broken.

PERCIVAL GRAVES indie potterverse rp tag: gravefate written by belinda

[gravefate]

rvliance:

istudythem:

@rvliance​ | @gravefate​

Newt is patient, has to be patient, in waiting for an answer of some sort from the older wizard. He wanted to be fully prepared for any sort of answer he could get, and the unrestrained magic could have just as easily been aimed at himself or Credence if they had surprised the man. Intruding would have only made it all worse, and so it’s nearly easy to wait.

When they are invited in though, he releases an invisible breath of relief and is first to do so. He still keeps himself between Graves and Credence, and he still moves slowly, but there is no hesitance or uncertainty in his steps.

“No need to apologise, magic has to go somewhere when everything else is overwhelming,” Newt gently assured, offering a small smile despite the other not looking him in the eye. Give it time, Newt. His hurt is still fresh, he reminded himself. 

“Mister Graves, this is Credence, and he and I would like to talk to you for a bit. Is that alright?”

He’s careful to make it clear by his tone there isn’t any judgment for lapse of control, and he doesn’t look at the wounds or shaking hands Percival has, keeping the majority of his focus on the other’s face in a mix of curiosity and cautious optimism. Credence remained close enough that Newt’s fingers were still touching his hand, ready to offer comfort at a breath’s notice if needed.

@gravefate​ | @istudythem​

Fingers tighten around Newt’s fingers when he sees Graves. The real Graves. Something dark shudders inside, and crawls up. It’s not the same man, he has to remind himself that. He has to do a double take, unlike Newt he can’t help but look at the damage that’s been done.  There’s something broken in the man, and now Credence can’t help but see the difference now. Grindelwald would never hold himself in such a way. It makes him sad, to see how much one man could make them both suffer. His stomach turns, he’s endured nothing compared to Mister Graves.  Blue eyes are cast downward to his and Newt’s hand. He lets up gently so he makes sure he isn’t hurting the other, it’d not been a concern until now. He swallows back the feelings of betrayal and hate, those were for another man. Not this one.        “…H-Hello, sir.” 

@rvliance | @istudythem

Hearing the name Credence made Percival freeze. That name. It echoes in his head and suddenly it’s almost as if Percival is back in the freezing darkness hearing Grindelwald’s voice, hearing the man taunt him about using the boy to help him find the obscurial. But the boy was the obscurial. He should be dead but he wasn’t. It’s all so confusing, so overwhelming.

Percival doesn’t realize he was making the room shake until a nearby vase fell over and smashed on the ground. It jolted him from the memory and he clutched his head and closed his eyes, trying to breath and calm down as he was told to do by the healers.

It seemed to take forever but his mind eventually quieted down. Percival wonders if he had already scared both of them away. He opens his eyes and finds a tiny bit of courage to look towards the two people in his room apologetically, “I’m sorry...” The apology seems weak even to his ears. He was a mess indeed and it only made him feel more useless, more embarassed.

“Yes, we can talk....please...sit down...” He gestures to the chairs nearby, “Hello...Credence...”

[gravefate]

Blog will be on low activity.

[warheroics-blog]

Belinda’s Blog Cleanup 2017

As many many know, I have way too many blogs than I can really keep up with, and in the next few months and perhaps years, it will get even harder to try and keep active on everything. My attempts to try and keep up coupled with busy real life has just not mixed well and it’s effecting my ability to be active. 

Because of this, I had to force myself to make the decision to close down and archive some of my blogs and really dramatically cut down the number of blogs I actually could really be active on so I can properly devote myself to everyone I’m RPing with.

With that said, here’s how things will go from here. The blogs below are grouped into three different sections:

 The Active section will consist of blogs that I will be devoting the majority of my time on. 

The Semi-Active | Low Activity section will consist of blogs that I will occasionally go on when the muse finds me, these are blogs that I’m not yet willing to part with because there are still people that I’ve promised interactions to - usually one or two people on each of those blogs that I still have threads with that I will continue to do when I can.

The Closed | Archived section will consist of all the blogs that from this point on will no longer be active, they are finished and the blogs will now exist as archives.

Hopefully with this clean up, it will make things a lot easier for me to keep up with and won’t run me ragged.

