bucky just absolutely drilling your shit and you’re being so loud but he’s kinda shy about it oh my god
Bucky had you bent over the edge of the mattress, chest pressed into the rumpled sheets, ass up and thighs trembling as he drove into you from behind.
The room was filthy with sound.
Wet skin slapping together. The creak of the old bedframe. Your broken moans echoing off the walls every single time he buried himself deep enough to punch the air from your lungs.
He was relentless.
Every thrust shoved you forward across the mattress, cock stretching you open so perfectly it bordered on too much. Thick. Deep. Unforgiving in the best possible way.
“Fuck—Bucky!” you cried, voice cracking around his name when he hit that spot inside you again.
Your fingers clawed helplessly at the sheets.
You couldn’t stop the noises spilling out of you. Every stroke dragged another shameless sound from your throat—high, needy, wrecked.
Behind you, Bucky faltered for half a second.
His hips stuttered.
“Baby… Jesus,” he muttered under his breath, voice rough with strain.
His metal hand tightened around your hip while his other slid up your spine uncertainly, fingers flexing like he didn’t know what to do with himself.
“You’re so loud,” he rasped. “The neighbors—”
“Don’t care,” you gasped immediately, pushing back against him desperately. “Harder. Please—”
That completely destroyed him.
Bucky groaned low in his chest before snapping his hips forward harder, giving you exactly what you asked for. The force of it knocked a loud cry from your throat, your whole body jolting from the impact.
“Shhh—fuck, doll,” he hissed, though there was no real warning in it.
Just embarrassment.
That shy little edge in his voice that always surfaced when he realized exactly how much noise he could pull from you.
It would’ve been adorable if it wasn’t so fucking hot.
His metal fingers dug deeper into your hip, almost bruising, while he kept pounding into you at that brutal pace. Each thrust dragged another wet moan from your lips.
He leaned over you suddenly, broad chest covering your back.
His stubble scraped your shoulder as he pressed closer, trying to hide you beneath him while his flesh hand slid around to cover your mouth.
“Gotta quiet down,” he whispered against your ear, voice husky with restraint. “Can’t have the whole block knowing I’m fucking you like this.”
The words only made you louder.
A muffled whimper vibrated against his palm as he thrust deep again, cock dragging perfectly against that sensitive spot inside you.
Your legs shook violently.
Slick sounds filled the room every time he bottomed out, your arousal coating his thighs and dripping down your own.
Bucky cursed softly against the back of your neck.
“You’re killin’ me here,” he groaned. “So goddamn loud… and so wet. Shit.”
His hips slowed for one deep grind instead of a thrust, forcing you to feel every inch of him buried inside you.
Pleasure hit so hard it bordered on painful.
You sobbed against his hand.
“Fuck,” he whispered shakily.
Then he pulled his hand away just enough for you to gasp in air—and immediately cry out again when he picked up speed.
The headboard started knocking against the wall in a punishing rhythm.
“Buck—Bucky, oh my god—right there—”
“Quiet, sweetheart,” he begged, but his own voice cracked with arousal.
His face was burning hot where it pressed into your hair.
The terrifying Winter Soldier—the man who could dismantle a room full of enemies without blinking—was somehow shy about how loud he made you in bed.
You loved it.
So you deliberately moaned louder on the next thrust.
Bucky choked on a breath behind you.
“You’re doing this on purpose,” he growled, though there was a breathless laugh tangled in the words.
His arm slid beneath your stomach suddenly, hauling you upward so your back arched deeper.
The new angle was devastating.
He drilled into you harder immediately, each stroke punching stars behind your eyelids.
“Yes—fuck, yes!”
The cry tore out of you loud enough that you were positive the neighbors could hear every word.
Your walls fluttered around him as your orgasm started building hard and fast.
Bucky made a helpless sound.
Then his hand returned to your mouth—except this time two fingers slipped between your lips.
“Suck,” he whispered.
Shy voice.
Commanding tone.
You moaned around his fingers obediently while he kept railing you from behind, hips snapping forward with brutal precision.
The wet sounds in the room were obscene now.
Your muffled cries.
His uneven breathing.
The slick drag of his cock driving into you over and over again.
Bucky was losing control.
You could feel it in the way his thrusts turned erratic—deeper, rougher, desperate for the way your body clenched around him.
“You feel so good,” he rasped into your ear. “So tight. So loud for me. Fuck… shouldn’t like it this much…”
That did it.
Your orgasm hit like a wave.
Your entire body seized as you came with a scream that his fingers barely managed to muffle. Your pussy pulsed hard around him, milking him while your legs nearly gave out beneath you.
Bucky groaned brokenly behind you, hips stuttering as he fucked you through it anyway, dragging the orgasm out until you were shaking.
Only then did he finally ease you down onto the mattress.
But he didn’t pull out.
Instead, he followed you down completely, covering your body with his own while staying buried deep inside you.
Slow rolls of his hips replaced the punishing thrusts from before, keeping the pleasure simmering low in your stomach while you both fought to catch your breath.
“Gonna be the death of me,” he murmured softly against your temple before pressing a kiss there.
His voice had gone bashful again.
Sweet.
“Can’t believe how loud you get,” he admitted. “Makes me crazy.”
You turned your head enough to grin at him despite how completely wrecked you felt.
“Good,” you whispered. “Want the whole world to know what you do to me, Sergeant.”
Bucky groaned immediately and buried his burning face into your neck.
But his hips still gave one firm, possessive thrust anyway.
You moaned again—quieter this time, but not quiet enough.
“Baby…” he warned weakly, half laughing, half desperate.
AN: Sadly we're going to have to do away with the taglist as Tumblr has terminated my account twice over the span of an hour for tagging folks in the comments. As deeply frustrating as this is I prefer to keep my blog active so moving forward I guess just make sure you're following the blog for updates or turn on notifications.
Summary: Once a year Brendon always ends up back at the aquarium.
SET AFTER:
Rockstar - Brendon Park meets his match against PTMC's fiery new attending.
Pussy Wagon - A spilled drink leads you to see a different side of your nemesis Park The Shark.
The First Time (NSFW) - Fireworks aren't the only explosive thing happening at Jesse's Fourth of July party.
A Loaded Gun (NSFW) - Hate sex has never been so fucking hot...
The Game - Brendon finds himself breaking his own rules when it comes to you.
Pittfest -Brendon comforts you when you fall apart after the events of Pittfest.
Is He Prettier Than Me? - Brandon gets curious when he learns you have other plans.
The Drawer - Brendon realises your relationship may be shifting when he discovers he has a drawer at your place.
Scrunchies - Scrunchies… they’re the downfall of Brendon Park.
Love Games (NSFW) - Brendon and you love to play games, especially with each other.
An Exquisite Form of Torture (NSFW) - Brendon continues to turn up the heat as he holds you captive.
THAT Guy - Brendon is forced to face up to his feelings for you when he finds out your meeting up with an ex.
Seven Days - Seven days is far too long to go without you...
Save It - A thirty six hour shift leads to another admission about your relationship with Brendon.
Doctor Dick - Brendon's day takes a turn when Whitaker gives him some critical information.
A Manipulative Fuck - You and Brendon discuss what happened with your ex.
The Call (NSFW) - Brendon decides to put a stop to David's calls once and for all.
The One That Hates The Ravens - David's attempt at revenge backfires spectacularly.
The Lovin Spoonful - You wake up to an unexpected surprise.
Delete, Block, Rinse, Repeat - A series of cryptic messages force Brendon to confront a secret he's been keeping for almost a decade.
His Father's Son - Brendon reflects on the past as he debates taking that first sip of whiskey.
The Cost of Dignity - Brendon's greatest secret comes with a cost.
A Kiss For Luck - Brendon struggles to navigate working at the hospital after the release of THAT video.
The Craziest Fucking Thing - You take matters into your own hands after receiving bad news from Brendon.
Ride Or Die - You wake up to the sound of an angry blender after Brendon discovers what happened with Rowena.
PREQUEL TO:
Diamonds (NSFW) - A bet leads to naughty shenanigans in a five star restaurant.
The Call Out - Brendon's focus on wedding planning is disrupted when he's called out to the scene of a multi-car pile up.
Good Hands - Abbot reminds Brendon you're in good hands as they proceed with the amputation.
Flayed - Brendon's world crashes down as he learns the truth about the accident.
Ten Things I Love About You - Brendon discovers a pink envelope in the pocket of the jacket you were wearing at the time of the accident.
The Parent Trap - Brendon faces your parents, leading to a surprise revelation.
Sledgehammer - Brendon struggles to cope in the aftermath of everything that's happened.
Et Tu Marianne? - Your mother throws Brendon under the bus after you wake up from surgery.
The Fucking Patient - Abbot has some harsh words for Brendon regarding your care.
Chemistry - You and Brendon finally have a moment alone to talk.
A Serial Absconder - Your habit of disappearing leads to a healing journey Brendon doesn't expect.
Every year on the third of October Brendon visits the Pittsburgh Zoo & Aquarium. He walks past the lions, the tigers, the giraffes and the elephants, heading straight towards the huge glass tunnel that houses the sharks. He spends a couple of hours there watching the blacktips and the zebras swim overhead, roaming the tunnel back and before he leaves and clocks in for an evening shift at the PTMC.
This year though, this year it’s different.
It’s the first time he’s brought you to the aquarium, and instead of wandering the tunnel alone lost in his thoughts, he finds himself with explaining all the silly little details he’s come to learn throughout the years about the creatures that captured his son’s heart.
