You Confuse Me With Her

indie freydis and katya from history's vikings- please read informational pages before interacting!

[ghxst-queen]

In your mind, you confuse me with her. But I am not her.

Now open for interactions! Indie Freydis & Katya written by Sarah, non-selective and always open for new threads :) Please DM me or send an ask/meme if you want to write something!

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[ghxst-queen]

Hi! Would you be interested in a group vikings rp on Discord?

Oh my gods I have no idea when you sent this in, but YES i would be!! If you're still around and the offer is still there please send me a DM with the link to join!!

[ghxst-queen]

What is Dead May Never Die

Freydis’s heart was pounding as she sat with that letter, reading it again and again and again, This... this confession, she’d sworn to herself never to make, and she had to make it. Ever since Ivar had left Kiev, it had been eating her up, gutting her, to have this secret still buried deep inside her chest. He had changed, there in Kiev, changed enough that as he’d been walking away, she’d suddenly felt the urge to tell him. But that quiet voice in her head had yelled Stop! Don’t you remember what he did to you in Kattegat? Don’t you remember the way you fled, thanking the gods that his attempt on your life had not been successful? You can’t tell him the truth now. He’ll do it again.

Her fear had kept her mouth shut, and in the end, she’d watched him go, knowing the truth that she hid from him, knowing that, this time, she truly carried their child, knowing that... that so much had changed from when they had last been in Kattegat. And he was going home, to their home, and she would remain in Kiev, have this child there, and watch over Igor. Someone had to, and she figured she may as well. It wasn’t public knowledge that she carried the child of Ivar the Boneless, and as she began to grow, she knew people would expect that this would be the child of Prince Oleg, who she truly despised now. He had saved her once, and then thrown her to the wolves, so far as she had been concerned, by dropping her right back in with Ivar. It made her glad to know he had died a childless man, and that it was his enemy whose child she carried. 

But ultimately, she thought it good that she had been thrown in with Ivar the way she was, both of them ultimately working with Dir to save Igor. It was said that ‘the enemy of my enemy is my friend’, and that had ended up being true. There’d been their affair, of course, which she considered to be far more than just a friendly sort of thing- and judging from his confession to her, when they successfully overthrew Oleg, he had considered the same- but she doubted it would have come about at all if they’d not both been working for Dir. Not unless Oleg had had suspicions, and sent her to him to find out. But that was all in the past now, as was Kattegat. This letter she held in her hands, however, was not. She swallowed hard as she read over it once more.

Dearest Ivar,

I sincerely hope this letter has found you safely arrived in Kattegat, and happily settled in there. Kiev has been quieter since you and Hvitserk left, and I would be remiss in not confessing that I miss the noise. Igor studies for much of the day, and Dir is busy undoing much of what Oleg had done. Overall, I find my presence here is less and less needed, except that I am still keeping a careful eye on Igor.

Your child is also doing well, I am told, and the healers here seemed very pleased the last time they checked my health. I am still thankful for your forgiveness, that you did not hold it against me I could not come with you to Kattegat, even though I carried your child. But, I am afraid that is not all I should have asked your forgiveness for.

I kept another secret from you, from the time we met in Kiev until the day you left to return to Kattegat, and even until the moment I finally decided to write this letter, and tell you the truth of it. Or, at least, all that I can without fear of what happens if this letter is intercepted before it arrives with you. Though I find it difficult to find the words to make this confession, now that I am trying to make it. Perhaps I should simply put the words on the page, and forget the presentation? I think that is what you would do, and so I think that is the easiest way to do it myself, if not the easiest way for you to receive this news.

Ivar, you were right about me from the beginning, who I was, and how we had known each other before. You claimed we had a connection, and I claimed to not understand that connection, but I did. I understood every moment how we had known each other before, what things had gone right for us, what things had gone wrong, and how things were left between us. It was that final piece of knowledge that kept me from revealing who I was to you for so long. In truth, I feared that you may wish to ‘finish it’, for lack of better words- make a second attempt, and ensure that you did not fail again. Truly, that was all which kept me from stopping you before you left Kiev, and telling you then. Perhaps I should have. Perhaps you deserved to hear the truth from my mouth, and not my hand, but what is done is done, and this will have to do.

I hope you will not hate me for this. I know, once, you told your men that hatred could never take the place of love. But we both know that is not true, don’t we? So maybe it is too much for me to ask, that you will not hate me for this. In that case, I think I would not be wrong to ask that you do not return to Kiev with the intent of ending my life now, as you could not before. I hope you recognise the trust I am placing in you to make this confession, and... if there is anything you wish to know, then I hope you will somehow allow me to explain, whether it is by returning to Kiev with that purpose in mind, allowing me to return to Kattegat in the same way, or responding to this letter with your questions. Though- I will warn my answers will have to be vague, as I do not trust this letter could not be read before it reaches you.

You were right. I am her, and I hope I have not disappointed you now that you realise it.

Yours,

Freydis

It had taken a lot for her to send that letter, and once the gates of Kiev had closed behind the messenger, she knew there was no turning back. Nor, really, was there any point to waiting. She had no confirmation that Ivar would even respond to her letter, much less do anything else. But the letter was sent, and so all she could do now was continue to prepare for the baby, and if not wait, then hope- hope and pray for the best, whatever that would be. And that would have to be enough, until something changed, if it ever did.

