Volcanic Love

"Waiting is painful. Forgetting is painful. But not knowing which to do is the worst kind of suffering."-Paulo Coelho Grace Ko | 50 | Author

[grace-ko]

“Oh god, have you heard enough? I’ve heard enough,” Grace groaned, taking Ember’s arm so they could both walk away from the two guys who wouldn’t leave them alone by the bar. “If I wasn’t gay before,” they teased and knocked back the rest of their drink before flagging down someone to get them another one. The kids were in the city with their grandparents so the house was empty and they felt like a teenager on spring break. So naturally they were going to get fucking wasted. “Is it too cold out to get some air? I’m feeling risky, you don’t have any cigarettes on you, do you?” @emberraerussell​

[grace-ko]

msalexandriafortier·:

location: anywhere

status: open @silverliningstarters

Alexandria was surprised that she could get lost in a city half the size of NYC. She’d always seemed to know the Big Apple like the back of her hand. Granted she had lived there for years and she was really only in a couple of the boroughs. Still she could swear she’d circled this block twice now just trying to find one place. Her eyes directed toward the storefronts as she turned the corner, she didn’t notice the other until she’d run right into them. “I’m sorry, I was not paying attention to where I was going” 

***

“Oh jesus,” Grace muttered as they came to a stop and did their best not to drop the bags in their hands. “No, no it’s fine. I was so caught up in this article, I barely looked up.” Grace managed to peel their eyes away from their phone, trying to quell the anger? jealousy? It was something after reading Alana’s new article that had been published in the Times that morning. It was good, almost too good but Alana’s talent had never been a question. Still, Grace’s attention was pulled as they looked over the woman, a sweeter smile taking place of their confusion and abruptness. “The Valentine’s Day decorations are pretty gorgeous, huh? Are you more of a pro or anti v-day type of person?”

[grace-ko]

lexidekker·:

“No, it’s not a bribe - it’s a ‘sorry I haven’t seen you in two weeks, i forgot to come by’ gift.” Lexi grinned before leaning back into the couch, and pulling her phone out of her pocket. “Ooh, it’s one of those plaid skirts that look like Cher from clueless. You know the 90′s trends are coming back.” Pulling up the picture of the skirt the bought and she showed Grace the skirt. “Google master, show me your magic.” 

***

“Oh well in that case, feel free to disappear whenever,” they teased with a wink and another hefty bite. “Oh that is very, very cute and you are going to look..so good in it, truly, god, do you think I could pull something like that off?” Grace laughed softly, knowing Lexi would say yet but Lexi also seemed to forget often that they were 50 and not in their 20s anymore. Though Lexi also brought out a younger side of them. “That reminds me, I may or may not have...date this weekend? Maybe I should buy this skirt so I could wear it then, huh?”

[grace-ko]

lexidekker·:

@grace-ko·

“I brought you a cupcake.” Lexi said as she extended her arm towards Grace, and placed it in their hand. “You’re welcome.” She grinned, before walking towards the couch and plopping down. Grace of course had been someone Lexi looked up too, as if they were a second parent to her. “You know I got this really cute skirt today, and they left the little tag on it that stops you from stealing it. I was really confused by that. Like how did I even walk out?”

**

“Oh no, what do you want? Is this a bribe?” Grace raised an eyebrow as they watched Lexi before sticking their tongue out to try the frosting before they took a bite. “Oh shit, that’s good. Whatever you want it’s a yes,” Grace teased. Having Lexi over was always a treat and although Grace had assumed a motherly role for most of the younger people they met, Lexi held a special place in their heart. Plus, she brought cupcakes, how could you compete with that? “They probably have a busted alarm system. I think I have a friend who has one of the machines you can use to take them off though. Or we could google it. What kind of skirt is it?”

[grace-ko]

mrscelestea​:

celeste tried a bit of the cashew dip, immediately widening her eyes after: “oh, this is delicious! thank you. and honestly, even if it weren’t, i have literally no room to judge – my rice turned to goop yesterday!” she exclaimed with a laugh, cleaning her hands on a napkin. during her first marriage, she had been a student and had survived mostly on take-out, then when she married oscar, they had had a maid. and, between the two of them, her second husband had been much more of a ‘model housewife’ than she ever could.

the american-turkish woman grabbed her glass, drinking a bit of wine before continuing. “why did noah punch the boy?” she asked, furrowing her eyebrows while twirling the class – she was certain noah had a good reason, but she still felt curious as to what that reason was. “maybe a five?” celeste chuckled, “amelia’s grandparents have been driving me insane if i’m to be honest… for the first time since her birth, they are showing some interest in her and they want me to send her to spend a weekend with them, by herself!” she exclaimed, one hand gesticulating her aggravation. “i understand that they are her greandparents, i do” she told them while bringing one hand going to her chest, “but she’s just turned one year old and had her whole life altered forever… wouldn’t home visitations make more sense?”. then, with a small smile to grace, she added: “i feel like channelling noah and punching someone”.

