Otherkin vs Gender Identity
I know that it’s probably been said a thousand times before, but the new plant/animal/object pronouns are very problematic and hurtful to the trans community.
Before I begin, I’d like to state that even though I greatly dislike the new pronoun system, if a person told me that they wanted to be called by a certain pronoun, I’d call them by it. I don’t want people to feel bad about their pronoun choices, but at the same time I hope you realize the damage that is being done. Additionally, I believe that being otherkin is valid, however it has NOTHING TO DO WITH GENDER.*****
Life is hard enough as-is for non-binary people. People STILL don’t consider nb to be a valid identity. How does this affect me? My boyfriend (he prefers I call him my boyfriend) is genderfluid, and every time I explain that to someone they bitch and whine about it, while at the same time I can tell the same person I’m a transman and they’re 100% okay with it because they see it as valid.
The problem with the new pronouns is based off expectations. When I say I’m male, people expect I have a certain anatomical makeup. Because I don’t yet, I have been verbally abused, discriminated against, and generally harassed. Trans women have the same exact problems, and sometimes it’s even worse because of transmisogany and sexism.
When you use plants, animals, or objects for your pronouns, nobody is going to give you a hard time for looking a certain way. Nobody is going to tell you that you can’t use a certain bathroom. Nobody is going to beat you up.
And before you say I’m an idiot because saying that the new pronoun system is nb erasure, let me explain a thing about being non-binary. As ironic as it seems, in order for nb to exist, there must first be a binary to base it off of. Those binaries are male and female. When a person says that they identify as agender, that means they don’t identify as male or female. When a person says that they identify as genderfluid, that means that they identify as male sometimes, and female sometimes. See the pattern? Saying you identify as a plant/animal/object has nothing to do with gender at all. If people identified as animals, then there wouldn’t even be an issue. But saying that identity is the same as a gender identity is wrong, because gender is a social construct based on sexual attributes, and your actual being is different then your gender.
Alternately, animals are gendered too.
And before I get some sort of message saying “you hate furries!” or “you just don’t understand”! Let me explain a few things.
One: I don’t hate furries. I occasionally draw furry porn on e621. I started there because it seemed like a safe outlet where I could express my sexuality and physical appearance safely and comfortably. I also know that not everyone who identifies as a furry draws nsfw things, and that not everyone who draws anthro art is a furry.
Two: I understand that some of this has NOTHING to do with furries, however it appears that the person who started this is a furry.
Three: I completely understand not wanting to be human. I get that. When I was little, I used to wish I wasn’t ALL the time. I understand someone saying “but on the inside I’m a wolf”. Okay. That’s fine. Just don’t make it about gender. Because saying you wish you were an animal has nothing to do with gender. At all.
The new pronouns would be less of a big deal if it wasn’t for cis people. I literally wouldn’t give a crap at all if you wanted to be called an animal/plant/object as your pronoun, but because it’s hard enough to be taken seriously when I say something as simple as “I identify as male”, there’s no way in HELL cis people are gonna take the new system seriously. Hell, they can’t even wrap their minds around BINARY trans people! They often don’t even think being non-binary is valid. There are TRANS people who don’t think being non-binary is valid! Trying to make new pronouns that actually have NOTHING to do with gender at all makes it even EASIER for cis people to say shit like “You don’t identify as male or female? What’s next, you’re gonna tell me you’re a plant or something like those other freaks?” and treat us like shit because they have more leverage now.
Then people started using the new pronouns because they though they were “cute”
A pronoun is not an accessory. It’s not a fashion statement. It is something I have fought for, and something I could easily be killed for. Nobody is gonna kill you because you think you’re a rabbit. Who cares? It’s not like that affects what bathroom or changing room you use, or how people are gonna treat you when you enter it. It changes nothing and makes the rest of us seem like idiots for trying so hard. Gender is NOT something that’s taken lightly in our society, unfortunately.
****In writing this, my goal was NOT to say something like “everyone who uses the new pronouns are scum” or “I want then to die” because that is so far from my goal I could ship it a package and it wouldn’t arrive until a year later. What I wanted to outline is WHY these new pronouns are problematic and how they cause issues that could easily be avoided if they didn’t exist. I wanted to do it in a way that is (hopefully) readable and not aimed at telling people they’re wrong. I just want to educated people about why trans people feel the way they do about all this, and why it’s damaging. Please, at least consider what you’re doing when you start using these.