I finally unfriended you.
It was a weight lifted over my shoulders and you’re finally a distant memory
So distant that you’re the ocean, the endless pity of uncertainty
And I’m the mountain who stands tall, to which we will never meet again
Like the ocean will not meet the mountain.
They would be a short high, like we were
When the explorer finds the mountain and ocean meeting, they are excited, in awe
That was us, we were excited, and in awe of what we found in each other. A feeling so pure and happy
Until the explorer finds something better and forgets the ocean meeting the mountain, by taking a picture to remember it but to ultimately check it of their list
Like you did with me. I gave you me, you checked me off your list, and now I’m that picture. Taken to try and capture its beauty but it never will because all you will remember is that physical and not the feeling that the mountain brought you, what I brought you.
But like that, we move on regardless of the beauty that could have been us
you’re the ocean, forever changing with your different waves of emotion but staying the same because water can never be conquered like land, like you conquered me
Where I the mountain, cannot move as I stand my ground, planted where I was supposed to. Without you now because you discovered me but left to find something better.
Without the salty air, the sand between my toes and the stinging sensation of you sweeping into the open wounds I still have from you beating me down with your waves of anger and jealousy. A feeling that I couldn’t enough of at that point. It was fascinating to see how long I would allow my wounds to not heal and allow you sting and work your way to keep me coming back to the sensation, the pain, the hurt.
You’re the ocean, I’m the mountain.
You don’t look like him. Physically you’re nothing alike
How blind could I have been? Not seeing him on the surface made be believe that you were a good man. Good enough for my mind and my body
How couldn’t I see that inside, you were just like him
Demeaning, mean, selfish yet kind and intelligent
And I loved you, both of you
He raised me, and you raised me to be a better person.
I reflect that of both your behavior. It was almost his evil endeavors captured you and turned you into him. Someone who could lie about love, a person who could lie about wanting me and a person who could abandon me just like that
Both afraid of your feelings for me. Both so undeniably desperate for attention that when given it, you must find it in someone else after you planted in me.
Roots so deep I see you every day. Constantly finding things that would make you laugh, and I’d think about your laugh. How you smelled of strawberry gum because that’s the only one you would chew. Your straight smile and your wrinkled eyes at the crease as you wheeze and bring your knees up to your body. Your rough hands would then grasp mind and give them a squeeze of approval of that joke being funny. your approval meant everything. everything.
Your eyes. How could I forget your blue eyes? They way it would know when I’m sad, they way they would look into my brown eyes to ease me of my pain that you knowingly gave me and me unknowingly accepting it.
But I unfriended you. I stopped checking to see if you saw my story. I deleted our conversations. I deleted the pictures.
izzy806
turnnoffyourmind
vaporwave
gummygunk
snowghoul
stormborns