@justoneneck

[deans-ch-ch-cherrypie-deactivat]

I'm gonna make you suffer

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(the devil within)

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[ghxst-queen]

IMPORTANT ANNOUNCEMENT

This blog is now a sideblog to @nctaboutyou! I'm tagging my RP partners here, and so if you get the notification that you have been followed by this account, It’s just me again! I decided to move all of my active RP blogs to the same account, so same mod, same muses, just a different primary blog :) That said, I should have replies coming out sometime later today! Thank you for your patience, and I look forward to getting back to writing! Skål!

@ivar-the-boneless @fayofavalon

[ghxst-queen]

ivar-the-boneless​:

It pained Ivar to think that Freydis had never thought about the details of her wedding before. It made sense to him because she’d been a slave and a lot of slaves never married, a lot of places never allowed for slaves to marry. All of it made Ivar hate the idea of slaves even more, but he understood that it was a part of their society. Every place had them- he just started to pay attention to just how those people were treated. It seemed like people could be in the wrong place at the wrong time and become someone’s slave. 

He ran his fingers through her long hair and smiled softly just happy to be in this situation. Ivar spent a lot of his time observing how people interact with each other, for a long time he watched everyone and everything because that was how he picked up on the right social cues, his mother didn’t really parent him he realized. She just gave him whatever he wanted because she felt bad for him, she smothered him and going to Wessex with his Father had taught him a lot about himself. It was the first time that he felt like an individual instead of ‘Ragnar’s cripple.’ 

That trip also showed him that he was special. He had learned to become an individual, granted his father told him things that were long overdo- but the fact he said them at all still meant the world to Ivar. Ragnar’s speech gave him the fire to want to be something else- gave him the ruthlessness to fight for the things he needed to and it gave him the confidence that had been lacking his whole life.

He wouldn’t directly say that Ragnar was the reason he was lying here with Freydis now, but everything in his life had prepared him to be ready for his Queen. Five years ago he was a selfish person, nearly incapable of loving anyone but himself… now the selfishness was gone despite what others thought. Ivar only cared about the success and safety of Kattegat, the happiness of his soon to be wife, and the health of the hopeful child they would have. The Gods were finally rewarding them both for all their struggles in life and he was beyond grateful for it. 

“I am by far the luckiest man in Midgard.” he admitted running his hand mindlessly up and down her back finding it hard to just be still. Hearing her giggle brought a smile to his face, she was one of the most genuine people he ever met and he was practically in awe that those genuine responses were addressed towards him. He smirked slightly and shook her head “The bride is the most beautiful thing about a wedding… the setting sun reflecting off your hair, the shine of the moon and the flicker of the flams on your skin as the sun sets.” he brushed her cheek slightly “I can’t think of a more beautiful sight Freydis.” he responded truthfully. 

The more they discussed the future the more he was excited to let all of Kattegat know of his decision to marry Freydis. He was almost considering making everyone come to the hall now so he could tell them, but figured that wouldn’t make too many people happy- especially considering half of Kattegat was drunk from the celebrations. 

@ghxst-queen

It was a known fact that many slaves would never marry. If someone wanted one as a spouse, they would have to go to that slave’s master, ask for the right to marry, but even then it wasn’t a common thing. Some slaves, perhaps, would fantasise about their weddings, but Freydis never had. She didn’t see the point in exciting herself about something, only to realise again and again that she would never be able to have it. Unless she were suddenly freed, then what use would it be to taunt herself?

She’d learned many things through her time as a slave, including how to handle dealing with other people. Yes, she had had parents, but neither of them had been able to be very close to her. She’d learned how to conduct herself through pure trial and error, and ended up quite wise to the way society worked- as well as working society to her benefit. After all, Freydis hadn’t started as a slave who worked in the Great Hall. She’d figured out the right people to win over, and even as a slave, there were plenty of ranks one could move up, if they knew exactly what it was they were doing.

Freydis, through her climbing, had learned to be cunning. She’d learned to be quick in her mind, and how to work another person’s mind and heart to put her in a better position. Perhaps it was no surprise, then, that she held Loki as her patron god. He’d gotten her through a lot, she believed, and she knew he would get her through whatever. He was the god she placed her faith in, above all others, and he had led her to Ivar. How could she not?

As a young girl, she’d been fairly naïve. She had believed each man as she got older that he would free her if she would be theirs, but they always left her behind. In the end, she’d become wise to this, learned to expect nothing, but learned to work her way around those men, learned to identify those who could help her, if she offered certain things to them. And, the more offerings she left to Loki, the more things seemed to go her way- the more clever she became. That ended with her being allowed to serve the feasts in the Great Hall, and now, she would be Queen. Loki would be receiving a very excellent offering the next day.

If she’d known how he thought of her, that Ivar believed her to be the most genuine person he’d ever known, she’d feel for him. He deserved to have known someone who was truly genuine, not only genuine to him. Which, Freydis had been fully genuine with Ivar, had hidden nothing from him. She just wondered how those who had known her before would take this development. A dark part of her hoped they would be afraid.

“We will be the most perfect couple in all Midgard,” she told him, grinning and leaning into him. “And I am the most blessed woman, to be marrying such a perfect husband.”

