Summary: They've been looking for the final member of their pack for years, a ache that never fades and always exists. Only, when they finally find you, they find a version of you that has been broken. Will they be able to make you whole again?
Pairing: Stray Kids OT8 x F!Reader
A/N: I actually can't believe this is it guys... I just want to say a huge thank you for all of your support throughout this series. You all have been so sweet and supportive and more than I ever could've asked for!!! I'm so proud of this series and it was such an absolute blast to write.
Thank you for joining me on this journey <333
Groaning, you press your pillow tighter against your face. “I’m okay with being late,” you say, voice muffled by your pillow. “Actually, how about I just stay home today?”
There’s a faint chuckle and then hands are grabbing your wrists, careful fingers curling around the width of your arm and pulling. The pull is gentle but of course, you’re not really trying to fight them regardless, so with a single pull, the pillow is up and away from your face and replaced by Seungmin’s face.
There’s a faint smirk on his face as he stares down at you, brow quirked. “We both know you’ll regret staying home later.”
Pouting, you shake your head. “I guarantee you I won’t.”
“Hmm-mm,” Seungmin says. “Well, if you insist, I might have to take some extreme measures. Would you rather I pull in the big guns then?”
Your eyes widen. “You wouldn’t.”
The smirk deepens. “We both know I would.”
And for a moment, one long passing moment, it’s just silence. You and Seungmin stare back at one another, trying to bait the other one out. A million thoughts pass through your head in that moment and the most pressing is you should probably just get up. But, that smaller, louder voice says; don’t give in.
So you don’t.
“You’re bluffing.”
Seungmin’s smirk breaks out into a wide grin. Before you can blink, he’s leaning back, letting go of you and making his way out the door in record time. Your lips part as his body disappears around the corner, and instantly, you know you’ve made a grave mistake.
“Seungmin, wait! You don’t—”
“I heard someone doesn’t want to get up this morning!”
Horror strikes you as you meet Changbin’s waiting gaze, the man stepping into your room.
“Changbin,” you call, being particular in your use of his full name. “I’m getting up. You don’t have—”
Your words are cut off by a loud squeal. Instantly, it becomes impossible for you to form coherent words as giggles burst past your lips out of your control. Changbin, who’d crossed the distance over to you in seconds flat, mercilessly tickles your sides.
“St–Stop!” You gasp, kicking your feet out. “Stop! I-I’ll get up!”
You manage to maneuver yourself to your feet, batting Changbin’s hands away until finally, finally he stops. Breathless, you stand there, clothes dishevelled, hair a mess on your head and let your eyes drift from Changbin who stands in front of you grinning, to Seungmin who leans against the archway to the door, smirking.
“I told you I would.”
Huffing, you brush a piece of unruly hair from your face. “Getting Binnie involved, Minnie, really?” You roll your eyes but the smile on your face is telling. “Now, that’s taking it too far.”
Seungmin shrugs. “You wouldn’t get up.”
“What’s going on?” A new voice calls, and soon Jeongin’s head is popping in beside Seungmin’s. He takes one look at your dishevelled state and Changbin who stands next to you, and a knowing smile curls on his lips. “Did Y/N get the tickle attack?”
“She sure did,” Changbin snorts as you glower at him. “Someone wouldn’t get out of bed this morning.”
“I told her I would,” Seungmin teases.
You huff at all three of them. “Evil. The lot of you.”
“Just hurry and shower or else we really will be late.”
This time you do listen to Seungmin; mainly because you’re already up but also because you know that if you don’t, Seungmin will recruit Changbin once again. You can’t suffer through two tickle attacks today, that’d be too much.
An hour later and you’re showered, dressed and ready for the day. As you make your way into the kitchen, you’re instantly hit with a very pleasant smell.
“Lixie,” you call, pulling his eyes on you. “Did you wake up early and bake again?”
“I sure did,” the boy calls, turning away from the counter to make his way over to you. You grin as you meet his eyes, leaning your cheek towards him as he presses a warm, firm kiss at the corner of your mouth. “Brownies. Your favourite.”
Your tummy rumbles just at the mention, moving towards the table as Felix swiftly moves to do the finishing touches.
“And I’ve made a more nutritious, fulfilling breakfast. Which you should eat before brownies,” Minho says, setting a plate down for you with a small smile as you take a seat next to Hyunjin. His hand finds your thigh the second you sit down and you press a kiss to his forehead in response.
“Thank you, Lino,” you smile back up at the alpha, before looking down at your full plate. “It looks delicious.”
You’ve just taken your first bite when Changbin comes walking in with a pouting Han and a laughing Chan trailing behind him.
“You’re not the only one who needed a tickle attack this morning, princess,” Changbin hums with a shit-eating grin as Han moans behind him. “Sleepy head here wouldn’t let go of Chan until I came in.”
Han just moans louder, none of what he’s saying making any coherent sense. He sends Changbin a glare before shuffling past the man, who sends him a slap on the ass on the way. Han falls into a heap on the open seat next to you, draping himself dramatically over you.
“To be fair,” Chan pipes up, pressing a kiss to Felix’s lips as he maneuvers around the boy for a cup of coffee. “I kept him up late last night.”
Han’s cheeks burn a bright red.
“Oi,” Jeongin calls, walking into the kitchen with Seungmin; the last two to join for breakfast. “No sex talk during breakfast.”
Chan just wiggles his brows at the boy. “I didn’t see you complaining the other night, Innie.”
Jeongin turns an even brighter red than Han.
Minho drops a plate in front of Han, ruffling the boy's hair, before placing the other plate in front of Chan. The grin on his face is trouble as he turns to Chan. “And who was the one making all that noise last weekend when we spent the night together, Channie?”
Like a domino effect, Chan’s face bursts into red.
“You’re evil,” he says to Minho.
You let out a snort, finishing bringing a fork-ful of food towards Han’s lips.
“I wouldn’t be so smug, Y/Nnie,” Seungmin grins from across the table, sending a sharp wink your way.
Your eyes widen, raising your finger and pointing it right at him. “You’ve done enough this morning, Minnie.”
Seungmin just laughs.
“Was everyone having fun these past few days and I just didn’t know about it?” Hyunjin frowns from beside you. “Not cool.”
Changbin snorts and leans towards Hyunjin. The look on his face is downright lecherous; “don’t worry, Jinnie. I can keep you company tonight.”
Hyunjin doesn’t waste a second. “Gross.”
“Yah!”
“You all are animals,” Jeongin deadpans, shaking his head as he shoves a handful of food in his mouth. You watch with a quirked brow, still shocked to this day that he doesn’t choke when he eats like that.
“Enough sex talk,” Felix’s voice carries in, moving towards the table with small containers in each hand. “I’ve made you all a to-go box of brownies for a treat later today. Y/N and Han got extra because they’re special.”
You and Han turn to each other, grinning ear to ear.
“What!” Hyunjin calls, voice pitching in a whine. “That’s not fair!”
Felix just shrugs his shoulders. “Omega privilege.”
“This is discrimination,” Changbin pouts.
Jeongin nods next to him. “I agree.”
Without wasting a beat, Han sticks his tongue out at them. “You snooze, you lose.”
Changbin’s hand raises to throw a piece of food at him, but Minho’s reflexes are quicker.
“You throw that food and I’ll take your whole breakfast away.”
Changbin slumps in defeat.
One by one, Felix hands out the containers to everyone. You smile at him brightly when he hands you yours, thanking him softly. This will definitely get you through your day.
“Y/N, Seungmin and Felix,” Chan calls, pulling your eyes on him. “You all have classes today, yeah?”
Seungmin nods. “Y/N’s is earlier than mine so me and Felix are gonna go early and hang out in the library. I’ll pick up Y/N after hers and she’ll sit in on my lecture just so she’s not waiting alone.”
You groan at the thought. “Your classes are always so boring.”
“Don’t be dramatic,” Seungmin rolls his eyes.
“I like sitting in on Lixie’s more,” you shrug. “I get to eat the leftover treats.”
Felix winks at you. “I like when you sit in on my lectures too, sunny.”
Seungmin just sighs and Chan lets out a soft laugh.
“Sounds good,” he nods to Seungmin. “Me, Bin and Hannie will be at work all day so I just wanted to make sure everything else was good.”
“I can also come by and pick Y/N up after lecture,” Jeongin offers, meeting your eyes then Chan’s. “I’m finally getting caught up on my pile of homework and have got nothing else to do today.”
You turn to him with sparkling eyes. “Ah, really?”
He laughs; “if that’s okay with everyone else.”
The whole table nods and shrugs in response, until Jeongin turns to Seungmin and Chan.
“Allows me to actually focus during class,” Seungmin says and you stick your tongue out at him.
Chan nods after; “works for me.”
You grin, turning to Jeongin; “yay! Thank you, Innie.”
He flushes faintly; “of course, baby.”
“Lucky,” Hyunjin pouts from next to you. “I want Innie and Y/Nie time.”
Minho just shakes his head; “you have back to back classes to teach today.”
Hyunjin drops his head on the table; “I know! I’m so busy, I hate it.”
That you can’t blame him for. School’s been crazy recently, you know you’re feeling burnt out too.
“I feel the same, baby,” Han says, nodding sympathetically at Hyunjin. “We’ve been so busy at the studio recently.”
Changbin hums; “it has been a lot.”
“This is the first day in weeks that I’m not swamped with homework,” Jeongin frowns.
“Normally I’d call you all dramatic but I’m just as swamped,” Minho sighs.
“We’ve all been feeling this way, huh?” Chan asks, letting his eyes drift across the entire pack.
You nod. “The only thing keeping me going is the long weekend coming up.”
“Yes!” Felix practically shouts, pointing at you with excitement, “I can’t wait.”
“It will be nice,” Seungmin agrees.
Silence carries for a moment. Everyone gets carried away with the anticipation of the long weekend coming up soon. For the past few weeks, it’s been non-stop go, go, go for everyone in the pack. The house was a mess of homework, lyrics, music sheets, etc. In fact, the pack had only really been able to spend time all together during breakfast. It was your one solace for the days, knowing that at the very least, you’d be able to see your soulmates in the morning and start your day off right.
Of course, it wasn’t like you didn’t get to see them ever. You had spent the night before with Seungmin but you hadn’t seen anyone else because you two didn’t get home until late. Chan and Han, for example, had clearly spent the night together but you know Hyunjin had come home from work at seven and fell asleep instantly.
There were small, brief moments but you missed being together with everyone.
“Han-ah,” Chan calls a moment later, turning to the omega. Said boy perks up beside you at the call of his name, blinking awake given that he’d been dozing off on your shoulder two seconds ago.
“Yes, Channie-hyung?”
“The track for our client,” he starts, “is it almost done?”
Han’s brows furrow, obviously confused by the random question. Still, he nods. “I should be able to get it done today with Binnie’s help.”
Said alpha sends a thumbs up.
“Jinnie,” Chan then calls, turning to the beta. “You don’t have any classes tomorrow, right?”
Hyunjin shakes his head. “No, I’m done today after six-ish.”
“You’ll be done by tonight, Minho?”
Moving to grab the dirty dishes, Minho hums; “probably be home around ten.”
“Channie,” you call, shaking your head. “What’s going on?”
“We’ve all been swamped with work for the past few weeks. And I know I speak for all of us when I say that I’m absolutely exhausted,” he explains, to which a chorus of agreements echo around. “I know you guys have no classes tomorrow because it’s a long weekend,” he continues, eyeing you, Jeongin, Felix and Seungmin. “Do you think your homework could wait three days?”
Turning to the other three, you all share looks of similar confusion.
“Mine can wait,” Felix nods, shrugging. “It’s usually just baking anyways.”
Jeongin stands up, moving to help Minho with the dishes. “Like I said, I’ll be done with my pile of homework by today thankfully.”
Which leaves you and Seungmin.
Turning to the boy, you both nod.
“We should be good too,” Seungmin says to Chan.
“Perfect,” Chan grins, face splitting into a wide smile. “Looks like we’ll be taking a trip to the beach house this weekend!”
There’s a split moment of silence, and then, as per usual for this pack, absolute chaos breaks out.
Hyunjin is jumping to his feet with a cry of victory like he won some sort of battle only he knew about, before reaching across the table and grabbing Jeongin around the shoulders and pulling him into a crushing hug. Jeongin looks disgruntled by it, but he doesn’t fight Hyunjin either as he’s smothered by kisses and the smile is telling on his face.
Changbin is grinning at Felix who’s beaming back at him with just as much excitement. Han has moved to practically throw himself on Chan, arms locked around the older man's shoulders and pressing kisses against his cheek.
And, in typical Minho and Seungmin fashion, they share small smiles of their own.
Laughing at the chaos, you turn to Chan, only to find his eyes already on you.
“We can finally have the vacation you’ve always deserved.”
Lips parting, Chan’s words surprise you, just briefly, touched by the sincerity and meaning behind them.
And then, a soft smile curls onto your own lips.
“I look forward to it.”
That night, you all drive over to the beach house and after resting for the night, you spend the entire next day together.
After a nice lunch spent together, you all head out to the beach. This time round, you have no reservation about thrusting yourself into the water the second you lay eyes on it. You have fun playing around and messing with the boys and even manage to drag Minho into the water for a little bit (which is something you’re secretly very proud of; knowing he can’t resist your charms).
After the beach, everyone heads in to shower and get dressed for dinner. You all decide to go out for dinner and give Minho a break from cooking, which is a special treat since it isn’t often all nine of you go out for dinner together. Then, when you get back home, you all settle into the living room and watch a movie. This time it’s Han who wins the pick, and he chooses a cute, whimsical animated movie for everyone to watch.
Everyone was now currently cuddled together in a large pile just softly chatting with one another.
You elected to remain silent, content just watching them as they laughed and chatted with one another. It had been a wonderful day, a day spent with your pack, playing, laughing and simply just being together. You loved days like these, cherished them, even more so because it was rare all of you got to be together at once in this way. No worries of work or stress of school or things to do.
Just… being together.
You watch as Hyunjin smothers Jeongin in kisses as the boy desperately tries to block them (unsuccessfully). Or how Han has curled himself around Minho, head nestled into the crook of his neck, both of them sharing content, fond smiles. Felix is laughing as Seungmin teases Changbin, trying to egg the alpha on.
Then, you catch Chan’s gaze. He’s already looking at you, a soft smile on his lips. You were curled in his lap, his arms wrapped around your waist as you leant against his chest.
You hadn’t known he’d been watching you.
“What?” You ask, smiling up at him.
Chan shrugs; “nothing.” He whispers. “Just admiring how beautiful you are.”
Cheeks flushing, you nudge him; “oh hush.”
Chan just laughs; “what? It’s true.”
You roll your eyes, but the warmth on your cheeks and the smile on your lips doesn’t fade.
And for a moment, you let the silence follow, letting your eyes drag across the pack once more.
Then, turning back to Chan, you reach for his hand. His eyes follow your movement, confused, but lets you thread your fingers through his own.
“I’m so happy,” you say.
Blinking, Chan’s lips part. His eyes search yours, letting your words sink in, and then, his hand is squeezing your own in return.
“You are?” He asks, as if he needs the reassurance.
“I am,” you assure, nodding. “I’ve never been this happy.”
“Neither have we.”
It isn’t Chan who responds, but Changbin. Blinking, you turn, meeting Changbin’s eyes as he smiles at you. When you look across the rest of the pack, everyone is smiling at you too.
“You make us whole, sunny,” Felix says, voice soft and gentle.
“And we’re so proud of how far you’ve come,” Minho adds.
You feel your vision blur, happy tears welling in your eyes as you stare back at them all. Chan pulls you closer, hugging you as Hyunjin leans forward to cup your cheek.
It’s moments like these, even a whole year later, you’re reminded of how far you truly have come. You still have your bad days, of course, but its nothing like before. You’ve grown and healed and you're proud of how hard you’ve worked to do so. And most importantly, how your pack has been there for you every single step of the way.
Without them, you wouldn’t be who you are.
You wouldn’t have found yourself.
And that meant more to you than anything.
“I wouldn’t have been able to do it without you guys.”
It’s true. The pack always tells you how strong you are, how proud they are of you and you appreciate it. You know you are strong.
But they’re the ones who’ve made you strong.
“I mean that,” you say. “I’m strong but I’m stronger because of you guys. Being with you all, being in this pack, it’s what gave me the strength to heal.”
Brushing your hair behind your ear, Chan presses a kiss to your forehead.
“We feel the same.”
Eyes fluttering shut, you lean into his touch. “And now we can spend the rest of our lives together.”
Summary: They've been looking for the final member of their pack for years, a ache that never fades and always exists. Only, when they finally find you, they find a version of you that has been broken. Will they be able to make you whole again?
Pairing: Stray Kids OT8 x F!Reader
Chapter TW. Angst, prejudice against omegas, etc. and also FLUFF
You think your heart might beat out of your chest.
Your hands haven’t stopped trembling since you woke up this morning.
This was it. This was the day you went in front of a judge, in front of Seojun, and told your story in the hopes that it would put Seojun away for a long, long time. In the hopes that someone would listen to you, an omega, testify against an alpha and actually believe you.
There was no way this went well.
You’re pulled from your thoughts at the feeling of a hand pressing against your shoulder. It makes you jump, shock traveling from your feet all the way up your body. But then you catch sight of Chan’s familiar gaze, and instantly calm.
“Sorry,” you breathe, twisting your hands in front of you. You know you probably look like a nervous wreck, but you don’t bother to hide it — you are a nervous wreck.
And you know that neither Chan or any of the boys will judge for it. They've spent the past few days trying to assure you and tell you how proud they were of you for taking this step. If there's anybody you know will be there for you, it's any one of the boys.
“Don’t apologize, baby,” Chan assures, smiling warmly at you. “I just came to check on you. The rest of the boys are waiting for you and wanted to come but we didn’t want to overwhelm you. So, they sent me. But I can grab someone else if you need, maybe Hannie or Lix?”
You shake your head. Chan was perfect. Anyone of them would be. And even though you loved the boys and knew they meant well, you’d probably lose your mind further if you were surrounded by all of them right now. You could barely think, let alone anything else.
Chan was your pack alpha. Strong, reliable, warm and understanding. Him just standing next to you was enough to make you feel the slightest bit better.
Letting out a shaky exhale, you turn to Chan. “I think I’m freaking out.”
“That’s okay,” Chan says, moving to stand in front of you. He presses both of his hands to your shoulders, holding you steady, and meets your gaze head on. “It’s okay to be nervous. But remember that we’re all there for you. We’ll be in the audience the entire time.”
Inhaling sharply, you nod.
“Jeongin and Seungmin already testified, yeah?” He reminds. It was true, just yesterday you’d been here, only in the audience, as Jeongin and Seungmin testified against Ha-joon and Jung. That had gone well and they’d been found guilty rather instantly. Still, that was with a beta and an alpha testifying, not an omega.
Not you.
Chan squeezes your shoulders, noticing you’d drifted off to your mind and pulls your attention back on him. “Remember how we sat there for them? How we were there the whole time?"
“Of course,” you agree.
“That’s exactly how it’ll be for you." Chan smiles gently, "if you ever get nervous or lose your train of thought or panic, just look for us, yeah? If Seojun does something or his lawyer asks you a question that scares you, just find us.”
Meeting Chan’s gaze head on, you swallow thickly. “Just look for any of you?”
“Any of us,” Chan assures. “We’re with you, Y/N. Always.”
“We’ll now call witness Y/N Y/L/N to the stand.”
Everything in your body freezes the second you hear your name. Your lawyer, Eun, the one who Chan had hired and who had been helping you prep your case for the last few weeks, turns to you the second your name is called. Seeing the panic in your eyes, she smiles softly, reaching out and squeezing your hand underneath the desk.
You nod, appreciating the gesture and take one last deep breath in. You’re not even aware that you’re standing until your feet are already carrying you towards the stand. Instinctively, your head turns towards the audience section of the courtroom. All eight of your soulmates sit there, already staring at you. Each one sends a reassuring smile your way. You see Chan mouth ‘you’ve got this’ and Jeongin nods at you encouragingly. Felix is smiling at you, and Han is giving you a warm, steady eye contact to let you know he’s there. Changbin is sending you a thumbs up and Hyunjin is beaming at you with a proud smile. Seungmin is mouthing ‘we’re right here’ and Minho is just staring at you with those calm, careful eyes.
It helps settle your racing heart just a little.
You move towards the stand, taking a seat and grasping your hands to stop the violent way they tremble.
The second you sit, however, you catch Seojun’s gaze. He’s staring at you from his place next to his lawyer. His gaze is heavy, dark, eyes narrowed in dangerous slits but that isn’t what scares you the most. It’s the smile on his face. Faint, but there. The edges of his lips curled upwards as he looks at you like he already expects to walk free after this.
He doesn’t think you can do it. The thought occurs to you then. He thinks you’ll panic, mess up your story, maybe even somehow, someway advocate for him. You’re sure the sick fuck thinks it’s possible. That he’s got you so wrapped around his power that you’d do it.
He’s confident, not an ounce of doubt or fear that this won’t end with him walking free.
And for a moment you panic, and the thought that he’s right, that he will walk free after this strikes such terror through your body you can’t breathe. You’ll mess up and if you don’t mess up, there’s no way the court will believe you because you’re just an omega. And if they do somehow believe you, Seojun will still walk free because somehow, someway, his dad will make sure he does.
You'll never be free from him. This will never end.
Then, Chan’s voice echoes in your mind:
“If you ever get nervous or lose your train of thought or panic, just look for us, yeah? If Seojun does something or his lawyer asks you a question that scares you, just find us.”
Inhaling sharply, you look past Seojun, eyes instantly moving towards where you know they all are. You’d just seen them, just looked for them, and seeing them again, seconds later, is undeniably reassuring. Every single one of them, looking at you, is there for you. Seungmin on the far left, then Changbin, Hyunjin, Felix, Han, Minho, Jeongin and lastly Chan. Chan who’s looking at you with such pride and adoration that that cruel smile from Seojun fades to the back of your mind in seconds.
Your pack was here for you. And with them you could do anything.
Everything moves fast after that.
After swearing the oath to tell nothing but the truth and only the truth, the questions start then.
There’s a brief moment where you work to find your voice, inhaling to steady your breath and hands twisting to calm your racing heart. Then, you sit back, squaring your shoulders and tell yourself you’re more confident then you actually feel. You part your lips and start to speak, even when it feels like the scariest thing you’ve ever done.
“I started dating Seojun in my last year of highschool, but I had known him since we were in elementary school. We started dating after I’d presented as an omega. He’d convinced me that we were soulmates and because I lived alone and didn’t know any better, I believed him. It was fine at first. Seojun was… sweet, attentive and I really did like him… Everything changed after we graduated.”
They call eyewitnesses to the stand after.
The only two are Jeongin and Doctor Yoon. Jeongin because he’d been there the day Seojun took you and Doctor Yoon because no one would be able to describe the abuse you’d endured better than her.
After them, it’s Seojun’s turn.
It isn’t until you see him walk up to the stand that you realize this is far more nerve wracking than when you’d taken the stand. Because there was no way Seojun would tell the truth. There was no way the words that were about to leave his mouth wouldn’t be lies; cruel and humiliating lies at that.
They ask the same standard questions they’d asked you. When did you meet, what was the nature of your relationship, that sort of thing.
Then, Seojun’s lawyer asks;
“Did the victim come with you on the date of the 19th voluntarily?”
And without a second of doubt, Seojun nods; “of course.”
It gives you pause, back straightening. You’d known he’d lie, but surely he didn’t think a lie like this would be believable? You’d explained explicitly that the day Seojun had taken you, they’d threatened Jeongin to force you to comply.
Jeongin had said the same thing.
“Objection,” Eun calls, shaking her head. “My client explicitly stated that she was taken forcefully.”
“We have audio evidence,” Seojun’s lawyer cuts in immediately.
Everyone turns to the judge. With a sigh, he nods.
The lawyer moves, putting the audio tape to the speaker. You sit forward with bated breath, brows furrowed in confusion. You had no idea what evidence they could even be talking about.
Then, your voice carries across the room. Your voice, weak and broken but clear as day;
“I’ll go with you, alpha. I’ll be your omega.”
Your eyes widen. You remember saying that, of course you did. But that was after Seojun had threatened to hurt Jeongin more, and had threatened to basically kill him. Of course, that part had been cut from the audio clip.
Eun scoffs; “that’s it? That could’ve easily taken that audio clip of Ms. Y/L/N out of context!”
“It’s her voice clearly,” Seojun’s lawyer says, shaking his head. “She’s willingly submitting herself as an omega to him in the recording.”
Panicked, you glance back at the pack. Sure enough, there are varying faces of concern and anger brewing on each of their faces. Chan looks ready to get up and kill Seojun himself and Jeongin, who’d experienced that moment with you, looks no different.
Swallowing thickly, your nails dig into your thighs.
“I feel it’s important to mention in addition to the audio the most glaring piece of evidence here,” Seojun’s lawyer continues and you feel his sharp eyes fall on you, piercing. You know that look. He looks at you like you’re nothing, like you’re below him. “Your honour, the witness is an omega. My client is an alpha. Unless we’ve all forgotten basic biology, the answer is obvious. Ms. Y/L/N would not be able to resist Mr. Kang simply because she is an omega and he is an alpha.”
“Objection!” Eun calls, slapping her hand on the desk. The action makes you flinch violently. “Your honour, it has been proven in many cases that basic biology does not account for simple submission. Ms. Y/L/N’s status as an omega has nothing to do with this and certainly doesn’t mean that it overrides her right as a human being to consent. Mr. Kang forced his power as an alpha over my client unwillingly.”
“Except Ms. Y/L/N has said herself that she did not know how to properly identify her soulmates. If he was her soulmate, then every action taken by Mr. Kang would be fully within his right as her alpha. Who is to say Mr. Kang is not her soulmate?”
“Because the pack sitting in the audience is physical proof that he is not.”
“Who’s to say Ms. Y/L/N was simply not just convinced by them once again?”
Biting your lip, you glance down at your lap, shoulders hunched in on yourself. You can feel your pack looking at you, can feel the anger radiating off of them, can feel it in the marks lining your neck. But you can’t look at them. Not now.
You knew your subgender would be brought up. You knew it would. But that didn’t mean hearing it used against you hurt any less.
“Order,” the judge's voice cuts through, silencing both yours and Seojun’s lawyer. “Let’s continue with the questioning, unless you have more evidence to provide?”
So, the questioning continues. This time, you keep your gaze lowered. You know your pack is still looking at you, but you just can’t seem to gather the courage to look back at them. As Seojun continues to spout more and more lies about you, about what your relationship was, the small bit of hope you’d started with is dwindling bit by bit.
“And really, any time I laid a hand on her was only to remind her of her place.”
“She never rejected sex with me. In fact, I think she secretly liked it rough.”
“She’s an omega after all. What does she know about what she wants?”
By the end of his testimony, it’s taking everything in you not to burst out in tears. The only reason you haven’t is because if you do, then Seojun really will have won.
Instead, you dig welts into your legs and listen to Seojun say horrible, demeaning things about you, your subgender and your value as a human being.
When he sits back by his lawyer, it occurs to you that this is it. Both lawyers will have the final chance to summarize their argument and then the judge will make his decision.
The decision that will decide the rest of your life.
Eun sets her hand on your arm, pulling your eyes on her. You expect her to look at you with sympathy, an admittance you both know is the reality; that Seojun will be decided not guilty. But instead, she’s looking at you with determination.
Leaning forward, she lowers her voice; “I promised you that I would win this case for you the day we met, do you remember that?”
Blinking, surprised, you slowly nod. “Yes, of course.”
You remembered that day perfectly. Saem, the cop that had asked you the questions that day in the hospital, had personally recommended Eun. A close friend, he'd called her, and a damn good lawyer.
When you'd met her a few days later with Chan, Jeongin and Seungmin, whilst being a nervous wreck, she'd set her hands on your shoulders in the midst of the meeting, looked you right in the eye and said;
"I'll make sure he pays for everything he ever did to you."
You believed her then. You still want to believe her now.
“I promised Chan that I wouldn’t let him walk free,” she continues. “And I meant it. I don’t lose cases. And I won’t lose this one. But in order to win, I need you to go back on the witness stand.”
Eyes widening, your lips part; “what?”
“Just… trust me,” she says, squeezing your arm. “Trust that Chan wouldn’t have gotten a lawyer that wouldn’t do everything in her power and ability to help you.”
You glance to your right, finding your pack staring at the two of you with furrowed brows, except for Chan. There isn’t confusion or shock on his face. He’s smiling at you, nodding. Like he understood the conversation without ever having heard it.
Whatever your lawyer was talking about, he knew.
So, with that, you turn back to her.
You trusted Chan. You trusted your pack.
You trusted Eun.
“Okay.”
Eun smiles at you.
“Your honour,” she calls, standing up. “I’d like to call Ms. Y/L/N to the stand.”
“What?” Seojun’s lawyer calls, also standing. “Objection. She already stated her testimony.”
Eun simply ignores him, looking directly at the judge. “Please, your honour. There is one last statement and one last question I’d like to ask her.”
There’s a beat of silence.
“Permission granted.”
Seojun's lawyer scoffs but Eun only nods, turning to you with a soft, reassuring smile.
Five minutes later and you’re back on the witness stand, your lawyer standing right in front of you.
“Ms. Y/L/N,” she calls, “I’d like you to tell me what meeting your soulmates for the first time felt like.”
Blinking, your lips part.
“Objection,” Soejun’s lawyer calls immediately. “What is the relevance?”
Eun wastes no time. “You questioned the validity of Ms. Y/L/N’s ability to identify the difference between meeting her soulmates and being manipulated to believe she had.” She explains, before turning to the judge. “I believe letting Ms. Y/L/N explain the difference is all the proof you need.”
You turn to the judge, freezing when his eyes fall on you. He isn't smiling nor does he looked mad, the expression on his face is completely neutral. It makes your chest tighten with anxeity.
After a moment, he nods.
“Objection ignored,” he says. “Continue.”
Eun turns to you, her eyes reassuring and with a sharp inhale, you move to speak.
“Meeting my pack felt like… finally feeling whole,” you start, thinking back to that day. The day Han, Felix and Chan had found you in that park. You’d been scared, distressed but the second Felix had touched you, you’d felt it immediately. “I was upset because I had just run away from Seojun. I… wasn’t thinking clearly, I was scared and upset. But then Felix, one of the omegas in my pack, he touched me. Set his hand on my arm and it felt like… electricity coursing through my veins."
Looking up from your hands, you let your gaze fall on Eun. "It felt like that the first time all of them touched me.”
Eun nods, smiling softly, knowingly. “And how does your pack treat you?”
“Objection!” Seojun’s lawyer calls, huffing.
“Ignored,” the judge says instantly, waving his hand at him before turning to you once again. You turn him in surprise and that hope, just faintly, comes back.
“Like I matter,” you say after a moment, turning back to your lawyer. “They treat me like I’m… more than just my subgender. Like I’m a human being with emotions and wants and importance. Like I matter. They’ve never once made me feel less than them. I was… never treated like with Seojun.”
“And how do you know they’re your soulmates?”
You hesitate a moment, thinking — how do you know? But then you think, really think, and realize the answer is obvious.
You raise your head, looking Eun right in the eyes and smile so genuinely, so full of adoration.
“Because I loved them the moment I met them.”
Your words hang in the air for a moment. Distantly, you hear a chorus of gasps. As your eyes flicker past Eun, past Seojun, you find your pack. They’re staring at you like the words you’ve just said are everything they’ve been waiting to hear and more.
With tears welling in your eyes, you smile at them.
Nodding, Eun says she has one last question.
“And how do you know Mr. Kang is not your soulmate?”
Inhaling sharply, your gaze trails, and before you can stop yourself you find yourself meeting Seojun’s waiting gaze. There’s rage burning through his eyes, his fists clenched and his lips curled into a nasty snarl as he stares back at you.
Once that look would’ve petrified you, but in that moment, you feel a sense of empowerment.
Liberation.
“Because I never loved him,” you say finally. “Because everything he did to me he only ever did for himself. Because he hurt me, beat me, raped me… because he thought that that was his right as an alpha. Because he thought that he owned me just because I was an omega. I didn’t feel like a human with him, I felt like a possession. I felt broken.”
Turning to the judge, Eun nods, satisfied;
“That’s all, your honour.”
You sit up the second the judge steps back into the room.
“The court will now deliver its verdict.”
This was it.
This was the moment that would decide everything.
You lean forward, breath caught in the back of your throat, as the judge sits, and turns to the rest of the court.
His lips part and you swear time slows down.
“The court finds the defendant guilty of…”
Then, time stops. That hope from before floods you with undeniable relief.
“Unlawful imprisonment, assault resulting in injury, sexual assault by means of violence or intimidation, and abuse of authority.”
Your eyes are welling with tears before you even realize it. The tears finally stream then, falling across your cheeks, beyond your control. But they’re not tears of sorrow or fear, they’re tears of happiness.
Of relief.
“The court hereby sentences the defendant to eight years of imprisonment.”
The judge says more but the words start to fade in the back of your mind as the thoughts race. You can hardly believe it. You won. You actually won.
It’s not life and it’s not forever, but it’s more than you thought you’d ever get.
You hadn’t even thought the court would find him guilty.
The second the judge finishes speaking, you’re turning to Eun, tears streaming down your cheeks and a smile curling onto your lips. You’re pulling her into your arms before she can even say anything, practically sobbing against her.
“Thank you,” you breathe, “thank you so much.”
Squeezing you in return, Eun smiles; “I told you I don't lose cases.”
The comment makes you laugh. A wet, relieved laugh as you pull back, shaking your head.
“Eight is less than I wanted,” she admits, nodding at you. “But it’s better than nothing. And it doesn’t mean the fight is over. I'll make sure he pays for what he did to you, Y/N. But most importantly, I want you to make me a promise.”
Blinking through the tears, you nod; "anything."
"Promise me you'll start living," she smiles, soft and gentle.
Her words stun you, your lips parting. It somehow hadn't even crossed your mind that all this time, all these years, you haven't been living.
You've just been existing.
But now... now you could.
Swallowing thickly, you squeeze her hand. "I promise."
Eun smiles, bright and relieved; “I—”
“This is bullshit!”
Lips parting, your eyes widen, you and Eun both turn to Seojun who has stood up in his rage. His face is split in anger as the police step towards him, handcuffs in hand, but he’s turning to you.
You freeze the second his eyes fall on you.
“This is your fault,” he hisses, voice a growl as his eyes blaze back at you. “A fucking omega! That’s what you are! You fucking bitch! I’ll kill you! I swear I’ll kill you!”
His lawyer is pleading with him to stop and the reason is obvious enough as you see the look on the judge's face. The disgust and contempt.
The police grab him before he can do anything, forcing him to the table and handcuffing him. You watch with parted lips as his hands are forced behind his back and then he’s led across the courtroom. He continues to fight the police holding him, screaming profanities and swearing his father will make them all pay, all while you watch him.
You don’t take your eyes off of him once. Not until he’s taken out of the room and the only thing you can hear is his echoing voice carrying down the hall.
You’ve never seen Seojun lose his cool like that. Never. Not even when you did fight him, not even when you ran away.
It was… liberating somehow.
You’re smothered in kisses and hugs the second you step out of the courtroom. You barely even take the full step before it happens but the second it does, all you do is laugh because really, you wouldn’t have it any other way.
“Make sure she can breathe, you guys,” Chan laughs, standing a little further back as he watches his pack smother you in kisses with a bright smile.
“It’s okay,” you giggle, smiling at him. “I don’t mind.”
“Good,” Felix calls from beside you. “Because I don’t plan on stopping myself from kissing you until… maybe a week from now.”
Everyone laughs, shaking their heads at Felix as he leans close, pressing multiple kisses against your cheek.
“Might need to stop to eat,” Changbin grins. “And sleep.”
Felix just shrugs; “I’ll do without it.”
Han laughs from your other side. “Don’t forget me!” He calls, pressing kisses to your other cheek. “I want cuddles and kisses!”
Seungmin snorts. “I bet you anything they’ll be the first to fall asleep when we get home.”
“Hey!”
“Are you doing okay, Y/N?” Minho asks as the laughter from everyone slowly fades, meeting your eyes.
You just smile. “I’m better than I’ve been in a long time.”
He smiles back at you.
“We’re so proud of you, bambi,” Hyunjin coos, ruffling your hair affectionately. “So, so proud of you.”
You meet his eyes, biting your lip. “Thank you, Hyun.”
Then, letting your gaze drift across the rest of them, you nod. “It helped knowing you guys were there.”
“Of course,” Jeongin says immediately. “We’ll be there for you, always.”
And you know he means it from the bottom of his heart.
“I still can’t believe it,” you breathe, letting out a shaky breath. “I can’t believe we actually won.”
“He deserves a lifetime,” Chan says, frowning faintly. “And I’m sorry there isn’t more we can do to make that possible.”
You shake your head. “I expected him to walk free, Chan,” you admit. “Eight is more than enough for me. And you’ve all done more than enough.”
“Still,” Seungmin pipes up, turning to you. “What you said there at the end…” And his voice trails, like he can’t even find the words to explain himself.
“Seungmin's right,” Jeongin nods. “That was so brave of you.”
Changbin presses his hand against your back. “And if it wasn’t obvious, we feel the same.”
“We love you so much,” Felix says.
“More than you’ll ever know,” Han adds, nodding.
You smile at each and everyone of them.
“I love you all too.”
“You ready to head home, baby?” Chan asks, squeezing your hand.
“More than ready,” you nod. “I want to cuddle in the den nest all night.”
Summary: They've been looking for the final member of their pack for years, a ache that never fades and always exists. Only, when they finally find you, they find a version of you that has been broken. Will they be able to make you whole again?
Pairing: Stray Kids OT8 x F!Reader
Chapter TW. Angst, some violence (deserved tho lets be so real) and fluff!
Word Count: 4807
A/N: Listen, I know we all wanted Seojun to die... but keep in my mind my choice for this direction is on purpose.
Your mothers smile is soft as it curls on her lips. It's weak too. She barely has the strength to hold yourself up anymore, slumped back against the hospital bed. Still, you know she's trying.
Trying for you.
"You just will," she says, voice cracking at the edges but strong with convinction. Your hands hold her own, her hand limp in your grasp, but the tips of her fingers dance across your skin like little whisps of her love. "You'll see them and it'll just click."
Face twisting, you pout. "That doesn't make any sense, eomma."
She chuckles, light and airy and then it causes a force of coughs to wrack through her body. It's heartbreaking to witness, makes your chest feel tight and your lips to curve down into a deep frown. You lean forward, pressing a hand to her back and try to steady her.
She sends you a grateful look.
"Sorry," she rasps and you shake your head. "I know it doesn't make sense, baby. But it's how it is."
You inhale sharply. "So when I see them, I'll just... know? Like some feeling that'll wash over me?"
"Yeah," she breathes. "Like a feeling. I can't wait for you to experience that feeling, Y/N."
But you won't be here to see it.
You hate that you think it. Hate that it comes before you can stop it and then pings in your head like an irritating annoyance you can't get rid of. It's loud, pressing and makes you feel bitter, angry. But there's no one to be angry at.
"Did you feel that way with dad?"
You don't often ask about him. When you were younger, you used to ask all the time and your mother did her best. As you got older though, you registered the pained look that would pass over her face; the twist of her lips, the wince, the heartbreak that flooded her eyes. So, you stopped asking.
You didn't want her to hurt anymore.
You want to know, now, though. Because you don't think you'll get another chance.
"Yeah," she whispers, and it's the saddest you've heard her sound. "I did."
You squeeze her hand. "So, somewhere out there is someone meant for me?"
