Stock Character

English Student/Musician

[nightmare-attendant]

Hey,,look at how important this is

[ego-tistical-prick]

Is he,,, you know,,

[whitepeopletwitter]

[captainvladmir]

….did Bernie just meme himself?

[whitepeopletwitter]

[kinggaydorah]

Same energy

[betterwithpulp]

Respectfully disagree. Atomic breath is coming OUT of Godzilla. Divine Power is clearly flowing INTO that young woman. Possibly for some type of anime transformation.

[kinggaydorah]

You’re so right,,, exothermic reaction vs. endothermic makes different energy

[ghoultongue]

hot take

[atk-iger]

[stephsu]

inspired by this post 

[sarahseeandersen]

[lostsometime]

i had a very illuminating conversation with a guy about 10 years younger than me that really put this change into perspective, which is this:

i have a very distinct memory, in my childhood, of the moment of my disillusionment.  i believed that grown-ups knew what they were doing, and that the things that seemed so obvious to me had to be obvious to them, too (things like DON’T GO TO WAR IN IRAQ, for example).  i believed that, and had that belief pulled out from under me, so my disillusionment comes with a sense of betrayal.

a mere 10 years younger than me, this guy has no such moment or memory.  he never believed grown-ups were fundamentally competent, or good, or reasonable.  he never lived in a world where things didn’t feel constantly careening wildly out of control.  there’s no betrayal in his sense that the government has failed him - of course it has, it was always going to.  he doesn’t remember a time pre-bush, or pre-9/11, or pre-iraq war.  this is just what the world has always looked like for him.  so it’s not really a sense of “disillusionment,” actually - his generation never had any illusions to lose.  they’ve just been in this world so long it’s all they’ve ever known.

[harimenui-forever]

Born around the year 2000 gang

[nbchannibaldaily]

2.13 - 3.07

[regulusblackappreciation]

Sirius, angrily: ARE YOU-

James: Fucking.

Sirius: -KIDDING ME?! YOU-

James: Fucking.

Sirius: IDIOT-

Peter: …what was that?

James: Remus banned Sirius from swearing, so I volunteered to help him out 

[plantanarchy]

still fuckin hate that “bee-free honey” that’s made from……… apples. bitch who you think sexed up those apples

[nihilistwife]

A farmer, by hand and with love and care

[plantanarchy]

wild bees still sexin em up when he’s not looking

[nihilistwife]

old mccuckhold had a farm it seems

[animusrox]

Spider-Man 3 (2007) dir. Sam Raimi

[saintmaro]

Spider-Man 3 (2021) dir. Jon Watts

[blisterswuornos]

[starwarsgraphictee]

Of all the people we should be drug testing it should be the people who have literal stashes of drugs at their work place

[pinof]

the suite life finale

[briefnightmarefire]

[mysharona1987]

[etraytin]

Obviously the health officials did not talk to anyone even loosely affiliated with an actual school. For reasons big or small, terrible or sympathetic, parents send children to school sick all the time.

[tesria]

Schools have spent decades encouraging nonsensical levels of attendance, rewarding kids who don’t take a single day off all term/semester/year, and even punishing kids who take “too much” time off sick. Kids who actually get ill enough to stay home miss out on fun things and “prizes” and awards, because going to school with the flu (or almost anything else) is considered right, good, and necessary.

Then a pandemic comes along that solidly half the population insists is “just the flu” and you think people are going to forget that you indoctrinated them to believe that if they were capable of being conscious (and sometimes not even then) they should be in school? (And later, in work - this is at least part of the point of this stuff, training you to work while sick).

To say nothing of the simple fact that parents are frequently without childcare options and are forced to be in work even if they should be isolating. That’s also a huge problem.

[pencilscratchins]

miles “who’s morales” morales’s biggest weakness is the cover story

[disregardcanon]

peter, lying out of his ass: i was, uh, married to his uncle aaron. he just never let you know

[fallenangelvictorious]

Jefferson, later: Do you think Aaron never told us because Peter’s…

Rio: …Tall

Jefferson: I didn’t think Aaron liked … Tall people.

[teapotsahoy]

Jefferson: “But listen: Aaron might have married a white boy just to annoy me, specifically. It’s a thing he would do!”

Rio: “I can’t hear you. I’m asleep.  I have a shift in four hours.”

[dracophile]

I really wish there was a way Uncle Aaron lived and came back to meet his “husband” at some point now.

Aaron: …Miles…I love you, and I am proud of you…but you are somehow the smartest and dumbest boy I have ever known.

Miles: Says the man who used his big brain to become a criminal when he could’ve been a black Tony Stark with that gear he made. And thought working for the Kingpin, who everyone knows will throw his minions away like tissues, was a good idea!

