I woke up in my own room, but everything was different. The walls were purple, the furniture had been moved, an old painting I'd forgotten even existed, hung on the wall. My gaze drifted to the turning doorknob of my bathroom. Someone had been using it. Well, whoever it was had a shit load of explaining to do. The door opened and what I saw, got me even more confused. The person whom I saw exiting the bathroom was me. What a weird dream, I thought to myself as I pinched my wrist. The pain made me wince, but I didn't wake up. I just continued watching myself doing what seemed normal. The other me never even noticed my presence. (I'll just call her Amna to make things simpler) She was so much prettier, and she looked older. I wanted to figure out what was happening so I leaned in close and saw the date on her phone. The year was 2015. Three years into the future. By now I was trembling with fear and anxiety. I tried talking to her, but she couldn't hear a word I said. I followed her out of the room and downstairs where she was all playful and annoying and she made everyone laugh. This version of me was so much better than I could ever be. I was frustrated after my failed attempts at getting any of them to notice me. Ami, Abu, Fati and Zara seemed so much happier with her. I watched her go on with her everyday routine. This one did her chores. Okay, she's just too perfect, I thought miserably. I followed Amna back to her room-or my room, or our room-and made myself comfortable on the old couch I hated. I noticed how fixated she was to her phone, it was almost creepy. Her expressions were sad when she was alone. What could possibly make her sad? She was living the perfect life. That thought left me as soon as I watched her get a pack of cigarettes from her bag and went to the bathroom. I'm gonna start smoking in the future? Hell no! This is not what I expected to happen next. I wanted to unravel more mysteries about this futuristic version of myself, so I snooped. While she was in the bathroom-SMOKING- I checked her phone, read her conversations. I thanked God Hiba was still my best friend. There was another. Fozia! The girl who goes to my college. We don't even talk! Okay, so, I found out from the conversations that this 22 year old Amna, wasn't as perfect as she seemed. She smoked, did drugs and was kind of an attention seeking whore. I went with her to her university the next day, where all she did was hang out with Hiba and a few guys and smoked up, and said the weirdest things. She was out of control. She never took her classes and focused all her energy on looking nice for others. If she liked someone, she'd let them do anything to her. I observed her for days and then came the day she went with Hiba and a guy friend to a place where they had drinks. It was her first time drinking, and after just one glass, she lost all control. She kept repeating a guy's name and whining about how he blocked her and how she always woke up crying-which I witnessed. So, while Hiba was in the bathroom, the male friend whom she naively trusted, tried having sex with her against her will. She kept yelling at him to get off of her, but by the time Hiba got back, he had her pants pulled down. Thankfully, hiba pushed him off her and pulled her pants back up while Amna kept rambling. This was too much. I didn't understand why I was doing this to myself. I've seen myself cry in front of the mirror, talking to God. Why can't I find peace? What I'm seeing right now is not comforting at all. She's making jokes out of what almost happened, but I can see how afraid she is-of herself- and she should be. I want to shake her, tell her to snap out of it. I just hope I survive this.
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