A dangerous mission where saying I love you goes wrong
“Time was always a measurement of this relationship and we’ve finally run out.”
The words hit you like a ton of bricks, each syllable weighing heavily on your chest as the impact of Guren’s words suffocated you. Squeezing every muscle and nerve in your body till it felt like you were going to burn up.
“R-Ran out?” You whispered weakly, your vision blurring and your hands beginning to tremble as you clenched desperately at his shirt, “What do you mean we ran out, Guren? I-I don’t… I don’t understand.”
“(Y/N), you need to grab everyone and run, I don’t want you getting caught up in the crossfire, let alone dying with me. You got that?”
“Dying with you?! Guren! What’s going on! Please, please just tell me. We’ll fix it, I’ll help you. Please let’s just talk—“
“No.”
“But I—“
“I said no, (y/n). That’s final. Take everyone and get the hell out of here, that’s an order, Sergeant. Leave me to die and save our squads.”
You watched in stunned silence as your superior grabbed for the pills in his pocket, placing another tablet upon his tongue. You knew it was his fourth tablet and would ultimately be his demise if he swallowed it.
“Stop it,” you mumbled weakly, moving to knock the container out of his hand and swat the pill off his tongue, your voice raising out of an angry panic with each step towards the tall men, “Stop it! Are you fucking stupid, Lieutenant?! That’s your fourth pill of the day! You’re barely alive after taking two. Just... Stop. Let’s figure this out together. Nobody has to die, Guren!”
“I already thought it out, (Y/n)! One of us isn’t going to make it! I’m not letting any more of my good men die.”
“What the fuck is even going on!” You screamed, your body on fire as it finally reached its limit. You were scared, anxious, pissed, and desperate. So utterly desperate to keep the man you loved safe and from dying, “Just tell me, Guren! What is happening?!”
“Shikama... he’s.. he’s coming to kill us all, but I can control the seraphs at the very least! I can use the keys against him to save everyone. It’s going to kill me, but if I don’t stop him, he’s going to kill every last living and dead person just for his sick fucking games.”
“Then let me come with you!”
“No!”
“Why not?!”
“Are you fucking stupid?! Because it’s a suicide mission!”
“I... Guren! I love you! You stupid fucking idiot! I love you, I love you so much I want to die with you. I don’t... I don’t want to do this without you...” your voice trailed off into a broken whimper, tears danced gently down you cheeks and your tight, rigid body began to tremble.
How could one person who had been so smart, been so skillful, and had managed to stay alive this long be this stupid? How could he even fathom dying when he still couldn’t be honest with his best friend? How could he just leave behind so much for the sake of being selfless?
“Why can’t you just be selfish for once. Why can’t you just want to live for once in your stupid life.”
“What are you talking about?”
“I see the way you throw yourself into battle, how you separate from us every time to fight on your own. You want to die. You’d rather something or someone kill you before you ever had to tell Shinya about what happened. You’re so fucking full of guilt you’d really rather get yourself killed than right your wrongs, Ichinose!? How fucking pathetic! I have wasted my last few years with you trying to save you because I don’t want you to die and this if how you repay me?”
Your voice raising higher and higher, tears threatening to spill, your fist clenched in anger, “All the nights I fucked you! Held you! Kissed you! And this is how you say thanks?! By getting yourself killed instead of being there to do it again?! Who... How... Why?! Why is it when you get one stupid good thing in your life, you try to ruin it by almost killing yourself?!”
Guren scoffed in pure disgust, a sick smile threatening to take over, “I don’t know what got into your head that any of that meant anything to me, but you’re wrong. This, ‘thing’ we had going on, it was nothing more than simple fun. Something to pass the time between our next battles. Did you really thing anything would come of this?!” The man laughed, shaking his head and grabbing the hilt of his blade, “We either live or we die in this fucked up world. Falling in love in the last thing I need.”
Every word, every syllable, the lack of any emotion in his face, it hit you so hard you thought you’d die from the emotional pain. Could you die from heart break? If not, this was cruel God’s way of bringing you to the brink of death. Pure torture.
You inhaled deeply, forcing the air out in a sigh. You grabbed the few things around your person, tilting your head up to meet Guren’s eyes, your voice dripping with pure venom, “Fuck you, Guren. Go get yourself killed. I’ll see you in Hell.”
“Mm...” the archon hummed, his hands resting on your hips, squeezing the flesh firmly to keep you steady as your hips still bucked and tensed from your last orgasm. “Satisfied?” He whispered, nipping your earlobe to catch your attention.