Peter: He makes a good point, babe, you did kind of mess up first–

Aaron: Call me babe again and see what happens. I’ll whoop you with a collapsed lung.

[christchex]

All I see is “fake marriage au, but it’s also enemies to lovers”

[randomingoftherandomness]

If I ever stop reblogging this post, assume that I have yeeted myself off this mortal coil

[fire-ss]

Why am I shipping it

Why am I shipping it

[brawltogethernow]

I understand the appeal of wanting every adult hero to instinctively adopt teenage Peter Parker, but can it really beat the hilarity of acknowledging that at 15 Peter was 5'10", unusually buff, went by a moniker with Man in it, wore a creepy full face mask, and had a tightly guarded secret identity and probably a Queens accent thick enough to have come out of a jello mold, and adult heroes reasonably responded to him by going, “Wow, this grown man is an immature asshole for no reason.”

[an-android-in-a-tutu]

Way funnier to me than adult heroes finding out Peter is a teenager and becoming Concerned is the idea of adult heroes Retroactively finding out Peter Was a teenager because he admits to being like. 22 and they’re like “Hang on you’ve been doing this for like. Seven years.” and he’s like “Haha crazy right? Anyway it’s too late for you to yell at me about that because the statue of limitations on that lecture ran out when I turned 18”

[brawltogethernow]

YEAH this trope is instantly more tolerable if it’s fully adult Peter being like, *listen up whippersnappers because I’ve been around the block voice* “I’m thirty, and—” and Tony Stark, who vaguely assumed Spider-Man is maybe two years older than him because he just has that energy and hasn’t reassessed this for four presidential terms, is like, *drunkenly doing math* “You’re how many”

[mamapluto]

Okay but…them trying to talk about Old People Stuff with him, not realizing that he wasn’t alive to remember xyz thing happening, never used xyz technology bc he didn’t exist yet, not expecting him to agree with the fact that some ppl were saying songs they grew up to were oldies, etc

[brawltogethernow]

The thing about Peter Parker is that he was raised by senior citizens the way other heroes are raised by wolves. He has the body of an Olympic gymnast and the soul of a malcontented geriatric. This likely contributed to the perpetuation of the accidental ruse.

[brawltogethernow]

It’s when he channels Aunt May so hard he makes it sound like he was personally and immediately affected by McCarthyism that the time traveler fringe theory starts really picking up bets.

[brawltogethernow]

Pal, I JUST SAID he was raised by AUNT MAY.

Also not to get real on a ha ha comic post but the elderly are not your enemy. There are old progressives.

[rubythecrimsonwriter]

Peter has a lot of feelings about the woman that discovered DNA and he strikes me as the kind of person that thinks that distancing yourself from notable figures of history by using their last names is stupid, so he’s going to say something like, “Rosalind worked so fucking hard to have that work snatched from her,” immediately followed by, “I woulda thumped him good,” and inspiring Tony and Banner to frantically look through the 1930s and 40s yearbooks at King’s College and theorize which one was Spider-Man. Captain America tries reminiscing about the good ole days with him. Peter, for his part, has been absently agreeing and making vague “I’m listening” noises about the Rolling Stones and Elton John for the majority of his life, so adding baseball, Duke Ellington, and Ella Fitzgerald to the list wasn’t that much of a stretch.

[brawltogethernow]

There are only like three genuinely funny additions on this, but this is one of them.

[fandomsandstuff]

captain america pushing a get out the vote campaign: ‘spiderman did you vote’

spider’man’ at 16: uhhhh so about that 

[brawltogethernow]

“I…can’t.” “I see. That’s why it’s so important to restore voting rights to felons.”

[vodkassassin]

Kahdkdjdjjsdjsjd just say it like it is. Obviously Spiderman doesn’t have actual citizenship and therefor cannot vote, because he’s not actually human. He’s Spiderman, you know?

[kelssiel]

bruce: you- you think he’s a spider hive mind inhabiting the suit?

tony: WHAT OTHER EXPLANATION IS THERE?!

[shymagnolia]

so I got into grad school today with my shitty 2.8 gpa and the moral of the story is reblog those good luck posts for the love of god

[shymagnolia]

okay so i just got my dream job??? a week after applying to it?? and now i’m thinking….maybe this is the good luck post

[flagellant]

…..not even six hours later i got an offer of a well paying full time long-term job with free room and board in queens in nyc, allowing me independence and a way to escape an abusive situation and an unhealthy environment

likes charge reblogs cast, folks, this is the good luck post

[eroscestlavie]

me rn