She nods. "Someone or someone's."
Your brows furrow, head tilting. "Someone's?"
"Some have more than one," she smiles, nodding at you. "A friend from highschool had four."
"Oh," you say because it sounds odd. You thought having just one, one person who was made for you, who would love you no matter what, was lucky enough.
Your mother shifts then and your lips part, calling for her in concern. She shakes her head, determined, and then her hand is squeezing over your own in a way you haven't felt in months. Her face is right in front of you own, and she's smiling in that way that makes you miss her even though she's not yet gone.
"One or four or eight," she says. "Doesn't matter. All that matters is they'll love and protect you, Y/N."
Lips parting, you stare back at her, into her eyes and feel like you could cry.
"They'll love and protect you for me."
You hear the sound of Seojun’s nose breaking before you see it; the sickening crunch that echoes through the room.
He cries out in pain, falling to the ground pitifully as his hands come to cup his bleeding nose. You sit there, shaking, heart racing, as Chan stands over Seojun, towering over him, looking the angriest you’ve ever seen him.
He takes a step towards Seojun, fist raised, but then suddenly there’s another body in front of you.
It’s Hyunjin.
“Baby,” Hyunjin breathes, eyes trailing across your face. His expression twists when he sees your scraped and bleeding chin and the bright red bruise across your cheek. His hands are trembling in front of him, as if he’s not sure if he’s allowed to touch you or not.
You just sink into his touch, desperate to feel his warmth, falling against him.
His arms wrap around you in seconds, pulling you close. You sob into his neck, relief flooding you as the pain finally catches back up to you. You’re exhausted, more than exhausted, and you’re so happy to see Hyunjin.
You never thought you'd see any of them again.
“It’s okay, baby. You’re okay. We’ve got you,” Hyunjin whispers to you, running his hands through your hair. “We got you.”
He holds you for a moment, rocking you. He pulls you close, trying to cover you, and then just as his lips part to say something, the sound of Chan’s voice interrupts him.
“You sick son of a bitch,” Chan hisses, voice low and threatening. You’ve never heard him sound so angry. Slowly, through teary eyes, you glance up from Hyunjin’s shoulder. He attempts to pull you back, obviously not wanting you to see it, but you shake your head.
You need to see this.
Chan is tall and intimidating in front of you. Broad shoulders, back turned to you, fists clenched by his sides and dripping with blood. He should be terrifying—the you from just a few weeks ago would've been petrified. Would've cowered and cried and Chan's face wouldn't have been his own but rather Seojun's because he was the reason alphas were terrifying to you.
He is terrifying. Unhinged and filled with fury. But you're not scared, not even a little.
You feel loved and protected.
You feel safe.
“I could kill you.”
Seojun laughs. Laughs. It feels like poison to you. You grip Hyunjin tighter.
“Then kill me,” Seojun huffs, blood spilling down his face. “If not, then that means you just don’t have the guts to.”
And it’s silent for one long moment. Thick and stifling where no one says anything. Then, Chan shifts on his feet, the fist he’d sent flying into Seojun’s face trembles by his side, bloodied and bruised. It trembles with the strain of holding himself back.
You know then Chan could. He could kill Seojun. A part of him probably wants to and you think, realistically, a small part of you wouldn't be upset if he did. Not for Seojun, at least.
You would be for Chan though. Because that's not who he is. Chan isn't capable of such cruelty—the type of cruelty Seojun was capable of.
No, Chan is different. Softer, kinder. Protective in a warm way, not oppressive. All of the boys were different.
Where Seojun was dismissive, Chan was uplifting. Where Seojun was controlling, Minho was guiding. Where Seojun was oppressive, Changbin was comfortable. Where Seojun was cruel, Hyunjin was kind. Where Seojun was violent, Han was loving. Where Seojun was cold, Felix was warm. Where Seojun was insulting, Seungmin was uplifting. Where Seojun was demanding, Jeongin was understanding.
Where Seojun was a prison, the pack was your home.
And so, curled in Hyunjin's arms, you wait with bated breath as the next words leave Chan's lips.
“Death would be too easy,” Chan growls. “We’re gonna make sure you spend the rest of your life in jail. I’ll make sure you pay for hurting my soulmates, for touching my pack.”
Almost instantly, relief floods you, crashes over you like a warm blanket. His words, simple adn true, mean the absolute world to you.
Seojun just shakes his head. “I’d kill me while you still have the chance,” he says, “because the police won’t be able to keep me in a cell for long. Not when my dad can just pay them off. And when he does, you’ll wish you'd have killed me.” He shifts his gaze and you freeze when his eyes land on you. “You’ll never escape me, Y/N.”
You let out a whimper, knuckles turning white from how tightly you’re gripping onto Hyunjin. He pulls you closer as a response, a low growl leaving his lips. Then, another shadow falls in front of you both.
It’s Changbin.
“The police are here,” Changbin says, glaring down at Seojun. “I’ll bring him up.”
Changbin steps forward, grabbing Seojun by the back of his neck and all but hauling him up. Seojun fights his grasp but Chan has done a number on him and Changbin’s strong that it doesn’t really make a difference.
There's a moment where Changbin just stands there, staring at him. Then, his fist is reeling back and smacking Seojun across the face. Changbin holds him in place, not letting him fall, and stares him down as his knuckles send his face flying to the side. His face is a mixture of blood, snot and tears, mangled and bruised.
You can tell, can see it on Changbin's face, he wants to do more. But, his other hand just tightens around Seojun's neck and he turns, moving to drag him up the steps.
Changbin is purposefully not gentle, smacking the man around more as he drags him.
You watch him be led up the stairs. His eyes never leave you once.
“Y/N…”
It’s Chan.
Blinking, you turn to him. He’s crouched in front of you, not a trace of that rage left on his face as he stares down at you in concern. His eyes trace across your injuries and then, down, frowning.
“Here, baby,” he says, leaning back to pull his jacket off. Hyunjin lets go of you just enough for Chan to pull the jacket around you. His smell envelopes you, instantly easing you. Once it’s properly wrapped around you, your hands instinctively reach out for Chan. He pulls you into his arms, Hyunjin’s hand falling to your back so you know he’s still there.
“Is Innie okay?” You whisper, meeting Chan’s eyes. You need to know, he hasn't left your mind since Seojun had taken you. Left there, all alone, hurt and bleeding because of you. You wouldn't be able to take it if he wasn't. “He’s okay, right?”
“He’s okay, baby girl,” Chan whispers, brushing your hair from your face. “I promise. The rest of the pack is at the hospital with him.”
You let out a breath of relief. “I was so worried,” you cry, glancing at Chan and then Hyunjin. “They… I tried to get them to stop. They–They wouldn’t stop.”
“Shh,” Hyunjin coos, “it’s okay. It’s not your fault, baby.”
“No, it isn’t,” Chan affirms. “None of this is your fault.”
You just shakily look up at him.
Then, Chan’s face twists. “Baby, Y/N, listen to me,” he starts, briefly glancing at Hyunjin. “The police… they’ll want to talk to you. They’ll have questions.”
You freeze in his touch.
“They’ll also need to check you for injuries.” Chan says, “I’m sorry. I know you want to go home. But it has to happen, okay?”
You want to argue, want to beg for him to make it so you don’t have to. All you want to do is go home. All you want is to be with your pack.
But you know Chan is right.
“O-Okay,” you nod.
“We’ll be there the whole time, okay?” Hyunjin reassures you, rubbing your back. “We won’t leave you for one second.”
You swallow thickly.
“Binnie’s up there,” Chan says softly. “Do you want to see Binnie?”
You do. You want to see everyone.
“Yeah,” you breathe.
“Okay,” Chan nods. He shifts backwards. “I’ll carry you, okay? We’ll take you out of here and you’ll never have to come back.”
Letting out a shaky breath, your grip on him tightens the second he pulls away. Glancing at both of them with wide eyes, there’s something you need to tell them. Your omega is begging you to.
“He… He tried to bu-burn the marks,” you whisper, voice cracking. “He… He wanted to take them away from me. I-I didn’t let him.” Suddenly turning frantic, your voice pitches. “I promise, alpha! I didn’t let them!”
“I know, baby. I know.” Chan calls, nodding at you as he wipes your tears from your face. Hyunjin’s hand on your back stills. “It’s okay. It’s okay, Y/N.”
Inhaling shakily, your grip on him never eases. “I didn’t let him.”
“Hey, hey,” Hyunjin calls, voice soft, softer than Chan’s. A whisper as he leans in behind you, pressing his chest into your back, and holds you tight. “We know, you did so well. You were so strong. We’re so proud of you, baby.”
Chan nods; “you don’t have to be strong anymore, okay? We’re here.”
Their words feel like a warm blanket; like everything you’ve been desperate to hear.
Your omega is yearning for their touch, for their comfort. You’re yearning for their comfort. You just want to let everything go. They came for you, they did—they rescued you.
Your pack saved you.
You turn limp in Chan's grasp, knowing he'll hold you. Knowing he'll keep you safe. And then he's standing, you cradled in his arms, pressed against his chest. Hyunjin stays close, hand presed against your back, lettign you know he's there and he's not going anywhere.
And then, they head for the stairs. It's simple, walking up a set of stairs, but it's liberating. It's freeing. This time, it really feels like this'll be the last time you ever have to see this place.
That basement. This house. And as Chan makes his way through the front door, Hyunjin behind you, you believe them when they promise you you're safe now.
It's a blur for a few minutes. There are police, Chan never lets go of you, not until you're set down in the back of an ambulance. Still, Chan and Hyunjin stay close. You've been given a blanket, that you wrap tightly around yourself and some spare clothes.
Then, you see him.
"Changbin!"
His name leaves your lips in a desperate call. The alpha catches it, Hyunjin and Chan turning to you in response to your call. Hyunjin moves to make room for Changbin who's started to race over to the three of you, all while Chan watches with a fond smile.
You fall into his arms the second he's close enough. The police had told you to stay off your feet, until they could do a proper check for injuries, but at the sight of one of your soulmates, you don't care. You'd seen Changbin for just a moment before and you wanted to be in his arms too.
He catches you with ease, a light huff leaving his lips from the way you'd thrown yourself at him. Hyunjin calls your name in concern and Chan's hands steady you by your hips, but you're smiling with tears in your eyes as you wrap your arms around Changbin's shoulders.
With one hand on your back and the other cradling your head, Changbin leans back to meet your eyes.
"Careful, princess," he whispers, soft and concerned. "Are you okay?"
You just pull him closer. "I am now."
Changbin, Hyunjin and Chan glance at each other. It's obvious you're not okay, not really.
"Here, baby," Hyunjin says then. "You should sit—"
You shake your head, shifting in Changbin's arms to meet his eyes and then Chan's. Your eyes are still watery, you look exhausted and all three men want nothing more than to make all the pain go away.
"Thank you," you say then, soft and sincere.
Chan blinks; "Y/N?"
"Thank you for saving me."
“That’s all the questions we have for now. Thank you.”
The cop in front of you closes his notebook with a small, reassuring smile your way. His eyes drift from you, to the three men standing around your hospital bed. After the doctor had assessed your injuries and patched you up, the police had stepped in to ask their questions. They’d requested to speak to you alone at first, but you assured them you didn’t want Chan, Hyunjin or Changbin to leave.
You never wanted them or any of your pack to leave again.
The questions were exactly what you expected; your history with Seojun, your relationship with him, the abuse he’s inflicted upon you. Some of the questions were hard to answer and you could tell they were just as hard for the cop to ask, but it had been emphasized to you that your witness statement was critical. So, despite your own discomfort and the pressing want for them to just go away and leave you alone, you’d complied.
Chan had held your hand the entire time, whilst Hyunjin and Changbin stayed close on your other side. You could tell all three of them, especially the alphas, were being particularly careful of keeping their emotions in check so as not to upset you further. You appreciated it more than they’d ever know.
You were, however, thankful the questions were done. You just wanted to forget everything. You didn’t want to think about any of it anymore.
“You have everything you need?” Chan asks from beside you, his hand still tightly held in your own as he turns to the cop. “And Seojun? Where is he?”
“In custody,” the cop assures. “He’s been questioned right now. I can assure you that he’ll end up behind bars by the end of the day.” The cop nods, turning back to you. If you were in a better state of mind, you would find the cop’s behaviour… kind. As an omega, it wasn’t often that matters of concern regarding you were ever treated as your own to deal with.
He’d been specific in asking every question to you, including making sure you were comfortable with the three of them staying in your room. He wasn’t viewing you as Chan’s omega, but as a person.
A person with your own identity.
Besides your pack, no one had ever treated you like that since you presented.
Sighing, the cop steps forward, lowering his voice. “I have to say, however,” he starts, face twisting. “That I doubt he’ll stay in there long. If it was up to me, I’d lock him up and throw the key away. But this bastard, he’s… he’s well connected.”
You inhale sharply, shoulders tense.
“Is there anything we can do?” Hyunjin asks, shaking his head. “I mean, anything at all?”
The cop huffs; “your best bet is giving the judges evidence they can’t deny. Hard proof and evidence that money can’t sweep away.”
Changbin sighs. “That’s if a judge will even listen to us.”
The cop shakes his head sympathetically. “I’ll try to help in any way I can. Here,” he opens his notebook again, writing something on it before ripping the page out. He steps directly towards you, hand stretched out with the piece of paper in your direction, a soft, reassuring smile on his face. “That’s my personal number. Just… call if you ever need anything.”
Wide eyed, you slowly reach forward, taking the piece of paper from him.
“Thank you,” you whisper. And you mean it, from the bottom of your heart.
“Of course,” he smiles at you. Then, shuffling, he steps back. He turns to leave, but hesitates, almost looking regretful as he turns back to you. “Lastly, I’d find yourselves a damn good lawyer.”
Chan sighs, but nods; “thanks, officer.”
“No problem,” he says, meeting your eyes one last time. “You get some rest.”
Biting your lip, you smile faintly at him.
He steps out, leaving the four of you alone in the room. It wasn’t like you weren’t expecting it, but the cops words were definitely not reassuring. You knew Seojun’s dad was rich, you knew he’d spent his life being spoiled and living above law because of it. You’d told Chan and the pack so yourself.
But it hurt knowing that a man who could do so much evil, could get away with it every time.
Chan crouches down next to you; “you okay, baby girl?”
“Yeah,” you nod, meeting his eyes. “As okay as I can be.”
“Are you still in a lot of pain?” Changbin frowns, standing on the other side of your bed. Hyunjin stands next to him, the two of them looking at you with similarly worried looks. “We can get the doctor to give you something for it.”
You shake your head; “they already gave me some pain medication.” You assure, “I’m okay. Just… Just tired.”
“Do you want to sleep?” Chan asks.
“No,” you whisper. “I don’t think I could even if I tried.”
Changbin’s lips part to say something, but then his phone rings, cutting him off. He hesitates, lips parting, before he’s sending you an apologetic smile, grabbing his phone. Something in his face shifts when he reaches the contact photo, and he’s sending you a brighter smile this time before moving to step out of the room.
You want to call him back, not wanting to be apart from him. In fact, it was killing you that only Chan, Changbin and Hyunjin were there. Your omega was screaming for your whole pack.
But you were trying not to be overtly needy.
“What’s going on in that pretty head of yours, baby?” Chan says.
You turn to him, then Hyunjin, and let out a shaky breath. “I… I worry what will happen when Seojun inevitably gets out.”
“That won’t happen,” Hyunjin says instantly.
“But it will,” you mumble. “It will. And when he does, I… I’m afraid of what will happen. I can’t watch another one of you get hurt, not for me. I… I can’t lose any of you.”
“Y/N,” Hyunjin whispers, face pinching. “What are you saying?”
“That…” And you hesitate, the words caught in the back of your throat. They feel wrong, but they also won’t leave your mind. “That maybe you never should’ve saved me.”
At first, you'd been relieved they'd found you. Ecstatic, even. You were so happy Chan, Changbin and Hyunjin had found you, had saved you. You'd believed you were safe.
But as you sat there in that hospital bed, checked for injuries and then asked questions about every evil thing Seojun had ever done to you, you'd remembered.
Remembered Seungmin getting hurt. Beat in front of you while you'd done nothing. Remembered Jeongin getting stabbed. Fighting and fighting to help you and then left to bleed out.
Sure, they were okay. But what would happen next time? Seojun would get out, and when he did...
"Maybe it would've been better if you never found me in the first place."
Hyunjin’s lips part and he looks like he might cry. It breaks your heart.
But then Chan’s hand is squeezing your own, urgent and firm. You turn to him, and are surprised at the look you’re met with.
“Don’t say that,” he says, shaking his head. He… He sounds angry, disappointed. “That will never be true. We promised you that we’d keep you safe. We broke that promise and for that, I’ll never forgive myself. But, please know when I say this, I say it knowing that I will never break another promise I make to you ever again.
“I will make sure that man spends the rest of his life rotting in a cell for what he’s done to you.”
There isn’t a single ounce of doubt in Chan’s voice as he says those words. He wholeheartedly believes them.
“But… the cop said—” You sigh, gaze lowering to your lap. “Seojun can just pay his way out, Chan—”
“That won’t happen,” Chan cuts in, voice firm. Your lips are left parted as you stare back at him surprise. There’s such conviction in his voice, such determination. “Doesn’t matter what it takes. The best lawyer, money, anything. We’ll do anything to ensure he never gets free and you never have to live another day in fear.”
Chan’s words hang in the air for a moment. You stare back at him, then let your gaze trail back to Hyunjin. The determination rests in his eyes too.
Chan really believes the words he says, Hyunjin does as well.
And then you do something you never thought you would; you believe them too.
“That’s right, Y/N,” Hyunjin says then, reaching for you. He brushes the tips of his fingers across your cheek, tucking hair behind your ear. “And we won’t break it.”
You feel your eyes well with tears, overwhelmed and endeared by the sincerity in their voices. In the way they’re looking at you.
“Look who I brought!”
The moment is cut by Changbin’s loud voice, startling you briefly as he comes walking back into your hospital room. Yours, Chan’s and Hyunjin’s eyes fall on him in surprise, the latter two looking ready to tell him off for being so loud. But then, there’s more voices and footsteps and a series of smells suddenly surrounding you.
It’s the pack. It’s… It’s your soulmates.
You inhale sharply, leaning forward as you let your eyes drift across them all. Changbin who’d been standing in the front steps to the side, grinning, and you see Han and Felix first whose faces break out into wide smiles at the sight of you. They’re making their way over to you, calling your name, and reaching for you as they hug you and press kisses to your face.
“Sunny,” Felix says, voice a faint whisper.
“We missed you,” Han adds, “I’m so happy you’re back with us.”
You sniffle at their words, leaning into their touches, grabbing onto them desperately. You nod, desperate for them to know you feel the same even though the words won’t leave your lips.
And then Seungmin is stepping forward, a soft, smaller but just as loving smile on his face. He reaches for your hand and you let him take it, threading your fingers through his own.
“Hi there, beautiful,” he whispers and you laugh, tears streaming down your cheeks.
Minho’s head pops up next, stepping beside Seungmin as he smiles softly at you. He doesn’t say anything, but it’s okay because his eyes say it all for him; I’m sorry, I love you, I’m so relieved you’re okay.
“Y/N,” Changbin calls, pulling your eyes away from the crowd surrounding your bed and on to where he’s standing by the door to the room. “Look.”
Your eyes trail, following the direction he’s pointing at, and then, you meet his eyes.
Jeongin’s eyes.
“Oh my god,” you breathe, the words slipping past your lips in a wet laugh as he smiles back at you. There’s a brace around his wrist and he’s got one crunch, but he looks genuinely so relieved and happy to see you that the guilt you’ve been feeling doesn’t even matter in that moment. It doesn’t matter because he’s there, right in front of you, and he’s okay.
He’s okay.
“Innie,” you call. You grab your blanket, throwing it off of you and moving to stand. Everyone around you reacts, panicking, but you’re a woman with a mission. And that mission is reaching Jeongin.
He starts to walk over to you the second he realizes you’re getting up, but you reach him first. In nothing but your hospital gown and bare feet, you stop right in front of Jeongin. You want to jump into his arms but you don’t want to hurt him more.
There’s a split second where you hover, unsure, and then Jeongin is reaching for you, pulling you into his arms. His crutch is grabbed by Changbin who sets it aside, eyeing the two of you with a warm smile.
“I’m sorry,” you cry, your tears falling once again as you hold him tight. You’d missed everyone, thought you’d never see them again – but being pulled away from Jeongin, watching him get hurt and knocked out, that had been different. “I’m so sorry.”
Jeongin presses his hand into the back of your head. “You’ve got nothing to be sorry for,” Jeongin whispers. “I’m sorry I couldn’t do more.”
Your lips part and you pull back, shocked that he could ever think that. His face floods with regret and guilt.
“Neither of you have anything to be sorry for,” Chan steps forward, shaking his head at the two of you. “It’s no one’s fault.”
There’s a certain finality to his tone. Neither you or Jeongin argue.
“I vote on a pack hug,” Han speaks up then, smiling bright and warmly as he steps towards the two of you. He doesn’t let anyone argue, though something tells you no one would, and simply just wraps his arms around both you and Jeongin. Jeongin laughs as he does, shaking his head, but he leans into Han’s touch all the same.
Felix is the next to join in. He practically runs over, coming on the other side so his head meets Han’s in the middle.
Changbin and Hyunjin step forward next, both grinning as they join the hug. Minho is the next to join, positioning himself behind Han. You catch Seungmin moving, as if to step away, but then Chan is grabbing him and pulling him into the hug.
It makes you laugh, a soft giggle bubbling up from your lips. You let your eyes flicker across the group, your pack, the way they surround you now, holding you close and keeping you safe.
It’s everything you’ve wanted and more.
So, with a soft, wistful sigh, you let your head fall into the crook of Jeongin’s neck, and let yourself relish in the feeling of your soulmates around you.
Summary: They've been looking for the final member of their pack for years, a ache that never fades and always exists. Only, when they finally find you, they find a version of you that has been broken. Will they be able to make you whole again?
Pairing: Stray Kids OT8 x F!Reader
Chapter TW. Violence, stabbing, and angst.
Word Count: 4045
A/N: Just a reminder that this fic WILL have a HAPPY ending :)
You were awful at mini golf. Absolutely and wholeheartedly, terrible.
The good thing is, so was Jeongin.
Biting your lip, you desperately try to hold back the laugh that bubbles at the back of your throat. It felt wrong laughing, especially when you weren’t fairing much better, but the sight of Jeongin sending his golf ball straight into the little pond had already been funny enough. However, Jeongin tripping and then falling into the water was almost too much for you to bare.
“Are you alright?” You ask, concerned even though you were very much still laughing at the poor boy. You extend a hand out towards him, to which he takes with an embarrassed flush and a pout. Luckily it was only really his pants that were wet, but as you pull him back onto the main part of the golf course, you can’t help but think he looks a little pitiful.
“I'm alright,” he sighs, running a hand through his hair to brush it back behind his face. “Embarrased? Yes. My ego is also a little bruised. But overall, fine.”
You let out a giggle, hiding it behind your hand. “Don’t be embarrassed.”
Jeongin just looks at you, deadpanned. “You’re laughing.”
Pressing a hand to your face, you continue to attempt to hide your smile. It fails. “I’m not.”
“You are,” Jeongin snorts, any seriousness fading from his face as he shakes his head with a fond chuckle. “It’s okay. You can laugh. I like your laugh.”
That catches your attention, cheeks warming. He'd said the words with such sincerity, his gaze heavy on your own, that you couldn't help but blush. “Don’t embarrass me," you pout.
Jeongin laughs, raising a brow as he steps towards you. “Oh, so I’m the only one allowed to be embarrassed?”
Meeting his eyes, you smile lightly; “exactly.”
Jeongin’s eyes widen, obviously not expecting the cheeky response. But the surprise fades as another laugh leaves his lips, the smile on his face is fond and warm as he shakes his head at you.
You’re not sure what it is about Jeongin. At this point, you feel comfortable around all the boys. You trust them, and they’ve done more than enough to prove to you that trust was justified and they’d never break it. Still, there was something about Jeongin that had always eased you. From the first time you really talked to him, eating Felix’s brownies and laughing at the way he shoved them in his mouth at once, he just made things… easier.
Natural.
The thought occurs to you, distracting you, so you don’t notice Jeongin step closer to you once again. The second he’s right in front of you, you notice, blinking at him with confusion. He’s reaching for you, grabbing your hand in his and pulling you towards him, all with a shit-eating grin on his face.
“Maybe I should give you a taste of my suffering, huh?” He teases, inching closer to… the pond.
Your eyes widen in realization, lips parting as you pull back. You know, though, that if you really wanted, he'd let you go in a second. “No,” you laugh, shaking your head. “No, no! Innie! Don’t!”
He pulls for a moment more before stopping, chuckling as he does. “As if,” he shakes his head. “I wouldn’t want to ruin how pretty you look today.”
You’re positive you’re even more flushed now.
“Stop flirting!”
Jeongin smirks; "I can't help it!”
You roll your eyes. “Regardless of anything, you’ve lost your golf ball.” You gesture towards the pond, where the ball has continued to drift further away after Jeongin’s unsuccessful rescue attempt. “And I don’t think another attempt will be any more successful.”
Jeongin turns to the pond before glancing behind you. “We’re quite a few holes away from the front desk. I’m not sure there’s much of a point in going back to get a new one.”
You hum. “It’s quite a big course too. Long walk back.”
It’s true. When Jeongin had told you you were going mini golfing, you were expecting a cute little course. Like the ones you’d seen in movies. You’d never gone but you remember classmates from school talking about going once. From what you gathered, the courses were usually smaller and done more for fun than actual golf playing.
The one Jeongin had found, however, was massive. It stretched a wide radius, had a lot of trees surrounding it and cute details to really give into the whimsy feeling. Jeongin and you had been in the car for a total of forty minutes to reach your destination and you’re still not even sure how he found the place.
The only other couple that you had seen was enough holes ahead that you couldn’t see them at all anymore.
Which was reassuring to say the least. After your date with Changbin where you’d really thought you’d seen Seojun, being practically alone with Jeongin was reassuring. You were also glad that despite how shaken up you were yesterday, you’d still gone on your date with Jeongin. The boys had done a good job of reassuring you yesterday and trying to cheer you up this morning.
Besides, you know Jeongin had been patiently waiting his turn. You didn’t want to take that away from him.
“We could just team up,” Jeongin smiles at you, the corner of his eyes crinkling at the edges. “Maybe that way we’ll not suck as much.”
You snort; “I don’t think that’s how golf works but sure. It’ll be fun.”
Jeongin nods and moves to retrieve your golf ball, the one you’d already gotten in the hole. It had taken you five hits, but you hadn’t lost yours in the water; so you counted that as a win.
With that, the two of you start to make your way to the next hole.
“Have you ever gone mini golfing before?” Jeongin asks you.
You shake your head; “nope. Hence why I’m so awful.” You laugh lightly. “What about you?”
“I have,” Jeongin nods. “Clearly it did nothing to advance my skills.”
You smile; “from what I’ve gathered from the rest of the pack, you’re particularly clumsy.”
Jeongin ears turn red. “They told you?”
“They did,” you can’t help but giggle. “It seems you have a reputation, Innie.”
Pressing a hand to his face, Jeongin turns to you as you both reach the next hole. “I was hoping to pretend otherwise for at least a while,” he admits. “Though, I guess it would’ve been obvious today regardless of anything.”
“You did literally fall into a pond,” you shrug, grinning at him. Though, as your eyes lower and you take in just how wet the bottom of his pants are, your face twists into an expression of concern. “Are you sure you’re okay, by the way? I’m sure your feet are soaked.”
Jeongin chuckles. “My socks are uncomfortably sticking to my feet.”
You frown; “we could go back if you—”
“No!”
Blinking, you pause, turning to Jeongin.
He hesitates, realizing he’d all but just yelled, gaze falling to his feet as he coughs lightly. “I mean, no, it’s okay,” he repeats, this time calmer. “I… I don’t want our date to end so soon.”
That makes you smile. “I’m sorry you had to wait so long.”
“Don’t be,” he shakes his head, finally moving to hit the golf ball with his putter. “I’m the one who pulled the short straw.”
He manages to make it somewhat close to the hole and turns to you, gesturing for you to step up. Ah, so that’s what he meant — you’d be taking turns. You smile at him as you step forward.
“I still can’t believe that’s how you all decided,” you say, hitting the ball. It goes past the hole. “Your turn.”
Jeongin steps up. “It would’ve been an argument otherwise,” he snorts, shaking his head. “We were all too excited—yes!”
You smile as he gets the ball in the hole, clapping as he grins back at you.
“Good job!” You say, “clearly we do make a better team than going solo.”
He nods, laughing in agreement as he moves to grab the ball and head on to the next hole.
“Did you guys do something similar every time someone joined the pack?” You ask. You’re genuinely curious. It’s been on your mind since they’d brought up the idea of the dates in the first place.
Jeongin nods. “I don’t know about before but they did it with Seungmin and I when we joined. I’m especially thankful they did it with me because it helped me feel more comfortable being in the pack.”
That gives you pause. You do remember Chan saying that there was trouble with the pack when Seungmin and Jeongin joined but you never asked what had happened. You hadn’t wanted to seem like you were prying and you figured they’d tell you when they felt the moment was right..
Jeongin must be able to see the confusion on your face because he moves to explain.
“I came from a really strict pack,” Jeongin explains, finishing lining up the ball before turning to face you. “My parents believed in old traditional values. When I presented as an alpha, just shortly before finding Channie-hyung and them, they were thrilled. But because I presented as an alpha, they wanted me to find an omega, settle down.
“Needless to say, they weren’t thrilled when my soulmate turned out to be soulmates and that some of them were betas and alphas. It was a huge mess. I wanted to be with my pack but I felt torn because of my parents and every ideal they’d ever instilled in me.”
You frown. You had no idea… “Innie, I’m so sorry. That’s awful.”
He shakes his head. “I’m better now.” He assures with a warm, genuine smile. “I’m just thankful they all still took me in. I was… unfair to them at first.”
“Of course they did,” you say, stepping towards him. “They love you. I know for one, the pack wouldn’t be the same without you.”
“Thank you, Y/N. That means a lot.”
You nod, reaching for him. You cup his cheek, touch gentle, and Jeongin leans into the touch. “Thank you for telling me,” you whisper. “I know it must be hard to talk about.”
You would know. It had taken so much courage from you to talk about your past with the pack.
“You confided in us. Trusted us,” Jeongin smiles. “Besides, I knew you would understand. And I’m so thankful that you—”
He’s cut off by a loud thud. It gives the both of you pause, especially because it sounds loud and distinct. Jeongin’s brows furrow and he glances at you, stepping closer, protectively, before glancing around the both of you. There’s trees surrounding you both, a bridge behind you, and the pond that Jeongin fell into a bit further back. But other than that, nothing.
It definitely wasn’t just the wind or anything like that. But then, what…?
“Do you think it was the other couple?” You ask, frowning. “Maybe they—”
You don’t finish your sentence either, though. However, this time it isn’t because of a thud.
It’s because Seojun is standing right in front of you.
Everything in you freezes. A cold, heavy weight settles over you.
He's right there, right in front of you. No more than a few feet away from you. It's the first time you've seen him since you ran away from him that day, since he tried to force a claim bite on you, and that stare is exactly as you remember.
Cold, cruel, smug.
It isn’t just Seojun. Ha-joon and Jung are there too, standing behind him, grinning.
Then, Seojun raises his hand and waves at you. Waves. “Hi Y/N.” Seojun says, smirking.
Your scent sours, your entire body tense. You can’t move. Can’t think. Can’t breathe.
Seojun is standing right in front of you.
Jeongin who, on high-alert nonetheless, looked confused just a moment ago, now has a look of pure rage on his face. Your reaction and the fact that this man knows your name are clues enough to him as to who he exactly is. Jeongin, through process of elimination and assumption, figures the two standing with him are the ones that attacked Seungmin that night.
Instantly, Jeongin is stepping in front of you, one hand pressed against your side. He tucks you behind him, trying to make you feel better. Trying to tell you he’s there and he won’t let anything happen to you.
You barely feel it.
You're shutting down, you can tell even if you can't do anything to stop it. The second you'd laid eyes on Seojun, your omega had retreated into herself; like she used. Left you to protect herself. Your hands have startled to tremble, your heart racing and it feels like you can't breathe.
It feels like his hands are already on you, pinning you to the spot, squeezing around your neck, choking you.
“Oh, so protective,” Seojun laughs, turning to Jeongin with a grin. “How sweet.” His tone says otherwise, bleeding with barely concealed disgust and disdain.
“You’re Seojun, then?” Jeongin asks, voice low and thick with anger.
“Smart too,” Seojun snorts, clearly finding the whole situation funny. “Yes. I’m Seojun. You know my buddies too, right? Or at least, your beta does. After they gave him a bruise or two.”
Jeongin growls. You hear that, snapping out of your revere, mostly because you’ve never heard such a sound come from the young alpha. You finally register him in front of you, arm held out to protect you, chest puffed out and eyes sending daggers at Seojun. There’s pure wrath pouring out of him in waves, making his scent sour and strong.
Heart racing madly against your chest, you stare at the back of Jeongin’s head. He’s standing in front of you just like Seungmin had that night, the night he'd gotten hurt because of you. Shoulders tense, body on alert for any sudden movements.
You know just from that that there’s no way this ends well.
“Last I checked he left a few bruises on them too,” Jeongin snarls. “Looks like one of them is still reeling from it.” He nods his head towards Ha-joon who has a brace around his wrist.
Ha-joon scoffs., rolling his shoulders back.
“Ah, I fear this won’t end the same though. You’re out numbered three to one,” Seojun says and everything about his tone bleeds confidence. It makes you feel sick. You hadn’t forgotten how his voice sounded, given that it still haunted you in your dreams. But it was different hearing it in person.
You barely notice the way your legs have started to shake beneath you.
“Now,” Seojun continues. “We can do this one of two ways. The first, you simply let us take Y/N. As easy as that. We leave, with her, and no one has to get hurt. Second, and this one won’t end well for you, we take Y/N by force.”
“Well,” Seojun laughs, “looks like it’s the second option then.”
It’s instant. Ha-joon and Jung race forward without another word, flanking Jeongin. Jeongin pushes you away from him, harder than he means to but he’s desperate for you to get out of the crossfire. You stumble over your own feet, breath leaving you in panicked heaves, and fall to the ground.
“Run!” Jeongin yells at you, chancing a quick, panicked look back at you. “Get away!”
When you look up, however, all you see is Jung swinging his fist directly into Jeongin’s face.
It’s like that night with Seungmin all over again. Everything you’ve been afraid of is happening right in front of you again. Jeongin’s strong, probably stronger than Seungmin, but the other two are just as strong. You know this. And Seojun hasn’t even stepped in to help yet.
Because every time Jeongin gets a hit on one of them, he gets two in response.
For a moment, you stand there, not running like Jeongin had begged you to; simply just staring. You watch as Jeongin punches Ha-joon across the face, grabbing him by the shoulders and driving him right into his knee. But, the second he steps back, Jung is rushing forward, sending Jeongin stumbling back a few steps with a particularly hard kick.
Somewhere along the way, you start to cry. Full on sobs. Your body is wracked with them, your chest heaving. You’re panicking, not breathing properly, feeling utterly and completely useless as you watch Jeongin, another one of your soulmates, get hurt. Get hurt because of you.
It’s always because of you.
You don’t notice Seojun watching you. Not at first, not until he steps up to you. Not until he’s standing directly in front of you.
You cower at the sight of him, letting out a startled cry. It catches Jeongin’s attention, head swiveling around towards you, distracted, only for him to get knocked straight in the face by a laughing Jung.
Seojun doesn’t even glance back at them. He's completely and wholly focused on you. “You know how to make this stop.”
Breathing hitching, you swallow thickly.
“You know what you have to do.”
With watery eyes you stare up at him, before your gaze drifts back to Jeongin. Ha-joon swings his fist back, hitting Jeongin directly in the stomach. He doubles over, groaning in pain, and then Jung is grabbing him by his hair. You meet Jeongin’s eyes then, his head forced towards you. His mouth is split, he’s bleeding from his nose and yet, he looks terrified—just not for himself..
He looks terrified for you.
He growls, fighting the hands that hold him when he sees Seojun standing right in front of you.
"Get the fuck away from her!" Jeongin roars, soured scent pouring out of him in waves. It's the most upset you've ever smelt him to be, the most enraged you've ever seen him look. Your Jeongin was always smiling, eyes curled at the edges.
He wasn't angry. He wasn't scared. He wasn't bleeding from his lip with bruised knuckles as he tried to fight the two holding him back to get to you.
It breaks your heart.
However, it seems seeing Seojun in front of you gives Jeongin a rush of new energy. He's able to pull himself out of Jung's grip, driving his elbow back in the man's face. Jung stumbles back in response, yelping in pain and Ha-joon looks momentarily stunned, staring at this alpha that's quickly and rapidly losing control.
For the briefest of seconds, there's hope. Hope that maybe this won't end the way you think it will.
And then, there's a fist being slammed right into your stomach. It catches you by surprise. You'd been so focused on Jeongin, you hadn't even noticed Seojun move.
A cry leaves your lips, falling to your knees as you curl into yourself. But before you can recover, Seojun is kicking you right in the side, slamming his foot into your ribs.
"You piece of shit!" Jeongin bellows, "get away—"
You glance up, weakly, when Jeongin's voice gets abruptly cut off. Only, the second your eyes turn to him, he's being stabbed directly in the stomach.
Everything stops.
Jung lets out a sharp, loud laugh. It'll haunt your dreams for the rest of your life. He smirks, beaming and proud, before yanking the knife right back out.
"No!" You cry, voice cracked and broken, your mind turning numb at the sight. Jeongin doubles over on himself, hands moving to press against his stomach where the knife's been left. You see it on his face, immediately. The pain, the terror.
When he pulls back his hands, there's blood. A lot of it. Your heart falls ot the pit of your stomach, wide eyes unable to look away.
He turns to you, then, and for the briefest of seconds, your eyes meet. His lips part, as if to say something, but he's cut off by Jung grabbing him and yanking him back.
You lurch forward. "No, Innie—"
Seojun grabs a fistful of your hair, twisting your head so you're forced to look up at him. The movement strains your neck, neck bent unnaturally, ribs and stomach still aching from where he'd hit you.
He glowers down at you. "I'll kill him," he threatens, voice low and sharp. "I'll make sure he never gets to see that worthless pack of yours ever again."
That's all it takes.
“Please,” you whisper, voice broken, cracked, defeated. You submit instantly. “Please stop. I’ll… I’ll go with you. I-I won’t fight.”
“No!” Jeongin cries, voice cracking as he kicks weakly at Jung, trying to get to you. “No, Y/N! Don’t! Run! I’ve got this! Get back to the car! Find help and—”
“Shut up!” Jung hisses, driving his knee right into Jeongin’s gut, right where he'd been stabbed.
You let out a cry; “please! Stop! Stop!”
Seojun crouches in front of you, meeting you eye-level. “Say it, Y/N.”
You turn to him, sobbing.
“Say it and I’ll make them stop.”
You choke on your breath, and turn to Jeongin one last time. He’s looking back at you, everything stilling for one long moment. The look in his eyes is obvious; don’t. He’s begging you not to. Even as he gets beat within an inch of his life.
If you don’t, you have no doubt they’ll kill him. That they'll finish the job.
“You won’t hurt him anymore?” You ask, turning back to meet Seojun’s eyes.
“I won’t,” Seojun smiles.
Inhaling sharply, you grip the ground beneath you, fingers digging into the dirt.