Nodding lazily and dropping your head to rest against his shoulder. Zhongli hummed softly once again, leaning forward slightly to grab the pen and papers that had been ignored in their haste for your demands. Whatever contracts that so desperately needed Zhongli’s attention made you huff in defiance, you were clearly more important yet he wasn’t treating you as such. You moved to try to slip out of his grasp, but a hand instantly flew off the paper to your lower back, pressing your chest and stomach firmly against his own.
“I didn’t say you could leave.”
“But, you... You’re busy and those dumb contracts need your attention more.”
“Our time isn’t up, regardless, I wouldn’t let you leave even if it was,” to emphasize his point, Zhongli pressed his fingertips into your skin, an almost bruising grip, “Stay.”
“Okay,” was all you could muster, relaxing as best as you could against the archon, the feeling of the mixture of your cums dripping down your thighs and pooling on Zhongli’s lap was uncomfortable in the most perverted way. It was sticky and still warm, it caused you to squirm a bit in his lap. Zhongli’s cock still inside of you twitching at the slight sensation. Lips parting in silent moans while your hips grounded down against the cock growing hard once more inside you, “Pay attention to me.”
“Naughty little thing, have you forgotten your place amongst Gods? Be patient and sit still.”
Zhongli has a lot to say to Kaeya before dinner. Short oneshot
Kaeya sat quietly, arms crossed over his body in a relaxed way, admiring the sceneries of Liyue Harbor as he and his counterpart, Zhongli, sat down at one of the outdoor tables by Zhongli’s favorite restaurant.
It was quiet between them, they had just been enjoying idle chatter before mutually agreeing to save any important discussion till after dinner. However, Zhongli was impatient, and a bit curious to see the captains response.
“Kaeya..”
“Hmm?”
“You know, all these years we’ve spent together, one could say we were dating and I do not mind those rumors nor would I dismiss it as false.”
Kaeya’s head snapped towards Zhongli, eyes wide and his body tensing for a moment, the words settling over Kaeya before he spoke, “W-What?!”
“It’s just, I hear so many rumors everyday, and each rumor always happens to fall on your consistent arrival in Liyue. People can tell you’re not from here, but they’re even more curious as to why we’re always together. And, as I mentioned before, I don’t mind the rumors they believe to be true... because I’d like if they were true.”
“I-,” The blue haired man cleared his throat, his cheeks shinning a bright red, “I- I didn’t know you felt so strongly about me, Zhongli. I’d be a fool to dismiss you and not see it through.”
The archon nodded his head slowly, his brows furrowing in a deep thought, “Then it’s settled. You’re my partner, or, I hear men like you would be called my boyfriend.”
The captain laughed heartily at the ridiculousness of Zhongli’s boldness, but also his pure heartedness. “Mmmhmm, I’d be considered you’re boyfriend, although, I prefer being called your partner. Boyfriend has a certain… Childish nature to it.”
“Are you afraid of being considered a child around me?”
“Well, the age difference doesn’t help with that, now does it?” Kaeya tilted his head, raising his visible brow upwards as a large smile braced his brims.
“You’re beautiful, Kaeya… More beautiful than anything that has come to grace my eyes in all my years alive.”
Diluc and Aether enjoy boba and each other’s company. Short oneshot.
“Can I have a sip of yours,” Aether pouted upwards at Diluc. They had gotten different flavors, Aether enjoying his taro tea while Diluc settled for black milk tea. The red haired man gave a fake sigh of annoyance and handed his cup over to the younger man. Aether greedily took it, taking a few small sips, humming at the bitter and sweet taste, lazily saying, “It reminds me of you.”
Diluc cocked a brow, but said nothing. However his expression was filled with curiosity and humor. Aether tilted his head towards the sky, scrunching his brows in thought, “Well, whenever we kiss, you taste nice, but it’s also like... bitter... from all the wine you taste.”
“What about when I’m not testing them?”
“I guess just sweet? I can’t really remember...”
Diluc stepped in closer, two fingers pressed under Aether’s chin to keep him still. Pink brims descending upon softer pink brims, it was a chaste kiss, but it wasn’t enough for Aether. He made a small whine in his throat, wrapping an arm around Diluc’s middle, tilting his head to deepen the kiss. Diluc happily obliged, running his tongue along Aether’s bottom lip until he submitted. Wet muscles kneading against each other, saliva coating each other’s tongue making it slick in their mouths, large hands grasping the smaller’s man’s hips until their lips were forced apart by the silly need to breathe.
Strings of spit connecting their lips, both men panting softly, Diluc’s dark amber eyes stared into soft golden hues, “Well?”
