Generic Hipster Nonsense @generichipsternonsense - Tumblr Blog

matthewck-deactivated20130721

hecchidechu

That moment when you want to punch internet in the mouth.

venom-snake

set-siy

inthefrankensteinplace

Maryland Gothic

- You walk out of your house wearing a coat and long pants. The snow crunches. Suddenly it is 90 degrees. You take your coat and pants off to reveal shorts and a tank top. The sky growls. You have made it angry.

- You spill a glass of orange juice. Stop it, everyone cries, stop it! But it is too late. It has already begun to run into the Bay. We all run into the Bay, in the end.

- A side alley in the Inner City. A flapping of wings. A shrieking cry. You feel feathers brush your arm. Drop to your knees, hold your copy of Edgar Allen Poe’s complete works above your head. The bird screams. You are safe for now.

- The smell of mud, horses, and cooking meat. You wake, lying in the mud with a start. You’re at RenFest. How did you get here? Will you escape this time? You pray. The king is smiling. Something moves behind his teeth.

- Today will be the day you move into your new home. But you must take everything. Taking a deep breath, you reach into your spice cabinet for the last thing. You grab the Old Bay and run. You don’t quite make it outside before a new can appears. You turn back to get the new can, hoping you’ll be fast enough this time. Where do the cans keep coming from?

- A tap on the window. You blink, beginning to sit up. Another tap, the glass cracks. You dive to the floor. You have been riding this train through the mountains for years. You know what happens when the glass breaks.