I hope you have a nice night. Goodnight Ashley, sleep well.
- 💚
Well, fuck. There goes my night.
BUT I won't be a total asshole. I saw your posts last night; don't even know how much sleep you got, but I bet it wasn't a lot. And with that final interview going on?!
Sigh... Fuck do you mean, I have to be reasonable now...? I don't want to be mature, I want to whine until you stick around and gimme attention...!!
...But fuck it. It's important, so I'm sucking it up. I'll be waiting on you, so I better hear news soon, hmm?
Literally the only "critique" I can give is my eyes failing me on the difference between "stained" and "strain," but. Honestly, that's whatever; I don't even have perfect eyesight anymore.
I'd imagine!! Lemme know how it goes first thing, huh?? Ugh, I hope they confirm it by the end... If they drag that crap on-
[general grumbles]
Damn right!! And no, you're not the only one. Though I am definitely gonna have to start remembering how it all works... Specifically, just "folding paper still works this way to fit it in the envelope, right?" And then what other trinkets I can weasel in, from there.
Heheh, riiiight~? Some mystery guest may show up. Wonder who it'd be, though...?
My, my, if only i could take a guess who it could be...?
And yeah, i'll let you know first thing. Hopefully he'll be able to make a decision before i leave and i can start working soon.
Nothing a little trial and error cant solve though, on the letter folding. you could just use a blank page as a tester until you got it down.
I do worry about how any trinkets would handle the travel. i havent anything by mail that way, that i can remember. and i know how other people handle strangers' mail so theres also that.
Haha is that the normal way relationships progress?
Can't wait to see what kind of memes you eventually roll out.
But yeah, being able to own up to your own mistakes is important as an adult, especially with kids. Its ridiculous how adults expect children to be as mature and developed as they are at any given point.
And you're right again Ashley. Some peoples' curses areother peoples blessings. Mom may have thought she had one hefty curse but she gave me one nice blessing. Its a bit ironic, considering that in the end she thought you were a curse to me too. Goes to show how much she knew.
An unhatched tar soul? Fuck whats up with the women of our family? I guess that means I got my anxiety and doormat nature from dad then...
I definitely wouldnt say broken. That would make the assumption that you (or me) are supposed to be like other people but... not everything is made to be the same, yknow? It takes just as much as the "bad" as there is "bad" to have balance. But yeah, if you don't acknowledge something theres no way to "fix" or work around it.
Pfft- youre right though, i bet the therapist had a hell of a time working with her. I bet the therapist needed their own therapist and pills just to deal with her, let alone any other patients.
She probably figured she'd get caught. If she was lucky theyd just institutionalize her for the rest of her life. If she wasnt well... i hope she's not picky about her women. Its kind of funny you call her way the coward's way. I think others would actually view it differently. Most people would agree that throwing away your "mistakes" is the cowards way. Either way she was fucked.
Though the insurance scam was absolute bullshit. For her that must have been a fucking god send.
Haha i appreciate your enthusiasm.
I managed to jot down a poem, if youre interested in a non-sexual read. Its the first i've made since forming so its definitely amateur hour over here. Our buddies have been on call since they got home so i've been helping them out with their game.
I don't think having more than one host is a bad thing personally, I normally don't host but, at least it seems to give the others hosts breaks. The memory problems are a bit of an issue we're still working around though.
Therapy...would probably helps us but we havent been since working nights. Not like anyone around here would see us. Already tried calling about it. Fucking shitty mental health care system.
Haha, i can be needy too yknow~? I'd probably complain yeah, but I'm sure I can find other things to keep me entertained. I could always post a whole bunch of nasty stuff until you come back. Maybe that'd keep you around.
Actually, I should post right before I leave for the con- three whole days of nothing but pre-written text posts while i'm offline suffering without my little sister.
Though I can't deny the thought of other people watching is tempting. It'd piss me off seeing anyone ogle you, but then I could always give them something more fun to watch. All they'd be able to do is watch in silence while you and I have all the fun.
I guess i'll have to up my game though, if youre willing to share so much, I should be just as willing to spoil my little sister, and give her something interesting to look through.
Haha right- only to find out after all the cheesy backstory and cliches that, in a sudden plot twist, you're a fucking kingpin, or some shit, playing the whole police force like a fiddle.
Hahaha well, i figured i could let a little information out. I mean, at this point it feels like theres not much of a reason to hide it anymore, right?
Besides, i can admit that back then i was gaslighting myself. I try to be a mature adult. As much as I wanted you I also did genuinely want to be normal. Unfortunately cant have both. But since we're where we're at may as well.
And my friend just loves pointing out all the little things I like to deny even to myself, so I had a pretty interesting conversation way earlier in the day. And I mean, if he can read me so easily, than whats the point? Lying won't do any good now.
And I figure being on the same page is probably the best way to continue what we've got going on so.
A BL...
i feel like i shouldnt be surprised.
Pfft- haha, are you only after the bones?
either way- cinnamon vanilla sounds like it would actually smell really good. I wouldn't mind wearing it. Better than the gross eucalyptus that's normally used for colognes.
"ass and alcohol"... i wish i had something to say about that.
What exactly isnt floozy behavior?
And yeah, an OF would allow you to work at your own pace, for the most part, especially if you had help. But yeah, retail fucking sucks. Part of me is tempted to go into sanitation but i hate cleaning. And i'm sure the chemicals would do more damage to my brain than dealing with customers.
Thats a good point though. It feels sexist though, and probably misogynistic, not being able to find work after engaging in any form of SW. I feel like if a man went from OF to retail, they'd comment on it but bury it, yknow? Not with a woman though.
The "if it worked out" is a pretty big "if" though. Those that succeed seem to do pretty well off, but those that dont... I mean you dont have to list it on a resume or application, so part of it is also on how well the employer digs into the applicant.
Neither of us ever got very lucky with our love lives but... to be fair it doesn't seem our parents did either haha. Or most people actually. However there was no way I was going to let some random dude stick his dick in my sister.
