keep breathing @funkvolume - Tumblr Blog

elfel-deactivated20141214

i was walking through walmart and my mum pointed to this and went “hey it looks just like you”

discreet45

bloodmancerr-deactivated

i never want context

curlicuecal

Oh my god, they sprang this on us in our old church years ago, and my family has never let this joke die.

Okay, here’s the stupid gender essentialist metaphor:

Women are like spaghetti because their thoughts noodle all over the place. Men are like waffles because there thoughts are in boxes. Men aren’t bad listeners, they just can’t keep up with a conversation when women are noodling topics so fast and they have to keep switching boxes. Also, when a woman asks a man what he’s thinking and he says “nothing” women just don’t understand that some of a man’s boxes literally have nothing in them, haha!

….. :|

Anyway, if you think me and my brothers and my mom don’t constantly give each other sad, tragic faces and say “I’m sorry, my waffle box is empty today” and “noodle faster!” and “you are failing at being a waffle” and “I can’t be clearer, I am a plate of spaghetti” pretty much indiscriminately in all directions all the time…. you would be wrong.

kyraneko

Occasionally the context of a Dadaist post makes it even better.

anxious-but-whatever-deactivate

Whatthehickityheck

truntechgodhead

not every autistic person can infodump or give you every piece of trivia about their special interest(s) at the drop of a hat. both memory recall and communication issues are common symptoms of autism, making it hard to remember and relay information about things even if we care about them very deeply. not every autistic person even WANTS to be able to do that. sometimes a special interest is just something that makes you really happy. you dont need to know everything about it for it to be a "real" special interest

allistics do not clown on this post

tesco-offickle

This post also applies to adhd! Don’t stress us out about hyperfixations! Please!

veryfunnymemes

mjalti

look if you decide to have a problem after midnight, that’s between you & God tbh

harvestspriteirl

Y’all highkey silence your phone forever. Make everyone wait on you. Remind them you are your own person on your own time.

My phone is never on ring. You’ll be lucky if my bitch ass feels generous enough to put it on vibrate. The shit is in my hand at least 5 hours a day, if I don’t notice the notification or I’m busy then I wouldn’t have responded anyways, I would have just been irked that it went off at all.

My contacts are at my mercy. They claw at my pants’ legs and beg for my attention. I feel nothing for my notifications except pure contempt and disgust when I can be assed to feel anything for them.

professional-moron

I can’t stop laugh at these tags

oxfrnk

don’t!!! fake!!!! your!!!! interests!!!! to!!!! make!!!! someone!!!! like!!!!! you!!!!

the-last-d-boy

don’t!!! bury!!!! your!!!! interests!!! to!!!!! make!!!! someone!!!! like!!!!! you!!!!

hxasinthus

being naked is not sexy. wearing a white 18th century shirt with poofy sleeves tucked into a pair of black high waisted trousers is sexy. there are no exceptions

locallovewitch-deactivated20201

hey so uhhh here’s an important update on what’s apparently happening at the border, especially with the use of the old japanese internment camps

all i can say is i’m sickened by this mess, by the atrocities committed against innocent people. and now there will be no surveillance. no one will be able to see what happens to these people. the UN, the media, and any other human rights organizations cannot get into these facilities, either, in order to stop what’s happening. by the way, coast guard members were apparently aiding in this process as well. so now it’s only a matter of time before it becomes a military movement.

no one gets in. no one gets out.

so when are we going to call this what it is? it’s fascism. it’s genocide. and if we don’t stop it now, it’s going to be disastrous.

contact your senators, your representatives, anyone that’s in office that can get off their lazy ass and do something.

locallovewitch-deactivated20201

can y’all please reblog this i’m begging

closet-keys

[image description: series of tweets by @ECMcLaughlin reading:

CBP then transfers these human beings to a facility called “the Dog Pound.” (Here, my friend started crying.) The “Dog Pound” is comprised of cages, outside and on dirt, with no protection from the elements. Don’t look away.

There are dozens of teen moms there. There is no baby food. While there, my friend saw a CBP agent take a baby from her teenage mother, strip the baby of its clothes, hand the baby back to the mother, and send them outside to the “Dog Pound” to sleep in the dirt.

The “Dog Pound” has no running water, no covers, no tarp, no care, no safety from the elements. It is freezing at night, and deathly hot during the day. Everyone is sick. My friend said she saw a baby on this trip that was so sick “I thought it would be dead by morning.”