***

**

Grace couldn’t even hide how pleased it made them to see how much Celeste liked the dip. It was truly the little things in life that made it worth it. Being able to feed the people they cared about in a way that they actually enjoyed was definitely one of those things. “goop? oh honey, i’m going to get you a rice cooker or better yet just send you home with lots of leftovers. You cannot go on with goopy rice, that’s just..that’s just a tragedy.” Grace cringed as they thought about it and made a mental note to order something for Celeste next time they were on the computer. 

“Oh because she’s a little activist and the kid was picking on another kid. And then when she stepped in, he made a comment about her moms and well one thing led to the other. I mean I blame my ex wife. It’s hard enough our kids had two moms but now they had to have two divorced moms? Though I suppose if anything it makes them more relatable to half of the other kids in their grade,” they added with a soft laugh and a eye roll before taking another sip of their wine. Grace kept their eyes on Celeste as they listened, understanding how hard it was to be expected to just trust someone else with your child as if  they were some novelty item. “Well, while I’m not anti-violence, I do think there are a few things you can do before throwing punches. Though I’m sure Noah would be happy to teach you,” they teased. “Anyway, you have every right to put your foot down. A sleepover is a big jump. They could at least come over for..tea or something. I’d be happy to help you host them. Are they like..good people to be around or..?”

[grace-ko]

Location: Grace’s House in Finch’s Lake Tagging: @mrscelestea​

“Okay so you have to be honest with me because I’ve never made this dip before but I saw it on the food network at like 3am when I couldn’t sleep,” Grace joked as they came back to the table both with the homemade hummus they usually made and the cashew dip they were trying out for the first time. “Let me top you off,” Grace added and poured Celeste a bit more wine before settling back in their seat. They finished off their glass before pouring a bit more. “So, on a scale of 1-10, how are we feeling about motherhood this week?” Grace smirked as they reached for their glass and a few chips. “Considering I spent the weekend trying not to have a heart attack every time my son gets behind the wheel to practice. And oh, Noah had to be called into the principle this week because she punched a boy in the face. Which...she had good reason so you can imagine my conversation with the principal went well.”

[isabellaofparma]

Why Women Kill | 1.05 - “There’s No Crying in Murder”

[grace-ko]

al-damiri-phd·:

Tereik didn’t know almost anyone in Amory, so having Grace there was a godsend or he’d rarely leave his house, and he had a tendency to isolate himself even when he wasn’t in a strange new place.  “I haven’t seen much outside of my Spotify recap, apparently all I do is listen to Queen and history podcasts, which shouldn’t surprise anyone who knows me.”  He couldn’t help but smile, a lot of times he hated being asked how he was feeling, but as he was still sporting a fairly wicked black eye from the seizure he had at the grocery store a few days earlier and it was nice that they cared enough to ask.  “I’m alright, the worst is over for now, at least until it happens again, that’s just my life. “  Tereik and his family never celebrated Christmas outside of enjoying a couple of days off, so he’d never even considered getting gifts for people, but now he was realizing he probably should have thought about that.  “I’m wearing 10.5 right now, so I guess that’s what I’m wearing.  I haven’t even thought about the holiday this year, it’s been so busy with the move, you might be getting a “New Years gift” instead, if that’s alright.” 

****

“Oh? Did you have a most played podcast this year? I’m always looking for new ones to add to my list.” They knew that Tereik didn’t exactly like to answer the question of how he was doing but Grace had usually taken a direct approach with him to actually find out what was going on instead of letting him push it off. “Mm, have you put anything on that eye? I may have a few things to help with the coloring and bruising. You did ice it, right?” Grace took a breath in an attempt to take a step back from mothering but couldn’t really help it. “And next time feel free to call me afterwards, I’ll be happy to pick you up or find you wherever you are,” they offered, their hand hovering over Tereik’s hand with an affectionate smile before they went back to their mimosa in front of them. “Very good to know and don’t even worry about it, I always have some extra gifts if you need any help. I do love a New Years gift,” they added with a smirk. “How is the move going by the way?”