My poor little sister indeed. It'll work out, and you'll have nothing to worry about. There won't be any problems like there would be with other guys. 💚🩷
Hm, I didn't even think about custom stamps or seals. See, maybe more people should get into snail mail. Each one could be a new little treasure. A gift in the present and a memory in the future.
I definitely wouldnt say we have a shrine of anyone in particular thankfully, but the amount of faces in our room is unnerving to a point.
I'm not sure if id ever be able to date someone knowing they killed me though. Well, actually that could be kind of romantic depending on the circumstances.
But it seems like we can't get away from violence in our love. A few threats, a little pain, maybe a death or two (joking for any third parties), only help spice things up these days it feels like. Though we should probably steer clear of that this time around.
I mean...pretty sure!! Is that not what modern internet is all about~? I will say, beware the unhinged shit I'd probably end up sending. Lucky for me, the host loves memes/reaction memes, so I've got a huge repository to work with~!
But, ugh, yeah... Funny that I've never thought a huge amount on kids, but that's like...a no brainer, right? It feels like it, anyways. At the very least, I've taken the thought of, "If I ended up there, I'd be a better parent than her outta spite." Which is maybe a bizarre take from someone who's rather neutral on kids, but. I may yet end up around them. May as well plan out my strategy now...
Oh, she never realized what she put herself through. Not until (that) incident, I think, but even then, I don't think she realized how deep the pit was going to go?? "So it was their fault; how much worse could it be?" Surprise, ma!! Give it a few more years, and you'll realize some pret-ty interesting things about our relationship~
Heh!! Don't discredit yourself too hard... I always kinda figured we were from a similar cloth. When it comes to our nature, anyways; in body, duh. Siblings. But... You always gave me the impression of not being dissimilar; just someone who hides and hides. So... Unhatched tar soul? Hatching...? I'm not Entity; who's to say? But it feels close, like that.
Mmm, that's fair! It's just the best example when I don't feel like going for effort. You got it, though! So no worries~
Oh, absolutely. Like... Damn. I wonder who'd even be able to keep her... Every time I think on it, all I hear is, "I've been a saint, Ashley! A saint!" And it's like-?? She deflects that much to ME, and anyone would think she wouldn't do it to her own shrink?!? Fuuuck, no. Probably first recorded incident in history where a therapist needs to deny their patient further work; "We can't do anything here, please go," kinda stuff. I could see it.
I mean. You know what we've done. I would've seen it as sucky- but more respectable- if she had taken matters into her own hands. Wouldn't have been a long life, but for her to just-? Go for it like that? ...Alright, fair enough. Selling us off for some big ol' moneymaking machine that just starved us? I'm sure the money was good- the rest of the deal, too- but that's just cowardice, to me.
Heh, hey, I hinted at lewd just for the acknowledgement of the open possibility that you could write that...and I'd still wanna read it! SFW or not, I want to read... So gimme, gimme!!! Right into my eyes, please~!
Oh, I don't think so, either! I imagine it's a pretty great help... I just noticed that- pretty quickly- everyone else thought we couldn't do it. It's too taxing, no one would/could be able to carry that kind of burden, etc. And I get that...but I can do it. I've literally been through worse; I can handle it. Just... Watch out for the twist in personality, ahaha!! I'm definitely not the shrinking violet our main host is...
Ah, yeah. That's the way of it. We ended up in the same spot, where the therapist we have accepts sliding scale, but we...didn't take advantage of that when we probably should of. And no insurance. There's a sentiment of liking her best, but it's also like... She's not trained for systems, so it can be rough explaining what we're experiencing, and maybe how we'd want to adjust that situation to be. Meanwhile, someone else is using insurance, and it's been an uphill battle. Truly you pay more for being unassociated with a network, but fuuuuck... Feels more worth it.
...Geez~! You're spoiling me already and I would whine and say, "That's not fair," but... Actually, I'm going to 1000% enable you. You'd better!!! ♡ Mutual clinginess is gonna be the end of me and I don't mind it a bit~!
WAIT. Huh?!? Going away for 3. Whole. Days?! That's evil.... Eeeeevil... You better leave me things, then. And I'll pester you a ton, too. And if there's anything that's pink & green or reminds you of us or WHATEVER, I wanna see it, too!!!
It's admittedly funnier knowing I'd never notice a damn thing, but you've always seemed to have the eagle eyes. I'm too busy trying to cling, but then you've gotta get all possessive cause someone eyed me up and I didn't even notice... Degenerate~ On that note, don't change, cause that's the best. ♡
Oh, and as I've said before: You betterrrrr!!!! You're definitely about to see some stuff (my drafts still holding some personal favorites), and there'll yet be more. Catch tf up!! ♡!
....Wait, damn, that's perfect, actually... That's why all of my cases went squirrely!!!! >:O Figured out my own plans, holy shit! I really am the greatest detective who never lived.... Pfft-!
Hmm, that's fair! I clocked that about you sometimes, but then you'd act A Way and I'd end up back to confused. It's why I couldn't approach you for too much...if we're being honest~ Definitely why I hated Julia even more. Fake friend, trying to get at MY brother (I almost pulled the typo of a century there, GEEZ), and still treating me like the dirt on her shoes???? Honestly, she could go fuck off, and I'm glad she did.
Which... Ew, I get to unpack that now, since I should probably be respectable to any Julia fictives out there, but... A part of me is always going to be pissed/hold a grudge, I think. It's not fucking fair I get treated like less so that two-bit whore could have everything I wanted... 💢
Also. If you remember anything about the convo, I'm soooo nosy. Lemme know, if you want to!! (I certainly want to know how badly you got read like a book~!)
...If it's any reassurance, I didn't know 'til after? And our host had only seen him once elsewhere, so we both got a hilarious surprise looking into him!
Well... In that case, I'd be after one bone in particular, but. I expect you would've seen that kinda joke coming a mile away, right~? Heheh!!
