hiii! im marz/goldfish/silliness/matthew, and this is my blog where i post stuff about my interests!! which, at the moment, is mainly:
✰ danganronpa
✰ total drama
more about me:
i originally had bullet points for this but i don't want to do that again so you're getting a paragraph this time!!
so, i have a LOT of interests, you'll see my list of fandoms in a second, but other then those i like reading, making bracelets, researching things, drawing, writing, roller skating, and theater!!
i have a broad taste in music, but mitski, will wood, RIProducer, dazey and the scouts, olivia rodrigo, tv girl, alex g, and MARINA are some of my favorite artists. i love tone tags i appreciate them so much please use them when you talk to me. i mainly use he/xe/star but i LOVE almost every neopronoun feel free to experiment. i'm also autistic and the host of a system, but i doubt anyone else will be posting on this blog besides me. because of this, i'll be using i/me/myself (will wood reference) most of the time.
i'm a yumeshipper, trans masc, queer, an age regressor (sfw), and multishipper. i'm strictly anti-harrasment, but i don't identify with the definition of proship more commonly used nowadays (people who ship illegal things).
stamp credits
stamp credits part two
blinkie credits
blinkie credits part two
blinkie credits part 3
can you tell i really like blinkies
more blinkies
FANDOMS
— Total Drama
— Danganronpa
— Invader Zim
— MHA
— Cookie Run Kingdom
— Don't Hug Me I'm Scared
— RC9GN
— My Little Pony (Gen 4)
— Dandy's World
— ATLA
— Tetro Pink/Blue (I DO NOT SUPPORT VON)
— Death Note
— WALL-E
— Doki Doki Literature Club
— Heathers
— Inside Out
— Ouran High School Host Club
— TSAMS
— The Owl House
— SpongeBob
— Bojack Horseman
— FNAF
— Hetalia
— The Lego Movie
— TADC
— Baldi's Basics
— The Drowsy Chaperone
— Moral Orel
— They Both Die at the End
— TAWOG
and many more!!
PLEASE INTERACT IF YOU'RE IN MY FANDOMS!!
basic dni (racists, homophobes, ableists, etc,) but i have a few specific people i don't want interacting as well:
✰ endo systems/pro endo accounts
✰ people who hate furries, alterhumans, kins, therians, etc
✰ anti-recovery people who encourage others to also not recover
✰ pro-contact paras
✰ radqueers
✰ proship accounts
✰ trump supporters/maga
thin ice (what does this mean?):
✰ people who say "you're not real"/"im not real"/"nothing is real"/"your life isn't real" as a joke
✰ anti recovery, but doesn't promote it/recommend it to others
✰ people who tell other people to kill themselves/hurt themselves as a joke
I WILL BLOCK YOU IF YOU CROSS MY BOUNDARIES, PLEASE DO THE SAME IF I UNKNOWINGLY CROSS YOURS
LISTEN UP AGAIN KIDS
STOP REBLOGGING THIS FUCKING GARBAGE POST. IT IS 100% FUCKING BULLSHIT AND CAN AND MOST DEFINITELY WILL LITERALLY KILL.
DO YOU NOT SEE WARNING LABELS THAT SAY “DO NOT INDUCE VOMITING”? THEY AREN’T FUCKING AROUND. YOU CAN FUCKING BURN THEIR ESOPHAGUS BY CAUSING VOMITING, CAUSE CHOKING, DROWNING, OR MAKE IT WORSE!
AGAIN DO NOT FORCE ANYTHING DOWN ANYONE’S THROAT. THEY. CAN. DROWN.
IF SOMEONE IS LOSING CONCIOUSNESS ALL THE CHIT CHAT IN THE WORLD WILL NOT PREVENT IT AT THAT POINT THEY ARE IN SERIOUS DANGER.
“Buuut i don’t wanna take them to the hospital!!!”
WELL SUNSHINE GLAD YOU’D RATHER HAVE A DEAD FRIEND THAN A LIVING ONE BUT YOU’RE IN LUCK
CALL FUCKING POISON CONTROL. THEY ARE NOT THE COPS. THEY WILL HELP YOU.
AND IF THEY SAY GO TO THE FUCKING HOSPITAL YOU GO TO THE FUCKING HOSPITAL. NO EXCUSES. 0. NONE.
I have seen this shit cross my dash SO MANY TIMES so PLEASE fucking reblog this and prevent some well meaning idiot from accidentally killing someone they love!
Please stop and read for a few minutes to help support stigmatized people with dissociative disorders
This isn't for a financial cause, a political statement, or an obligation on your part. You are fully allowed to scroll by. However, you reading and reblogging this post could help save people from falling into ableist ideology. At the very least, please read the TLDRs under each section of this post to understand the gist of the situation, and share
But first, some background, and a vocabulary lesson
What is this post about?