Her hand lifted to brush through Ivar’s hair, and she gave a soft hum. “The Gods have brought us together, Ivar,” she told him. “They have plans for us. We are the future of Kattegat, the future of your father’s people, and whatever there is for us to accomplish, we will do it together.” She settled bad against him once more. “This much I know.”

[ghxst-queen]

ivar-the-boneless​:

Ivar was convinced that the Gods had meant for them to get together. It seemed that they orchestrated everything for them to meet this night. It was a celebration after all, Ivar was more confident in himself than he’d ever felt before. They’d been triumphant in battle and he was home and was finally feeling comfortable as his role being King. He’d felt like he’d accomplished something great and that Kattegat finally recognized that he could be a capable King.

They saw the struggles that both he and Freydis had went through to get to this night and all the pain and suffering had paid off. Ivar was relieved to be able to make Freydis a free woman. He’d wanted to free her from the moment she arrived in Kattegat and he was finally able to do that for her. 

It would infuriate Ivar to know that he’d been the most loving man in her life. She deserved only happiness and he was going do everything in his power as King to give her that happiness. It would take a lot of self control for him to allow Freydis to address whatever men from her past that needed to be dealt with. He knew what happened to slaves in Kattegat frequently and he hated it.

Hearing her giggle was like music to his ears. He couldn’t help but smile widely and lean his head against hers. “Of course my darling. I would never make you address the people of Kattegat alone, especially as my new Queen.” he said happily. “Well- we will have some time to think things through… though I believe something outdoors, in the evening or when the sun’s just gone down.” he said smiling “though I really don’t care how we’re married… just that we are.”

@ghxst-queen

Just as Ivar was convinced, so too was Freydis. As much as she wished they could have come together sooner, now knowing how perfect it felt to be with him, and how good it was, she knew the Gods planned things the way they did for a reason. For all she knew, they might not have connected in quite the same way, had things not gone exactly as they had. Perhaps Ivar would not have been so confident in reaching out to her, and perhaps she would not have been so eager to offer herself to him.

Not that she’d have ever doubted herself in doing so. Freydis had loved Ivar from a distance for years, and so the chance to be with him, even for only a night, was something she’d have thrown herself into. All of this which came with it... This could only be a blessing from the Gods.

She had suffered much in her life, before coming to be with Ivar, and she could only believe they were now giving both of them something good. This was their reward, for all the pains and trials and tribulations and hardships. And that made everything, every moment they would share into the future, all the better, and all the sweeter.

Freydis beamed when he pressed his head to hers, and she leaned into him, nuzzling against his head. “I feel joy at the thought of standing at your side,” she told him honestly. “Both in Kattegat, and in front of the Völva who will marry us.” Another giggle left her as she pictured herself, and Ivar, being married. It wasn’t a difficult thing to picture, especially with the images he had given her, and so she nodded, smiling. “Yes,” she agreed. “I like the sound of a wedding at sunset, out in the forest.” She gave a hum, looking up into his face. “I think the setting sun would look beautiful on your face.”

[ghxst-queen]

ivar-the-boneless​:

No one besides the Seer and maybe Floki, would have been able to forsee Ivar picking Freydis to be his wife and Queen. He’d kept his attractions quiet and to himself- he didn’t need his brothers making fun of him for liking a woman when he’d never be able to fully be with them… something he was relieved wasn’t the case anymore. 

He knew that Freydis would be able to take on the responsibilities of Queen of Kattegat. She knew the inner workings of Kattegat, he assumed that she would have a number of suggestions on how to make things better for the people of Kattegat. He wanted the people happy, he wanted them to see that he was going to do things to better their home… this was his home as well and the success of Kattegat meant a lot to him. 

He took being King very seriously despite what some people might think. Sure he was a ‘younger’ King, but it didn’t mean that he would carelessly rule over  the only home he’d ever known. Though many still gave him that look of fear- the look that started the day he axed another little boy for excluding him. He never wanted Freydis to give him that look. 

Ivar’s blue eyes met hers as she sat up and looked down at him, his eyes slightly closing for a second as her hand trailed from his chest to his cheek. He took a slow deep breath and then met her gaze again. Her words were touching and made his heart race slightly. He loved how confident she sounded in them, it was relieving to hear her thoughts. “I love you too.” he said softly once she settled back against him having allowed her words to settle over him. “You are a gift from the Gods Freydis..”

Ivar’s eyes closed again as she traced over his tattoos. He let a soft hum fall from him and he let his own hand gently brush over her back. “We can and will face the world together.” he said smiling and leaning his head on hers. “Speaking of- how would you like to address Kattegat on our intentions? What kind of wedding do you want?” he asked feeling an excitement come to him.

@ghxst-queen

It still surprised Freydis to know how Ivar felt for her, that he had been interested in her for so long. Had she known before, when they were younger, of course she’d have approached him, but she couldn’t help but wonder how that approach may have differed. Odds were, she’d have at least been far more comfortable trying to instigate a relationship with him.

And after all, why shouldn’t she have done? Any woman who was to be a Queen could be afraid of no man. If Freydis was as unafraid as she claimed to be, and she was, then instigating a relationship with Ivar would have been something she’d have been comfortable doing. The only reason she hadn’t done so, was that she hadn’t believed she’d had a chance. Why waste one’s energy on something that can’t be?