“L-like honey and tea. You’re deliciously sweet, Diluc.”
Sorry I haven’t been around much to post more fanfics! Been going through a lot emotionally and physically. I’ve had to deal with a toxic and abusive friendship, along with really bad anxiety and depression causing me to drop out of college for the time being, but I’m hoping to have a Xiao fanfic coming within the month! I really want to get back into writing so hopefully this fanfic will spark that again 🥺🖤 I’m so sorry for not doing any requests at the moment, but I promise to get to them soon!
Summary: Xiao see’s that you’re hurt and takes the time to reassure you and tease you.
Word count: 1,285
Xiao Lemon
You breathed in, a large smile gracing your lips, fingers gripping the ceramic plate that held almond tofu. You were just outside the entrance to the top level of the Wangshuu Inn, excited to see the adepti that guarded the premises. The two of you had grown very close in a short amount of time, you would come bearing food and would sit down together, Xiao would happily eat, listening to you ramble on about your adventures and the things you had done while in Liyue. Although he would never say it outloud, your visits to him was one of the many happiness he indulged in the mortal world, but you’d never know this. Instead, he would listen quietly, making comments here and there, watching the sun set in and the stars start to make their appearance. It was utter bliss between you two.
“Xiaoooo,” you sang out, walking towards the slender man who turned to face you at the sound of your voice. You offered him the simple dish, taking your usual spot beside him, your legs swinging off the ledge, “Goddness, the hilichurls were awful today. They kept kicking my ass…”
Xiao hummed, the sound coming out soft and apologetic. Chopsticks bringing the firm tofu to his mouth, greedily gulping it down. You laid back, eyes focused on the dimming sky above you both, “It’s kinda been a good day, I haven’t done much, just a lot of running around and gathering materials for my sword. Damn thing needs so many lustrous stone.”
“You have the Serpent Spine, don’t you?”
You nodded at the comment, “Mmm, yeah, but I was able to ascend it to tier three.”
“That’s becoming a good weapon, treat it kindly.”
You smiled, Xiao had a sweet habit of personifying objects, “Of course, I’m giving her a break for the day. She needs a good cleaning too, I’ll do that before I sleep.”
Xiao, who had just finished his food set his plate aside, leaning back on his hands and studying your face.
Your eyes met and you gave the mermaid-ish man a bright smile, “Hey you.”
“Hello.”
“Anyone come to visit you?”
He let out a puff go air through his nostrils, “You know nobody does. Only a few even know I exist.”
“It never hurts to ask, ya know? Maybe someone will, I don’t wanna miss out on hearing about that” You countered, reaching a hand out to lightly trace your fingers over the green iridescent tattoos that decorated the beautiful man. He shivered slightly under your feathery touch, but didn’t move further from you. He trusted you, something that hadn’t come easy and had taken you both months to come to an understanding, but he was grateful for the trust and patience you had given him.
“I know,” Xiao almost whispered, “I wouldn’t keep it from you. I can assure you.”
You hummed in delight, turning your head a little to the side, the last of evening sun slowly disappearing. You were content, these were your moments of happiness. You honestly couldn’t remember what you use to do before Xiao appeared in your life, perhaps you just would trudge into some inn or tent and pass out from pure exhaustion. Sometimes you would walk all night, your legs burning and your lungs gasping for air after scaling mountains and almost dyi-
“What’s that?”
Xiao’s voice brought you out of your thoughts, you turned to gaze at him, expecting to meet a soft expression, but what you got was a cold stare. Xiao was starring at you as if you were a stranger to him and it sent a chill down your spine.
“W-What? What’s what?”
His eyes narrowed, reaching out with a hand and cupping your cheek. It kept you still despite how nervous you felt. This went way beyond the bounds Xiao was comfortable with, and you didn’t understand what was going on with him. His gaze was cold, his thumb stroking a small patch of your skin before he carefully pressed down, causing you to hiss out in pain.
“You’re hurt. What happened?” His voice was growing colder and more demanding.
“It’s nothing, Xiao.”
He clicked his tongue, scolding you firmly with the simple sound, “If it was nothing, then why does it go further down?” To prove his point Xiao trailed two fingers along the bruise, tracing the pulse point on your throat down to your visible collarbone. You thought he’d stop, spare you some dignity, but he didn’t. He pulled the top of your shirt downwards, almost exposing your nipples to him, nevertheless he exposed the large and dark bruise.
