death of a bachelor

Max Thomas - 22 - da fuq?

[fvckmax-thomas-blog]

iwonaivanov:

“Oh my God,” Iwona exclaimed, emerging from the bathroom stall of the James Lee house just moments after a jock had burst out and left the restroom. She could hear the distant sound of the DJ in the quad, attempting to hype a tired crowd up. “I embarrassed myself so bad. God. I don’t even know his name. I accidentally bit his nipple so hard it bled and he looked so red in the face, I swear to God he looked like he was about to combust.”

His clouded mind couldn’t imagine this was actually what he was hearing. Max looked over at the girl, his hair and clothes disheveled by the parties events. “How do you accidentally bite down that hard?” the boy asked, his voice slurred by the copious amounts of alcohol he had downed over the night. “Do you have a jaw problem or....?”

[fvckmax-thomas-blog]

Parties usually meant early drinking for Max. He wasn’t the most ‘party’-centric person in his sober light, but as soon as the alcohol hit him, he couldn’t help but become the life of the party. His tall frame was draped in his usual leather jacket with his dark eyes hidden by even darker shades. Max had remember his brothers saying something along the lines of ‘you dress like a theatre kid.’ and he never knew what that meant, but his outfit tonight opened his eyes to the comment. 

The boy stayed to himself for the first few moments of the party. His hand grasped a brown bottle, taking sips from it periodically. Suddenly, he felt someone bump into the back of him, sending beer down his shirt. “Nice going, Ace.” Max said to whoever had made that move. “First day with the new legs?”

[fvckmax-thomas-blog]

📱 😬

lana: UM ok well i kind of need a ride

lana: i had one bt he made me get out in a random neighbourhood rip

max: .....

max: i'll come get you

max: give me a moment

[fvckmax-thomas-blog]

📱 😬

lana: oh.......hi

lana: i'm sry i didn't mean to text you

lana: i'll ask someone else if u want

max: it's fine

max: promise

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📱 open

lana: 😞😞😞 sighs

lana: SIGHS LOUDER IN CASE U DIDN'T HEAR ME!!!

lana: i need assistance

max: does this task require movement?

max: cause that's the big deciding factor

[fvckmax-thomas-blog]

teddylawrvnce:

“To be fair, I’d rather go through Chinese water torture than study, but you’re also far better than torture so I’ll take it.” He said with a hum, a grin spreading across his face. “I dunno man, I don’t think she’s felt any positive emotions since the 40′s. Maybe you can make her heart grow three sizes, like the Grinch. That’d be impressive.”

“I should hope I’m better than torture. I like to think I’m a pretty damn good musician.” he replied with a fake offended gasp. “You really think she’s that old?” Max asked as he leaned his head over to see her better. “I can try? But wouldn’t that actually kill her? Or was that you overall plan?”

[fvckmax-thomas-blog]

📲 open

brennan: get one of those old style microphones on your neck

max: DUDE. fuck me up.

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lilahkcnnedy:

“Yeah. I’ve never dropped my panties for someone that doesn’t look like a string bean,” Lilah commented nonchalantly, breeze riling the pale waves around her cheeks as she looked at him. “Slenderman doesn’t have eight arms, what the fuck? Slacking on your knowledge. That’s kind of disgraceful, in all honesty.”

“Dammit.” the words punctuated by the smoke escaping from his mouth. “Guess I’m too bulky for you liking then, eh?” Max threw his cigarette butt onto the grass, putting it out with the bottom of his shoe. “Well, he has a bunch of tentacle things right? Or did I make that up?”

[fvckmax-thomas-blog]

lilahkcnnedy:

Wandering out onto the porch as the party inside thrummed as persistently as the beat of a Jumanji board game, Lilah wedged a menthol cigarette between her lips and lit up. “I think I saw Slenderman in the bushes over there,” she commented crisply, words chased out in a breath of smoke as she limply gestured into the distance. “Think I should call him over so I can get his number?”

Max had ducked out of the party to grab a smoke, his body leaned up against the house. Smoke trailed from the boys mouth as he took a puff. “You into those tall, skinny guys, eh?” he asked with a chuckle, his cigarette clamped in his teeth. “Or is it the eight arms that get you?”

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nolennon:

‘-Hey, cover bands have made it pretty big,” she told him, raising a brow. “Who’d you take it from?”

“Lawrence O’Keefe.” Max stated with a small smile, continuing to drum on his notebooks. “A true genius.”

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luciwolfe:

Sighing heavily, she momentarily felt bad for scolding the other, but quickly brushed it off. “It’s fine,” she said, shrugging a shoulder. “Just got a bit of a fright, I guess. Can’t deal with people in their cars. It’s like they thing they’re immune to the real world because they’re in air conditioned boxes.”

“We should petition to get rid of those big metal death machines, amish one.” Max teased the girl, handing her her stuff back.

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@luciwolfe: CATCH @maxmakesmusic 's CHLAMYDIA TODAY!!!

@maxmakesmusic: @luciwolfe is the worst ever. max is the best. pass it on.

[fvckmax-thomas-blog]

@luciwolfe: @maxmakesmusic I'm a real RIOT! ( BUY PARAMORE'S MOST ACCLAIMED ALBUM ON ITUNES TODAY!!! )

@maxmakesmusic: @luciwolfe fuk you, promote me instead of paramore

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@luciwolfe: @maxmakesmusic how many times do i have to say this? there is no verb for spreading your chlamydia.

@maxmakesmusic: @luciwolfe wOw GuYs look at this comedienne!

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luciwolfe:

“God, people are so ugly. They’re so fucking ugly,” Lucille said, brushing off her knees where gashes dripped blood down her calves. She had to dive off her board in order to avoid getting hit by a speeding car, shoving away fussing hands. “Fuck – I’m fine. God. I’m fine, do I look like I lost my legs? I can still walk.”

Max put his hands up in surrender, walking away slowly from the girl. “Jesus, I was just trying to help. Calm down, killer.” the boy said before grabbing some of her stuff that had fallen. “Can I pick these up or are you going to yell at me for that as well?”

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📲 open

brennan: bro come thru, you got an idea?

max: i'm thinking some more music paraphernalia?

max: i already got the big ass piano

[fvckmax-thomas-blog]

@luciwolfe: i just brawled a sorority girl from CSU outside the pub. #indestructible

@maxmakesmusic: @luciwolf *claps*