a little glance into my mind

hi, I'm gemma and I like to write a lot

[gemmarambles]

I hate the cold and you make winter feel warm

from me to you

[gemmarambles]

There’s a something about a storm as a month comes to an end, the way the rain washes away everything and creates a clean slate for the next four weeks to come. The tears, heartbreak, anxiety, every bad situation you were thrown into these last 30 days no longer matter. The only thing that matters is the next 30 days, and how you’re going to make those better than the last.

[gemmarambles]

I wish you had met me when I still had that light in my eyes, that love was something I desired and didn’t hide from, that I didn’t always question your motives with everything you say. I wish you were my first so you could experience a completely different me, but that’s not going to happen.

my wish to you 

[gemmarambles]

you had me wrapped around your finger for months, all I ever wanted to do was make you happy. Everything I did was to make you happy, and while I was making you happy, my happiness suffered. It suffered so much that now that you’re gone there is nothing left for me, the day you walked out, you took all my happiness with you. Why? Because that made you happy.

from me to you, as always 

[gemmarambles]

there’s a piece of my heart that still belongs to you, and I think it will always belong to you. as the days, weeks and months go by that piece of my heart only beats when I think about you, all the memories we have together, all the days we spent tangled in each others arms, the times we laughed so hard neither one of us could breathe. one day someone else might take over that piece of my heart, but for now it beats for you, and only for you.

12am thoughts (via gemmarambles)

[gemmarambles]

there’s a piece of my heart that still belongs to you, and I think it will always belong to you. as the days, weeks and months go by that piece of my heart only beats when I think about you, all the memories we have together, all the days we spent tangled in each others arms, the times we laughed so hard neither one of us could breathe. one day someone else might take over that piece of my heart, but for now it beats for you, and only for you.

12am thoughts

[gemmarambles]

Well, you’ll break his heart and he’ll break yours. But you won’t forget each other, even if one day you walk past him and neither of you acknowledges it. That’s the thing about first loves, you never forget them, they are the only person who gets your whole untouched heart. They get all the love you’ve saved up for this moment and they get to keep it forever. You may never speak again but you can guarantee that you can still picture his eyes looking into yours as he said those three words, the way he kissed you afterwards and couldn’t stop repeating those words over and over until you were both too tired to speak. However you’ll also always remember the last time he said those three words, and told you that he was going to come back for you, the way he made you believe that a happy ending did exist for both of you. Those memories will come back to you in waves, all the firsts and all the lasts, the good and the bad, but what's important is the fact that your first love is just that, the first but not the last.

from me to you

[gemmarambles]

“I always imagine that if we’d loved each other more gently it would have worked,“ she said. "We wouldn’t have hurt each other so much that it became impossible to come back. Our love was rushed, we knew there was an expiration date to “us”. As that date got closer and closer we took all the love we had for each other and used it as a defense mechanism and it turned into hate. The damage had been done and now matter how much I miss you now, I know there is no way to go back to how things were back then, no matter how much I wish we could.

from me to you

[gemmarambles]

some people don’t have to go through much loss in their lives, the loss of a loved one, the loss of a relationship, the loss of what could’ve been. those people are the lucky ones, those are the people who still love innocently because they don’t think anyone will leave them in the blink of an eye. those are the people who still think true love exists, those people who don’t have to learn to live without someone they thought would be there forever. those people love so freely and without any hesitation. I wish I could be one of those people again, I really wish I could.

things no one will ever read 5/??

[gemmarambles]

I don't hate you, but I should. I don't regret trusting you, but I should. I don't regret a single moment we spent together, but I should.

I don’t think I ever could regret you

[gemmarambles]

you can't find happiness in the same place you lost it, just as you can't go back to the person who took it from you in the first place.

things to remember

[gemmarambles]

I tried to write about you, a name that hasn’t been written down in months, but I couldn’t even write about you. There is nothing else I can say about you, nothing else worth my tears. A year ago I confessed how I felt about you, a year ago I would've done anything for a minute of your time. A year has passed and we’re complete strangers again. I guess that’s how it was meant to be,  some people are meant to be temporary, and no matter how hard I tried to avoid it, you were one of them.

from me to you, not that you even care anymore. 

[gemmarambles]

you cross my mind at least once a day, at times where I didn’t think something would remind me of you. I wonder if I cross your mind like that too, I wonder if I’m the only one who misses you this way.

from me to you (via gemmarambles)

[gemmarambles]

do you ever think of me? or am I just a distant memory of a mistake you made? I sure as hell think of you, probably too much. I just wish you maybe thought about me too.

from me to you (via gemmarambles)

[gemmarambles]

do you ever think of me? or am I just a distant memory of a mistake you made? I sure as hell think of you, probably too much. I just wish you maybe thought about me too.

from me to you

[gemmarambles]

you cross my mind at least once a day, at times where I didn't think something would remind me of you. I wonder if I cross your mind like that too, I wonder if I'm the only one who misses you this way.

from me to you

[gemmarambles]

you taught me how to love and trust again, I guess that's why it hurt so much when you left. you showed me what it was like to be truly loved and cared for, you taught me what real love was and what I deserve, or rather was I thought I deserved. In the end I deserve someone who can show me all those things and still fight for me when things get hard. in the end, I guess that wasn't you.

from me to you