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@glocknessmonstor
All I want is a fic where Simon meets Ryland and Rocky and his reaction amounts to jumping up and down and cheering “I WAS RIGHT!!! SUCK IT EDEN!!! I WAS RIGHT!!!!!! You bastards don’t know SHIT!!!!!!!”
please it would be so funny. Simon “no one on Eden likes to think this way but doesn’t it make more sense if a few spaceships disappeared instead of everything else” iron lung is feeling SO vindicated what.
Grace 🤝 Simon <- having an unpopular theory bc you questioned something everyone else blindly believed
I would give an arm and maybe a leg to see the PHM characters in your artstyle (no pressure)
PUT YOUR LIMBS BACK AND HOLD THIS INSTEAD
(links // tip jar!)
Hello!! I built my simon's characterization very heavily off of my own interpretation but also VEERY heavily off of your INCREDIBLY well written, insightful, and verbose studies on his character. I don't think I've found someone who understands this man better than you do.
I do have a question though, if you're willing or able to answer :)! I would love to incorporate a line in my BloodyMary fic about Grace being in disbelief by the proportion of people Simon killed post QR, i know based on your posts that humanity had about 750 or less people left post QR, but also....do we know about how many people Simon technically or estimatedly killed including Filament Station (pinning that on him because it's him talking about it and he feels guilt for that event).
Thank you so much! Again, your account actually makes me froth at the mouth and I love your IL posts with all my heart. I think you are incredible at critical thinking and your media literacy skills are so amazing. Genuinely.
The Ramifications of Filament Station
A Testament to Just How Bad It Was
That is such a high compliment. Oh, man.
If we want to envision the ramifications of what Simon did, we need to do a little bit of math, and then bullshit some stuff.
We know for sure Simon killed at least 62 people (plus however many unstated number of compatriots he had on Filament Station), as stated in the movie. But, Simon's been "The Butcher" for much longer than that. He was a soldier for Eden long enough to end up with a baaad reputation.
We just simply don't have the numbers, but I personally headcanon that he's murdered, in total, about 80 people. He was an effective soldier; one of the best. During his time on Eden, he killed 18 people. This also includes whatever ritual sacrifice he'd participated in throughout his lifetime, or other deaths he simply stood by and let happen. This is then stacked on top of Filament Station's death count.
Simon, in my personal canon, is serving something like 80 lifetime sentences to the COI. In canon, it's ~62. Regardless, he was never going to be free.
If humanity's population was lower than 787 people before Filament Station, Simon's confirmed 62 kills amount to 7.88% of the human race.
To put that in better terms, the 2026 global population is 8.3 billion. If a single person eradicated 7.88% of 8.3 billion people, the exact death toll would be 654 MILLION people.
When I add the 18 prior murders from my own interpretation, Simon single-handedly wiped out 10.17% of the entire human species. If a single person eradicated 10.17% of the population, they would murder roughly 844 MILLION people.
Simon had wiped out the combined total equivalent population of the United States and Indonesia. He's wiped out the entire population of the Caribbean and Latin America. Simon rapidly propelled the human race towards extinction. He's not just a serial killer; the dude genocided humanity.
I don't think Grace would take that information lightly. At all.
GUYS OMG THIS IS NOT A DRILL I DIDNT NOTICE CAUSD I WASN’T REALLY PAYIBG ATTENTION BUT SIMON HAS FANGS
HE HAS LITTLE FANGS LOOK AT THEMMM
AWWWWWWE LOOK AT HIS FANGS I HATE HIM OHHHMYGOD THIS CHANGES (highkey nothing) EVERYTHING 😭😭😭😭🩷😭🩷🩷🩷🩷
There are also fangs in the SM-8 black box data!
I just went through the comments and expected nothing less but repeated hornyposting and people saying that it was cute, and I was not surprised in the slightest to be proven right.
You're all DOGS. EVERY ONE OF YOU. PERVERTS AND DOGS.
Really appreciate that visual reference! I'm yoinking that screencap. Sorry not sorry. Love you. <3
Aerospace Engineer Looks at SM-13 for the First Time
So, I'm friends with someone who makes airplanes for a living. They wish to remain anon. I tossed them some SM-13 renders to see if they could make anything of it (for wiki purposes), and got this in response...
The only thing left they had to say:
I still am a die-hard truther that Simon's favorite color is orange, and I heavily associate him with that color.