————————————

ACTIVE (7)

Theseus Scamander (Fantastic Beasts/HP) - @warheroics

Alfred Pennyworth (Gotham) - @waynesprotector

Sebastian Rivers (ASOIAF/GOT) - @dutyandhcnor

Lothar Karstark (ASOIAF/GOT) - @thebcneless

Jon Solo (Star Wars) - @greatpxwer

Davits Draven (Star Wars) - @allianceintel

Magnus of Mercia (Vikings) - blog incoming

SEMI-ACTIVE | LOW ACTIVITY (9)

Harley Keener (MCU) - @starkconnected

Isaac Hughes-Stark (MCU) - @osirisrebcrn

Percival Graves (Fantastic Beasts/HP) - @gravefate

Magnus Graves (Fantastic Beasts/HP) - @immcvable

Brand of Dale (LOTR/Hobbit) - @martyrxdking

Brandon Snow (ASOIAF/GOT) - @northernseer

Gryff Whitehill (ASOIAF/GOT/TTGOT) - @sxmethingtoprxve

Ashley Stubbs (Westworld) - @galifuckinleo

Hel Greyback (Fantastic Beasts/HP) - @hxllhxund

CLOSED | ARCHIVED (9)

Sam Chisolm (Magnificent Seven) - @dulysworn

Cole Rogers-Stark (MCU/Marvel Comics) - @starkspangledjunior

Jack Thompson II (MCU) - @thompsonlegacy

Sam Kirk (Star Trek) - @firstbornkirk

Lorian (Star Trek) - @cptnlorian

Rickon Stark (ASOIAF/GOT) - @wildandfierce

Snap Wexley (Star Wars) - @snappyrecon

Mattia Solo (Star Wars) - @flawlessincompetency

Gareth Mallory (James Bond) - @lxngmayhereign

[gravefate]

PSA - low activity til 2/4/17

so for the next week and a half, my activity will be very spotty, I will be on when I can and do replies when I can. I have a law school entrance exam on Saturday the 4th so I really do have to pay attention more on that and it makes it hard to keep up with postings.

but I should be back more active once the exam is over though it won’t be until March 1 that all my blogs may be back to being active as that’s when law school applications are done.

you guys can still reach me on IMs and skype though (feel free to ask for my skype if you want) and send me asks too!

hopefully all will go well! :)

[gravefate]

rvliance:

@gravefate & @istudythem​

How far they’d come. He can’t speak for Mister Scamander or Graves but he can speak for himself. He’d been shaking and torn up from the spells that they’d cast at him. He’s still a mess when Newt had saved him. How far he’d come.  He’d been staying with Newt, in his case. It’d been the most magical experience he’d ever encountered. He remembers asking how it did that, or why it worked in such a way. Magic. He eventually stopped asking, not because Newt had been unkind he’d been patient and loving the whole time, but eventually he just knew magic was the cause.  Magic healed his wounds and made some of them shine. Magic couldn’t help the deeper wounds though, the ones that Grindelwald left behind. The ones that made him cry out and Newt be there to comfort him. He feels like he’s making progress but still there are days he struggles. He struggles the day Newt asks him to meet the real Mister Graves.  Credence KNOWS saying no would be alright, he’d learned that from Newt. Take care of yourself before others. The young man has to think on it, it’d been the first time  in weeks that his creature had raised its head up. He convinces himself to go, to see the man that Grindelwald had tricked him with.  He holds on to Newt when they get close to the door, there’s almost a sign of protest but he drops it. He’d not been in any hurry to see the broken man in the room in front of him. Gazing over the broken remnants of the door, he hands his head. The creature doesn’t lift up his head but stays silent even with the nerves crashing through him. 

@istudythem​ & @rvliance​

There’s a ringing in his head, cancelling out all other thoughts or sounds. It makes him hurt and he wants to cry. He doesn’t know why but he does. It makes him feel more pathetic than he already is.

But somehow a voice breaches through all of the ringing, causing the noise to fade away, and he hears the name Scamander - Theseus? No. This is the younger brother, Newt. The one with the case. The one who saw through Grindelwald. The one who is the reason he’s even alive.