Right?! And the fact of patchouli being in there... It's host's callout more than mine- a lot of their faves end up with the scent, for some reason or another- but. Fuck. ALSO, lilac, musk, leather AND raspberry?! Shut the fuck up. I've been drooling. It sounds perfect on those notes alone, cinnamon and vanilla included.
Heh. Yeah... Look, I self-admitted to walking face first into the first fictional guy who even slightly reminded me of you... It just kinda became more of a callout when his diet is- apparently- alcohol and cigs. Complete with needing others to goad him into eating. OH, and I think his mom was also shit?!
There's too many jokes I could make about Towa to choose even one to say out loud.
So... What isn't floozy behavior? Hmm. I guess folks- women in particular, of course- who'd mind their own damn business. They also can't be hotter than me, or I'm docking points. (Hit a limit, and you're getting referred to as floozy or hussy in my brain. Or both interchangeably. Depends on my mood/how bitter I am.) None of this "laugh louder at his jokes" crap, or "pay more attention to him" shit, either! If she's worth staring at, then that's a damn near insta-"floozy" title from me!!!
I also care less about random-ass strangers, but if they're in anyone's circle of someone I'm close to, and I don't like their shit? Better watch out~ (Cause my opinion [of them] will be dropping faster than a certain submarine...)
Mm, more or less. There's still notes from people who've done/are still doing OF, and it really is more of the self-made business stuff. Posting during good times, overthinking your backgrounds, invest in lighting... Blah, blah, blah. Too business-y!! Need to find a better way that's more flexible.
Sanitation... Yeah, that's a loaded one. Cleaning's good and all, but I gotta agree that the chemicals would very likely be something else. Can't stress that enough!
Oh, abso-fucking-lutely. I doubt men get asked that question at all, honestly. Maybe some jokes made in the workplace- "You ever do porn? You should!"- but anyone actually caring??? As if. Would probably just get you brownie points with the others. (And let's be honest: closeted men and nosy women wanting to know what the names were of your stuff, so they can go look it up.)
...Someone fem, on the other hand? Questions. If someone knows, you're fired. Some jobs will bar you from working with them outright. (That one news of a lady getting fired from her job 'cause some random, horny fuck ordering food noticed her.) Objectification out the damn wazoo. I might be calling bitches "hussies," but at least I'm not gonna fucking judge them for picking up the job that works. (Bonus laughter moment for every fuck who thinks that buying her content gives him a chance, when IRL she's rolling in cash with her boyfriend/husband/whoever. Like... Fuck, that's rich~)
Eh, that's true. I just think that- in a rare case- it's justified paranoia. Nothing like putting up a smooth front to get that job, only for some random customer pause and go, "Have we met before? You look/sound familiar." The final nail is if they do recognize you, or it clicks. Everyone's gotta brag about running into the sex-star (no matter how small) working the 9 to 5..... Like having a day job is weird!!
It's why that- if we did it- I agreed to doing face coverings. Don't know my face. Ideally, don't even know what my hair looks like: watch the show we're giving you, and mind ya business. (And then audio is peak, since we wouldn't have to worry about our face at all!)
Hmm, not that I wanted yours to work out, anyways... I mean, whaaat~? Hehehe!! But that said, it's just "some random dude," huh...? I wonder who could've passed your stern approval~?
Bet I know him~
Mm, true enough!! I certainly hope there wouldn't be... It'd sure make me sad, and that'd break both of our sweet, innocent, lil hearts, huh?
...That's so cheesy and I love it, haha! But see?! You get my vision! Stamps to decorate the page, or even add to the drawings/doodles we make? It'd work out perfectly! Like a charm, even. To match your adorable sentimentality. (As if I'm not the same, but whateverrrrr.)
There's gonna be a few, on my side. Sephiroth stares me down, but I remember hearing about...Handsome Jack? Uhh, some android people. I dunno; if it's not about my source, I'm half-listening.
I mean, for them, it sounded pretty damn romantic!! And I wouldn't usually say that, considering that living longer is kinda the goal, like... Wouldn't you want to be alive longer, together? Isn't that the whole fuckin' point?
...But it gets pretty damn romantically poetic when they're basically destined to be together, but also fate's giving them the middle finger. And he's got the drive to kill her, but doesn't want to. (He will.) He's also the only one who can/is allowed to kill her, because there's no other way it could go. Like, FUCK!!!! It's still not for me, but that's actually....sorta enviable. Souls entwined so much, even after that?? Fuck's sake. That's good.
Idk, friendship in progress is when you actually get a little jealous over cyclical deaths and reincarnation. Doomed lovers shit.
I mean. The jokes are probably fine... This website has said crazier shit and just gotten away with that. You know how many real crime scenes we've stumbled upon?? People will just post that. (And probably not last long as a blog, but. They sure do.) So. Consensual violence and Silly Jokes will get us far, I think.
...And yeah, no reliving source, but. I'm (mostly) good on that. Can still feel my natural diet leaning towards meat, though...so we'll stay with only the accessible stuff, huh?
I suppose it is. The host was never really one for memes, but his sense of humor is also kind of twisted. Can't see what you end up sending though. Not sure i'll be any good sending them back though. Guess i'll have to find another way to poke fun at you.
Yeah, kids are a lot of work. I havent thought about them personally. I don't think i'd be a bad parent per se, definitely nothing like ours but at the same time the thought of churning out kids that might grow into bad adults is kind of disgusting?
Right? I don't think it ever occurred to her that maybe that incident was a sign of how far the pit was. I mean, surely she was smart enough to know it wasn't completely accidental? Did she really just think a pair of kids accidentally killed someone and then instead of getting help they fucking hid the body? I can't believe she didn't notice something was off about our relationship sooner honestly. Don't get me wrong i'm glad she didn't, because who knows what she wouldve done, but at the same time i dont understand how someone can just... shrug their shoulders and move on after that?
You... might be right about that. Hiding was something I was really good at for a while. It felt necessary. Maybe thats how mom felt. But even if she did, she did a pretty piss poor job of hiding her own issues. Dad too. Though I probably did indulge a bit more than either of them ever thought to.