“Xiao,” you breathed softly, unsure what to say or even do, you’d be lying if you didn’t have countless nights dreaming about Xiao caressing and fucking you. He was attractive and a refreshing pleasure in your exhausting life, it manifested into feelings of admiration and almost love. To have his hands on you now, so close to your nipples that ached for his touch was overwhelming to say the least, “There’s this one hilichurl… Kinda looks like a giant rock creature… Someone needed help, they kept asking for me to save them, but I couldn’t beat him… I couldn’t save someone, they were stuck and I couldn’t kill the hilichurl. He got me too many times so I had to retreat.”
Xiao let go of your shirt, letting it fall haphazardly back on your skin. One of his hands coming to rest just above your head, he rested his weight on that hand and leaned forward. Your noses almost touching, his cold amber eyes bore into yours, “I told you to call me if you needed help.”
“I… I thought you were just saying that.”
“I meant it. I’m here to protect you. All of you.”
“But how can I call for you?”
“Say my name.”
Eyes widening, your cheeks flushing a bright red, “W-What?”
“Say my name, (y/n).”
“Xiao…” your voice came out breathy, shaky, and in a desperate whimper.
His golden eyes flickered down to watch your lips momentarily, a teasing smirk gracing his own brims at the sheer neediness in your voice, “I meant just generally. Say my name and I’ll hear it. I always do. Always.”
You stared flabbergasted and embarrassed. You wanted to run, to scream, to hide, but you were still trapped beneath Xiao, and then it dawned on you… He can hear his name anywhere?
“Oh…”
He hummed, smiling widely, showing off the sharp fangs in his mouth, “Yeah… Oh.”
“Why didn’t you tell me beforehand that you can hear that?!”
“I didn’t expect you to need my help, let alone moan it.”
“Xiao!?” You screeched, your cheeks an unearthly shade of red, bringing your hands to your face to hide your blush but you were stopped when Xiao grasped your wrists in his free hand
“I’m always here to help, (y/n).”
“…okay…”
“Now, about that hilichurl, don’t worry. If you remember where you left him, I’ll handle it.” You nodded quietly, still stuck under Xiao’s gaze and grip, so he continued, “Let’s get you to QiQi, okay? I’m sure the zombie can heal you up.”
Xiao pulled back, dropping your wrist from his grip. He stood easily and offered a hand to you which you graciously took. As you helped yourself up, mumbling, “I’m sorry, Xiao.”
“Whatever for?”
“Doing... that....”
He hummed, tapped a finger to his chin in an fake thought, “I’m not sorry for listening and watching you. Let’s go now.”
“What?! What do you mean watching me?! XIAO?!”
But Xiao had already sprinted inside, heading down the stairs and motioning you to follow him, all while you stared, mortified.
An Archive of Our Own, a project of the
Organization for Transformative Works
Summary: you come home exhausted after work, just wanting to go to bed and Guren follows.
Word Count: 571
Naps with Guren
You trudged through the front door, discarding your work shoes and placing your word bag on the island in your kitchen. A heavy sigh left your lips and you stared aimlessly at your bag for a moment. You were exhausted. It had been a nightmare at work, people constantly needing your attention, a shit ton of paper work, and the everyday annoyance, on top of all that, you slept like shit last night. Guren had been out on a simple scouting mission, but he hadn’t gotten home until you were getting up for work. His lack of presence in your bed made it one of the worst nights you had in awhile.
Exhaustion and frustration written into your features, you made your way towards the living room couch where Guren was laid up. Bending down and pressing a chaste kiss to his forehead, you muttered, “I’m going to our room.”
And disappeared without a response or another word. Guren frowned at your odd behavior, normally you were a bit bubbly, albeit tired, but always excited to see him after work. What was going on with you tonight? He didn’t understand so he made his way to the bedroom to figure it out. You had already stripped your work clothes off, opting for just a shirt and underwear to lounge in. You were curled up in the blankets, yawning and rubbing your eyes. Guren leaned against the doorframe, watching you for a moment, he felt bad. He knew how bad you slept without him being there, but he could tell more things had happened to make you so tired and closed off.
“You okay?” Guren mumbled, sliding himself under the covers and wrapping his arms around you, pulling you flush against his warm, muscular body.
“Bad day at work, and I slept like shit.” You pouted, adjusting yourself until you had your head pressed to his chest, your arms wrapped around his middle and your eyes closed, “I thought maybe a nap before I made dinner would help.”
“Ah,” he hummed, his large hand stroking the back of your head, keeping you pressed to him, “I’ll cook tonight.”
“You sure?”
“Yeah, you look worn out. Let me take care of it.”
“Okay,” sighing in content, the gentle touch and the warmth of Guren was slowly lulling you to sleep. You made a soft noise of pure bliss, gently rubbing your cheek onto his chest like a cat, “If you’re sure, honey.”