Percival doesn’t think he’s in a state to see anyone. He’s laid up on this bed like an invalid, they don’t want him to leave. His body spends more time sleeping than awake. His magic is not working the way it had been before. He tires easily. His right leg still broken and mangled and maybe never getting back to full strength. He looks gaunt, weak, nothing like the way he wants to present himself.

But how could he deny the man who saved his life? If Newt Scamander hadn’t discovered the truth, just how long would he have been stuck in that dark cold prison? Just how long before Grindelwald grew tired and finally killed him?

“I...I’m sorry....” His voice sounds weak even to his own ears, shaky and weak. “Please...come in...”

He grips his hands together to stop them from shaking less, He feels embarassed for his display of uncontrolled magic. What Mr. Scamander must think of him. What they all must think of him. He doesn’t dare to look up and see any judgment reflecting from the other’s eyes, so he keeps his gaze to his tightly gripped hands.

[gravefate]

@istudythem & @rvliance

He’s been in the hospital for a week, at least, he thinks it’s been a week. His sense of time has been off for a while now and it’s still taking its sweet time to recover. If only that was the only thing that needs to recover. 

Seraphina came earlier in the day, her face grim and bearing bad news. The news of his impersonation by Grindelwald, the incident in New York, and his capture, torture, and rescue had spread. And despite her and Theseus Scamander’s best, the international confederation was strongly calling for his resignation, citing a weariness to trust him, his possible mental instability stemming from his confinement, and the simple reality that he had not been strong enough to stop Grindelwald. They saw it as him unable to do his job, now they wanted someone else. He was being forced out, as quietly as possible.

If he was at his best, he could have fought them on it, he would never quietly resign. But he had nearly collapsed a wall three days past because of a nightmare, his hands hadn’t stopped shaking since he woke up, and he finds himself unable to meet people’s eyes. He didn’t want to consider it, he didn’t want to entertain the notion, but reality had come crashing down after Seraphina’s words and he had to face it. They would never trust him again, and to be quite honest, he wasn’t sure he could trust himself anymore either. 

So he had given Seraphina an answer, and now he had no job, no purpose. His hands shaking even worse since Seraphina left. What was he to do? His whole life had been all for this, his job, it had never occurred to him to consider any other alternatives. But who would want him? Who would trust him? What did he have left?

He hadn’t noticed he had clenched his fists tightly, emotions swelling up in him faster than he could control, and suddenly the closed door to his hospital room flew off its hinges and shattered into pieces against the wall in the hallway.

Percival Graves simply stared at the destruction, the door in pieces, broken, just like his life, just like him.

[gravefate]

lcgilimens:

she stopped dead in her tracks, refusing to even look at the wizard. she hadn’t meant to see anything ( normally his thoughts were so guarded she didn’t have to even worry about accidentally reading him ) but as she passed him in the lobby of macusa headquarters, she’d brushed against his mind. he wasn’t supposed to know ––––– no one ( save for tina ) at macusa knew of her legilimency. it was her biggest and most carefully kept secret. even as she tried to keep herself from his thoughts, mister graves’ fear flashed through her mind. 

“ i’m so sorry, mister graves. i didn’t mean to, honest. ” her voice is hushed, barely audible over the normal hustle of the witches and wizards around them. please don’t tell anyone.

He shouldn’t have snapped. Queenie Goldstein was hardly an enemy, she was a sweet person whom Percival had never sensed any malice from, just kindness. Snapping at her of all people was just another evidence of his frail and anxious mind, and he hated himself for being like that, for being weak.

“It’s...it’s fine...I shouldn’t have snapped...” He just...what was he really? Tired? Broken? Weak? Useless? At this point he doesn’t really know. He needs to be better than this.

[gravefate]

rvliance:

 Mister Scamander had found him after the ordeal after they had attempted to kill him. He somehow survived it and  the obscurus, that’s what Mister Scamander called it, had been weakened. He had removed it, and Credence had the scars to prove it.  Mister Scamander had explained all he could, that it had been a dark wizard Grindelwald who was impersonating Mister Graves. 

He hadn’t been looking for  Mister Graves, he’d seen him a few times before. Too afraid to approach him, what could he say? This time though he found it in him to approach the man. The closer he got the more nervous he became. Credence almost backs out, making too much noise as he does. Mister Graves had to of heard it. Panic rose in his chest. “M-Mister Graves?” Credence doesn’t know why he’s here, they weren’t the same man. 