“I’ll go with you, alpha.” You whisper, ignoring the bile that threatens to rise at the words. “I’ll be your omega.”
You know why Seojun has you say it. Realistically, he could just take you and leave it at that. But it's the principle of it—the need to make you submit.
The need to make you feel less than human, because in his eyes, that's what you are.
Jeongin hisses. “No!”
“That’s a good girl,” Seojun coos, reaching for you. You want to pull away, want to fight him, but you can’t risk Jeongin getting hurt anymore. So, you simply let him grab you, desperately trying to ignore the feeling of his hands back on you.
“My perfect little omega, huh?” Seojun says, pulling you up to your feet. He’s harsh, grip biting around your wrist, and when you stumble onto your feet, legs still shaky, he just yanks you back up. “Let’s get you home.”
You’re cut off by a stinging slap across your cheek. It stuns you, knocks you off your feet, but before you can hit the ground, Seojun is pulling you back up and grabbing you by the chin and yanking your eyes back on him.
Seojun just sighs, keeping his eyes on you. “If you don’t want me to go over there and kill him myself, then you’ll shut up and obey,” he hisses, fingers digging into your skin.
Terrified for Jeongin, you nod.
He continues to pull you, so fast that you barely avoid stumbling over your own feet.
“What about that couple?” Ha-joon calls out to him.
“Leave them,” Seojun calls back. “My dad will deal with the police.”
You glance back, for the last time, tears streaming down your cheeks, as Jeongin continues to call out for you. He’s looking right at you, desperately trying to fight his way to you. His eyes are wild, panicked, and his scent is the most sour you’ve ever smelt it. He’s ignoring his own pain, his own injuries, the only thing on his mind is getting to you.
A sob breaks past your lips.
He never once stops until Jung smacks him on the back of the head with the golf club and knocks him out.
You watch his body hit the ground with a thud. The image will never leave your mind.
Summary: They've been looking for the final member of their pack for years, a ache that never fades and always exists. Only, when they finally find you, they find a version of you that has been broken. Will they be able to make you whole again?
Most of the boys were already asleep. The light in Changbin's room was off, and you knew Hyunjin had slipped in just an hour ago, yawning and saying something about missing his wife. You'd laughed lightly as he had and even though you'd originally thought maybe you'd sleep with Changbin that night, given your date tomorrow, you figured maybe it was best you let those two had some time together.
Felix had dragged a pouting Seungmin and a blushing Jeongin just twenty minutes ago with him to his room. He'd offered you to join but you'd shaken your head, telling him you weren't tired yet.
"Feel free to slip inside when you are, sunny," Felix had said in response. "If you want."
You'd smiled and nodded, wishing the three a good sleep.
Han and Minho had disappeared a while ago.
Besides, you weren't sleepy. Or, rather, you were but these days, it was harder to fall asleep. Being with the others helped, but it still felt like an obstacle to overcome every night and you just weren't ready to tackle it yet.
It was just you in the living room, a book that you weren't really reading perched on your lap. You'd originally grabbed it to help distract you, but it wasn't really doing it's intended job.
Sighing, you close it.
"You're still awake, babygirl?"
Gasping softly at the voice, you turn your head over your shoulder, meeting Chan's waiting eyes. There's a soft smile on his lips, though you see the faint trace of worry in his eyes as he takes you in.
"Is everything alright?"
Sitting up, you nod. "Yeah," you whisper, "just not tired."
That gives him pause. Frowning, Chan makes his way over to you, sitting next to on the couch. There's a brief moment of pause, where your eyes betray you and instinctively glance at his lap. Thankfully, Chan doesn't say anything, instead grabbing you by the hips and pulling you on his lap wordlessly.
Your hands fall on his chest.
"I thought you went to bed with Changbin and Hyunjin," Chan says. "I was almost sure Bin would snag you for the night given he was so excited about your guys' date."
You shake your head. "Hyunjin seemed like he needed him."
Reaching forward, Chan tucks your hair behind your ear. "And what do you need?"
You know it's not just a simple 'what do you need'. It's more.
You sigh. "I don't know what I need," you admit, shoulders falling as you rub at your eyes.
"You look tired for someone who says they aren't, baby," Chan says softly, thumb brushing across your cheek.
"I guess I am," you admit with a small shrug. "I just... It's hard."
"Sleeping?"
"Yeah."
"How so?"
You finally raise your head, glancing at Chan. You're embarrassed, struggling to articulate your meaning, but there's nothing but patience and understanding on Chan's face as he glances back at you. His left hand rests on your hip, rubbing smooth circling patterns into your skin above your shirt and his right hand cups your jaw tenderly.
"Like... something to fight for."
Chan frowns. "Because of the nightmares?"
You blink; "you know?"
"Hyunjin might've said something," Chan nods. "I didn't want to impose. I thought maybe they were getting better or you'd come talk to one of us."
"I... Sometimes, they are," you say. "Better, I mean. Some nights, nothing happens. Or, not nothing. I always have nightmares, but sometimes they're not as bad. But some nights, they're... so vivid. It's like I'm reliving it all over again and I can't escape until I wake myself up out of breath and terrified. It... It depends on the day."
"Do things trigger you to make them worse?"
"Maybe?" You say, because you're really not sure. "It usually happens on the days when my brain is meaner to me."
A sad smile curls on Chan's lips. "Was your brain mean to you today?"
Lips trembling, you glance at your lap, fiddling with your hands. After a moment, you nod, small.
Chan's quiet for a moment. It eats away at you. You think maybe you've overwhelmed him, burdened him with something he couldn't deal with. You hadn't even asked why he was still awake, which was rude because you knew Chan struggled with sleeping himself.
What was wrong with you?
Your lips part to say something, to take it all back, to apologize, but Chan is speaking before you can.
"How about this, baby," he starts, leaning forward, moving his hand from your cheek to wrap around your waist. He's standing before you realize it, a small gasp leaving your lips as your hands tighten on his shoulders.
Chan holds you protectively against his chest.
"We go to my room and lay down in my bed, together," he continues, starting to walk. "We'll lay there together and talk. Just talk. About whatever you want. It can be about what's bothering you, it can be about the movie we watched last night. Anything and no expectations, okay?"
He slips into his room then, softly shutting the door behind him. You continue to stare up at him with wide eyes and parted lips.
"Sleep sometimes feels like an obstacle to me too," Chan whispers, stopping right by his bed to meet your gaze. He continues to hold you, resting his forehead against your own. "We can overcome it together."
Swallowing thickly, you bite your lip. "Even if it takes a while?"
"Even if it takes a while," Chan assures, "I won't leave you behind. I promise."
You search his eyes, finding the sincerity, the promise, and feel your chest swell with the warmth you've come to expect from Chan and the others.
"Okay," you whisper, pulling him closer. "I'd like that."
"Yeah?"
"Yeah," you nod. "As long as I'm not alone."
"You're not alone, Y/N," Chan smiles, soft and loving, slowly lowering you to his bed. He pulls the covers back and tucks you in them, slipping in right after. "You're never alone, baby."
And he's right.
You're not alone. Not anymore.
Changbin was practically bursting with excitement.
He had been since late last night when it was decided that the two of you would go on your date for the next day. After a relaxing day spent together as a pack, everyone full from the delicious breakfast you’d prepared for all of them, Changbin had brought up the idea of taking you out for your date the next day. You’d agreed, saying you were happy to go whenever.
Changbin had been beaming with anticipation since.
He’d been waiting so long. While he counted himself lucky for not pulling the shortest straw, as he could imagine Jeongin was struggling watching everyone else be able to take you out while he had to wait, second to last wasn’t that much better. He was happy for his soulmates regardless, since the love he felt for you was as strong as the love he felt for them.
But he’d be lying if he said he wasn’t a little bit jealous too.
It didn’t matter anymore though, because finally, finally it was his turn.
And his excitement shines clear on his face as he pulls up to the location of your date.
You’re sitting in the passenger seat of the car, humming softly to the music Changbin had turned on. You’d chatted quietly with him during the car ride, but you’d expressed to him you liked listening more than you liked talking so Changbin had helped fill in the silence. Now, though, you’re sitting forward with faint curiosity.
“An arcade?”
Changbin hums in confirmation. “I’ve been wracking my brain on where to take you,” he admits. “I’d originally intended something different but now at the beach house, I had no idea. Felix helped me pick it out. Said it’d be fun. Do you like playing games?”
You shrug; “I don’t have much practice, but I used to like stuff like this when I was a little girl. You win tickets, yeah?"
“Yeah,” Changbin nods, grinning at you. “And you best believe I’m gonna win you the biggest prize there.”
That pulls a soft laugh from your lips, one that makes Changbin’s heart flutter and his grin widen. He loved your laugh. If Changbin had it his way, you’d be laughing all the time. You’re beautiful always, but a smile on your lips always takes his breath away.
Changbin puts the car in park, climbing out of the car before racing to the other side to open the door for you. You stare back at him with mild surprise, but ease when he offers his hand to you. Your hand is soft in his and he decides to not let go even when you’re on your feet and out of the car.
“It might be busy in there,” he warns, squeezing your hand as glances over at you. “If it gets to be too much or anything at all, just let me know, okay?”
You frown; “I don’t want to ruin the date.”
Changbin shakes his head. “You could never,” he assures, voice warm. “Hannie sometimes gets overwhelmed too. I understand.”
You ease at that, nodding, and Changbin guides you into the arcade. He handles speaking to the worker at the front counter, getting your wrist bands that’ll give you two hours of unlimited choice in any games you want. Changbin’s relieved that it’s not crazily busy. There’s a family with two little boys running around and what looks to be a group of teenage girls. Changbin thinks he sees another young couple playing one of the shooting games, but other than that, there’s no one else.
“Ready?” Changbin asks, smiling down at you.
You nod, mirroring his smile; “which one should we start with?”
Changbin suggests a rhythm based, since those are always one of his favourites. You hum in agreement, happy with anything. You ask him to try first, wanting to see how the game works, and Changbin agrees easily. He clicks into the game, letting you choose the song, and is more than pleased when he ends up scoring a nearly perfect score.
“Woah,” you breathe, eyes drifting across the screen that displays his score in bright, bolded numbers. “You’re so good, Bin.”
Changbin can’t help the beam of pride that shoots through him, pleased he’d impressed you.
“Your turn now,” he grins at you, stepping away from the machine and gesturing it towards you. You hesitate a moment, looking at him apprehensively but Changbin just nods encouragingly.
“You’ve got this.”
It’s rocky at first and Changbin has to help guide you through the steps, but you are able to complete the song and the beaming grin you send him is the best prize anyways.
“You did great,” Changbin compliments you, grinning wide. “You’re a natural.”
Your cheeks flush as you brush his compliments off. “What next?”
The two of you go from game to game. It seems you want to try a bit of everything and Changbin is more than willing to oblige your wishes. He’s shocked when you absolutely smoke him in a basketball hoop game, clearing his score by double digits. If it was one of the other boys, Changbin would’ve demanded a rematch, not willing to let his pride take the beating. With you, however, he finds he’d be happy to lose to you time and time again if the way you looked at him afterwards was his punishment every time.
An hour and a half into your date and Changbin’s confident he’s managed to make sure you have a good time. The two of you have wracked up a good amount of tickets and Changbin’s feeling good about his chances to be able to have you bring home any prize of your choosing.
“What should we do next?” Changbin asks, the two of you having just finished a dancing game. There’s a thin shine of sweat across his skin now because of how he’d learned you were very fast with your feet. “Maybe one of those shooting games or—”
Changbin’s words fall silent the minute he feels your hands tightly clutch onto him. He blinks, surprised, glancing down at the knuckle-white grip you have on his sleeve, before turning to look at your face. You’re staring past him, eyes wide and face pale with terror.
Head spinning round, Changbin tries to find what it is that’s suddenly got you so afraid. He thinks maybe, somehow, it’s those two that hurt Seungmin. Or worse, Seojun. And his chest tightens with worry.
But he can’t see anything. All he sees is that family with the two boys, sitting at one of the tables, eating.
A quick glance around the whole place also shows him nothing of concern.
“Princess?” Changbin calls, turning back to you. “What’s wrong?”
You don’t respond. Changbin frowns.
Shifting so he’s in front of you, Changbin lowers his head to meet your gaze head on. “Y/N?”
You blink, as if being pulled from a daze. It takes you a moment, eyes flickering around you before you finally meet his gaze. Almost instantly, you’re curling into yourself. “Sorry,” you breathe, voice quiet. Changbin’s heart breaks at the way it cracks. “I thought…”
But your voice trails, as if afraid of how he’d react if you said more. The thought twists something uncomfortable in his chest.
“You thought?” Changbin prompts, not wanting you to think you can’t express your worries.
You stare past him again, eyes flitting past his shoulder, before going back to his eyes. “I thought I saw Seojun,” you admit, voice quiet.
Changbin frowns. Before he can help himself, his scent sours at the mention of the name. He doesn’t even realize because he’s too lost in his head at the rage coursing through him.
Any mention of Seojun has his blood boiling. The mere thought that someone had done all of that, had hurt you like that—someone you trusted. It was too much for Changbin to bear.
“It’s okay,” you say a moment later, and when Changbin looks at you, you look afraid. Not just in general, but… but at him. At his response, at the anger coursing through him. “I didn’t mean to interrupt our date, I just—”
Guilt floods him. How could he forget himself like that?
How could he scare you like that?
Knowing everything he knew, knowing how hard it was for you to open up and be vulnerable, and still, he’d been too focused on his own feelings to focus on you. What kind of soulmate did that?
“No, no, Y/N, princess,” Changbin calls, words leaving his lips before he can process them. He’s desperate to assure you it isn’t you that he’s upset with. It could never be. “No, princess, I’m sorry. I… I’m not mad at you. You haven’t ruined anything.”
You stare back at him, teary-eyed. “Your scent turned… sour. Angry.” You hesitate, just faintly, fingers still holding onto him but avoiding his gaze. "Seojun's scent used to do that when he was upset with me."
Changbin is truly feeling like the worst alpha alive. But he pushes that aside, because this isn't about him. This is about assuring you he could never be upset with you.
Not like that. Not like Seojun.
"I would never," Changbin starts, breathless as the guilt eats at him. "I would never hurt you like that. You... You know that, right? That none of us would?"
Changbin's shoulders ease when you nod.
"I do," you promise. "I'm sorry. I just got scared."
"I'm sorry," Changbin corrects, shaking his head. "I'm the one who's sorry. You have nothing to apologize for."
You just stare back up at him, with watery, shameful eyes.
“I just… I just wish I could do more, princess,” Changbin admits, sighing. He glances around, realizing the two of you are quite literally standing right in the middle of the arcade. Setting his hand on your lower back, he guides you towards the corner, away from prying eyes. “I hate that Seojun scares you so much and I can’t do more to help you. That’s why my scent soured. Not because of you, never because of you. But I shouldn’t have lost myself like that.”
Your fingers tighten around the sleeve of his shirt. Your gaze has lowered and Changbin fears that his words hadn’t been enough to reassure you. But then, quietly, you say; “you do more than enough already.”
“Y/N?”
“You all do,” you say, this time more confident. “You say you want to do more, but you’ve all done so much. I… I never thought I’d ever be able to be happy like this. I’m sorry if it seems I’m not.”
Swallowing thickly, Changbin raises his hand, brushing hair from your face. “You don’t need to apologize.”
“It’s just…” And you hesitate, voice choking with a barely concealed sob. “I knew Seojun was always looking for me. Of course I knew. And I knew eventually something would happen but… but I thought it’d just be me. Like he’d find me and then that’d be that, you know? I’d go back with him because there’s no way my life could ever be this happy forever. I knew that. But th-then Seungmin got hurt—he got really hurt. And it was my fault.”
Changbin doesn’t know what to say. He can’t believe that’s what you actually believe. That… that you’ve thought this the entire time.
“What if he hadn’t just gotten hurt?” You continue, the tears falling freely down your face now. There’s a choked sob that slips past your lips as you stare at Changbin, looking lost and confused and scared. “What if next time, it’s worse?”
Changbin’s eyes flicker across you, lips left parted and heart breaking at the sight of you so in pain, so scared.
Suddenly, Hyunjin’s words from a few days ago comes to mind.
I’m afraid she might do something drastic because of it.
God. How had none of them realized it was this bad?
“Y/N—”
“I don’t want anything to happen to you!”
You fall into his arms, sobbing. Changbin’s heart falls to the pit of his stomach.
“Princess, listen to me. Look at me. Y/N.”
He pulls back from your embrace, even though all he wants to do is hold you. But he needs you to listen to him. He needs you to look at him as he says this. You reluctantly let him, and Changbin moves to cup your cheeks, meeting your gaze head on.
“Is that what you really think?” He asks, “that you’ll go back to Seojun eventually?”
Slowly, you nod. It isn’t with hesitance or doubt but… reluctance. Changbin swallows thickly.
“That will never happen.”
And your lips part, as if to argue. Changbin doesn’t let you.
“No, listen to me,” he says, voice firm. He’s careful not to sound angry, but he needs you to hear him. “Seojun will never, ever hurt you again. None of us will let that happen.”
You just shake your head. “What if he hurts you?”
“Then he hurts me,” Changbin shrugs, “but he won’t take me down and nothing would ever be painful enough to stop me from making sure he never touched you again. That’d go for any of the boys. Okay?”
You hesitate, voice shuddering, chest rising and falling, before finally, finally, you nod. Changbin knows it hasn’t solved everything, maybe nothing and that those thoughts will probably, unfortunately, continue to linger in your mind. But it’s enough for now. It’s enough until they have a better solution.
“Words, princess.”
“Okay.”
Changbin nods, using his thumbs to brush away the tears from your face. “Okay,” he repeats, breath shuddering. “Come here.” He stands up straight again, pulling you into his arms. You fall into his embrace with ease, pressing your face into the crook of his neck. You press your nose against his scent gland, breathing in as Changbin sends soothing pheromones your way.
“I want your bite, alpha,” you whisper against his skin, sending shivers down his spine. “Please.”
Changbin inhales sharply. “Okay, princess, let’s just get to the car, okay?”
You nod against him and so Changbin shifts, grabbing your legs to lift you into his arms. You do so with ease, clinging onto him. Changbin turns, heading towards the exit. The worker standing at the counter sends him a funny look and Changbin hesitates.
The prizes. He said he’d win you the biggest prize.
Inhaling sharply, Changbin lets his eyes drift across the wall of prizes. His gaze is quick, fleeting, but he knows when he sees it, he’ll know.
And that’s exactly what happens. Catching sight of the big pink pig plushie, Changbin slams all of your won tickets onto the table.
“We’ll take that one.” Changbin says, shifting you in his grasp to point at the plus.
The worker looks like he wants to argue, the word ticket forming on his mouth, but then he catches the look on Changbin’s face and the beta’s face splits with momentary fear. He moves to grab the plush without a single word. He hands it to Changbin with a nervous smile, to which Changbin just nods, grabbing it and walking out the door with you and the plush in his arms.
He sets you in the passengers seat gently, smiling as you blink up at him, still teary-eyed. He hands you the pink pig.
“I told you I’d win you the biggest prize, didn’t I?” He smiles. “For you.”
You take the plush, lips parting, before the smallest of smiles curls onto your lips. Your eyes drift across the plushie, feeling the soft fluffy material between your finger tips before turning back to Changbin. “I love it, Bin,” you whisper. “Will you scent it for me?”
Changbin nods. “Of course. Here.”
He gently shuts the door, moving around to the driver's side and gets in. He takes the plush already stretched towards him, smiling at you as he scents it with ease. He makes sure to pump out calming pheromones as he does.
When the plush is properly scented, you take it from him and pull it close.
“You still want my mark, princess?” Changbin asks, “it’s okay if you’ve changed your mind. We don’t have to.”
You glance up at him. “I do,” you mumble, head pressed into the plush. “I want all of your bites.”
Changbin smiles. “You almost do,” he says, letting his eyes trail across the six bites already on your neck; three on each side. “Just mine and Innie’s left, yeah?”
You nod, glancing down at the plushie again; “yeah.”
“It’s not too much?”
You shake your head. “Helps me feel closer to you all,” you whisper. “Makes me feel safe.”
Changbin smiles sadly, swallowing thickly.
“Come here, then, princess,” he whispers. “Let me make you feel safe.”
Summary: They've been looking for the final member of their pack for years, a ache that never fades and always exists. Only, when they finally find you, they find a version of you that has been broken. Will they be able to make you whole again?
Pairing: Stray Kids OT8 x F!Reader
A/N: Okay, all Hyunjin lovers!!! It's your time to shineeee!
Chapter TW. Angst, self-deprecating thoughts and fluff too!
You watch with a soft smile as the waves roll in and coat your feet. It’d been cold at first but now every time it comes crashing in, it just feels nice.
Refreshing.
It feels the way you'd always expected to, the way you'd imagined it to when your mother would tell you stories of her experiences. When you were younger, you used to dream about the day that the two of you would finally be able to see the ocean together.
Only, when you finally made it to one, she wasn't here.
“Sunny, don’t you want to come in?”
Glancing up, you meet Felix’s gaze. He’s standing a few feet from you, only in his trunks. His hair is wet because the second the three of you had made your way out here, he’d all but dived straight into the water. He’d done so with a laugh and a bright grin, looking like there’s nowhere else he’d rather be.
You glance past him at Jeongin. The boy is also in a pair of swimming trunks, wet hair combed back from his face. His chest is rising and falling from the exertion of swimming, but there’s a warm, dazzling smile on his face.
Truthfully, you were still adjusting to seeing them shirtless. It wasn’t like you were oblivious to how attractive your soulmates were. Each of them were strikingly beautiful in their own ways. But this was the least clothed you’d seen any of them. You still remember the fumbling, flushed mess you’d been when you first walked into Felix’s room.
You know Chan had said they’d been waiting to go when you returned, but you didn’t really think they’d be dressed and ready to go. Felix at the time had had a shirt on, but Jeongin had turned to greet you, shirtless and grinning and you had nearly passed out at the sight from how flushed you'd gotten.
Before either of them could say a word, you were running to the extra room, stuttering something about getting changed into your bathing suit. You hadn’t even planned on wearing it, just thinking you’d go out and watch the boys like you had yesterday with Seungmin. But it was the first excuse your mind could come up with, and so you’d been forced to put on the swimming suit Changbin had helped you pack. You’d been careful to throw a dress on over top, still not completely comfortable showing that much skin.
When you’d returned, telling yourself you wouldn’t act like an idiot at the sight of a chest, Felix had also been shirtless.
Needless to say, you were most definitely still an idiot. A flushing, stuttering idiot.
And now, twenty minutes later, you still weren’t used to the sight. Or the warmth that spreads through your body at the sight. But at least you could hold a proper conversation.
“I don’t know,” you finally say, turning back to Felix with a shrug. “I’m content just standing here.”
Felix pouts, turning back to Jeongin.
“I thought you said you used to like to swim, baby?” Jeongin asks, trekking through the water until he’s standing in front of you. With him this close, you can see the trails of water drops drip down his chest. You try not to get lost in the sight. “Don’t you want to swim?”
Blinking, you meet his eyes. “I…” But you let your voice trail.
“Are you okay?” Felix asks, concern clearly in his tone.
You nod. After your conversation with Minho in the car, you were actually feeling a lot better. At least, better than you have in days. There was a certain calm washing over you, and you were grateful for it. Minho’s reassuring and soft words were enough to calm your racing mind, and remind you how loved you were.
But…
“I’m okay,” you assure, smiling at the two. “I just…” You grip at your dress, squeezing the material between your feelings.
“Oh,” Felix says, and Jeongin turns to him, confused. “Are you uncomfortable in just your swimsuit, sunny?”
You both hate and love that Felix can seemingly just understand what’s going through your mind, even without you having to say anything. You love it because you don’t have to say the words, but you hate it because it makes you wonder just how easily your feelings really are to read on your face.
“Is it us?” Jeongin asks, frowning.
“No,” you say, shaking your head. “Not really. I just… I was always forced to be naked with Seojun. If I was allowed clothes, it was… revealing. He liked being able to have me on display like that.” You admit, swallowing thickly as your gaze lowers to your feet again, allowing the waves to sooth your racing heart.
“I know you guys would never objectify me like that,” you say. And you mean it. You really do trust that all eight of these boys would never look at you in that way; like you were some object. Some pet for them. Didn’t make it any easier though. “I’m just not used to it.”
There’s a breath of silence, then;
“If it makes you really uncomfortable, sunny. You don’t have to,” Felix assures. “But I also think it’d be good for us to address this feeling.”
And you sigh. You sigh because despite everything, you know that Felix is right. The only way you were going to get better was if you put the effort into doing so. Everyone was always so patient with you — and hadn’t that been what you’d been worried about? That you were causing issues, that you were a problem. This was a chance for you to prove you weren’t a problem, weren’t a nuisance.
That you could be normal.
The only way to heal was by forcing yourself to overcome those uncomfortable thoughts.
“Okay,” you breathe, voice soft. Because really, as you stare out into the ocean, you think it would be nice to go into it. To swim in it. You’d always dreamed of doing so when you were a little girl. And this was a way for you to reconnect with that younger version of yourself.
The one that was happy and not damaged. The one that would spend hours swimming in her mother’s friend's pool.
The one that didn’t let anything stop her.
And this was your chance to help your mothers dream come true, even if she wasn't here physically with you to see it.
“Want us to turn around?”
It’s Jeongin who asks. His voice is soft and gentle with understanding. You nod.
And so they both do. Turn their backs to you, and don’t say a word about how weird it is that you need them to turn around just so you can undress down to your swimsuit.
Inhaling sharply, you nod to yourself, grabbing the hem of your dress and pull it over your head. You do it in one quick swoop, knowing you’ll lose the nerve to do so otherwise. And the second the dress is off and you’re left in your one piece, the pretty lilac one you’d picked out with Changbin, your chest tightens with worry. You feel vulnerable, naked even though you aren’t.
“I’m done,” you whisper.
You watch both boys turn, almost tentatively. You meet Felix’s eyes first, then Jeongin, and watch as both boys' faces split into wide smiles.
“You look beautiful, sunny,” Felix beams, making his way over to you.
“Absolutely gorgeous,” Jeongin nods, reaching for your hand. You let him take it, watching him with wide eyes. “And now you’re ready to swim.” He says it with a wide grin, innocent and childlike almost.
They both continue to smile at you, and really, that’s all they say about your appearance. And it’s like something just changes, like a snap of the fingers, but all of a sudden you don’t feel so hyperaware of yourself. It doesn’t feel like you can feel eyes on you, looking at you, all you feel is the warmth of their gazes and smiles as they lead you into the water.
It’s exactly what you needed.
Jeongin is gentle, slow and patient with you. He keeps his eyes on you, not your body, and leads you into the water. Felix is further ahead, padding in the water, watching the two of you.
The water goes higher and higher on your body, until you're chest deep.
Jeongin grins at you; "does it feel nice?"
"It does," you nod.
Felix is saying something about being back at home in Australia, spending his childhood in the water. You try to listen at first, you want to, but then the water shifts around you and your eyes are dancing across the far expanse of water in front of you. At the way the sun hits it, the reflections bouncing off of it, of the way it feels against your skin.
"Y/N," Jeongin calls a moment later. You turn to him, noticing the spike of panic in his scent, confused. "Why are you crying?"
Oh.
You hadn't even realized. Raising your hand, you press your fingers against the skin of your cheek. Your hand is already wet from the water, but sure enough you are crying.
Felix comes close, lips curved down in a frown. "Is it too much?" He asks, "did we push you? Sunny, I'm sorry. Maybe we should—"
"No," you cut in, voice soft. "No, it's okay. It's not your fault."
Jeongin presses his hand to your cheek. "But... you're crying."
"It's a good cry," you say, letting the edges of your lips curl into a small smile.
Felix and Jeongin look positively bewildered.
"My mom always wanted to take me to swim in the ocean," you explain and you know that they're shocked by you bringing up your mother by the way their eyes widen. Truthfully, you don't talk about your mother often. At least, nothing in depth.
It was a sensitive topic for you. Something that brought a lot of pain.
And it wasn't that you didn't trust the boys, just that it hurt too much to talk about.
But it feels fitting to talk about it now.
"We used to talk about it," you say. "All the time."
"Sunny," Felix calls, voice soft. "Are you okay?"
You nod with a watery smile. "I think she'd be happy I'm here, even though she can't be here with me too. Because I'm here with my pack that takes such good care of me."
Jeongin's eyes widen and Felix's lips part, both of them looking equally shocked but incredibly touched at the same time.
Jeongin steps forward first; "we're happy you're here with us too, Y/N."
"Yeah," Felix nods, smile beaming and loving. "And I'm sure your mother is watching down on you now with a smile on your face."
Swallowing thickly, your breath hitches. "You think so?"
"I know."
And somehow, you do too.
Two hours later, your hair is still wet even as Seungmin dries it with a towel. You’re sitting at the kitchen table, nibbling on a snack Minho had all but forced into your hands. Jeongin and Felix were also sitting there, but the two were more focused on trying to convince Seungmin to dry their hair after he was done with you.
Felix's snack lays unattended next to him, Jeongin’s snack had been shoved in his mouth in one bite the second Minho had handed it to him.
Seungmin is just finishing drying your hair, swatting at Felix who reaches for him, when Hyunjin comes into the kitchen.
He turns to you instantly, grinning ear to ear.
“You ready?”
You blink back at him, a little puzzled.
“Ready for what?”
“Our date!”
You can barely get a word in before Hyunjin is reaching for you, promptly ignoring Seungmin who calls after you. Hyunjin’s grip is purposefully lax, a silent way of telling you that if you wanted to leave, you could. You don’t, though. You weren’t expecting to have your date with Hyunjin the same day as your date with Minho, but you didn’t mind.
You liked the dates. You liked them even more when they went better with no incidents.
So, you let Hyunjin lead you. He doesn’t take you to the front door like you half expect, instead, he maneuvers his way through the still far too big rental house. He passes by the bedrooms and the living room, before settling on the den. You haven’t been here yet, and it’s absolutely beautiful.
The walls are lined with glass windows, from floor to ceiling, and gives a nice view of the side of the beach. The mid-afternoon sun shines in with a warm glow. There’s couches and chairs lining the space, with pillows and throw blankets, and overall just a cozy atmosphere. Right in the middle of the den, however, is a table set up with two medium sized canvases, paint brushes and a wide colour assortment of paints.
You finally turn back to Hyunjin, lips left parted, and see the wide grin he’s sending back to you.
“I'm an awful painter,” are the first words that come out of your mouth.
Hyunjin blinks, obviously not expecting you to say that, before a bubble of laughter bursts past his lips. He shifts the grasp he has on your wrist to thread his fingers through your own, and squeezes. “It’s not about being good,” he assures you, and normally you’d find that hard to believe given that you know the man literally teaches classes about painting. But the look on his face is so genuinely sincere, you really do believe him.
“I just want you to let loose and have fun.”
And really, you can’t argue with that sentiment. The past few days have been heavy on your mind and if you could escape the racing thoughts of your mind for just a few hours; well, then… who were you to complain?
Hyunjin spends the first fifteen minutes explaining how to prep the canvas, and then what the different brushes are all for and then how to apply the paint to the canvas. It’s an overload of information that you definitely will not remember completely but you pay close attention and try to capture as much information as possible.
“What are you going to paint?” You ask Hyunjin as you stare at your blank canvas.
He’s positioned the two of you so you can’t see his and he can’t see yours. By the smile on his face, you figure this is deliberate.
“It’s a surprise,” he smiles at you, sending you a wink that has your cheeks warming. “What about you?”
You want to be witty and reply the same. You think that a previous you, a more confident you that existed before Seojun, would’ve. But all that comes out is a pitiful; “maybe the beach?”
Hyunjin’s eyes crinkle at the corners. “That’s great!” He encourages warmly, nodding. “Just focus on what you can see and let your hand do the rest.”
It seems a lot easier said than done, but you try to take Hyunjin’s advice to heart. You let your eyes wander towards the windows, on the expanse of beach you can see. You focus on the colours you can name and see, before taking the brush Hyunjin had said was good for beginners to start with. You let your eyes wander across the many colours of paint for a moment before settling on a beige colour that reminds you of the sand perfectly.
Then, you just let your hand start moving.
It’s hard at first. You know you’re thinking too much about it and that is making your movements jerky and wrong. Hyunjin seems to notice as well, pausing in the middle of his own painting. He watches you for a moment, before standing. You watch him, confused, but then music starts softly playing and your eyes widen in surprise.
“I always find it easier with music,” Hyunjin smiles at you, moving to sit back down. “Helps me get out of my thoughts a little.”
You brighten at that, nodding because really, the music he’s put on is nice and calming and when you turn back to your painting, your hand does move just a little bit easier.
It’s smooth-sailing after that. You wouldn’t say your painting is perfect. You can clearly tell it’s done by someone who has not a single clue what it is they’re doing, but at the same time, you’re proud of how it turns out.
“Let’s see! Let’s see!”
You let out a warm laugh at Hyunjin’s calls, practically bouncing in his seat as he tries to catch a peek of it. You have the brief thought that maybe Hyunjin will be disappointed when he sees how horrendous yours is, especially because you know his will be a masterpiece without you having to even see it.
But then, you remind yourself, Hyunjin wouldn’t do that. None of the boys would.
With a shy smile, you slowly turn the canvas around. Hyunjin’s reaction is immediate.
“It’s beautiful!” He all but screeches, blinking in surprise as he leans closer, as if to get a better look at it. “Wah… you did such an amazing job with the waves. And the sand! That’s the perfect colour! I love the little birds you added in too.” Glancing up, he meets your eyes; “you’re a natural.”
You’re sure your whole face is warm, from the tips of your ears all the way to your neck. Still, Hyunjin’s words send a warm flush through your body. He isn’t just saying it for the sake of saying it, he seems to truly mean every word that leaves his lips.
“Thank you, Jinnie,” you whisper, finding yourself shy as you bite your lip to stop the wide smile that begs to spread across your lips.
“Can I keep it?” Hyunjin asks, further surprising you. You glance back up, expecting him to be joking, but the question is earnest just as much as the hopeful look in his eyes is.
“If… If you want,” you nod. “But don’t feel you have—”
“Perfect!” Hyunjin cuts in swiftly, not even letting you begin to doubt yourself as he grabs the canvas. “I’ll hang it on the wall in my room when we get back.”
Is the room getting really warm or is it just you?
“You don’t have to go that—”
“This is your first painting of the many painting dates we’re going to have, bambi,” Hyunjin reminds, almost holding the canvas as if it was a precious artifact. “Of course I’m gonna hang it on my wall.”
And truthfully, you don’t have an argument against that.
“O-Okay.”
Hyunjin smiles at that, pleased by your response.
“Can I see yours?” You ask, gesturing loosely in the direction of his canvas. “You said it was a surprise.”
“Oh,” Hyunjin blinks, as if remembering he’d also painted something. “Of course. Here.”
He takes his canvas off the stand, handing it towards you.
The second you catch sight of what, or rather who he’s painted, your breath leaves you.
It's you. You were expecting something expertly painted, something beautiful, which the painting definitely is, but you were expecting him to paint the beach as well. Or something like that. You figured that’s why he’d set the date up in the den, because it had such a perfect view of said beach. But no. There’s no waves or sand or birds, it’s a portrait of you.
Lips parting, cheeks still warm, you let your eyes trail across the painting. No one has ever painted you before, even more so, not so beautifully. You’ve never seen yourself this way. You didn’t even know you could look like this. But it is you. Despite everything, the face staring back at you is your own.
“Do you like it?”
For the first time, Hyunjin seems a little nervous. His voice comes out quiet, tentative, and when you glance up at him, he’s looking at you like your opinion will make or break him.
And how could you ever say anything other than; “I love it.”
The words come out breathless, heavy, meaningful.
“Is…” And you hesitate, the air suddenly thick between the two of you. Not thick in an uncomfortable way, in a tense way, but thick in the way that there’s so much you want to say but don’t know how to. “Is that how you really see me?”
“It is,” Hyunjin affirms, not hesitating. “You’re beautiful.”
You think you could cry. You might already be crying.
Hyunjin’s thumb pressing against your cheek confirms that you are. He swiftly wipes the tears away, touching gently and softly. You didn’t even know he’d gotten that close.
“Hyunjin,” you whisper, meeting his gaze through your own watery vision. “Thank you. I… I love it.”
He smiles, fondly. “It’s for you.”
Your eyes widen; “I can keep it?”
“Of course,” he nods, and his hand falls to your wrist squeezing. “I want you to.”
And you stare at him for a moment, staring into his beautiful eyes, the ones that are staring back at you with such love. Then, naturally, your eyes drift downwards. To his lips.
Hyunjin’s breath shutters; “can I kiss you?”
Your answer is immediate; “please.”
He leans forward, not hesitating a second. His lips are warm and soft against your own. He leans in closer, shifting until his leg is pressing against your own. His one hand hovers to your hips as the other moves to hold your hand.
When he pulls away, you chase him.
“Y/N?”
Eyes lidded, breath heavy, you whisper; “I want your mark.”
You’ve gotten one from every date you’ve been on, sans Chan’s who’d done it before. You’re not about to stop with Hyunjin.
“Yeah?” Hyunjin echoes, sounding desperate.
You hum; “yeah.”
So he does. And like others, it starts with pain and ends with the feeling of being loved. Hyunjin bites you right next to Felix’s. You shutter at the thought.
“Give me your bite back,” he whispers against your neck, breath tickling your skin. “You’re the only one I’m missing.”
You do. At this point, the movement and action is easier to you than it had been with Chan or Felix. You have practice now, you know what to do.
The soft moan that leaves Hyunjin’s lips takes you by surprise though.
You pull back, catching his eyes. Hyunjin’s cheeks burn.
“Sorry,” he whispers.
You shake your head; “don’t be.” You smile, warm and genuine.
His lips part to say something else, the two of you still inches apart, but then the door bursts open.
“Dinner time!”
You lean back, surprised, only to find Changbin on the other side. He looks momentarily shocked as well, eyes flickering from you to Hyunjin, before he smirks.
“Sorry to interrupt,” he laughs, and your face burns more. “But like I said, it’s dinner. Minho’s been waiting ten minutes for you both.”
You hide your face in your hands, mortified as Hyunjin huffs;
“You could’ve knocked.”
Changbin shrugs.
“Don’t make him wait any longer,” Changbin snorts, moving to step back. “Or else Minho’ll be pissed. Probably not at you, though, princess.”
He walks off in the next second, his laughter carrying through. You turn back to Hyunjin, still embarrassed.
“Well,” Hyunjin coughs, rubbing the back of his neck. “I guess we better get going.”
Summary: They've been looking for the final member of their pack for years, a ache that never fades and always exists. Only, when they finally find you, they find a version of you that has been broken. Will they be able to make you whole again?
Pairing: Stray Kids OT8 x F!Reader
A/N: MINHO TIMEEEE
Chapter TW. Angst, self-deprecating thoughts and fluff too!
Minho smiles at you, finding the way you ask the question utterly adorable. You’re staring back at him with a certain gaze of wonder, hand tightly clutching Minho’s own.
“Yes,” Minho hums softly, squeezing your hand. “When I found out there was one by the beach, I knew it was where I had to take you.”
You turn to him, and Minho lets out a pleased hum when he sees you smile.
Truthfully, it had been a bit of a rough start to his date with you. You’d agreed to sleep with Han and him in their room the night before, and Minho had watched with a fond smile as you and Han had fallen asleep wrapped up in each other's arms. And although it was a bit of a hassle to get you up when Han refused to let you go, meaning Minho had to bring Han to Chan and Jeongin’s room. He’d given the omega to the two alphas, letting them coddle the man as he made his way back to you.
