better off ted (season one) sentence starters
❝ you have to lighten up. ❞
❝ it becomes normal if you keep doing it. everything does. ❞
❝ do you think i don’t fight injustice enough? ❞
❝ i see where this is going. ❞
❝ i would never leave you— ever. ❞
❝ why are you being so mean? ❞
❝ all i ask is for your respect. ❞
❝ look, i’m not gonna play the blame game with you. ❞
❝ have you been avoiding me since… you know, you held my hand? ❞
❝ i think you and i should have sex. ❞
❝ don’t change the subject. ❞
❝ i didn’t think you knew my name. ❞
❝ i don’t see the appeal, but whatever. ❞
❝ i never get tired of hearing that story. ❞
❝ wow. that was super aggressive. ❞
❝ they’re going to catch you. ❞
❝ i like the way you say my name. ❞
❝ well, joke’s on me. i’m not a hero. ❞
❝ what is a hero, anyway? ❞
❝ sometimes it’s better not to think about things. ❞
❝ okay, fine. maybe sometimes i’m a little bossy. ❞
❝ kids. god’s little awkward moment machines. ❞
❝ do you have a problem with that? ❞
❝ i’m bad at metaphors, but i’m great at sex. ❞
❝ have i ever failed at anything? no. ❞
❝ come over here so i can see that you’re alright. ❞
❝ okay. i think i see the problem here. ❞
❝ just pull yourself together. ❞
❝ don’t ever hesitate, sweetheart. you’re either in or you’re out. ❞
❝ what if this is the last thing i ever do? ❞
❝ you ever just wanna run away? ❞
❝ actually, the kiss was a bit awkward. ❞
❝ i’m sorry i’m not the alpha male you are. ❞
❝ it gets dark whenever you leave the room. ❞
❝ you’re still hung up on her, aren’t you? ❞
❝ you have to stand up for yourself this time. ❞
❝ she is way too attractive and intimidating to face alone. ❞
❝ i understand what you’re going through. ❞
❝ i’m really angry about this. or just angry. you know, whatever feels right to you. ❞
❝ you won. nice work. you can walk away tall. ❞
❝ i’m different than other women. and by ‘different,’ i mean better. ❞
❝ i’m having the most awful, awful, awful day. ❞
❝ i don’t think this is a good idea. ❞
❝ i’ve been doing some reading. we’re on the wrong side of this issue. ❞
❝ it’s always about money. ❞
❝ did you ever stop to think that maybe you’re the insanely competitive one? ❞
❝ it’s not my fault i don’t listen when you talk. ❞
❝ the everything bagel. it’s all you could ever want, in one bagel. ❞
❝ why don’t you shut up and stop trying to analyze me? ❞
❝ your calves are like granite wrapped in silk. ❞
❝ there’s something i hoped i’d never have to tell you. ❞
❝ oh, good. you’re still awake. ❞
❝ there’s a penny in this cookie… ❞
❝ i know you’re in there. i can hear you crying. ❞
❝ turns out just because you write your name on something, doesn’t mean you get to keep it. ❞
❝ there’s a three percent chance we could end up in jail. ❞
❝ are you propositioning me? ❞
❝ you’re obsessed with me. i like that about you. ❞
❝ everyone in this place is nuts. ❞
❝ i should endure this. i mean, suffer through— i mean, support you. because that’s what friends do. ❞
❝ why are you telling me all of this? ❞
❝ it feels good to finally admit that to someone. ❞
❝ no hard feelings, huh? ❞
❝ i once slept with my boyfriend’s therapist to find out if he was cheating on me. he wasn’t. ❞
❝ i don’t know how much more i can take. ❞
❝ i owe you an apology. ❞
❝ you’re a baby. you know that? a big baby. ❞
❝ don’t think you can buy your way out of this with doughnuts. ❞
❝ i hate seeing you put out like this. ❞
❝ can i move in with you? ❞
❝ it’s cute that you’re trying so hard to impress me. ❞
❝ there are more of us than there are of you, so statistically, you’re the exotic one. ❞
❝ i can’t have you flinching every time i shoot a gun in here. ❞
❝ it’s a little cat and mouse game we play, instead of having a normal healthy relationship. ❞
❝ i’m sorry. does your obvious pain make that an insensitive thing to say? ❞
❝ my father once got kicked out of a zoo for giving a monkey a cigarette. ❞
❝ it’s a disaster. a debacle. a disastercle. ❞
❝ and the crowd goes wild! ❞
❝ i don’t even know if i want to win. ❞
❝ so… the student becomes the master. ❞
❝ we are not mad scientists, regardless of what our bowling shirts might say. ❞
❝ you came here to call a truce? ❞
❝ i know it’s not my place to say anything, but… what is wrong with you? ❞
❝ is it terrified in here, or is it just me? ❞
❝ am i a horrible person? ❞
❝ i guess if you force me to define the relationship… ❞
❝ are you guys fighting or having sex? ❞
❝ you owe me a smoothie. ❞
❝ i wish i had the power to make everyone go away. ❞
❝ i give up. i gotta tell you the truth. ❞
❝ i hated what i was turning into. ❞
❝ all right, let’s not panic. ❞
❝ i love being applauded. ❞
❝ don’t ever lie to me again. ❞