“Toby forced me to learn everything about these things.” He reveals as you stand in the centre of the tunnel with your head tilted back, watching a tiger shark swim it’s way over you. The expression on your face is one of wonderment and it takes him back to the days he used to come here with his son, his tiny hand reaching up as if to stroke its belly. “We’d lie in our sleeping bags on the floor of our living room, watching the discovery channel documentaries until he fell asleep.”
He smiles affectionately at the thought, a dull ache blossoming in his chest. Memories like this, they used to hurt all the time when he was alone. Now they’re things he can look on fondly. Snapshots of the time he had with his son, instead of mourning the loss. “He used to love just watching the big sharks and the little sharks swim together, he used to point them out and say ‘look daddy, it’s us’.”
“He sounds like a very special little boy.” Your fingers entwining with his as you continue your journey through the tunnel, the water shimmering as the sharks glide past.
“He was.” Brendon says, clearing his throat against the ball of emotion that’s unspooling in his chest. “He was the very best kid but then again I’m biased.”
Your lips tug up into a smile, and that pain it’s replaced with something else. Sharing these parts of himself with you, it heals him in a way he couldn’t fathom before. He always thought he was honouring his son by keeping his memories held close to his chest but he realises now that he was grieving, that they were too big to process so he locked them away. Then you barged in right into his life in that bossy way of yours and jammed the key into the lock, and now…
Now he can talk about his kid again.
“There’s something I have to do before we leave.” He tells you, tilting his head towards the donor wall. Empathy and understanding cross your features as you squeeze his hand before letting go.
“Take your time.” You say before jerking your thumb back towards the tunnel. “I’m kinda digging the vibe in there so I’m going to do another walk through. You know where I am if you need me.”
He waits until you’ve disappeared into the shark infested waters before he faces the plagues lining the donor wall. Toby’s used to be the only one but now it’s a collection of cast bronze with dozens of names etched into them. It brings him comfort to know that is son is amongst friends in that way, that he’s probably talking the ear off other shark enthusiasts.
He finds his own plague, the one he had made almost a decade ago. It’s been well maintained over the years, cleaned daily. He appreciates that more than he can admit. It means that Toby hasn’t been forgotten that he’s still as treasured as the days he walked these halls spouting off facts.
His fingertips run over the letters, tracing over the carvings as he smiles softly at the words.
In loving memory of Tobias Park – the original Baby Shark.
“Happy Birthday, kid.” He whispers, his voice barely more than a rasp as his eyes start to prick. “Daddy still misses you every single day.”
Like My Work? - Tip your friendly fan fic writer here!
AN: Sadly we're going to have to do away with the taglist as Tumblr has terminated my account twice over the span of an hour for tagging folks in the comments. As deeply frustrating as this is I prefer to keep my blog active so moving forward I guess just make sure you're following the blog for updates or turn on notifcations.
Summary: Joe tries to reach out when he realises you're struggling with the time you spent undercover.
Companion piece to:
Cuffs (NSFW) - Joe doesn’t want a one night stand… not with you.
Dress Blues - Joe is forced to dress up for his meeting with the commissoner.
Joe Fucking Hill - You’re there for Joe when he has a crisis of identity.
Good Girl (NSFW) - You’re not always such a good girl.
Downpour - Joe has something very important he needs to say to you.
Fight Night - The one thing Joe can’t stand is people talking shit about you.
The Details - Joe returns home to find you in bed after a long undercover op.
The Rat - You take matters into your own hands when someone breaks into your apartment.
Joe doesn’t realise you’re having nightmares. Not until he wakes up at 3am to discover you gone from the bedsheets beside him and your running shoes missing. He sighs as he stares at the vacant space next to his boots. He used to go running too when the bad dreams came, he’d spend his nights pounding pavement, music turned up to the point where he didn’t have to think.
Undercover ops…
They do a lot of good for NYPD, taking down dangerous criminals, disbanding malevolent organisations but they erode the people who undertake them. They scratch off the shine of who they used to be, leaving behind someone else, someone different.
Joe, he gets that, he’s lived it. Hell, he expected it when you walked back through the door after six months UC, but the thing is… he doesn’t think you did. He doesn’t think you expected all the little changes that alter your psyche when you become someone else. The mundane elements like your new routine, the way you take your coffee, the fact you sleep with the door just the tiniest bit a jar so you can hear a footstep in the hall.
He doesn’t think you accounted for any of those things.
He’s waiting for you, when you get back. Sitting at the kitchen table, sipping hot chocolate just like his mom used to make when he couldn’t sleep. He uses the tips of his fingers to push your own mug towards you when you take a seat across from him. You wrap your palm around it, cradling it to your chest as you wait for him to speak.
“You don’t need to run from me.” He says softly into the space between you. “You don’t have to hide what you’ve been through, I’ve been there, I know…”
He trails off, his lips pursing together into a sympathetic line as he reaches for your hand. His thumb skims over the bruised knuckles you came home with from your time away, his eyes land on the cut that’s healing on your cheek, the vibrant colours fading now as the dawn breaks through the window of the kitchen.
“When you’re ready, I want to hear it.” He tells you as you look away, your jaw line quivering. “I want you to tell me everything you’ve been through over the past six months.”
Like My Work? - Tip your friendly fan fic writer here!
AN: Sadly we're going to have to do away with the taglist as Tumblr has terminated my account twice over the span of an hour for tagging folks in the comments. As deeply frustrating as this is I prefer to keep my blog active so moving forward I guess just make sure you're following the blog for updates or turn on notifcations.
Summary: Your habit of disappearing leads to a healing journey Brendon doesn't expect.
SET AFTER:
Rockstar - Brendon Park meets his match against PTMC's fiery new attending.
Pussy Wagon - A spilled drink leads you to see a different side of your nemesis Park The Shark.
The First Time (NSFW) - Fireworks aren't the only explosive thing happening at Jesse's Fourth of July party.
A Loaded Gun (NSFW) - Hate sex has never been so fucking hot...
The Game - Brendon finds himself breaking his own rules when it comes to you.
Pittfest -Brendon comforts you when you fall apart after the events of Pittfest.
Is He Prettier Than Me? - Brandon gets curious when he learns you have other plans.
The Drawer - Brendon realises your relationship may be shifting when he discovers he has a drawer at your place.
Scrunchies - Scrunchies… they’re the downfall of Brendon Park.
Love Games (NSFW) - Brendon and you love to play games, especially with each other.
An Exquisite Form of Torture (NSFW) - Brendon continues to turn up the heat as he holds you captive.
THAT Guy - Brendon is forced to face up to his feelings for you when he finds out your meeting up with an ex.
Seven Days - Seven days is far too long to go without you...
Save It - A thirty six hour shift leads to another admission about your relationship with Brendon.
Doctor Dick - Brendon's day takes a turn when Whitaker gives him some critical information.
A Manipulative Fuck - You and Brendon discuss what happened with your ex.
The Call (NSFW) - Brendon decides to put a stop to David's calls once and for all.
The One That Hates The Ravens - David's attempt at revenge backfires spectacularly.
The Lovin Spoonful - You wake up to an unexpected surprise.
Delete, Block, Rinse, Repeat - A series of cryptic messages force Brendon to confront a secret he's been keeping for almost a decade.
His Father's Son - Brendon reflects on the past as he debates taking that first sip of whiskey.
The Cost of Dignity - Brendon's greatest secret comes with a cost.
A Kiss For Luck - Brendon struggles to navigate working at the hospital after the release of THAT video.
The Craziest Fucking Thing - You take matters into your own hands after receiving bad news from Brendon.
Ride Or Die - You wake up to the sound of an angry blender after Brendon discovers what happened with Rowena.
Diamonds (NSFW) - A bet leads to naughty shenanigans in a five star restaurant.
The Call Out - Brendon's focus on wedding planning is disrupted when he's called out to the scene of a multi-car pile up.
Good Hands - Abbot reminds Brendon you're in good hands as they proceed with the amputation.
Flayed - Brendon's world crashes down as he learns the truth about the accident.
Ten Things I Love About You - Brendon discovers a pink envelope in the pocket of the jacket you were wearing at the time of the accident.
The Parent Trap - Brendon faces your parents, leading to a surprise revelation.
Sledgehammer - Brendon struggles to cope in the aftermath of everything that's happened.
Et Tu Marianne? - Your mother throws Brendon under the bus after you wake up from surgery.
The Fucking Patient - Abbot has some harsh words for Brendon regarding your care.
Chemistry - You and Brendon finally have a moment alone to talk.
Ten days post op and you’ve become a serial absconder.
Brendon’s lost track of the number of times he’s dropped by your room between surgeries to find your bed empty and a pink post it note on your pillow. You should be completely tuckered out after your morning physio sessions but instead, you’re driving the nurses crazy with your disappearing acts.
The interesting part is you have accomplices. People who understand you need enrichment activities in order to function.
Robby and Jesse sneaking you out to play with Trouble in the memorial garden.
Whitaker whisking you away to the gift shop for new books.
Abbot leading you up to the eighth floor for the wheelchair races that he thinks Brendon doesn’t know about. It’s why you have a small stack of cash sitting alongside your bed, Abbot doesn’t use a wheelchair too often anymore, he’s got a little rusty with the manoeuvrability.
“Who broke her out today?” He asks Michelle, the nurse on duty for overseeing the ward during the handover period. He’s just finished up a Shoulder Arthroscopy and has an hour before his ACL Reconstruction.
“Garcia this time.” Michelle informs him, rubbing an agitated hand across her forehead. She seems to be the most irritated by your antics. “The Whitakers had their baby a couple of hours ago, and she wanted to see if they needed anything. I thought she would have texted you.”
That is big news. Huge news in fact. He knows the Whitakers don’t have any family in the city, that Dennis barely speaks to his folks back home in Nebraska except his brother Rick, and Lola was a ward of the system before striking out on her own. Their support network is a patchwork of friends they’ve made along the way, a found family just like his.