Fuck theres no way she wasn't like that with her therapist. She pushed so much of the blame onto you, theres no way she didn't bring that up to the therapist. I can imagine the therapist realizing why the two of us came out this way, fighting the urge not to tell mom just to keep themselves from having to deal with her wrath personally.
She basically starved us herself doing that shit. At least if she had gotten her hands dirty, it would've proved she had a spine. I agree, its definitely more respectable to do it yourself.
Haha, yeah, i'll make a post and tag you in it. Again, i'm pretty rusty but, i'm sure i've come up with worse. Part of me's worried if i make something lewd it'll cross a line. Which i guess is a weird thing to worry about all things considered. Still though, I don't want to cross a line or scare you off.
Oh, yeah, I get that. I'm still surprised our main host has any social media. He can hardly leave his own room at this point. As much as I don't want to deal with all the burdens, sometimes its better me than anyone else, yknow? And yeah, we've definitely been through worse. If you're ever getting irritated though, know i'm still in your corner cheering you on.
It's kind of telling though, when other's will pick on the newer alters about stuff like that. Especially the more aggressive ones. Because I know what kind of fits most of us have thrown after forming. It's pretty hypocritical to see them go after each other like that.
Right, I forgot we don't have insurance. None of our past therapists will see anyone with dissociative disorders period, which is our biggest problem aside from the general anxiety.
The mutual clinginess might kill us both but at least we'll deal with it together.
Honestly at this point we're probably enabling each other. Though for now I suppose there's no harm in indulging each other a bit. It'll be fun and comforting at the least <3
Haha, we still have a month before we leave, but yeah, the host and his friends are going to spending a weekend at a con, more than likely. Don't worry, i'll leave you plenty of stuff, and if i'm lucky, i'll have money to spend so i can get us some matching goodies.
I can always send you little check in reports too if you want?
A good morning text, letting you know any plans for the day, and a good night text telling you how much I miss my sweet sister. Or I can try at least, i've never hung around them face to face, so it's possible I won't be fronting.
Huh? Me? A degenerate? No~ impossible. It's not my fault the burden of protecting my sister's innocence is a heavy one. I gotta stay on my toes yknow? There are eyes everywhere if youre not careful/
I'm glad to know you like it, because it'd be pretty hard to stop now haha,
I'll try, I'll try. I dont want to be a creep for liking super old posts but it seems like you might enjoy my snooping. Which, if i didn't already say something, I have seen the post about changing and trying on outfits that keep getting sluttier. If that rings any bells. 💚
Hahaha the world's best detective. Wait, don't they normally have assistants or something? Or do you work solo?
(I have noticed a few of my own typos dont worry) yeahhh, it probably didn't help that Julia resembled you so much which was kind of on purpose. But hey, times were confusing back then. Maybe it's just since i've had time to think by myself, that i've cleared things up within myself? I did have a much worse tendency to overthink back then though.
I hadn't even thought about Julia fictives. To be fair I hadn't thought of anyone but you since forming. So there's definitely no need to be upset about it now. She doesn't have me anymore after all. And now I can give you more attention.
Haha- if you mean the phone call from yesterday, it was surprisingly normal. Our two systems have known each other for a long time, so they all pick up on most of us pretty quickly. Mostly he just wanted me to admit how i felt towards you. Sadistic as it is, it seems he likes hearing us admit things out loud. Which is funny, when i'm not on the receiving end of it.
Yeah, I expected that joke. Figured I'd give it to you.
Its a little reassuring, so i'll take it.
I've never really got into the whole scent stuff. The different notes and whatnot. I'd get something that I thought smelt nice that wouldn't choke me out and be done with it. Though I can't recall ever actually feeling the need to wear any fragrance outside of deodorant for the most part.
Fuck, that really is on the nose isn't it though. Funny how that works. Unfortunately when I formed the host had started getting into JJBA so theres been no pretty women to remind me of you. Just really buff, kinda flamboyant dudes.
But Ashley, could anyone match you in a competition of looks? Besides if i'm not looking around, I can't see who's staring at you. Also it's kind of hard for other people to make friends when they mind their own business.
I can't believe you made that joke- thats way fucking funnier than it needs to be
Man i wish the job market was so shitty. OF, retail, sanitation, food prep, all of it's torture.
Thats a good point though, if it were a man, he'd probably get brownie points for getting laid so often, completely forgetting that she was getting paid for it.
And youre definitely right. An old boss said the company would never hire a woman with that background. We were too shocked to even ask about men. Its just weird as all hell that thats where they draw the line. The company hires felons and recovering addicts but SW is too far? Bullshit.
And yeah, people that delude themselves into thinking that their parasocial relationship is real and has substance is almost pitiful, if the people doing it weren't also so disgusting in how they treat others and shit.
Youd think that the people who clock it would just note it to themselves in their heads and go "oh wow- neat" instead of making it into a whole ordeal.
I've heard of people wearing masks that hide both their hair and face for that kind of work to protect themselves, so surely it wouldnt be too far out of the ordinary. I mean tiktok has an entire community to masks too.
I almost didnt see the "bet I know him" and almost went on a whole tirade about dudes not being able to date you and why
You're right though, there's only one person that has my approval. Myself. And that's only just barely. I do still feel some guilt over some of the thoughts and feelings I have for my own sister. But i'll get over it.
And we definitely wouldn't want anymore heartbreak, now would we? Besides, a good brother will always make sure his sister is happy and taken care of. So our hearts will be well taken care of.
It is cheesy isnt it? But i'm glad we're on the same page with it- I was also thinking about sending little doodles and poems, decorating the pages and envelopes...man we really are romantics aren't we? And what can I say, as a poet sentimentality and charm is what i'm supposed to be about, right?
Eh I know a little bit about most of who's here. Mostly because we tend to absorb all of our host's memories until we're pretty used to things. The more we front, the more trouble we have with sharing our memories. Unfortunately it doesn't work the same way for him. He just kind of forgets everything unless he's completely by himself.