That wasn’t the problem. He’d expected that.
What had been the problem was how nervous you’d been to leave the beach house with him to go on your date.
You were absolutely convinced something bad would happen, like it had with Seungmin. At the same time, however, you’d seemed desperate not to disappoint Minho.
None of them had really taken that into consideration, how you'd be afraid to leave the house again after what had happened. It was an understanding PTSD response, and somehow, it had slipped Minho's mind completely that it was even a possibility.
He was still ashamed of himself.
“Kitten, we can just have the date here if it’d make you feel better,” he’d offered when he’d seen the clear anxiety written across your face.
And for a moment, he’d thought you might agree. But then you’d shaken your head, pouting. “Want to go on the date,” you’d mumbled, “I promise.”
It had taken a total of twenty minutes before Minho was positive you actually did want to go on the date and hadn’t just been saying it not to hurt his feelings. It had taken twenty more minutes of him reassuring you that absolutely nothing would happen, certainly nothing like what had happened on your date with Seungmin, before you’d felt comfortable enough to walk out the door and get in the car.
Minho is just happy he’d woken you up early enough that the delays hadn’t caused you to be late to your booking.
Now that they were standing in front of the cat cafe, you still seemed nervous. You hadn’t let go of his hand once, and occasionally you’d glance behind you, as if expecting Seojun to walk around the corner. But, you also looked genuinely excited about the cat cafe.
“Let’s go inside, hmm?” Minho prompts gently, squeezing your hand. “The kitties are waiting for us.”
You let him pull you into the cafe, a little less resistance in your walk and for that Minho is grateful. You tense when the lady working at the cat cafe comes up to you two, hiding behind his back. The lady sends you a questioning look, but before she can bring any more attention to it, Minho is swiftly telling her his name and that they have a booking.
It’s smooth sailing after that. Minho had done an early booking to try and avoid as many people being there as possible and thankfully, it seemed the cafe was empty except for an older lady sitting at the far corner with a cup of tea. Minho notices the way she sends him and you a soft smile, and he returns it before refocusing on the lady who is explaining the rules of interacting with the cats.
And then, finally, it’s just the two of you inside.
You’re still standing behind him, as if unsure if you’re allowed to approach any of the cats lazing about the small playroom.
“It’s okay,” Minho smiles at you, gently coaxing you out from behind his back. He keeps his hand in yours and uses the other to rest on your lower back, nodding at you when you turn to him curiously. “Let them approach you.”
He sits you both down on a little bench. You seem content for now just watching the cats, and Minho watches as a smile curls on your lips when you see two younger cats playing chase with each other across the room.
“They’re so cute,” you whisper, as if afraid your voice will spook them.
Minho hums in agreement. “One day, I’ll introduce you to my three cats.”
You turn to him; “they live at home with your parents, right?” You ask.
“Yes,” he smiles. “Soonie, Doongie and Dori.” He lists their names off for you, unable to help the fond smile on his lips. It has been a while since he’s visited home, now that he thinks about it. And he desperately misses his babies. “I’m still bummed they can’t live at home with us, but of course, I’d never want to put Seungmin, Changbin or Hyunjin in any danger.”
You smile at him. “That’s very sweet of you.”
Minho turns to you in surprise, his heart fluttering in warmth at your words.
“Thank you, kitten,” he says, squeezing your hand.
You turn back to the cats, watching, but Minho notices movement out of the corner of his eyes. Turning his head, he smiles softly when he sees what looks like an older cat, grey and long haired, making their way over to you two. Minho gently squeezes your hand, pointing at the cat. You tense immediately, afraid of scaring it, but the cat seems unphased, strolling over to the two of you without a care in the world.
The cat rubs up against your leg, brushing his cheek against your pants. You watch, lips parted, and then the cat meows.
You turn to Minho, shocked.
“Pet it,” Minho encourages softly. “It’s okay.”
So you do. Tentatively, you reach out, letting your fingers softly brush against the top of the cat's head. The cat leans into the touch, pushing its head against your hand, and that seems to be enough to give you the courage to pet it more confidently. Scratching your fingers through its fur, the cat starts to purr, meowing happily up at you.
“Seems they like you,” Minho coos, unable to deny how absolutely adorable the sight is.
With that cat comes others. You’re a natural. Minho is happy enough to lean back and let you have the glory, watching as a multitude of cats brush up against you, purring. You play with them and pet them, and soon that tension fades from your shoulders.
Minho notices instantly.
By the end of your hour appointment, you're in cat bliss.
Minho asks if you want to stay and get something to eat, but you just shake your head, mumbling that you want to go home. Minho doesn't mind. Although it seems like the date has helped calm some of your anxiety, he also understands that you still feel safest at home. Surrounded by the others.
He thanks the lady, and sends a smile to the older lady that still sits in that far corner table, before leading you back out and into the car.
Instinctively, Minho moves to start the car, but your hand falling on his own stops him.
“Kitten?”
Your gaze is downturned, focused on your lap where your other hand nervously plays with the hem of your shirt. Minho frowns, concerned.
"What's the matter, baby?”
It takes you a moment, one long agonizing moment for Minho where his chest tightens with worry. But he focuses on giving you the time you clearly need to collect your thoughts. And when your lips part, he leans closer, shifting so your hand is back in his instead of holding onto his wrist.
“Do you think I deserve to be in the pack?”
Minho feels his heart break instantly.
Your words come out whispered, but he hears the hitch in your breath as your eyes well with tears. Suddenly, Minho wishes Felix or Han were here; not because he doesn’t want to deal with you, but because they’d know how to comfort you. Minho isn’t good with emotions, doesn’t know how to comfort. The two omegas always seemed to know what to say and do, which always amazed Minho because he never does.
Knowing how to comfort someone seemed to come naturally to them. Even the others seemed to know what to say. Han always told him he was better at than he thoughthe was, but Minho had a hard time believing him.
But he’s the only one here and he’ll be damned if he sits here like a fool while you’re crying.
“Of course you deserve to be in the pack,” Minho says, because that’s the first thing he needs to address. It seems natural that the best way to make you feel better would simply be to negate those worries that have obviusly been plaguing your mind. “Why would you think you don’t?”
Sniffling, you turn to him, teary-eyed. “I cause problems,” you say, voice cracking. “That’s what Seojun always said. I didn’t want to believe him, but he was right. I don’t know how to be a proper omega, not like Felix and Han… I didn’t know how to nest and I get overwhelmed easily. And…”
You hesitate, voice hitching, chest rising as you try to catch your breath. “And Seojun won’t stop until he finds him… Seung-Seungmin already got h-hurt because of me! I don’t know what I’ll do if anyone else gets hurt or-or worse…”
Minho is desperately out of his league. And he feels so incredibly guilty that you’ve been living with these thoughts and none of them knew. He, like the rest, knew you weren’t okay but he hadn’t known it was this bad. That these were the thoughts circulating in your head all the time.
Or maybe, he had. Hyunjin had said just last night it was this bad and it seems his fears were closer to reality than Minho wanted them to be. He hadn't understood why Hyunjin would think you'd go to such lengths like going back to Seojun, but sitting here now, watching you blame yourself and say such awful things...
God, what a terrible alpha he is. Not even able to recognize when one of his omegas were in such deep pain.
“Kitten,” Minho calls, trying to get your eyes on him. He needs you to focus on him, calm down for a moment so you can properly hear what he’s saying. “Y/N, look at me.”
You do. Through blurred and watery eyes, you meet his gaze. Minho can’t help but think even when crying, you’re beautiful.
“Can I touch you?”
Shakily, you nod your head; “please.”
He reaches for you, settling his hands on your waist. He pulls you towards him, and it’s a little awkward and strange, but he needs you close, needs you on him, with him. His alpha is begging to have you close, and so that’s what he needs too.
He settles you on his lap. You let him, pliant and willing, and because of the small space of the car, you’re flush against him.
Minho cups your cheeks, pulling your eyes on him.
“I want you to listen to what I’m saying, okay, kitten?”
You nod.
“Words, Y/N,” he says. “I need to hear you say you’ll listen to me.”
“I-I’m listening,” you breathe.
Minho inhales sharply. “You’re our fated mate. You’re part of the pack,” he says, pouring love and affection into his voice. “You’re ours just as much as we’re yours. No matter what, that’s all that matters. I nor the pack cares that we could be in danger because of Seojun. All that matters to us is making sure you’re happy and safe—with us.”
“But—”
“No buts,” Minho cuts in, using his thumb to brush away the tears from your cheeks as he shakes his head. “I know seeing Seungmin hurt was scary. I didn’t like seeing him that way either. And we’ll do everything to make sure nothing like that ever happens again. However, it wasn’t your fault. It wasn’t Seungmin’s either. None of us blame you.”
Leaning into his touch, you breathe in sharply. Then, slowly you nod.
“And you’re a perfect omega,” Minho continues. “Doesn’t matter how you act, what instincts you lean on, just as long as you’re happy. And those things come with time. Kitten, you were forced to ignore and hide those instincts for years. Of course, you’re different from Han and Felix.”
That pulls a frown on your lips, and Minho is quick to rectify that.
“But that’s what makes you you,” he whispers, pressing his forehead against your own. “And you’re perfect the way you are.”
There’s a hitch in your breath at that. Minho meets your eyes and smiles.
“We love you, kitten. I love you.”
And it’s silent for a moment. Minho’s words carry in the silence of the car, and then you’re shifting. Minho lets you, pulling away and finds himself pleasantly surprised when you let your head fall into the crook of his neck, your nose pushing against his scent gland.
“Kitten?”
“I love you all too,” you breathe, voice still hoarse and cracked from your crying. “I love you all so much."
Minho smiles.
Wrapping his arms around you, Minho places one hand on the back of your head, soothing you.
"I don't ever want to be apart from any of you. I don't want to leave the pack."
Slowly, his shoulders ease. That had to mean something positive, right? Surely, if you felt that way, you wouldn't go back to Seojun. They'd just have to be more careful, be more attentive in making sure you never doubted their love or your position in the pack.
Minho would make sure he reminded you every day.
"Then, you won't," Minho whispers, running his fingers through your hair. "We don't want you to leave either."
You whine, something soft, something desperate. You press your nose harder against Minho's neck, and he feels the edges of your teeth graze against his skin.
“Want your bite,” you mumble against the skin of his neck. “Want your bite like the others.”
Minho hesitates. “You sure, jagi? We don’t have to.”
You nod against him, and your scent sweetens at the pet name; “I want all your bites,” you whisper, and Minho smiles.
“Okay then, jagi,” Minho says, making sure to use that pet name specifically. “Then that’s what you’ll get.”
Chan’s sitting on the couch when you and Minho return from your date.
Almost instantly, he notices something's wrong.
He sits up, concerned, but then catches Minho’s gaze. The alpha is looking at him in a way as if to say ‘later’. And then Chan properly sees you, sees the happy, content smile on your face. It’s the first true look of calm and contentment he’s seen on you in days.
“Hi baby,” he smiles, standing up as you turn to him. “How was your date?”
You smile. It’s still soft, doesn’t completely reach your eyes, but it’s warm and loving all the same. “Good, Channie,” you say.
Minho pulls your jacket off of you, brushing back hair from your face. He meets Chan’s gaze again.
Chan catches his meaning.
“Hey baby,” Chan calls, turning to you again. “Lixie and Innie were thinking of going swimming soon, but they wanted to wait for you. You think you’re up for swimming?”
You pause in thought at that, looking back at Minho who just nods at you encouragingly.
“Go ahead, jagi,” he smiles, “I’ll come find you later.
You ease at that. “Sure,” you say, nodding at Chan.
“Go find Lixie in his room,” Chan says, pointing towards the hall. “He’ll be happy to see you.”
“M’kay.”
Chan watches as you walk off, turning back to the two alphas with a smile before you disappear down the hall.
They wait a moment.
“What happened?” Chan says the second he’s sure you’re far away enough. “Did…” But he struggles to ask, fearing the worst.
“We didn’t run into anybody,” Minho assures, setting a hand on Chan’s shoulder. “It went well. I think Y/N had fun at the cafe and she asked me to claim her.”
Chan frowns. “Then why do you seem like you’re going to cry?”
That’s all it takes. Chan watches with wide eyes and parted lips as Minho lets out a shaky exhale, and then he notices the way Minho’s hands are trembling. It’s rare to see the alpha so shaken up, and instantly, Chan knows something is really wrong. His instincts when the alpha and you had walked through the front door were right; his heart falls to the pit of his stomach.
He’s stepping towards Chan before the older alpha can ask, though. Chan’s lips part as Minho all but falls into him, body still trembling, and presses his face into his neck.
“I want to kill Seojun.”
Chan’s eyes widen. It wasn’t like Minho hadn’t been just as angry towards your abuser but out of all the alpha’s, Minho had always been the calmest. The most level-head. He’d approached every incident with a clear head and a calm resolution. Chan had been internally so grateful for it. Minho helped Chan keep things calm, even when Chan himself had lost control of himself.
He’d been there when he’d lost his cool at your check up. And when Seungmin had walked in bruised and hurt with a in-heat you, Minho had helped keep everyone calm. And when they’d all individually lost control of themselves, Minho had been the one to reign them all in.
Remind them they couldn’t just go claws out for Seojun. That they had to think this through, be calm and rational. Not because Seojun didn’t deserve to suffer, but because they had you to think of too.
To hear Minho say those words with such…hatred.
Chan feels his chest tighten with worry.
“Lino? Baby, talk to me.”
Minho shakes his head, still pressed up against his neck. “She thought she didn’t deserve to be in the pack, hyung.”
It’s rare Minho calls Chan ‘hyung’ these days. When they’d first met, he’d done it all the time. But as they’d grown closer and Chan had started to lean on the second oldest, that sort of respect had faded into a closer relationship.
Chan feels his heart almost stop.
“What?”
Leaning back, Minho finally meets his eyes.
“I told her she did, of course I did. And I think I helped, at least a little,” Minho breathes, still holding onto Chan like he might fall apart if he doesn’t. “But my heart still hurts that she even thought it. That that fucking asshole has hurt her so much she thinks it’s her fault. Chan, I… I had to do everything to keep myself calm, to focus on her, when really all I wanted to do was rip that asshole's heart from his chest.”
Chan inhales sharply, reeling from the deep hatred radiating from Minho. All whilst trying to control his own anger.
“Come here, Lino,” Chan says, knowing he needs to be there for Minho now. It wasn’t often Minho needed comfort like this, and Chan was sure part of that was because he believed he needed to be stronger for the others. There’s no way he’s not going to do everything in his power to comfort him now.
Cradling him in his arms, Chan runs his fingers through Minho’s hair.
“You did the right thing, baby,” Chan whispers. “You helped her, that’s the most important thing.”
Chan feels the way Minho’s hands grip onto Chan’s shirt, holding tight enough to turn his knuckles white.
“We’re going to keep her safe, okay?” Chan says, for both himself and Minho. “We’re going to make sure she knows how loved she is.”
Inhaling sharply, Minho asks; “and Seojun?”
“And we’ll make sure Seojun pays for ever hurting her.”
Summary: They've been looking for the final member of their pack for years, a ache that never fades and always exists. Only, when they finally find you, they find a version of you that has been broken. Will they be able to make you whole again?
Pairing: Stray Kids OT8 x F!Reader
A/N: EARLY CHAPTER WOOOOOOO
Also, chapters are getting slightly longer from this point out! I am genuinely so excited to see your guys' reactions to all of them lol.
Chapter TW. Mention/allusion to non-con, stress-induced heat
“Shut up!” Seojun hisses, rolling his eyes at the cry that leaves your lips the second his hand meets your cheek. You just stare back at him, pressing a hand to the offended spot, hugging yourself best you can to cover yourself from the two pairs of eyes currently watching the both of you.
“I don’t care what you’re comfortable with,” Seojun hisses, glowering down at you. He grasps your jaw, holding tight. “What you want doesn’t matter.”
His words cut into you like a knife, twisting and digging in deeper. You want to say something, beg for him to stop, but you know rationally it won’t do anything. All it’ll do is cause you more pain in the end.
With a shaky breath and a trembling whimper, you turn your head, finding two sets of eyes on you. They watch you, closely, leering at you, laughing at your humiliation. They let their eyes trail across your naked and vulnerable figure, only laughing louder when you try to pitifully cover yourself.
They’re here to watch. Seojun’s friends.
Seojun would never let them touch you, even though they’d asked. He was far too possessive for that. But he seemed to get a sick joy out of having others watch.
Watch as he… did things to you.
Or maybe he just liked how much you didn’t. Enjoyed the way it’d make your eyes well with tears and your body tense in humiliation.
Letting your eyes fall shut, you desperately try to ignore the feeling of Seojun’s hands on you, of the eyes on you, of anything but what’s happening to you.
It never works.
“Y/N?”
This can’t be real.
You have to be imagining this.
Those eyes… they’re looking at you again.
Swallowing thickly, you take a step back, feeling your breath get caught in the back of your throat. The panic is crawling its way inside of you and you don’t know what to do.
A hand falls on your shoulder and you jump, a cry leaving your lips. You spin, your panic making you think it’s one of them, but instead, you find Seungmin staring down at you in panic.
That’s right. Seungmin. Seungmin was here.
Seungmin wouldn’t let them hurt you. Seungmin would never let them hurt you.
You turn back to them, the two of them, eyes settling on the one in the front who’d called for you.
You’d momentarily been assured at the thought that Seungmin would never let any harm come to you. And you still believed that, but… There were two of them and one of Seungmin.
The panic seizes you again.
“Y/N,” Seungmin calls, voice gentle. “Y/N, who are they?”
“Y/N!” The one who’d called for you before says, laughing. His name was Jung, and the other was Ha-joon. “It’s been such a long time! Seojun said you guys were having some trouble, but I guess you actually just ran off, huh?”
Your heart falls to the pit of your stomach at the sound of Seojun’s name. Seungmin tenses behind you.
“And who’s your friend?” Jung continues, the two now directly in front of you.
Swallowing thickly, you find your entire body trembling. You can’t do anything because you can’t think straight. You want to disappear. You don’t want to be here anymore. Even though you’re fully clothed, it still feels like they can see everything.
Then, there’s a shadow in front of you. It’s Seungmin.
You can’t see his face but his shoulders stand tense in front of you. He completely blocks you from view, and one of his hands reaches back towards you.
“Seungmin,” he says, voice low and dull, as if bored. “We’re actually just on our way home.”
Jung watches Seungmin for a moment, eyes trailing across him, before turning back to Ha-joon. They both smile at each other, and you have to fight back a whimper of fear.
“A beta, huh?” Jung says, raising a challenging brow. “What exactly do you think this is?”
“Whatever it is, I know Y/N wants nothing to do with either of you.”
Ha-joon laughs at that, loud and barking. It sounds exactly like that night. Like the many nights Seojun had forced you to…—
“If you know what’s good for you, you’ll leave before things get ugly.”
Seungmin just stares back. “Me and Y/N will happily do so.”
Jung’s eyes flash. “Y/N’ll be coming with us.”
And Seungmin hesitates for a moment. Silence echoes, thick and tense. Finally, Seungmin shakes his head. “Not happening.”
Scoffing, Jung laughs, mocking. “And how is a beta gonna stop two alphas?”
Seungmin shrugs, and then he’s pushing you back gently. He meets your eyes, warm and reassuring, making sure you’re far away enough before turning back to them, and raising his fists at the two. “Don’t know,” he says honestly. “But Y/N isn’t going anywhere she doesn’t want to. And she certainly isn’t going with you two.”
It’s a blur after that. You can barely hear your own screams and cries. Seungmin manages to take Ha-joon down on his own, but the victory doesn’t last long. Seungmin isn’t a fighter and adrenaline can only get someone so far. You remember Jung outside of those nights where he’d watch you, too. You’d known him in school, he was friends with Seojun then. Except, he was always getting into fights. He regularly walked into class with bruised knuckles. Only, his victim always looked worse.
He knew how to fight.
You watch Seungmin go down, screaming, tears streaming down your cheeks. It’s too much. All of it. There’s blood, Seungmin yells out in pain, and you’re sinking. Something cracks. Your omega cries at you, tells you to get away, and when you don’t move, she leaves, pulling you down with her. Everything just shuts down.
You just shut down.
You don’t hear the girls from across the street scream when they notice what’s happening, you don’t hear them yell they’re calling the police. You don’t hear the commotion that follows. Somewhere along the way, others crowd and Jung realizes he’s outnumbered. With a hiss, he grabs Ha-joon and moves to leave. Seungmin remains on the ground, but he shifts as Jung steps towards you.
You don’t notice.
You remember what he says to you before leaving though.
“I’ll find you. I’ll find you and bring you back to Seojun. Maybe then he’ll finally let me have you.”
After that, everything turns black.
"Seungmin?"
"You're bleeding!"
"Y/N! What happened?"
"Seungmin!"
"Just... Just—"
Chan watches, breath stuck in the back of his throat and heart racing madly against his chest, as Seungmin's eyes roll to the back of his head. His voice fall silent as his body gives up on him. His skin, which had already been a scary white beneath the bruises, turns paler as his strength gives out beneath him.
Jeongin, who'd been closest to the door given that he'd been seconds away from storming right out it, rushes forward. With him, the rest follow. Chan manages to reach the two only seconds after Jeongin, helping the younger alpha catch Seungmin and you before you both crash into the ground.
Jeongin shifts Seungmin, pulling him into his arms as Chan grabs you, cradling you close. Chan's first priority is looking over you for any injuries; Seungmin had walked in covered in them, and Chan was terrified of what he'd find on you.
There's nothing. Nothing that he can see, at least. You're unconscious, pale, and there's sweat clinging to your skin. But... But you don't look hurt.
Thank god.
Chan's eyes fall on Seungmin, still unconscious in Jeongin's arms, something terrible twisting in his chest.
"Are... Are they okay?"
Chan turns to Felix, seeing the worried look on the younger man's face, the furrow of his brows, the frown on his lips. His scent has soured in his distress.
All of their scents have.
Letting his eyes drift across the rest of the pack, Chan takes in the way Hyunjin has stepped towards Seungmin, looking over his wounds. Changbin's standing close, hands clenched by his sides, knuckles white. Minho has pulled a whimpering Han into his arms, trying to soothe the distressed omega.
"Y/N's okay," Chan says, voice cracking as he struggles to find it. "She's unconscious, but okay. Not... Not hurt."
Everyone eases, just a little.
"Seungmin is okay too," Hyunjin nods, glancing up from the beta to meet Chan's gaze. "He's hurt though. His wrist... looks sprained, if not worse. His eye is black, and his body is covered in bruises. Chan, this... this is beyond what I can do to help."
"Okay," Chan breathes. "We need to get him to Doctor Yoon."
"What happened?" Han asks then, voice small, trembling.
Felix shudders next to him. "Was it... Seojun?"
"Seungmin wouldn't have gotten into a fight for nothing," Changbin says, shaking his head. "He's logical. Smart. This had to have been him."
"How'd they get away then?" Hyunjin asks, huffing as he stands.
"They were in public," Changbin explains. "Someone must've saw."
"And you think that's why Seojun isn't at our front door right now?"
"That and we're a whole pack. With four alphas. Any smart alpha wouldn't dare."
Chan can tell he's losing control of the pack, voice blending in together, speaking over one another. The reality of it grips him by the throat, making him feel like he can't breathe.
"I wish the fucker would," Jeongin says then, speaking for the first time. His voice is different though—deeper, sharper, a growl. Chan's eyes fall to the young alpha, only to see his eyes glowing with rage. "So I could kill him myself."
"Jeongin—"
"Don't even try to tell me I'm overreacting." Jeongin hisses, sharp eyes zoning in on Felix.
The omega cowers back in response, a whimper leaving his lips.
"Seungmin's hurt and Y/N's unconscious," Jeongin continues, voice turning more inhuman as he gets himself more worked up. His grip is tightening on Seungmin, inadvertly turning harmful as his claws dig into the betas arms. "In fact, I'm gonna go out there right now and find him myself. And when I do, I'll make sure he—"
"Chan."
It's Minho. Low, forceful and demanding.
Chan turns to him, still holding and consoling a now crying Han, but his eyes are on Chan. And his meaning is obvious, without him even having to say it.
Do something.
It snaps Chan out of his revere. He takes in his pack, his distressed omegas, his angry baby alpha, his hurt beta and you.
Sitting up straighter, Chan turns to Jeongin. "Jeongin, calm down. Now." The younger alpha turns to him, eyes flashing just for a moment before he meets his pack alpha's gaze. Instantly, he's blinking out of his self and cowering back in submission.
Chan sighs. He hates using his alpha voice, but he had to get control of the situation. Minho had reminded him of that fact. "I know we're angry and upset, but Seungmin and Y/N come first. We need to get Seungmin help and we need to make sure Y/N is okay when she wakes up."
"I'll take him to Doctor Yoon," Changbin says then and Chan is more than grateful for him stepping up and keeping a sound mind. He couldn't handle another out of control alpha, not when he's barely keeping it together himself.
"I'll take Y/N," Minho offers, stepping forward with Han. "And it's best the omegas are here when she wakes up."
Chan hums in agreement.
"I'll go with Changbin," Hyunjin says, nodding.
"Ayen," Chan calls, pulling the younger boys gaze back on him. The alpha's anger has faded into shameful guilt. Chan makes sure his voice is soft when he speaks. "Me and you are going to cool off, okay? We'll keep the house safe, yeah?"
Slowly, Jeongin nods. His grip remains tight on Seungmin, but not harmful, protective.
Then, a soft whimper leaves your lips. All eyes turn fall on you, Chan's arms tensing around you as he glances down at you in his lap. A quick look tells him you're still unconscious, and for a moment, his brows furrow, confused.
Then the smell hits him.
Changbin's eyes widen; "is she...?"
"She's going into heat," Felix says, leaning forward in worry. "It's probably from the stress."
The scent overwhelms Chan, momentarily taking over his senses. The pack notices and Chan is grateful for the way Felix pulls you out of his lap so Chan can stand and take a deep breath.
"Changbin," Minho calls, "you and Hyunjin take Seungmin. Chan, take yourself and Ayen outside, now. I'll stay. We all know I have the best control of my senses when it comes to scents."
That's right. Yes. Minho does.
Minho... Minho would be able to help you.
The omegas too.
Right now, Chan could only help by getting away, even if his alpha cried not to. Jeongin, he thinks.
Jeongin needs him.
So that's what he focused on.
It’s hot. Too hot.
And everything hurts.
It’s all you can focus on as your eyes flicker open. The pain.
Your vision is blurred, dazed, your mind a fog, and somewhere along the way you realize you’re in heat.
“Shh. Shh,” a voice calls out to you, a hand brushing hair away from your sweaty face. “You’re okay, Y/N. You’re okay.”
You don’t recognize the voice. Not at first. Their voice is muffled by the pounding in your ears.
What happened? Where were you? Why were you in heat?
You were supposed to have at least another week, if not more, before your heat.
It all comes flooding back then. Jung and Ha-joon. Seojun.
Seungmin.
Seungmin.
“Seungmin,” you croak, voice cracking. “Where’s Seungming? Is Seungmin okay?”
The hand falls on your face, then, soothing, gentle. You know instantly it isn’t Seojun. It isn’t Jung or Ha-joon either. It can’t be. Seungmin protected you. Seungmin got hurt because of you.
“Doctor Yoon is checking on him right now, Y/N.” The voice says and you blink, peering through blurred vision to find Minho over you. “He’s okay. He’s okay, I promise.”
You reach out for Minho blindly, he takes your hand in his. “It’s my fault,” you cry, shifting on the bed as you cry out in pain. “It’s my fault.”
“It’s not,” Minho says sternly. “None of it is.”
You just cry, curling into yourself further.
“Y/N,” Minho calls, “listen to me. You’ve gone into a stress-induced heat. Can you hear me?”
Eyes scrunching shut, your nails dig into his hand that still holds yours, the heat making it feel like you can’t breathe.
“You’re in heat,” Minho repeats, voice sharper. “You need someone to help you. You need release. Someone to make you feel better.”
“Come on, Y/N. I can make you feel better.”
“No!” You cry, feeling his hands, pressing into you, forcing you. You feel those eyes, watching you, leering at you. “NO!”
Minho doesn’t pull away. But he doesn’t touch you elsewhere either.
“Okay, okay. No one will touch you, okay? I promise. We can get you toys to help,” Minho says. “But you shouldn’t be alone.”
Whimpering, you blink up at him. Somewhere in the back of your mind you know he’s right.
“Who do you want?”
“Seungmin,” you say.
Minho frowns. “Seungmin isn’t here, kitten. Hyunjin and Changbin are gone too. What about the omegas? Huh? How about Felix or Han?”
You want Seungmin, you want to make sure he’s okay. You need to see he’s okay. But even in your fatigue, you know Minho can’t make that happen.
Dazedly, you nod.
“Okay, kitten. I’ll get them. They’ll help you, okay?”
Your heat lasts two days.
It’s shorter than normal because it arrived early due to what happened. For those two days, Han and Felix take turns watching you and helping you. No one else is allowed in your room other than them, as per Minho’s rules. Even when later that first night, Seungmin returns home, Minho doesn’t let him into your room.
“She wasn’t thinking clearly,” Minho says, “she didn’t know what she wanted. She was upset and stressed. Plus her scent was strong, really strong. It took everything in me to keep my control.”
No one argues.
You spend most of it ignoring the toys Minho brought and instead curling into yourself. Both Felix and Han try to coax you to use them, reassuring you that it’ll help you, but you refuse them.
The best they can do is comfort you and make sure you eat and drink water.
When the heat ends and the fog lifts from your mind, you don’t hesitate.
“Y/Nnie,” Felix frowns, hands held out for you. “You should really rest.”
You just shake your head, making your way out of your room and straight to the living room. You move slowly, still weak, but determined. You follow your sense of smell, not stopping until you find Seungmin, laying back on the couch. He sits up at the sight of you, staring back at you.
You frown as you take him in.
There’s a brace around his wrist. His left eye is still black. His upper lip is swollen. There’s bruises lining the skin you can see.
The tears come before you can stop them.
Felix freezes behind you. Changbin, Han and Hyunjin who’d been sitting on the couch stand in a panic the second you start crying. Chan and Minho come running out from the kitchen. Jeongin stumbles out from his bedroom, having smelt your panicked scent.
No one moves though. And you don’t look away from Seungmin.
“It’s my fault,” you say, echoing the words you’d cried to Minho before in a panic. “It’s my fault you’re so hurt.”
The whole pack is there, but no one moves. Han and Felix, who’d normally be the first to comfort you, don’t. Everyone knows this is between you and Seungmin.
“It’s not,” Seungmin says after a moment, standing. “I would do that for any of the pack members.”
You let out a sob, hands brushing the tears from your face uselessly.
Seungmin makes his way over to you.
“It’s not your fault,” he whispers, raising his hand to cup your cheek. He pulls your teary eyes on him and offers you a small gentle smile. “I should’ve done more to protect you.”
And he says it almost as if he’s the one who should feel guilty.
It breaks your heart all over again.
You fall into his arms, suddenly and for a moment, Seungmin thinks of your date at the karaoke bar, when you’d jumped into his arms in excitement. When the two of you had sung that duet song and scored a perfect hundred. This time, you fall into his arms in tears, sobbing into his neck. No excitement, only hurt.
Seungmin wishes he could have that moment in the bar all over again.
But he can’t. So, instead, he pulls you closer, and lets you cry.
That night, without any words needing to be said, it’s obvious who you go to.
Seungmin.
In his bed, wearing one of his shirts, Seungmin lets you curl yourself around him. He isn’t that used to cuddling. It isn’t like he hasn’t cuddled with the others before, especially Felix or Han, but it doesn’t happen as often as it might with some of the other members. Felix naturally drifted towards Hyunjin, Changbin or Chan. And nine times out of ten, Han went to Minho. Occasionally he’d cuddle with Jeongin too. The others liked to cuddle, but not overtly.
But never really him.
He finds he likes it more than he thought he would.
“I never thanked you.”
Seungmin turns to you as you whisper the words, meeting your eyes. “You don’t have to.”
He watches as you raise your hand, eyes fluttering shut as you softly brush the tips of your fingers over his black eye.
“I do,” you whisper, because it's just a fact. Seungmin assured you he'd do it for anyone, and you believed that. But it still mattered that he did it for you. “Thank you, Minnie.”
You see the way Seungmin stills, not in an uncomfortable way, but clearly caught off guard. The tips of his ears burn a bright red and his gaze lowers.
"Y-You're welcome," he mutters, voice soft.
Despite everything, it pulls a smile to your lips. Seungmin truly was adorable.
Leaning forward back into his embrace, you let your voice flal to a quiet hum. “And even though the date got interrupted, I did truly have a wonderful time.”
Blinking, Seungmin’s lips part. “You did?”
“Yeah,” you smile softly. “I loved it.”
He leans into your touch; “I’m glad.”
And the silence echoes for a moment before you whisper; “can you do one more thing for me?”
“Anything.”
Seungmin truly means it.
“Can you claim me?”
That catches his attention. Eyes widening, Seungmin’s lips part. “You want my bite?”
You hum; “I do.”
“Are you sure?”
“Positive.”
And the way you say it so sincerely, without hesitation, makes his heart flutter.
“Okay,” he nods, “I want yours too.”
That makes you smile. “Okay.”
The night ends with you both claiming one another. It’s slow, tender, careful because of both of your wounds, mental and physical. When it’s done and Seungmin’s bite joins the other three on your neck, you fall asleep against his side with a content smile.
Seungmin finds himself staring once again, lost in the beauty of your smile.
He never wants to see the fear he’d seen on you that night ever again.
And he swears he’ll make sure it never happens again.
Summary: They've been looking for the final member of their pack for years, a ache that never fades and always exists. Only, when they finally find you, they find a version of you that has been broken. Will they be able to make you whole again?
Pairing: Stray Kids OT8 x F!Reader
A/N: I'm actually so excited for this chapter and the next because some ANGST is coming yall
Chapter TW. Mention/allusion to non-con, unconsensual voyeurism, fighting, mention of bruises and blood, angst, hurt/comfort.
A peaceful quiet. Seungmin hummed softly to himself as you let your eyes wander across the streets, taking in the setting sun and brisk night air through the cracked open window.
It was the weekend, a few days after your date with Han, and it was Seungmin’s turn. As opposed to the other three dates you’ve been on, Seungmin was a lot more nonchalant about the whole thing. Or, at least, he tried to be. Changbin had told you the beta had been planning the date to perfection since the idea of these dates were first brought up, tossing and turning over where to take you.
Seungmin didn’t know you knew this and you’d decided you wouldn’t tell him. You didn’t want to embarrass him and you were more than happy just knowing he cared.
You’re pulled from your thoughts as the car slows to a stop. Blinking, you sit up, glancing around to see where he’d taken you. Seungmin had insisted it was a surprise and wouldn’t tell you, nor let anyone else tell you (which Hyunjin had tried with a shit-eating grin).
“Karaoke?” You echo, reading the giant neon sign right above your head. Turning to Seungmin, you raise a brow. “We’re gonna sing?”
Seungmin hums. “I bought us a private room so you don’t have to worry about anyone but me hearing you.” He explains, meeting your eyes before hesitating. “But if it really makes you uncomfortable, we can always—”
You don’t even let him finish the thought. Knowing how hard he’d tried to find a fun and interesting date for you two to do, even a moment of hesitation and doubt in his eyes broke your heart.
“No, I don’t mind,” you reassure softly, smiling gently as you pull your cardigan tighter around yourself. “Just don’t judge me if my voice is awful.”
Seungmin brightens at that, smile brightening and tension easing.
“I’ll try not to.”
Seungmin was enamoured.
Sitting there, in that small private karaoke room, watching you sing without a care in the world… he couldn’t take his eyes off of you. You were beautiful, in every single way. You’d been nervous at first, he could tell, glancing around unsure, but smiling every time you caught Seungmin’s gaze. He sang first, just to try and ease you into it, and you’d complimented him on his voice, gushing over it.
Seungmin’s heart was still racing at your kind words, that warmth in his belly never disappearing at hearing such genuine words from you. Singing was something Seungmin passionately enjoyed, it’s why he’d chosen the karaoke bar. He figured this was a good way to invite you into his life, into what he was passionate about, without overwhelming you.
He’d spent the last few days stressing over where to take you, how to make the date worth it. He wanted to give you a night you’d remember. After all, the chance to have a night with you, alone, was special. He didn’t want to mess it up.
He didn’t want to do just a dinner or just a walk. Those things weren’t him. But when he thought about singing, about how happy it made him, how getting lost in the music and the moment helped him find peace, even just briefly, he knew that was it. He wanted to give you an outlet, a way for you to just… lose yourself in the moment.
And it seemed it’d worked.
After a rocky and nervous beginning, you’d seemingly found your pace. It had been like a switch had gone off. One minute you’re singing with a small, somewhat shaky voice and the next, you’re meeting Seungmin’s eyes, and he’s smiling at you and it’s like everything else fades to the background. You start singing, truly, eyes lighting up with something he’s not yet seen.
And you just… let it all go.
Seungmin can’t take his eyes off of you. He doesn’t want to. He doesn’t want to miss one second of this moment. He loves his pack more than anything but he’s truly glad it’s just the two of you then, that he has you all to himself, that he can stare at you without worrying about anyone else seeing it.
That he can fall in love with you even more.
When the song finishes, you turn to him with a breathless, elated smile. Seungmin, despite himself, mimics it.
“How was I?” You ask and something on your face makes Seungmin realize you’re desperate for his approval.
As if he’d ever deny you it.
“Amazing,” he says, not even recognizing his own voice. Seungmin wasn’t usually so warm and mushy, but you brought something out in him so few could.
You laugh, sitting back on the couch beside him. “I was not,” you flush. “My voice was shaky.”
“No it wasn’t,” Seungmin shakes his head, turning to face you. “It was beautiful.”
You blink at that, eyes widening briefly. The flush on your cheeks intensifies and Seungmin worries for a moment he’d been too honest, too much, but then you’re smiling so warmly he never wants to forget the sight of it.
“Do you want to sing a duet?” You ask, head tilting curiously.
“A duet?” Seungmin echoes, turning back to the screen. “Sure.”
He lets you choose. You take a few moments, letting a few songs play before shaking your head. He just watches, content.
You choose Dream by Suzy and Bakhyun. Seungmin feels his heart race a little when he realizes you've chosen a love song.
Lifting his mic, Seungmin starts;
You are beautiful just as you were yesterday.
No, you’re more beautiful than you were yesterday.
And as he sings, he lets his gaze trail over to you. You’re already looking at him, smiling wide and encouragingly, swaying softly to the beat of the song.
When I say something like this
You always change subjects pretending you didn’t hear anything.
You lift your microphone, cheeks warm, ears red, and softly sing;
I had really sweet dreams yesterday
Because I’m too shy
I don’t wanna tell you now
And also it’s not very good to tell someone this kind of thing
Dream that I can never have again
That was really sweet
I think you are just like the dream.
It’s only thanks to the soft laugh you let out as you signal that it’s his turn that he lifts his microphone, having lost himself in you.
Dream that I get to keep thinking about all day
That was really sweet
That’s you
People say we’re a really cute couple
I know, she knows
Actually I also think so
But sometimes I get worried about you
And then I feel sad alone
You lift your mic, turning back to the TV to read your lines.
Hmm, you’re telling a lie
With the look full of confidence
But that’s so sweet to hear
Dream, that I can never have again
That was really sweet
I think you are just like the dream
You look right at him as you sing the last line. Seungmin’s ears turn red.