This post is a PSA to spread awareness on the topic of endogenic systems and the Empowered Multiples Movement. This post is strictly against their ideals and is an in-depth explanation of how people in these movements came to be that way, why their actions are harmful to people with dissociative disorders, and what you can do to prevent their ideology from spreading and harming others.
What's the vocabulary we need to know? And what is a complex dissociative disorder?
A complex dissociative disorder is a disorder caused in the developmental stages of a child's life (ages around 4-10 years old, sometimes younger) where the brain develops personality. It is exclusively caused by trauma being inflicted on the child that causes them to dissociate to help them tolerate the trauma or memories of the trauma.
It is a covert disorder, which means it hides its symptoms from its holder, making it difficult for many people to recognize that they are systems or seek help on the matter.
(For extra clarification, this definition is for complex dissociative disorders, and does not include dp/dr or those under that umbrella)
And some vocab...
System
A broad term to refer to someone who claims to have multiple personality states. Despite originally being medical terminology, this term has been stolen by endogenic people.
Singlet
A term to refer to those without dissociative disorders, whose minds present as one connected personality state without dissociative barriers. The average person is this way.
pwCDD
Stands for 'person with a complex dissociative disorder' or 'people with complex dissociative disorders'. Refers to anyone who presents as having a dissociative disorder.
Traumagenic
A term for systems who claims to have their system or personality states borne from trauma. This term has been forced upon people with CDDs in order to differentiate themselves from endogenic systems.
Endogenic
An umbrella term for someone who claims to not have their system or personality states borne from trauma, but from some other reason. Some additions in this umbrella include willogenic, tulpagenic, etc.
Final Fusion
A term to refer to when a pwCDD has their final two personality states merge with each other to create one distinct personality state without dissociative or memory barriers, after intensive therapy and cooperation to integrate these states and remove barriers. While not every system wants to have final fusion, it is generally considered a good thing to look towards and a sign of recovery.
But how do we know that endogenic systems are not real or connected to pwCDDs?
TLDR: Because all psychiatric evidence points against the correlation of endogenic systems and dissociative systems, and there is not much information or proper studies about them existing at all.
The criteria for dissociative identity disorder (DID), the most well known dissociative disorder, is as follows (according to the DSM-5):
The existence of two or more distinct identities (or “personality states”).
The distinct identities are accompanied by changes in behavior, memory and thinking.
The signs and symptoms may be observed by others or reported by the individual. Ongoing gaps in memory about everyday events, personal information and/or past traumatic events.
The symptoms cause significant distress or problems in social, occupational or other areas of functioning.
In addition, the disturbance must not be a normal part of a broadly accepted cultural or religious practice. As noted in the DSM-5-TR1, in many cultures around the world, experiences of being possessed are a normal part of spiritual practice and are not dissociative disorders.
The above statement says it all. Endogenic systems could be considered disturbances created by cultural (see: endo spaces online) or religious (see: the theft of tulpamancy and creation of 'tulpagenic' by endogenic systems online) practices. They do not classify as dissociative disorders and therefore should stay out of areas intended for pwCDDs, and not use the medical terminology for those people.
Why are endogenic systems harmful?
TLDR: Because endogenic systems steal medical terminology and prevent real systems from discovering themselves and seeking help, as well as show an incorrect and romanticized view of dissociative disorders
Endogenic systems break into system spaces by taking medical terminology like 'parts', 'system', 'alters', 'personalities', 'inner world/mindscape', 'fragment', 'persecutor', the list goes on. Endogenic systems take these terms and often misinterpret them, because all of these terms can only manifest in a person if they are a pwCDD who has experienced trauma in their childhood.
Additionally, endogenic systems often spread ideology in their spaces that pertains to hiding or ignoring specific parts of this identity to pwCDDs; an example is how endogenic systems are often against people looking into therapy or recovery, or the idea of final fusion, because endogenic systems do not see dissociative disorders as a DISSOCIATIVE disorder, but as an ALTER disorder (i.e they only care for representing the symptom of having other people in their brain). An alter has no reason to exist if not to protect oneself from trauma... and if you don't have trauma that formed your system, it's impossible to form one.
Endogenic systems often romanticize this idea of being a system: they want to have 'friends in their head' who 'help them with tasks', but are unwilling to accept or acknowledge the other symptoms that often come with being a system, like strong dissociation, memory loss, anxiety, delusions, suicidal and self harm ideation, chronic nightmares, chronic headaches/migraines/stomachaches, and more.
This creates not only a misrepresentation of CDDs to pwCDDs, but also to other people online witnessing it, which makes people take the disorder less seriously. An example might be back in 2020 when lots of people on TikTok were faking DID: when people hear the word, they think of people listing their alters and not representing any of the grittier symptoms, and are less likely to listen to these traumatized people because of this recollection of endogenic systems.
All of this combined leads back to the Empowered Multiples Movement, where the idea of endogenic systems started.
Wait, what's the 'Empowered Multiplicity Movement'?