Toddlers in the “Dog Pound” who had been eating solid food are given only infant formula. Moms are trying to start breast feeding again so their children don’t starve. These moms are dehydrated, sick, & have walked miles through desert with no water. CBP gives them nothing.

It gets worse. Don’t look away. From the “Dog Pound,” these human beings are moved to an area called “The Freezer.“ The Freezer is kept at 55 degrees. Some of the refugees who are moved there are still wet from their journey, and are put in The Freezer wet.

CBP is keeping human beings in “The Freezer” for weeks at a time. WEEKS. Including critically ill people, disabled people, sick children, teenage mothers with babies. The floor of The Freezer is made of dirt or very rough concrete. There are no beds. Keep reading.

From “The Freezer,” refugees are supposed to be moved to ICE facilities that are designed for residential care. They have beds, food, bathrooms. However, (keep reading) THOSE FACILITIES ARE EMPTY. ICE IS SHUTTING THEM DOWN. Don’t look away.

What our government is doing instead is moving refugees to MILITARY INSTALLATIONS. The announcement about Fort Sill, which was used as a Japanese internment camp, is only the start.So why would our government be doing this?

Here’s why: These concentration camps (let’s call them what they are) will be under the control of the Department of Homeland Security, but within the Department of Defense.

Unlike ICE facilities, which allow site inspectors inside, there will be no inspection of military-run camps. The military will be able to deny access to anyone it chooses. No media. No oversight.

Lawyers will not be allowed in. Human rights monitors will not be allowed in. The camps will also be protected airspace, meaning that no drones can fly over them to take pictures of what’s going on inside.

/End image description]

timetoexplorethis

During their detention last month in a U.S. Customs and Border Protection facili...

The Trump administration is facing growing complaints from migrants about severe overcrowding, meager food and other hardships at border hol

toshio

me @ any and every cat in existence:

andrewbelami

neonprotagonist

modern deadly sins

finding an internet personality attractive

booting up sims just to play god and torture your sims

vagueing about someone, blocking them when they confront you, and adding them to your dni

rewatching the same thing on netflix over and over again instead of doing something else

lo fi youtube livestreams

claiming that your music taste is super unusual but its like, hozier and gorillaz

ruining a dnd session by attempting to fuck/kill/steal from anything that moves cause u thought itd be funny

paradiselive56

meatprincess

does anyone know if this is fake or not?? is she okay??

dontwannasaygoodbye

If you ever feel fat just remember it’s because your body needs to expand to contain all of its cuteness

tanoraqui

y’all talk a big game about loving the Found Family trope, but have you ever personally burst into tears while watching 2000 Disney classic The Tigger Movie, in which Tigger realizes the existential horror and bone-aching loneliness of being “the only one” and starts desperately trying to contact other tiggers, building up his hopes only to have them crumble like like cheap honeycomb, but then he realizes that he already HAS a family right here with his friends in Hundred Acre Woods? huh? get on my level.

parks-and-recreation-department

10knotes

Beautiful

maculategiraffe

me, reaching into my dresser drawer for black pants: I hope this isn’t the pair with big holes worn in the inner thighs

Marie Kondo, gently over my shoulder: why is a pair of pants you find unwearable still in your dresser drawer

me: oh shit that’s right!! The dresser is for clothes that under some circumstance I might conceivably wear!!

Marie Kondo, beaming proudly: Yes, that’s correct!! These pants must have been your favorites. How wonderful that they were so comfortable and practical that you wore them out. But now since they no longer function as pants, you should move them from the drawer where you keep your functioning pants!

me: Yes thanks I got it they’re in the fabric basket now

Marie Kondo, fading back into the darkness: I love what you’ve done with the kitchen!!

cwicseolfor

The notion of KonMari as some creepy semi-embodied but entirely benevolent spirit, like a well-intentioned Bloody Mary, is so perfect and wonderful.

essoreese

Marie Kondo has the same powers but the exact opposite energy of the Duolingo Owl.

strangelyregular

YES.

Marie Kondo: Your room isn’t very clean, but that’s okay, I love mess! Does this spark joy?

Duolingo Owl: I wrote the ransom note in Spanish, and if you have to use Google Translate to read it, your kid gets it. You broke your streak. I’ll break your neck.