Right? But at the same time, like imagine we hadn't escaped. The cultist dude didn't die and we didnt eat him. Wouldn't it have been romantic of me to kill myself, or be killed, so that you could eat and continue living? The last of my life given up, to sustain you, and give you a chance to continue living?
That is pretty good. fates intertwined into one, with only fate giving them the finger. And yeah, it's even better when you add reincarnation into that. Over and over, meeting and loving only to be ripped apart? Never remembering but feeling it as the lifetimes continue? Fuck, doomed love can be so all consuming.
Hopefully you're right. I know at some point someone was posting about collecting humans bones from a flooded graveyard and I think selling them, so... i'd hope we're in the clear.
Yes, only the accessible stuff. Pork and beef are supposed to taste the most similarly to humans from what i've read, so as long as we eat plenty of red meats we shouldn't be wanting actual humans. In theory.
“Pass out in between loads,” he says… Heheh!! You really just said that one, huh~? It’s okay, I’ll be sure to tease you lots for THAT lil slip up.
Kind of awake now, but still so tired… I’ll be back on soon enough; just need to pester you directly. Cause I need to, first thing. Duh~!
~🩷
Haha damnit
thats what i get for not sleeping right.
I guess i'll have to be more careful in the future. though it might be fun giving you material to work with.
I was wondering when i was gonna hear from you. Oddly enough i feel the need to do the same thing when i wake up. Gotta make sure my little sister gets her attention~
ashley whispering shit like "you love your sister" into andrews ear while he sleeps while he is 100% just pretending to be asleep and is just enjoying the show
Oh, I'll use the information to the best of my abilities.
I'd give it less than a week though, depending on how much trouble we decide to get up to. If we go to a store we dont like or with exceptionally rude employees we could probably give them one hell of a story to tell.
You've got a good point though. Well actually, if you know the right areas to hang around in, it wouldnt be too hard. Theres a girl about two hours north of here that was fucking loaded. Though she was hell to be around from what I hear.
Unfortunately most of the trees here are evergreens, so no, no pretty colors. Even in the dead of winter, it doesnt get too cold over here during the days. A crisp 50 or 60 maybe during the day. It normally doesnt snow until like January over here, sometimes.
there are even days in the winter when its nice to sit at the creek. not swim in it, but to just relax away from everything.
Haha, i'm sure you can find other ways to tease me Ashley.
Yeah because nothing could go wrong sharing a twin sized bed. if either of us fell off we'd damn near hit the fridge.
You're right it would be cool, but unfortunate you would not be the first stranger they'd have randomly show up in they're home. If we did it again they'd throw a huge fit over it. They're actually pretty boring people.
What can I say?
in all aspects we really do seem made for each other, like our bunnies. Youre right though, we can't sink until we can sink together. For better or for worse, right?
Thats a good point though, I figured i'd end up sleeping with the bunnies since i have nothing else to cling to since *someone* can't teleport, but I probably should find a shelf to put them on when i'm not around. Shit, I'd have to rearrange the room again. It's still not in order from the last time. I guess I could hang a shelf over our desk...
HAH, that's so true... We'd give 'em hell, but I'd like to think it'd be fun for everyone involved. We get to cause some chaos, they get a crazy-ass story to tell! Is it really a lose, no matter what we get up to~?
Ugh, yeah... There's the downside: actually weaseling your way in. Never can be easy!! Even though WE absolutely would deserve it more... Oh well.
Awh, damn! Evergreens aren't terrible, though, so I'll take it. See too much of 'em here, but I think a forest of them could fix me. A little bit. (Oh gee, the Ashley fictive likes lots of green...!! Who woulda guessed?) And I'd wait for snow!!! It doesn't snow here basically at all, so even if it's a wait, I'd take it.
Creek's gotta be nice in winter. Way too cold to touch if it persists, but... Hey, great view! And sound.
You're right, though. I would. And will.
...Challenge accepted. I mean, I rotate like crazy and tend to escape blankets, but-! Who knows. Maybe one of us will avoid that fate. Maybe.
...1 2 3, NOT IT!!! >:3
........I'm not even the first one?!? UGH!!! The world's too damn cruel...
...You are right, though. Just like I was~! Little magnets in our hands and everything. So while I'm still kicking...you're stuck doing the same! Especially since this damn system wants to better me, for whatever reason. Stuck with me until the end, just like before!
See?! Told you! I told you~!! So now you have some silly little goals to achieve. And if it really makes you feel better about it...then tell yourself I commanded you to do it~! So there's no avoiding it!!!
Haha, depending on who's working that day, it could be a loss. I know some places are probably used to more chaotic behavior. We could probably get up to some fun in a movie theater but they also probably deal with that more than like, a bookstore would, for example.
To be fair most people don't get what they deserve. Both in terms of luck and wealth, and punishment.
If you need a forest, we definitely have forests. Now I wish it was actually colder out so I could show you. Fuck, I forgot they're supposed to be expanding the highway over here soon, so i'm not sure how long it'll last.
Man it's going to be hell when they start expanding. Hopefully it takes them another year or two to get everything ready. I want to enjoy it for at least another season or two.
The sunsets over here make the sky a really pretty pink- sometimes it tints everything a reddish-orange. We can't have one color without the other, and I hate to admit I find myself upset at the lack of pink in my life.
It'd snow enough to lock us in the house for a week and then be gone. But it'd give us the chance to have a snowball fight at least.
I've never seen the creek frozen though. But I never got around to looking during the snows, since we were trapped.
I sleep like a rock, no tossing and turning for me.
But if waking up on the floor became a regular occurrence I could just start sleeping on the floor. I could face the mice and snakes through the winter and summer so my dear little sister could have the bed.
Though I'd probably sneak up onto the bed anyway. Maybe if you were the little spoon you wouldn't toss and turn so much?
