Cailey Joshua @godblog2-blog - Tumblr Blog

kinda sick

We live in a generation were sexually exploiting oneself can be considered 'body art' 'sexual expression' 'there choice' 'sexy' and more.. when in reality it's called Sexual brokeness, Immorality, Porn, Prostituion. and sex trade.

We live in a Generation were 'it would be better to die then to be fat,' where girls who have anorexia or bulimia are considered 'attention seekers,' 'yoyo dieters' when in reality its called, Obsession, Addiction, Disease.

We live in a Generation were doing drugs can be considered 'YOLO' ' blowing off steam' 'living it up' and more when in reality its a choice that many might not come back from, a choice people make that can start a road to destruction.

We live in a Generation were there is so much hurt and brokeness that we blind ourselves from the truth and label it as 'Okay' or 'acceptable'

Y-O-U -A-R-E- -V-A-L-U-A-B-L-E!

Gay...? God....? Sin....? Not...?

Some of you know this, but some of you don't. I fell head over heels in love with a girl last year. She was my very bestfriend.. and still is. I ended up being in a relationship with her and this has been my expierence... with Christians, and this is just some of what they said

Why are you in a lesbian relationship...it's not natural.

being gay is an Abomination

It's sin of the flesh.

You're just broken.

Gay people go to hell!

you are confused.

read leviticus

and much more things. I threw my bible and left the church for a few days, started getting high all the time. What people don't seem to understand is how hard of a Journey it has been for me. Finding out you're Bi-sexual when you are Christian! and are not ment to have those feelings is so scary and so hard. I remember though in grade seven there was a girl who walked by me and I wondered what it would be like to grab her and kiss her..(I had never kissed anyone) but I had an odd temptation to.. I of course didn't but idk. Anyways I found out I was legitametly bi-sexual when I was 16. for some reason I felt Convicted from God and Condemend by the church about me dating a girl. I tried to stop believing in God and often try to but try as I might I can't... I always ask myself what I would do if I FOUND out for certain God wasn't real and I always come up with the same answer 'Date Kaela'

so listen though, I have chosen a different life style now. and tears still burn my eyes knowing I can't be with the girl I love! when certain people started guiding me towards understanding I FOUND i was able to trust them. I have many scars on my wrists because of the torture, harrasment and nasty words from Chhristians. I had tried to commit suicide countless of times because people didn't understand me, and that wasn't right

Accept others as christ has accepted you do this in order to bring glory to God.

Christ accepted sinners, but not there sin, he didn't directly say stuff like that I woulkd be going to hell.. rather spoke in love and treated them with respect that they needed. when they did that Sinners were more open to communicating with them..s o please don't knock someone out with that 2'4 sticking out of your eye.... you treat people like dirt.... you are a today world pharisee...

So in conclusion. YES i still have feelings for girls.. YES i am still in love. YES i want to be with them.. but heres the thing... I chose a different life style now because certain people didn;t judge me, my youth pastor Ryan, spoke to me in a caring way about it... I never talk to pastors about my sexuality but felt led too this time. And he listened, and didn't ask why I was in a lesbian relationship or why I had feelings for girls he just lsited. and spoke to me,, that is Romans 15:7 he accepted me and ho i was but spoke out of love about my feelings and what not.. its one less scar on my wrist...one less suicide attempt... one less everything just becaue someone cared.

so think before you bash, xoxoxo <3 oh and I relaize this blog may catch someones attention but please refraine from being rude. thanks so much ;)

christianity, injustice and a trapped lion.

After seeing the amount of injustice there is, hanging out with the disenfranchised and living in a community and intentiolly putting myself in uncomfortable positions, I have come to the conclusion...its the most exciting way to live. Putting yourself out there for people to notice someone CARES. isn't that what Christianity should be about? not Gay bashing, and all that,but don't get me wrong... YOU SHOULDN'T help people because you have to or feel obligated to, but do it because you want to, and show the love of JESUS. coming home after this trip I feel like a trapped lion, knowing that there is so much hurt in the world and so much pain and not knowing were to start or what to do! and something I also realized is being unplugged from media and being so spent I was in tears alot,, was also the best way to live, I had never came so close to Jesus as I did when I needed him, Bible time and quiet time was refreshing, it helped me be okay with things, and figure them out. When I am on the computer ALL the time and not doing anything with my time such as helping people... i dont need jesus... and thats a pretty sick thing for a christian to say There is SO MUCH INJUSTICE, AND CHRISTIANS NEED TO GO UP TO BAT FOR THE DEFFENSLESS, AND CARE AOUT THINGS..!! IT ACTUALLY SAYS THAT MORE IN THE BIBLE THEN 'HOMOSEXUALS GO TO HELL' AND ALL THAT... the reason people want to listen to the Don'ts of the bible is because its scary and exausting listening to the do's of the bible... <3 I love my winnipeg missions team, because these people will LIVE MISSONALY no matter what it takes, <3

Awesome blog. God Bless.

