Goddammit Charles

@goddammit-charles

The Modblog of Ask Charles Farrow. Sup my dudes. I like ponies, expressions, psychology and most things that aren't pineapples. To be truthful they're the only thing in this world that I hate. Welcome to the blog.

70 posts

ATTENTION TUMBLR ARTISTS

SICK AND TIRED OF PEOPLE STEALING YOUR GODAMN ART?

Can’t find the godamn ask to tell the blogger to kindly take your art down?

NO MOAR!

Email [email protected] with links to your originals and the repost, and they’ll take it down.

NOW REBLOG THE SHIT OUTA THIS AND SPREAD THE WORD!

Japanese translation ・日本語訳

Tumblrの絵師さんにお知らせ

絵の無断転載されまくりでうんざりしている貴方！

絵を外してもらいたいのに犯人のAskが見つからない？

もう大丈夫です！

貴方の元々の投稿のURLと転載されたURLをメールに入れて[email protected]に送れば、Tumblrのスタッフが削除してくれます。（※訳注：できれば英語を使った方は多分対応が早くなる）

さあ、これをリブログしてみんなに知らせよう！

Korean translation

계속되는 Tumblr 그림불펌에 지치신 존잘님들! 내려달라고 하고 싶지만 불펌한 당사자에게 직접적인 연락이되지않아서 골치아프신가요?

»> [email protected] «< 이쪽으로 원본 소스 링크와 허락없이 올려진 링크를 이멜로 보내시면 Tumblr가 알아서 내려줍니다.

그리고 영어가 불편하신분들을 위해서 간단하게 작성을 했습니다: “My art was uploaded without permission on Tumblr, and I would like the post removed. This is the original link to my art (소스링크) . This is the post I would like deleted (불펌링크) .”

YOU CAN ALSO SEARCH FOR THEIR URL IN THE SEARCH BOX, CLICK ON THE PERSON’S ICON ON THEIR URL BOX THINGY, AND GO TO “FLAG THIS BLOG.”

HERE’S A QUICK STEP-BY-STEP FOR YOU. YOU CAN ONLY DO THIS IF IT IS YOUR WORK!

Its thief huntin season yall

My art aren’t good enough yet to get stolen, but this’ll help other artists who periodically get their work stolen.

Let’s spread the words y'all.

ALWAYS REBLOG. PLEASE REBLOG.

goddammit-charles

Valid

She was my favorite B')

Bro she has 6 fingers

goddammit-charles

Not anymore she doesn’t

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A story where all the side characters end up being more harmful to the protagonist than the antagonist.

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Rules for the road when traveling in northern Europe

Memorize your route. Your map can and will lie.

Take the safest roads.

Mountain passes shift between our world and another - do not leave your car when you are crossing a mountain pass.

If you see something you believe to be a bear, do not photograph it.

The snow does strange things to our eyes.

Borders shift.

Do not speak to anyone you meet further than a kilometer from the nearest building.

Not everything that appears to be human is.

You may eat at rest stops but leave as soon as possible. If there are no other guests there, leave immediately.

Don’t listen to birdsongs for too long - they will start to tell you things you’d rather not hear.

There are no shortcuts.

Something is looking at you, but it is indifferent to your existence.

The things beneath the soil would rather stay undisturbed. Don’t dig.

Bring a mirror and a clear head.

Leave all religious items at home. They will make a scent trail.

There is a reason we fear wolves, but it isn’t the one you think.

Do not touch scissors on the ground. Ever.

The wind will bite you. Cover up.

The longer you spend in the woods, the stranger the air gets.

Stay calm.

Never approach old houses.

If there is mist on the ground, do not be afraid.

Windmills are further away than they seem.

Don’t look into lakes.

Some farms don’t always exist. Don’t worry if you can’t find it on your return trip.

Don’t drink slow-running river water. If you do, there will invariably be a dead animal upstream.

Bridges are sacred places. Do not disrespect them.

Avoid wetlands.

There are no children out here, only false ones.

