Oichi… then that solved his identity. Her sights rested upon his hands, the question of just how deathly pale they had become as they wrestled with the revelation he’d witnessed crossed her mind. The decline of any confidence from the Fairy Queen’s castle needed no hypothesizing — if he’d seen himself murder the love of his life in what could be the future in his world; anyone in his position would be rattled. “Love can be complicated. There’s still a lot about it I have yet to learn, but it takes on all forms. Sometimes, it is like a wild fire that destroys everything in its path. But that wasn’t the case for you, was it?“ Judged by his words, it wasn’t a case that his vision and the history she knew aligned; there must have been a reason behind his actions. With how torn up he was in front of her at the mere prospect, it defied all reason that there was no explanation.
“Are you able to describe the circumstances. Was it a move that was made in the heat of the moment when you’d lost control of yourself? It wasn’t by her choice that you struck her?” The lump in her throat slid down, forced by conscious effort to push it back. “I’m sorry, if it’s too much, then there’s no need to push yourself to answer. This is a traumatizing sight, and you might prefer to try and bury it altogether. There’s no guarantee that’s what waits for you on the other side of your time here. In this state, it doesn’t seem feasible that you could turn your sword on her”.
When his head rose to cast his sights upon her, she avoided the eyes that snuck out from the shadows, guilt swirling in the pit of her stomach threatened to seize her heart and squeeze until it was crushed if she did. “You could say that. To be honest, it’s actually much worse. There are countless lives I’ve taken. Many were monsters that threatened peace of lands and their people. But not all of them.
There were entire worlds that disappeared because I helped fight against them. It was for the sake of preserving our own, but that’s… no comfort to the people who had just as much right to live in those dead-ends. There were young girls we befriended, whose very existences we denied in the end by wiping out their worlds”. The glint in Koyanskaya’s eyes bore through her from the past, some days or weeks. “Maybe even a serial killer would be disgusted with what we’ve done. What’s still happening. There are more lives that we’ll take, no matter how much we don’t want to. Maybe trying to justify it as something we’re hesitant to do is just a greater insult to their deaths”.
Katsuie shook his head at the young woman’s question about his love. Sure, his feelings for Lady Oichi were all-consuming, but they would never hurt her. All he wanted to do was love her and treat her like the goddess she was. To him, that meant one day marrying her —– or failing that, eloping with her. Katsuie could picture the two of them raising a family and growing old together. He only wanted the best for her, so why had he watched himself kill her ?
❛❛ Well... ❜❜ Katsuie’s voice trembled, forcing him to pause. It was painful enough to remember what he’d seen, let alone consider all the ways he could’ve hurt Lady Oichi. Even still, he found himself shaking his head at the stranger’s apology. No ——– he needed to think through why he’d seen himself murder the woman he loved. If he could figure out why he’d done it, then he could prevent it.
❛❛ The look in my eyes was so cold. I swung down my naginata, cutting into her body as I would with any other enemy. Because of that, I...think I must have planned to do it, to some extent. But that is what I fail to understand. Even at my worst, I would never raise a hand against Lady Oichi, no matter how impassioned I was. So...why ? Why would I have plotted to murder her ? Why was there nothing inside me that stopped me from carrying out such an action ? ❜❜ That was the part Katsuie couldn’t understand. What motivation would Katsuie have had within himself to kill the love of his life ? None. Could someone have forced him into it ? He doubted it. The most probable source of pressure would be Lord Nobunaga, but even he seemed unlikely. As little as he thought of Lady Oichi, she’d hadn’t committed any major mistakes. Therefore, what reason would Lord Nobunaga have to kill his own sister ? Also, as much as he feared his lord, Katsuie knew he couldn’t carry out an order from Lord Nobunaga to kill Lady Oichi. She was worth more to Katsuie than his own life.
The young woman’s confession startled Katsuie. Wiping away tears, he glanced up at her with wide eyes. Killing multiple worlds full of people...was that even possible ? Even Lord Nobunaga hadn’t been able to do such a thing, despite his lack of conscience and lust for destruction. How was Katsuie supposed to believe that this guilt-ridden stranger had done such a thing ?
❛❛ I am...not quite sure I understand the breadth or the weight of your supposed crimes. I cannot imagine fighting against a whole world or exterminating all of its people. However...your understanding of the sinfulness of your actions should mean something. There are people —– ’people’ in the loosest sense of the term —– who never feel that they have committed wrongs. Who do not care about the consequences of their actions. Who cannot be bothered to consider what others might think of them. And, at the very least...you do not strike me as such a ‘person’. ❜❜