Dream that I get to keep think about all day
That was really sweet
That’s you
You step side to side, feeling yourself in the music as you lift your microphone again.
Well I don’t care
Even if you’re a sweet liar
Seungmin lifts his own to follow;
Well I don't care
Cause I will make you believe
And then, together, you both sing;
Dream, when you look
At me just like that
I feel like you’re so mine
Dream, that makes me want to fall asleep again
Such a sweet dream
That’s you
The song finishes with its final chord and you turn to the tv, eyes shining as you wait for the score to pop up.
A perfect hundred.
Seungmin just manages to catch you as you jump into his arms, stumbling back on his feet as he wraps his arms around your waist. You giggle into his ear, ecstatic at the score, and while Seungmin is also impressed by the score, he finds the feeling of you in his arms better than anything else.
You pull back a moment later, meeting his eyes with a shy smile.
“Sorry,” you say, “I just can’t believe we scored perfectly.”
Seungmin shakes his head; “you can jump into my arms any time.”
He hardly realizes he says it. His naturally sarcastic side slips in before he can stop himself and with wide eyes, Seungmin’s lips part. “I-I mean…”
Setting your hands on his shoulders, you shake your head. “If we score another perfect score I definitely will.” You tease him, smiling wide at him.
Seungmin stares back at you, wide eyed.
The two of you take turns singing a couple more songs. He lets you choose his songs, enjoying the way you compliment him afterwards.
“Your voice is literally that of an angel, Seungmin.”
He definitely will be singing around you a lot more if that’s the response he’ll get every time.
Eventually you both take a break, ordering some food.
Seungmin’s fine to eat in a comfortable silence, like he usually is. You, however, seem to be bouncing with an excitement he hasn’t yet seen on you, not that he minds. You also seem to decide that now's the time to get to know Seungmin better.
“What are you going to school for?”
“I’m taking classes specializing in media studies,” Seungmin answers, taking a bite of the food.
Your eyes widen; “that’s so cool.”
Flushing, Seungmin shakes his head. “It’s really not.”
“It is,” you insist and Seungmin finds he can’t argue with you when you pout like that. “I wish I’d gone to school for something…”
“Did you want to?” He asks, “I mean… before Seojun…”
You nod. “I didn’t really know what, just that I did,” you explain, shrugging. “I’d still like to.”
“We can figure something out,” Seungmin says, meeting your eyes. “Like we did for Lixie. If you really want to go, that is.”
Your eyes brighten at that. “I do.”
“Then we’ll make it happen.”
The conversation continues on like that. While the two of you eat, you ask him a multitude of questions ranging from silly to serious. You ask him questions about his childhood, about how it was finding the pack, about his favourite animal, and more.
When you’re both done eating, Seungmin tells you that he only has the room booked for another hour.
“Let’s not waste it then,” you say, beaming at him.
The sun has already set by the time the two of you are done.
Seungmin’s hand rests on your lower back as he guides you out of the karaoke bar, telling you he’s just going to text Chan quickly. You nod, watching as he pulls his phone from his pocket, pulling open his and Chan’s messages.
You let your eyes wander around, eyes falling on a group of girls across the road, clearly drunk and giggling with each other as they make their way out of a bar.
You watch them for a moment, lost in the freedom of their actions. It makes you wonder if you never met Seojun if that’s what you’d be doing now. If that’s how you’d be. Carefree, drunk on a Saturday night, giggling with your friends.
Turning back to Seungmin, letting your eyes drift across the side of his face as his brows furrow at something Chan says and think back on the night you two just had, and the dates you’d spent with Felix, Han and Chan and the ones still to come, you realize you’re content with the way your life is now regardless. You never want to relive what Seojun had put you through, but it had led you to your pack.
And you’d never regret that.
Seungmin slides his phone back in his pocket, turning to you. “Okay, so I told Chan we’re on our way home. However, is—”
But you don’t hear a word he’s saying.
“Y/N?”
“They’re still not home?”
Minho shakes his head. “When did Seungmin text you again?”
“Over an hour ago,” Chan frowns, eyeing his phone in case he’d somehow missed a text from Seungmin. There’s nothing. “It should’ve only taken them twenty minutes to get back from the karaoke bar. And if they’d stopped somewhere for something, Seungmin would’ve told me.”
Changbin sighs; “it’s not like Seungmin to be late.”
“No,” Minho agrees. “Have you tried calling him?”
Chan nods. “Three times. It goes straight to voicemail.”
“Should we—”
“What’s going on?”
Everyone turns to the hall as Felix’s words cut Changbin off, turning to find not only the omega but Han and Jeongin as well.
Felix’s eyes trail from Changbin to Chan, taking in everyone’s worried expressions and frowns heavier.
“Where’s Y/N/N and Seungminnie?”
Hyunjin hesitates, turning to the three alphas.
“Guys?” Jeongin presses, stepping forward.
“They’re not home yet,” Minho says, voice careful.
Han shakes his head; “it’s quite late. They should’ve been home by now.”
“I know,” Chan sighs, running a hand through his hair.
“Do you think something could’ve happened to them?” Felix asks, wringing his hands with worry.
Hyunjin stands then, moving towards the omega and pulling him into his arms. “I’m sure they’re okay,” he says to Felix before turning to the rest of the pack. “Maybe Seungmin just forgot to text us and they went to get food or something?”
Changbin sighs. “They would’ve had food at the bar.” He says, frowning. “And again, Seungmin’s not the type to not keep us updated. Especially with Y/N.”
“You think… Seojun found them?” Han asks, eyes widening as his voice pitches in concern.
Minho steps towards him, attempting to calm the omega. “Let’s not assume the worst case scenario.”
“Han’s right though,” Jeongin shakes his head. “What if they ran into that asshole?”
Everyone hesitates, glancing at one another.
“I’m going,” Jeongin suddenly says, stepping forward. “What karaoke bar did they go to again? I’ll start there and then—”
But before he can finish, the door swings open, revealing a bloodied Seungmin, holding you in his arms, unconscious.
Summary: They've been looking for the final member of their pack for years, a ache that never fades and always exists. Only, when they finally find you, they find a version of you that has been broken. Will they be able to make you whole again?
It’s early. You can tell by the way the sun shines through the window and casts a yellow halo over Felix. The sight brings a smile to your face, noticing how the omega’s face is buried in the crook of your neck with one leg slouched over you. Han, on your other side, is sprawled in a similar position.
There’s an arm stretched over all three of you. Jeongin’s. The arm over Han’s waist is Minho’s, who’s then being cuddled by Seungmin with a hand clutched tightly around the alpha’s leg. Hyunjin’s got a koala grip on Felix, clinging to his back and Changbin’s foot is dangerously near Hyunjin’s face where he sleeps sprawled in the other direction.
The sight is domestic, a little silly and absolutely warms your heart.
The only one not there is Chan. The realization causes you to frown.
The last thing you remember from the day before is crying so hard you’d passed out. You distantly remember Jeongin cooing at you as Felix and Han clung to you like a second skin. Somewhere along the way your eyes had been red and puffy from crying and sleep had come naturally.
Detangling yourself from the overly large cuddle pile is more difficult than you expected, especially since you seem to be the center of it. You’re careful to pull yourself from Han and Felix’s arms without waking either of them, propping a pillow under Felix’s head when it slips off your shoulders. Jeongin stirs but is clearly a heavy sleeper and simply cuddles into Seungmin instead.
Han and Felix naturally find each other and the two wrap themselves into each other's embrace unconsciously. Everyone else just sort of naturally follows.
The sight melts your heart.
You almost regret leaving. But the lack of Chan is too present to ignore.
With soft steps, you maneuver your way out of the living room and down the hall. You’re still learning the layout of this far too large home and you still get lost turning corners without one of the boys to guide you. You know Chan isn’t in the kitchen cause his scent lingers the opposite way, so you figure he’s probably in his room.
You still haven’t been in all of the boys' rooms. In fact, the only one you’ve fully been in is Felix’s when you slept there the first night. You’d been in Hyunjin’s and Seungmin’s when you’d asked them to scent things for your nest, but you haven’t been in any of the others.
Chan’s scent leads you to the room at the far end of the hall. The last door.
You hesitate knocking.
Chan sits up straighter at the smell of your scent.
It’s close. Really close and getting closer.
He pauses, looking at his phone to check the time and seeing it was only five in the morning. He wasn’t expecting any of the boys or you to be up anytime soon. His entire pack was a bunch of heavy sleepers; and although some were early risers like Seungmin or Minho, five in the morning was still too early for them.
Especially after an emotional day like yesterday.
He didn’t know whether you were a morning person or not. The past two days had been you waking up as a result of the others. Chan had assumed today would be no different, especially wrapped up in a cuddle pile like that.
But now you’re standing right outside his door.
He hesitates for a moment, listening. He waits for you to knock, but when a moment passes and he doesn’t hear anything, he figures you’re unsure if you’re allowed to. The realization pulls a frown to his lips and he stands to his feet, reaching his bedroom door in seconds. When he pulls it open, you’re standing there, eyes still puffy and sleepy, hand hovering in front of you.
“Chan,” you breathe, voice a soft whisper. “Sorry, I… I wasn’t sure—”
“Would you like to come in?” He cuts in gently, stepping back and extending a hand towards his room. He figures it’s best to just invite you in; no better way to reassure you he doesn’t mind than inviting you in.
With one more shy glance his way, you make your way in.
“You weren’t there with everyone else,” you say after you’ve walked in, spinning to face him. “I was concerned.”
Chan’s eyes widen faintly at that, his alpha pleased to hear you were concerned about him. Shutting his door, he turns to you with a smile. “I often get up earlier than the boys,” he explains, walking over to his desk where his laptop, two desktop monitors and the entire set up exists. “I was working on some tracks.”
You wander over, eyes wide and curious. “You, Hannie and Changbin own a producing company. I remember.” You say, keeping your hands to yourself but still eagerly letting your eyes drag across the entire elaborate set up.
Chan laughs. “Yes, 3Racha,” he nods. “We’ve got some deadlines coming up. Thought I’d get a crack at a few of them.”
You meet his eyes then, shy and nervous. “Oh,” you frown. “I’m sorry if you’ve been delayed because of me…”
Chan just shakes his head, pulling the chair back out and turning it towards you. “Nonsense,” he dismisses with ease. “Would you like to listen?”
Your lips part; “can… can I?”
“Of course,” he assures, and gestures to you to sit. You listen, looking entirely too small in his seat as you sit there, mesmerized eyes still drifting across everything. Chan is swift as he sets everything up, placing the headset over your eyes before clicking play. He watches you closely, and loves the way your eyes light up as soon as the track starts in your ears.
He always loves seeing people react to his music. He’s quite confident in his skills and relatively, the response is positive. 3Racha wouldn’t be as successful as it was after all if he, Han and Changbin weren’t skilled. But your reaction?
It’s his favourite.
There’s a certain light, a life that floods into your gaze. It’s like you’re experiencing music for the first time. Realistically, Chan knows you’ve heard music before, but he also knows you’ve been deprived of a lot of things the past few years.
He studies you closely, hoping he isn’t making you uncomfortable. His eyes trace your own, watching as your head bobs to the beat, before trailing lower. Your fingers tap on your arms, your left leg is tapping to the beat as well. He lets his eyes trail back up, this time settling on your lips.
Your soft, inviting lips.
Swallowing thickly, Chan’s hands seem to move on their own. Before he realizes it, he’s reaching for you. He wouldn’t usually touch you like this without your permission, but his alpha assures him, somehow seems to know, that it’ll be okay. And so he lets his hand reach for you, let’s it cup around your jaw, slow and tentative, before guiding your face towards his own.
You’re pliant in his grasp. You let him do whatever, not an ounce of fear. And that’s what Chan is careful to search for; any trace of discomfort or fear. There’s none. You’re content, happy even. Maybe a little nervous, but it isn’t a bad thing.
Your eyes meet his and then Chan is staring at your lips again.
Surprisingly, you make the first move.
You lean forward, pressing your lips against his own. The feeling is euphoric. Chan melts into it. Your lips are heaven against his own, soft and plump and everything he’d been wanting and more.
Then, you pull away, shy, cheeks flushed, and meet his eyes through your lashes.
“Was that okay?”
Chan nods; “more than,” he whispers, voice a low husk. “I didn’t make you uncomfortable?”
You shake your head; “no, but…” And you hesitate, as if afraid the next words out of your mouth will disappoint him. Which is impossible, you could never disappoint him. “But I don’t think I could do… more than kissing.”
His face softens at that.
“Of course,” Chan says, and he really means it. He would never force you to do anything you weren’t comfortable with. He shouldn’t have even tried to kiss you, he’d just found himself wrapped up in the moment. Any sign of discomfort from you though and he would’ve pulled away.
“It’s never an expectation,” Chan says, “and you never have to do it if you don’t want to.”
You frown; “my heat though…”
“You won’t spend it alone, but that doesn’t mean anything has to happen,” Chan assures. “There are other ways for you to be satisfied without anyone touching you. Or, at the least, going all the way.”
You swallow thickly, lowering your gaze. Chan quickly pulls it back up, thumb still pressed against your chin, strong and steady. “Okay?”
You nod; “okay.”
He smiles then, wide and warm, and takes the headset off your ears.
“Did you like it?”
“I loved it,” you smile and it takes Chan’s breath away. “You’re amazing.”
Cheeks warming, Chan shakes his head. “You’re amazing.”
You bite your lip at that and Chan can’t help but notice the way your eyes trail to his lips again.
“Hey Chan?”
“Hmm?”
“Can I ask you to do something for me?”
“Of course, baby. Anything.”
“Can you mark me?”
That takes Chan’s breath away. The gentle caressing he’d been brushing against your cheek halts with his surprise and his lips part as he stares down at you, so prettily sat in his chair, looking up at him with pleading eyes.
“You mean…?”
You nod; “I want you to mark me. I know it’s something usually done while… but I don’t think I’ll be ready for that for a while. But I want it. I want to be mated to you. All of you.”
Chan crouches then, moving so you’re the one staring down at him. His hand shifts, taking yours in his. “Your wound still hasn’t healed, baby,” he reminds.
“This would help it, right?” You ask, “I heard Doctor Yoon. I know what a soulmark does. I… I want it.”
“From me?”
“From you,” you affirm.
Squeezing your hand, Chan meets your gaze; “are you absolutely sure, Y/N? I would love nothing more than to make you mine, but I need you to be sure about this.”
You reach forward then, with your free hand, and let your fingers drift across Chan’s own markings. All seven of them. Four on either side of his neck, along his collarbone.
You meet his eyes again. “I’m sure.”
Chan moves you to the bed. He wants you to be comfortable. He wants this to be special. He sits first and has you sit on his lap, letting you wrap yourself around him. He asks if you want to mark him first and you nod, shy.
So, he lets you choose, baring his neck to you when you’ve chosen the spot.
“You just bite, baby,” he guides, hands resting loosely on your hips. “You won’t hurt me.”
You’re slow, tentative. Your breath is warm against his neck as you lean in. He feels your teeth graze his neck first, poking and then pulling away, before you press your mouth against him. He shivers at the touch, heart racing, fingers pinching slightly on your hips. Your hands brace themselves on his shoulders and then you bite.
Chan’s eyes flutter shut, eyes rolling to the back of his head. The feeling is exhilarating. It hurts but in a good way. You bite soft at first, before pushing harder, allowing your teeth to break the skin and draw blood.
And when you pull away, lips coating with his blood, looking unsure but pupils blown, Chan feels his alpha in him break.
He holds himself back, though. This isn’t about him, this is about you.
“Good job, baby girl,” he praises, wiping the blood off your lips with a gentle thumb.
You lean into his touch, eyes fluttering.
“You ready for me?” He asks, wanting to make sure. “Or have you changed your mind?”
Because if you had, it would be okay. He’ll wait eternity for you if he has to.
“No,” you shake your head. You sound more determined than before, which assures Chan. There’s a certain lilt to your tone too, a certain desperation. “I want you to do it. I’m ready.”
Chan nods, shifting to pull you closer. He braces a hand against your back, the other on the back of your head, and guides your head to the side, baring your neck. He lets you pull the bandage off your neck, eyes darkening faintly at the sight of the healing but still present wound.
He’s going to fix it.
He waits for your confirmation, waits until he hears you whisper; “I’m ready,” and then he leans forward. He’s more confident, swifter than you, but still careful. He positions his mouth right over the wound, the bite Seojun had tried to force on you, and bites down a second later. He lets his teeth breath the skin. You let out a whimper, grip tightening on his shoulder, and Chan stills, just briefly, waiting for some sort of signal that this is too much.
You never give it.
So he bites more, lets his teeth fully sink in, and holds it. He caresses the back of your head as he does, soothing any discomfort you might be feeling.
When he pulls away, you’re both breathing heavily, chests rising and falling, and Chan smiles up at you.
“Was that okay, baby?”
You nod, easing his worries. His hands shift to hold your hips, squeezing, and presses a swift, gentle kiss to your lips.
“Words, sweetheart.”
“I’m okay,” you assure, leaning into his kiss. “I’m more than okay?”
Meeting your eyes, Chan hums; “yeah?”
“Yeah,” you nod again, smiling wide. The sight is beautiful, Chan thinks. “It doesn’t hurt anymore.”
Blinkin, Chan’s face wavers faintly. “Your neck?”
You hum in agreement. “It’s been aching ever since Seojun bit there. Just a dull, persistent ache.” You explain, and Chan frowns at the thought that you’ve been in discomfort this entire time. “But it’s gone now. And it’s thanks to you.”
Cheeks flushed, eyes warm, you beam at Chan. His alpha howls in response.
“I’m glad to hear that, Y/N,” Chan smiles.
You lean forward at that, eyes fluttering. “Thank you, Channie.”
It makes his heart flutter, warmth spreading through him. He was so unbelievably happy to be seeing you opening up to all of them. And he was so proud that you trusted him with something as intimate and vulnerable as this.
He’d never forget the trust you placed in him today.
“Of course, baby,” he coos, brushing his thumb against your cheek. “You’re ours now. I’ll always take care of you.”
Summary: They've been looking for the final member of their pack for years, a ache that never fades and always exists. Only, when they finally find you, they find a version of you that has been broken. Will they be able to make you whole again?
Pairing: Stray Kids OT8 x F!Reader
Chapter TW. Mention of/Allusion to non-con, suggestive content, physical and verbal abuse (obviously all not from SKZ) This one deals with heavy stuff guys, please take care of yourselves
You’d told yourself you were ready, but having all eight of the boys sat around you, waiting for you to speak, made you a different level of nervous.
Swallowing thickly, your palms are slick with sweat as you rub them against your pants, trying anything at this point to get the racing beat of your heart to calm down. It’s so loud, thudding against your ears, that you can’t even hear your own thoughts.
You’re sure you would’ve rubbed your palms raw had two hands not fallen over either one of them. Lips parting, you’re pulled from your own thoughts. You glance to your left first, catching Han’s waiting gaze and gummy smile, and then to your right, finding Felix staring back at you with the same warm gaze and reassuring smile.
Instantly, you feel your shoulders ease.
“If you’re not ready, Y/N, we don’t have to do this now,” Chan calls, leaning forward from where he sits across from you. The look on his face is kind, a soft expression of understanding on his face.
When you look across the pack, everyone is looking at you the same way.
“No,” you whisper, nodding to yourself. Squeezing both Han and Felix’s hands, you turn to Chan with a determined look on your face. “I’m ready.”
“Still, take your time,” Minho nods. “There’s no rush.”
You listen, taking a deep breath in. You don’t let go of either Han or Felix’s hands, simply because having something to hold on to gives you the encouragement to stay strong.
Then, you just… start.
“I presented as an omega when I was seventeen,” you say, whispering the words. “I was still in high school, like most people are when they present. He…—Seojun,” you force out, refusing to let the name scare you any longer. “Had presented as an alpha the year before, when he was sixteen.
“I knew him in passing. We shared a couple of classes together, and had been assigned partners for a project once, but that was really it. When I presented though, he told me we were fated soulmates. It feels stupid now, but I believed him. I was seventeen, had just presented as an omega, and had no one, so when he told me he’d been looking for me his whole life, I fell in love with him.”
Swallowing thickly, you glance at your feet. You still remember how ecstatic you’d been that day. Young and impressionable, hearing someone tell you that you were everything they’d been waiting for and more, had been enough to convince you that he was your true love.
Even though you know now that that had been the worst mistake of your life.
“It was okay at first,” you continue, “great, even. Seojun was sweet, loving and attentive. I was the happiest I’d ever been. When we graduated, we moved in together. His father owned a big company, and so his parents bought him a house. I lived alone in a shitty apartment and had already been spending almost every night at his parents house, so it wasn’t hard to convince me to move in with him.”
You hesitate at that, your breath getting caught in the back of your throat.
Han squeezes your hand, Felix caresses the back of your neck to help distract you.
“Everything changed then,” you finally say. “It started slow. Small changes. He got angry at things that used to make him laugh. He got more possessive, didn’t want me leaving the house without him, didn’t want me going to school or getting a job. He started to control every aspect of my life. And then… then he started getting physical.”
There’s a palpable shift in the room at that. Everyone, who’d already been tense, shifts. You feel Felix’s hands pause on your neck and Han’s hands freeze in your own. Chan who sat in front of you leans forward, hands clenched in tight fists. Minho’s lips have curved into a deep frown next to him. Changbin’s eyes have narrowed and you’ve never seen such a dark look on his face. Hyunjin’s leg is shaking rapidly, jaw tense. And Seungmin’s face remains neutral as usual, but he shifts in his seat like he’s ready to lunge at someone. Jeongin stands like he isn’t sure if he wants to hug you or go hunting for Seojun.
You bite your lip.
“He got smart as it continued. Started hiding the bruises where no one would see them. Then, he just stopped letting me leave the house altogether.” Your eyes water then, flashes of everything you’d endured the past four years rushing over you. “He told me o-omegas were just things for alphas to use, that I-I wasn’t a person. He’d force me to… have sex with him whenever and wherever he wanted, regardless of the fact that I didn’t want it.
“He’d hold me in place, fingers digging welts into my arms, slamming into me relentlessly… It hurt so bad all the time. But he never stopped.” Inhaling sharply, you fight back the sob that threatens to fall from your lips. “The worst were during my heats. It didn’t matter how much I begged, he didn’t care about helping me, just making sure he left satisfied. I’d spend days that felt like weeks in that basement, on the cold concrete ground, crying for someone to just hold me.”
You pick your head up then, teary-eyed, sniffling, and glance at your pack.
“He came home drunk one day. He was always drunk, but it was worse that day. That's when he tried to mark me... I pushed him off me, knocked him out and I just… ran,” you shrug, as if it was that simple. As if any of these was just so simple. “I ran and didn’t look back. I’m sure when Seojun finally woke up, he was furious. He’s… he’s probably looking for me too. There’s no way he wouldn’t be.”
Meeting Chan’s eyes, you hesitate; “I don’t know what he’ll do when he finds me.”
“He’ll never find you,” Chan says, not an ounce of hesitation in his voice. “And if he does, he won’t touch you ever again. That I can guarantee.”
“Absolutely,” Minho nods from beside him, sitting forward. “You have your real fated soulmates, now, Y/N. We’ll keep you safe.”
You never knew how much you needed to hear those words. Or how much you needed to get that off your chest. You’re tearing up and your heart is pounding but there’s also a weight that’s been lifted off your shoulders.
“I know,” you whisper, “I trust you all.”
Han is wrapping his arms around you, pulling you into his arms and Felix is leaning into the hug, wanting to comfort you just as much. You let them, enjoying the feeling of being smothered in their arms.
“Can I ask you a question?” Seungmin says, voice gentle.
Turning to the beta, you nod; “of course.”
“You said you lived alone,” he frowns, brows furrowed. “Where were your parents?”
You wring your hands together. You haven’t talked about that in a long time. Haven’t allowed yourself to think about it either. It hurt too much, and on top of how much everything else hurt, you couldn’t bear the burden of any additional pain.
But you owed them an explanation.
“My mom died when I was fifteen,” you say. “I never knew my dad. It was just me and my mom, and when she died, my grandparents were given legal guardianship over me. Only, they didn’t want to take care of me. Thought I was a burden and didn’t understand why a fifteen year old would still need someone to take care of them. So, they rented me this small apartment. When I was settled, I started working to help pay for it myself.”
There’s a brief moment of stunned silence.
Seungmin’s face twists; “oh.”
You nod.
The silence is thick. It swallows you whole. Han continues to hold you and Felix continues to run his fingers through your hair, but the silence is still stifling. It’s too much. You’re embarrassed, humiliated, at having been so vulnerable. At having bared everything to these eight men. These eight men you trusted and so desperately didn’t want to break your trust.
You… You don’t think you could handle that.
And then, finally, someone moves. It’s Chan. Of course it’s Chan. Strong, reliable, leader Chan. He moves until he’s crouched right before you, on his knees, slow and careful and submitting to you. His movements are careful, not touching until you give him permission to and then he rests his hand on your thigh; strong, reliable, warm.
“You’ve been through so much,” he starts, gentle, firm. “You’ve had to be so strong for so long, all on your own.” He pauses, breath inhaling a little too quick, a little too sharp, enough to tell you that he’s not okay. That he’s struggling just as much as you are.
They all are.
Because Han’s squeezing just a little too tight, as if afraid that you’ll be ripped from his hands if he doesn’t hold on tight enough. Felix’s fingers tremble over your skin, giving way to nerves. Seungmin’s face has settled into a deep frown, Minho’s jaw hasn't been unclenched once, Changbin’s fists are so tightly clenched his knuckles are white, Jeongin looks like he might cry and Hyunjin’s leg shakes like he’s ready to pounce in seconds.
“You don’t have to be strong anymore.”
Turning back to Chan, your lips part.
“We’ll take care of you, all of us,” he whispers, “you’ll never be alone again.”
The dam breaks then.
It happens suddenly, uncontrollably. Chan’s words reach a part of you that’s been desperate for love for so long. A part of you that thought would never feel loved again. It’s such an unexplainable feeling. His words touch you, the actions of the boys reach you, and then you’re sobbing, uncontrollably, loudly.
Everyone surrounds you then, pulling you close. Chan presses a kiss to your forehead, Changbin is brushing your hair out of your face. Han and Felix’s arms lock around you. Hyunjin is caressing the back of your head and Jeongin is rubbing your back. Minho wipes your tears and Seungmin hovers close, eyes watching carefully.
It’s not overwhelming.
It’s perfect.
“They’d cried themselves to sleep.”
Although the words come out with teasing intentions, Seungmin’s voice is fond as he stares down at the four of you.
After many more tears and many more reassurances, eventually you, Felix, Han and Jeongin had fallen asleep. In a mix of tears and cuddling and holding each other close, the four of you had fallen asleep in the communal nest in the living room. You were happily smothered in the middle, Han and Felix on either side of you, holding you close, with Jeongin happily wrapped around the three of you.
“It’s adorable,” Changbin coos in turn, grinning down at the four of you. “Look at our little Innie protecting the omegas even in his sleep.”
“That’s because Innie is a fiercely protective alpha,” Hyunjin snorts, rolling his eyes warmly at the sight. “Can’t bear to be apart even for a moment.”
Minho hums lightly in agreement.
But Chan? Chan remains silent. His eyes watch the four of them carefully, but it’s clear his mind is elsewhere.
“Out with it then,” Minho sighs, eyeing the pack alpha. “I already know what you want to say.”
Chan turns to him. “Are you telling me you don’t feel the same then?” He asks, before shifting his gaze across the rest of the group. “That all of you aren’t feeling the same?”
“What?” Changbin huffs, “like I want to fight that bastard and kill him?”
Chan’s shoulders drop. “Yeah.”
“Of course we do,” Hyunjin says. “And I’m not even a meat-headed alpha like you three. But didn’t we say we’d focus on Y/N?”
“We did,” Minho affirms.
Chan stands at that, scoffing. “We know his name now.”
“I agree with Chan,” Seungmin says. The four turn to him with parted lips and wide eyes, not used to such conviction from the beta. One look at him and you could tell he was riled and that wasn’t a sight any of them were used to. “We can’t let the asshole get away with that. Besides, Y/N said it herself… he’s probably looking for her.”
“We can’t ever let him find her,” Hyunjin says. “It’d break her.”
“I’m not saying we don’t,” Minho obliges after a moment. “I’m not saying we ignore it. But we can’t let it consume us. Y/N needs us. Felix and Han too. I know they’re putting a brave face for Y/N, but Han has been visibly restless at night. I know Felix is the same even if he’s better at hiding it.”
“He hasn’t been coming to my room,” Hyunjin hums. “When I checked last night, he was wide awake, saying he needed to be there for Y/N in case.”
Changbin frowns. “He’s been off with me too,” he agrees. “Both of them.”
“Innie too,” Minho says, turning to Chan. “He’s still learning to control his instincts, Chan. We lose ourselves to the anger and we lose him too. You all remember what happened before.”
There’s visible discomfort at Minho’s words, though none of them can pretend like he isn’t right.
Chan turns to Seungmin, and they share a nod.
“You’re all right,” Chan nods. “I know this has been hard on everyone. Especially these four.” He stares down at the cuddle pile, smile soft and tender but eyes worried. “We’ll find him but be careful about it. Don’t let the need for revenge consume you.” He meets each of their eyes carefully. “The most important thing is giving Y/N the life she deserves.”
“I agree,” Seungmin nods, crossing his arms over his chest. “But if I see this Seojun, it’s on sight.”
And that cracks everybody's tension.
Minho smiles; “same for me.”
“Agreed,” Changbin nods.
“I’ll be violent if it’s for Y/N,” Hyunjin grins.
Chan laughs. “Perfect.”
“If you guys are finding this guy, I want in.”
The five pause, turning to Jeongin who is now sitting up, an arm still draped across the three omegas but glancing up at the five determined.
“Innie,” Hyunjin calls, brows furrowed. “When the hell did you wake up?”
“I’ve heard you guys this whole time,” Jeongin rolls his eyes. “You guys aren’t quiet. But that doesn’t matter. What matters is that you guys stop acting like one bad thing is gonna make me lose control.”
Chan sighs; “Innie—”
“No, Chan,” Jeongin cuts in, voice sharp, surprising everyone. It was rare for anyone to stand up to Chan like that, especially Jeongin who idolized him. “I’m not a child. You don’t all have to act like I’ll lose it with every small thing. This is Y/N we’re talking about. I want to protect her. I will.”
Minho, Changbin, Hyunjin and Seungmin turn to Chan and the look on their faces is clear.
“I mean, the last few days, Jeongin has been more sensible than you,” Seungmin recalls, arching a brow.
Summary: They've been looking for the final member of their pack for years, a ache that never fades and always exists. Only, when they finally find you, they find a version of you that has been broken. Will they be able to make you whole again?
The second Felix leaves your room, he makes his way straight to Minho’s room. No one stops him, even though Han sends him a worried glance. Felix is the only one who doesn’t know what happened at the Doctor’s.
He deserves to know.
Minho is already waiting for him the second he steps into his room.
“Lixie.”
Felix inhales sharply. He’d been careful not to let his agitation show through to you, not wanting you to think it was you who he was upset with. But now, it was hard for Felix to ignore the race of his heart and the anxiety coursing through him at being the only one not aware of what was wrong.
“Lixie,” Minho calls again, “maybe you should—”
“Just tell me,” Felix huffs, feeling entirely not like himself. He would never normally snap, especially not at his own mate like this. But he’s sick with worry.
“I will,” Minho says and to his credit, he’s calm. He doesn’t react to Felix’s lashing out and he’s kind enough not to make Felix feel bad for it either. “Once you sit down.”
Knowing Minho’s right, even in the haze of his own worry, Felix inhales sharply, nodding to himself before moving over to Minho’s bed and taking a seat. He clasps his hands in his lap, if anything to stop himself from rubbing holes into his pants.
“Lix,” Minho starts, slow and careful. “Firstly, I’m sorry I made you wait to find out. It wasn’t my intention to single you out, I just didn’t want to worry Y/N.”
Letting out a shaky breath, Felix nods. “I know. And I’m not mad you did,” he assures Minho, meeting the older man's eyes. “It’s just… I’m so worried about her.”
“I know, baby,” Minho nods sympathetically. “Here. Let me tell you…”
And so Minho does. He goes through everything, from the beginning of the visit, all the way to when the four of you had made it back home. Felix sits there, listening and taking everything, and when Minho finally finishes, all he can manage is a shaky exhale.
“Lix?”
His eyes are watering before he can stop himself. He hates getting emotional like this, but his heart literally breaks at the thought of what you’ve suffered. Felix was already an emotional omega, but it was stronger when it came to his fated soulmates; the ones he loved. He just cared so much he never wanted them to be in any pain.
Hearing all you’ve suffered, and that was only what they knew from the visit — they didn’t know everything. Oh god—
“Felix!”
He feels hands wrap around him and his head falls against a chest. Felix blinks, not even realizing he’d been so lost in his own thoughts. There are tears streaming down his cheeks and his body is trembling.
Shit.
Swallowing thickly, Felix lets his arms wrap around Minho in return. The alpha stills in his grip.
“Baby?”
“I’m sorry,” he mumbles, his head still foggy from the rush of emotions he’d felt. “I just… I just wish there was more we could do to help her.”
Shifting, Minho moves to cup Felix’s cheeks, pulling the boy's gaze on his own.
“You are helping her, Lixie,” Minho says, “you’re helping her heal. That isn’t nothing.”
Gripping the sleeves of Minho’s shirt, Felix sniffles. “It doesn’t make what happened go away.”
“No,” Minho agrees, shaking his head. “But it makes it easier.”
Felix nods. “You think she’s happier here, hyung?”
“I do,” Minho hums, caressing the boy's cheeks and pressing a gentle kiss against his forehead. “And we’ll do everything to ensure it stays that way.
You figure the best person to start with is Seungmin.
After he’d helped you last night, he’s naturally the first one that pops into your mind. You make the decision you’ll start with him the second Chan leads you out of your room for dinner, and tell yourself you’ll figure out the rest later.
After dinner had been spent in nervous excitement with you practically unable to keep still, you were more than ready to ask the boys to scent some items for you. The boys had watched on with fond amusement and some confusion, given that only Chan, Han and Felix were aware of why you were so restless in your seat.
The second everyone’s done and Minho assures you that he doesn’t need your help with the dishes, you turn to Chan, looking eager. Chan just smiles and nods his head, and then you’re up and out of your seat, making your way up the stairs and towards your bedroom.
“What’s got her so excited?” Minho asks, having paused in cleaning up to watch you. There’s a slight furrow to his brows, but the soft small smile on his lips is clear as day.
Chan turns to Han and Felix, the three sharing knowing smiles.
“You’ll see.”
And now, fifteen minutes later, you’re standing outside Seungmin’s door, clutching a puppy-themed blanket. The second you’d caught sight of it in the midst of your pile of nesting materials, you’d known that it was the one for Seungmin. You’d snatched it up in your hands, smiling softly to yourself, before heading right for his door.
Only, now that you’re standing in front of it, your nerves have returned and you find it hard to actually knock on his door.
Chan had assured you the boys wouldn’t mind. Han and Felix too. And you really wanted to try your attempt at making your own nest.
Inhaling sharply, you let your eyes fall shut for a moment, taking that brief time to calm yourself. There was no reason to be afraid. Worse case, he said no. You’d be disappointed, but it’s not like he’d be mad or upset with you. Seungmin wouldn’t do anything he would’ve done.
These were your soulmates. You wanted to have faith in them.
A minute passes before you finally gain the courage to knock. With shaking hands, you slowly raise your fist, letting it rap against the door three times before pulling it back to your chest. The blanket in your hands is gripped with an iron fist, knuckles white.
Seungmin opens the door in ten seconds flat.
He seems mildly surprised to see you, his eyes widening a fraction as he meets your gaze.
And, if you were being honest with yourself, you’d admit that you’d thought about what you would say all dinner. While everyone else had mindlessly chatted with each other, you’d sat there and rehearsed what you’d say to each person. Each one was different because they were different and this meant a lot to you.
The boys just thought it was because you were still nervous around them. Part of it was because of that, but mainly, you were going through lines in your head like you were practicing for a play.
Only, now, stood in front of Seungmin, all of that goes out the window.
Your body moves on its own, thrusting the puppy-themed blanket right at his chest and blurting out; “would you please scent this blanket for me?”
You’d intended to ask Seungmin a bit more softer than that. Smooth yourself into it.
Stunned silence follows.
You feel your cheeks heat up, your eyes squinting shut as a flush crawls down your entire body. You’re seconds away from turning and sprinting right back to your bedroom when Seungmin very gently takes the blanket from your hands.
Your eyes fall on him, lips parted, as he pulls the blanket to his cheeks with a soft smile.
And so he scents it. Like the other three, he meets your gaze the entire time (these boys clearly like to fluster you) but there’s a certain softness to which Seungmin does it that the other three hadn’t displayed. The smile on his lips is small but tender and he’s looking at you like you’re the moon and the stars.
When he’s finished, he hands it back to you. “I like the puppy theme.”
You bite your lip, feeling your heart flutter. Seungmin’s scent smells like earl grey tea and clean linen. Refreshing and stabilizing. You breathe it in, holding the blanket close.
“Thank you,” you whisper, voice barely a breath.
Leaning against the frame of his door, Seungmin tilts his head; “is that why you were so restless during dinner?”
You nod; “Chan told me you guys wouldn’t mind scenting some blankets for me.”
“Of course we don’t,” Seungmin assures, nodding. The expression on his face is blunt but his tone remains gentle. “I’m sure the alphas in particular will be overjoyed.”
“You think?”
“Oh,” Seungmin laughs, “I know.”
Your next choice is Hyunjin.
The second you spot the throw pillow with red and white flowers embroidered on it, something in your mind tells you that it would fit Hyunjin. You grab it with a grin, excited for the beta to see what you’d chosen for him.
Not to mention, you still haven’t thanked him for cleaning and bandaging your wound yesterday.
“You want me to scent that for you?”
Hyunjin’s eyes are wide as he asks, holding the pillow in his hands so delicately it’s as if he’s afraid it’ll break with one wrong movement.
“If you don’t mind,” you nod, biting your lip. You fiddle with your hands, not sure what to do with them. “I’m trying to make my nest.”
Hyunjin meets your gaze. “And you want my scent for it?”
“I do,” you nod.
“Oh,” he breathes, breath shuddering.
You’re not sure what to say. You didn’t expect such a reaction. He seemed so… honoured that you were asking him. But wasn’t that what omegas did with their mates? You knew that Han and Felix have asked Hyunjin in the past, so you’re not sure why it’s so surprising that you’d ask him too.
“Thank you for trusting me with this,” Hyunjin tells you and it clicks then. All of the bits had seemed shocked at you asking, even if just for a short minute. They must’ve thought you wouldn’t want them to…
The thought makes you frown.
“I know it must be hard for you to trust us,” Hyunjin continues, taking your frown as a negative response. Your eyes widen, glancing up at him. “I promise I won’t break your trust.”
Hands falling by your sides, you stare back at Hyunjin. The beta was so sensitive to your feelings, you want him to know how much that means to you. “Thank you,” you smile, voice sincere; “I know you won’t.”
Hyunjin scents the pillow similarly to Chan. He starts with his wrists and then his cheeks before finishing against his neck. He’s thorough, slower than Chan and careful, as if he wants to make sure the entire pillow is entirely covered in his scent.
And when he finally hands it back to you, there’s a wide grin on his face.
“Make sure to hold it close to you tonight.”
You flush lightly at that, holding the pillow and nodding with a shy smile. Hyunjin smells like bergamot and white floral, which is why the embroidered pillow felt so right. “I will,” you promise, “I’ll treasure this.”