However, now of course she knew it could be. No, she knew more than that. She knew it would be. She would marry the King of Kattegat, be Queen, and love him until her final breath. Never could she imagine herself looking at him with fear, certainly not now that she had seen this side of him. He was, by far, the most loving man she’d ever known.

Some might have argued that meant she couldn’t have known very many loving men, and while that was true, laying in his arms she doubted that much difference could ever be made in her judgement on this. His words brought a warm smile to her lips, and she turned her head to press a kiss to his chest. Surely, he was her gift from the Gods as well, a sign that she had done well in their sight, and that she had their favour. After all, why else would they bless her with a marriage which would be so full of love?

Freydis had fallen in love with the feeling of his hands on her skin in just one night, and the feeling of it made her feel warmed from the inside out. His question made her giggle, that same excitement bubbling up in her. “I would like to address them at your side, of course,” she teased. “And for our wedding...” Just thinking about it made a happy giggle leave her. “Gods, I never imagined planning my wedding. What would you like, do you think?”

[ghxst-queen]

ivar-the-boneless​:

Ivar had a lot of possible suitors- he got letters in the mail almost daily from different noblemen wanting a King for their son in law. He always hated that he even had to address them because he didn’t want anyone other than Freydis. Despite what happened years ago with Margarethe- that pull towards Freydis never disappeared. He never felt that same pull with anyone else- it was uniquely Freydis. The thought of being with anyone else never crossed his mind and he’d always shut down conversations of finding a wife with quips about being ‘too busy’. 

He couldn’t wait to tell the world of his intentions with Freydis. He already knew that Freydis was going to be an amazing Queen. The way she made him feel about himself was already making him view things differently. He’d never had someone worth protecting- it was always just him. Sure he cared about his brothers and they would miss him if anything happened to him… but he didn’t have anyone depending on him until now… he didn’t have anyone to love him in this way, until now.

He let his eyes close when she started to trace over his tattoos. He enjoyed her gentle touches over the the inked designs. Ivar realized in this moment that he was practically touch-starved. He craved this tender moment and never wanted it to end. He had been smothered by his mother and humiliated by Margarethe when he was younger… so he started to distance himself from everyone. He had conditioned himself into a true Viking… fighting in wars on the front line where touch could mean death. That had become his reality and he didn’t realize that he was missing out on that much. 

Her words again warmed his heart. He didn’t understand how she could be this perfect to him. It felt almost like it was too good to be true- but he wasn’t going to let himself ruin the first genuinely good thing to happen in his life. “I hope to never make you afraid of me… you are precious to me and you are my world now Freydis. You and if the Gods bless us with a child.” he said moving his hand to rest on her stomach, deep down hoping that he was able to give her a child at some point. He’d beg the Gods every night for the rest of his life for a child to show just how much he wanted to be a father. 

“I feel like I’ve won at life.” he said smiling slightly “You’ve given me something so precious Freydis. You’ve made me understand the worth of life… before it was only me against the world. Always fighting for myself and never for anyone else… because that was how I thought life was going to be for me.” he kissed her temple gently and ran his hand over her side. “Now everything has changed because you’ve opened my eyes… made my world a little bigger.”

Understandably, Freydis had always believed Ivar would find a Queen one day, and she never truly believed it would be her. She’d fantasize about it sometimes, imagine how it would have been to be his Queen, to have his attentions on her and to be able to give him her own attentions. Knowing he’d not yet found a Queen, she would sometimes let herself believe, even if only for a few moments, that maybe, just maybe, she would somehow be blessed enough to end up being his Queen. Of course, now she was his Queen, or would be, and she no longer had to imagine anything.

The thought thrilled her. Being Queen wasn’t going to be an easy task, Freydis was well aware of that, but in all honesty? She wasn’t afraid. She wanted to love Ivar, and be loved by Ivar, as his wife. Some may have been afraid of this sort of life, but not her. Those who did fear this would have been likely to say, perhaps, they wanted only to be his lover, never his wife. But that wasn’t the sort of woman Freydis was. If being his wife meant being Queen of Kattegat, or meant living on some farm somewhere, struggling to get by, she would take either life. Whatever meant she married him.

She didn’t know how touchstarved Ivar was, didn’t know how little he had allowed himself over the years. Of course she’d heard about what had happened with Margrethe, and even tonight, he hadn’t believed he could be with her, be able to love her as many other men would have been able to do. She’d shown him the truth, though, that he could love her, and could do so incredibly. And now that they had done what they had, now that it was possible they could be parents within the year, Freydis was happy to lay with him, and show him another kind of love- the quiet affection which came in the aftermath of such intense intimacy. This was also intimate in its own way, though just as intensely so.

As good as his skin felt beneath her fingers, his words gave her pause, and her hand stilled, opting instead to rest flatly against his chest. She pushed herself up a little, so she was looking down at Ivar, and her hand moved up his body, coming to rest against his jaw. She smiled at him adoringly. “You could not make me afraid of you, my love,” she told him honestly. “Just as you say I have become your world, you have become mine. Along with any family we are one day blessed with. I adore you, Ivar, I love you with all my heart, and no matter what, I will not be afraid. The Gods will sustain me, as will you.”

Freydis settled back in beside Ivar, letting her fingers begin tracing his tattoos once more. It was soothing to her, just as she hoped it would be soothing to him as well, and hearing his voice from her place in his bed warmed her heart. Instinctively, the young woman leaned into the kiss he pressed to her temple, and a happy sigh left her as he ran his own hand over her side. Yes, this was something she was happy to get used to. “You won’t be alone again,” she promised him. “Now, we can face the world together, whatever comes. Hm?”

