Aqua Utopia｜海の底で記憶を紡ぐ
Not today Justin
PUT YOUR BEARD IN MY MOUTH
Andulka
ellievsbear
祝日 / Permanent Vacation
we're not kids anymore.
will byers stan first human second
tannertan36
i don't do bad sauce passes
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Alisa U Zemlji Chuda
dirt enthusiast
cherry valley forever
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Love Begins
★
Claire Keane
roma★
NASA
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@g00d-soup
Little old Italian lady: Do you have zucchini?
Me: Yes, right here.
Lady: Is how much?
Me: $2.99 a pound.
Lady: It's usually $1.49.
Me: Yes, in the summer.
Lady, pauses, then grabs two: I put it in a soup.
Me: Oh nice, what kind are you making?
Lady: You will not fantasize about my soup.
And then she walked away. "You will not fantasize about my soup" will be in my head forever. I love you, little old Italian lady.
how it feels to add ingredients to your cup ramen
my adventures in soup are taking me to beautiful places
ℹ️ You cannot check your Soup Status during combat.
I love you miso soup. Miso soup please cure my ailment I love you
[Image Description:
Text that reads, "I'm actually veryyyy big into the stock market." Over lots of pictures of soup stock in various pots.
/End I.D.]
soup will always be there for you
I’m tired of being sick I need a direct pipeline to the hot soup store where I can get hot soup funneled into my mouth whenever I so please
Ate some soup. God I want more soup. Life is a delivery method for soup. Soup. Yummy. Soup.
Ok*reduces you to a simmer* go rest for a while
a lot on my mind right now (broths)
[ID: 4 close up photos of various vegetables, beans, spices, and aromatics floating in liquid, ready to be simmered into broths. End ID]
This post has soup in it!! Very good.
a few days since the latest Goblin incident
my village no longer shuns me. ever since i drove the Goblins out they have all accepted me as their prophet and are letting me back into the church again. so that is nice. :)
the Soup God still won't talk to me. i am not sure i want to talk to It though, tbh. i am just grateful that i managed to drive @the-evil-stew-goblin away without having to open the—
wait a minute. what's all that noise outside?
HAHAHAHA GET FLANKED! TWICE!!! GOBO ARMY ON ALL SIDES, SOUP PROPHET!!!
(The EVIL stew goblin shouts with glee atop a massive stack of mushroom minions piled together as a form of moving chariot. It is quite impressive, seeing as most of them have no hands and thus nothing to hold on with.)
THE RADIATION HAS SUBSIDED, MY MINIONS! CHARGE!!!
"oh... oh fuck. oh FUCK!" i yelled, watching through my living room window in horror as the Goblin army formed up outside the village gates.
there were too many of them. way too many. the villagers were outnumbered two to one, easily.
where had the Evil Stew Goblin even found this many people?? i had thought he was just like a mob boss or something. but no! as it turned out, he was also some sort of a general or something!
alas! i had realized it too late. and now there was a whole fucking army breaking down the gates of my village!
panicked, i ran outside. other villagers were doing the same, including the cobbler Vesuvius, and others who have requested that i not put their names on my tumblr blog. they ran from their houses, armed with whatever makeshift weapons were at their disposal—scythes and pitchforks, chains and spiked clubs, etc.—and gathered in my front yard before me.
"rodrigo!" cried Vesuvius, carrying a sawed-off 12-gauge. "this army is too great. we cannot hope to defend against it. please! you must let us lay down our arms, and let the power of our God defend us!"
"i know, Vesuvius, i know," i said, and sighed, for my heart was heavy. "i know that i must do this thing." i addressed the rest of the crowd: "all of you, go back inside! protect yourselves. the power of your God will defend you... but that power can still hurt you. so, go, now! go and hide!"
and, scrambling to obey, they obeyed, and ran back to their houses.
Is that the stupid THERMOS again?! I can’t believe you’d tell the SAME BAD JOKE TWICE!! (The goblin yells triumphantly from the stack)
GO ON, SOUP PROPHET!! SHOW US THE POWER OF YOUR “mobile hot liquid container”
(the goblin makes quotations with his hands in a mocking tone. His pride has easily gone to his head, as well as his blood as the stack stops suddenly, flinging him to the ground directly in front of Rodrigo)
HEY! WATCH WHERE YOU’RE WALKING! YOU ALMOST SQUISHED ME, YOU LEFTOVERS!!
(The EVIL stew goblin turns to face Rodrigo, suddenly pensive, eyes wide as he watches Rodrigo’s next move.)
"well, well, well, Evil Stew Goblin," i said, narrowing my eyes as i faced my arch nemesis.
we stood across from each other, just a few paces apart, him armed to the teeth with his various and sundry stew-based weapons and me with only my Thermos.
i looked into his eyes, those Evil, Evil eyes, and saw within the stew of hatred that was his soul a presence of mutual respect. a deep understanding, the kind that only true rivals can have. for that was what we were. two souls bound together by the inexorable prescript of Fate.
and when i looked into the Evil Stew Goblin's Evil eyes i knew this. and he knew too. and i knew that he knew. and he knew that i knew that he knew that i knew that he knew. and i knew that he knew that i knew that he knew that i knew that he knew.
"behold!" i cried, to my enemy, and all who would hear. "a pale horse. and his name that sits on it is Death! and Hell follows him!"
and i raised the Holy Thermos, and opened the first seal... or at least, that's what i meant to do. but the Soup God was overeager, and the power of It which i channeled came out too strong. and by mistake i opened the first three seals on the Thermos.
it is an act ordained by God, i told myself.
great and terrible energies began to spew from the Thermos' broken seals—think something like colored fog, but more ethereal. and spewing out with such force that it was really less like fog and more like high-pressure steam. but instead of dissipating like steam, the energies became opaque, and swarmed upon the sky.
and the earth began to quake. the trees and the houses shook. the streetlights tottered like pendulums and came crashing down. transmission towers trembled in the distance.
and the sun became black like sackcloth of hair. and the moon appeared and became as red as blood. and the stars appeared and fell from the sky like ripe figs from a shaken tree. or actually more like meteors crashing down on earth and killing people and destroying things... because that's what they were.
and the power of the Soup God flowed through my veins; and raised me high up into the air; and i saw in my peripheral view that my fur glowed with a golden light.
"Bosses of the Goblin mafia," i intoned, speaking with the Voice of the Lord. "hide thyselves in the dens and the rocks of the mountain; and say to the mountains and the rocks, 'fall on us, and hide us from the face of him who sitteth on the throne.' for the day of his wrath is come; and who shall be able to stand?"
'from the heart of sun-ripened tomatoes ... comes America's Favorite Soup'
Advertisement for Campbell's Tomato Soup (1948).