[grace-ko]

mrnicholaskent·:

Nick was thankful for Grace. She always seemed to check in on him, granted he returned the favor with Allen making sure he was healing properly. It was one thing he liked about the small town, it allowed him to be a bit more personable. “Of course I’m sleeping, it’s just during the daytime and not always well. But my caffeine addiction keeps me going, so there’s no worries.” He winks to her, “You can worry about me any time, I’ll always be glad to be your excuse to eat your weight in ribs. How about you? How are you doing?” 

****

“Everything you said in that sentence is concerning. Sleeping in the day time is never the same. It basically allows you to live in an alternate reality where time doesn’t exist. Which...time doesn’t actually exist but that’s an existential crisis for another time,” they joked and shook their head before reaching for their drink. “It’s just they’re so good and Tony is such a sweetheart. I’ve had so much good BBQ but when Tony says it’s the best you’ve ever had, he does not lie for a moment. Me? Mm, I’m doing just fine, it’s the holiday season so lots of gift shopping, fully indulging in the holiday cheer.” It was the first Christmas without Alana and they were doing their best to make sure the kids didn’t feel it too much, even though they’d be going to Alana’s house during the holiday week. It was different, everything was, even for them. Shopping alone this year had been hard. “Which reminds me, what size shirt are you? Just for..curiosity’s sake. Have you done any gift shopping?”

[shesnake]

Lucy Liu on The Drew Barrymore Show, 15 September 2020.

[grace-ko]

Location: Tony’s BBQ Tagging: @mrnicholaskent​

"So..should I bother to ask if you’re sleeping or not? Or let the eye bags speak for itself?” Grace smirked as they looked him over, having met him through Allen’s injuries but as with most people they had become fairly invested in his well being. Which is why on his lunch break, they were treating him to a mini feast, both as a thank you and a check in. “Not to sound like a mother but I do worry and also needed someone to indulge me in eating my weight in ribs. Whenever Tony sees me here he also always gives me extra cornbread so let’s hope he’s here.”

[grace-ko]

icandiceriley​:

▂

Candice thought for a second before smiling. “Shit, G. That’s a perfect idea! Ugh, you saved me several hair washes and pruny fingers on both of our hands.” she chuckled before filling up Grace’s wine glass. She smiled softly as Grace described what they had been up to. “Ace, I thought we had talked about other possible things we could do other than cyber stalking because it was hurting us more than helping us.” she said with a soft sigh. She really did worry about her friend getting too wrapped up in the mistress. “Fuck Gwen.” she frowned. “She probably wouldn’t be happy to know that her husband stares at my boobs and tries to cop a feel more than a few times. He’s one more encounter away from a throat chop.” she said as she chopped the air with her hand before chuckling softly.

“When will they learn that they can’t rush perfection?” she sighed with a smile to Grace. Candice took a breath at their question and a long sip from her wine glass. “First off, you don’t have to thank me for dinner. I’m glad you enjoyed it. Second, I was going to pretend I never sent those drunk texts and as well as pretending that day never happened.” she sighed, biting her lip. “Which reminds me. You have every right to cut me off after my second glass because a hangover is not the same in your thirties as it was in your twenties.” she grinned. Another sigh and sip made Candice more ready to talk. “Ángel kissed me at the festival and I spiraled. It was stupid and immature and I’m slightly ashamed of myself.”

***

“I have my genius moments, is that not what you keep me around for?” They rolled their eyes playfully before taking a sip of their wine. “I know, I know but when it’s late and I can’t sleep and my phone is right there...” another sigh and another sip, “I know I need to stop but I can’t. It’s dangerously addicting.” Grace let out a snort of a laugh and leaned into Candice a bit. “As much as I would love to see you throat chop him, I can’t have you banned from the premises, I don’t know what I’d do without you. Gwen on the other hand, I would totally slap the bitch. I think I could get away with it. But let me stop talking about it or then it’ll be premeditated,” they teased, though it was highly likely it’d come to that if the woman kept pushing Grace the way she did. 

“Mm, when you get hungover in your 50s then you can talk to me,” they teased. “We don’t have to talk about them but we should, especially if you haven’t talked about them to anyone else. Does your therapist know?” They raised an eyebrow before the next words had their eyes widening slightly. “Okay he kissed you? Did you kiss him back? Did you want to kiss him? You know I always admired the relationship you two had but I always suspected there was something I mean you did have a kid together, you’re both young, attractive, single. Are you spiraling because of him or because of Roane?” Grace said the name almost in a whisper even though there was no need to but they knew how sensitive of a subject it was and they didn’t want to push it if Candi didn’t want to talk about it. “More importantly, why was I not invited to your pity party? I would have been great company.”