I haven't brought home any strangers, but I know the host has a few years ago. I dunno maybe its been long enough that they've forgotten about it? We could always try our luck~
Hahaha, you're right though. I can't possibly entertain the thought of having my little sister over for a visit if my bedroom looks like a tornado tore through it, regardless of how unlikely a visit is.
Stuck with you through and through, from now til forevermore. Kicking until there's no more fight left to give.
Thats a good point though, our system seems pretty insistent on improvement as well. And if one of us has to do better, it pretty much forces the other to do the same, doesn't it?
Booo, I miss you already. I’m supposed to be dragging our ass to bed, but I wanna drag my feet until I see you reply or something…
Ugh. The distance is already getting to me, I guess. Knew it wasn’t gonna be a slow process, but still. Clingy Ashley in full effect; deal with it.
If you’re asleep, you better have good dreams, or else! (Or else what? Dunno. Didn’t think that far ahead. Can’t exactly fight your dreams, after all.)
~🩷
Sorry about that Ashley, i completely conked out. it ended up being pretty hard to stay awake on my own after everyone went and did their own thing.
Youre right though the distance does suck- on the bright side clingy Ashley is more than welcome to be clingy.
I didnt dream but there was still no nightmares, so hopefully thats a win?
Alright, I'm gonna give your inbox a break, and a chance to ramble as much as our silly lil hearts desire~! This'd probably be a better format, anyways.
Snooper extreme, that woman. If she got a crumb of something- even if her brain practically made it up- she HAD to start digging to either confirm or deny whatever it invented. And sometimes, she wouldn't even be fully satisfied by anything said until SHE decided the matter was over???
Ugggghhh, she could be the worst. Usually was, but we mutually hated each other after a certain point, so it didn't matter the details.
As for my back... Heh, either works, right~? Ugh, especially for her suspicious ass... If we got touchy, she'd be staring at it like she wanted to burn your hands off. Or that I'd burst into flame. Whichever. She invented her own problems, created the rest.
Eh, you were apparently unplanned... And I've been wondering- in retrospect- if we only owe our existence to the fact she didn't want to be further demonized by being the woman who got an abortion? I doubt she would've ever admitted that, but some things started lining up when I thought about it like that. Damned if you do, damned if you don't kinda deal.
Hell yeah!! I want to see your writing, anyhow.
As for host... Eugh. Talk about complicated! On one hand, it's kinda neat. No one else really has this role, except...well, the "main" host. One of the others almost tried, but she couldn't keep up, and periodically has to remove herself to rest up before coming back. I'm the only one good at consistency... I guess the only downside is people would have to see how damn needy I can be, which.... It's a lot. I'll admit it!!!!
Oh yeah, the adventures were the best~! Even the devious ones. But I'm kinda proud of my own schemes, of course.
Exactly!!! I'll give the world this, though: most get a fair shake at...existing, for lack of a better term. The second there's a problem in my bubble?? Hussy. Floozy!!! Get the fuck away!!
OH, OH!! And now that I made this into a post-!! Holy FUCK, I can show you the guy?!?
I'm literally thinking of getting this dumbass figure cause- aside from the blonde tips and scars- he reminds me of you SO MUCH, it's not even fair... He even kills people and paints about it. :c I feel like I'm trying adopt a damn dog. (AND he has a perfume... I was getting ready to start projecting hardcore, not gonna lie.)
I often think about videos I've seen where a woman is like, "Some guy asked me to look at/take pictures of my feet for $20..." and their hand would come up, holding that bill. And I won't lie... The old mindset sticks: money's money, and I don't care that much. If it's showing stuff off, making audios? Yeah, that's fine, honestly.
There was even a "menu" made of stuff we own, so potential costumers could make requests. (And the thought I agree on: if a specific donation means we can get new clothes/items, they get special treatment. First pictures. The first one to see, with audio thanking them personally. Etc.) It was REALLY thought out, if you couldn't tell, ahaha!
Heh, riiight~? It's just....soooo funny how those problems solved themselves. So weird, too, tho!! Not even talking to me after... But I know that my sweet, very normal big brother wouldn't have been mean to them, huh? He was veeerrrryyy busy being normal with his whore of a girlfriend. ♡ And so (thrilling) sad it is that she's gone, now. Oh, well~!! ♡
You've got better, now. 🩷 No more confusing (bullshit) stuff, huh~? Heheh!!!
Hmm, anyways!
Same! I don't...think anyone's done snail mail, actually. Kind of a dying art, that one. OH, and as for stamps-!! I meant to talk about the rubber stamps, not the postage ones. There was a period of time where stamp collecting was it and there used to be cute ones, from what I understand. There's only one or two lying around now, but... An ink pad and a trip to a store would round that out!
...And I think the only thing we collect is figures. Anything games/anime. Most overlapping with sources, cause "the hyperfixation will do that to ya."
youre probably right about the format. hopefully this'll be a little bit better for talking. Though I guess we could always DM each other too. But this way others know that we're talking with each other.
And yeah she was a pretty piss poor mother all things considered. Though I guess i'm not in any real place to judge, i've never had kids. I still can't wrap my head around the fact that she thought having a second child would be a good idea. I'm glad she had you though. Now she can regret having both of us while we rub it in her metaphorical face.
Do you think she was ever seeing a therapist? I mean, how do you even talk to someone about that in a medical or legal setting? "Hey I'm real stressed out because I think my kids are fucking each other? Would popping a few Xanax help or?"
Honestly I wondered if she ever thought about killing us herself, she sure did look pissed enough about it whenever she caught us in the same bed or cuddling on the couch.
But yeah, sometimes every path is going to screw you over. She just lucked out in that aspect.
I'll definitely try writing something for you once I'm done metaphorically babysitting on my end.
The main host does that too. He'll end up getting "locked away" for like a week or two and come back peachy without a care in the world. But hey, at least we can be needy online and make it other peoples problems. Or each other's I suppose. Though it is amusing seeing some of the stuff you've reblogged. To be fair I haven't gone out of my way to snoop but now i'm curious about what else you've got under the midnight tag.