“My phones in my locker.” Brendon tells her, waving his hand dismissively at her snarky tone. He hates the way she doesn’t use your name, it’s always a harsh she whenever they talk about your wellbeing and it’s really starting to piss him off. “I just wanted to check in and see how physio went, but I think I’ll take a trip down to maternity ward, see how baby Whitaker is doing.”
“Doctor Park.” Michelle calls out as he pushes away from the desk. “I was sorry to hear about the wedding…if you need to talk about it…”
“Then I’ll talk to my fiancée.” Brendon snorts as he strides away without so much as a backwards glance.
There have been several offers like this since news got around the two of you called off the wedding. There’s a theory that the two of you are hurtling towards a breakup, that he’s only sticking around long enough for you to get back on your feet before he takes off for greener pastures. The thought of it is absolutely abhorrent to the man who spends his evenings catching the game in your room or fighting over what movie to watch and trying not to spill popcorn onto your bed.
It leaves a bad taste in his mouth as he takes the elevator up to the maternity ward. He’s just about managed to shake it off by the time he gets the Whitaker’s room number from the ward administrator. The door is open when he swings through it, but fledging parents are nowhere to be found, instead there you are, wheelchair drawn up alongside a plastic bassinette, watching over the tiny person swaddled up inside.
“Dennis is helping Lola take a shower.” You explain, never taking your eyes off the bundle of joy nestled in her blanket. “She looks just like him doesn’t she? She’s got Lola’s hair but those eyes…”
“They’re farmboi all the way.” Brendon agrees as he crosses his arms over his chest. There’s an ache in heart, a dull pain that makes it hard to breath as he watches you with the baby. “What did they name her?”
“Mia.” You say and he swallows past the lump in his throat as he stares down at the child. She stares back, those vivid blue eyes fixating on him as her tiny lips smack together. She starts to fuss and something in Brendon’s chest cracks at the sound. It’s so familiar to the one Toby used to make, but so different too.
“Do you think… do you think they’d be ok with me holding her?” He asks softly as those cries get louder, grating against his nerves.
“She’s been passed around like a football over the past few hours, I’m sure they’ll be fine with it.” You say, scooting your chair back a couple of inches to give him some space.
He reaches into the bassinet, drawing the tiny bundle into his arms. She’s lighter than Toby was, his boy has been a heavy baby just like him. Mia settles almost immediately, her ear pressed to the thrum of his heart as it beats wildly in his chest.
“I thought this would be a lot harder than it is.” He admits, shifting so that he’s supporting the baby’s head better in the crook of his elbow. “I stayed away from kids for a long time after Toby… this feels ok, it feels…good.”
“I’d be careful wielding that baby. Don’t want all of those nurses that are trying to get into your pants heads exploding at the thought of playing happy families with you.” You tease as he sits down on the edge of the bed so that the two of you are on a similar level.
The fact you’ve clocked that doesn’t surprise him, but it does infuriate him because he finds it so fucking disrespectful that they treat you as if you aren’t there while they’re doing it. You seem to be taking it in your stride through. He isn’t sure if it’s the faith you have in him, or the fact you have bigger things to worry about.
Your fingertip smooths over Mia’s delicate cheek and she smacks her lips together, bubbles appearing across them. “I can’t believe they made such a tiny person.”
“Rae, I know we talked about this but… does this change anything for you?” He says, thinking back to the look in your eyes when he first walked in. There was such a tenderness in your expression, a love he never saw from Rowena even with their own son. “I know I’ve had a vasectomy but there are other options if you’ve changed your mind-”
“No.” A soft smile plays across your features as you look down at Mia. “I think being god mother to this little one will be enough for me… that and you know… the dog we’ll be getting when I heal up since Trouble wants to stick with his dog daddies.”
“Yes, Trouble is proving hard to lure over to the dark side.” Brendon sighs thinking of his Godpuppy. He’d brought a lot of joy to your lives even before the accident, and now that the house is almost finished, the two of you will definitely have the space for an additional furry family member. “He’s Robby and Jesse’s baby through and through.”
“You are very cute though Mia…” You console the child in his arms. “Oh, she’s making a face…”
“That’s because she’s pooping.” Brandon informs you, his nose wrinkling as the smell hits him. “Christ, I do not miss that.”
You roll your chair back as Whitaker steps through the door. Lola’s arm is threaded through his as he supports her back to the bed. She looks almost rejuvenated after her shower, her gaze comes to rest on the baby in Brendon’s arms as he holds her out towards her father.
“Just in time.” Brendon says handing Mia over. Whitaker takes her with a special kind of gentleness, one that Brendon remembers from his own experiences as a first-time dad. “She’s ready for her first diaper change. I can help if you’re not sure. The first time I did Toby’s…”
He trails off, the words dying on his tongue. He senses Whitaker’s confusion before the reality dawns on him. After what happened with Rowena and that video everybody knows he had a son, that he passed away before he got to live a full, meaningful life.
“Yeah.” Whitaker says as he looks up at Brendon, the edges of his mouth tipping up into a smile. “I think we could use all the help we can get.”
Like My Work? - Tip your friendly fan fic writer here!
I mean.. I completely understand what Rae's cabin fever, I feel like in her position I would also have accomplices to help me escape, especially if nurse ratchett in there is being a judgey bish without knowing the full story (ง •̀_•́)ง
AN: Sadly we're going to have to do away with the taglist as Tumblr has terminated my account twice over the span of an hour for tagging folks in the comments. As deeply frustrating as this is I prefer to keep my blog active so moving forward I guess just make sure you're following the blog for updates or turn on notifcations.
Summary: Your habit of disappearing leads to a healing journey Brendon doesn't expect.
SET AFTER:
Rockstar - Brendon Park meets his match against PTMC's fiery new attending.
Pussy Wagon - A spilled drink leads you to see a different side of your nemesis Park The Shark.
The First Time (NSFW) - Fireworks aren't the only explosive thing happening at Jesse's Fourth of July party.
A Loaded Gun (NSFW) - Hate sex has never been so fucking hot...
The Game - Brendon finds himself breaking his own rules when it comes to you.
Pittfest -Brendon comforts you when you fall apart after the events of Pittfest.
Is He Prettier Than Me? - Brandon gets curious when he learns you have other plans.
The Drawer - Brendon realises your relationship may be shifting when he discovers he has a drawer at your place.
Scrunchies - Scrunchies… they’re the downfall of Brendon Park.
Love Games (NSFW) - Brendon and you love to play games, especially with each other.
An Exquisite Form of Torture (NSFW) - Brendon continues to turn up the heat as he holds you captive.
THAT Guy - Brendon is forced to face up to his feelings for you when he finds out your meeting up with an ex.
Seven Days - Seven days is far too long to go without you...
Save It - A thirty six hour shift leads to another admission about your relationship with Brendon.
Doctor Dick - Brendon's day takes a turn when Whitaker gives him some critical information.
A Manipulative Fuck - You and Brendon discuss what happened with your ex.
The Call (NSFW) - Brendon decides to put a stop to David's calls once and for all.
The One That Hates The Ravens - David's attempt at revenge backfires spectacularly.
The Lovin Spoonful - You wake up to an unexpected surprise.
Delete, Block, Rinse, Repeat - A series of cryptic messages force Brendon to confront a secret he's been keeping for almost a decade.
His Father's Son - Brendon reflects on the past as he debates taking that first sip of whiskey.
The Cost of Dignity - Brendon's greatest secret comes with a cost.
A Kiss For Luck - Brendon struggles to navigate working at the hospital after the release of THAT video.
The Craziest Fucking Thing - You take matters into your own hands after receiving bad news from Brendon.
Ride Or Die - You wake up to the sound of an angry blender after Brendon discovers what happened with Rowena.
Diamonds (NSFW) - A bet leads to naughty shenanigans in a five star restaurant.
The Call Out - Brendon's focus on wedding planning is disrupted when he's called out to the scene of a multi-car pile up.
Good Hands - Abbot reminds Brendon you're in good hands as they proceed with the amputation.
Flayed - Brendon's world crashes down as he learns the truth about the accident.
Ten Things I Love About You - Brendon discovers a pink envelope in the pocket of the jacket you were wearing at the time of the accident.
The Parent Trap - Brendon faces your parents, leading to a surprise revelation.
Sledgehammer - Brendon struggles to cope in the aftermath of everything that's happened.
Et Tu Marianne? - Your mother throws Brendon under the bus after you wake up from surgery.
The Fucking Patient - Abbot has some harsh words for Brendon regarding your care.
Chemistry - You and Brendon finally have a moment alone to talk.
Ten days post op and you’ve become a serial absconder.
Brendon’s lost track of the number of times he’s dropped by your room between surgeries to find your bed empty and a pink post it note on your pillow. You should be completely tuckered out after your morning physio sessions but instead, you’re driving the nurses crazy with your disappearing acts.
The interesting part is you have accomplices. People who understand you need enrichment activities in order to function.
Robby and Jesse sneaking you out to play with Trouble in the memorial garden.
Whitaker whisking you away to the gift shop for new books.
Abbot leading you up to the eighth floor for the wheelchair races that he thinks Brendon doesn’t know about. It’s why you have a small stack of cash sitting alongside your bed, Abbot doesn’t use a wheelchair too often anymore, he’s got a little rusty with the manoeuvrability.
“Who broke her out today?” He asks Michelle, the nurse on duty for overseeing the ward during the handover period. He’s just finished up a Shoulder Arthroscopy and has an hour before his ACL Reconstruction.