[grace-ko]

Location: Sunday Brunch at Lucy’s Place  Tagging: @al-damiri-phd​

“I feel like all I’ve done the path month is read end of the year reviews and best of lists. I have to say, the list is looking so much more diverse than it has been. We must be doing something right out here.” Grace smiled softly as they finally closed up the newspaper they had been reading while waiting for him. Since had had moved to Amory, Grace had tried to keep up with Tereik as much as possible and since the divorce, they had found their friendships to basically be their lifeline. It helped remind them of just how big the world was, especially when their conversations with Tereik took them so many places. “How’ve you been feeling? Also..what size are you in shoes again? Just a gift related question.”

[grace-ko]

Location: Ko Household in Finch’s Lake Tagging: @edgaryang​

“Alright you two, that’s enough, this one has homework to do.” Grace smirked as they plucked off their sons headset as he sat next to Edgar on the couch after dinner. They had let the boys played video games for a good hour and a half after dinner but Allen had homework to do and if he wanted to stay on the basketball team this year then he needed to keep his grades up. “And you, Mr. Yang, are going to help me make some hot chocolate,” they informed him with a growing smile and gave his shoulder a squeeze. “And hopefully tell me about your week. Nothing notable, I hope? Staying out of trouble? You can lie to me if you need but  I wouldn’t suggest it. I’m a great bullshit detector.”

[grace-ko]

icandiceriley·:

Who: @grace-ko·

Where: Candice’s House in Beatrice’s Landing (I feel like she has a revolving front door lol)

“So after watching The Grinch: the Musical, Jaden decided she wants to dress up as The Grinch next Halloween but the one where his heart is big because she simply can’t hate Christmas. Her words not mine.” she chuckled as she sipped from her wine glass. “And you know she’s going to want me to paint her green. Like all green. Green body and green hair. You saw how much she committed to Angelica Schuyler this year. She’s like her dad. Go big or go home.” she smiled with a shake of her head.

Candice finished packing up the rest of their dinner for Grace to take home and placed it on the table so she wouldn’t forget. “Do you need a refill?” she asked shaking the wine bottle at them. She walked over and brought the bottle with her setting it on the tray on the ottoman before sitting on the couch next to Grace. “So what’s been going on with you, Ace of Grace? We gotta catch up.” she smiled tapping their knee softly.

***

“You could just get her one of those green body suits, like the elastic ones? Of course she wants to be Grinch but nice. She’s truly a trendsetter. I’m sure if you ask Ángel he’ll match with her too. He could totally pull off dying his beard temporarily green. She did have an amazing costume this year. You really outdid yourself with that dress.” Grace nodded and held out their glass for a refill, smiling at the nickname as they took a sip. “Me? Not much aside from cyber stalking my ex wife’s mistress, PTA shit, I swear I’m about to get into it with that bitch Gwen from Amory Manor. Just because she and her husband decided to have an army of kids does not mean she runs the school, you know what I’m saying? Anyway,” they sighed and took a hefty sip of their wine. “Otherwise I’ve been fine, you know me, trucking along, writing, trying to get my publisher to stop breathing down my neck. And you, my dear?” They reached out to give Candi’s knee a squeeze. “Are we going to talk about the drunky texts you sent me the other day or not? Any thoughts swirling around that gorgeous brain of yours that you want to share? Dinner was delicious by the way, thank you.”

[shesnake]

Lucy Liu in Stage Mother (2020) dir. Thom Fitzgerald

[grace-ko]

audrcyfa·:

@silverliningstarters· | persephone books | tuesday, 6:15 PM

It’s not the first time her therapist has suggested her a book; like the others, the one in her hand will likely end up on her bedside table. It won’t gather dust because Audrey cleans her places neurotically every Sunday, but the spine won’t be cracked open until she’s deep enough into a wine bottle to contemplate self-actualization. Still, Audrey always enjoyed visiting the bookstore, perusing the stands for something more enjoyable to read – perhaps a memoir or some poetry, she’d always enjoyed those. Instead her eyes land on a figure reading the back of a novel that was meant to be a best seller. Audrey knew better. “Trust me, you don’t want that,” she asserts boldly, offering an apologetic smile for interrupting their time. “It’s highly overrated.”

***

Grace’s smile grew slowly before they laughed and nodded. “You’re not wrong but my friend wrote it so I have to show support some way. I mean he’s full of shit but occasionally he writes a decent book. And he always picks up the check whenever we go to dinner,” they added with a smirk and tucked the book under their arm. “I appreciate the honesty though, what are you reading or looking for?” They raised an eyebrow and naturally moved them towards the ‘K’ section in fiction, their fingers brushing along the few books by them there, pulling out one before taking out a pen to sign it. “Is this a bit egotistical? Perhaps, but that’s between you and me.”