“I am, sweetheart. Sleep for a bit, I’ll wake you when dinner is ready.”
“Stay with me a bit?” You pleaded, grasping at his shirt tightly so he couldn’t leave even if he wanted to despite Guren making no attempts to move away from you.
“Of course, idiot. Why would I leave you?” He questioned, tilting his head down and pressing a sweet kiss to the top of it, “You know I wouldn’t just up and leave.”
“I dunno, to make dinner?”
Guren clicked his tongue, scolding you playfully while he shook his head at you, poking your head, “It’s too early to start on it. Shut up and sleep.”
You hummed in response, finding the very act of talking to be all too difficult. He was so warm, your perfect little heater and he smelled so good. It was an intoxicating combination that had you knocked out in a matter of minutes.
Warm and cozy, you slept in his arms.
Notes: AHH sorry this is so short, just something I wrote for fun on Twitter!
A few days back on AO3 I found an unfinished, two chapter spideypool fanfic that was cute and had lots of potential and was also last updated two years ago. Two whole years! And it had only three comments, all of which on chapter one, none on chapter two. I enjoyed the fanfic, despite it being far, FAR from being finished and the chance of it ever updating again anytime soon was just about zero. So you know what I did?
I wrote a damn comment. On chapter two.
And I made sure that fucker was long and had a small theory of where I think the author would take the fanfic in the future. I let the person behind the fic know that I friggin LOVED the two chapters I got to read! That I would LOVE to see more! That I’d jump out of my skin in happiness and virtually hug them half to death if I saw that they updated it.
Let me remind you this fic wasn’t updated in two YEARS! I was the first to comment on it in a year. And the first to comment on chapter two! And you know what happened today?
I got a reply.
From the author of the fanfic.
And the author said how I gave them life for a project they had loved (still did) and that they were now working on a third chapter.
After two YEARS of not updating. Of not writing. And it makes me so friggin happy seeing what I did. What I caused.
With a single. Damn. Comment.
All that it took for me was to think a bit about what I wanted to tell the author and the comment it. All it took was one comment. And suddenly this person was inspired to continue a fanfic they had abandoned for TWO YEARS!!
I couldn’t be happier. I couldn’t be more proud.
Comment on people’s fanfics. No matter how few chapters there are. No matter how many years have passed since their last update. Comment. You like a fanfic? Comment on it. It’s that easy.
AHHHH this is the kind of stuff that really warms my heart, I love knowing I made people happy or emotional over my fics and I’m reallt grateful to my friends who I ket beta read parts of it and after Bc they give me such nice feedback, I always wanna keep writing to make them happy 😭😭😭😭😭
There were nights too often where you would wake up alone, with the cold night air being the only thing to greet you.
It could be said that dating a top pro hero would come with its hardships, that much you most certainly knew. However, in your head it had never accounted for the way you would spend countless hours awaiting the return of your boyfriend - the one you’ve come to depend on when it comes to getting a good nights sleep.
The presence that Keigo possessed was one incomparable to anyone else you had ever met, the warmth he emitted pairing with that almost too perfectly. Another major factor that added to that would be the quirk that he has, something that had made him become someone you were drawn to even more. The deep red hue of is wings constantly had you captivated, so much so that you find yourself staring at them more often than you’d ever admit to him.
You were able to tell a lot about how he has feeling with his wings, always able to catch him out if he tries to hide something from you and lessen any kind of burden. When he’s tired or upset, they would droop down - almost enough to where the feathers reaching just above his feet would drag across the floor. If he’s feeling more lively however, say in a more playful mood, they perk up.
The way you could perceive him from only the feathers on his back was beyond endearing to you, finding enjoyment in testing the reactions of them whenever the two of you have down time together. When it comes down to it though, there is one thing that you enjoy the most about Keigo and his wings - something kept for when he returns home to you in the nights of late patrols.
wanrings: noncon, dubcon, somnophilia, fingering, cumplay, picture taken without consent.
•Dabi coming to your room to ask for something but finding you spread out on your bed, lightly snoring and rubbing your thighs together.
He stops dead in his tracks, coming in and closing the door before sitting down on your chair. Your dream hazed body moves on its own, cuddling the pillow between your legs as you slowly rock against it. You're only in your panties and a shirt and he can clearly make out the wet patch forming on your underwear as you hump away.
He reckons that there's no harm if he indulges himself for a bit, already rubbing at the straining bulge in his pants.
Your mewls bless his ears, short breathes leaving your lightly parted lips as you clutch the pillow just right,
What you don't know can't hurt you right? With that though he carefully undoes his zipper, careful not to make too much noise. He pulls the chair closer before pulling his stiff cock out.