“And if you want me to scent more items, please don’t feel afraid to ask.”
“I probably will,” you say honestly, knowing that like Han and Felix had said, your omega will want your nest to be surrounded by your pack's scents. This was a good start, but it wouldn’t be enough forever.
Hyunjin grins; “Lixie is always coming in and stealing my blankets while Hannie likes to steal my clothes. Whatever you want, it’s yours.”
“Thank you,” you say again, “and I also want to say thank you for yesterday.”
Your hand reaches for your neck, touching the bandaged wound with a small, bittersweet smile.
Hyunjin shakes his head; “it was Doctor Yoon who really helped you. I wish I could’ve done more.”
Reaching for Hyunjin, you take his hand in yours. “That’s not true,” you frown, hating that he thinks so lowly of himself. “You took care of me. Even though you barely knew me, even though I was scared. That matters more than you know.”
Hyunjin squeezes your hand in return. “Well I’m glad it helped,” he says, a light flush dancing across his cheeks. “I hated seeing you so hurt.”
The two of you glance at each other a moment longer, before Hyunjin pulls away, allowing you to step back and head out of his room. “I still have to ask Minho, Jeongin and Changbin,” you explain, glancing at him over your shoulder as you make your way out of his room. “But I’m—”
“What do you have to ask me?”
Pausing in your step, you glance to your left, wide eyes falling on Changbin. There’s a grin on his face as he stops beside you, glancing at you then Hyunjin, before finally settling on you with a curious glance.
“Y/Nnie is asking the pack to scent some nesting items for her,” Hyunjin explains, before grinning mischievously. “And she asked me before you.”
Lips parting, Changbin presses a head against his chest. “Hyunjin?” He gasps, loud and echoing off the walls. “Before me?”
You swallow thickly, glancing between the two nervously, clutching onto the pillow tightly. “I-I didn’t mean to hurt your feelings or—”
“He’s just joking, Y/Nnie,” Hyunjin assures you, setting a hand on your shoulder and squeezing it. Then, he turns back to the alpha, frowning. “Try not to upset our omega her second day here, Binnie.”
Changbin flushes. “Sorry, princess,” he rubs the back of his neck. “I was just kidding around. I thought it’d make you laugh…”
“Oh,” you say, embarrassed. “My bad.”
Changbin shakes his head. “No, it’s my bad,” he brushes your worry away. “Now, what’s this about scenting?”
You turn to Hyunjin, the beta giving you a reassuring nod. You breathe in sharply, turning back to Changbin. This would be your first time asking one of the alphas, except for Chan, but that had been a different circumstance. This feels a lot more nervewracking than asking the omegas or betas.
“Would you scent something for me, Changbin?”
Your voice is small as you ask, head turned down as your chest flutters with nerves. You try to remind yourself that there’s no way Changbin would get mad or upset with you, but it’s hard to fight back your nerves.
Though, it’s clear there was never any reason to be. Changbin’s reaction is immediate and loud but also very abundantly pleased;
“I’d love to, princess!”
You jump softly at the spike in volume, turning to him with bewildered eyes and parted lips. Changbin, oblivious to your reaction, continues to grin widely at you, smiling ear to ear.
“To think, our omega wants my scent in her nest,” he exclaims, “oh, I could cry.”
“Calm down, casa-nova,” Hyunjin rolls his eyes. “She’s asking all the pack members.”
Changbin ignores him. “My scent!”
Hyunjin just scoffs.
“What’s with all the noise?” Minho asks, pulling the door to his bedroom open. His eyes fall on Changbin first, eyes narrowing, before finding you.
His gaze softens immediately.
“Y/N/N’s asking us to scent things for her,” Changbin explains, turning to Minho. “She just asked for my scent!”
You continue to watch, bewildered.
“Don’t mind him,” Hyunjin mumbles to you, his hand still on your shoulder. “He’s always this loud.”
Changbin just sticks his tongue out at him.
“This for your nest, kitten?” Minho asks, ignoring everything Changbin had just said and focusing on you.
These boys were really going to kill you with these pet names.
“It is,” you confirm.
“Ah,” Minho smirks, “now I know why you were so jittery during dinner.”
You don’t think your cheeks could get any hotter.
It takes a few moments, but eventually, you lead the two alphas towards your bedroom. You’d have to find the right item for them, you explained, and so the two decide to just follow you to your bedroom after making sure it’s alright with you.
You choose a blanket for Changbin, pink and soft and a pillow for Minho with cute little cat designs all over it. As per usual, they consider it an intimate moment, both of them staring at you closely as they scent the items.
Minho’s cedarwood and linen mixes well with Changbin’s leather scent, and you’re almost completely satisfied.
“Who’s left?” Minho asks, noticing the expression on your face.
“Jeongin,” you answer, eyeing the items on your bed.
“Ah, baby alpha,” Changbin grins.
You turn to him, brows furrowed.
“It’s what we call him,” Changbin explains. “He’s the youngest… or well, was, of us all. But he’s still the youngest alpha. He doesn't have a lot of experience so he’s learning a lot of things about what it means to be an alpha so the name just stuck.”
Minho nods; “he looks up to Chan in particular. I swear, that boy is like a mini him.”
Your face softens at that; “that’s adorable.”
“It is, isn’t it?” Changbin grins.
“That must’ve been why he felt different,” you ponder, not realizing you’d said it out loud.
Minho’s brows furrow; “what do you mean?”
“Oh,” you blink, turning to them. “It’s just… When I first came, I was afraid. Especially of the alphas… I know now that you all would do nothing to hurt me, but I couldn’t help it. Your scents were the strongest and your voices often the loudest and most commanding. Jeongin hadn’t stood out as much.”
Minho and Changbin glance at each other.
“Not that that’s a bad thing,” you rush to explain, realizing how that sounded. “Actually, it was a good thing. He felt more… soothing to me at first.” Then, your eyes widen. “Not that you guys aren’t, it’s just—”
“It’s okay, kitten,” Minho cuts in gently, smiling at you. “We understand.”
“You don’t have to explain yourself,” Changbin adds.
Shoulders easing, you nod.
“You should go ask Jeongin,” Minho suggests gently. “I’m sure he’ll be thrilled to scent something for you.”
“Jeongin?”
The alpha all but scrambles to his feet the second he hears your voice, nearly knocking over the glass of water sitting at his desk. He catches it at the last second, a chorus of swears leaving his lips as his cheeks flush a deep red.
Then, finally, he meets your gaze.
“Hi,” he breathes, smiling embarrassedly.
You mimic his smile, though softer. “Hi Jeongin.”
Stepping away from his desk, Jeongin brushes his hair out of his face. “You can call me Innie,” he says, “it’s what most of the others call me.”
“Oh,” you pause, lips parting as you nod. “O-Okay, sounds good, Innie.”
He lets out a soft laugh at that, cheeks still red. “What’s up?”
“Oh!” You blink, suddenly remembering why you’re there. Stepping towards him, you swallow the lump in your throat, handing the blue fuzzy blanket to him. “I wanted to ask if you’d scent this for me.”
Jeongin’s eyes widen, glancing down at the blanket with parted lips before slowly taking it from your hands. “You want me to scent something?”
You nod; “if you don’t mind.”
There’s a brief moment of silence then Jeongin is glancing up at you with a wide grin; “I’d love to.”
Jeongin smells like apples. Sweet and innocent.
The second he hands the blanket back to you, a sense of relief flushes through you. It feels complete now, like you finally have all the missing pieces you’ve been searching for in order to make this nest. You’re already thinking about how you want the nest to look and feel just standing there.
It makes you beam.
“Did that help?”
“It did,” you grin at Jeongin. “Thank you so much, Innie.”
“Of course,” he laughs, “I’d love to scent something for you any time.”
“Your scent is so calming,” you compliment, breathing it in again. Normally you wouldn’t be so forward, but the rush of all of your packs scents so close was making you feel a little dazed. And sleepy.
“I love it.”
That makes Jeongin pause, eyes widening. “Oh, really?”
“Really.”
“I’m… I’m glad,” he says, obviously flustered by your comment. It’s quite cute.
“It was the second I met you,” you say, remembering Changbin and Minho’s words from earlier. You wanted to assure Jeongin that just because he maybe didn’t know as much about being an alpha didn’t mean he was any less to you. In fact, you understood what it felt like to not know everything about your sub-gender. “I just wanted you to know that.”
Jeongin’s face softens; “you have no idea how happy that makes me.”
Hugging the blanket closer, you smile back at him, eyes lidded and at complete peace for the first time in a long time.
“Is she asleep?”
“Soundly,” Chan smiles, turning back to Minho. “All bundled up in her nest.”
“Good,” Minho nods, peering over Chan’s shoulder at you. The pack alpha had quietly opened your door just a minute ago, wanting to make sure you were okay. He was met with the adorable sight of you peacefully sleeping in your newly made nest, looking more content than he’d ever seen you.
It warmed his heart.
“The others were raving about her asking them earlier,” Minho laughs the second Chan shuts the door, careful to stay quiet. “That was a huge step for her.”
Chan nods, “it’s a good sign. It means she’s opening up and trusting us.”
“Definitely,” Minho agrees. “As long as we keep reassuring her that she can, I think over time she’ll settle.”
“Especially now that she’s away from whoever it was that hurt her,” Chan says, unable to stop the twist in his face. He hates even thinking about whoever hurt you. “We’ll never let him touch her again.”
Minho sets his hand on Chan’s shoulder, face serious. “Of course, Chan.”
The camera flicked on with a soft click, the ring light warming up to cast its glow across the bed. Chan adjusted the angle with one hand. he had you on his lap, his thumb swiping over the screen of his phone where the livestream preview played. His other hand rested casually on your thigh, "You ready? Last chance to bail."
You could already see the chat scrolling on his monitor, usernames and emojis blurring together, but his focus stayed on you, waiting. The heat of his palm against your leg was steadying, somehow, even as your pulse jumped at the thought of what came next. "I’m ready," you said, quieter than you meant to, and Chan’s grin sharpened.
"Atta girl," he murmured, pressing a soft kiss to your temple before his thumb tapped the 'live' button, and the stream interface blinked red— a silent confirmation that thousands had just flooded in.
His voice dropped into that low, performative rasp you knew so well, the one that made chat lose their minds.
"Alright, degenerates, we've got something special tonight," he said, fingertips skating up your thigh as the camera panned to frame your body, just the curve of your waist, the dip of your hips, nothing identifiable. "Our lovely guest agreed to help me demonstrate a little…technique."
You flinched when his palm pressed flat against your stomach, holding you still. "Relax," he murmured, just for you, before raising his voice for the audience.
"See how tense she is? That's normal. First time jitters, right, kitten?" His other hand ghosted up your inner thigh, teasing, "Gonna take it slow, pay attention."
comments and donations pinged.
squirtlord: bro shes so pretty wtf
lixonfire: chan u lucky bastard
Chan laughed, breath warm against your ear as he leaned in to read them aloud. "They're obsessed with you already," he whispered, nipping your lobe before addressing the stream again.
"Alright, number one: how to tell she's ready." His fingers trailed lower, feather light, tracing patterns that made your breath hitch. "See how she’s arching into my hand? That’s your green light. don't rush — unless she asks for it."
You gasped when his thumb circled where you were hottest, the fabric of your underwear still frustratingly in place. "Chan—" His name slipped out before you could stop it, and the chat lost it entirely, hearts and dollar signs flooding the screen.
"Yeah? ," he coaxed, dragging his knuckles against you just hard enough to make your hips jerk.
His fingers curled under the edge of your underwear, not pulling them aside yet— just teasing the promise of it, letting the tension coil tighter in your stomach.
cumdump404: chan pls tell her she’s perfect*.
“See that?” His thumb stroked slow circles just above where you ached. “They’re begging for you.”
You whimpered when he finally hooked a finger under the fabric, dragging it to the side slowly. The cool air of the room hit your skin, making you shiver — or maybe that was the way his breath hitched when he got his first proper look.
“Fuck,” he exhaled, low, “That’s what you want to see before you even think about touching.”
he dragged the pad of his thumb through the slick heat between your thighs. "shit," he muttered, more to himself than the stream, before angling his wrist to give the camera a better view. The wet glide of his skin against yours was obscenely loud in the quiet room, punctuated only by the occasional ping of another donation notification.
You bit down hard on your lip, hips twitching when his fingertip circled your entrance without pushing in. You could see the corner of his mouth tilt up as he watched you squirm. "Patience, kitten," he chided, though his own breathing wasn’t entirely steady.
"Gotta make sure you're fully ready f'me," he said, dragging his finger down to collect more wetness before bringing it back up to swirl around your clit.
His fingertips trailed back down, skirting your heat deliberately, and you whimpered when he paused just shy of touching you properly. “Chat, tell me — how many of you would’ve just shoved two fingers in by now?”
jinnieinabottle: guilty
quokktoobig: BOOOO
Chan shook his head, clicking his tongue. “Amateurs. Watch.” His index finger finally dipped between your folds, dragging through slickness in one slow, filthy stroke.
Your breath hitched when his fingertip finally pressed inside— just the tip, just enough to make your hips jerk forward instinctively. "Easy," Chan murmured, his free hand splayed across your stomach to hold you still. The stretch burned sweetly, his finger working in achingly slow increments. "See how she’s taking me?" He angled his wrist to give the camera a better view, the wet shine of your arousal glistening under the ring light. "Tight, but not tense. That’s the difference."
Chan's finger curled inside you experimentally, the pad of it dragging against your walls with a practiced laziness that made your toes curl. Then— there. The sudden pressure against that one spot sent a jolt up your spine, your back arching off his lap and an embarrassingly loud moan spilled from your lips.
His grin was instant, sharp with triumph even as his voice dropped into that faux sympathetic tone "Oh? Was that it?" he teased, circling the spot again just to watch your thighs tremble. "You can say it, baby. We’re all friends here."
"Y-yes," you gasped, the word fracturing as Chan's finger crooked inside you again, relentless in its precision.
Chan only hummed, low and approving, his breath warm against your ear. "Good girl," he murmured, the praise curling around you like smoke. "Now tell them where." His fingertip pressed harder, deliberate, and your hips stuttered against his hand. "Right—right there, fuck—"
The stream's audio picked up your sharp inhale as Chan crooked his finger just right again, “Watch the angle,” Chan instructed to the stream twisting his wrist to demonstrate. “You’re not finger fucking a thanksgiving turkey.”
His free hand slid up to palm your breast through your shirt, thumb rolling over your nipple. “And always, always keep the rest of her involved.”
slave4u: me next me next
quokktoobig: bro she’s literally shaking
The stretch burned brighter when his second finger pressed alongside the first, his palm tilting to ease the way. You gasped, fingers twisting in the sheets, but Chan’s free hand caught yours, lacing your fingers together as he squeezed reassurance. "Breathe," he murmured, just for you, before shifting back into instructor mode for the stream.
"See how she’s opening up for me? That’s the rhythm you want— press in on her exhale." His fingers retreated slightly, then pushed back in deeper, the drag of his knuckles against your walls drawing a shaky moan from your throat.
"thereee you go," he praised, thumb circling your clit, the dual stimulation had your hips rocking helplessly, but his grip on your hand tightened, holding you still. "None of that," he chided, though his voice was warm with amusement. "Let me do the work. yea?" His fingers curled again.
"That’s the motion— come here, chat, look close." He angled the camera down, his fingers glistening as they moved inside you.
“You wanna speed up?” he asked you, and the sincerity in his voice— like he’d stop if you said no. he would.
"yes— hnnng —please don't stop," you managed, the words catching in your throat as his fingers twisted deeper. He turned back to the camera. "Hear that, chat? Consent is always sexy." His fingers sped up,
Another donation alert chimed
lixonfire: TELL HER SHE'S PRETTY WHEN SHE CUMS
Chan laughed breathlessly. "Oh, she knows," he said, but his thumb rolled over your clit with renewed focus, The coil in your stomach tightened, your muscles fluttering around his fingers, and his breath hitched. "There it is," he breathed, "That's it, let go. I've got you."
and it's like you came on command, your back arching off his chest as pleasure crackled through your nerves.
Chan's fingers slowed, gentling you through it, his praise a warm murmur under the chaos of the chat. "Fuck, look at her," he told the stream, his voice rough with awe. "wait for her to ride it out, don't be greedy" His fingers slowed before stilling completely and slipping out of you with a soft, obscene sound, and you shuddered, oversensitive and boneless against him.
You twitched when his fingertips brushed your knee, oversensitive and still thrumming. Chan noticed, and his smirk softened into something warmer. "You good?" he murmured, leaning in close enough that his breath ghosted over your ear. The question was private, just for you, but the microphone caught it anyway,
cumdump404: i think he's in love with her
You nodded, swallowing hard, and Chan’s grin turned wicked again as he straightened. "She says she’s good," he announced to the stream, winking at the camera.
"And that," Chan announced, dragging his damp fingers across your thigh one last time for the camera's benefit, "is today's lesson." he pulled your now soaked panties back on you and gave it a little pat.
"Say goodbye, chat. Our star needs a break." His palm settled warm against your stomach as he nudged you gently. "Wave bye, kitten."
You lifted a trembling hand toward the camera, fingers fluttering in a weak approximation of a wave.
slave4u: pls bring her back next stream
jinnieinabottle: bye angel
quokktoobig: I just came so hard rn
lixonfire: holy shit that was so hot
Chan's laugh was low and pleased as he leaned into frame, his free hand adjusting the camera angle to capture the both of you— his face, smug and satisfied, and your body still loose limbed with pleasure. "Next time, maybe we'll teach you how to make her beg," he mused, winking at the lens before tapping the screen to end the stream.
who knew that watching your best friend get this much bigger would make the "just friends" lie feel so dangerously thin ?
pairing: bang chan x reader, friends to lovers
genre: smut; fluff
warnings: explicit sexual content (minors do not interact), fingering, unprotected sex (please use contraceptives !), praise kink, size kink
word count: 3.55k
kysa's note: had this freaky title in my wips and it's finally here, drowning in praise (#lovepraisekink) hopefully it's as good as i had hoped to make it :) leave your thoughts in the comments, hope you enjoy ! xoxo.
you loved hanging out with your boys, you seriously did. you had met chan and jeongin in university three years ago — a tiny, tight-knit circle whose lives had become tangled in a way that could only be fated. out of everyone you’d met during those years, they were the ones who stuck. you loved them.
okay maybe someone a tad bit more.
bang christopher chan.
you had met him through shared music production classes back when you were all just trying to survive your first year. the first proper meeting between you all had happened while you and jeongin were drowning in a final project; chan had simply dropped by with coffee and some words of encouragement. you learned quickly that that was just how chan was — kind, caring and the literal definition of a gentleman.
he had kept that reputation up for years, whether he was picking you up from the library when you were too tired to walk or showing up at your door with food when you were drowning in assignments, detached from the world. before you knew it, he had nestled into a permanent, sweet corner of your heart. your crush on him kept growing but you reminded yourself that it's just chan — being kind and caring and him.
you controlled yourself, or rather, you feigned whatever remnants of control were left in your body. you feigned it so well that apparently jeongin knew, but the man in question remained oblivious. it was easy to hide because you believed that was just chan — the hardworking soul who cared for his two best friends with the same steady, protective warmth.
so all was good. you continued with the act.
because that’s what it was — an act. for years, you had lied, playing the part of the perfect friend, pretending his presence didn't make your pulse skip.
and that lie was currently biting you in the ass.
you were calm.
obviously.
most definitely.
it wasn't like the visuals were currently playing tug-of-war with your heartbeat.
it was your typical movie night, hosted at chan and jeongin’s place. jeongin had asked you to come early to help with snacks since chan was out at the gym. you had arrived with bags of groceries, helping him prep while he chattered away about the horror movie he had picked. while he handled the popcorn, you filled the bowls with crisps. while he stepped away for a call, you placed the bowls on the table and settled on the sofa, mindlessly scrolling through your phone.
then, the door swung open.
chan entered, his body covered in a slight sheen of sweat, gym bag slung over his shoulder. clad in a black chrome hearts hoodie, he looked so devastatingly hot it had your mouth drying, your eyes straying to the sliver of skin visible at his chest and neck.
"hey, sorry i'm late to my own hosting duties," chan spoke, locking the door behind him. his voice was a bit deeper than usual, roughened by his workout, and it sent a localized shiver straight down your spine. "missed my session this morning so i had to squeeze it in now. you been waiting long ?"
"ah, don't worry about it — besides, innie is way more fun to be around anyways." you managed to joke, your voice only slightly higher than usual as you tried to hide your flustered state behind a playful jab.
chan just chuckled, a low, rumbling sound that felt far too intimate for the living room. "is that so ? i'll remember that next time you need a coffee run."
just then, jeongin appeared from the kitchen and plopped down on the floor right in front of you, leaning his back against the sofa near your knees. he was already rambling about the jump-scares in the movie. you reached out instinctively, ruffling his hair as he talked; he was essentially the younger brother you had never had. there was a comfortable, protective warmth between you two — a bond so effortless that he felt like home. he was the only one who could get away with forcing you to watch a horror movie you were terrified of just by giving you those puppy eyes.
"don't listen to him," jeongin chirped, looking up at you with a grin. "i'll protect you from the ghosts. chan hyung is the one who's going to be screaming."
"in your dreams, kid," chan muttered, heading toward the bathroom.
a few minutes later, you caught a waft of fresh, musk-scented shampoo. before the scent could even reach your lungs, a freshly showered chan sat on the couch right beside you. his fingers carded through his wet ash-blonde hair, the hue shining as if it existed only to be his hair colour. once you moved past that, you froze.
you sat there, way too still for a living, breathing human body.
chan was sitting beside you, clad in a black tank top that left absolutely nothing to the imagination.
the fabric barely contained the gym results he had been hiding under heavy hoodies for months. his arms were thick, the skin pulled tight over hard muscle, and every time he moved, his pecs flexed against the thin material of the tank. when he leaned forward to grab his drink, the sight of his back muscles shifting and roping beneath the black fabric was enough to make your brain short-circuit. even his thighs, thick and straining against the hem of his shorts as he settled into the cushions, seemed to take up more space than they used to.
the couch felt smaller. the air felt thinner.
when did he get so big ? his arms, his shoulders, his back — the thought looped in your head, a frantic, rhythmic mantra while you stared at the tv without seeing a single thing.
you could feel the heat radiating off him, a steady pulse of warmth that made your own skin feel too tight. every time he shifted, the scent of his soap mixed with the lingering warmth of his skin hit you, sending your internal monologue spiraling into territory that definitely wasn't 'just friends'. you were so focused on the sheer physical gravity of him that you missed the way his eyes lingered on the side of your face — his expression unreadable, heavy, and far too focused.
"you okay ?" he murmured, the low vibration of his voice closer to your ear than you were prepared for. "you're awfully quiet tonight."
"oh y-yea, it's n-nothing," you mumbled, mentally screaming at yourself for tripping over such simple words. you forced your eyes back to the screen, staring at the flickering shadows with a focus that was borderline painful.
but just as your heartbeat started to settle into a manageable rhythm, the movie decided it was finished being subtle. a sudden, bone-chilling screech echoed through the speakers, paired with a visual so jarring that your body reacted before your brain could catch up.
you flinched violently, your entire frame jolting sideways as you sought out the nearest solid thing to anchor you. your hands scrambled, fingers digging instinctively into the nearest source of heat — chan’s bicep.
you didn't just touch him — you clung to him, your face pressing into the crook of his shoulder as you tried to hide from the screen. his arm was hot beneath your touch, so much wider and stronger than you had imagined when you were just looking at it. the sheer density of his muscle under the thin cotton of the tank top made your breath hitch for an entirely different reason than the ghost on screen.
"shit," you breathed out against his skin, your heart hammering a frantic rhythm against your ribs. "i hate this. i seriously hate you both for making me do this."
jeongin let out a delighted cackle from his spot on the floor, not even looking back as he reached for a handful of popcorn. "don't pass out before the second act !"
chan didn't laugh. if anything, he seemed to go incredibly still. for a second, you worried you had overstepped, that the 'act' was finally broken. you started to pull back, your fingers beginning to loosen their desperate grip on his arm, but before you could retreat, his hand came up.
his large palm covered your own, his fingers curling over yours to lock your hand firmly against his bicep. he didn't let you pull away. instead, he shifted his weight, leaning into you until you were tucked securely against his side, practically swallowed by his bulk. the movement caused his tank top to strain even further, the fabric groaning against the width of his chest.
"it's okay," chan murmured, his voice dropping into a register so low it felt like a physical vibration against your temple. "i've got you. you don't have to let go."
i don't have to let go — the thought was a dizzying loop in your mind. you could feel the rhythmic rise and fall of his chest, the scent of his shampoo and warm skin wrapping around you like a cocoon. you felt so small next to him, so fragile, and the way he was looking down at you — gaze heavy and dark — made a tiny, involuntary whimper climb up your throat.
it was a pathetic, needy little sound, and you tried really hard to swallow it, but it was too late.
chan heard it.
he leaned in just an inch closer, his lips nearly brushing the shell of your ear as the movie’s soundtrack swelled to a roar, masking his words from jeongin.
"that's it, such a good girl, staying so still for me," he whispered, the praise hitting you like a physical weight. "just keep holding on, sweetheart. you're doing so well."
oh. fuck.
did he just — ? did he just call you, a good girl ?
your grip tightened on his arm, your knuckles turning white as you felt your act crumbling. the horror movie was still playing, but the only thing you could actually feel was the heat of chan’s body and the way his voice was slowly, deliberately dismantling every bit of control you had left.
the air in the room shifted, turning thick and heavy as the movie’s score reached a frantic, screeching crescendo. jeongin was still glued to the screen, completely oblivious to the silent collapse of your composure just inches away.
every time your heart tried to find its rhythm, chan’s thumb would brush slowly, deliberately, over the back of your hand — a rhythmic, possessive movement that kept you pinned to his side. you were leaning into him so heavily now that you could feel the individual ribs of his tank top pressing against your cheek, the heat of his skin radiating through the thin fabric like a fever.
suddenly, he dropped his hand from your shoulder to your waist, fingers grazing the skin where your shirt had lifted. despite much controlling, another whimper escaped you, a tiny, broken sound that was lost to everyone but him.
"you’re so sensitive, aren't you?" chan’s voice vibrated against the shell of your ear. "making those needy little noises just because i'm holding you."
jesus fucking christ —
"stop — please stop" your mind pleaded, but your body was betraying you, arching almost imperceptibly toward the source of the praise. your internal monologue was a chaotic mess of two years of pining finally crashing into the reality of his massive, solid frame.
you felt small. you felt seen. and for the first time, you felt like he was done pretending.
he leaned in, his nose brushing against your temple as he inhaled the scent of your hair.
"i think the movie is getting to be too much for you," he murmured, though his eyes weren't on the screen. "how about we go to my room ? i'll help you calm down."
the promise — the promise of help was what finally made you stop pretending. you couldn't even find your voice to answer. you just nodded — a jerky, frantic movement that had his lips curling into a shadow of a smirk.
chan stood up, his massive frame towering over you for a second before he reached down, his hand wrapping around yours and pulling you upward. the sheer strength in his grip was effortless, reminding you of his strength that had been distracting you all night.
"innie, we're gonna head in. she's a bit too spooked," chan called out, his voice perfectly casual, slipping back into that normal tone so easily it made your head spin.
jeongin didn't even look up from the screen, waving a dismissive hand. "yeah, yeah. go protect your person, hyung. don't let the ghosts get 'em."
the moment the bedroom door clicked shut behind you. the silence of the room was deafening, broken only by the sound of your own jagged breathing. chan didn't move toward the bed. instead, he turned, his bulk immediately crowding you back against the solid wood of the door.
he didn't touch you yet, but he didn't have to. he just stood there, his shoulders blocking out the light, the black tank top clinging to his chest as it rose and fell with a sudden, heavy intensity.
"now," he whispered, his voice dropping into that commanding register that made your knees go weak. "tell me why you were making those sounds on the couch ? why did those pretty whimpers escape your throat, baby ?
your mouth went dry, mind reeling as the words fell into your ears — he found your whimper pretty ? and the nickname — good god.
you looked up at him, the height difference feeling more pronounced than ever in the quiet of his room.
"i... i don't know," you breathed, another sound escaping as he stepped even closer, his thick thighs brushing against yours.
"liar," he coaxed, his hand coming up to cup your jaw, his thumb dragging across your lower lip. "you were being such a good girl out there, acting so sweet for me. do you want to keep being good ?"
your soul agreed before you could.
"b-big — y-you're so b-big, channie" you whispered, throat bobbing as you waited for his reaction with bated breath.
chan chuckled as his fingers slid back to tangle in your hair, tilting your head back until you had no choice but to take all of him in.
"is that what's distracting you, sweetheart ?" he murmured, stepping even deeper into your space until you were pinned flat against the door.
up close, the sheer scale of him was terrifying in the best way possible. his chest was a broad wall of solid muscle, the thin fabric of his tank top damp and clinging to every ridge of his torso.
"i've been working so hard for you," he whispered, his voice dropping an octave, becoming that chesty, gravelly tone that made your knees buckle. "waiting for the day you’d finally stop pretending and just tell me how much you liked it."
he worked out for you ?
the realisation hit you with a force, making your knees buckle.
his free hand came down, his large palm splaying over your stomach, his fingers spanning nearly the entire width of your waist. he pressed in just enough to make you gasp, his thumb grazing the bottom of your ribs.
"made my shoulders broad for you to lay on, made my biceps bigger for you to hold, made myself stronger so i can — " he continued, his voice trailing off into a low, dark growl as he pressed his hips firmly into yours.
the sentence didn't need to be finished. you could feel exactly what he meant as his eyes darkened, tracking the way your breath hitched the moment you felt the hard length of him through his shorts, pressing firmly against your thighs.
you could only let out a broken, high-pitched whimper, your hands coming up to rest uselessly against his massive biceps. they felt like iron beneath your palms, so thick that your fingers couldn't even dream of meeting on the other side. the realization of just how much bigger he was than you sent a fresh wave of heat straight to your core.
"channie, p-please — " you whispered, arching into him as you moved your hands to his chest, slightly digging in order to ground yourself.
the friction of your palms against his chest only made him growl, a low sound that vibrated through your own ribcage. he couldn't wait for you to finish your plea. with a single, effortless motion, he hooked his hands under your thighs and hiked you up, your back hitting the door with a soft thud as you instinctively wrapped your legs around his waist.
the sheer bulk of him was even more overwhelming now that you were flush against him. just then he pressed his lips against yours, groaning as you moaned into the kiss. a shiver ran down your spine as chan sucked on your lower lip, swallowing your tiny gasps. a slight nip on your lips had you moaning his name and all his restraints snapped.
chan laid you on the bed, the mattress divotting deeply under his weight as he crawled over you, caging you in with those massive shoulders. as the last of your clothes were discarded, the reality of him hit you like a physical blow.
god, he was big everywhere. your eyes blown wide, you tracked the lines of his body — the roped muscle of his thighs, the sheer width of his chest, and then, the sight of him fully hardened and twitching against his stomach. he was thick, heavy, and looked utterly impossible.
chan didn't give you time to overthink it. he was over you in a second, his large hand sliding down to find you already sopping wet, your body betraying how long you had craved this. he pushed two thick fingers inside you, stretching you open as he watched your face go slack, eyes rolling back.
"fuck, you’re so wet for me, sweetheart," he rasped, his voice a gravelly vibration. "did you get like this just thinking about me ? thinking about how much of me you could take ? fuck, you're so ready."
you arched off the bed, your fingers digging into the iron-hard muscle of his biceps. "please, c-chan — put it in. oh fuck — please, i need it so bad."
"you want it?" he growled, "show me how much you want it. tell me, princess."
"want you so fucking bad, i'm aching — please, channie — " you whimpered, spreading your legs wider giving him a perfect view of your sopping cunt stuffed full of his fingers. that was all the invitation he needed.
he repositioned himself, the broad head of his length probing at your entrance. he moved slowly, testing the tension, but as your own juices acted as a slick invitation, he could'nt help but slide in one heavy thrust.
the friction was staggering. you felt your breath leave your body in a silent scream as he slid in all at once, his sheer girth stretching you to the absolute limit. he didn't stop until his pelvis crashed against yours, buried to the hilt.
"oh god — fuuuuuuuck," he groaned, his forehead dropping against yours as he took a ragged breath. "you're so tight — nghhhh, you're wrapping around me like you were fucking made for me. such a good girl, taking all of me so perfectly. fuck — you feel heavenly, baby."
it felt like he was everywhere. the sensation was so deep it was visceral — you could swear you felt him pressing against your very ribs, filling the entirety of your core until there was no room left for air — breathing nothing but him. as you looked down, a visible, terrifyingly hot bulge appeared in the soft skin of your lower stomach, marking exactly where he was stretched inside you.
"look at that," he whispered, his eyes following yours to where his size was distorting your form, his thumb stroking your hip. "look at what you're holding for me. it's right in your tummy, isn't it ?
he didn't wait for a response before he started snapping his hips, his pace sudden and much fucking needed. every thrust was a heavy, wet thud, his balls slapping against you as he drove himself into you with the strength he’d spent years building.
"fuck — yea yea yea — just like that," you sobbed out, your head tossing back as he hit your sweet spot. "nghhhh, channie, right there — oh god, fuck !"
"yeah ? you like that ?" he growled, his hands sliding under your hips to tilt you up, making the penetration even deeper, even more ruinous. "fuck, you're taking every inch beautifully. you were always mine, hm ? you just had to be brave enough to let me in. so brave for me, sweetheart. good fucking girl — fuck, you're so tight."
you were a mess of whimpers and shattered breaths, your body shaking under the weight of his broad shoulders and the relentless stretch of him. the sound of wet friction and his heavy grunts filled the room, a filthy symphony of the three years of pining finally exploding.
"that’s it, give it all to me," he choked out, his voice breaking as he felt you begin to climax. "fuckfuckfuck — stay right there. let me fill you up until you can't feel anything but me. you did so well for me, sweetheart. oh god, fuck —"
he delivered one final, soul-crushing thrust, burying himself as deep as possible as he spilled into you as you both unravelled simultaneously. wrapped in his arms, swallowed by his bulk, you finally understood. the gentleman was gone, but the man who remained was exactly what you had always needed to be whole.
thinking about bf!jisung who’s such a whiny, desperate mess for you, he literally can’t shut the fuck up no matter what you do to him. whether you’re pressed into his lap or have him sprawled beneath you, his head tilted back against the pillow, all jisung knows how to do is beg— loud, needy, pathetic, like he’s never wanted anything more than your pussy wrapped snugly around his cock.
like now.
he’s trembling under you, his hands gripping tight at your waist as you hover over his lap, his fat tip rubbing up against your slick folds but never pushing in. his precum smears over your entrance, catching with every slow roll of your hips, every teasing move you make just to watch him squirm.
“fuck- fuck no, please, baby,” jisung stutters, his words falling apart as his hips buck up on their own, only for you to grab him and shove him back down. “stop- fuck, stop teasing me, c’mon, oh my god—”
he’s so messy, completely unraveling just from the way your warm, wet entrance flutters each time you let him feel you drag along his cock. big hands dig into your hips, his knuckles white as his voice wavers again. “i’ll do anything- please just sit on it, please- need you so bad—”
and when you catch his face in one hand, squishing his flushed cheeks together before leaning down to spit into his open, trembling mouth? he nearly loses his fucking mind.
his cock twitches violently as his jaw falls open wider, his whole body jolting like a shock’s just been sent through him. “holy fuck,” he pants shakily as you smirk, your thumb brushing over the sheen of spit on his lips. “oh fuck, m gonna fuckin’ cum if you- shit, you gotta—”
“pathetic,” you hum sweetly, grinding yourself just a little harder onto his lap. “you gonna cum just from me teasing you, sungie? thought you wanted me to ride you, baby.”
he lets out this broken, choked sound, muscles tensing under you again as he full-on whines, his pretty lashes damp with the beginnings of frustrated tears as he lifts his head to meet your gaze.
“please,” he croaks, his cock leaking worse now, twitchy and wet against your folds. “p-please, baby, ride me. let me cum in you- fuck, just use me, i don’t care—”
you grin, finally sliding the tip past your entrance. all it takes is that first stretch around him, and jisung’s already gone, sobbing about how perfect you feel as you start to sink down fully on his cock <3
it’s 3 am, i wrote ts in under 20 mins bc i’m bored and extremely horny so gimme a break >~<
🔮 preview. When you’ve thought about your first time with Seungcheol, you always assumed he’d be the one taking care of you, but now you realize, although you’re the anxious one, your anxiety makes him extra nervous about doing something wrong. In this situation, you need to make the first move; you need to show him you want this, and as you adjust to sit up onto your knees, he grabs the bedsheets, a betrayal of how wound up he is over the fact that you’re finally ready for the next step.
tw/cw. Protected sex, foreplay, body worship, breast worship, big dick seungcheol, pussy eating, fingering, multiple reader orgasms, dirty talk, praise, hair pulling, sex while there’s a storm outside, mentions of past celibacy and wintertime sadness, mentions of a big fire and workplace exhaustion, lowkey soft first-time missionary sex, multiple sex positions, etc… I pet names: (hers) princess.
👹 rating.18+ explicit I wc. 7.9k
🍭 aus. Non idol au, fireman! Cheol, librarian! reader, a fireman saves a kitten from a tree and now you have a cute cat and an equally cute fireman, sad girl! reader, etc…
☀️ mlist + an. I used “Cinnamon Girl” by Lana Del Rey as inspiration and adapted some of the lyrics to form a plot for this fic.“Cinnamon in my teeth from your kiss, you're touching me. All the pills that you take: violet, blue, green, red, to keep me at arm's length, don't work. You try to push me out, but I just find my way back in. Violet, blue, green, red, to keep me out. I win. There's things I wanna say to you, but I'll just let you live. Like if you hold me without hurting me, you'll be the first who ever did.” I’m on new antidepressants because my doctor says I have severe depression, and I’ve been in my feels. Writing is an outlet, so I wanted to do something that felt applicable to some of the things I’m dealing with, while still being artistic and interesting.
One:
You’re walking a little faster than usual as you head home after finishing your shift at the library. Heart pounding, eyes scanning the trees as you get closer to the firehall- it’s your ears that pick up the small mewing sounds before you even see the kitten, who is still in the tree she was in when you were coming back from your lunch break four hours ago.
You stop by the trunk of the Callery Pear, whose autumnal purple leaves half obscure the black kitten as she struggles on a high branch.
Then, you look around, and your eyes land on the fire station. With a deep sigh, you cross the street toward the old brick building, wrapping your arms around yourself as anxiety floods through you.
You’re not the type to make a fuss about anything, not the type to bug others or ask for help, so when your eyes land on the broad shoulders of a man who appears to be doing pre-shift tasks with his back to you, it feels like the cat has your tongue.
Another deep breath and a shake of your own head to remind yourself that you can do this.
“Excuse me!” you call, not wanting to step into the station but instead stopping on the threshold of the large bay doors.
The man turns to look at you, and you swallow thickly at the sight of strong, regal features, of dark curly hair.
“Can I help you?” he asks, setting down whatever he was working on so he can turn his full attention toward you.
“Yes, um, I think so. There’s a cat,” you explain, pointing back toward the tree, “it’s been stuck in that Callery Pear for at least four hours. I saw it on my walk back to work after my lunch break, and now it’s still there. It’s just a small kitten-”
“Say no more,” the man assures you, slightly jogging toward the wall, where there’s a folded A-frame ladder. “Which tree?”
You hurry to show him where the kitten is, and as he sets up the ladder, he explains, “I just started my shift, I had no clue there was a cat up here, and our air vac system is pretty old and can be pretty loud, so I didn’t hear any meowing.”
