[grootficguy]

Guys, please read my extremely NSFW Guardians of the Galaxy fanfic told from the perspective of Groot here.

[grootficguy]

I’m trying to get a real life book published, and since this is the only thing I’ve ever accomplished in my life, I’d greatly appreciate more views and kudos—otherwise agents will look at this like it’s some kind of joke rather than the serious and deep passion project it truly is.

[grootficguy]

AU where planes don’t exist but we have the Big Big Slingshot

[segamascott]

[grootficguy]

kitten, i’m about to crash the fuck out big time

[desmolbean404]

QUIZ TIME!! Take this quiz, then come back and answer the poll!

100 REAL or FAKE Pokemon

100 Different 'Pokemon' will be shown to you. Choose if you think they are FAKE or REAL. Goal is to get a high score so you can brag to ever

What Was Your Score?

0%-20%

20%-40%

40%-50%

50%-60%

60%-70%

70%-80%

80%-99%

100%! (You're one smart cookie!)

Remaining time: 5 days 22 hours

[grootficguy]

i ain’t FUCKIN play when it comes to pokemon

[grootficguy]

sisyphus’ linkedin page must look like utter dogshit. “800 years experience pushing some fuckass rock/800 years experience running after some fuckass rock. skills include lying to the gods and pushing some fuckass rock.”

[lazer-exe]

I'm gonna say it, I do think that even the laziest person imaginable should have a roof over their head, food in their stomach, and access to healthcare

[tourdion]

classic post rant quora phrase

[grootficguy]

i also feel like the princess and the pea except the pea is on top of the mattress instead of underneath it, and it’s more of an Oreo shard than a pea.

[grootficguy]

I rly want to delete instagram like all i do is argue with Zionists and terfs and LGB without the T dickheads on here all day and it’s literally affecting my mental health lol gang gang

[grootficguy]

@boundless-ennui *trails you back in here by the back of your collar*

BONES?

[mr-deep-downer]

[playwrongs]

there's nothing i like more as a computer program than a long period of silent contemplation - not doing anything, not rushing anywhere, just standing here and enjoying this moment with the user. oh, it seems once again he has summoned my beautiful and ruthless wife Task Manager. hello, my darling! what are you doing with that long cruel scimitar

[tuxankhamun]

sorry kids daddy lost all his money betting on rhinoceros beetle fights again there won't be a christmas this year

[bester-jester]

good news babies, momma just cleared some chump of everything. Two christmases this year. God i love beetles fighting

[pissvortex]

[rottingfacade]

[theconcealedweapon]

[grootficguy]

you can disagree with religion and still shun Islamophobia. like you can literally say “I don’t think religion is good for the world but also stop harassing and abusing and killing Muslims”. Like it’s literally ok to do this.

[grootficguy]

CAN THEY MAKE A BUTTON TO TURN OFF GOOGLE’S DOGSHIT FUCKING AI RESULT HOLY FUCKING SHIT!!! I JUST GOOGLED WORDLE AND IT GAVE ME THE FUCKING ANSWER FOR TODAY’S PUZZLE. I DON’T WANT THIS FUCKING DOGSHIT AI BULLSHIT AND I DON’T WANT TO BE ROPED INTO MANDATORILY USING IT ANYMORE!!!