Youve always been pretty clever to say the least. You would've gone far if you went to any schooling for detective work. But I guess that's not as fun as actually getting away with things, is it?
Haha, are you sure its a fair chance? Though I guess at this point you're giving others more of a chance than I am.
I hate to say I can see why he reminds you of me. But what's he from? As much anime as the host has seen, I don't recognize him. Though I guess the host is more into cartoons than actual anime. A perfume too though? I wonder what its supposed to smell like.
I know people have told the host he should do stuff like that, OF or selling pictures but I think it was moreso that his coworkers wanted to be able to see it. Which none of us would've allowed.
Though you're right, money's money and times are rough out here. Makes you wonder how long you could milk it for. And yeah I agree with that, if a customer pays for the outfit they get special pictures and to see it first. it only makes sense. Its a pretty good business incentive too.
And I guess you're just lucky like that. All your problems *solved* before they could fester and spread like diseased flowers. And you're right with all my time being normal, doing absolutely normal things with my girlfriend I couldn't possibly have had the time to remove get to know any of the guys trying to fuck my sister. It so unfortunate that none of my girlfriends lasted. It was really a relief disaster when they kept leaving. If only my nosy little sister had just left things alone, instead of harassing them constantly in her jealous state. But we're here now and neither of us have to worry about it, since we've had the time to straighten out our own issues, agreed?
No more confusing stuff. Just us two. 💚🩷
Oh! rubber stamps, I completely forgot those were a thing. And you're right, snail mail definitely isn't done anymore. I think that's what would make it even more fun though. Letters can be personalized in a way that a text, email, or call cant be. I know the host had bought wax seal stuff too, now I just have to get the right colors for the wax.
We have a few figures, but not many. He has a fixation on the tmnt turtles so we have a good amount of stuff from that too, but he mostly collects cartoons.
Truly, it's like watching a relationship- of any kind- start out. First, you menace the dashboard. Before you know it, it's the 2 AM meme posts in DMs! Normal progression steps, you know.
Hey, neither have I, and I probably would've figured out how to do it better than she did. At the very least, letting them know I was a shit mom doing her best, and not merely shrugging my shoulders with a, "If you were a better kid, this wouldn't be happening." Ma'am!!! That's a CHILD you're speaking to!
Her excuse for another was just as unhinged, but... Whatever. I was there, am here, and fuck it. I'll happily be living on to be mom's greatest mistake. ♡ (Which, contrary to that, makes me your gift! Funny how that works, huh?)
Definitely not. Would it have fixed her? ...Also not; according to Entity, she was an unhatched tar soul, so... I guess that says more about her than I could've. Not enough therapy to fix that, just like how I figure it wouldn't do much for me, specifically. If someone's "broken" but refuses to look at it or doesn't feel that way, what can you do, right?
...I still would've paid some hard cash indeed to see a therapist's face when she admits THAT number, however!! Don't think the medication's gonna fix that one~
That does tie back to the tar soul thing, though! Between her own issues and probably wishing she had the bravery to see it through... There's no way she didn't think about giving it a go. Fixing it all, starting over... Right? Nah. Instead, she took the coward's way out and did a life insurance scam. Go figure!!!
Fuck yeah!!! Impatiently waiting, then! No matter what, I wanna read that shit!
Yeah? Guess it's something that just hasn't hit me then... I figure if this remains a constant by Wednesday- our own therapy appointment time, ironically enough- it's probably going to end up as a second host situation, though... That said, both!!! Everyone else for having to watch and witness, and each other for the rest~! Not like you'd be complaining, I'd bet. I think you'd complain more if I took a break or got too busy, I bet~
Anyways, I fully recommend snooping!!! This blog is basically Me City, so I expect it to be eventually filled with all sorts of random crap for me to look back on. Gotta be willing to share that with my big brother too, right~? Heheh!
And to be fair, detective work is law. I don't give much of a hoot over all that crap; if I was, I'd have to be one of those "ex-detectives, [x] years off the force for misconduct.....but always hired back for her excellent eye!" Something really cheesy like that~
...First time I read, it didn't quite sink in. Now that it has...!! Ugggghhh, you're so terrible~!! It's the greatest, though. Look at yoooouuu, watching your sis do her best to improve and basically whining, "Nooo, stay the same! They are hussies, and you're sooooo smart!!!"
Hey, I'm hearing the goal's been set, and there's no deviances, though. Who am I to complain~?
Right?! I saw him and literally GASPED... Idc what's going on with any of his canon stuff; I'm projecting and proud of it! No shame! Anyways-! That's where things get funnier, cause... He's Towa, from Slow Damage. A BL (boy's love) game. That's why I'm skipping the meat, and eyeing up the bones! (Wow, imagine that...)
As for his perfume, here's the details! I've seen a place that recreates perfumes, so I'm SO beyond tempted to try them out and get them to recreate it. If it gets the seal of approval from me... Well~
Damn... Almost lost track of it. Thankfully, had it saved on Discord~! So yeah, uh. Very normal about it. (Even though, with the context of this being Towa's, PLENTY of people have joked it shouldn't smell this good. It should smell, "like ass and alcohol.")
Eugh. Yeah, encouragement from friends is one thing, but sniffing around for fucking perverted-ass content... See, THAT'S the shit I'm on about. Loser floozy behavior. Whores, even!! They can go fuck off.
Yeah, exactly!! And it's not exactly like we're equipped to handle...anything else. At least something like OF, it's a job we can manage. What, at worse, we hand off for someone else to manage behind the scenes? It's possible, if with the potential of being annoying. Beats retail, I tell you what.
Ah, right. Real negative being some folks will ask about your history- make sure you haven't done that kinda content in the past- and turn it into a Thing that makes you pretty much unable to be hired. More crap, but it's the thought of...if it worked out, maybe we wouldn't have to care? Hmm.