If you suddenly get lost, stay very still.

At first I didnt realize whom posted this and just thought this was all real advice

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I thought this was real advice and the whole time was thinking this would be amazing for a story

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This is real advice! If you ever find yourself in northern Europe, you will be glad you reblogged or saved this post!

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Rules to follow when at sea

The ship should be treated with kindness.

Not all waters are good.

Don’t look deeper than you absolutely have to.

A sudden shallow means something is beneath you.

Never sail alone at night.

There are things best left unseen.

Whales are wise. Do not anger them.

You are very, very small.

There may be eyes in the fog. Don’t make contact.

Some ships sail under no flag. They are not real. Not anymore.

Occasionally, you will get a distress transmission from the Atlantic. Don’t answer it.

The sound of motors in the fog is never, ever, a good sign.

Some lighthouses move. Don’t depend on them.

Make as little sound as possible whenever your chest feels strange.

It is entirely possible to lose time at sea. Do not worry. You will remember eventually.

If the water goes murky, leave the top deck.

There may be blood in the water. Don’t look.

If you startle at nothing, it was not nothing.

There are some kinds of fog your lights won’t shine through. When you encounter it, take a different route.

Some fjords are not for human travel.

The singing is most likely not sirens. Pray that is is not.

Never dive and expect nothing strange to happen.

If something feels off, check your ropes.

If someone shouts to you in the dark, do not reply.

Sometimes curious things knock on the hull. They will usually leave.

Nothing is ever entirely as it seems.

Moonlight on the ocean has a hypnotic effect. Don’t stare.

There will always be something watching from the coast.

When the sky turns strange colours, close your eyes. It is best not to see.

If your compass does not work, let yourself drift on the current. Something wants you gone.

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You are the wind’s interpreter. What’s it saying?

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Aliens flying near the solar system caught an internet burst and were curious. They’ve now come to the shelter you work at to adopt all the cute dogs they saw.

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One day, you walk out into your back yard, to find a dragon sitting there. About the size of a small horse, and dressed in what looks like some kind of harness, with pouches and pockets hanging off of it. You’re pretty sure you can see a knife poking out of one. Upon noticing you, the dragon talks.

“Finally, thought you’d never wake up.”

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You have just found out that your seemingly loving parents have been trying to kill you for years. Write about the more ridiculous times you’ve narrowly, and unknowingly, escaped their attempts.

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You’re a student in college, just trying to pass your finals, but your two roommates, a werewolf and a vampire, keep distracting you.

Surviving a Desert

Only move at dusk and dawn.

Cover yourself. The sun is an old and angry thing.

Try not to leave tracks.

Not all that is visible is real.

Not all that is real is visible.

When you start hearing the voices of the dead, settle down and do not move. They will pass you by.

Do not approach caravans.

Dreams had in the desert are either prophetic or real. Decide wisely which to believe.

There are no wolves here. You will hear them anyway.

Never rest in the bottom of a dune valley.

Do not speak to anything that has not proven itself to be human.

When the sand shakes, run.

Cover your mouth. The sand will coat your lungs.

Seeing things in the day is not a problem. Seeing things at night should be.

Never play the flute.

Always carry a sack of sugar for hungry things.

You are meat. Do not forget this fact.

If there is something in your periphery, do not look at it. It wants you to.

Dig yourself into the ground in a sandstorm. The wind will take you away.

The flames are not real.

The shadows are not real.

Never close your tent flap all the way. It is impolite.

Never let your lantern go out.

The ancient have no love for the young.

Do not drink water offered to you.

Do not watch the dancers. They will trick you.

There should be no clouds. If there are, move until they disappear.

Travel alone. You will invariably lose your companions.

Someone will cry out for help. Do not follow the voice.

The murmurs of veiled ones are to be disregarded.

More guides

How to Befriend the Monster Under Your Bed

Rules For Ghost Hunting and Such For People Who Do Not Normally See Them

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So… You wanna explore the Universe.