Seeing Credence Barebone was the last thing he had expected in this dark alley. For a brief moment he thought his mind was playing tricks on him, that he was really losing it and should check himself into a hospital. But the more he blinked and Credence stayed, the more he realized that what he was seeing had to be real.

But if he was real, then how had he survived? He remembers reading the reports, he remembers Tina telling him that Credence had died.

“How are you real?”

[gravefate]

hcpscotched:

“My sister and Ma makes them, sir. I help pass them out. We have to makes sure the souls of Manhattan are aware of the threats hidden in plain sight,” Modesty replied, a hollow edge to her tone like a little thespian who lacked passion for the character they were playing. An accurate comparison indeed.

“And what sort of threat is that? Witches?” Percival raised an eyebrow, “If the threats are so grave and so scary, why are they hiding and not taking over?” He wonders if he’s actually trying to win a debate with a child, it seems ridiculous for him to do but he for some reason feels like it’s important.

[gravefate]

nomajbaker:

Jacob is wary, but he doesn’t let it show, not too much at least. “Yeah? Glad you think so. My Grandma ain’t here no more, but she’d be happy to hear ya say that.” Ringing up the receipt, he grabs the change and holds it out to the man, his Retail Smile in full effect, “Fifteen cents back,”

He was almost about to tell him to have a good evening, but he wasn’t making any movements to leave. “…you all right, buddy? You need anything else?” A genuine query, no malice or disdain in the tone, just genuine concern. As soon as the bakery’d opened, the evenings tended to attract a stranger crowd than even he’d seen in New York before. He didn’t mind, but it was happening too often to be mere coincidence.

Percival is hesitant to leave, he doesn’t really know why but the calming effect this place has on him is something he desires. He wants to stay just a little bit longer. This place gives him a sense of peace and serenity he hasn’t had in a long time.

He looks up when he realizes that the other man was speaking to him, “Sorry...mind sometimes wanders...” He smiles apologetically at the no-maj.

[gravefate]

modestybabebone:

Modesty rolled her eyes. “Why, because someone might hurt me? I’d welcome a new set of hands… and being abducted would be a positive miracle!” She asserted.

“Trust me, I’m fine… I’m far more likely to be hurt at home, and anyway… I can deal with pain. I’m an expert at it. I think you are the one who ought to be concerned.”

Percival finds himself surprised at the intensity of the girl’s words. Little kids shouldn’t have to think like that. They should be happy and innocent. They certainly shouldn’t wishing for someone to abduct them.

Unable to find the right words to reply, Percival settles for something else, “Why should I be concerned?”

[gravefate]

rvliance:

@gravefate | continued from here

It has to be some twisted nightmare,  some horrifying thing his mind has  made up. To see Mister Graves  covered in the blood, it almost  makes his stomach turn. You  could smell it in the air.     “M-Mister Graves…” He’s scared to get close,  worried about what will happen  if he does. Would he join the  bodies on the floor?      “Mister Graves…it’s Credence.” 

His head shot up at the name, his eyes widening at the figure he sees, the figure who was speaking.

“....Credence...”

A strangled cry leaves him as he falls to his knees. Dark eyes finally taking in his surroundings and another cry leaves his throat.

“No no no no....what did I do...no...no...”

Someone is very wrong with him. He’s not right. He’s broken. Why can’t he fix this? They will want to execute him now. He is a danger.

[gravefate]

grectergood:

        “ Mister Graves, ” He greets, a smile etched into his lips. The man was h a u n t i n g–Percival would FOREVER be haunted by Gellert, he was going to be sure of that, make it so nightmares would become REALITY once more. It was difficult, to leave–flee the country but have himself come back to the individual he had kept alive but tortured in every way he could. Percival Graves was just so obedient even if he had tried not to be. 

         Feet glide forward to stand before the dark-haired auror on his knees. A hand went to graze over the stubble upon his cheek, his worn hand having a soft linger, eyes looking down creating an even more dominant stance. “ I’ve missed you. ” He hummed the words not sat all endearing but PLAYFUL, as if coming back, visiting the auror once more was a GAME to him. A game of cat and mouse, to have the man chase after him. What Gellert made him endure surely changed the man and that was all he needed, to have a strong man fall weak before him, the D E V I L being more of a friend than G O D ever was.

