“I figured you must be blackmailing that poor girl to have lunch with you.”
“I think it’s fair to say that I’m pretty sexy.”
“I don’t want to live in a world where I have to eat sugar free sugar cookies.”
“I remembered today was your birthday so I thought I’d say hi.”
“You have nothing to lose except your lonely loser status.”
“I sure am tired from all that relaxing I did today.”
“Then I can spend my entire allowance on comic books and video games and no one can stop me.”
“When you listen to pop music, you often hear them saying ‘shawty.’”
“[NAME] made fun of me because I say ‘poot’ all the time.”
“I waited and waited because I really wanted to see you.”
“Tell papa/mama what’s up.”
“It hurts my face just looking at you.”
“I look forward to seeing what you’re gonna do with my butt.”
“A trash bin..? Is this a clue to your true identity?”
“I’m beautiful, but I’m also deadly.”
“What did you do to my body?”
“Stick to chocolate and comic books. You’re too young for love anyway.”
“I’m sorry.. please don’t be too mad at me.”
“I have a big favor to ask you.”
“Maybe I’ll just go home and lock myself in a closet.”
“I gotta admit, I really love that one show where all those people do the stuff and then something happens.”
“Here, touch my skin. It’s totally slimy right now.”
“I probably look in the mirror 24 times a day just to be sure I’m still so darned handsome/beautiful.”
“Guess what I’ve got in my pockets right now.”
“Better not catch you making goo-goo eyes at my wife/husband.”
“No one understands me. I’m hungry all the time and no one cares.”
“Are you suggesting my style is outdated?”
“Don’t play with stink bugs, especially when you’ve got a date coming up.”
“They don’t even care who wins. They just all flex their pecs.”
“Love means accepting that there will be times when you don’t get the last scallop.”
“Yeah exercise is totally hard and stuff. I think I’m gonna go take a nap and read a book or whatever.”
“Today was the day my best friend in the whole wide world was born.”
“Whoa you look so weird. And not weird in a hip way. More like 'weird’ as in 'makes me want to barf.’”
“Not to sound corny but I really like you.”
“I wonder how I can say 'swaggy ’ in the most grown up way possible.”
“Just because two people are good friends doesn’t mean they’d make a good couple.”
“Sorry, I was staring at your face because I don’t know you. Not because there’s something wrong with your face.”
“Would it surprise you if I said I’m pretty proud of my legs?”
“The truth is never free.. but sometimes it’s on sale.”
“I hear the sound of rap coming from somewhere.”
“They tell you to sleep on a problem. But what if your problem is insomnia?”
“I’ll just observe your friends from the shadows.”
“I heard allergies are caused by the government.”
“Watch out, 'cause I’ll compliment you until you puke.”
“So D.I.Y. stands for 'do it yourself’? Well, if these guys think I’m going to do my own manual labor, they’ve got another acronym coming.”
“I can smell your confidence. Smells like soup.”
“Please don’t call on me.”
“I think I dropped my house key somewhere. That was my favorite key… it opened my house.”
“Do you want to hear the brutal truth? That outfit is a hot mess.”
“Oh, I get it! You’re playing it cool. Trying your best not to cry.”
gummygunk
dededos
annaxmalina
pixelskylines
titsay