“Garcia this time.” Michelle informs him, rubbing an agitated hand across her forehead. She seems to be the most irritated by your antics. “The Whitakers had their baby a couple of hours ago, and she wanted to see if they needed anything. I thought she would have texted you.”
That is big news. Huge news in fact. He knows the Whitakers don’t have any family in the city, that Dennis barely speaks to his folks back home in Nebraska except his brother Rick, and Lola was a ward of the system before striking out on her own. Their support network is a patchwork of friends they’ve made along the way, a found family just like his.
“My phones in my locker.” Brendon tells her, waving his hand dismissively at her snarky tone. He hates the way she doesn’t use your name, it’s always a harsh she whenever they talk about your wellbeing and it’s really starting to piss him off. “I just wanted to check in and see how physio went, but I think I’ll take a trip down to maternity ward, see how baby Whitaker is doing.”
“Doctor Park.” Michelle calls out as he pushes away from the desk. “I was sorry to hear about the wedding…if you need to talk about it…”
“Then I’ll talk to my fiancée.” Brendon snorts as he strides away without so much as a backwards glance.
There have been several offers like this since news got around the two of you called off the wedding. There’s a theory that the two of you are hurtling towards a breakup, that he’s only sticking around long enough for you to get back on your feet before he takes off for greener pastures. The thought of it is absolutely abhorrent to the man who spends his evenings catching the game in your room or fighting over what movie to watch and trying not to spill popcorn onto your bed.
It leaves a bad taste in his mouth as he takes the elevator up to the maternity ward. He’s just about managed to shake it off by the time he gets the Whitaker’s room number from the ward administrator. The door is open when he swings through it, but fledging parents are nowhere to be found, instead there you are, wheelchair drawn up alongside a plastic bassinette, watching over the tiny person swaddled up inside.
“Dennis is helping Lola take a shower.” You explain, never taking your eyes off the bundle of joy nestled in her blanket. “She looks just like him doesn’t she? She’s got Lola’s hair but those eyes…”
“They’re farmboi all the way.” Brendon agrees as he crosses his arms over his chest. There’s an ache in heart, a dull pain that makes it hard to breath as he watches you with the baby. “What did they name her?”
“Mia.” You say and he swallows past the lump in his throat as he stares down at the child. She stares back, those vivid blue eyes fixating on him as her tiny lips smack together. She starts to fuss and something in Brendon’s chest cracks at the sound. It’s so familiar to the one Toby used to make, but so different too.
“Do you think… do you think they’d be ok with me holding her?” He asks softly as those cries get louder, grating against his nerves.
“She’s been passed around like a football over the past few hours, I’m sure they’ll be fine with it.” You say, scooting your chair back a couple of inches to give him some space.
He reaches into the bassinet, drawing the tiny bundle into his arms. She’s lighter than Toby was, his boy has been a heavy baby just like him. Mia settles almost immediately, her ear pressed to the thrum of his heart as it beats wildly in his chest.
“I thought this would be a lot harder than it is.” He admits, shifting so that he’s supporting the baby’s head better in the crook of his elbow. “I stayed away from kids for a long time after Toby… this feels ok, it feels…good.”
“I’d be careful wielding that baby. Don’t want all of those nurses that are trying to get into your pants heads exploding at the thought of playing happy families with you.” You tease as he sits down on the edge of the bed so that the two of you are on a similar level.
The fact you’ve clocked that doesn’t surprise him, but it does infuriate him because he finds it so fucking disrespectful that they treat you as if you aren’t there while they’re doing it. You seem to be taking it in your stride through. He isn’t sure if it’s the faith you have in him, or the fact you have bigger things to worry about.
Your fingertip smooths over Mia’s delicate cheek and she smacks her lips together, bubbles appearing across them. “I can’t believe they made such a tiny person.”
“Rae, I know we talked about this but… does this change anything for you?” He says, thinking back to the look in your eyes when he first walked in. There was such a tenderness in your expression, a love he never saw from Rowena even with their own son. “I know I’ve had a vasectomy but there are other options if you’ve changed your mind-”
“No.” A soft smile plays across your features as you look down at Mia. “I think being god mother to this little one will be enough for me… that and you know… the dog we’ll be getting when I heal up since Trouble wants to stick with his dog daddies.”
“Yes, Trouble is proving hard to lure over to the dark side.” Brendon sighs thinking of his Godpuppy. He’d brought a lot of joy to your lives even before the accident, and now that the house is almost finished, the two of you will definitely have the space for an additional furry family member. “He’s Robby and Jesse’s baby through and through.”
“You are very cute though Mia…” You console the child in his arms. “Oh, she’s making a face…”
“That’s because she’s pooping.” Brandon informs you, his nose wrinkling as the smell hits him. “Christ, I do not miss that.”
You roll your chair back as Whitaker steps through the door. Lola’s arm is threaded through his as he supports her back to the bed. She looks almost rejuvenated after her shower, her gaze comes to rest on the baby in Brendon’s arms as he holds her out towards her father.
“Just in time.” Brendon says handing Mia over. Whitaker takes her with a special kind of gentleness, one that Brendon remembers from his own experiences as a first-time dad. “She’s ready for her first diaper change. I can help if you’re not sure. The first time I did Toby’s…”
He trails off, the words dying on his tongue. He senses Whitaker’s confusion before the reality dawns on him. After what happened with Rowena and that video everybody knows he had a son, that he passed away before he got to live a full, meaningful life.
“Yeah.” Whitaker says as he looks up at Brendon, the edges of his mouth tipping up into a smile. “I think we could use all the help we can get.”
Like My Work? - Tip your friendly fan fic writer here!
I mean.. I completely understand what Rae's cabin fever, I feel like in her position I would also have accomplices to help me escape, especially if nurse ratchett in there is being a judgey bish without knowing the full story (ง •̀_•́)ง
The Best the Ravens Have Ever Looked: Brendon Park x Reader (NSFW)
AN: Sadly we're going to have to do away with the taglist as Tumblr has terminated my account twice over the span of an hour for tagging folks in the comments. As deeply frustrating as this is I prefer to keep my blog active so moving forward I guess just make sure you're following the blog for updates or turn on notifications.
Summary: Brendon has a real problem with your shorts.
SET AFTER:
Rockstar - Brendon Park meets his match against PTMC's fiery new attending.
Pussy Wagon - A spilled drink leads you to see a different side of your nemesis Park The Shark.
The First Time (NSFW) - Fireworks aren't the only explosive thing happening at Jesse's Fourth of July party.
A Loaded Gun (NSFW) - Hate sex has never been so fucking hot...
The Game - Brendon finds himself breaking his own rules when it comes to you.
Pittfest -Brendon comforts you when you fall apart after the events of Pittfest.
Is He Prettier Than Me? - Brandon gets curious when he learns you have other plans.
The Drawer - Brendon realises your relationship may be shifting when he discovers he has a drawer at your place.
Scrunchies - Scrunchies… they’re the downfall of Brendon Park.
Love Games (NSFW) - Brendon and you love to play games, especially with each other.
An Exquisite Form of Torture (NSFW) - Brendon continues to turn up the heat as he holds you captive.
THAT Guy - Brendon is forced to face up to his feelings for you when he finds out your meeting up with an ex.
Seven Days - Seven days is far too long to go without you...
Save It - A thirty six hour shift leads to another admission about your relationship with Brendon.
Doctor Dick - Brendon's day takes a turn when Whitaker gives him some critical information.
A Manipulative Fuck - You and Brendon discuss what happened with your ex.
The Call (NSFW) - Brendon decides to put a stop to David's calls once and for all.
The One That Hates The Ravens - David's attempt at revenge backfires spectacularly.
The Lovin Spoonful - You wake up to an unexpected surprise.
Delete, Block, Rinse, Repeat - A series of cryptic messages force Brendon to confront a secret he's been keeping for almost a decade.
His Father's Son - Brendon reflects on the past as he debates taking that first sip of whiskey.
The Cost of Dignity - Brendon's greatest secret comes with a cost.
A Kiss For Luck - Brendon struggles to navigate working at the hospital after the release of THAT video.
The Craziest Fucking Thing - You take matters into your own hands after receiving bad news from Brendon.
Ride Or Die - You wake up to the sound of an angry blender after Brendon discovers what happened with Rowena.
Diamonds (NSFW) - A bet leads to naughty shenanigans in a five star restaurant.
The Call Out - Brendon's focus on wedding planning is disrupted when he's called out to the scene of a multi-car pile up.
Good Hands - Abbot reminds Brendon you're in good hands as they proceed with the amputation.
Flayed - Brendon's world crashes down as he learns the truth about the accident.
Ten Things I Love About You - Brendon discovers a pink envelope in the pocket of the jacket you were wearing at the time of the accident.
The Parent Trap - Brendon faces your parents, leading to a surprise revelation.
Sledgehammer - Brendon struggles to cope in the aftermath of everything that's happened.
Et Tu Marianne? - Your mother throws Brendon under the bus after you wake up from surgery.
The Fucking Patient - Abbot has some harsh words for Brendon regarding your care.
Chemistry - You and Brendon finally have a moment alone to talk.
A Serial Absconder - Your habit of disappearing leads to a healing journey Brendon doesn't expect.
The shorts have always been a problem.
When you’re recovering from a below the knee amputation, they’re a staple. They grant easy access to the wound site and are more comfortable when it comes to swelling management because they aren’t as confining as regular pants.
For Brendon they are absolute torture.
It doesn’t matter if it’s the cycling shorts, cute pjs, or those ones you wear to physio they unlock something in Brendon that makes him fucking feral. They have done ever since that first night at Jesse’s.
Although his libido has taken a hit over the past three weeks. It’s back with a vengeance now as he watches you do a quad set on the bed in preparation for your official sign off later this afternoon.
