gay shit

Hello? Female, 24 years old

[toss-a-coin-to-your-stan-account]

fucking love when I'm on a call with someone and they start to do a little errand or go somewhere else and they say "and you're coming with me" like. absolutely I am let's go on an adventure I've been spirited away

[googiekitsch-deactivated2024071]

this text i got from my mom a few hours ago is so hysterical she doesnt even use peacock she literally went on it for the first time and Dickbreath the Mysterious awaited her with an outstretched finger

[splatterpunkrock]

oh fuck this is a really good hill i gotta die on this

[heavy-metal-mad-scientist]

rich people seeing mount everest

[kleefkruid]

cats would be so fucking upset if they understood they were missing out on the ability to lie verbally

[verdantry]

[eden-has-rotted]

me: chat what do we think

the angel and devil on my shoulders: can you not call us that please

[mariaalenkoshepard]

I had a dream last night that I was at a coffee shop and there was a drink called ‘fistbumping lesbians’ and it was a seven shot caramel latte

[mariaalenkoshepard]

I start work super early tomorrow so guess who’s gonna make herself a fistbumping lesbians at the start of her shift

[mariaalenkoshepard]

Behold the fistbumping lesbians

Jsyk this thing could wake the dead

[mariaalenkoshepard]

4 hours later: I’m fricken ZAZZED you guys

[mariaalenkoshepard]

Me rn

[bramblepatch]

This is… not usually what is meant by “follow your dreams”…

[betweenthefairiesandme]

Do you guys wanna see the smallest dog ever

[betweenthefairiesandme]

FINE since no one responded I’ll show you anyway 🙄🙄🙄

Meet miss Libby, she’s a chihuahua runt puppy who belongs to my boyfriends sister

[45percenterthen]

there are too many acronyms now everyone needs to shut up. mcyt. my chemical youtube romance. what are you saying

[canon-but-like-gayer]

Emily: “I hate the government.”

Spencer: “Emily we are the government.”

[sydlorr]

Made a meme to celebrate

[dankmemeuniversity]

[enoughtohold]

thanks duolingo but i know that one

[iapislazuli]

anyone else remember being 13 on tumblr and every morning youd scroll down until you got to posts from the night before like it was the morning paper 

[farfromhomekid-deactivated20200]

I've been waiting MONTHS to share this

[hollowboobtheory]

it's all fun and games until you take a little too long to swallow your medication and you start tasting it

[debelice]

Massive retractable windows on this train in Switzerland

[scarabesque]

Me just trying to read a book in the next aisle over

[friendly-neighborhood-patriarch]

it fuckn WIMDY