[ghxst-queen]

ivar-the-boneless​:

Finding a woman to be his Queen was always something in the back of his mind. Hvitserk would tease him and harass him about finding a Queen frequently. He was never mean but he’d say something about it almost every day. Whenever he was drinking he’d be more bold and say rather loudly to just pick literally any woman and they’d be his Queen. He’d made an ass of himself once by pointing between women and asking them loudly if they would marry Ivar and be Queen if he asked them. Of course the women answered yes… how else do you answer a question like that? Ivar just apologized for Hvitserk’s outburst and sent him to bed.

He always wanted Freydis deep down and there were a couple of times Ivar almost told Hvitserk that when he was harassing him. Maybe they would have ended up together sooner,  but Ivar rather enjoyed how it happened naturally. The moment they locked eyes across the table Ivar knew that he was going to free her. He hadn’t anticipated making her his but his charismatic words fell from him before he could fully keep up- but he didn’t regret anything that had happened. How could he? 

Ivar knew nothing about relationships- his Father and Mother were more roommates that screwed every now and then. Ivar knew his Father had loved him and his brothers… but he’d been awake and lying in bed the day Ragnar couldn’t tell Aslaug he loved her. Ivar felt horrible for his mother… but it wasn’t all that surprising. Though having that image of his parents, mixed with the interactions he’d witnessed with his brothers and their flings… he didn’t have a lot to go on.

That partially made everything more exciting to him… it felt more genuine. His reactions weren’t fabricated to be like his brothers or like anyone else… they were purely Ivar. He felt like he could be the true person he wanted to be with Freydis… there was no hiding from her- at least he hoped that he wouldn’t try to… and hoped she wouldn’t let him. He’d spent so long being alone he didn’t even realize it- having her now he didn’t want to be the same anymore. 

He welcomed the change that came with his soon to be wife. He smiled softly at her statement. “Then we are divine.” he echoed back loving the way it had sounded leaving her lips. “I’ve done a lot to not deserve this kind of treatment. I won’t argue with how you see me, because it is not my opinion and I will not tell you how to feel or think. You are a free woman free to think whatever you would like.” he said gently. He didn’t feel like a God, he alway a saw himself as a burden.

Though now after he had defied every odd thrown at him, he considered her words. He wasn’t suppose to live past his first night- no one like him had survived as a Viking before and yet he wasn’t just surviving he was thriving. A Crippled King who could walk on his own two feet- a complete savage to be feared in battle and a proven tactical genius. He caressed her cheek lightly “Though I won’t agree to being their most perfect creation. That is you. Has always been you in my eyes.”

@ghxst-queen

Freydis had witnessed that outburst of Hvitserk’s. Of course, she’d been working the feast where it had happened, and so wasn’t in his lineup of women. Had she been, she’d have answered yes both emphatically and honestly, but apparently, that simply hadn’t been how the Gods had willed it. She’d found herself giggling at how Ivar handled the situation, but it had certainly gotten her thinking. Would he be willing to marry a woman who came from no specific social standing? She doubted he’d have chosen a slave- though obviously, she was now proven wrong- but part of her had wondered a bit if she couldn’t have found herself a way to be freed.

Being freed by Ivar the way she had, that wasn’t anything like what she had expected. She’d wondered a little if he would want... something from her. It wasn’t that she held that opinion of Ivar, that he was the sort to sleep with a slave, simply because she was a slave and couldn’t say no, but she knew many men were the types, especially at a feast, to at least try. After all, how many hands had she had to push off herself when ale was flowing freely around her? Her freedom had been a very happy surprise.

As had the relationship been. For her, Ivar had always been someone she’d been interested in having more with, more than just a King-Slave sort of relationship. Gods, to think of it that way, it really was a miracle, or just the will of the Gods, that she was now in his bed, was now his lover, was now to be his wife. Her love for him was reciprocated, and she could feel that from him, even as she laid and let her fingers run over his skin, tracing the dark lines of his tattoos over his chest.

She could feel the genuineness of the relationship they shared, of the love between them. Out of nowhere, any wall she had built to protect herself had been pulled down by him. She didn’t feel the need to defend herself from him, not in any way. In fact, she thought if there was one person there in Kattegat she could trust with all of her heart, it was him. And that was very fortunate, considering he would be her husband. Having a husband she could trust felt like a blessing from the Gods themselves.

Hearing Ivar agree with her, that they were divine, she grinned at him and nodded. His words after made her brows crease together in a display of concern, however, and she moved so that she was leaning against him, looking down into his face. Her beautiful Ivar. The man she was going to be blessed to have at her side for the rest of her life. “I don’t care what you have done, or what you have not,” she told him honestly. “I care who you are, and in my eyes, you are the most wonderful man I have ever known.”

Ivar was absolutely incredible. He was a genius, he was brave, driven, ambitious, not to mention how truly beautiful he was. She smiled softly as she brought her hand up to run her fingers over his jaw, her touch gentle and delicate, as if he were something so precious she wouldn’t risk breaking him. She couldn’t risk it. “Ivar, you have always amazed me. And you amaze me again by confessing that you have wanted me and loved me so long, when I thought I was alone in these feelings. But instead, I am blessed with you.”