Up and down.
Up and down.
Each motion of your leg gives him a flash of those panties underneath, the rainbow ones he’s tugged off with his teeth many a time. His cock swells underneath his scrubs, throbbing as he tries to count your reps and focus on anything other than what’s going on underneath those shorts.
“What’s getting you all hot and bothered over there?” You tease as you ease your bandaged limb back down onto the mattress before letting out a long exhale. He thought he was doing a good job of hiding his arousal but it appears he can’t escape your eagle eye.
“It’s the shorts.” He admits, gesturing towards the forest green gym shorts you’re wearing. “They’ve always done a little something for me.”
“Oh.” You say, propping yourself up on your elbows, your gaze lowering to the defined shape of his dick amongst the navy-blue fabric of his scrubs. “Are you…”
“Dripping.” He finishes, clearing his throat as he tries to disguise his treacherous cock within the clever folds of the fabric. “I have blue balls constantly.”
You huff out a laugh, and he pouts at your revelry at his misfortune. “The fact you’re so mean to me only makes it worse.” He tells you, his cock pulsing as that sound sends electricity crackling through his body. “It’s a glutton for punishment.”
“No, it’s not that… although that is a little funny.” You say hauling yourself up into a sitting position. You hand runs through your hair, pushing it back away from your features. “I’m just relieved that little Brendon’s taking an interest.”
He understands that you’re building a new relationship with your body, that you might not feel as attractive as you once did. Reclaiming that sense of self, it’s one of the hardest parts of being an amputee.
“Well he’s currently trying to battle his way out of my scrubs right now.” Brendon points at the tent he’s pitching. “And I thought we agreed it was above average.”
“I think we need to check again like that time we were roleplaying slutty professor.” You drawl out the words as you shift onto the edge of the bed, your good knee hooked over the edge. “Remember how much you liked the sting of the riding crop when you were being a naughty boy.”
His teeth sinking into his lower lip to stifle the groan that tears from his chest. He vividly recalls that night, the sight of you in a leather pencil skirt and glasses, the bite of the crop on his thighs because he couldn’t keep his hands to himself.
“Christ, you’re going to make me come in my pants with this shit.” He mutters, raising his eyes to the water stained ceiling and trying to think of anything other than you edging the fuck out of him while wearing a pair of lace gloves.
Arthroscopies, fracture repairs. He tries to run through each of the procedures in his head to make his dick stop its rampant torment.
“Brendon.” You interrupt him his thoughts. “Come here.”
You’re using that tone again, the deviant sexy one from that night. He obeys on impulse, his feet finding their way to you, taking up residence in front of you. His dick twitches against the inside of his scrubs as you toy with the drawstrings.
“I don’t want you to feel like you have to…”
“I know.” You run your hand up the length of his cock through his scrubs and he spits out a curse, his hips arching on their own accord as you fondle him. “I actually miss this part a lot and just because I’m out of action until my doctor signs off doesn’t mean you can’t get any action.”
“Rae…” He breathes but then the cold air hits his dick as his scrubs are drawn down, your warm fingers wrapping around his cock.
“Oh baby, you really did miss me didn’t you.” You smirk as you run your palm over the tip of his dick, smearing the drops of pre-cum over it before you pump him lightly. “You’re practically leaking all over my hand.”
Fuck this feels good, your hand gliding up and down his cock, squeezing his dick the way you know he likes it.
“When you’re ready…” His words come between ragged pants, his chest heaving as a lightning storm starts to crackle under his skin, his lower back starting to tingle. “I’m going to bury my face between your thighs and tongue fuck you the life out of you.”
“Brendon.” You tut, that wicked smile crossing your features as he thrusts into your grasp, chasing his release. “You think I don’t lie here thinking about that, that I don’t get wet imagining you touching me.”
“Are you wet now Rae?” His voice is a rasp, his entire body trembling with ecstasy as you hold him right there on the precipice. “Please baby, let me taste you.”
Your hand delves underneath the waistband of your shorts, your fingers coming out glistening. He moans at the sight before you press them to his lips, smearing your taste across them. He opens his mouth, your flavour bursting on his tongue as you press down it. His hips piston into your fist, his moans muffled as the rapture surges up in him like thunder, crashing through his nerve endings, stealing away his breath until he’s erupting all over that pilled Ravens t-shirt, his white-hot streaks of cum spattering across the letters on your tits.
“Fuck.” He mutters as he stares down at the mess he’s left. “That’s the best the Ravens have ever looked.”
“You’re such a fucking asshole.” You say fondly, stripping the shirt off from your body and tossing it into your dirty laundry bag. His gaze strays down to your sports bra, to those perfect tits pushed together.
“Next time, I’m going to come right here.” He murmurs, his fingertips trailing along your cleavage. “After I take my time giving you all the love that you deserve.”
Like My Work? - Tip your friendly fan fic writer here!
AN: I thought we'd take a break from the angst to share a little fun moment between these two. This connects to my Robby and Jesse stories, so a few of you may recognise a little mention of a certain someone.
Summary: Brandon gets curious when he learns you have other plans.
Set After:
The First Time (NSFW) - Fireworks aren't the only explosive thing happening at Jesse's Fourth of July party.
A Loaded Gun (NSFW) - Hate sex has never been so fucking hot...
The Game - Brendon finds himself breaking his own rules when it comes to you.
Pittfest -Brendon comforts you when you fall apart after the events of Pittfest.
Set Before:
The Drawer - Brendon realises your relationship may be shifting when he discovers he has a drawer at your place.
Scrunchies - Scrunchies… they’re the downfall of Brendon Park.
Love Games (NSFW) - Brendon and you love to play games, especially with each other.
An Exquisite Form of Torture (NSFW) - Brendon continues to turn up the heat as he holds you captive.
THAT Guy - Brendon is forced to face up to his feelings for you when he finds out your meeting up with an ex.
Seven Days - Seven days is far too long to go without you...
Save It - A thirty six hour shift leads to another admission about your relationship with Brendon.
Doctor Dick - Brendon's day takes a turn when Whitaker gives him some critical information.
A Manipulative Fuck - You and Brendon discuss what happened with your ex.
The Call (NSFW) - Brendon decides to put a stop to David's calls once and for all.
The One That Hates The Ravens - David's attempt at revenge backfires spectacularly.
The Lovin Spoonful - You wake up to an unexpected surprise.
Delete, Block, Rinse, Repeat - A series of cryptic messages force Brendon to confront a secret he's been keeping for almost a decade.
His Father's Son - Brendon reflects on the past as he debates taking that first sip of whiskey.
The Cost of Dignity - Brendon's greatest secret comes with a cost.
A Kiss For Luck - Brendon struggles to navigate working at the hospital after the release of THAT video.
The Craziest Fucking Thing - You take matters into your own hands after receiving bad news from Brendon.
Ride Or Die - You wake up to the sound of an angry blender after Brendon discovers what happened with Rowena.
Diamonds (NSFW) - A bet leads to naughty shenanigans in a five star restaurant.
The Call Out - Brendon's focus on wedding planning is disrupted when he's called out to the scene of a multi-car pile up.
Good Hands - Abbot reminds Brendon you're in good hands as they proceed with the amputation.
Flayed - Brendon's world crashes down as he learns the truth about the accident.
There’s a protein bar in your pocket.
You don’t know how it got there or when it got there, only that it is there at exactly the right time you need it. If you don’t get something in your stomach in the next thirty seconds, you’re going to combust. You drop onto the wheelie stool in front of the computer, one hand swiping your card across the reader unlocking it, the other grasping the protein bar as you tear off the wrapper with your teeth, tossing it onto the desk alongside the mouse.
Your gaze lingers on it as you chew, because you know that brand, it’s the one Park has stored away in his kitchen cupboards. You withdraw your phone from your pocket, tapping on the display to bring up your shared text thread.
Rae: I have questions about how you were able to sneak a protein bar into the pocket of my scrubs without me noticing.
🦈: I had a very misspend youth… Besides you’ll need your strength for later on 🍆 💦 💥
Rae: Can’t tonight I’ve got plans.
🦈: You’re fucking with me.
Rae: Got a date.
🦈: Is he prettier than me?
Rae: *sends screenshot
🦈: Ouch. Can’t compete with that.
Rae: Yeah, I’m looking after the little fella for Jesse. Robby’s away on a CPD course and he’s gonna be stuck at the hospital for a while. He didn’t want to leave Trouble alone for too long, so I volunteered to take care of him for the evening. Looks like it’ll just be you and your hand tonight.
🦈: You know I’m really great with dogs.
Rae: Uh huh…
🦈: Like the best.
Rae: And what will you say when Jesse comes to pick him up and finds you in my apartment?
🦈: Who’s to say Jesse doesn’t already know about the two of us?
Rae: Are you for real right now?
🦈: We fucked in his spare room, you think he didn’t figure that out right away?
Rae: OMFG… is that why he always has that knowing look in his eye when he asks me how my night’s been???
🦈: I’m not giving him details if that’s what you’re asking, he just picks up on stuff.
Rae: What kind of stuff?
🦈: The fact you seem less stressed these days, happier.
Rae: That’s not because of you. I got some new bathsalts, they’re helping me sleep.
🦈: Alright princess, whatever you say 😘 Did we agree that I could come over to play with the puppy?
Rae: Only because I need someone to pick up his poop when I take him for a walk. That will be your job since you’ve decided to puppysit with me.
🦈: You’re a harsh mistress but I find the terms agreeable. I’ll be round later with treats… for the dog of course.
Rae: Uh huh…
🦈: And you know if you wanna show me how those bathsalts work after he’s gone… I mean I could use a good night sleep too.