Aweh thank you!, God bless you too! :)

The right to be angry at God?

When you are feeling hurt or angry about something it's easy to take it out on somebody you love and that loves you, because they won't neccesarily hold it against you. too often I find myself doing this with God, when something unfourtanate or scary bad, happens I get angry at God, and i find myself wondering why. God is in control of everything yes but he even tells us that satan is the temporary ruler of the earth. my Bestfriend is dying, and I have to watch her sink into the matress, her soul-less eyes blink at me sometimes with no recolection of who I am. and it sucks, I found out some bad news one night before I went to youth, and for the first time ever I didn't raise my hands when I sang, I grumbled, and shot 'I will NEVER talk to you again God' if you take her from me. It hurts God to see his Children in pain, It hurts him to see you go through what you go through,because Jesus came to earth we have a oppurtunity to have a relationship with him, one when we can turn to him in times of struggle instead of the middle finger up at him, I understand, anger towards God.. I get angry at God alot.. but the fact of the matter is.. it's not his fault.. he has a GREATER plan then something I could EVER begin to come up with. God is incredible and powerful, no words can ever describe his plan but only one Word can describe his love for us. Jesus. and the only reason that one word can explaine Love to us is because HE LOVES US SO MUCH HE GAVE US LOVE! Stripped, broken, bloody and bruised, so the next time you get angry at God think of this 'Greater plans has he the one who sent me his Son' just stay strong!!<3 he loves you<3

#Jesus #worship #Lord Of Lords #God #angry #strength #Hope #faith

jjanoskians

calvinklein

godblog2-blog

haha daang

No matter how many pettles come off 'He loves me not' God places another petal,

a rose in the distance,

it's the middle of a holocost, and you see a rose bright and non wilting in the distance, You crawl despertley to that last bit of beauty in the midst of a storm, when all of a sudden you reach out and touch it it dissapears but you look around and all you see in the midst of everything is beauty. you can see the evil with in people but you can also see the good.. That rose was the spirit of God. When you believe in God you learn to see how he sees, you learn to love how he loves. there is EVIL in this world and Christians are to afraid to go there I mean we represent someone who created everything, we worship someone who we can't physically see, but when you are a true christian you begin to notice that evil is here because no one is truly trying to stop it. we need to intercede in the spirit and go to the throne of God in confidence,

Here are some reasons that people don't want to go against Evil it's dangerous it's messy it's scary you could die you could get hurt you may 'lose' but here is the thing, You can't lose against evil anymore then you are now, SO WHY FEAR. here are BIBLE VERSES that rebuke those fears

fear 1-it's dangerous ( Deuteronomy 28:1-68 )

“And if you faithfully obey the voice of the Lord your God, being careful to do all his commandments that I command you today, the Lord your God will set you high above all the nations of the earth. And all these blessings shall come upon you and overtake you, if you obey the voice of the Lord your God. Blessed shall you be in the city, and blessed shall you be in the field. Blessed shall be the fruit of your womb and the fruit of your ground and the fruit of your cattle, the increase of your herds and the young of your flock. Blessed shall be your basket and your kneading bowl. ... Fear 2-It's messy(Psalm 144:1)

Of David. Blessed be the Lord, my rock, who trains my hands for war, and my fingers for battle; Fear 3- it's scary (Psalm 23:4)

Even though I walk through the valley of the shadow of death, I will fear no evil, for you are with me; your rod and your staff, they comfort me. Fear 4 and 5-You could die//get hurt (John 14:1-2)

"Do not let your hearts be troubled. Trust in God; trust also in me. In my Father's house are many rooms; if it were not so, I would have told you. I am going there to prepare a place for you. Fear 6-You may fail -(Hebrews 4:14-16) Therefore, since we have a great high priest who has gone through the heavens, Jesus the Son of God, let us hold firmly to the faith we profess. For we do not have a high priest who is unable to sympathize with our weaknesses, but we have one who has been tempted in every way, just as we are - yet was without sin. Let us then approach the throne of grace with confidence, so that we may receive mercy and find grace to help us in our time of need. and Psalm 73:26 My flesh and my heart may fail, but God is the strength of my heart and my portion forever. Follow the bible, don't be a fraidy cat , because you may be scared now but as you fight evil SATAN TREMBLES AT THE SOUND OF YOUR NAME, TAKE IT BACK <3

#Jesus #Morethenenough #Evil #Strength #hope #faith #God

Worship is more then...