[ghxst-queen]

ivar-the-boneless​:

Ivar realized that he would have to change most of his plans moving forward and it didn’t bother him in the slightest. He never thought that he would find a woman that actually wanted to be with him. Freydis had come at such a pivotal moment and he was glad to not be alone anymore. He hoped this meant that they never had to be alone again- that they would always have each other. 

He couldn’t wait to fully shower her in his affection. He didn’t care what the world thought of their relationship- he was a changed man. She’d come into his life at the right time- it was love at first sight and Ivar couldn’t ignore the instant connection they had. He didn’t think for a second that she had any hidden agenda. It just felt real to him… it was the realest thing that he’d ever felt. 

He was prepared to be his true self with Freydis- something that he’d kept hidden away from almost everyone. He didn’t want to hide anymore, he didn’t want to keep pretending that he was indifferent and heartless… because he wasn’t. He cared deeply for a lot of things which is why he came off harsh at times. 

Freydis had no idea what his plans had been, if she had thrown anything off or not. She figured there would be some things which needed to change now, but most Kings wanted a Queen. All this meant was that he, perhaps, had found one before he’d searched. The Gods worked in strange ways, Freydis was fully aware. Perhaps this was simply their way of bringing Ivar the Queen he was meant to rule alongside.

But the most truly exciting thing, in her mind, was getting to live this life with Ivar. She loved him, truly, and she wanted to show him that as day and day went by. He might not be surprised after spending this night with her, but Freydis was a fairly physically affectionate person- when she truly felt affection for someone. Unless he told her otherwise, she was likely to be at his side at all times, somehow having her hands on him.

That was just... who she was. She was used to not indulging this side of herself, of course, having previously been a slave. But now, she was free to love him however she was inclined to do. Not from afar, not subtly, but fully, completely, and freely. What a beautiful things the Gods had given to her, in giving her a love and life with Ivar the Boneless.

Like him, Freydis had also experienced much that night she had never experienced before. For instance, she had experienced love. Watching him, being with him, had made her feel more beautiful and more loved than she ever had in her entire life. How could she have any doubt in her mind that the Gods had made them for each other?

She smiled softly at the feeling of the kiss he gave her on her head, at the feeling of his hand on her hip, and she turned to press a soft kiss to his chest in return. Her head tilted up then so she could look at him, her heart still pounding in her chest. What a perfect man she was taking as her husband. King or not, she would never turn him away.

His words made her smile widely, and she even gave a small, happy giggle. “Then we are divine,” she told him. “Perhaps Ragnarök has already come, and we were Gods in another life, now safely resting in Midgard.” Her hand reached up to cup his cheek, her thumb brushing over his skin before she turned her hand and ran the back of it over his skin as well. “I look at you as you deserve, Ivar. You are the most perfect man I have ever seen, or ever known. If we have not been Gods before, then surely the Gods were very careful when they made you. You are their most perfect creation.”

[muzaiii-archive-blog]

don’t ship with me bc if i know you do angst then i’ll literally hurt you on purpose and then laugh about it

[ghxst-queen]

ivar-the-boneless​:

Ivar was sure that he would spend many days thinking about all the time that they missed out on. He could have freed her the whole time- Bjorn had freed a slave and married her. Ivar just needed the confidence to do so and unfortunately it took him a while to find it.  

He knew there was nothing he could do about the past though. He couldn’t change what had already happened but he could plan for their future. He promised her that he would love her unconditionally and be forever faithful to her. He never wanted another woman- Freydis made him feel more alive than he’d ever felt before. He would be completely hers until she didn’t want him anymore… and even if she chose to leave him he doubted he’d ever feel this connection with another. 

Ivar was excited to learn absolutely everything about Freydis. He wanted to know how she ended up as a slave, how she ended up in Kattegat, what her dreams were, and even the simple things like favorite color. He’d never cared enough about anyone to ask about those things. He frankly didn’t care- but with Freydis everything she said meant something to him. 

For Freydis, she didn’t exactly want to focus on the ‘could have been’s. Life may have been different if she hadn’t met Ivar exactly how she had. And, the truth was, she was quite happy with how things were going. Why bother wondering about something that didn’t make her as happy as this?

Ivar made Freydis feel as though she were the happiest woman in all of Midgard. Truly, the Gods had blessed her with him, and it was perfect. What they now had was perfect. There was no man that she would trade Ivar for, either willingly or unwillingly. She wanted to love him, and be loved by him, until the end of her life. If he were to ever leave her, her heart would be broken. Perhaps it would repair, but she never wanted it to have to. She would always be his, until she took her last breath in this world.

As such, she wanted to know all she could about her new lover, and soon to be husband. Everything that brought him happiness, anything that saddened him. Whatever made Ivar Ivar, she wanted to learn. After all, she would be spending the rest of her life with him, wouldn’t she be? It seemed that was an important thing for her to know.

Her climax had been far from faked, even though she had certainly faked it for other men, those she just wanted to be done with quickly. But with Ivar, there had been no need to fake any pleasure. Every breath and every moan he had drawn out of her that night had been genuine, and she certainly looked forward to such a time as he pulled those sounds from her again.