I HC that green is something that brings him conflicting feelings. Green is inherently tied to his religion, subconsciously, as it represents the Grove; the only place he could visit throughout his life that naturally held that color. I think green would make him think of Eden, not Earth, and we obviously know that's complicated. Because Eden isn't home to Simon. He renounced them however long ago.
I mean, we know they dressed Simon in green specifically as a callback to his Eden roots (pun intended) in order to serve as a visual marker for the character's past on-screen. I paraphrase Erika Slay's style guide here.
Mars is home. He is the #1 Mars Yearner. He thinks about orange on the horizon to self-soothe. It reminds him of his childhood, of mom, better times, etc. Orange reaches further into that man's soul than green does.
Anyway, I'm saying all this because I got tipsy and started ruminating about how Simon would LOVE carnelian as a gift, and then got sad because he'd be holding it up in porthole windows and imagining a red dot in the distant void... and ugh. Man.
Inspired by @ctrl-shift-alt-9 's headcanon about Simon mining asteroids as a convict I decided to headcanon a design for a four convict mining unit. I'm not the most comfortable in photobash but it really felt like the perfect medium for this one.
Portable mining units
As I envision it this MS's would be a small part of C.O.I's mining operation. Leaving prisoners inside mostly on their own for better or for worse, with not much guard oversight in terms of rationing or behaviour, the shittiness of the circumstance would depend mostly on who you are stuck with. And considering the relative autonomy, being considered for MS work would be the kind of thing you get for good behaviour.
Otherwise you just get to work in the bigger supervised mine or the refineries (which I might also concept out later).
(Also I would consider it funny that the C.O.I owns both an SM and an MS 13 and both had the same unlucky convict inside at some point.)
More headcanons
- The mining stations are all equipped with a radio that is supposed to only serve as communication with nearby tow ships, but there is a way to jail break/jerry rig them into taking external signals. The convicts that can do that are valuable in prison society. The jail broken communicators are mostly used to listine in on passing vessels, or sometimes even far away eden scavenger transmissions or something like it. If a mining operation is all made out of previous eden brothers, that is most likely what they do in their free time.
- a sub headcanon to this is an actual pirate radio station in the iron lung universe, but I think I'll make a separate post for that.
-All the mining suits are numbered, and since Korean culture might have survived in space I think number 4 is still considered unlucky. Simon always gets the number 4 suit
-The crews are usually chosen at random but you can cash in favours to be with the same people twice in a row, I wouldn't say it's common, but there are reoccurring crews that are somehow bonded on these missions (I don't think a cosmic misery universe is complete without a little bit of hope)
Holy WOW. @duskdev LOOK.
the thing about art is that sometimes you'll be moved to tears by stuff that is not very good
Anyway dni if you still support Cain, he hit his brother over the head with a fucking rock and it killed him instantly (source). I truly do not know how he still has fans. It astounds me how people can call themselves good people and still be completely fine platforming blatantly Abelist assholes like him. Smh
since this is being posted i believe a month after the last part im gonna say that yes they've been at this for 4 weeks and grace categorically refused to engage with a weird dream riddle and delegated that in favor studying of his new front yard decoration until frustration finally broke him
we love an avoidant behaviour king
part 1, part 2, part 3, part 3.5, part 4, part 5
+ bonus what i imagine the eridians looked like witnessing the Plot™
random yapping by yours truly below the cut
Among The Hail Mary [Part 7] - Start | Prev | Next
Look guys!! Joy in the Mary!!!
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If you would like notification updates on Among The Hail Mary, you can follow the [ATHM Masterpost] over my Update Blog!
Bonus:
It's okay Grace I don't think Simon cared...
Broke: Grace spending too much time around Simon that he eventually starts swearing properly.
Woke: Simon starts spending too much time around Grace that he starts swearing like him and then gets frustrated. It’s like he’s in the good place where he can’t actually swear now and he gets so frustrated he is like “YOU DID THIS TO ME!”
old wip from when i first started thinking about bloodymary
the idea was that grace and simon start falling asleep next to each other (as a "we're the only 2 humans for a scary amount of distance" thing or to make watching easier) and the cosmic horror-ness following simon makes them start dreamsharing
Still shots from my latest bloodymary post
0/1k on my Kofi is met, consider helping me out since the deadline is next month 💔 my comms are open but I'm also taking donations
Man thats one weird... submarine???
...I think you can tell I gave up on the background
More Vampire!Simon
This could end in 2 ways