Fuck Yeah, Queer Intern Adventures!

The adventures of two queer grad students at their super queer summer internship!

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New Names

Roomie and I have new names:

C& (pronounced campersand)

AND

K* (pronounced kasterick)

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I'm afraid of drag queens.

Our supervisor. Love it.

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New Vocabulary

Non-refundable bus ticket

The sexual act of someone putting your toes (generally dirty) in their mouth

Chicken Fried Rice

When someone goes down on you and fingers you at the same time

Duck Fucking

A more useful term for fisting, actually describing the motion (rather than the cunt punch that is imagined with the term fisting)

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Chicken Fried Rice? I didn’t know there was a name for that. Who knew!

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That's because Kayla and her friends made the name up for it when she was in high school. Because high schoolers can't actually talk about sex using sex words, they need to create food-based euphemisms for sex acts. Chicken = chicken fingers = fingering. Fried Rice = Chinese Take Out = Eating out.

[fuckyeahqueerinternadventur-blog]

New Vocabulary

Non-refundable bus ticket

The sexual act of someone putting your toes (generally dirty) in their mouth

Chicken Fried Rice

When someone goes down on you and fingers you at the same time

Duck Fucking

A more useful term for fisting, actually describing the motion (rather than the cunt punch that is imagined with the term fisting)

[fuckyeahqueerinternadventur-blog]

Cam: You're just not feminine enough to be a lipstick lesbian. You're somewhere in between that and a chapstick lesbian.

Kayla: But I don't want to be a chapstick lesbian! I want to be a lipstick lesbian.

Cam: But you're not.

Kayla: Well, can I be a lip gloss lesbian?

YES!

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Oh, the conversations inspired by the queer interns at work

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Definitely how the roomie and I plan to celebrate the 4th tomorrow - matching tattoo time! 

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Queer Intern Jokes

Kayla: It says "Hermaphrodite - the correct term for intersex people"

Cam: How old is this?? Wow, that's ballsy.

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Today's overheard intern remarks in the car have been censored. Make good decisions, y'all, and happy Friday.

Supervisor's Facebook status after our car trip to UC Irvine

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Yeah, decided not to do the colon hydrotherapy groupon. As much as I love a good herb enema...

Really, Groupon?

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Why do we call a man who we consider weak or a wimp to be a pussy, yet if a woman does something courageous or masculine, we say she has balls? Don't people realize that the pussy is the most resilient part of a woman?? It bleeds for a week every month and doesn't die, and it does the whole baby thing....And balls? Balls are definitely a man's weakest point. You kick a guy in the balls and he's down.

This seems backwards.

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This is why I can't have nice things. I have bitch pop and hamsters.

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Cam: Yeah, you know, a male lesbian. A man who is primarily attracted to queer women.

Kayla: Well, what if I'm a straight girl primarily attracted to queer men. What's my label?

Cam: I don't know...a female gay man?

Kayla: I can't be a gay woman. That doesn't work at all...

Cam: You have a vagina, you don't get an identity. Duh.

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I'm sorry, potato queen? What?

"Why are we teaching straight people racist queer terminology? This makes me kind of uncomfortable." - Cam and his glossary

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All I can really say about her is....she was kind of a...wait...what word can I use....? [checks UC Davis "Words That Hurt And Why" List]....Cunt. She was a cunt.

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iPhones take us to the most legit places for Cam's booze.

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Na, na, na, na, na, na, na, na, Gendered Bathrooms! Na, na, na, na, na, na, na, na, Gendered Bathrooms! Gendered bathrooms, gendered bathrooms, gendered bathrooms!