It filled her with joy also to realise Ivar had reached his own climax. Before this, Freydis had always thought Ivar was the most handsome man she’d ever laid eyes on, but now, she knew it to be true. The pleasure she had seen wash over his face made her heart skip a beat, stop, and melt in her chest, all at once. Just from watching him, she had fallen in love with him again, and even more deeply, were that possible.

His words brought a soft giggle from her, and she wrapped herself up around him as best she could. “Then I must be a Goddess,” she agreed. “Because you are a God, I have no doubt. But you bless me with your love, Ivar. I am in love with you. I have been for some time now, and though I cannot say how I lived without you, either, I take comfort in this: We will never have to live without each other again. Just as I am yours, you are mine, now. And this will never change.”

[ghxst-queen]

ivar-the-boneless​:

Every part of Ivar wished he’d tried to talk to her sooner- knowing that she felt the same the whole time. Knowing that they danced around each other- each being too shy to talk to the other. Ivar knew why she didn’t try before. It was a risk, he couldn’t blame her for that. He could have definitely made the effort. He did try a few times but chickened out.

They were both still young and Ivar knew that they would thrive together. That she would motivate him to do great things, to be a great man… the great man that he knew deep down he could be. He hoped to motivate her to be whoever she wanted to be. He would support her no matter what.

He knew that there would be people who doubted Freydis and Ivar could be in love… having only “just met” but it didn’t feel like that. He felt like he’d known her for years… like she was this part of him that he didn’t realize was lost. He had her now and couldn’t let go. He felt happy. Truly happy with no strings attached for the first time since he was young.

Had Ivar succeeded in talking to her sooner, Freydis would have been very happy to have pursued whatever came of that. At such a young age, there had been a risk involved in being a slave, trying to talk to the Prince of Kattegat. But now that she was to be his Queen, she wondered what might have happened if she took that risk.

Not that it was all that relevant, really. She was with Ivar now. They had their entire lives ahead of them, to rule Kattegat together, and to raise their children who they would pass the Kingdom down to one day. What more could she have asked for?

And who was to say things would have turned out like this, had they approached each other sooner? The length of time Freydis had watched Ivar had added to how well she felt she knew him. And as well as she felt she knew him, it wasn’t hard at all to say she loved him. She had loved him from a distance for some time now. This change only meant she could love him better.

The way Ivar held her made Freydis just want to melt into him. In such an intimate moment, she had never felt so safe as she felt with him. He was strong, stronger than anyone else she had ever known, and he was the only one who made her feel so cared for. He was the only one who held her close, and clearly wanted this with her. Her heart melted to consider how she wasn’t just a body to use for pleasure to him.

His responses to her climax only further proved the way he felt for her, in her opinion. He seemed so invested in her climax, in making sure she reached that release, and to hear what he thought of her in that moment, that she was beautiful to him... She grinned up at him breathlessly, a hand sliding up into his hair. “You are also beautiful, Ivar,” she whispered. “You make me feel loved, and I also love you. Surely, you are the Gods’ answer to my prayers for salvation.” And once more, she surrendered to the moment.

More moans came from her as she felt him reach his climax inside her, felt him filling her in the best way. It felt so warm, and so perfect with him. She didn’t feel used this time. She felt whole. And it felt incredible to watch him come undone above her, to hear the way he sounded as he did so. She’d never been so entranced by that sight as she was with him.

With anyone else, this would be relief to her, relief that this would be done soon, and while with Ivar it was still a relief in a way, it was a very different sort of relief. With Ivar, it was relief that he had reached this peak, done what he had begun this night believing to be impossible. It was relief that he had trusted her enough to show him what was possible. It was relief that she was his now, and he was hers, as she turned to curl up against his side, her hand grasping his tightly, and relief as she laid her head on his chest and replied, “And you are a God, Ivar.”

[ghxst-queen]

ivar-the-boneless​:

Ivar was in complete awe of Freydis. She was striking to him- Floki made fun of him so much that Ivar was sure someone would say something… but he always kept it between them. The taunts being so playful but they had mortified the young Ragnarsson only because he just wasn’t ready to actually act on those feelings… he hadn’t been ready until the feast apparently.

He acted on such an impulse, which was rather unlike him. Every move he made was precise and calculated after he returned from England… though with Freydis that was the opposite. He had a vague plan but it wasn’t anything like his usual plans. That would usually make him uneasy- but with Freydis nothing had made him that uncomfortable. That was all but forgotten at this point, she’d been only loving and encouraging.

Ivar wanted nothing more than to be adored. He wanted enemies to fear him not his own people. He wanted them to know he would be loyal to those who were loyal to him and a complete terror to those who threatened them in any way. He couldn’t wait to show the world the beautiful woman that was going to be his wife and Queen. He wanted to show the world how amazing she was and how much he loved her.

He’d never imagined that he’d actually find someone that he loved. It was strange how suddenly he couldn’t see his life without Freydis. He didn’t care what anyone else thought because he knew deep down that what they had was real. If it was the will of the Gods or not, he knew he loved her and he could tell that she felt the same and it’d forever be one of the most special nights of his life.

He focused on meeting her hips, focusing on her sounds of pleasure, the way her hands clung to him- it was driving him insane and within moments a sharp shaky gasp feel from him and his entire body started to tremble violently. He swore under his breath a couple of times “I’m really close Freydis... Gods you drive me insane.”)

