Iâm going to copy and paste my journal entry from last night.
Honestly feel somewhat traumatised.
I donât want to relive it. My heart rate increases whenever I think about it. I donât even want to write about it.
Iâll write it here and then not again.
I attempted to take a $1000 wig from a store.
They caught me. They noticed it was missing and at this point, I knew I was fucked. There wasnât any excuse I could give. The guy then asked to check my bag, and I started to panic, so I tried to say that my friend was outside and I had to leave, but at this point, it went from 0 to 60 real quick - (and my memory is patchy which frankly Iâm grateful for) they grab me and my bag as fast as lightning and they try to wrestle it out of my hands, swearing in my face and saying theyâre going to call the police, as I try to hold on to it and run, eventually the bag breaks and I pull it away and I run out the store. My hand is bleeding. I jog down the street, not sprint, as to not draw extra attention. I go down a side street, onto another street, and then into a random building and into the basement.
No one is in the basement. I attempt to empty a garbage bin so that I can hide in it - I was hiding from the cops at this point. The bin was too full so instead I crouch in a corner for about 45 minutes.
I lost my fucking <bus card>, by the way. I was concerned that they have it and that they can find me, but I checked and itâs not linked to my account so I doubt it.
I am frequently checking the <local police> page to see if they post me on there. Iâm thinking they probably wonât, but itâs a possibility and I need to be prepared.
Iâm afraid of what Iâll wake up to tomorrow.
Iâm afraid of having nightmares and having to relive it. Maybe I can try to stay up. I donât know.
I feel somewhat pathetic for having this reaction to the event.â
I didnât get the wig, by the way. Which frankly Iâm salty about lol.
Iâm not really sure what to do from here. Iâm still keeping an eye out to see if my face is posted online. Reason tells me I should stop lifting all together, but another part of me says whatever, Iâll just wait a bit, and then resume but only with less valuable things. I donât know.
Does anyone have any tips or advice for me on what might happen from here or what I should do to stay safe?