If you are reading this guide, then you and any potential peers want to leave the comfort and security of your warm mother star and expand into the cold, dark, and unforgivable void. A mistake, really, but I am not here to stop you; I am here to lay out some basic rules that you puny mortals must abide by.

Don’t ask questions you are not prepared to know the answer to.

There’s always bigger.

Never cross the Elder Gods.

Always remember rule 1.

Fusion based energy is your best friend. If you are still using fossil fuels then your species sucks. Period.

Speaking of fossil fuels, chemical based rockets suck. Try using space bending warp drives or quantum bridges. Light speed sucks, too.

It’s not a bad idea for your species to be genocidal xenophobic maniacs to everything but yourselves. Just make sure you have the firepower to back it up.

I highly recommend total unity within your species. If you are too busy fighting amongst yourselves, what are you going to do when Needledorp arrives?

Fear Needledorp.

Always remember rule 9.

If you find a desolate, rocky planet with the only inhabitant named “Frank”, avoid that planet at all costs. I don’t care if it’s rich in resources, just avoid it.

Some black holes are alive. They are aggressive. Do not pet the black holes.

It’s just like that, sometimes.

Make sure nothing is following you.

If you have an individual with psychic powers, expect them to go insane once they leave the confines of your mother star. Lock them up in a closet with a few markers and check up on them every once in a while. If they star my screaming about an entity named “Carol”, shoot them out the airlock. They will be the distraction.

Remember rule 1.

You are immortal until proven otherwise.

Any extraterrestrial rocks may have anomalous properties. Proceed with caution, or you may get space zombies or something.

Remember rule 13.

Make sure nothing is following you.

Violence may be an answer to a dispute with an extraterrestrial entity. Copulation is a last resort (control your thirst).

If bullets don’t work, punches will.

Remember rule 17.

Your objective: survive.

Babies are not food, they are weapons.

There are cheat codes.

Don’t ask about the cheat codes. Remember rule 1.

If the void is staring at you. Make it uncomfortable.

Avoid Frank. The anomalous one.

Remember rules 1, 2, and 3.

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idk man I like this one

toidiragluuv-blog

I really like this one

How to Befriend the Monster Under Your Bed

Befriending the monster under your bed has always been a risky affair. You either do it right or you die. Follow the tips below to increase your chances of friendship.

Read bedtime stories to your monster.

Offer food once in a while.

In some cases your monster might be aggressive; show dominance. I suggest you pick up ’How to Cook the Monster under Your Bed’ by notorious monster serial killer Dave Harley, and put it on your nightstand. Visit the HGK477 library and ask Bob. He knows where to find it.

Do not look directly into its eyes. Ask for permission first.

If you notice that your closet door is opened, move out of the room, you won’t be able to handle two of them.

Talk to the monster.

Some monsters only read dreams and don’t understand the human language. Increase the chance of you having a monster friendly dream by visualizing yourself doing something nice with the monster until you fall asleep.

Leave an arm, any arm, dangling from your bed.

If pitch black shadows darker than dark creep up on the walls, leave immediately. It’s not your room anymore.

Clean underneath your bed for them.

If your bed starts to shake violently, stop. Try again tomorrow.

More guides

Rules For Ghost Hunting and Such For People Who Do Not Normally See Them

Surviving a Desert

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You have lived your entire life in the concrete walls of a cult. You have always been told that outside those walls is nothing but pain and suffering, and that inside is a safe haven. You aren’t so sure about that at all, and you manage to escape…they were telling the truth.

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your favourite character, from an alternative universe knock your door at midnight. You are their favourite character from their favorite book and they want to know what happens next.

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You are a high school student with nothing much really happening in your life right now. One day, you find a strange necklace. When you put it on, a humanoid figure with black horns and red eyes wearing punk rock style clothing appears in a flash of fire and a cloud of smoke before you, introducing themselves as your personal demon.

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The chosen one is a middle school teacher who teaches kids destined to villany how to twist their respective prophecies and become good members of society.

Goddammit Charles @goddammit-charles - Tumblr Blog | Tumgag