It's already leaking, hot and heavy when he wraps his fingers around it. He's pumping slowly, biting his scarred lip to stop any moans from leaving his mouth.
Your small hand reaches between your legs instead, kneading at your clothed clit in an effort to ease the tension.
His fist speeds up, the clacking sound of skin on skin filling the room as his eyes stay glued on you.
Poor thing, can't get herself off...what gentleman would he be if he left you struggling like this.
At least it's what he tells himself when he sits up.
The bed dips when he sits on it, his arm twitching as he thinks over everything for one final time.
His arousal wins, skilled fingers nudging yours away. He kicks his shoes off, moving the pillow from your body and sitting on his heels.
Your moaning when you feel the light friction over your clit, bucking into his hand on instinct.
His thumb dips into your panties, feeling up the wetness that pooled over your hole.
He wraps a hand around his member again, continuing where he left off as he plays with your pussy.
You're so adorable, spreading your legs for him. So slutty and needy, practically humping his hand.
Cold air hits your cunny, your underwear pushed aside as one long slender finger dips inside you.
His thumb finds your clit again, flicking in a circular motion as his index finger drags against your walls.
He has to grip the base of his cock to stop himself from getting too frantic, already hearing the bed creak under his ministrations.
He adds another digit in, watching your hips rock into his palm. Your pussy looks so good stretched out like that, almost hypnotizing as he stares at it, the wet sounds of his fingers plowing in and out of you rushing him close to the edge.
He moves even closer to you, stroking his cock next to his fingers, feeling your walls clench around his digits when he hears a moan surge from your throat.
You're so close, your dream feeling too good and too fucking real, making your nails dig into your own hand.
He can't make out what you're blabbering, a mix of curses and gasps.
His thumb speeds up on your nub, the tip of his dick lining up with your entrance all while he furiously strokes it, holding his breath and biting his tongue.
He can feel the hot blood surging through his veins, the grip on his cock tightening as white seed coat your pussy, his fingers never stop their work as cum seeps into your hole, pooling around his finger when you reach your high.
You close your legs in pleasure as he tries to pull his hand away, sucking him in and trapping his arm before your body relaxes again.
He finally pulls out, wiping his fingers on your sheets and tucking himself back in his pants. He slips your panties back in place, taking his phone out of his pocket.
He snaps a picture of your thighs smeared in his seed and your panties equally ruined, sticky cum trapped under the cloth, the material completely soggy and defiled.
YOUR GUREN FICS ARE AMAZING. HOW DO THEY NOT HAVE A MILLION NOTES. sorry for screaming in your inbox but omg I'm in love!! You're such an amazing writer!!! Just gonna go short circuit over them again omg. Anyways have an awesome day 😁😁😁
AHHH THANK YOU SO MUCH, THIS MEANS SO MUCH. 😭😭 I HAVE LOADS MORE OF GUREN, I JUST NEED TO GET AROUND TO POSTING THEM 👀
Content Warning: Child Abuse, descriptions of anxiety.
Read chapter 1 here.
The buzzing of the battlefield quieted down into nothing more than a simple humming, Shigaraki’s vision going a beautiful sparkling white until something slowly came into view. A young boy, with sky-blue locks, scabbed over skin, and red eyes sat silently on a small chair. The room around him was impeccably clean, almost entirely sterile which made the young boy shift uncomfortably. He was lost in thought, staring at the lines on the floor as though they were going to change before his eyes. Shigaraki never noticed the older gentleman stepping into the room, not until his unfamiliar voice broke the stillness and scared the boy momentarily,
“These are your mother’s hands...”
The dismembered and blue-tinged pair of hands were set down in front of a small Shigaraki. His maroon eyes gazing over them with curiosity and disgust. How could these be his mother’s hands? The hands that had once caressed and held him, the hands that were always a healthy flesh tone, and the hands that kept him safe were now crackled, leathery, and grey. How? How could this be hers?
“…your grandmother’s…
…your grandfather’s…
…and your father’s…”
Shigaraki stared at the family set, everyone was here… Mother, father, grandmother, grandfather… everyone. Everyone Shigaraki ever cared about laid out in front of him, except for one person.
Hana.
Where was Hana? Was she still alive? Is it possible she escaped unscathed? Had he kept his promise to protect her? If she was safe… Where was she? Had he not kept his promise? Did she not survive?! Where was Hana?!
“The human heart is an incredible thing,” the rough voice grumbled, almost enough to dull and distract from the screaming in Shigaraki’s head.
