I revisited my logs on here. I feel as though I am in such a different place than I was a year ago.
In srq I am settled in a house that I am considering to make a more than temporary home. I have attachments to this place that are borne out of more than poor circumstance. I cook food unique to my culture, clean, and have roommates. When my room is a mess, I care--but not as much as before. I feel like before my living situation was more of a performance than actual living.
All previous posts are from trips to either Jamaica or Atlanta. I was so giddy then. Now I am hesitant to welcome optimism on my travels. Now I know what to expect (to the extent a mere mortal can truly predict anything). The logistics are dizzying right now. So far, these feelings aren’t reflected anywhere on my blog. Until now.
I am going to try to write more honestly. While I have enjoyed my travels thus far (and the ones I have blogged about are not the full extent of where I have been or hope to be), I have pandered to an audience. It’s obvious.Â
I am launching this process by allowing myself to feel more fully. It’s a habit of mine to feel as though I must always be grateful for the opportunities that present themselves my way. That’s an unrealistic ideal because no one is always one way. We feel a range of emotions, and right now I am feeling critical of myself and stressed regarding my thesis work in JA.Â












