GogoUtori Art

Art blog || tori or gogo ||old af|| coffee vampire|| intp || chronic migraines || next con →??  Please Do Not repost my art

[sleepimali]

Sad worm wip 🥹

[gogoutoriart]

lowkey considering nuking this page(s) idk yet

[gogoutoriart]

Yeah I think I might just finish out my obligations and then probably archive or nuke my art pages idk. Between being sick so often and lack of practice it’s just gotten more and more embarrassing to try and post anything. 🙈 I think I’ll always create, even if there’s no audience or anything to share it with. Some people need to write, some people need to make music, I think I will always have a ‘need’ to draw, even if it’s going to generally stay amateur in a sketchbook just for me. Years ago sharing my art was such a novel thing that truly connected me with people and gave me a huge confidence boost, but now I really don’t feel like it serves any purpose at all. It also really feels like a waste to get rid of all the show things I’ve accumulated over the years, but I don’t think a rebrand can really change things at the core.

Lol this name was also always really hard to say anyways. My dad came up with it and I kept it but it never really flowed for anyone 😅

[gogoutoriart]

lowkey considering nuking this page(s) idk yet

[spffnity]

i think xl needs more smooches

[ whats mothualian? ]

[faithschaffer]

[gogoutoriart]

like I just actually need to become obsessed and learn to draw noses or hot men idfk know man... wtf is life y'know?

[gogoutoriart]

I feel really distant from my art lately... At first I thought this time off work would be filled with drawing non-stop! But in the end, I've barely picked up a pencil, paint brush, or tablet. Whether its from being tired/sick or busy with appointments or, honestly, just not wanting to, I've neglected drawing for a while.

Sometimes I wish I had the same hyperfixation some people get where they want to draw a character or pairing nonstop. It would at least get me to actually pick up my sketchbook.

Even my own 'string bean chibi" style looks wrong to me. Its not flowing naturally or looking right at all. I understand that sometimes when this happens it like that graph of your skill vs your understanding of art and how that isn't always in sync. I think my art as a whole needs to go through a big shift in skill and style... but its also these moments where I'm so fucking tired and dissatisfied with it that I just want to give up art completely. Like, what is my goal even with my art anymore? I liked sharing it at artist allies a decade ago, but that scene has changed drastically and I can't keep up with what the cons now accept. My skill is definitely stayed more amateur. It needs to grow, but then what? I still don't think I'll be able to hold a candle to what it takes to get into most cons these days. And with my health where it is now, idk how well I'd be able to run one on my own.

So maybe I just stop and draw for hobby again? It's a vicious cycle of not drawing because you are disappointed and then not improving because you're too upset to draw. Maybe the monetization of my art was a bad idea in the first place. idk at this point. I know I just need to force myself to draw anything at this point. It could be many life things contributing to my weariness with it, but trying to at least draw a little something might help? I'm not sure... Its like not just art block of not knowing what to draw but an entire block of even wanting to draw or create in general.

My art at the moment doesn't feel like it does anything or contributes anything worth while to a fandom or society as a whole. I used to say " I make art to make people happy" but I feel l haven't done that in some time. Maybe I need an ego death or to kill perfectionism. I'm just really not sure anymore..

[gogoutoriart]

🫐🍓Check out my booth at KaelucCon this weekend over on Pictsquare!

There are so many talented artists contributing and fun/adorable events taking place!! If you're a fan of Kaeluc, its a great chance to grab some awesome goodies~

[gogoutoriart]

The 2024 Winter Miku design lives rent free in my head~ Its so cozy and the color palette is lovely! I've wanted to draw her for a while and I might have had her finished her before the New Year, but chronic pain got my ass ;w; lol I'm actually pretty happy with how it turned out and it was fun to draw, which is going to be a big shift with my art for 2025.

What are some vocaloid songs that make you think of winter time?? Mine are Strobo Nights - livetune, and Dream Eating Circus - michiru. I need to find some more ^^;;

[gogoutoriart]

uwaaawaaa!! I got into a con I really was hoping to do as a vendor! ;w; After being dead for like... half a week, this was so exciting to open my email to!~

Whats something nice that has happened to you recently?

[gogoutoriart]

It's my 9 year anniversary on Tumblr 🥳

oh? really?? I've had my art as a business for 9 years then! 😱

[gogoutoriart]

This was supposed to be a XL birthday doodle but I ended up really not liking it so I never posted it outside of my stories 😅

I feel like this is what my bd cake looked like this year lol

[gogoutoriart]

A little Hualian gardening doodle~ I'm trying to get better at adding backgrounds to my art ;w; I really love the scene in the book where XL and SL are helping in puqi village rice fields~

I'd like to do a lot more danmei doodles

[gogoutoriart]

Some spring Forest Hipster doodles from over the weekend ☀️🌱💐

A doe, a bunny, a beaver, and a badger.

🦌🐇🦫🦡✨

[obsolescencia]

[gogoutoriart]

MXTX IS BACK!?!???!!!

[gogoutoriart]

Well this turned out MUCH longer than I had originally planned ^^;;

I actually started this comic back in late November if I remember correctly, but I've been taking twice as long to finish it because... migraines~ 🥲

This isn't a comic for pity or sympathy, but part of me coming to terms with my new 'normal', processing that, and explaining why I haven't been able to do as much (online and irl) as I used to. I've been dealing with this for about 8ish years, but the last 4 have been really rough. To be completely honest, most of my 2023 was actually spent in bed. That really bummed me out.

Moving forward, I wanted to be clear that I'm not really able to work at 100% rn. I still want to open an online store, do artist alleys, take on commissions, make selfish art, cosplay.... but I also have to acknowledge my health and give myself some grace too. (I'm not very good at that ^^;;) Hopefully this explains a bit more about my situation and what migraines are, but if you want more info I highly suggest you check out the first few hits on google (lol its free!). Cleveland and Mayo clinic, NINDS, etc, are all great resources to learn more. Heck even I had to look stuff up to learn more about what was going on.

All that being said, when I finally do end up figuring out how to draw laying down, it really is over for you hoes. I will being drawing SO MUCH I will be unstoppable~

Until then, please bear with my slower pace~

<3 ~Tori

[gogoutoriart]

AM bump!~