Glitter, Paint and Dirt - the blog

A former babysitter, turned Preschool teacher, turned nanny, turned mom. Experiences, thoughts and answers to questions I didn't know existed until the leap to mommyhood...all to compliment the Facebook collection of crafts, ideas, and recipes!

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F*ck YOU 2016 Ok, YES...this seems rather late to the game. In all honesty I wrote this on New Year's eve...I just held it back.

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The Problem with "Real" Human Connection

The Problem with “Real” Human Connection

I started in person networking again at the end of last year. I did it because I so desperately wanted to meet people like me. I didn’t. Like freshman year of high school, the novelty wore off rather quickly when I realized people don’t want a real person. They want the fake one. The Vanna White that smiles and nods at precisely the right moment and delivers exactly what they’ve asked for without…

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The Greatest Lie Ever Told...to Modern Moms

The Greatest Lie Ever Told…to Modern Moms

There is this overwhelming lie sweeping the nation like wild fire. It’s been steadily growing for decades now, but has accelerated in leaps and bounds just in the last generation. You can have it all! Most evil. Lie. Ever. The whole purpose of this lie is to encourage moms to have a full career, and be a full time mom. And be a stay at home wife. And have housecleaners and lawn guys and pool boys…

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I Want *MY* Sexy Back.

   Everyday I am bombarded with images of beautiful women. Photoshopped, inhuman, airbrushed, makeup-ed and unnaturally beautiful women. It’s a problem, we all know it. Yet like a drug we can’t quit it. But those are not the things that drive me insane. Just like Freddy Kruger I know they aren’t real. So I ignore it. Yet, in the same overbearing, in-your-face way I get just as much imagery and…

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My Child is Not a "Brat"...He's Just TWO!

My Child is Not a “Brat”…He’s Just TWO!

Here’s the thing. I know that toddlers can be brats. I know that with the tantrums and the meltdowns and the sleep deprivation most parents will utter “little brat” under their breath 50 times a day while reminding themselves they can’t kill their child. I know it’s not fun or entertaining when a toddler has a complete meltdown in the middle of the restaurant or Target, and I KNOW that’s the…

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Random Mom Thought #63

Random Mom Thought #63

I’m pretty sure the “spy era” is totally over with our generation…because I put no less than 15 images of my son out into the world wide web today alone. Facial recognition will only get better, and with how much of our lives we share online…how in the hell are spies supposed to “blend in and hide”?!

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I'm Not Sure I Was Meant To Be A Mom...

I’m Not Sure I Was Meant To Be A Mom…

It’s 9:10am, my son is eating breakfast, finally. Not “finally” because he won’t eat…but because I couldn’t pull myself out of bed. he’s been up since 7:15. Because of technology, he’s able to watch a show while snuggling with mom (something he loves), while I can sleep longer and know he won’t move. I finally got out of bed solely because he was having a tantrum because my phone suddenly…

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Random Mom Thought #62

That moment when you realize your bedtime is when the​ teething toddler wakes up the first time… Because staying up later and being super tired, is nothing compared to sleeping for an hour then having to wake up again.

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Random Mom Thought #61

That *awesome* moment at 6:30am when you realize that, like the sun, your son keeps waking earlier and earlier…and you pray to God he goes back to sleeping in because  sunrise isn’t until 8 in the winter.  Mainly because you have NEVER been a morning person and have cursed people for thinking anything should start before 9…so waking this early this often makes you an awful human, and crappy mom. 

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My Brother Just Died. We Don't Need Pity. We Need Money.

Here’s the thing. That’s a pretty damn bold statement, and I get that. But right now, I’m angry. I’m emotional. I’m heartbroken. And frankly, right now, in this moment…I don’t care how insulting I sound with my forthright, and rather brash, commentary. My brother died Thursday night. That is less than 41 hours ago. Not even two days. His body was broken, so very VERY broken. Nearly 10 years ago,…

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Random Mom Thought #60

That moment when your 19 month old son asks for daddy to put him to bed for the first time in his life…

And you simultaneously jump for joy with the excitement of your new found freedom…

While crying in the laundry room because your baby told you to go away. 

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Random Mom Thought #59

So for Mother’s Day, I just wanted to be alone. I wanted to have five hours to do whatever I wanted, in my own damn home, with my pajamas on., completely by myself. This mostly would entail catching up on school work, business admin work, or finally cleaning my house – not fun sounding but the stress relief would have been better than a spa day. 

It didn’t happen. 

I was so frustrated and…

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Cardboard Awesomeness!

Check out the featured blog I wrote for Portland Mom's Blog! Cardboard Awesomeness!

Check out the recent blog I did for Portland Mom’s Blog! Stay tuned, I’ll be doing a few followups for DIY toys!!

http://portland.citymomsblog.com/activities/diy-toys-cardboard-awesomeness/

People have truly and sadly forgotten the awesomeness of cardboard. It’s everywhere, comes in unlimited sizes and shapes, stupid cheap or free, and can always be recycled when you are finished. And all…

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Random Mom Thought #58

There’s this moment, as a work at home mom, where you realize you can no longer justify working AT home with a VERY active toddle under your feet. So you take him to daycare and ease into nap time at said daycare. You wait for the dreaded call “He’s melting and just won’t calm down” knowing you’ll have to pack up prematurely…only to get the call “Yup, he’s asleep and I’ll call you when he’s up!”

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5 Reasons Why She Won’t Sleep With You Anymore.

This is a big deal. And a really great read. 

You’re not paying attention. Between our iPhones, our iPads, email at work, what’s going on on our Twitter feeds, or the video that so-and-so posted on Facebook, we just aren’t paying attention to her. …Newsflash- a woman doesn’t desire intimacy with someone who’s not even aware she’s around.

From a Husband

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Galaxy Easter Egg Tutorial

Galaxy Easter Egg Tutorial

OH. EM. GEE.

These are FANTASTIC!!! And permanent! So you can enjoy these little babies EVERY YEAR!!!!!

Galaxy Easter Egg Tutorial.

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Random Mom Thought #57

I never understood why people would move back home to where either of their parents lived after having kids. I always thought it seemed weird. 

Now, 18 months later, I feel more alone, more overwhelmed and more exhausted with a toddler that won’t sleep or eat than I ever did with postpartum. Then I just wanted someone there to tell me I wasn’t a bad mom. Now I would literally kill to have a…

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