ngl i was genuinely expecting something like this
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@giatrinket
ngl i was genuinely expecting something like this
Your partner came back from the dead after being missing for decades. Every one of their friends who they went with ended up dying a horrible death.
Now, somehow, their entire mental health is based on the continued life and happiness of this fairground goldfish that they picked up.
Neither of you know the first thing about how to care for even a healthy fish. This fish has been poorly cared for, has multiple diseases and the person who handed it over explicitly didn't expect it to live nearly as long as it already has.
You're frantically googling how to set up a fish tank, where to buy fish food, can you even take a fish to the vet? Your partner wants you to know that they're happy they made it home and survived their horrific ordeal, but also that if anything happens to the fish then they're going to kill everyone on this planet and then themself.
You're honestly wondering if you're even helping the fish, or just prolonging its suffering, but your partner will only accept medical help for their many injuries or engage in basic self-care once they're confident that the fish is being looked after.
So you get a tank. You set up a filter and all that stuff. You learn way more than you ever wanted to know about water temperature and ph and nitrate levels. The fish is safe. You start to develop some affection for the little guy. Your partner begins to recover. The fish begins to recover.
Which is when you learn that in its 'healthy' state, the fish regularly refuses to sleep when tired, keeps begging for food that is obviously unhealthy for it (and struggling to eat the food that you do provide because “it tastes gross”), and continually tries to persuade your partner to take it out of its nice safe tank so it can go explore the wonderful world of Outside, where the slightest mishap will kill it instantly.
Your name is Adrian, and you kind of wants to strangle this fucking fish, statement.
atlas
love between vampires can be one thing, or it can be countless things. however you want me, i can be that for you. you said you want me to be present as your maker? i can be a maker for you. i want to be your maker. disregard the last 500 years in which i was repulsed by the idea. i don't have any complicated feelings about that at all. you said you want cool vampire powers even though you're a three year old fledgling? i can help you become a daywalker, a skill that apparently takes centuries to develop. you're an investigative journalist, don't you want a scandal on lestat? i can give you a scandal. i want to help you finish that job. lestat fucks his mom. isn't that good? aren't i useful? aren't i worth keeping around?
I feel for everyone who isn’t having the time of their fucking lives with The Vampire Lestat. Every week I clap and cheer for the antics of the world’s saddest buzzword-laden bisexual crash-out diva and his crew of the least healed men to ever grace the small screen. The songs are cringe delightfully camp, the wigs are a nightmare, I’m living my best life, I’m loving every second. Why the fuck would you have a blood shower in your tour bus. The onscreen mother-son incest is only like the third wildest thing happening in any given episode. It’s insane. I never want it to end
Currently moved to procreate in the meantime because my laptop decided to implode on itself but that won’t stop me from my yaoi time
I’m slowly understanding how to draw this rock
the human body when you use it and exist in it
let him speak….
"but they hate eachother" "this ship makes no sense" "that would never be canon" "they're only friends" "but one of them is already dating someone" "they'd be toxic together" don't caaaare I'm consuming media of them being insane about each other and falling in love in situations you couldn't fathom
do not ever speak to me about "unethical" ships if you've never heard of my good personal friend jack harkness and his incredibly clever tests
This is the FUNNIEST SHIT I HAVE EVER SEEN
Reblogging for cultural enrichment
bout time I brought back the Laurel and Hardy flex tape-
From The Killers, 1946. A Film Noir Classic
I’m an archivist, behold my growing collection was of old photos mirroring timeless memes I’ve come across at various places I’ve worked.
dm aside that entire daniel/armand exchange was so funny because “did you actually not get tortured by me?? was none of it real???” “noo babe ofc you tortured me, you tortured me so well you’re so good at torture”
im making a nirvana the band the show t-shirt by adding words to a nirvana shirt. I've never painted clothes with bleach before (and it shows), and i got a little upset with how it's turning out at first but then i remembered that those losers would probably do an even worse job so I'm okay. it actually kinda fits the concept of the series i guess
decided to add the final result picture. i actually really like how it turned out. a little self-conscious about wearing something i customised outside, but i still really like it
got a lovehate relationship with routine and repetition. yes if you put me in a repetitive situation i will start chewing on myself like a caged animal. but also no if you interrupt my self imposed routines i will start crying. this has made me so super good at being in the workforce #trust
clingy grace
I'm a time traveller from the 20th century. I travelled 26 years into the future to deliver this message. At a speed of 1 year per year