Glee

[gleekquote]

“Quinn: Somewhere in that pea brain of yours… is a man. Access him and tell him to prove to me that I chose the right guy to have a baby with”

— Gleequote: Quinn Fabray to Finn Hudson - 01x09 Wheels

[gleekquote]

“Kurt: We get it Mr. Schue. Everyone still hates us. So what? So we’re plankton on the high school food chain. The only difference now is that none of us really care.”

— Glee: Kurt Hummel to William Schuester - 02x01 Audition

[gleekquote]

Emma: I just got back from the emergency room. I had them give me four decontamination showers. I think they call that the full Silkwood. Will: What happened? Emma: Kurt was drunk and he ralphed on me. Not really fessing up to how he got the booze just yet, but I'm pretty sure it's not a fake I.D. because he looks like an eleven-year-old milkmaid. Will, I think it was April. Her backpack's always clinking with empties.

Glee: Emma Pillsbury and William Schuester - 01x05 The Rhodes Not Taken

[gleekquote]

Quinn: Did all the other kids start looking like food right before you fainted? Mercedes: Yeah. How'd you know? Quinn: Been there

Gleequote: Quinn Fabray and Mercedes Jones - 01x16 Home

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Sue: Let me be the one to break the silence. That was the most offensive thing I've seen in twenty years of teaching. And that includes an elementary school production of Hair.

Glee: Sue Sylvester - 01x02 Showmance

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Sue: So here's the deal. You do with your depressing little group of kids what I did with my wealthy elderly mother: Euthanize it. It's their time.

Glee: Sue Sylvester to William Schuester - 01x02 Showmance

[gleekquote]

Mercedes: The whole point of the club is about expressing what’s really inside you. Remember? Kurt: I can’t. Just not that confident, I guess…

Gleequote: Mercedes Jones and Kurt Hummel - 01x03 Acafellas

[gleekquote]

Brittany: Did you see what Rachel was wearing today? Santana’: Oh, I know! She looked like Pippi Longstocking, but like, Israeli.

Glee: Brittany Pierce and Santana Lopez - 01x14 Hell-O

[gleekquote]

Rachel: Can I ask you guys something private? Santana: Yes, you should move to Israel.

Glee: Rachel Berry and Santana Lopez - 01x15 The Power of Madonna

[gleekquote]

Will: I don’t have any more pep talks. I just have you guys. And the memory of the people on this wall. My friends. I mean, we share this special bond. We’re the only ones in the world who know what this glee club meant to us. What it felt like to sing together. Go be together. And what it feels like to say goodbye to it. I didn’t come here to cheer you up. Just to thank you. To thank you for going on this ride with me.

Glee: William Schuester to the New Directions - 05x12 100

[gleekquote]

Mercedes: Y'all just trot me out at the end of every number so I can wail on the last note. How is that okay?

Glee: Mercedes Jones - 01x15 The Power of Madonna

[gleekquote]

Will: We were all raised by different parents. But we grew up together in the glee club. It’s a part of all of us.

Glee: William Schuester to the New Directions - 05x12 100

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“Kurt: [while with Sue Sylvester in her office] I met someone online, his name is Walter. Sue: [looking horrified] Oh, Porcelain. No-no-no-no. You will never come out of this alive. This person is obviously a cannibal. I mean, look at you. You’re exceptionally well marbled.’ Sue: [continuing] If I was on a desert island with everybody I knew, I would absolutely eat you first. It doesn’t even have to be a deserted island. There could be any number of casual dining establishments, and I would still opt to eat you. A mouth-watering delicious corn-fed Porcelain rump roast. Kurt: Okay, I’m leaving.”

— Glee: Kurt Hummel and Sue Sylvester - 06x04 The Hurt Locker, Part One (via gleekquote)

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Kurt: Whereas I’m spending my summer composing Pip Pip Hooray, the Broadway musical about Pippa Middleton. Sam: I have no idea who that is but it sounds totally awesome.

Glee: Kurt Hummel and Sam Evans - 02x22 New York

[gleekquote]

Rachel: How do you get that raspiness? Santana: So nice. I smoke cigars.

Glee: Rachel Berry and Santana Lopez - 02x21 Funeral

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Lauren: It’s not like I’m getting married. Quinn: Oh, you can get married as many times as you want, you only get one shot at your junior prom.

Glee: Lauren Zizes and Quinn Fabray - 02x20 Prom Queen

[gleekquote]

Lauren: I look like a lemon meringue pie. Brittany: I think you look delicious.

Glee: Lauren Zizes and Brittany Pierce - 02x20 Prom Queen