and just like that, yukako sucked in a sharp breath ( something she probably shouldnât have done ) at his statement  ââ heâŠÂ he had a crush on her too? no, she liked him long before he had, she knew that. right now, she simply couldnât believe that she had gathered all of her courage and told him upfront that she liked him on that day, face red and all. let alone face him for most of the time.
yukako found herself feeling pressed when he didnât stare at him ( the intensity in his eyes, telling her that she neednât be afraidâŠÂ  how  formidable yet gentle! ), yet at a loss of words when she did.  yukako  can  see the  intensity  in  his  eyes  lessen while he looked at her,  and  that  soothed her  quite  a  bit.  it  was  great  to  know  that  he  had  his  own  means  of  persuasion ( another thing about him to write about in her treasured diary ).
both  eyebrows  raise in unison once  either  side  of  his  lips  curved  upwards,  and  he  began  laughing.  it  was  unexpected  and  for  some  reason,  it  made  her  lax  and  embarrassed,  all  at  once.  he  did  so  well  in  making  her  emotions  contradict  each otherâŠÂ and  just  like  that,  a  heap  of  weight  fell  off  of  her  shoulders,  like  a  lifted  curse.
â yesâŠÂ â still, she view his insight as something bad. â iâm  sorryâŠÂ â
         âN-NO, DONâT APOLOGIZE!â And as quickly as he felt his laughter bubbling up it disappears. As quickly as he figured heâd finally said something poignant and worthy of consideration ( embarrassing to admit with how simple it all was, but he was proud of it, it was his own breakthrough! ) heâs stuttering once and all control seems to diffuse. Not for the first time, Koichi remembers how far out of his depth he is, and almost pines for simpler days when he at least had the illusion of control over... over anything.
         He clears his throat and tries again, and the pause between his last words and now stretches out as though Yukako is waiting on him with bated breath, counting on him to say something positive to lead into-- into something normal.
         âI guess thatâs why we have to figure it out together...? Neither of us know anything, but nothing can really surprise us anymore, so... we really donât have anywhere to go but up.â
           Koichi is inwardly groaning with how utterly lame it sounds and the back of his neck feels as though itâs on fire. His smile is drawn thin but still there; his hand shifts, briefly lets go of Yukakoâs for as long as it takes to instead gingerly twine their fingers together.
         ...He sounds like someoneâs father on a television show. Like his parents. He pointedly decides to stop thinking about that altogether.
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