If Freydis had ever heard about how Floki teased Ivar, she’d have found it adorable. Something about hearing the now high and mighty King of Kattegat be teased over a crush, over her, would have overjoyed her. She’d have been stunned that she had been what he was being teased about, but perhaps then she’d have tried to talk to him sooner.

There was no telling what might have happened, had she done so. Many days, she’d watched him, wanted to go to him sooner. Had she done so, she wondered if he’d have received her well? She liked to think he would have done, liked to think they’d have been happy together, just much sooner. Freydis was often one to plan things too, but for happiness with Ivar, she’d be happy to leave her plans to the wayside, and see what the Gods had planned.

Now that she was with Ivar, she adored him. She didn’t have to do so from a distance any longer, either. Freydis was free to give her adoration to him in person. Free to show him just how much he was loved. And there was no doubt in her mind that she had his loyalty, just as he had hers. If the people wouldn’t see who he truly was through his interactions with her... then she would be convinced they were blind, and wanted to see him as something else.

Well, that would be their loss, then. Though she knew it wouldn’t be easy on Ivar, if they never came to trust him, to love him as a father to them all, like their beloved Odin, just because his legs didn’t work the same as any other man’s. She saw who Ivar was, saw how- if anyone deserved it- he was so deserving of the people’s love. He was the best man she’d ever known. Who was more deserving than he?

Freydis felt her own breath catch in her throat when she heard his do so. The way he shook as that shiver ran down his spine made her gasp and moan beneath him. And even watching him bite his lip, Gods, was there nothing he did which didn’t make him the most attractive man put on Midgard? Apparently not, because as he moaned, and moaned his name, she watched his eyes fall shut, and reached up to take his face between her hands, kissing him desperately.

She could tell from how his body was moving that he was getting close, and she moaned against him, her back arching so that her chest pressed against his. His words came as no surprise to her, and she grinned. “I- I am close as well, my love,” she panted out. And the truth was, she was closer than she knew, because it wasn’t long after that that she cried his name again, and clung to him. Her climax crashed over her harder than she’d ever experienced, and her eyes slipped shut, her mouth hanging open.

As she came down from her high, she looked up at him with adoring eyes, moving her body once more with his to help him reach his climax as well. “You,” she managed. “You are perfect. It is true what I told you. Ivar, you are a God.”

[ghxst-queen]

ivar-the-boneless​:

Ivar was in awe by Freydis’ beauty. She was stunning in every way to Ivar. Everything about her made his heart race and that is how it has always been. Since the first moment he saw her he was captivated. Now that he was with her he realized he truly loved everything about her - the way she spoke, the way she carried herself, her attitude, her overall beauty in general. She was like a Goddess to Ivar. Even in this moment they were sharing right now, he was convinced that she was sent by the Gods. 

If Ivar was forced to go back to endure all the pain and hardship that he had in his life all over again to get to Freydis he would. It was would be worth it because he knew it was all worth it now. The young King suddenly didn’t care about how much struggle and hardship he went through because it simply didn’t matter anymore. The only thing that mattered to him now was their future. 

He wanted the world to look at Freydis and see her as the beautiful, strong woman that she was. He was excited to get her fitted into better clothing- he couldn’t wait to see what she wanted to dress in. He understood the slaves wore what they were given- but now she was in charge. 

Freydis had always been captivated by Ivar. His eyes had been the first thing she’d ever noticed about him. They’d been such a vibrant shade of blue, and she hadn’t ever forgotten how they’d looked. From that day, she’d known she would have given anything to have those eyes on her, looking into her own eyes. But now, now she had all of him focused on her. His eyes, his voice, his ears, his hands, his heart... All were hers, and she was the happiest woman in the world. He was like a god in her eyes, how could she not be?

She, too, would do everything again to be at his side once more- though, perhaps she would change a thing or two. She might have approached him sooner, might have offered him her heart long ago. (It had been his since she first saw him, but doubted he’d known it until this night.) But they were together now, and their future was all that counted.

And now, she could look forward to the day that the world would see him as she did. Strong, brave, wise, intelligent... like a god. Perhaps, even, he might be seen so wonderfully that people would stop making fun of him for what his legs were. Ivar the Boneless could become...

Ivar the God.

His smile brought a wide grin from her. Her heart pounded as she watched him, and Gods, did she feel incredible. She felt as if there existed no other woman in the world but her, as if she were all that existed to him. Truly, he had succeeded not only in pleasuring her- far beyond what she knew pleasure could be- and in making her feel far more special than she had ever known she could feel.

But love did that, didn’t it? Love made one feel as though nothing existed beyond that love- especially when one was making love. She could believe, with every word he said, and the way he suddenly began to move more intensely, began to chase that peak, that there was no Kattegat outside their door.

The closer they each came to that release, the more Freydis wanted desperately all that came from it. She rocked her hips in time with his, matching his new pace, and when he spoke once more to her she answered first with a soft cry of his name. “Ivar-!” Her senses were overwhelmed with him, with need of him, with need of... “You,” she finally moaned out. “I need you, Ivar. I need you to fill me with your seed.” She turned her head back toward him once more, as she spoke once more. “Let me give you a child, Ivar.”

Her hands clung to his shoulders, and with every move, she felt her release growing closer and closer. It wouldn’t be long now before Ivar made Freydis come apart beneath him.