“It’s alright,” you assure him, watching as the man begins to climb the ladder.
His red fireman shirt is tight on his shoulders, and you watch the way his muscles ripple under the fabric as he climbs.
You swallow the lump in your throat, heart racing as he sweet-talks the kitten, who allows him to pick her up and cradle her against his broad chest.
He slowly comes down to the pavement, checking the kitten as she purrs and cuddles closer to him.
“No collar, no ear tag, no nothing,” the fireman tells you. “Probably a street cat, we’ve got a lot of those kicking around. The fire department leaves dog and cat food out for strays, but I’ve never seen this cat before.”
“Have you heard of the cat distribution system?” you ask.
He laughs, looking up at you, handsome face alight with amusement. “Yeah, I’ve heard of the cat distribution system.”
“Well, maybe this is finally my chance.” You release a shaky breath. “I can take her to the vet, sort this whole thing out.”
“Works for me,” the firefighter nods, gently handing the kitten over to you.
“Thanks for helping me,”
The beautiful man smiles, turning to close up the A-frame ladder so he can get back to work. “Don’t mention it.”
Two:
You’re on the same route you always take home when the firefighter you saw a week ago waves you down from the station.
“Hey!” he calls, jogging to catch you despite his long, baggy, yellow bunker gear pants.
“Hello,” you nod, stopping to address him.
“I uh, I realized last week I never got your name,” the handsome man explains, coming to a stop in front of you.
“Y/N.”
“I’m Seungcheol. It’s nice to meet you,” he smiles, holding out a hand.
You swallow thickly, adjusting your book bag so you can gently press your palm to his. He’s soft with the handshake, and you’re quick to retract, downcasting your eyes instead of looking at this handsome, broad firefighter.
“So how’s the kitten doing?” he asks.
“Oh, she’s good. You were right about there being no microchip, so I officially adopted her. She’s named Brontë.”
“Brontë… that’s ringing a bell.”
“It’s a literary name, in reference to the Brontë sisters,” you explain.
“Oh.”
“I work at the library,” you tell him, skin heating with embarrassment. “I’m a bit of an English nerd.”
“That’s cool though,” Seungcheol assures you. “Listen, my shift starts in a moment, so I have to run, but I’m on schedule for nights for a couple more days, and then, I’d love to drop off some cat food or something if you’re okay with it. I feel bad that no other firefighters realized there was a cat in the tree, even though saving cats from trees is the most stereotypical non-fire-related job that firemen do.”
You find yourself giggling, and you can’t help but peek at the way Seungcheol’s face lights up as he smiles at you.
Then you correct yourself, looking down again.
You’re not in the market for a relationship. It’s the Fall, and soon it will be Winter, and this is your sad girl era. Now is not the time for cuffing season; now is the time for reading books and watching movies with your new cat in the warmth of your tiny apartment while the world rages and dies outside your window.
But… if it’s just some cat food he wants to drop off, that could be acceptable.
“I’ll give you my number,” you tell him, “I’m sure Brontë would love to see you.”
Three:
Seungcheol pauses at your door, adjusting his grip on the bag of cat food as he raises his knuckles to tap on the wood.
“One moment!” you call out, and he steps back to give you space as you appear on the threshold.
You’re wrapped in a cream coloured cardigan, and you look completely relaxed, as if you’d just put down a book. Seungcheol has always liked smart girls; cute nerds are definitely his type, and he finds himself kind of tongue-tied as he looks at you.
“I uh, I brought the cat food,” he chokes out, lifting the bag.
“Would you like to come in for a moment? I was just drinking some Chai tea and reading with Brontë.” You step to the side, and Seungcheol realizes that in your own home, you’re much more relaxed than the previous two times he’s seen you.
He steps into your apartment, and the sweet spicy scent of cinnamon perfumes the air around him. It must be from your tea, but he wouldn’t be surprised if the candles that litter the space are also to blame for the pleasing aroma.
There’s a small thump as the tiny black kitten jumps from the couch and stretches, yawning deeply before padding over to Seungcheol.
He can’t help himself; he puts down the cat food and picks up the kitten. She starts purring like a train engine, immediately cuddling up to his neck and trying to get into his hoodie, which she succeeds at despite his laughter and protest.
“Brontë likes you a lot,” you muse, drawing his attention as you shift to the kitchen. “Would you like to have some tea? It’s getting stormy outside.”
“That would be great,” Seungcheol tells you, highly aware that his plan was not to invade your space and annoy you, but you’re the one making the offers, so who would he be to turn them down?
Soon, the two of you are sitting in your small living room area, and your gaze shifts to the window as you sip on your tea.
“I like Autumn,” you muse.
“The rain and bad weather?” Seungcheol asks with a laugh.
“Yes, an excuse to stay inside and not talk to anyone.”
“I guess that’s one way to look at it,” Seungcheol nods. He plays with his teacup, bringing it to his lips. The taste of honey and cinnamon washes over his tongue, and he closes his eyes for a second to enjoy it before setting his tea down again. “If I’m being honest, I don’t really like the Fall, or the Winter for that matter. Seasonal depression is a bit of a hereditary thing in my family.”
“Seasonal Affective Disorder,” you nod, and it’s immediately clear that you’re also aware of the simply acronymed ‘Sad’ that so many people face. “I deal with that too.”
There’s a stagnant pause, but the room is not silent; instead, the pattering of rain on the cement outside becomes even louder, and your gaze shifts once more to the window.
“What got you into firefighting?” you ask.
“I always wanted to help people,” Seungcheol responds immediately, releasing a breath as the tensions shift in the room. He cuddles Brontë closer under his hoodie, and she purrs like a little engine. “Police men get a bad reputation at times, but firefighters are always the good guys. There’s no question that they’re there to save you, no question that we have the best intentions.”
“I can understand that.”
“And you?” he asks. “What made you want to be a librarian?”
“I just love books. I like peace. I don’t love people.” You let out a laugh, turning to look at him. “As an antisocial bookworm, the library felt like the place to be.”
“Makes sense,” Seungcheol smiles, admiring you.
You’re one of those dark, mysterious, moody, smart girls.
Just his type.
But you’re working on things, so it's clear that now is not the season to try to engage with you.
In many ways, the two of you are opposites.
Seungcheol is loud and social compared to your quiet aversion to talking. He’s an athlete; you’re clearly a girl who had her nose buried in a book during high school.
But regardless of these base-level differences, it’s also clear you’re kindred as people who know and have felt sadness.
You’re extremely alluring to him, but Seungcheol has never wanted to be the guy who disregards the social cues that a woman is not interested… only, you’re giving mixed signals, so he’s not quite sure what to make of you.
Instead of trying to figure all of this out, he simply sits with you, turning his attention to the storm brewing outside as he pets the tiny cat now cuddled in his hoodie.
This is a slice of life he could get used to, but if it is a fleeting moment, he’ll be sure to enjoy it as it comes.
Four:
“I’m really sorry about this,” you apologize when you invite Seungcheol into your home for the second time in one week. “The sink was leaking, and I just didn’t know who else to call.”
“You called the right person,” he assures you, slipping past you with his toolbag in hand.
You guide Seungcheol to the kitchen, showing him the leak under the sink, and he’s quick to get down onto his knees to start working.
Sipping your tea, you try not to be too obvious about the way you’re watching him, but his biceps are just so beautiful as he begins to use a wrench to tighten bolts.
Brontë is quick to jump onto his chest, and he jolts in surprise, only to laugh, reaching down to pet the black kitten. “Hi, Honey,” he greets the cat, and your heart flips in your chest at how soft this big, burly man is.
God, he really is so handsome…
Truly a Prince Charming, like the softer heroes you read about in your books.
Sure, he’s not a Mr. Rochester or a Heathcliff, but you’re entirely fine with that. Gothic love interests are always a touch too dangerous for you anyway.
“So a few bolts weren’t tight enough,” Seungcheol explains. “Try the water again.”
“With you under it?” you ask in shock.
“I’m pretty confident I’ve fixed the problem, might as well put my money where my mouth is,” he laughs.
With a shake of your head, you hesitantly turn on the water.
“Good as new,” Seungcheol concludes after a moment, adjusting himself out from under your sink. He sits up, cuddling Brontë close to his chest. “Any other broken or wonky things I can fix for you?”
You can’t help but laugh. “Not off the top of my head.”
“Oh.” He looks around. “Any art I can help you put up?”
“Not really,” you grin.
“Okay, well… I’ll get out of your hair then.”
Part of you wants him to stay, but you’re too shy to say it out loud, so you watch him stand up, collect his tools, and hand Brontë back to you. As you walk him to the door, he stops.
“I don’t want to overstep or anything,” he tells you, and you notice a pink tint in his cheeks, betraying he might be just as flustered as you are. “But uh… I was thinking maybe I could take you out for a coffee date or something sometime? I mean, we could do dinner, but you seem like a coffee date kind of girl to me.”
Your heart leaps into your throat, and you do your best to swallow it. There’s a war inside of you, with part of you wanting to stay in your little single bubble, and another part of you wanting to take a leap of faith with this beautiful man.
“No pressure or anything,” Seungcheol says, rubbing the back of his neck awkwardly.
“Sorry, no, I, uh… I just, I haven’t been on a date in a while,” you try to explain.
“Me neither,” he admits. “Maybe, if it’s less pressure, we can just say let's go out for coffee and leave the ‘date’ word out of it.”
“I think that would be nice,” you smile.
He returns your grin. “Perfect, it’s a coffee then,” he muses, adding a twist to the age-old saying ‘it’s a date.’
He can be kind of dorky, too, which isn’t something you expected from this beefy fireman, and your heart melts as you watch him go.
Five:
The coffee date that’s not a date, except that it is, is going better than you had imagined. Seungcheol is charismatic, honest, and intelligent, all things that you enjoy in a man. He makes you laugh, and you find yourself becoming more and more comfortable with him.
There’s still something in the back of your mind that tells you that maybe you should hold yourself back, that you’ve been burned before, that you’re still working on yourself, and don’t want to enter a relationship while you’re not fully healed.
But there’s the other side of you that acknowledges you’re not perfect, and despite that imperfection, you deserve happiness. You deserve to be laughing with a handsome man over coffee as it rains outside. You deserve to find some joy even as the seasons shift from bad to worse.
It’s clear neither of you wants the date to end, and you spend three hours in this coffee shop until the rain slows a bit, and then, with a sigh, Seungcheol offers to walk you home.
You both have umbrellas, and there’s a space between you as you meander down a couple of city blocks until you arrive at your apartment.
“That was a good coffee,” Seungcheol muses, once again using the word ‘coffee’ as a substitute for the word ‘date,’ and you can’t help but smile.
“It was.”
“You don’t have to answer right now, but I’d love to do this again sometime.”
“I think I would too,” you say, honesty getting the better of you.
Seungcheol’s smile widens, and the two of you stare at each other for a moment, then he leans forward and kisses your cheek. “Say hi to Brontë for me.”
Your skin practically burns from where his lips had brushed you, and your heart thunders in your chest. You trip over your words, whole body tingling. “Yes, I uh, I will.”
“See you soon,” Seungcheol promises, reaching down to gently squeeze your hand. With one final smile, he turns and leaves, and you stand in shock for a moment in front of your building, heart racing, whole body alight with a fire that contrasts with the cool fall air.
You feel giddy and excited, which are not feelings you’ve experienced for quite some time, and your hands are shaky as you push your key into the door to enter the building. You feel like you’re buzzing as you get back to your home, and you let out a deep breath as you reach your apartment.
Brontë lets out a soft mewl, stretching by the window before she jumps down to approach you.
You pick up your little blessing, kissing her soft head as he purrs with pleasure to have you home again. She’s already saved you in more ways than you can count.
Six:
Your second date is spur of the moment, as you’re sitting down to watch a movie, you decide to text Seungcheol, and upon a short back and forth, you invite him over to watch with you.
He’s as respectful as ever, waiting an entire movie before he asks if you want to cuddle, and he allows you to dictate how close you get as you adjust next to him, gently grabbing his arm and leaning against his shoulder.
You relax during this date, and when it comes to a close, standing on the threshold of your apartment, he asks if he can kiss you for the first time.
Your heart leaps at the question, and you nod, hardly able to contain a smile as he gently pulls you closer by your hips. One hand cups your cheek, and he moves in slowly, giving you ample time to change your mind before he presses his lips to yours.
It’s as if a ton of pressure is released from your body, your muscles relaxing as you melt into the kiss, pressing your palms gently to his broad chest as you lean closer.
Seungcheol adjusts, wrapping you in his arms, and you have to fight back a moan, your skin tingling with need.
Then, he pulls away, and you notice he’s breathing heavily, as if holding himself back from you is taking a lot of effort.
“We should do this again sometime,” Seungcheol muses with a half-chuckle.
You compose yourself too, managing a smile. “I would like that.”
Seven:
It’s been a month of movie dates and cuddling without taking the next step, and Seungcheol hasn’t brought it up at all. He seems perfectly content to spend time with you, to cuddle, and kiss… There have been heated moments for sure, but the two of you have always cooled down. If Seungcheol is good at anything, it seems he’s good at putting out fires, even metaphorical ones.
He has an inherent understanding that you need to take things slow, and his respectful nature draws you closer to him every day. You’re becoming used to being in his arms, used to the feeling of safety he has gradually brought you.
It’s a new experience, as all the guys you’ve dated in the past have ended up hurting you… badly.
But… you’re starting to realize, maybe not Seungcheol.
The most difficult thing about this budding relationship - which isn’t even Seungcheol’s fault - is that as a firefighter, he’s in a high-stress environment and can’t always be on his phone to message you back.
Sometimes you go a few hours without hearing from him, and it’s becoming increasingly difficult to endure that. It’s not that you’re worried he’s off with some other girl; he’s clearly not the type to be like that, but you worry about his safety.
Even with all of the safety rules in action for firefighters, accidents still happen, and you’d be devastated if anything happened to Seungcheol.
Tonight, you haven’t heard from him for about four hours, and you’re starting to worry. Even your books can’t distract you, and you keep checking your phone, but to no avail.
When there’s a knock at your door, your heart leaps into your throat, and your body freezes for a moment before you will yourself to stand up and see who is in the hallway.
A breath escapes you when you find Seungcheol standing there, but he looks worn out, and you immediately reach for him.
“Cheol?” you ask.
He doesn’t say anything, just wraps you in his arms, squeezing you desperately.
You melt into the hug, rubbing his back, and although there’s something clearly wrong, you’re just happy he’s here, happy he appears to be okay.
After a minute, Seungcheol pulls away, and you invite him into your apartment, where the two of you sit on the couch. You sneak closer to him, resting your hand on his thigh, giving him space to tell you what’s gotten him worked up.
“I uh…” Seungcheol swallows thickly. “There was this big fire, some low-level drug dealers made a kitchen in their apartment, and something went wrong. The whole building lit up. I just spent the last half of my shift there, and it was a lot.”
You nod, squeezing his thigh to show him you care while not wanting to interrupt his train of thought.
You can smell the smoke on him, although it’s clear he’s had a shower, his hair wet, yet still carrying the scent of fire.
“I don’t want to stress you out with the details, but I just…” Seungcheol lets out a deep sigh. “I think we both clearly have roadblocks. I can’t speak for you, but I know on my side, I have a dangerous job. Being a firefighter is rewarding for me, but I think I’ve held back a bit with you because I don’t want to put you in a situation to be hurt if something happens to me. And I think you have a past where you’ve been hurt before. I just… today made me realize, although we both are holding back for our own reasons, if something bad had happened to me today, I didn’t want you to be left wondering how I feel about you.”
Your breath catches as Seungcheol turns to look at you, and he places his hand over your own.
“I’m crazy about you,” he admits. “I knew there was something different about you from the moment we met, and getting closer to you this month has been the most rewarding thing outside of being a firefighter that I’ve ever experienced. I want to give you time, and I don’t want to pressure you, but if you’d consider being my girlfriend… I just… I’d love to take that next step with you.”
You feel tongue-tied as you look at him, and he’s as respectful now of giving you the floor to speak as you had been when he’d first sat down, so you collect your thoughts.
“I mean… It’s no secret that I struggle with depression. I’ve been hurt before, and it makes me scared of relationships. But… being with you this past month has been so different from anything I’ve experienced before.” Your voice cracks, and you swallow to control yourself, looking down at where your hands are connected. “I would love to be your girlfriend, it’s just scary sometimes to put yourself in a position to get hurt.”
“I know all about that,” Seungcheol admits, cracking a smile. “But the most rewarding things can come from putting yourself out there.”
“I guess we’re just built different,” you laugh. “You, the firefighter, me, the librarian.”
“I like that you’re a librarian,” he assures you, cupping your cheek while you lean against his palm. “You’re smart, and funny, and I always come away from my time with you having learned something new.”
“Yeah?”
“For example, the first time we talked, you pointed to a tree and called it a Callery Pear. That tree is one of the most common trees in the city, but I never bothered to learn its name. You taught me that. Now every time I’m on the streets, and I see one, it reminds me of you.” Seungcheol smiles. “You’re smart, and it’s one of the many things I love about you.”
Some past boyfriends have been intimidated by your brains. They’ve made your intelligence and memory something to be put down, but not Seungcheol, and your heart warms at his words.
“You’ve had a long night,” you tell him. “You must be tired.”
“I am pretty exhausted,” he concedes.
“Why don’t you stay here?” you suggest, feeling confident.
“Really?”
Even in a month of slow dating, Seungcheol hasn’t stayed at your home for a night, but if there were ever a time to rip the band-aid off, it would be now. You get the sense he needs the comfort, and you want to comfort him more than you’ve wanted to do anything in a long time.
“Come,” you prompt him, standing up. “I’ll get you a guest toothbrush, and we can get you settled.”
Twenty minutes later, you’re both set for bed. Seungcheol is lying flat while you curl next to him, and Brontë is on his chest, enjoying the attention from both of you.
This feels so natural, and you know it’s helping Seungcheol calm down after his stressful day at work.
Soon, you hear him softly snoring, and your entire body relaxes, knowing that you’ve helped this man find some peace.
Falling asleep next to a new man has always been something of a difficulty for you, but before you know what’s happening, you’re drifting into an unbothered dreamland.
Eight:
You wake up slowly, pressing against something warm. It takes you a moment to realize it’s Seungcheol, and he pulls you closer with a groan, still asleep.
A smile appears on your lips, and you release a deep breath, feeling your entire body relax.
That had been one of the best sleeps you’ve had in a very long time.
You open your eyes and notice some light coming through the blinds. It’s a grey day outside, and you can hear rain now, softly pattering against the window pane.
Brontë notices you’re awake and lets out a small chirp. She sits up and stretches, mewing at you.
After a moment of enjoying the situation, you carefully get out of bed, the little kitten running around your ankles as you go to the kitchen to get her some breakfast.
While she’s preoccupied, you go back to the bedroom, gently closing the door behind you.
Seungcheol is a vision even while he’s asleep, and you simply look at him for a few seconds, admiring him.
You pop into the bathroom, brushing your teeth and freshening up before going back to bed.
Returning under the warm covers, you cuddle up close to his chest, and Seungcheol stirs, letting out a soft groan as he takes you in his arms.
Everything about this feels so natural, and Seungcheol slowly wakes up, smiling as he cuddles closer, pressing a kiss to the crown of your head.
“Good morning,” he groans, and the deepness of his voice makes your skin tingle.
“Hi.”
“Been awake long?” he asks.
“Not really. How did you sleep?”
“Really good,” Seungcheol chuckles. “You?”
“Best sleep I’ve had in ages.”
“That’s nice,” he muses, pressing another kiss to your forehead.
The two of you cuddle, enjoying a soft, lazy Sunday morning, and then Seungcheol asks if he can have a quick shower. The smell of smoke is still clinging to his skin, and while it’s not necessarily a bad smell, you know a rinse off will make him feel better.
You wait patiently while he’s in the bathroom, and a short time later, he returns.
You put your book down, admiring the fact that he’s shirtless now, using a damp towel to scrunch through his dark curls while his sweatpants hang low on his hips.
You’ve never seen him like this, and while you’ve always known Seungcheol is beefy under his hoodies, finally seeing his uncovered form with your own eyes takes your breath away.
He’s an absolute vision, a true physical masterpiece, but you suppose you shouldn’t be shocked, as he’s a firefighter and being physically fit is part of his job.
“Do you have plans for the day?” you ask, putting your book on the nightstand.
“Was thinking maybe I could stay here with you for a bit, if that’s okay. I could also take you out for breakfast since we both have the day off. Whatever works.”
“That all sounds nice,” you muse, stretching and forcing your eyes away from his chisled body.
Seungcheol comes and joins you on the bed, gently grabbing the blankets to adjust them to cover your legs. “Are you cold?” he asks.
“A little,” you admit.
“Here.” Seungcheol gets under the covers with you, and you curl against his side, enjoying the warmth he provides. His hand gently strokes your arm, and you release a deep sigh.
“Where’s Brontë?” Seungchol asks.
“Eating breakfast.”
“The bedroom door is closed,” he muses.
“Yeah.” Your skin heats. “I thought maybe we could have some alone time.”
“Really?” Seungcheol laughs, tugging you closer to his body.
“Last night I realized how safe I feel with you,” you admit quietly. “I think… I’m ready for another next step, if you are.”
“Another next step,” Seungcheol echoes, and it takes a moment for it to click for him. “Oh.”
You laugh shyly, tucking your face down against his chest to hide your embarrassment. “Or not.”
“No, sorry, I just, I didn’t expect-” Seungcheol’s chest is blooming pink now. “I don’t want you to feel pressured that just because I asked you to be my girlfriend and you let me stay over last night, now you have to… put out, or whatever.”
“I don’t feel pressure,” you assure him, trailing your finger along his bare skin.
Seungcheol looks down at where you’re tracing his bicep, and he lets out a deep breath, shifting slightly. You avert your gaze, and that’s when you notice that he’s started to stiffen in his sweatpants.
Tingles erupt through you, and you move your hand down his body slowly until you reach his waistband. Then you look up at him again. “I want this,” you confirm. “Do you want me?”
He swallows thickly and nods, and you realize he’s holding his breath, waiting to see what you do next.
When you’ve thought about your first time with Seungcheol, you always assumed he’d be the one taking care of you, but now you realize, although you’re the anxious one, your anxiety makes him extra nervous about doing something wrong. In this situation, you need to make the first move; you need to show him you want this, and as you adjust to sit up onto your knees, he grabs the bedsheets, a betrayal of how wound up he is over the fact that you’re finally ready for the next step.
Part of you wants to just go for it, to pull his pants down, but it would be a shame for your first time to lack more foreplay, so instead, you mount him.
Seungcheol’s hands find your hips to steady you, and you press your palms against his broad chest, leaning down so your lips can meet.
He kisses you back desperately, and you love how he’s already coming undone.
Seungcheol cups the back of your head, and the kiss deepens as you begin to grind down slightly against him, earning a groan that sets your whole body on fire.
You can feel his cock pressing up against his sweatpants as you tease him, gently rocking your hips for stimulation while you remain in a heated battle of lips and tongues.
Part of you wants to continue, to move down toward where he needs you most, but kissing him just feels so good. Your entire body is buzzing with pleasure, and the anticipation of the ecstasy to come.
He’s stiff as a rock now, and even with clothing acting as a barrier, the feeling of a hard cock rubbing against your clit has you whimpering already.
Seungcheol finally breaks the kiss, panting hard, and you lock eyes as you both try to collect yourselves.
You reach a hand between your bodies, rubbing him through his sweatpants, which makes him groan again, his eyes closing. His hips rock slightly, pushing up toward your palm.
Then, quite suddenly, Seungcheol flips you onto your back, his lips finding your throat as you let out a giggle of surprise.
So maybe you won’t have to be the one taking control of this situation; maybe Seungcheol just needed a bit of a push.
He grinds down against your core at the same time his mouth finds your sweet spot, and you let out a moan, tangling your fingers through his hair.
One of his hands reaches up to cup your breast, his thumb teasing your nipple through your shirt. Your buds are hard and ready to be attended to, and when Seungcheol realizes this, his mouth descends from your neck.
You take the opportunity to try to get a breath while you lift your shirt, and he gives you enough space to take it off completely, now leaving your torso bare for him.
“You’re so pretty,” he groans, his hair tickling your skin as he leans down to lick one of your nipples, his hand massaging the other breast.
You can only mewl in response, your entire body lighting up with pleasure as he begins to suck on your sensitive bud.
As he works you up, you continue to tangle your fingers in his soft hair, using him as an anchor of sorts as you give yourself to him.
Your core is practically throbbing now, and you can feel your panties getting wetter by the second, your body anticipating something you haven’t had in months.
While you’ve chosen to be celibate and distance yourself from men, you still have needs, needs that have never been quite fulfilled while flying solo. You’re shocked at how sensitive your body is, how you react when he flicks his tongue against your nipple and makes you gasp, writhing against the bed as insatiable need overtakes you.
You’re getting more desperate by the second, but you do your best to take what he’s giving you, to let him choose the pace now.
By the time he sinks lower, kissing down your abdomen and hooking his fingers in your shorts, you’re sure your panties are soaked through.
“Can I take these off?” he asks.
“Please,” you moan, lifting your hips to make the task easier.
There’s a distant rumble of thunder outside, and the air in your room is cool as Seungcheol gets you completely naked, but there’s something comforting about sex during a storm.
Seungcheol gets down onto his knees next to the bed, and your heart skips a beat when he drags you closer, his breath warm on your wet core.
“Please, I need-” you whimper, writhing against the sheets already.
“I’ve got you,” Seungcheol promises, pressing a kiss to your inner thigh.
The slow way he works his mouth toward your core has your skin feeling electrified, and you’re throbbing by the time he makes contact with your pussy.
He starts with a long, drawn-out lick that ends with your clit, which he circles deliciously with the tip of his tongue.
“Oh my God,” you pant, throwing your head back as your entire body jolts from such a soft, yet intense motion.
You feel Seungcheol smirk a little as he continues to kitten-lick you, switching between soft kisses and languid movements with his tongue.
His warm hands find your thighs, and he pushes them into a spread eagle position, giving him plenty of room to work on you.
“Cheol!” you whimper when he takes your clit into his mouth, sucking on it with a little more pressure. “I’m close already!”
You’re not sure if your sensitivity is due to going so long without having the proper attention of a man, or if it’s because Seungcheol is just so good at this, and you have such a great connection. Regardless, your muscles are already tensing, and your eyes are clenched shut, your breath coming out in hot pants of pleasure.
Seungcheol lets out a small groan, and the vibration makes your legs shake, your body teetering on the edge. You understand his sound as an affirmation that you can cum, that he wants you to experience an orgasm without holding back.
So you don’t hold back.
You reach down and tangle your fingers in his hair again, prompting him to suck on your clit harder, and seconds later, your first orgasm crashes into you like the thunder that erupts in the skies outside.
You’re a moaning mess as he works you through your high, your core throbbing desperately around nothing as waves of pleasure overtake you.
Fuck, cumming has never felt this good, and it leaves you breathless as your muscles begin to relax.
You let go of his hair, and Seungcheol chuckles, pulling away from your core to look up at you.
“Was that okay?” he asks.
“That was amazing,” you tell him, heart still racing in your ribcage.
“Yeah?” He plays with your slit, rubbing you with a finger, toying the tip inside of you, and making you groan.
“More,” you demand. “Please.”
“You got it, princess,” he muses, pushing his digit into you, testing your walls, which immediately try to clench around him.
It feels like you haven’t been touched here in years, and your body is eager for this. As he finger fucks you gently, adding a second finger, you can hear your pussy squelching, its wet sounds mixing with the noise of rain splattering against concrete, brick, and glass outside.
“You sound so pretty when you cum,” Seungcheol muses, leaning in to press a kiss to your clit that makes you shiver. “I want to hear it again.”
Two orgasms before he even puts his cock in you?
You’ll take that action.
You wiggle your hips slightly, looking for more pressure, and Seungcheol responds by crooking his fingers up to find your G-spot. You groan deeply from the feeling, closing your eyes and focusing on the pleasure that’s still surging through you.
“Right there?” he asks.
“Right there,” you confirm. “Feels so good.”
Satisfied he’s found a good spot, Seungcheol presses his mouth to your clit again, sucking on the sensitive bud and making your legs shake.
“Oh my God,” you whimper, pleasure radiating out from your core and engulfing your entire body.
The combination of pressure on your G-spot and his mouth on your clit has you writhing within minutes, grasping at the bed sheets, heart thundering in your chest.
“Just like that,” you tell him, “I’m close again.”
Like the first orgasm, when you tell Seungcheol you’re close, he increases the pressure of his motions, sucking your clit harder and thrusting his fingers up into your sweet spot with a faster speed that has you seeing stars.
All you can do is whimper and moan in ecstasy as you get closer and closer to the edge again.
You let out a loud gasp and a moan when you cum, your core clamping down on his fingers, squeezing him as he works you through your second high.
Your entire body is pulsating. There are no thoughts in your mind as you give yourself completely to the pleasure.
He works you through your high until you’re twitching, almost overstimulated by all the sensations overwhelming your body. Then, Seungcheol pulls away.
You open your eyes to watch him lick his fingers clean, releasing a small groan, then he heads over to where his hoodie is lying on the floor. He pulls out his wallet. “I brought a condom just in case,” he tells you shyly, rubbing the back of his neck as his skin blossoms with pink.
“Good idea,” you tell him, still trying to catch your breath.
You adjust on the bed, scooting back up so you can rest against the pillows.
Seungcheol slips off his sweatpants, and you have to swallow the drool that immediately fills your mouth at the sight of him.
He’s big.
Maybe the biggest you’ve ever seen up close like this, and suddenly, you’re thankful he’d worked you open with his fingers because how else would you fit a cock of his size inside of you after being celibate for months?
He rolls the condom onto his cock, and then he joins you in bed.
You’re struck by how shy he is as you pull him close, pressing your lips to his pink cheek. “I want this,” you assure him again.
“I do too,” he tells you, nuzzling his nose against your throat. “Let me know if it’s too big or I need to slow down or-”
“You’ll be fine,” you tell him, nibbling on his earlobe. “We’ll make it fit.”
He laughs a little at your comment, and to try to show him you truly mean it, you reach between your bodies to grab his cock. Your thumb and pointer finger can’t even touch with the girth of him, and you groan as you adjust his tip to your entrance.
Seungcheol lets out a shaky breath, looking down at where you’re gripping him, then back at you.
As he pushes his tip into your wet core, he presses his lips to yours, and you kiss him back desperately as he stretches you open, slowly working himself deeper and deeper and deeper.
You can’t help the whimpers that escape you, your fingernails digging into his shoulders as your body adjusts to accommodate him.
When he’s fully snug inside of you, you both break the kiss to take strangled breaths, and Seungcheol swallows thickly. “Ready?” he asks.
“Yeah.” You nod, trying to slow the racing of your heart, but it’s a pointless attempt because when he slowly starts to fuck you, your pulse surges even faster.
“Oh my God,” you whimper, throwing your head back, which gives Seungcheol more room to press his lips to your throat.
He fucks you languidly, still giving your body time to adjust to his motions while he does his best to relax you with kisses elsewhere.
Your toes are curling already, and you adjust slightly, lifting your thigh higher onto his hip for a better angle.
The tip of his cock hits a spot deep inside of you that makes you groan, and you thread your fingers in his hair, drawing his mouth back to your own.
His pace is slowly increasing, matching the desperate way your lips are locked. The room is filled with the sound of skin on skin, the noise of the rain and thunder outside, and the music of moans intermingling as you find pleasure in one another.
“Wait,” you tell him, as you feel another orgasm threatening to bubble in the pit of your stomach. “I want to be on top.”
There’s a moment where he looks shocked, but then he nods, allowing you to flip him over onto his back.
You press your hands against his broad chest to get an anchor, enjoying the view of him below you. Then you slowly ride him. It’s a shift in pace, but it feels so good to be on top, and when he presses his thumb to your clit, your entire core tightens around him.
You let out a deep moan, throwing your head back and bouncing faster.
“You’re so pretty like this,” Seungcheol groans, his other hand cupping your breast and teasing your nipple, making you whimper even louder.
Then, he begins to rut his hips, fucking up into you and making you gasp.
“Cheol,” you groan, knowing that an orgasm is now extremely close.
Seungcheol sits up abruptly, cupping the back of your head so he can press his lips to yours.
You grab onto his shoulders, anchoring yourself better as you bounce desperately on top of his cock, chasing the high that’s so close you can almost taste it.
A few seconds later, you cum with a loud gasp, throwing your head back as your walls threaten to suffocate his length, which is still buried completely inside of you as you sink to a fully seated position.
Seungcheol growls, pressing his lips to your throat, and as your walls clench around his cock, he jolts, signifying that he’s cumming too.
Part of you wishes he didn’t have to wear a condom, but he’s a firefighter, so you suppose safety is in his nature. And the flimsy piece of rubber clearly doesn’t take much away from his own orgasm if his sounds are anything to rely on.
God, his groans are music to your ears, making you whimper even louder, clutching his shoulders as the pleasure engulfs you both as if you’re one complete entity.
Your legs are shivering, and as your orgasm subsides, Seungcheol slumps back down against the bed, looking up at you.
You’re both trying to catch your breath, but you lean down, kissing him one more time before you collapse against his shoulder, nuzzling your nose along his neck.
A large, warm hand strokes your back, comforting you as you twitch with aftershocks of one of the most insanely passionate orgasms of your life.
You spend a few minutes just breathing together, holding onto each other, and basking in the warmth and afterglow of your highs.
“I know you’re not supposed to have dessert before breakfast, but I could get used to this,” Seungcheol says, cracking a smile to finally break the soft, comfortable silence.
“I could too,” you admit with a chuckle.
“I still want to take you somewhere nice for food, though,” he assures you. “I’m not one of those guys who gets laid then stops trying.”
“Trust me, I know that.” You shake your head at him, charmed by how soft and shy and awkward he can be sometimes.
Seungcheol presses a kiss to your lips. “Maybe we could shower together first?” he suggests. “You know, proper aftercare and everything.”
Your heart melts for him, and you nod. “I’d love that.”
“Is it weird for me to say I’m excited about all of this?” he asks, his chest flushing that rosy pink colour that’s starting to become a signature of his. “I mean… you’re kind of my dream girl.”
“Cheol…”
“I mean it,” he says. “I just… I think this could really work.”
“I think so too.”
“And after breakfast, I want to go to a store and get more treats and toys for Brontë, since she’s the matchmaker behind all of this.”
You laugh, shaking your head at him. “Has anyone ever told you that for a big, burly firefighter, you’re kind of adorable?”
“Don’t tell my coworkers,” he teases.
You melt at his words, a happiness unlike any other overtaking you. As the storm continues outside, you and Seungcheol shower together, basking in the warmth and promise of this new relationship, and for the first time in a long time, you’re excited about what the future may bring.
☀️ mlist + an. thank you for reading! I appreciate those of you who responded to my post about the tough month I've been dealing with. I'm working on posting fics earlier but life has just put me through the wringer lately.
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🔮 preview. He’s so sexy, and you look up at him, loving the way the water drips down his chiseled chest, his curls all wet. You like the way his skin flushes, not from the temperature of the shower, but from you working him up with your mouth. The sounds he makes are the true goal, however, and the deep groans seem to echo in the small shower, filling you with confidence as you suck harder on his cock.
cw/ tw. Unprotected sex, shower sex, oral, pussy eating, blow job, multiple reader orgasms, reader overstimulation, praise, dirty talk, use of sex toy, vibrator, multiple sex positions, fingering, munch/pleasure kink!cheol, big dick! Seungcheol, etc… I petnames. (hers) princess.
👹 rating. 18+ explicit I wc. 2.3k I teaser wc. 100
🌙 starring. Seungcheol x afab!Reader
bonus
Springtime has so many new wonders now that you’re in a relationship.
You’ve always kind of morbidly enjoyed the death, decay and antisocial vibes of Autumn, but with Seungcheol, Spring is starting to signify new hope and joy.
He’s the king of cheesy dates, taking you to flower farms, on picnics, to the minigolf spot, and out for farmers market walks. Seungcheol has also taken to getting you lavender and other beautifully scented plants, and your apartment has truly never smelled so nice.
After months of discussion and relationship growth, the two of you are taking a new step.
Seungcheol is moving in with you.
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Description: Y/N's heat officially starts and Chan feels weird about going to work. It's okay though, because Hyunjin and Felix are home to help
[warnings: slick eating (like a ton), cum/slick play, threesome, male x male, knotting, face sitting, oral (Felix receiving), fingering, filthy kissing, piv, no protection, mentions of birth control, dirty talk, low-key avocado hate, alphas: Chan, Changbin, Hyunjin, Jeongin/omegas: Minho, Jisung, Felix, Seungmin, general omega verse antics]
read part 1 here!!
read part 2 here!!
a/n: hiiii again!! so this time I wasn't trying to stop before it got too long, but I did feel bad that it was taking me a thousand years to post, so more to come! I hope a hyunlix threesome can make you happy until the full blown orgy!! I think I added everyone to the tag list right again but forgive me if I messed it up! And thank you all for such nice comments :-) it really makes me happy I wasn't expecting anyone to like it!! I just had poly omega verse skz worms that needed to be unleashed hehe. hope you enjoy it!
9.4k+ words
Chan's knot has been sensitive all day.
At least the area around it has been. It always is, when his omegas are in heat; it's like his body was preparing to pop one at a moment's notice, so it just stayed ready, in a slight limbo. Which has never been a problem before when it's someone in his pack -- as a unit, and despite how difficult it could be to coordinate, all of them would take off when someone in the pack was going through their mating cycle. Maybe not for the whole week, but for at least a couple of days, when they would be in the thick of it. Then Chan's knot was ready to go for whoever wanted it -- whether it be the omega (or 2, or 3, or 4) in heat (sometimes their cycles matched up), or any of his other mates that wanted to be knotted (sometimes Hyunjin liked to be knotted. Changbin too, if he was in the mood, and Hyunjin himself had been trying to convince Jeongin that it feels good for alphas too, but he's still a bit reluctant).
It does become a problem, however, when he's stuck at work.
Regarding heat and ruts, that normally wouldn't matter. He worked in music production, which led to relatively flexible hours as long as he met his deadlines. If he needed a Tuesday off, then he could just crack through an all-nighter on a Wednesday to make up for it. He makes his own hours, for the most part, which is beneficial to being the pack alpha, so he can be around when necessary. And it was possible to take his work home too, both a blessing and a bother, because he could bring the work home all he wanted, but whether or not his mates would let him actually work on it was up for debate.
Still, whenever one of his mates needed him, Chan was there in a heartbeat. Even if he couldn't be, he knew that there were at least six others who could take care of whoever needed him until he could get there. Though that never does cease the restless feeling in his body, until he can get home, and in that regard, he's pretty useless at work anyway, with his mind far away (in his nest, with his pack), so he might as well just be home.
But he was the one who made a big fuss about their schedules and what it would look like trying to take care of an additional omega's heat with such short notice -- so he felt like he had to go. Especially since the others (save for Felix, who suspiciously had the next week off, and Hyunjin, who straight up just admitted he called out) had been going to work diligently, no matter how badly they wanted to stay with her. It wouldn't have been fair for him to stay when he'd all but encouraged and insisted at the beginning that they try to continue their days as normally as they could (granted this was before he'd experienced her purring, so. . .).
