manda

up all night most nights. living a double life. and i wont send you noodz.

[junkiebabie]

Drugs stayed when you deserted me.

[secrettweak-blog]

Reblog if you’re a tweaker and proud to be one.

[drugs-music-love]

I just want to get high.

Drugs will never hurt you, people will. They will never leave you, people will. Drugs=good. People=bad.

[drughome247]

Reblog if you use methamphetamine. I need more drug friends

[slowbriety]

[prettygirlsgethigh]

Big facts.

[rehabrefugee]

[chronyck]

[c-isnenegro]

““It wasn’t my day. My week. My month. My year. My life. God damn it.””

— Pulp, Charles Bukowski

[depression-took-over-my-liiife]

[goneawaynotcomingback]

I have nothing

Coming down off of meth sucks. What really sucks is being broke and wanting nothing more than to get high. Usually I'm not that worried about getting more to stay high but today it's all I'm worried about. I have no (zero, none, 0) friends. The only person I had in life is gone. I need a fix. I need a rush. Instead of a rush taking over my body only have loneliness, depression and a need for more meth taking over me.

I'm alone with only my thoughts and that's a dangerous thing. At least when I get high my mind stays occupied. At least when I'm high I have dopamine to at least give me the illusion I'm happy.

No friends, no money and no dope is a horrible combination for me tonight. I will continue to cry and wish I had more meth. I'll keep wishing I had a single friend to talk to. I'll keep being lonely and sad. And you know what... no one cares. The only person who cares about me is me and anymore I barely care.

I'm done bitching.

[trackmarx-and-tattoos-blog]

You know how us girls like to do a little dance in our seat when we get served the food at a restaurant? That’s me when I’m preparing for my next fix lol

[xnfinite-dreams]

Everyone always asks why I’m so quiet but sometimes I wont shut up about myself and it sucks because I know it just looks like I feel sorry for myself but it’s just cause I dont have anyone to talk to and so I just kind of embarrass myself publically everytime I speak and I dont know how to stop

[gretagerwisg]

#same

[goneawaynotcomingback]

Did anyone ever buy you those rigs?

Yes 200 of them

[wolf-fxxx]

Addiction

This may be Fan-fiction below this post, but for me it was reality. Im almost coming on 2 years sober and the withdrawl pain, I would never wish that kind of torture on anyone, it lasted weeks and months . To go through withdrawl from the two most dangerous addictive substances cold turkey was hell, I wanted to die, the pain was so horrible, I was going to do anything to stop it, I told myself I dont care if I have to finish myself off right now just to make the pain stop, I had to fight to convince myself that living for others was more important than my current pain, that my thoughts of suicide were selfish to my family and friends, that this pain was only temporary, it was tough as hell. I know what real pain is now and when you’re that close to death..you start to see things, strange things will all the sudden visit you in those dark moments when you feel your spirit leaving and your body giving way. I believe in a Hell and I believe in a Heaven more than ever before, I believe we can create our own Heaven and Hell and some things on a spiritual level resonate with that energy we give out, its an invation to what you want to attract, weather we are aware of it or not, we attract the energy we give out to the world, things we cant see are, waiting for us to make a choice darkness or light, love or hate, life or death.

One day at a time .

If anyone is going through the same addiction, I hope you can get comfort from this post. I hope it helps you too in some way and that you are more than enough.

It feels great to finally be a sober thinker. I just dont like how Im so serious now, I was never really that happy, I was just really fucking high, maybe I was always a little more serious than I thought.

[the-drug-addicts-diary]

“they will prepare you for your first high. they will tell you what to expect, they will tell you all they can about the taste, the sting, the rush. they will tell you how you might feel euphoric, how it will be fun and how you will enjoy literally every second of it, how you will wish these moments could last forever. but they won’t prepare you for your first crash. they won’t tell you about the suffering of addicted soul and mind. they won’t tell you how painful it is to crave another hit, but realizing it won’t really give you what you want or need. they won’t tell you about the desperation, lies, fights, tears, consequences, fear, psychosis, injuries and how you will wish these moments wouldn’t last forever…while knowing they probably will.”

— 14 hours of sobriety