The anxiety was starting to stir more and more inside of Shigaraki, his chest heaving as he struggled to breathe, his throat constricting, trying to force any emotion or words he wanted to scream down. Bile rising into his throat, making his cheeks and eyes water. His family was dead. They had been dead for a while. Almost a month now, but why? Why were they dead? Who killed them? Who would do such a fucked up thing to such a small child?
“Left alone, it will heal itself of rage, grief, and all those negative emotions. But I always want you to keep them close to you… so that those feelings never fade.”
Never fade?! How could someone expect him to deal with all of these feelings? The pain he felt in his heart infected each part of his being. Each nerve, each muscle, each cell, every inch of his skin was bursting with anxiety and hatred. How could one little child carry such a heavy burden? How could anyone force Shigaraki to feel this tumultuous pain every day? Didn’t they know every waking moment felt like he was suffocating? Didn’t they know every day he woke up and vomited because he was so disgusted with himself for surviving? Didn’t they know how he stayed up for nights on end, crying because it should have been him who died? Didn’t they know how many times Shigaraki held his fingers to his throat, scared to press all five down despite wanting to die? Didn’t they know he cried for them? Didn’t they know how lonely he was? Didn’t they know how much he was suffering?
The voice and the image gradually began to fade away. The twenty-year-old Shigaraki blinked away the image of his young self sobbing and grasping his mother’s hands, but his sight never returned back to Rikiya, instead another memory took its place. This time, the image of a small black-haired child with pale skin came into view. The present Shigaraki squinted against the image, uncertain of who it was he was looking at…
Could… Could it really be…??
Hana!
Her cherubic features were always such a delight for Shigaraki to look at, it stirred up feelings of possessiveness and protection for his sister. Hana stood before Shigaraki, her pigtails bouncing slightly as she tilted her head and watched her brother who was silently sobbing, “You got in trouble again, right? Sheesh… You shoulda just kept quiet, Ten.”
Hana leaned in and Shigaraki felt a gentle pressure on his hand when she grasped at it, “You should do like I do. I’m telling Daddy that I wanna be a bride someday! It’ll make him real happy, especially if I marry someone like Daddy or you, Ten!”
Shigaraki smiled widely at the sweet words of his sister. Hana marrying a cry baby like him? He couldn’t do anything to keep her safe and happy, how could a husband like him do the same? Shigaraki sighed, despite his need and want to protect the child in front of him, she was his older sister and always was the one to take care of him.
The realization tasted sour in his mouth, but it was his sad reality. Whenever Shigaraki would run off to cry, she’d always come and find him. Always taunting and teasing the younger boy, but always grabbing his hand to pull Shigaraki along with her. It was Hana who would calm him and wipe the tears that stained his reddened cheeks. It was only Hana who could calm him down with just a few innocent, childlike words, and a toothy grin.
The tightening grip on the present Shigaraki’s wounded hand brought the man back to his current reality. The pulsating pain was enough to force out a scream, burning Shigaraki’s throat as it tore apart his vocal cords. Clawing its way out, but he could barely hear his screaming.
His thoughts, his head. Everything, it was all spinning. It was all spinning, round and round and round and round and round and round and round! These fucking memories! These stupid, memories! Why?! Why?! Why?! Why are these fucking memories suddenly coming back now?!
Rikiya sniggered, “All I see is just a hollow man… You’re just a man who indulges in destruction, right?! And in that case, you will never measure up to me!”
The incomprehensible frustration that sank deep deep down into Shigaraki’s heart. And the missing memories, slotting right into place! Feelings go hand in hand with experience! That’s right! There was more to Shigaraki than even he himself knew, there was something deep inside of him just waiting to explode, to be free and take charge. Something that Shigaraki desperately wanted to let out after all these years.
The blue-white haired man pressed his three remaining fingers against Rikiya’s thumb, the skin instantly starting to crumble beneath Shigaraki’s quirk. Flesh turning into nothing more than grey colored pieces of paper, floating off around the point the two villains were joined. Rikiya seemed to notice fairly quickly, the loss of feeling happening almost instantly, he knew he couldn’t let Shigaraki continue with his decay or it would be much worse. The older man pulled his arm slightly back before flinging Shigaraki’s body across the battlefield as though he was nothing more than a rag doll.
Rikiya was sure that Shigaraki’s quirk couldn’t have activated with only three fingers. All the data, all the experience beforehand showed he could only activate it with all five fingers? What had changed? Why now? What happened in the few seconds that Shigaraki looked lost?
