song of myself

I was born very far from where I'm supposed to be and so I'm on my way home. (Whoever brought me here, will have to take me home.) ♒ "When I met her I thought, 'Oh god, she's in love with me,' and it took me a while and I realized she's in love with the world."

[girlmostlikely]

This is sooooo me ❤️‍🩹

[petaltexturedskies]

I also felt that she was holding herself together with a safety pin, was forcing herself to be clear, articulate, active—to keep moving, one step ahead of the sledgehammer of grief.

James Baldwin, The Evidence of Things Not Seen

[dionysian-mystery]

Are you becoming what you've always hated?

Isle of Dogs / Game of Thrones / Painting by Jenn Mazza / Unknown / Ancestral Memory by Hari Alluri / Unknown / Venetta Octavia / Emma Tranter / Unknown / Ninth House by Leigh Bardugo / @ machineryangel

[scytheos]

oh

[gobloggirl]

[rozieramati]

[singing-bowl]

thinking about how ursula k leguin said "what goes too long unchanged destroys itself. The forest is forever because it dies and dies and so lives" and how everyday i wake up slightly different and i can feel myself shed the skin of who i used to be slowly, slowly, until i look back and can scarcely recognise who i was... but also she is still a part of me, part of the leaf litter and the humus, supporting me as i send new roots down and new leaves stretching up to the sunlight

[missedstations]

“Monologue for an Onion” - Suji Kwock Kim

I don’t mean to make you cry. I mean nothing, but this has not kept you From peeling away my body, layer by layer, The tears clouding your eyes as the table fills With husks, cut flesh, all the debris of pursuit. Poor deluded human: you seek my heart. Hunt all you want. Beneath each skin of mine Lies another skin: I am pure onion–pure union Of outside and in, surface and secret core. Look at you, chopping and weeping. Idiot. Is this the way you go through life, your mind A stopless knife, driven by your fantasy of truth, Of lasting union–slashing away skin after skin From things, ruin and tears your only signs Of progress? Enough is enough. You must not grieve that the world is glimpsed Through veils. How else can it be seen? How will you rip away the veil of the eye, the veil That you are, you who want to grasp the heart Of things, hungry to know where meaning Lies. Taste what you hold in your hands: onion-juice, Yellow peels, my stinging shreds. You are the one In pieces. Whatever you meant to love, in meaning to You changed yourself: you are not who you are, Your soul cut moment to moment by a blade Of fresh desire, the ground sown with abandoned skins. And at your inmost circle, what? A core that is Not one. Poor fool, you are divided at the heart, Lost in its maze of chambers, blood, and love, A heart that will one day beat you to death.                        

[typewriter-worries]

Monologue for an Onion, Suji Kwock Kim

Notebooks: “Ah, Mon Cahier, čoute”, Marian Engel

The Carrying, Ada Limón

Crush, Richard Siken

[hopelessvalentines]

went thru my photos on my phone to find all these i’ve saved over time ~

@berecovered @rosegardenboyfriend

[happyk44]

[Text ID: 1. Later, you said: "how are you feeling now?"

And I said, "better." And I meant it.

Sometimes, better is all you can ask for.

2. what is a person, if not the marks they leave behind?

3. And I want to go home But I am home

4. I am a mosaic of everyone I have ever known and loved and touched and I find fragments of them in my playlists and how I make my tea. we may not know each other any more but we will stay connected like this. I hope a fragment of me is with you too.

5. "It was a long time ago. It doesn't matter anymore. And yet I cannot let it go. I cannot let it go."

6. maybe you were put on this earth to be tender and loving during a time when you are expected to be cruel and calloused

7. You changed yourself: you are not who you are,

Your soul cut moment to moment by a blade Of fresh desire, the ground sown with abandoned skins. And at your inmost circle, what? A core that is

Not one. Poor fool, you are divided at the heart, Lost in its maze of chambers, blood, and love, A heart that will one day beat you to death.

8. "no one would care if 1 grain of sand left the beach"

"But by removing a grain of sand can cause all the little grains of sand around it to fall" /end ID]

Sources: 1. Sue Zhao; 2. The Invisible Life of Addie LaRue by V.E. Schwab; 3. Unknown; 4. @/berecovered; 5. Sylvia Plath, from a letter to Ruth Tiffanny Beauscher; 6. @/rosegardenboyfriend; 7. Monologue for an Onion by Suji Kwock Kim; 8. Tiktok

[harlows-monkeys]

Wind, Sand and Stars | Antoine de Saint-Exupéry

Lemon Bush, Bermuda | John Pfhal

Asking the Way | Ko Un; Translated by Suji Kwock Kim & Sunja Kim Kwock

Basket full of lemons | SOCH Outreach Foundation, Karachi, Pakistan

When We Cease to Understand the World | Benjamín Labatut

[thecollectibles]

Art by Vadim Koval

[lunamonchtuna]

— Mary Lambert, Shame Is an Ocean I Swim Across; "You Are with the Wrong Person" (via lunamonchtuna)

[chahatkesafar]

[chahatkesafar]

[brightdeadthing]

love as recognition

anna gavalda / friedrich nietzsche / clarice lispector / jandy nelson / rebecca perry / mhairi mcfarlane

[lucidloving]

@roach-works // Melissa Broder, "Problem Area" // Mary Oliver, "The Return" // @annavonsyfert // Koyoharu Gotouge, Demon Slayer // Haruki Murakami, Dance Dance Dance // David Levithan, How They Met and Other Stories // Tennessee Williams, Notebooks

[grabbelton]

"I can't go on. I'll go on."