TLDR: it's a movement from the 1990s-2000s that spawned the idea of endogenic systems and advocated for the removal of DID from medical spaces and the DSM-5
Endogenic systems have had a history stretching back to the 1960s where their term was coined by Sigmund Freud (here it was not referring to this idea of systems, but it is the first known mention of the word 'endogenic' in history).
30 or 40 years after the fact, 'Empowered Multiples' began to show up online, where a few select people began to use the term 'endogenic' to refer to themselves as systems without dissociative disorders.
They also advocated for the removal of DID (or, at the time, MPD) from the DSM, said that those who identified with the term DID or CDD labels were inferior and faking, and would encourage people to write papers and articles against the idea of DID and boycott the term online. They specifically used the term 'natural' to refer to being a system.
It's important to know that this was not a movement borne from love. This movement is, palpably, born from the hatred and purposeful stigmatization of people with DID. The people who spawned the term likely never had system experiences or even fully considered themselves true systems, but did this to hurt people who did.
Why should I, a singlet, care?
Because your care (and reblog/share) can help spread this message to those who need it, and let pwCDDs know that they are safe around you/that you won't tolerate ableism.
Those who have experienced dissociative symptoms, but have never cared to seek out more information or a diagnosis because of the misinformation spread by endogenics, could find this post helpful and end up discovering more about themselves, improving their quality of life significantly. If that's you, and you've been relating to the experiences presented here, I highly recommend you look into scholarly/medical sources and look around CDD spaces for more information.
Why should I, an endogenic system, denounce that title?
Because your title is inherently born from the idea that systems are a fake disorder to make fun of, disrespect, misrepresent, and stigmatize.
If you are experiencing symptoms of a CDD, you should look into medical/scholarly sources for more information. You should not fall for the idea that your trauma was "not enough" for you to be a system. You should not fall for the idea that you didn't "have" trauma. Even if you can't remember your trauma, if you experience symptoms of a CDD, you should look into that more deeply. It may help save your life in the future, or improve your quality of life.
For those of you who are endogenic not because you experience symptoms, but because you want to be, I highly recommend you rethink that idea and look into subjects like kinning, alterhumanity, otherkin, fictionkin, etc., all of which are terms for non-disordered people who might have similar (but not the same) experiences as pwCDDs.
Thank you for reading
And a reminder to please reblog if you found this helpful or informative. Let your disordered friends know that they are loved and welcomed in your community without the stigma spread from endogenics being forced onto them.
If you have anything to add, please feel free to in reblogs or comments
hi, im muyang, i'm a severely disabled (mental + physical) transfeminine intersex person of color stuck at a neglectful and borderline abusive homeless shelter, to keep it short they don't give us enough food to comfortably live off of most of the time, i just want a little money for groceries for this week that's all thank you. please rb to help i don't know what else to do i can't work a job and i don't have any family left who'd be willing to help. please donate anything you can i'm begging. i hate making posts like this because i've been told before it's guilt trippy and manipulative i don't wanna seem that way i just don't like starving im sorry. thank you to anyone who donates no matter how small.
my cashapp is $muyang7 , this is the code below
i have a paypal as well which is @Muyang777
current goal ; 90/100$ (had to up it for enough for groceries this month. sorry)
yk i never rly liked how ezekiel turned completely fuckin Green after just. spending a few months starving in an airplane’s cargo hold. like if there was nuclear waste or sm like in roti i’d understand but no it’s just starvation and malnutrition and lack of sun.
so uh i was bored today so i made a couple edits of how i think his feral form would look
basically his skin’s just sickly-pale instead of straight green. but the green spots are due to the radiation exposure from the toxic waste (since these take place in roti and as respectively). also burns from the volcano. obviously. also also sharp teeth in the second one cuz i rly like them in that shot of him smiling in that bonus clip
I’m ngl while Island is iconic and well-written it is so hard for me to rewatch it for some reason. Like idk I get kinda bored? Maybe that’s not the right word but it doesn’t like boot up the hyperfixation folder in my brain the way that other seasons do even though it technically has some of the funniest jokes and best character writing in the show (shoutout season one Gwen fr one of the characters of all time). But also I feel like I need to rewatch it for context before Action onward. So every time I get like halfway in and give up and never rewatch the series. Agonizing
was mike just carrying around a pendant with his face on it for entirety of ROTI? like where did that come from? he just gave it to zoey out of nowhere. why does he have it? what is the point? why did he bring it onto the show?? like was he thinking that he’d find some random girl to give his face pendant to?
it just seems so random and i don’t understand it at all 😭 you could’ve given her anything man.
i kinda rationalized that in my head as something mike uses to ground himself by looking at his face?? or that it was a gift from someone and he holds onto it because he doesn't get gifts often?? idk
They got me on autism mode five thousand but do you guys ever think about mike and his sys and their relationship with masculinity . Do you guys also think about how having more than one alter who is outwardly and overtly masculine in a more traditional way says something about how Mike grew up and rhe potential stricter gender roles he probably dealt with . Do you guys . Do you
