. Stan’s eyes widened, and all he could do was sit there in shock. Jimmy rubbed his back. “It’s okay Sunflower. You can hug me back.”
The tears that finally slowed started streaming down Stan’s face once again as Stan hugged back, burying his face in Jimmy’s neck as he sobbed silently.
“Shh, it’s okay. I got you.”
Even after Stan’s sobs finally subsided, the pair continued to cling to each other as if the other would disappear into thin air. Eventually they pulled back, Jimmy helping Stan to his feet. Stan giggled lightly as Jimmy wiped his tears with the pads of his thumbs. “Thanks.”
Instead, he grabbed Stan’s face, pulling him forward, and kissed him.
Stan stood there in shock before returning the kiss, grabbing Jimmy’s jacket and pulling him closer. They didn’t care who saw. They didn’t care that they were standing in the middle of a parking lot. All they cared about was each other. They finally pulled away, gasping for breath.
Jimmy then grabbed Stan’s hands and peppered soft kisses all over the freshly raw skin, making Stan blush. When he finished his hands, he planted a kiss on Stan’s cheek before pressing their foreheads together.
“I love you Sunflower. Don’t ever forget that.”
“I love you too, Friendly J.”
2087
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