Beau's Diary

I talk about stuff || He/Him || 21 || art account is beauberry05

[froggyfanboy]

Entry 7

CW: talk of suicidal ideation and self harm

I don't remember the first time that I consciously thought "I want to die"

my mom says that she noticed me start to pull away in middle school and for a while i went with that but after thinking about it i think it was before then. i started self harming in middle school and the first time i told someone about it (albeit over the internet to another mentally ill child) was also in middle school but a feeling that big doesn't happen overnight. i feel like a lot of the abuse i endured as a child is a big reason for it and that was happening years before.

i lived with the feeling for so long that it became background noise that slowly got louder and louder until it was so loud that i had to do something about it.

i don't think that feeling ever really went away. i don't even know how i'd feel if it did. but i do know that i want to live a lot more than i used to.

[vunderjoy]

they are frequent costars in their respective acts, know this

[do-you-have-a-flag]

how fucked up do you think it was for stratt and carl and the staff to watch grace flee and get tackled and drugged while basically dressed like a fisherman teddy bear in a cheerful yellow raincoat

[do-you-have-a-flag]

(tags via @cosmichorrorbarbie)

[sisaloofafump]

Tfw your distrusting touch averse batfriend trusts you enough for casual touch on a random monday

[ciricearts]

older jason!! :9 (knightfight design ofc) (twt prompt)

[stonerparty]

[dawn4ngel]

[bbcwhereareyou]

[punchholesinthesky]

[pietriarchy]

[asexualgeorgecostanza-deactivat]

[joey-wheeler-official]

[piss-bong]

[canopycapers-deactivated2022111]

[schmendrick-lamar-deactivated20]

[journeymanfool]

[dowereallyneedthis]

[favoritefightingfrenchgoth]

[disorderfaking-deactivated20200]

[goofballproximitysurveyor-deact]

[wilburian-deactivated20221116]

great job everyone lets hit the showers

[testosteronetwink]

[pinkthinkspalistineshouldbefree]

Not again

[worldheritagepostorganization]

World Heritage Post

[froggyfanboy]

every time i see a post where the poster says "my girlfriend" i assume it's lesbians. i am often wrong

[froggyfanboy]

theres this one ad with this random guy that just says a bunch of words and then "join me on the purple chair 🥰" and then i skip it every time cause i don't want to join him

[matchamilk030]

breaking out of my hiatus just to redraw that fuckass expression they did in the new chapter

might redraw the other glorious expressions they did aswell

[froggyfanboy]

does anyone remember that one artist on tiktok who got really mad that people were calling their sona oversexualized because it was "just anatomy" but they gave their sona a camel toe and you could see their nipples through their shirt? i wonder what happened to them

[luchigeon]

expectations

[mo0nrune]

shrimp

[blorp-o]

[froggyfanboy]

once i saw an asmr video called "curing your adhd" and that already made me upset but i clicked on the video because it was made by a creator i like. and then. there was a fucking disclaimer saying "adhd is a real disorder and this wont actually cure it blah blah" then why??? title the video that??? like i could let it slide if she was genuinely ignorant but she basically admitted that she could've easily titled the video "curing your low attention span" and made the exact same video.

"in the asmr world, adhd is a good buzzword" so is low attention span. and even then thats not a good argument, person i made up, because the only way to stop it from being a good buzzword is if creators stop using it.

[froggyfanboy]

Entey 6

my little sister (3) told me that her favorite color is orange and i genuinely haven't seen the color the same since. i don't see it super often but every time i do, i think of her and smile. it made me realize that i actually don't use the color in my art very much and i feel a strong desire to change that.

i doubt this will be her favorite forever, she's 3, but at least for now it makes me smile