Rae: Fine… but only because I want to see you try and fit in my tub.
Love Park the Shark? Don’t miss any of their stories by joining the taglist here.
Before you join the taglist make sure to read the rules here as you otherwise you won’t be added.
AN: I thought we'd take a break from the angst to share a little fun moment between these two. This connects to my Robby and Jesse stories, so a few of you may recognise a little mention of a certain someone.
Summary: Brandon gets curious when he learns you have other plans.
Set After:
The First Time (NSFW) - Fireworks aren't the only explosive thing happening at Jesse's Fourth of July party.
A Loaded Gun (NSFW) - Hate sex has never been so fucking hot...
The Game - Brendon finds himself breaking his own rules when it comes to you.
Pittfest -Brendon comforts you when you fall apart after the events of Pittfest.
Set Before:
The Drawer - Brendon realises your relationship may be shifting when he discovers he has a drawer at your place.
Scrunchies - Scrunchies… they’re the downfall of Brendon Park.
Love Games (NSFW) - Brendon and you love to play games, especially with each other.
An Exquisite Form of Torture (NSFW) - Brendon continues to turn up the heat as he holds you captive.
THAT Guy - Brendon is forced to face up to his feelings for you when he finds out your meeting up with an ex.
Seven Days - Seven days is far too long to go without you...
Save It - A thirty six hour shift leads to another admission about your relationship with Brendon.
Doctor Dick - Brendon's day takes a turn when Whitaker gives him some critical information.
A Manipulative Fuck - You and Brendon discuss what happened with your ex.
The Call (NSFW) - Brendon decides to put a stop to David's calls once and for all.
The One That Hates The Ravens - David's attempt at revenge backfires spectacularly.
The Lovin Spoonful - You wake up to an unexpected surprise.
Delete, Block, Rinse, Repeat - A series of cryptic messages force Brendon to confront a secret he's been keeping for almost a decade.
His Father's Son - Brendon reflects on the past as he debates taking that first sip of whiskey.
The Cost of Dignity - Brendon's greatest secret comes with a cost.
A Kiss For Luck - Brendon struggles to navigate working at the hospital after the release of THAT video.
The Craziest Fucking Thing - You take matters into your own hands after receiving bad news from Brendon.
Ride Or Die - You wake up to the sound of an angry blender after Brendon discovers what happened with Rowena.
Diamonds (NSFW) - A bet leads to naughty shenanigans in a five star restaurant.
The Call Out - Brendon's focus on wedding planning is disrupted when he's called out to the scene of a multi-car pile up.
Good Hands - Abbot reminds Brendon you're in good hands as they proceed with the amputation.
Flayed - Brendon's world crashes down as he learns the truth about the accident.
There’s a protein bar in your pocket.
You don’t know how it got there or when it got there, only that it is there at exactly the right time you need it. If you don’t get something in your stomach in the next thirty seconds, you’re going to combust. You drop onto the wheelie stool in front of the computer, one hand swiping your card across the reader unlocking it, the other grasping the protein bar as you tear off the wrapper with your teeth, tossing it onto the desk alongside the mouse.
Your gaze lingers on it as you chew, because you know that brand, it’s the one Park has stored away in his kitchen cupboards. You withdraw your phone from your pocket, tapping on the display to bring up your shared text thread.
Rae: I have questions about how you were able to sneak a protein bar into the pocket of my scrubs without me noticing.
🦈: I had a very misspend youth… Besides you’ll need your strength for later on 🍆 💦 💥
Rae: Can’t tonight I’ve got plans.
🦈: You’re fucking with me.
Rae: Got a date.
🦈: Is he prettier than me?
Rae: *sends screenshot
🦈: Ouch. Can’t compete with that.
Rae: Yeah, I’m looking after the little fella for Jesse. Robby’s away on a CPD course and he’s gonna be stuck at the hospital for a while. He didn’t want to leave Trouble alone for too long, so I volunteered to take care of him for the evening. Looks like it’ll just be you and your hand tonight.
🦈: You know I’m really great with dogs.
Rae: Uh huh…
🦈: Like the best.
Rae: And what will you say when Jesse comes to pick him up and finds you in my apartment?
🦈: Who’s to say Jesse doesn’t already know about the two of us?
Rae: Are you for real right now?
🦈: We fucked in his spare room, you think he didn’t figure that out right away?
Rae: OMFG… is that why he always has that knowing look in his eye when he asks me how my night’s been???
🦈: I’m not giving him details if that’s what you’re asking, he just picks up on stuff.
Rae: What kind of stuff?
🦈: The fact you seem less stressed these days, happier.
Rae: That’s not because of you. I got some new bathsalts, they’re helping me sleep.
🦈: Alright princess, whatever you say 😘 Did we agree that I could come over to play with the puppy?
Rae: Only because I need someone to pick up his poop when I take him for a walk. That will be your job since you’ve decided to puppysit with me.
🦈: You’re a harsh mistress but I find the terms agreeable. I’ll be round later with treats… for the dog of course.
Rae: Uh huh…
🦈: And you know if you wanna show me how those bathsalts work after he’s gone… I mean I could use a good night sleep too.
Rae: Fine… but only because I want to see you try and fit in my tub.
Love Park the Shark? Don’t miss any of their stories by joining the taglist here.
Before you join the taglist make sure to read the rules here as you otherwise you won’t be added.
AN: I thought we'd take a break from the angst to share a little fun moment between these two. This connects to my Robby and Jesse stories, so a few of you may recognise a little mention of a certain someone.
Summary: Brandon gets curious when he learns you have other plans.
Set After:
The First Time (NSFW) - Fireworks aren't the only explosive thing happening at Jesse's Fourth of July party.
A Loaded Gun (NSFW) - Hate sex has never been so fucking hot...
The Game - Brendon finds himself breaking his own rules when it comes to you.
Pittfest -Brendon comforts you when you fall apart after the events of Pittfest.
Set Before:
The Drawer - Brendon realises your relationship may be shifting when he discovers he has a drawer at your place.
Scrunchies - Scrunchies… they’re the downfall of Brendon Park.
Love Games (NSFW) - Brendon and you love to play games, especially with each other.
An Exquisite Form of Torture (NSFW) - Brendon continues to turn up the heat as he holds you captive.
THAT Guy - Brendon is forced to face up to his feelings for you when he finds out your meeting up with an ex.
Seven Days - Seven days is far too long to go without you...
Save It - A thirty six hour shift leads to another admission about your relationship with Brendon.
Doctor Dick - Brendon's day takes a turn when Whitaker gives him some critical information.
A Manipulative Fuck - You and Brendon discuss what happened with your ex.
The Call (NSFW) - Brendon decides to put a stop to David's calls once and for all.
The One That Hates The Ravens - David's attempt at revenge backfires spectacularly.
The Lovin Spoonful - You wake up to an unexpected surprise.
Delete, Block, Rinse, Repeat - A series of cryptic messages force Brendon to confront a secret he's been keeping for almost a decade.
His Father's Son - Brendon reflects on the past as he debates taking that first sip of whiskey.
The Cost of Dignity - Brendon's greatest secret comes with a cost.
A Kiss For Luck - Brendon struggles to navigate working at the hospital after the release of THAT video.
The Craziest Fucking Thing - You take matters into your own hands after receiving bad news from Brendon.
Ride Or Die - You wake up to the sound of an angry blender after Brendon discovers what happened with Rowena.
Diamonds (NSFW) - A bet leads to naughty shenanigans in a five star restaurant.
The Call Out - Brendon's focus on wedding planning is disrupted when he's called out to the scene of a multi-car pile up.
Good Hands - Abbot reminds Brendon you're in good hands as they proceed with the amputation.
Flayed - Brendon's world crashes down as he learns the truth about the accident.
There’s a protein bar in your pocket.
You don’t know how it got there or when it got there, only that it is there at exactly the right time you need it. If you don’t get something in your stomach in the next thirty seconds, you’re going to combust. You drop onto the wheelie stool in front of the computer, one hand swiping your card across the reader unlocking it, the other grasping the protein bar as you tear off the wrapper with your teeth, tossing it onto the desk alongside the mouse.
Your gaze lingers on it as you chew, because you know that brand, it’s the one Park has stored away in his kitchen cupboards. You withdraw your phone from your pocket, tapping on the display to bring up your shared text thread.
Rae: I have questions about how you were able to sneak a protein bar into the pocket of my scrubs without me noticing.
🦈: I had a very misspend youth… Besides you’ll need your strength for later on 🍆 💦 💥
Rae: Can’t tonight I’ve got plans.
🦈: You’re fucking with me.
Rae: Got a date.
🦈: Is he prettier than me?
Rae: *sends screenshot
🦈: Ouch. Can’t compete with that.
Rae: Yeah, I’m looking after the little fella for Jesse. Robby’s away on a CPD course and he’s gonna be stuck at the hospital for a while. He didn’t want to leave Trouble alone for too long, so I volunteered to take care of him for the evening. Looks like it’ll just be you and your hand tonight.
🦈: You know I’m really great with dogs.
Rae: Uh huh…
🦈: Like the best.
Rae: And what will you say when Jesse comes to pick him up and finds you in my apartment?
🦈: Who’s to say Jesse doesn’t already know about the two of us?
Rae: Are you for real right now?
🦈: We fucked in his spare room, you think he didn’t figure that out right away?
Rae: OMFG… is that why he always has that knowing look in his eye when he asks me how my night’s been???
🦈: I’m not giving him details if that’s what you’re asking, he just picks up on stuff.
Rae: What kind of stuff?
🦈: The fact you seem less stressed these days, happier.
Rae: That’s not because of you. I got some new bathsalts, they’re helping me sleep.