Worship is more then going to church on a sunday and singing songs to God. any athiest can go to church and catch a beat but it takes a Christian to live out the words that are in the songs, that are in his word. are you?

Let me start off with telling you a bit of a testimony. I was 16 and 17 years old and I went to youth every friday and sunday, I worshipped God in the songs I sang but Had weed tucked into my note book for later, I left communin to smoke a ciggaret, came back drank the cup and ate the cracker I would go high or drunk, and thought it was okay. I antsed around and tapped my feet waiting for church to be over so I could go get completley stoned out of my mind...

One particular day, I had relapsed and snorted percocets and oxycontin in the back of a van for 5 hours! taking a bit of a rest in between mins but needless to say I overdosed.. I walked to church with a friend that was also high on it and we ignored our pastor because our eyes were completley black, and we know he would catch us.. (i think we wanted to be) but anyways... he talked with me that day and I begged him not to call my mom or anything and things were NUTS.... but I went to church high because I never wanted to miss 'worship' THAT IS NOT WORSHIP GOD GOES WITH YOU HOME THAT SUNDAY, HE GOES WITH YOU WHEN YOU DRIVE TO THE BAR AND GET BLITZED, HE'S THERE WHEN YOU LOSE YOUR TEMPER, HE'S THERE ON A SUNDAY WHEN YOUR WORSHIPPING AND SAYING YOUR GOING TO GET YOUR LIFE BACK ON TRACK......

Worship my friends...is not about performance rather about Importance,.. and you know who's important to God? PEOPLE. When you treat a person the way you would treat God it's an act of true worship, When you talk to the kid with no friends, its an act of worship, when you walk out in faith and pray for people it's worship, when you sing praise its worship, BUT IT'S NOT ENOUGH, when you give to the homeless person, it's an act of worship, Worship isn't in a building of Believers ..worship is in the BODY of believers The spirit lives with in us. there for gives us all we need. WE NEED TO TAKE BACK WHAT THE ENEMY HAS STOLEN, From our YOUTH, from our YOUNG ADULTS, from our Pastors, from our children, because of the worship that you should live by, WE HAVE THAT CHANCE. God is bigger then a voice but he wants to Use your voice in a shocking amount of ways... it's NOT Okay to let worship be a building.. Be the body... suppport one another and love one another, now that is worship<3

God bless ;) Father, bless these people today who ever has read this. God guide them in true acts of worship lord, God you are greater in Jesus name Amen,

#Jesus #Worship #Truth #BODYOFBELIEVERS

I loved you, You stole my heart, I wanted to steal your last name </3

WHAT MAKES YOU FEEL BETTER WHEN YOU ARE IN A BAD MOOD?

When I talk to a friend who actually takes the time to listen to me:P

A life lived in fear is a Life half lived.

Perspective.

It's a bird!, It's a Plane! ITS PERSPECTIVE ;)

In the past 2 weeks I have been learning about perspective.. catching myself viewing things, or people in a bad way, through broken lenses. 2 weeks ago on friday I sat in my Pastors office fed up, in tears, stressed and furious with something God was doing in my life. 'my first thing I said was 'hahah please don't kick me off the missions trip' and 'You hate me and your out to get me' Looking back I can see how ridiculous it was, but thats honestly how I felt. because of my assumptions and perspective on things.

When we look at things through 'broken lenses' we begin to lose the reality of what things are or who people are. I had a very injured perpsective about men... Cowering away and thinking ALL of them are abusive rapists who thrive off beating girls up. and no men were different... even though I often percieve men as you mess up you get beat still my perspective of them has changed drastically... the way we see things isn't often how they are There is two sides to every coin, if you don't like something...flip it around ;) you can't change the out come of the situation but you can change the way you see it, situations suck, but if you decide to look at it as an oppurtunity to Grow, In the bible Jonah had a bad perspective of who God was and the city of ninevah, he was actualluy ANGRY with God when he didn't smite the city all to death because they believed and worshipped him turning away from there evil ways. Moses had a injured perspective of God at first but finally grew to see who he was. they talked as old friends would. Change your perspective on things, let God heal your heart and put on new lenses ;)

westcoastryan

godblog2-blog

hahaha have you ever grown something in the garden of your mind?

teheh sooo awesome

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Cailey Joshua