He thought it would be easier, though, since she wasn't his mate. At least, he didn't suspect it to feel so close to that gape in his body when he had to leave the nest for even a moment when Minho was in his heat. Or the way it felt like swallowing rocks to leave a pouting Jeongin shuddering and biting into his pillow when he'd tired all their omegas (and Hyunjin) out – to go get water. Not to mention when Changbin fusses at him with teary eyes for leaving him before he'd woken up (his mates were very open and vulnerable with their emotions at all times, which is really nice, since Chan had trouble doing the same -- they inspire him to be just as open).
All this to say, he thought that he would be able to go to work and actually get some things done. He should have been suspicious as soon as he woke up to find that she'd left his bed, and it felt like waking up without his pillow; he knew he wasn't going to be normal. A pout had fixed on his mouth as soon as he started his day, trying to tell himself that it was okay if she left bed before he had woken up. He snores pretty badly, especially on his back, so he's sure that must have pulled her from sleep. Or, in the fashion of the other day, one of his mates might have come to seek her out early in the morning to eat and cuddle. There had been faint traces of Minho's scent in his room, mixed a little bit with Jisung. Maybe they had sought her out.
And instead of just getting ready for his day and accepting that he woke up alone, Chan does go ahead and check each and every room for her. Starting with Jeongin's room (and finding Hyunjin sleeping, sprawled out and with half his body out of the covers, while Jeongin was scrolling idly through his phone), then Jisung's (who was snuggled up with Felix, like two small animals huddling for warmth -- Chan felt his heart urge him to crawl into bed with them), and Changbin was in Seungmin's room (there's no surprise there either -- except for the fact that Seungmin was still asleep, because he's usually awake by this time; having an omega in heat in the house does change some things, though).
As he opened Minho's door, he remembered the others accusing him of monopolizing his time with her. So he actually wasn't too surprised to see the two of them in there, surrounded in a tiny nest on his bed (a nest they would eventually relocate to the nesting room, as they always did), and it seemed like Y/N had been pilfering items of clothing from everyone. There was a small pile on Minho's reading chair (or "cuck" chair, as Felix had lovingly referred to it once), but Y/N seemed to have gotten distracted, stuffed under Minho's shirt instead. And Minho had his glasses on, watching something on his phone that he paused with a tap to the screen.
"I found this thief rummaging through closets and hampers this morning," he told him, "Then she came in here and fell back asleep. I’d be concerned with how much she’s sleeping if I didn’t know Jisung -- I hardly suspect she'll be as much of a brat though."
Chan felt at ease after finding them. Everyone in his pack. . .in the house, he meant -- had been accounted for, which settled something deep in his bones.
"Do you think it'll start today?" Chan inquired, because beyond the clear scenting that had taken place in there, Y/N's scent is far sweeter in Minho’s room than it has been thus far -- like a citrus-y dessert. It wasn't cloying, but he could taste it on his tongue, swallow it down to his belly.
Minho hummed, nodding, "I'm surprised it didn't start yesterday," he admitted, "I was looking into it though -- omegas like her. It has something to do with like. . .genes that date back thousands of years: the purring, the need for a pack, apparently even sleeping up under the shirt too. They’re things that most omegas got rid of, over centuries, the less a pack was needed." He started to trace designs on her shoulder, "When she was lucid enough for me to poke her brain, she mentioned always being like this, though. Both her parents are omegas too, so I'm sure that has something to do with it. It's just interesting," he sighed, softly, "I don't want to leave her today, but it's too late for me to get a class covered."
Chan nodded in agreement, "I'm. . .having trouble too," he admitted, because he could only admit this to Minho, "Who will be here?"
"Felix and Hyunjin," he plucked at his lip with his free hand, "Jeongin should be getting home early today too, so it isn't like she'll be alone, but-- you know. It feels wrong to leave her."
"I -- yes," he agreed again, "I feel. . .weird about it."
"Don't." A voice, muffled, comes from underneath Minho's shirt. He and Minho both stare at each other with wide eyes for a second, startled she’d been eavesdropping, as Minho carefully takes the hem of his shirt and peels it up, revealing Y/N (who was very much awake). She pushes up a little but not entirely off Minho's belly, "Feel bad -- don't," she shook her head, "I'll be okay," she nodded then, and Chan could see the amount of effort she was putting into getting the words out again -- just like she did last night with him. It made his heart too tender and soft; malleable for her. "I'll nest and wait for you to come home."
Minho is the first to speak, sighing softly when he went to cradle her cheek, "Yeah? Yongbokkie will be here to take care of you, kitty," he murmured, running his thumb over her soft skin, "Hyunjin too, but I think you'll be taking care of him more than vice versa. He gets so scent drunk when one of us is in heat."
Y/N tilted her head back down and nuzzled into Minho's stomach, rubbing her head back and forth like an actual cat -- and had her purrs coming out like one too. Chan decided he had to leave then or he'd miss the window where his alpha would allow it. So he told them that he had to go, and high-tailed it out of there before she could look at him and change his mind.
So that's where he's at. He was already struggling through his day the moment it started, and then on top of that, Yongbok and Hyunjin are cruel, cruel creatures. His phone has been buzzing all day, non-stop, and he doesn't have it in himself to ignore what they're sending, despite knowing it would make him more miserable. Because what if they needed him? What if there was an emergency? What if Y/N's heat was more than they could handle alone, and he needed to come home immediately?
Hyunjin
pleaseeee, i need her always
so pretty
cute
i wanna crawl inside of her
Seungmin
Stop being a freak
. . .Send pictures
Jisung
Yeah, SEND NUDES NOW!!!!!
DON'T GATEKEEP 😤
I NEED THEM
Felix
Didn't take pics of her bc we didn't discuss before
took some of hyunjinne tho
look how wet his mouth is
guess what it's from
image_143.JPG
Changbin
I'm going to pass out 😣
Felix
Go on, guess, guess, guess, guess
Hyunjin
Yongbok and Y/N taste so good together
need to put their slick in jars for later use
Minho
I can't believe I left my sweet kitty with two degenerates
Tell her I'll be home soon to save her
Did you give her the fruit I sliced this morning
Felix
ye ye
she and jinnie are sharing strawberries rn
she keeps turning her nose at the avocado tho I don't think she likes it
Minho
force feed her, she needs the fiber and oleic acids
Jisung
😧
Jeongin
enough.
I CAN'T THINK, my phone has been going off every three seconds
tell noona I'll be home in an hour
Chan all but slams his head down into his arms on the table in front of him, knocking into his keyboard and adding a reverb that didn't belong.
It was only 10 AM. This day was going to drag.
. . .
Felix loved omegas, and he loved being an omega.
He doesn't know why. Maybe it's because he had an upbringing that was very omega-positive; despite both of his parents being betas, they were very supportive in his presentation and did everything they could to help him transition into life as an omega. From finding him groups to be a part of, screening online forums, and contacting family members who were also omegas. They made sure he was surrounded by people who not only shared his subgender but also loved it too.
Anyway, he's always loved it, and he loves them. He loves his alpha mates, too, of course, more than anything in the world. It's just a different type of love that he has for his omegas.
Which is why he was so adamant that Y/N join them for her heat.
It hadn't been his first time hearing her discuss it. Of course, his sweet friend was always so self-sacrificing (like someone else he knew closely), and very dismissive of her own problems. She'd told him her heats weren't great all the time, but had downplayed it severely. Actually, he remembers her describing it along the lines of, "Yeah, you know, they're crampy, I'm hot, making everything sticky -- the usual."
Felix always had a feeling that she wasn't being super honest, since her heats would take her out of commission for like two weeks (sometimes even three). The heat itself was never that long, but the recovery time always seemed sort of lengthy and horrible. He and Minho had brought her meals a couple of times after the worst of it was over, and the sight of her always made his heart ache. With bags under her swollen eyes and lips bitten dry and red, sometimes she'd even have bite marks on her arms like she'd been trying to quiet herself. Still, she was always smiling, acting like it wasn't that bad.
"Thank you so much, you really didn't have to," she told them, when Minho would set the food (warmed up on the stove) in front of her, "I feel bad that you came out of your way."
"No talking, just eating," Minho would always silence her, stuffing the chopsticks in her mouth with a bite of whatever it was he'd made for her (typically something hearty, with a lot of mind paid to ingredients that would help repair her body), "Yongbok tell her about that awful game you're keeping Hyung up at night yelling over."
So when she finally admitted that they were bad enough, her doctor was concerned, and that she needed to be with a pack -- he was over the moon. He'd offered his help to her a couple of times, but he could sense she turned him down because he was mated, and she was always worried about overstepping boundaries and all of that. It's why they had to initiate the scenting with her most of the time.
He both does and doesn't feel bad for snapping at Chan when they had her muted. Chan is a good person, and he's an amazing pack alpha who is always so concerned with the welfare and both physical and mental well-being of his mates. Almost to a fault, at times, where he forgets that there are other people out there who can need the same amount of love and attention. He'd been so concerned about what everyone would think that he hadn't been considering the distressed omega on the other line, finally asking for help. But he didn't know the history of it -- Felix realized that later, after talking it through with Seungmin in his carefully curated nest (Seungmin makes the best nests out of everyone). He'd never discussed with Chan that he suspected her heats were worse than she'd admitted. So how was he supposed to know?
Still, he needed to know how serious it was, and for that reason, Felix is glad that he stood up for her as intensely as he did.
Y/N fits in perfectly with them always, but even more so like this. A lot of omegas handle heat differently; a hormonal shift accompanied by the overbearing warmth that filled the body was not for the faint of heart. Every omega in his pack has similar but different responses to their cycles, and it has taken a long time to get everyone's varying needs and wants in order.
Minho is extra snuggly leading up to his heat. He is quite snuggly in general, but in secret -- private cuddles in his nest or quiet nuzzling on the sofa while he watches something with you are his preferred methods. But before his heat and during, anyone, anywhere, at any time could have their arms full of their pouty cat hyung, grumbling something about them moving too much and to stay still before he "makes them". He starts making his nest a couple days before as his instincts dictate, and he typically "allows" Chan to prep his heat meals (by allowing, he means sitting in the kitchen and watching with a keen eye while he cooks -- but if anyone is capable of dealing with a hormonal Minho who doesn't have control in his kitchen -- it's Chan). During his heat, he likes to be knotted several times the first day, even if he's sore and achy afterward. He prefers staying locked together for a while (which is what Innie is good for -- his knots never go down quickly), and he likes it when he has someone to sit on his face -- omega or alpha, he doesn't care. He likes to shower at least once during the three days -- otherwise, he'll tolerate being wiped down if he's too weak to stand for too long.
Seungmin is a little more particular about his heats. Like Minho, he begins rummaging through their mates' closets, drawers, and hampers a couple of days before it should hit fully. He keeps them safe in his room, in a container made specifically for safekeeping the clothes, pillows, and blankets he plans on using. He's a little moody but he's quiet about it; the only reason Felix can ever tell is because his sweet face is all pouted, and his forehead is scrunched, but the softness in which he speaks doesn't alter too much (at least with Felix -- the same cannot be said for Changbin, who swears that Seungmin is the biggest brat before his heat). He wants to be doted on, but he fights at first so that he doesn't come off too needy. And he cleans, and cleans, and cleans around the house like property management was going to come and check for dust on the top of their door frames. Once his heat actually hits, he's a sweet little thing -- all quiet mewls and head butting. He likes to be manhandled into positions and held there. His preferred method of sleeping is safe beneath someone, typically an alpha, but one of his omegas would do too. He wants to eat the same thing for all four days (much to Minho's dismay), and requests a shower daily -- maybe even twice a day if he can get away with it. They change out his pads and sheets the most of all of them.
Jisung is low maintenance in some things but high maintenance with others. For him, nesting doesn't matter as much -- as long as he has like one good hoodie and maybe a blanket that everyone's scented, then his nest is as good as complete (though Seungmin can't stand the thought of it, so he always ends up making him a proper nest anyway). They sort of have to force him to eat and drink because he isn't focused on it at all. His preheat lasts all of a day and a half (he sleeps a ton for like a week leading up to it) before he's in the throes of his heat, and is the biggest brat that he could ever be. He growls at them sometimes, fusses, and whines when he doesn't get his way. If it were up to him, then he would have a knot ready for him as soon as the one inside of him deflated. He wants his mouth stuffed even though he gags when they press too far, and he wants his hair pulled, and he whines until someone realizes that his back is itchy, but he won't tell them. Like Seungmin, he wants to be doted on, but unlike Seungmin, he isn't keeping it a secret. They all hear, "You have to be nice to me, I'm in heat," at least three times an hour from him. Still, despite his brattiness, he can be sweet -- normally when Minho has edged and denied him a couple of times, and “Alpha Chan” comes to save the day and plugs him full. He and Hyunjin go at it like absolute animals, and he whines and cries for Changbin to knot his mouth. He also likes to have his fingers inside of his "comfort hole," which is usually Felix or Seungmin (Minho if he's feeling kind and rewarding Jisung for eating). They just wipe him down until he's strong enough to shower, and he refuses to let them change the pads or sheets.
Felix would love to say that he's more low-maintenance than his other mates, but really -- he couldn't tell you. Nobody has ever complained about him, and they admit that they honestly miss his voice a little bit. When his heat hits, he's mostly nonverbal now -- a luxury that not many omegas are permitted. There is such intense and devout trust that he has in his mates to know exactly what he needs from physical cues alone, save for a few vocalizations he can manage (mostly whining and moaning). He makes his nests two days before, strategic in his stealing pattern, and it just depends on the month, from whom he has more clothes. Felix nests with it in his bed, puts up a little fight when they have to move it to the nesting room, but settles into it easily. Before he had a pack and mates, his heats were so painful that he used to be anxious every time he could sense one was coming. But now that he has his lovely pack, he knows he doesn't have to worry about anything. He eats whatever is given to him, even the things he usually turns his nose up at. He likes to be knotted, sure, but he has to have one of his omegas with him the whole heat -- it doesn't matter who. They just have to spend a majority of their time in the nest with him, and he'd like it if they were getting knotted too (he calls it "knot bonding," and when he explained it to them, Hyunjin told him he'd never heard of something so beautiful in his life). He lets them do whatever, as far as bathing. If someone wants to run him a bath, he'll get in it. If it's just a quick wipe down, he doesn't mind that either. He's pretty chill.
So, of course, he was interested to see what Y/N was like in her heat. Her preheat, he thinks he has down. Felix is unsure he's ever met someone more cuddly, leading up to it ever, in all the omegas that he's known. Cuddling is nice, sure, but usually the warmth swelling in your body starts to discourage it during brief periods to cool down, but that doesn't seem to be a problem for her. She's warm, sure, but she's not as hot to the touch as Jisung gets, or even Seungmin. The way she disappears beneath their shirts just lets him know how desperate she'd been for that proximity -- that comfort that she'd been lacking before. The purring is so beautiful, Felix wonders how he's going to go to bed without it, since most nights he practically kidnaps her before sleep so that he can feel the vibrations rumble through him.
She sleeps a lot like Jisung, but unlike their Jisungie, she's not as bratty. Or, well, Felix could make an addendum to that. She could be quite bratty, but she was only bratty with a couple of people and not others, whereas nobody is safe from Jisung's tirade. Felix notices that she'll fuss and whine at Minho and Hyunjin mostly. Changbin, if he was nearby. He doesn't know why it's those two (Changbin, he knows, because it's just easy to be bratty with him -- all of them are, even Chris), but Minho is always placating and sweet with her, and Hyunjin is such a sucker for omegas, she could probably punch him in the jaw and he'd still drink her slick.
Y/N has been eating and drinking when prompted. Felix has been showering with her because. . .well, he just wants to, and when he asked, she smiled and started stripping before they'd even made it to the bathroom.
Cramps are another thing that's different for each omega. Minho and Jisung have milder cramps that can be soothed with some scenting. Seungmin's are a little stronger and last for a longer duration, but are also relatively easily soothed. Felix, like Y/N, had horrible heats before joining the pack. He'd become so feverish that sometimes he had to be given meds, and his cramps were so horrible, he'd be doubled over in pain. While being with his mates helped it a great deal, it was still quite hard to manage sometimes.
Y/N's are pretty strong, but Felix has been keeping a hand over her lower belly when he can. If she allows him to spoon her, he presses his small hands just below her belly button, and her purrs reach a frequency that he's certain is healing him of anything he's ever experienced. This morning, as the cramps got worse, Hyunjin and Felix started to take turns resting their palms where it aches.
Her need grows gradually. Minho had her in his room this morning, and Felix thinks they cuddled because when he went to retrieve her, she smelled just like him. He was getting ready, showering in his bathroom, when Felix creaked the door open, and Y/N was awake for once, squinting eyes at her phone like the brightness was a lot.
"Good morninnnggg," he sang at her, and when she looked over to him, a grin spread across her face, "Want to cuddle?"
She nodded, but made no move to leave Minho's bed. It's then that Felix realized she had started making a nest there, and he was still groggy enough not to want to bother with moving it just yet. So he crawled into bed with her. They fell asleep again with his hands on her belly, and weren't woken up again until Hyunjin pressed the door open and crawled inside. Everyone must have already gone to work because Felix doesn't hear any distant chatter or movement around the house. All he senses is the alpha that's slowly but surely making his way up the bed, resting his cheek on Felix's belly.
When he reached his hand down to pet Hyunjin's head, he met with other fingers already caressing his scalp. That does coax Felix's eyes open, and he finds Y/N already awake again -- she hasn't been for long, if her puffy face is anything to go by. But she looked so cute that he wanted to press kisses all over her cheeks and the pout of her mouth, especially when she gave him a sleepy, sweet smile.
Felix was about to let himself melt into the mattress again, but he took one look at her and knew they would need to move the nest sooner rather than later. There was sweat beading at her temple, her eyes were a little glossier than they had been (how they get in the haze of heat), and her scent was even more prominent than it was before. He's surprised that they didn't get more stragglers in here this morning, actually, from how deeply it was beginning to embed itself in the air around them. Though he suspects Minho warned them to let her rest while she could.
"How about we move to the nesting room, hm?" Felix inquired, petting her hair out of her face, thumbing away the droplet of sweat that had trickled down her cheek, "You can finish making your pretty nest in there."
Y/N stared at him for a second, and he would think she was sleeping with her eyes open if he didn't know she was only trying to formulate a response. Sometimes the heat makes your brain feel so sludgy that it takes a second to process and respond, especially if you're prone to going nonverbal (like Felix is). Honestly, he commended her for even making the effort to speak at all.
"Channie won't mind?" She finally said, head tilted, "Since I'm not. . .pack. I don't want to ruin. . .ruin your nest."
Hyunjin, who had been silently soaking in his alone time with two omegas, made an affronted sound in his throat, "No, baby, of course not," he shook his head, a small frown on his mouth, "Chan's probably so sad he isn't here right now, he'll be stoked to see you in the nesting room when he comes back. It'll settle something in his instincts, I'm sure."
"You could never ruin our nest," Felix added, "You could only make it sweeter. Do you smell yourself?" She giggled softly.
So they carefully move everything to the nesting room, just a few doors down. It's a small room with a bathroom attached, but it serves its purpose nicely. There's a big mattress on the floor, tucked against a corner in the room to make it easier to line the edges with pillows and blankets without having to worry about it falling off. The bed itself is always covered in waterproof mattress pads and slick protective sheets, along with a couple of blankets that his mates come in to scent semi-regularly. That way, it was always available and ready for anyone who needed it.
Felix helped her construct it. At first, he was going to sit off to the side and watch her work, but she made it very clear when she shoved a pile of clothes into his hand that this was a group endeavor. Most of the things in her nest belonged to the pack, save for a couple of items she brought in her suitcase to add more of herself to it. She's a little more meticulous about some parts of the nest, like where her head would most likely be; she is very diligent about getting everyone's scent to line the top. Otherwise, she's just placing things in gaps and filling in holes.
When she bent over to grab a pillow she'd knocked down, Felix was supplied with the image of her shirt rucking up. It revealed that she had no bottoms on, which was a given, but it also revealed the huge, slick stain on her panties and the way her thighs glistened. If Hyunjin had been in here, he would've dropped to his knees and buried his face between her legs in an instant. Felix was having a really hard time not doing that himself, but he knew how annoying it was to get distracted in the middle of curating your nest. They were just lucky that Hyunjin was in the kitchen getting the sliced fruits together for Y/N to nibble on.
He may have been patient enough for her to finish building her nest; however, as soon as she crawled into the middle and smiled (indicating she was pleased with it), Felix was on her in three seconds. Hyunjin returned to the nesting room with Felix on top of her, his tongue in Y/N's mouth and his hand between her thighs. She was drenched when he slid his fingers into her panties; it was a soaking mess, and her clit was a stiff bud that he could easily flick with his thumb. She's sensitive, jumping and twitching, squeezing her thighs around him when he slips his fingers inside of her. Her walls are swollen, squeezing his fingers -- he can only imagine what his cock would feel like inside of her. The thought had him slicking down the back of his thighs.
Hyunjin whined, the plate he brought in clinking on the nightstand when he dropped onto his knees on the bed. Felix laughed against her, pulling back just in time for Hyunjin's face to be closer, "He wants kisses too," Felix told her, her lips already kiss swollen and slick with spit, "Go on, baby, he wants it so bad, look at him."
The alpha is waiting not so patiently, mouth hung open, so clearly wanting her to lick against his tongue. Y/N craned her neck to reach him, but he met her halfway, and their tongues slid against each other outside of their mouths for a little bit. Felix felt himself leak into his briefs further, both precum and slick. He finds her G-spot and pokes and prods at it, stroking against it incessantly and feeling her rock her hips up into him. His fingers aren't very big, but he's a big believer that it isn't the size that matters, but if you're able to use them. He knew that Hyunjin, Jeongin, Chris, and Seungmin had longer fingers that were knobbier and reached deeper. He also knew that none of the omegas came harder than when Felix fingered them with his small ones.
He fits three inside of her and watches them kiss. Hyunjin always kisses so messily, and Y/N matches it readily, moving her head with his, sliding her hand behind his head, and he holds onto her throat. His thumb pressed against her scent gland just as the sound of his fingers inside of her got louder, squelching, and Hyunjin moaned so loudly, you would have thought he came. Honestly, he might have, you could never be too sure with him.
When Y/N cums, she crushed Felix's hand between her soft thighs. Her whole body trembles, and she's unable to keep kissing Hyunjin, only moaning wetly and uselessly into his mouth. He worked her through it, kept fucking her while she pulsated rhythmically around his fingers, and ground her clit against his palm. When the intense pulsing turned into light, overstimulated little flutters, he slid his fingers out and brought them up to Hyunjin's lips.
He slid her slick around his mouth, on his cheeks and chin, up under his nose. Some people may find it gross, but this is Hyunjin's ideal way to spend his morning. He moaned again, sounding like he'd knotted himself, and his tongue left her mouth to find Felix's fingers, pulling them between his lips to suck on. Felix chuckles as he pets his tongue, cooing at Y/N, who watched intently.
"You want alpha to fuck you full of his knot?" Felix asked her, removing his fingers and drying them on Hyunjin's shirt, before tucking his fingers into his pajama bottoms. He started to tug down, revealing (unsurprisingly) that Hyunjin hadn't been wearing underwear, when his cock bounces and slaps up against his lower belly, smearing precum below his belly button. His knot was already starting to swell, Felix could tell, and he almost snickered. Hyunjin was so easy for it. "Hyunnie cums so much when he's keyed up, baby, you'll feel it in your belly."
They had discussed it all beforehand -- knotting and cumming inside. It was actually something Y/N had requested, admitting to them that it'd been a very long time since anyone had actually knotted her. She was on the same birth control that the entire pack took, and she showed them the paperwork to prove she's clean (though the paperwork was entirely unnecessary), so they all agreed it would be okay. And Felix knew firsthand how disappointing it could be to not have anything dripping out of you after being artificially knotted. It takes away from any post orgasmic glow you could've had.
"Yeah, I'll stuff you full," Hyunjin promised, "I'll make you squirt, then I'll eat all my cum out of you."
Y/N shivered, then scrambled to sit up, pressed at Hyunjin's shoulders so he'd roll over with his back on the bed. She straddled him, using one hand to stuff his shirt up to reveal his stomach, and the other, she reached for Felix. He slid up beside her, scented her while she whined at him, "What, what, baby, what is it?"
"Sit," she ordered, one hand pressed against Hyunjin's stomach, to the left of the pretty mole there, "His face -- sit, please."
And what could he and Hyunjin do but satisfy her every wish? She's a special guest, after all. Plus, she'd asked so nicely.
Felix hovered over Hyunjin's face after stripping down to nothing. He was the most naked of all of them, but he figured the others would be following suit sooner rather than later. Hyunjin's hands rested on Felix's pale, freckled, creamy thighs while they waited for Y/N to mount him. Technically, Felix could sit down now, but he likes the tortured sound the alpha makes when he slips inside, so he wanted to hear it without any barriers.
They both watched as Y/N's fingers slid around his shaft. Hyunjin was by far the biggest of all the alphas -- he was pretty tall, so it made sense. He said a love of slick made it grow three sizes or something stupid once, but honestly, Felix wondered if there was some truth to it because it was big and beautiful. A size queen's dream, truly. The tip was always red and readily wet, dripping from even the most minimal stimulation (or sweet words and romantic gestures -- he got love boners frequently), and led down to a girthy shaft and full, swollen balls. His pubes weren't shaved bare, but neatly trimmed, in a soft little tuft that only Jeongin could really rub the tip of his nose in ( the "having no gag reflex" shocked all of them, but with how he stuffed food into his mouth, they should've known). Right now, they were a little matted from how much he'd been leaking into them.
Felix twitched above him, leaking more slick that dribbled down his thigh. Y/N brushed her thumb over the head, then dug it into the slit, and they both listened to Hyunjin cry out because of it; his hips twitched into her palm. The sight of it was pretty -- if they'd discussed pictures beforehand, then he would have definitely pulled his phone out to take one. Her fingernails were done relatively recently (she had sent him photos after she left the salon), and they looked like glittery jelly, way too pretty against Hyunjin's already pretty cock. Especially when she sits up on her knees again, and slick slides out of her in an impressive amount, dripping down onto his cock and pubes.
He would think he's just down bad for everything to do with her, if not for Hyunjin murmuring something about wanting to paint this whole picture. Y/N let the tip nudge at her hole, rocking her hips gently until he started to slip inside of her. The sound Hyunjin made is so worth the edging Felix was doing to himself; broken and desperate, turning into this grumbled, growl that vibrated through his chest and rumbled through the room. It's only after he finished that Felix sat on his face while Y/N took more and more of him in, going quicker than Hyunjin probably would have had her go if he was the one controlling the pace.
Hyunjin immediately started to flicker his tongue against Felix's puffy rim, swollen and wet as he flattened out against it, and dragged the wet muscle over him. Warm saliva made his whole body twitch while Y/N moaned, toes curling, her fingernails digging into Hyunjin's sides as she seated herself just above his knot. He could tell she was squeezing around him, if Hyunjin's moans were anything to go by, and he imagined that if her walls were as swollen, puffy, and soaked as they had been when he was fingering her -- it must feel like paradise. And the same goes for Y/N, who he knew was being stretched so full, satiating something deep inside of her when she felt the tip pushing against her cervix.
"S'good," Y/N mewled, rutting down onto him, a whine pitched in the back of her throat, as her palm rested against her lower stomach, "Can feel you here, can feel alpha in my belly."
Hyunjin groaned, sucked on Felix's rim, and his hips bucked uselessly from below. His fingers dug into Felix's thighs as he pulled him down harder onto his face. It seemed like Felix always had to be the mindful one so Hyunjin wouldn't suffocate, because he was definitely willing to in the name of eating slick. There was almost too much stimulation for Felix, being eaten like that while he watched Y/N fuck herself on Hyunjin's cock. Her hips are clumsy and unpracticed, but it's the best thing Felix thinks he's seen all month. She leaned back, breathless, tugged her shirt up just above her belly so that Felix could visualize her getting stretched open on his boyfriend. Strings of slick and precum cling between her thighs, to her pussy, and his cock, stretching and snapping, only to stick back together. It looks like a sticky, delicious mess that he wants to stick his hands in and get his fingers wet with it.
There's a moment where she almost slipped onto his knot when Hyunjin's hips jerked again, the swell of it tugging at her entrance, but Y/N gasped and forced herself to stop. "No!" She shook her head, "Not -- not yet, need -- Lixie needs to cum."
It is once again that Felix is reminded how desperately Y/N belonged in a pack. To still be so concerned about someone else's pleasure in the throes of her own heat -- if he thought about it too much, it might bring a tear to his eye. Hyunjin's tongue wriggled against the ring of muscle that opened easily for him, and the sound that left Felix was wanton and loud. She dropped the shirt in favor of leaning forward, pretty fingers circling Felix's shaft before squeezing and milking him. It's in a pattern that's reminiscent of what he felt on his fingers when he'd been stretching her open and making her cum, and that, plus his mate's tongue licking inside him -- sent him spiraling toward the edge.
His orgasm tore through him, slicking against Hyunjin's tongue, and throbbing in Y/N's palm. He squirted cum on her belly, covered her shirt, then it dribbled down to Hyunjin's stomach, a rivulet dripping down to his slutty little waist mole, and then the rest painted milky over her knuckles. Felix was out of breath, panting a little when he raised on shaking legs to move off Hyunjin's face. Normally, he likes to stay there for a while and ride out the aftershocks of his orgasm, but as Y/N was looking out for him to cum, he wanted to look out for her. And despite the damn near shocking amount of self-restraint she had, he could see how difficult it was for her not to move.
He flopped down on the spot beside them, watched as Hyunjin caught his breath, face slick and shiny. "Thank you, baby," Felix petted the hair out of Hyunjin's face, then turned to Y/N, "And thank you too, baby. Both of you are taking care of me -- so sweet. I think it's time for you to get knotted, hm?"
Hyunjin tugged her down closer to him, gasping when Y/N squealed and probably tightened up around him. His thighs spread when he planted his feet on the mattress, and his hands grabbed onto her sides. This urged her to be chest to chest with him, their messy shirts rubbing together, though the bottom hems started to rise up, so the skin of their stomachs was touching. Felix guided her head into Hyunjin's throat where she sucked in greedy lungfuls of his scent, "Knot me," she ordered, lips moving against his skin, "Want it so bad, wanna feel you paint my insides, warm and gushy and, ah --"
"Fuck," Hyunjin growled again, grip tight on her hips as he started to fuck up into her. Each thrust of his hips upward punched a sweet moan out of her mouth, which threatened to make Felix's dick twitch again. Y/N's fingers dug into the pillow covered in Jisung's shirt beside Hyunjin's head, when his knot started catching on her walls, "Yeah, g'na stuff this pretty pussy for me. Sweet little omega, need to be full -- Jinnie will do it, Jinnie will make you full." And he must be really far gone, scent drunk and out of it if he's referring to himself in third person. 2 v 1 Hyunjin with another omega is always so much fun, because he's desperate for it, and easy. It's one of the reasons Felix wasn't pouty about Hyunjin taking off work too, to be with her, therefore interrupting his cuddle and purr time because he knew he'd have to share.
He kept fucking his knot into her until eventually, it's too swollen to tug out of her. Then Y/N's hips started to move again, grinding down on the knot inside of her, and Felix knew from experience that it was pressing into all of the right places. It's when she's locked in place that she started to cum, and he realized that her moans were muffled because she had Hyunjin's shoulder between her teeth. She milked around his knot, soaking him, and his pretty groans filled up the room while she did it. Felix has to steel himself to not get hard again so soon, even though he knew he could just get on his knees and rest his dick against Hyunjin's plush mouth (he would immediately open it -- an oral fixation and the sheer pleasure in taking care of your pack mates goes a long way) -- he didn't want to be selfish. Why would he cum twice when Y/N had cum twice? She needed to be way ahead of them -- it was only fair.
Once they'd ridden the waves of their orgasms, breath caught, but still locked together, Y/N began to purr. Both Felix and Hyunjin make delighted coos in their throat when Felix snuggled closer to them, both Y/N and Hyunjin holding out an arm so that he could tuck against them. Her eyes were closed, and her hair was a mess -- the shirt she was wearing was rumpled and definitely needed to come off. There was fruit that needed to be eaten on the plate beside them, and water that needed to be drunk.
But her body was warm, and she needed her pseudo pack mates snuggled up against her while she was knotted, it seemed. So he ignored all of that for now in favor of cuddling closer for a while (not before taking a close-up of Hyunjin's face, still covered in slick).
They all fall asleep like that. Felix is unsure how long they'd been asleep, but he does wake up to murmured voices beside him.
"No, you," Hyunjin's voice is gentle, despite how demanding he sounded, "The fruit is for you, Petal, I don't need it."
"Yes," he heard rustling, then a muffled sound from Hyunjin, and a reluctant sigh and chewing, "We both need to eat."
Hyunjin swallows, "Yes, I know we both need to eat, but it's more important that --"
"Shhh," she cut him off, "Enough."
Felix finally peeked his eyes open, squinting against the light that was now filling the room. It was warm where the sun would splice to the curtains, but since they were typically in this room, overheating, they kept the bed tucked away in the corner to avoid it. So their corner of the room is relatively cool, with a fan pointed at the mattress and the ceiling fan whipping around the top of them. Y/N was still on top of Hyunjin, but he was no longer locked with her, though she still straddled him, just a little bit above his softened cock.
The plate of food is balanced on her palm: strawberries, orange slices, watermelon, peaches, and what appears to be an avocado. Her lips are wet and glossy like she'd been eating, but Y/N is also clearly making Hyunjin eat as well. His lips are red, glossy, and sticky. There's strawberry staining the corner of his lips that Felix wanted to lick off.
"Jinnie," Felix's voice is gravelly, deep, coming straight from his chest, "Is Y/N taking care of you well?"
Hyunjin turned to face him, "She's so good at taking care of me," he agreed, and Y/N smiled, a little purr humming from her chest, "I just wish she'd keep some more for herself." Then he grabbed the fork, taking it off the plate, piercing through the little slice of avocado. He took it to her mouth, "Here," he offered, but Y/N closed her lips and turned her face. Hyunjin frowned, "What? You don't like it?"
"Hmmm." Is all she said, plucking a piece of watermelon and pressing it into her mouth instead.
"Y'know, if Minho puts something on the plate he expects you to eat it, baby."
Y/N took the fork from Hyunjin, fooled both him and Felix into thinking that she was going to eat it, before placing it back on the plate. Felix chuckled, reached blindly for his phone, and then updated the group chat to let everyone know what was going on.
She grabbed for the water herself, drinking half of the bottle before pressing it to Hyunjin's mouth. Then, before Felix could pout that Hyunjin was getting all of the attention, she reached over and grabbed another water bottle. She's a little clumsy when she unmounted Hyunjin, and Felix got a glimpse of the mess on her thighs. She opened the water and pressed the nozzle to Felix's lips, and he laughed a little, but drank, even as the water dribbled down his chin, his jaw, his neck.
"Thank you," he smiled, eyes crinkling, and Y/N chased the droplets of water sliding down his throat with her tongue. Her scent sweetened like another wave of heat was coming, and the tip of her nose pressed against his throat, huffing him like a drug. "You're very sweet, aren't you? Taking care of everyone so well. What are you gonna do when there are 8 of us, hm? Are you gonna make sure everyone's well fed?"
She hummed softly, shivering before blindly reaching for his prick and finding him half hard. Those pretty fingers work him stiffer, and he lets his hands fit around her hips, squeezing tightly. She starts to mouth at his scent gland, and he pushes more of his scent out for her, letting it swell around them, vanilla and tangerines mixing pretty, Hyunjin's own cocoa bean-like scent adding to it. Felix thinks she wanted to get scent drunk, because she doesn't move from his neck, so he makes sure that she does.
This time, instead of letting her ride, Felix flipped them over. He pressed her legs up and slid through the mess of slick and cum to push inside of her. His mouth fell open, a shaky moan left him, and Y/N curled her legs around his hips. He fucked her slow and deep, rutting inside of her, driven by the little whimper-y sounds that leave her lips. Hyunjin let them go at it for a little while alone, before he snuck his fingers between their bodies and started to pull her shirt up. He murmured something about not wanting her to overheat as he tugged it over her head, tossing it somewhere in the nest, then settled at her side. Her tits were soft and supple; Hyunjin's hands cup the one closest to him, and he fits his lips over her nipple.
Y/N came like that, and Felix feels firsthand how she pulsed and squeezed around his prick. He made a sound similar to Hyunjin's cry out when he came before. And as much as he’d like to feel her milk him through his orgasm, Felix pulls out before he cums, only because he liked to watch it paint skin, and he needed to see it in the soft pubic hair that covered her mound. Hyunjin's hand replaced her pussy as he jerked him off messily until he was squirting over her, hitting some of her tummy. Hyunjin realized what Felix wanted, though, and tilted the tip down so that it hit her pussy instead.
He sat back on his heels, using one hand to comb the hair from his face, "Ah," he sighed, using his free hand to drag his thumb over the cum, smearing it into her skin, "So pretty." Y/N nibbled on her knuckles while he did it, legs splayed open for him.
Felix had leaned in, pushed kisses against her tummy, sucking marks into the tender skin. She's quiet again, still panting, warm from the heat sweltering her body, but purring. He's unsure how long he'd been licking and biting into her salty skin when she finally speaks again.
"Innie is home."
Felix and Hyunjin both perk their heads up, and ten seconds later, they hear the front door close. How Y/N knew he was here is beyond them, but there is very little time to question it. Jeongin came to the door almost immediately, knocking softly, and despite being the baby alpha who would be more driven on instinct than reason, he carefully pressed the door open.
"Can I come in, Noona?" He inquired, "Or do you want to be alone with Jinnie and Bokkie?"
Felix smiled -- he's so polite. Y/N blinked at him, nodding, then used her hand to pat the spot to her left where Felix had been sleeping. Now that he was on top of her, though, the space was free. Jeongin grinned, dimples and all, as he kicked off his shoes and wriggled his jean shorts off his legs. When he climbed into the nest, Y/N started struggling with the shirt he was wearing, peeling it off his body. Jeongin did that laugh when he let it out, then sucked it back in while he tried to help her, finally getting it over his head.
Y/N wrangled it into a ball and pressed it to her face, dropping her head back onto the pillow. Jeongin stretched out at her side, leaning his face into his palm while he watched her, "How has she been?"
"Good," Felix answers, "Very caring and affectionate."
"So not much different than her regularly then," he grinned, then ran the tip of his thumb along the side of her face, dragging it along the shell of her ear. She leaned into it -- Jeongin's hands must be cold from outside, so it should feel really good, "Noona, I'll do whatever you need, yeah? Knot you or just cuddle, I'll just be here for the taking."
Hyunjin whined at her side, his cheek pressed against her breast, looking extra soft, mushed up to it, "Heyyy, you never offer that to me."
"That's because you're a brat when you're rutting."
Hyunjin whined again, and this spurred her fingers back into his hair, petting idly. Jeongin continued his movements, tracing designs against her heated skin. He looked over to the nightstand and hummed softly, using his other hand to press Felix's hair from his face again. Felix had planted himself on her belly, much as she'd been doing with them leading up to her heat. It was comforting, he found, that she knew what she was doing.
"Guess force-feeding the avocado wasn't working, hm?" He commented, "Minho might scold you for that, aegi."
They all knew he wouldn't. Minho is much too soft on her already. But Felix and Hyunjin, however, would surely be getting scolded.
He just hopes it's in a fun way.
Jeongin
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everyone wore themselves out before I got here
Jisung
i get why we aren't putting her in pictures but it feels like gatekeeping
can I see the top of her head please
or her ear
or eyeball like zoomed in 😣😭
Seungmin
Please, not this again, I need to focus
Jisung
wait is that my shirt on the pillow next to her head