🦈: Alright princess, whatever you say 😘 Did we agree that I could come over to play with the puppy?
Rae: Only because I need someone to pick up his poop when I take him for a walk. That will be your job since you’ve decided to puppysit with me.
🦈: You’re a harsh mistress but I find the terms agreeable. I’ll be round later with treats… for the dog of course.
Rae: Uh huh…
🦈: And you know if you wanna show me how those bathsalts work after he’s gone… I mean I could use a good night sleep too.
Rae: Fine… but only because I want to see you try and fit in my tub.
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AN: So confession time... this was always the end game. It just took me a while to work my way there.
Summary: Brendon's focus on wedding planning is disrupted when he's called out to the scene of a multi-car pile up.
Set After:
The First Time (NSFW) - Fireworks aren't the only explosive thing happening at Jesse's Fourth of July party.
A Loaded Gun (NSFW) - Hate sex has never been so fucking hot...
The Game - Brendon finds himself breaking his own rules when it comes to you.
Pittfest -Brendon comforts you when you fall apart after the events of Pittfest.
The Drawer - Brendon realises your relationship may be shifting when he discovers he has a drawer at your place.
Scrunchies - Scrunchies… they’re the downfall of Brendon Park.
Love Games (NSFW) - Brendon and you love to play games, especially with each other.
An Exquisite Form of Torture (NSFW) - Brendon continues to turn up the heat as he holds you captive.
THAT Guy - Brendon is forced to face up to his feelings for you when he finds out your meeting up with an ex.
Seven Days - Seven days is far too long to go without you...
Save It - A thirty six hour shift leads to another admission about your relationship with Brendon.
Doctor Dick - Brendon's day takes a turn when Whitaker gives him some critical information.
A Manipulative Fuck - You and Brendon discuss what happened with your ex.
The Call (NSFW) - Brendon decides to put a stop to David's calls once and for all.
The One That Hates The Ravens - David's attempt at revenge backfires spectacularly.
The Lovin Spoonful - You wake up to an unexpected surprise.
Delete, Block, Rinse, Repeat - A series of cryptic messages force Brendon to confront a secret he's been keeping for almost a decade.
His Father's Son - Brendon reflects on the past as he debates taking that first sip of whiskey.
The Cost of Dignity - Brendon's greatest secret comes with a cost.
A Kiss For Luck - Brendon struggles to navigate working at the hospital after the release of THAT video.
The Craziest Fucking Thing - You take matters into your own hands after receiving bad news from Brendon.
Ride Or Die - You wake up to the sound of an angry blender after Brendon discovers what happened with Rowena.
Diamonds (NSFW) - A bet leads to naughty shenanigans in a five star restaurant.
Brendon’s thinking about the wedding venue when he gets the call out.
You’d spent the weekend touring intimate locations around the city, looking for somewhere that felt like just the right place. The old Brendon, the one he was before meeting you, would have been climbing the walls trying to escape this fate, but the man he is now had loved every damn second of it because it represents a future, one that he almost never allowed himself to have.
The two of you had settled on The Art Room, a venue in the Strip District that combines industrial charm with fine arts sophistication. It’s run by the PA Market, a restaurant a few blocks over that offers world class cuisine.
All I want is good food, a little music and you, you’d told him when he was pulling together the list of places to view.
Brendon, he just wants to make your dreams come true, so he plays to his strengths, utilising the details he’s picked up over the course of the relationship. How much you love the fall, your preference for warm low lighting in the evenings, the fact you’re drawn to bold, interesting art.
“Whitaker wants to do the buttonholes and my bouquet as a wedding gift.” You’d told him last night when you were leaning over the dining table in his condo wearing nothing but his Steelers t-shirt. He’s barely used it during his entire residence at the condo but now it’s become wedding planning HQ with seating plans, a timeline of deposits and a provisional running order for the big day in a couple of months’ time. “Apparently he used to do stuff like this when he was living in Broken Bow for all their country weddings.”
“I need to see proof of his work.” Brendon informs you as you pick up your phone bringing up the chat thread between you and Whitaker. You hand it to him, and he is very surprised by the level of intricacy that farmboi doctor has put into the floral arrangements on screen. “If he wants to do them and you’re happy with it, then I agree. But he’s not paying for it. His wife is about to give birth and he’s gonna need that residency salary for diapers.”
“Don’t worry your pretty little head about it.” You tell him, your arms wrapping around his shoulders from behind, your cheek pressing against his as you survey his hard work. “We’re going to the flower market tomorrow because he wants to ‘find my vibe’ and mock up something to show you. I have your black Amex already tucked away in my purse, so I’ll make sure I pay for it before he has a chance.”
That’s where you are right now. You’d begrudgingly dragged yourself out of bed before five this morning because Whitaker runs on Nebraska farm time and wants to get there as soon as it opens. You’d sent a picture of the two of you in the greenhouse surrounded by acres of flowers, you with sunglasses and a vat of coffee in your hand and Whitaker giving a thumbs up with the biggest smile.
“It’s disgusting how cheerful he is for this ungodly hour.” You’ve written underneath. He’d smiled before placing the phone in the top shelf of his locker and changing into his scrubs so he could check out today’s surgery board.
An hour later he’s hitching a ride in an ambulance with Jack Abbot, who by the grace of God was still on shift when dispatch called through about the multi-car pile-up.
“You ever done one of these before? An onsite amputation?” The army vet asks him as they sit alongside each other across from the gurney. They’re wearing matching insulated PTMC jackets heralding them as part of the medical team.
“Yeah.” Brendon pats the bag alongside him containing the specialised saw and the rest of his medical kit. “This will by my fourth. Two were a building collapse and my third another RTA.”
“Hm.” Abbot responds, rechecking the camo rucksack that’s nestled between this thighs as the ambulance starts to slow. “They survive?”
“Three out of three so far.” Brendon states, holding up his fingers as Abbot hauls himself to his feet. The ambulance stops, and already Brendon can hear the noise that comes with being in the midst of an active accident scene. Apprehension settles in his chest, the same way it always does. There’s a reason he prefers the surgical floor, the ordered structure of the operating room, the quiet that comes with it.
“Let’s make it four.” Abbot says as the ambulance door is torn open and the full impact of the scene hits him. “I’ll give you an assist and then we’ll figure out what’s what at the triage area. Sound good to you?”
Brendon nods his head before following Abbot out into the fray, his boots hitting the ground as he’s thrust into the madness. The whole thing looks like something out of a nightmare. Chaos reigns, with twisted metal, burned rubber and shattered glass jetsoned along the concrete. The stench of petrol fills the air, acrid on his tongue as firefighters struggle to put out a blaze from one of the cars. Through the window, he can make out the shape of a person, unmoving, burning.
This shit… it’s the kind of thing you see all of the time, and honestly, he doesn’t understand how the hell you do it.
“Your patient is in the first car.” A lieutenant with the PBF by the name of Casey tells them as he leads them through the insanity. “Witnesses say it lost control, started weaving across the road. It ended up ploughing into a construction truck carrying concrete cylinders for a draining ditch. One went through the hood, driving the steering column into the front seat, pinning the driver. They have internal bleeding that’s being soaked up by the lungs. Our paramedics are fighting to keep them stable but we’ve been advised that the right leg is a crush injury, that if we remove the steering column it’ll send a shot of potassium straight into their heart killing them.”
“Advised by who?” Brendon asks taking a set of nitropyrene gloves out of his medical kit and pulling them on. Beside him Abbot is doing the same, his dark eyebrows furrowed as he takes in this new information.
“The passenger.” Casey informs him as he guides them around the worst of the wreckage. “He’s one of you, an emergency room doctor from PTMC. We managed to cut him out, but he won’t leave the driver.
And that’s when he sees the car, the ruby red petals strewn across concrete from the exposed trunk of the hatchback, one that he is intimately familiar with. His footsteps quicken, his heart pounding in his chest as he breaks into a run, the bone saw banging against his hip. He ignores Jack’s shout as he bolts towards the driver’s side. The door has been ripped off and there’s paramedic monitoring vitals while another holds up an I.V drip, squeezing the plastic bag.
Everything starts to slow, there’s just this violent rush of blood in his ears as the paramedics shift and he sees you sitting there, the steering column jutting into your lower body as you take short, shaky breathes in your seat. Your hand is wrapped around Whitaker’s, gripping it so hard, your knuckles are white. The resident’s eyes are glossy, red rimmed as his gaze meets Brendon’s from the passenger side.
“Rae…” Brendon whispers, his voice ragged as he crouches down alongside the car, taking in the magnitude of what he’s about to do.
“You have to.” There’s a wet rasp to your words, your chest heaving as if it’s being constricted from the inside. “It’s the only way I’ll live.”
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Summary: Brendon reflects on the past as he debates taking that first sip of whiskey.
Companion piece to:
Scrunchies - Scrunchies… they’re the downfall of Brendon Park.
Love Games (NSFW) - Brendon and you love to play games, especially with each other.
THAT Guy - Brendon is forced to face up to his feelings for you when he finds out your meeting up with an ex.
Seven Days - Seven days is far too long to go without you...
Delete, Block, Rinse, Repeat - A series of cryptic messages force Brendon to confront a secret he's been keeping for almost a decade.
Whiskey, it’s always been Brendon’s drug of choice.
Some people after they lose a child lose the will to live. They throw themselves off bridges, step under trains but not Brendon. He had fallen back into old habits, numbing the pain instead with his old friend Johnnie Walker.
In the years before his son’s arrival, he’d been a functional alcoholic.
At the time he would have said the life and soul of the party.
A fuckboi, you would have called him.
If he’s honest with himself, he was a drunk outside of his work hours, scheduling his surgeries for late afternoons so he didn’t have to operate with a hangover.