Anyways... Gosh, right?!? Such a troubled love life we lead... I couldn't even have a boyfriend long enough to lose my innocence~! Oh well. Guess your poor lil sis will have to figure that out in time...but-! With such a wonderful big brother looking out for me, I'm sure things will work out in time, riiight~? And gee-! It sure means I can be well-adjusted and at ease.
Hmm, just us, indeed~ 🩷💚
Uh-huh!! Shit, there's custom stamps and such, too... Dunno if I'd get that crazy, but you know me!! I'd consider it, at least~ And wax seals!!!! That'd be WAY too cool! If they're glittery, that'd be a bonus, for sure~
I am literally sitting next to a mini-shrine of Sephiroth. One of the others...she dated him in source? Or something? Sounded complicated, considering he killed her. But-! What's a little romance without some stabbing, huh? I stand by that.
Haha is that the normal way relationships progress?
Can't wait to see what kind of memes you eventually roll out.
But yeah, being able to own up to your own mistakes is important as an adult, especially with kids. Its ridiculous how adults expect children to be as mature and developed as they are at any given point.
And you're right again Ashley. Some peoples' curses areother peoples blessings. Mom may have thought she had one hefty curse but she gave me one nice blessing. Its a bit ironic, considering that in the end she thought you were a curse to me too. Goes to show how much she knew.
An unhatched tar soul? Fuck whats up with the women of our family? I guess that means I got my anxiety and doormat nature from dad then...
I definitely wouldnt say broken. That would make the assumption that you (or me) are supposed to be like other people but... not everything is made to be the same, yknow? It takes just as much as the "bad" as there is "bad" to have balance. But yeah, if you don't acknowledge something theres no way to "fix" or work around it.
Pfft- youre right though, i bet the therapist had a hell of a time working with her. I bet the therapist needed their own therapist and pills just to deal with her, let alone any other patients.
She probably figured she'd get caught. If she was lucky theyd just institutionalize her for the rest of her life. If she wasnt well... i hope she's not picky about her women. Its kind of funny you call her way the coward's way. I think others would actually view it differently. Most people would agree that throwing away your "mistakes" is the cowards way. Either way she was fucked.
Though the insurance scam was absolute bullshit. For her that must have been a fucking god send.
Haha i appreciate your enthusiasm.
I managed to jot down a poem, if youre interested in a non-sexual read. Its the first i've made since forming so its definitely amateur hour over here. Our buddies have been on call since they got home so i've been helping them out with their game.
I don't think having more than one host is a bad thing personally, I normally don't host but, at least it seems to give the others hosts breaks. The memory problems are a bit of an issue we're still working around though.
Therapy...would probably helps us but we havent been since working nights. Not like anyone around here would see us. Already tried calling about it. Fucking shitty mental health care system.
Haha, i can be needy too yknow~? I'd probably complain yeah, but I'm sure I can find other things to keep me entertained. I could always post a whole bunch of nasty stuff until you come back. Maybe that'd keep you around.
Actually, I should post right before I leave for the con- three whole days of nothing but pre-written text posts while i'm offline suffering without my little sister.
Though I can't deny the thought of other people watching is tempting. It'd piss me off seeing anyone ogle you, but then I could always give them something more fun to watch. All they'd be able to do is watch in silence while you and I have all the fun.
I guess i'll have to up my game though, if youre willing to share so much, I should be just as willing to spoil my little sister, and give her something interesting to look through.
Haha right- only to find out after all the cheesy backstory and cliches that, in a sudden plot twist, you're a fucking kingpin, or some shit, playing the whole police force like a fiddle.
Hahaha well, i figured i could let a little information out. I mean, at this point it feels like theres not much of a reason to hide it anymore, right?
Besides, i can admit that back then i was gaslighting myself. I try to be a mature adult. As much as I wanted you I also did genuinely want to be normal. Unfortunately cant have both. But since we're where we're at may as well.
And my friend just loves pointing out all the little things I like to deny even to myself, so I had a pretty interesting conversation way earlier in the day. And I mean, if he can read me so easily, than whats the point? Lying won't do any good now.
And I figure being on the same page is probably the best way to continue what we've got going on so.
A BL...
i feel like i shouldnt be surprised.
Pfft- haha, are you only after the bones?
either way- cinnamon vanilla sounds like it would actually smell really good. I wouldn't mind wearing it. Better than the gross eucalyptus that's normally used for colognes.
"ass and alcohol"... i wish i had something to say about that.
What exactly isnt floozy behavior?
And yeah, an OF would allow you to work at your own pace, for the most part, especially if you had help. But yeah, retail fucking sucks. Part of me is tempted to go into sanitation but i hate cleaning. And i'm sure the chemicals would do more damage to my brain than dealing with customers.
Thats a good point though. It feels sexist though, and probably misogynistic, not being able to find work after engaging in any form of SW. I feel like if a man went from OF to retail, they'd comment on it but bury it, yknow? Not with a woman though.
The "if it worked out" is a pretty big "if" though. Those that succeed seem to do pretty well off, but those that dont... I mean you dont have to list it on a resume or application, so part of it is also on how well the employer digs into the applicant.
Neither of us ever got very lucky with our love lives but... to be fair it doesn't seem our parents did either haha. Or most people actually. However there was no way I was going to let some random dude stick his dick in my sister.
My poor little sister indeed. It'll work out, and you'll have nothing to worry about. There won't be any problems like there would be with other guys. 💚🩷
Hm, I didn't even think about custom stamps or seals. See, maybe more people should get into snail mail. Each one could be a new little treasure. A gift in the present and a memory in the future.
I definitely wouldnt say we have a shrine of anyone in particular thankfully, but the amount of faces in our room is unnerving to a point.
I'm not sure if id ever be able to date someone knowing they killed me though. Well, actually that could be kind of romantic depending on the circumstances.
But it seems like we can't get away from violence in our love. A few threats, a little pain, maybe a death or two (joking for any third parties), only help spice things up these days it feels like. Though we should probably steer clear of that this time around.