His mind feels like two sides having a duel, screaming, fighting, yet the weaker side still won somehow. Where was his strength? Why has it faded? Why is it failing him now? Why is his weakness, his brokenness, why are those things taking over? He whimpers just at Grindelwald saying his name. What is wrong with him? Why has he become this frozen weak thing? Why can’t he be more than what Grindelwald had made him?

He’s shaking by the time Grindelwald’s hand finds its way to his cheek. His body betraying him as he closes his eyes and leans into the soft touch. His body had taken so much pain from Grindelwald that it desperately pleads for and treasures the soft touches.

“Please...”

But please what? Please don’t hurt him? Please be gentle with him? Please let him go? He truly doesn’t know anymore.

[gravefate]

briefcasewife:

“That’s not very convincing now is it?”

While the healers had done their job skillfully, he still had to recover what magic couldn’t fix. She caught his arm to steady his taller, but unstable frame. Tina pulled him back the few paces towards the hospital bed. “Although I’m surprised you’ve now demoted me from wand permits to babysitter. Just when I thought it couldn’t get lower you prove me wrong.”

No. It wasn’t very convincing and Percival silently cursed at his own failing body as he allowed Tina to lead him back to the hospital bed.

He made a face and looked away at her next words. He knows she’s likely joking but the words hit him harder than he had thought they would. Was he really that bad of a person that people did think of him that way? That people couldn’t tell the difference between him and a dark wizard hell bent on killing others?

“Am I...am I that bad?”

[gravefate]

attwatcr:

     She steps forward into his room, her arms folded across her chest. Marjorie wasn’t entirely sure why she cared so much about Percival after he was found; pity or perhaps empathy. Either way, she was here. “Is it so wrong to care?”

Percival was going to say he didn’t need people to care, but he stopped himself because how untrue would that be. He did want people to care, he wanted people to care enough to know he was replaced and impersonated, he wanted people to care enough to help him. But those words never left him too as he looked away and muttered, “A little late to care isn’t it...”

[gravefate]

mummysgotyou:

Newt blushed ever so slightly, ducking his head to avoid eye contact - he never felt too close to his brother (he was the one who achieved things, While Newt just bumbled through life at his own pace) so to know his brother talked fondly of his skills felt…nice.

“Just doing what I could Mr Graves. Besides, Tina always spoke HIGHLY of you, I couldn’t refuse to help a good man.” Or anyone really, but that wasn’t the point. He smiled somewhat awkwardly.

“You did a little more than that, Mr. Scamander, give yourself some credit. Not anyone would have done what you did.”

Percival knows this. Because not everyone would have been willing to go into the fray. Not everyone would have been willing to challenge a dark wizard as powerful as Grindelwald, even if they didn’t know it was him. There are more than plenty who would have refused to help a good man, he’s seen it in his line of work.

[gravefate]

piousboy:

Credence felt that slight trembling come back, the way his stomach fluttered whenever he was in contact with him, the only man who ever cared about him.

Except it wasn’t him. It was the body that he had been occupying at the time, but the man that looked at him now wasn’t the one that was whispering sweet words to him before. Such sweet, fake words.

Unsure of how the actual Percival would act around him, he closed his eyes, breathing out shakily as he felt the affectionate touch to his shoulder. Then those words - he was actually wanted here. His bottom lip shook briefly before he nodded, stepping forwards and leaning against Percival’s chest, his eyes closing. He would stay. He would stay forever if he could.

Percival closed his arms around Credence’s form without even thinking and holds the younger man close to him. Of all the things he had imagined, this had been the last. His mind had been drowned in darkness for so long that he hadn’t even considered that good things could happen.

But here, now. In this moment the world was showing him that good things could still happen. Because Credence Barebone is alive and whole. Because Credence Barebone is safe in his arms.

The younger man likely has no idea how much good just him being alive does to Percival. It’s like a light shining through all the darkness, a light finding him when he had believed all hope was lost. He could feel tears falling down his face as he continued to hold the other close. “You’re alive...you’re alive...I’m so glad you’re alive...” 

Words that he repeated like a mantra.