He worked hard, played hard, fixing up professional athletes at a high-end sports clinic for astronomical fees. He was the best at what he did, focusing on minimally invasive techniques and fast rehabilitations. His spent his evenings in the club, his weekends at the types of parties only celebrities hear a whisper of, and his roster was filled with one-night stands he barely remembers, which incidentally was how his son Tobias was conceived.
He has absolutely no recollection of the puck bunny when she turns up at the clinic five months pregnant with his child, not until she shows him the pictures. Park the Shark, a nickname given to him by an NBA player whose fucked up ankle he fixed, was a messy son of a bitch, leaving a trail of shit that he’s spent years and thousands of dollars trying to eradicate from the internet. He demands a paternity test almost immediately and that kid… it turned out to be 100% his.
The moment he realised he was going to be someone’s father… his entire universe had been flipped upside down.
His own parents were a haphazard, shitty pair, both with addiction issues. It didn’t take a genius to see where his own had come from.
I’ll do better, he’d promised the sonagram on the fridge as his fingertips traced over the shape of his son. I’ll love you the way that I should have been loved.
He stops going to the parties, pours his booze down the sink, replaces his cravings with the gym. By the time his son is born, he’s four months sober, and rocking it.
The moment that little boy was placed in his arms, his entire life had changed. His world before Toby was closed off, dull and muted. Now it was cracking open, bursting with colour and vibrance as he stared down at the baby with his eyes and a pert, heart shaped mouth.
He ends up becoming the primary caregiver almost immediately. He half expected it when he had his lawyer draft up the custody agreement because Rowena’s interest wasn’t in how often he got to see his son, it was solely on the amount of child support she’d receive.
That was fine with Brendon. He taken the full paternity leave, doing night feeds with formula because Rowena wanted to get back on the bunny circuit. She was itching for a husband this time, and there were a couple of new rookies on the Penguins who were young, dumb and didn’t know any better.
By the time Toby is four, his mother has only seen him six times in his entire life. She vanishes the moment the kid starts to get upset at the fact a virtual stranger is trying to wrestle him into Gucci dungarees. Brendon tries to partition for full custody, but Rowena fights him on it because she wants to keep that child support money rolling in.
He manages to balance out his work schedule with an elite daycare centre near the clinic, one that focuses on interactive and immersive learning. He picks his son up on the way home, making them both dinner before a bath, story time and bed. He adores the little life they have. The nights snuggled up on the couch watching Pixar movies, the days at the park playing on the swings, the nightlight he has in his own room because Toby likes to sneak into his bed since they’ve switched from a crib to a big boy mattress.
For the first time Brendon’s heart is full…
And then he gets that phone call, the one that feels like someone has reached inside his chest and torn his god damn heart out.
There was an accident at daycare, a shoving match between two kids over a stuffed giraffe. Toby wasn’t even been involved, he’d been a bystander who’d caught an elbow, fallen back, hit his head on the corner of the table.
By the time Brendon gets to the hospital, his son is brain dead.
The only thing keeping him alive is the ventilator breathing for him.
He can’t explain the way he fractured in that moment, how the pieces of him shattered, crunching underfoot as he was faced with an impossible decision.
Turn off the ventilator and allow Toby to pass peacefully or keep him alive and watch his body start to deteriorate.
He spends two days trying to contact Rowena. The number he has for her isn’t in service, his Instagram messages go unread. There’s nothing he can do but sit in a hospital chair and watch his son wither away with every hour that goes by.
By day three he can’t take it anymore. He can’t be this cruel to the person he loves the most in this world
He signs the paperwork and holds his son’s tiny hand as he passes away in the early hours of the morning. In the aftermath he sits there, staring at an empty bed as the steely haired nurse with the gold J in his ear arranges for his son’s body to be taken to the funeral home he’d recommended.
“They’ll take very good care of him.” He promises as he talks Brendon through the process of what happens next. He’s clutching SmuSmu in his hands, a stuffed shark they’d gotten at the aquarium because Toby had heard someone call him by his nickname and thought it was hilarious. “He’s in the best possible hands.”
The earnestness in that man’s voice…
Brendon truly believes him.
It’s two days before the funeral that Rowena finally gets in touch. The things she says, they’re vicious. He takes them on the chin like the man he is until she accuses him of ending Toby’s life intentionally to hurt her, to stop those child support payments that she needs to fund her lifestyle.
He hangs up on her then, texting her the funeral updates before he delves into the bottom of a bottle. She doesn’t attend and he doesn’t expect her to.
He’s loosening the tie around his throat when he steps off the elevator after the service, and finds two cops at his door. He’s forced to explain the circumstances of his sons’ death, that his mother, who has been absent his entire life is lashing out in her grief.
It gets worse after that, phone calls, texts, social media posts. All blaming him for Toby’s passing. He blocks her on everything, spends days locked in the home he built with his son, drinking, crying, punching walls until he breaks his hand.
“I don’t know what I’m supposed to do.” His voice cracks as he tells this to Jesse, the same nurse that took care of his son. The other man is checking the IV in his arm, making sure it’s secure so that they can flush his system. He needs surgery on his hand, but his blood alcohol level is far too high to be considered anywhere near safe to go under the scalpel. “I don’t know how to live without him.”
“I’ve never lost a child, but from what I have learned from people who have… There’s no quick or easy way through it.” There’s a sadness in Jesse’s voice, one that comes with seeing far too much tragedy. Brendon gets it, the E.R, it’s not for the faint of heart. “Having support helps, we have a list of groups, I could get some of them for you?”
Brendon doesn’t speak, that emotion is welling up in his chest, his eyes stinging as he catches a glimpse of the family room across from the nurse’s station, the place where he’d been told his son was brain dead. Jesse pulls the curtain across when he catches his stare, severing the connection between the two spaces.
“Why don’t you tell me what he was like?” He offers, pulling up a chair and Brendon, he does, he tells him everything. From his son’s tinkling laugh, to the way he would shake his tiny butt to Shakira.
Jesse laughs and Brendon finds himself laughing too, then he’s crying again, apologising and that nurse… he’s the kindest man on this earth. He simply reaches over, squeezing his arm as he looks him right in the eye and says. “This is how you keep going. You remember the wonderful bright little boy he was. You keep that memory in your heart, think of it when you feel like you’re crashing out.”
And he does.
Everytime he considers picking up the bottle, he remembers Toby’s little hands leaving paint marks all over the coffee table, his voice singing Baby Shark as he pointed himself and then Brendon.
He stops drinking, hits a weekly grief meeting, quits the clinic.
He takes a job at PTMC instead, using his expertise to reattach limbs and restore mobility to folks who wouldn’t get that kind of treatment otherwise. That work… it fills his soul just a little, enough to make him feel like he’s making a difference.
After a year he moves into a new condo, one with better security because Rowena’s started up again, only this time she’s sending letters and making in person visits, screaming about what she’s owed.
“You’re looking good, better in yourself.” Jesse tells him when they run into each other in the E.R. He’s recently made the switch to PTMC after a bad break up, he also needs a change from Emergency Pediatrics,
“Yeah I am.” Brendon admits as they share a smoke together in the ambulance bay. “No one here knows…”
He doesn’t have to say anymore than that, he can see that Jesse gets it. He’s done everything he can to cultivate his reputation as a no-nonsense professional, despite the fact NBA player Marcus Brawn had swept in during a charity visit to the cancer ward and almost fucked the whole thing up for him by yelling ‘Park the Shark’ across the nurse’s station.
Unfortunately… the nickname had stuck.
It’s Jesse that he calls tonight as he’s sitting in front of that whiskey glass, itching to take that first sip. It’s him that physically pulls Brendon from the stool, who escorts him to a meeting, who calls Rowena and threatens legal action if she dares contact Brendon again.
It’s him that drops Brendon off at your apartment building, who reminds him if he’s serious about you, really fucking serious then you need to hear the truth from him before Rowena decides to blow up his life, because that woman, she’s seven shades of hateful and he does not believe for a single second that this is the end of it.
“Hi.” You say when you open the door, wearing a black t-shirt and pink pyjama shorts with ghosts on. Your hair is piled up on top of your head in a messy bun, held in place with a matching scrunchie. “I wasn’t expecting you tonight.”
“I know I…” He swallows hard against the lump in his throat, the one that feels like it’s about to damn near suffocate him. “I need to tell you something… it’s about me… I…”
His eyes start to burn, his heart palpitating his chest, his hands curl into trembling fists. You’re going to run he knows it, you’re going to say it’s too much, slam the door in his face and…
Your arms wrap around him instead, drawing his rigid form into the shelter of your body. He melts against you, burying his face into your hair, breathing you in. Your palms smooth over the contours of his back, rubbing light, soothing circles as he clutches you to him like a lifeline, like you’re the only thing keeping him tethered on this fucked up little planet.
“It’s ok.” You say softly, your lips brushing over his cheek in a featherlight kiss. “Whatever it is you have to tell me, it’s going to be ok.”
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Okay, Rowena's a spiteful bitch, but with the way this was going I was honestly convinced that it was going to turn out he had driven drunk with his kid and got in an accident which was the COD for Toby and that's why he blamed himself for Toby's death. As much as I'm grateful this wasn't the case, I'm also still devastated for him ;-; I couldn't imagine that guilt and grief....
(I still get how can blame himself with this scenario)
I think everyone thought that but I wanted it to be different, I wanted to show how his son was the making of him and he managed to turn his life around because of how much he loved that child.
@bullet-prooflove I'm so grateful you did it that way, because I don't know if I could have continued to enjoy their story the same way if it was physically his doing as opposed to him preventing his sons suffering.
