JUNE LIKES TO JOKE that she's not afraid of anything. and in a lot of ways -- she isn't. she's not afraid of the more conventional fears: like flying, bungee jumping. spiders -- she's actually always found herself oddly entranced by them. and yet, staring at cerys not just this intently, but for this long ( don't even get her started with the sensation in her bones that washes over her every time she realizes she's touching her -- that's a whole other ball game she hasn't even thought about playing ), this is what she's come to understand as fear. she's never let anyone get this close; there was her roommate, but there's a whole new level to the intimacy, the vulnerability she's experiencing.
opening the gate that had once been locked tight, surrounded by walls that seemed impossible to climb -- at least, june had built them that way. perhaps there was room for one more.
but why is she still fighting it, when the closer they get, the bigger june finds herself smiling? not the usual thin-lipped expression, almost like it pains her to smile. this one's natural. this one's real.
" fine. i could consider that a fair trade. " june hums in satisfaction. what she doesn't admit quite yet -- she tried, she really did. the nightmares she had made the decision for her, however. that she'd paint instead. she'd stopped attempting to make sense of them a long time ago. " you drink water -- i'll try t'sleep. as long as you do too. " even if cerys might think she's asking too much, june's not asking. she's commanding.
the impeding sense of closeness of fingers tangling together is a level of intimacy that june can't remember the last time she'd allowed her to experience. it's different with her, june notices. everything is different with cerys. " yeah? " she hums, giving her hand a gentle squeeze in response, having to inject some of her usual slyness that seems woven into her nature. " i'm glad we have each other... t'roughout all this. " and before that, but there had been a time when june was nothing more than a witness. a friend, but a witness to someone else's happiness.
yeah, she'd seen it coming. cerys and devon. but she'd kept silent. she loved them both that much to let them be happy, even at the expense of herself.
eyebrows pique in interest at the mention of her work. " well -- my studio's a mess. i didn't make my bed neither. but.. " her hand lifts both of theirs from the table, admiring them together. " we could always take our food to go. "
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