What Men Want
YK:
we sell a
Vibratory Accurate and Comfortable Controller for Xbox 360(White)
sounds like the perfect vibrator
vibratory accurate and comfortable
JO:
I like my vibrators to have a bit of hair on them
so for me that's not perfect

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Janaina Medeiros
we're not kids anymore.
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art blog(derogatory)
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@fuckyeahworkquotes
What Men Want
YK:
we sell a
Vibratory Accurate and Comfortable Controller for Xbox 360(White)
sounds like the perfect vibrator
vibratory accurate and comfortable
JO:
I like my vibrators to have a bit of hair on them
so for me that's not perfect
If It Only Would Be That Easy
JO:
oh no kanye west is talking
*deletes ears*
E.T.
LC: luvvvvvvvvvvvv the new Katy Perry song
i would so sign this song if I ever encounter a hawt alien
Mouth Fart
JO: mouth fart, worst kind
my taxi driver mouth farted the other day I almost puked on him
it's not a burp when your breath smells like shit
that's a mouth fart
Moobs
JO:
a lot of moobs in this office
GL:
whats a moob
JO:
man boob
He's The Smart One In Our Team
YK:
/inserts
The Procrastination Flowchart
JO:
meh
I'll read that later
^HAHAH SEE WHAT I DID THERE!?!?!?
I measure my penis starting from my asshole to the tip. So my penis is 15 inches.
JO
hehe
GL: hehe
SL: where did you learn the stupid "hehe"?
SL: "hehe" sounds special. the "special olympic" kind of special.
GL: HEY!
One Thing Trains & Peeing Have In Common
LC: hey guys quick question .... what sound does a train make? honestly...
JO: choo choo chaboogey woo woo
GW: chug a chug a chug a chug a CHOO CHOO
LC: i thought it was shu shuuuuuuuu
but i guess that's the spanish way
and it makes Y. wanna go peeeee
soo .... i'll go with Choo choo then
How To Spot Gay People
JO: here's the rule for straight men and their thoughts on gays
typical
if you're actually straight you have no opinion
gays exist outside your daily thoughts which include hating your job being hungry and wanting sex
if however you think you might be gay yourself
but are not comfortable with the idea
the gayness CONSUMES your daily thought process to the point of serious anger
you can no longer focus on hating your job being hungry and wanting sex
instead you burn for the penis
this penis craving goes against your strictly christian upbringing
so you have to FIGHT IT
you insult the gays and go to anti gay rallies
you tell everyone who will listen how much you hate gays
you have a lot of energy and time for gay hate
meanwhile straight men don't even think about them
oh it's a gay guy, that's nice
I hate my job I'm hungry and I want sex
in conclusion
how to spot a secret gay? it's no secret at all
he's the guy who HATES gays
and
(here's the catch)
thusly hates himself
The End.
by the way
I HATE gay people SO MUCH OH MY GOD
I just want to OOOOH ID ONT KNOW
SO ANGRY
chinglish likes it from the front but NEEDS it from the rear
JO
for the ones who weren't in the meeting yesterday we managed to write penis on the board
CV
On Mushroom-Pumpkins
JO: I think Snooki is a genius
you're born a mushroom-pumpkin with long hair
you have pretty much no shot in this world at anything
then you start drinking
wake up 20 years later and you're on TV
rich, famous
paid to show up at parties
it's the real american dream
YK: you're born a mushroom-pumpkin with long hair
XD
JO:
as a child she was nearly mistaken for food, but the hair saved her life
Gene Simmons Is More Evil Than Hitler. Fact.
CR: I fucking hate Kiss. Dreadful.
VA: They're awesome. They must be doing something right, cause they have millions of fans.
CR: Millions of people voted for the Nazis - doesn't make it right...
VA: Strange comparison.
CR: Well, I'd rather vote for the Nazi's than listen to Kiss.
are you saying my feet are fat?
JO
The Emote Saga
YK: why don't you use emotes?
JR: good question
do you want the long version or the short
YK: long please
JR: ok
well it all started back in 1993
i was a young boy earning a farthing reading knees in the rough streets of Newcastle under lyme
(a small market town in staffordshire)
i would work everyday before and after school as well as at the weekends
the older boys would pick on me and chase me with their BMX bikes, but i didn't let that stop me from earing some cash
eventually i managed to save up enough farthings to buy my first computer, from a man named smelly frank (who's life came to an end following an unfortunate incedent with a knife, a prostitute and a crisp box)
but that's a whole other story
YK: HAHA
you're insane
i like the story
JR: so i made the trip down to smelly franks store where he sold me my first apple computer that he had acquired from a nazi war criminal in 1985
the computer cost me 127 farthings which was the equivilant to 6523 knee readings
i will always remember that day and the wise words smelly frank gave me as i walked out of his stinky shop with my Apple computer and a bottle of Bishops Finger ale, that I had swiped and hidden in my jacket as a present for my grandfather
he told me that one day they would develop emotions for use with something he called "the Messenger" an idea he developed as a young man with his cousin called Bill
he said that these emotions will seem harmless enough at first but as with everything in this world they people will use and abuse them and before you know it you will have cartoon genitalia flashing on your screen whilst at work
he told me that day to be careful with my newly acquired computer and that i should avoid emotions at all costs
sadly for smelly frank he didn't listen to his own sage advice
and after forming an online relationship with a woman called gertrude
he decided to arrange a meeting, mainly because of the sexy emotions she would send him
smelly fank was completly besotted by gertrude and after sharing his most inner secrets with her, he felt that he could trust her enough to meet
unfortunately for smelly frank he told her that he had $50,000 stored in a box of crisps in the back of his shop
from that day forth i swore that i would never use an emote
the end
YK: hahahahaha
APPLAUSE
/bows