A faint sound of skin scratching, labored breathing, and wheezing laughter forced Rikiya’s focus towards it. The sight before him was stunning. Shigaraki sat scratching at his bleeding and ripped skin, his eyes almost bulging from his eye sockets. His maroon eyes dark and bloodshot, yet still looked hungry for more power.
“MY HEADS SPLITTING.” The loud rasp rang from the scream abused throat, blood dripping down his chin, a sick smile etched into his wrinkled skin.
God itself would shiver at the very sight of Shigaraki right now. It was violent. It was sick. It was tortured. It was demented. It was repulsive.
While Rikiya stared at the revolting image before him, all Shigaraki could see was a beautiful and kind woman.
His mother.
An angel.
A goddess.
Her beautiful voice soothing the rage laced heart that ached inside a battle-worn Shigaraki, his mother rubbing the cheek of the young boy, “You’ve rubbed your eyes all ragged. Let’s get you some drops. It’ll only get itchier if you keep scratching.”
Shigaraki enjoyed the blissful image of his mother, her soothing words and movements could have made the man sigh in utter bliss had he been alone. Rikiya on the other hand was studying the worn-down man, trying to figure out what exactly had awoken inside of Shigaraki. He knew under the right circumstances that meta abilities could evolve, the right amount of stress was essential for pushing the abilities to new heights, but had that happen so suddenly with Shigaraki? Could meta abilities evolve that quickly? And could the user instinctually know how to use the evolved quirk right away? Was this man finally in the process of awakening? Had Rikiya unknowingly helped Shigaraki and aided in his own demise? There were so many questions, such little time, but such intriguing discoveries.
Shigaraki’s raw physicality, his raw movements, and almost immature demeanor clued Rikiya in about something. Shigaraki had trained his body hard. Despite his slender frame, the man was hardened with lean muscles, allowing for quick and targeted movements. He wasn’t bulky like All Might, Shigaraki’s quirk needed stealth and agility to pull off successfully, but his technique, was something otherworldly. Something only picked up during life or death training.
This kid… He was….
Incredible.
“I… I have also honed my stress ability, so I understand,” Rikiya started, his eyes trying to focus on Shigaraki, “I was wrong to judge you as beneath me. The fact that you haven’t vanished after taking so much damage tells me that you’re no double! Far from it in fact. You are simply incredible, Tomura Shigaraki.”
Shigaraki looked like a real-life zombie, his gaze was far away, his body moved slowly and only in one simple direction. He was predictable and open for attack. Somehow, Shigaraki’s movements fastened as he grew closer to Rikiya. Long limbs moving like a sleek cat to strike at its prey. Muscular limbs being stretched and exerted to their max all for the goal of beating Rikiya.
Shigaraki pulled his arm back, gripping the limb with his free hand to keep it steady, he shot towards Rikiya faster than the older man expected, but it still wasn’t fast enough. Rikiya’s shirt tore apart violently, buttons flying in every direction as the man’s body began to harden. He was being engulfed more and more as the stress he had stored up over the years began to leak out, he was going to give Shigaraki the respect he deserved, at an 80% stress output.
“No more games, Shigaraki! It’s time for you to die!”
Rikiya’s face looked just as grotesque as Shigaraki’s, the skin-like suit was bright red and almost splitting from the sheer amount of power it held. The suit of the power leaking out to surround his face, dripping and smearing like blood. Rikiya grinned childishly beneath it. It was his turn to feel giddy, to feel youthful. Such an incredible fight with an incredible opponent warranted for it.
Shigaraki dashed forward, as did Rikiya’s, channeling all of his power into his arm and hand in a similar manner to Midoriya’s One For All. The sheer wind force coming off of Rikiya’s arms hit Shigaraki like a freight train. Shigaraki’s breath was knocked from his lungs, his body flung through the air, and he was slammed into large pieces of flying debris. Shigaraki felt like he was in a battering ring, his body scraped and bleeding, he knew a few ribs had broken, and at least one lung was punctured, but he didn’t care. How could he care when he saw none of it, the trace-like state Shigaraki was still in was enough to lick away any pain that he felt.
Shigaraki could only see his grandfather, a kind-looking man, his voice softer than most men, but it was comforting to a young Shigaraki, “Here, Tenko! It’s your favorite— Ohagi! Eating yummy things helps make the sadness go away. Why not take a few bites, son?”
Why had Shigaraki been sad when he had his grandparents? Especially his beautiful grandmother. She always took such good care of him, her voice almost as angelic as his mother’s, but not quite there, “Don’t cry, Tenko, or you’ll make grandma cry too.”
His grandmother and grandfather were always so kind to him, so why was he always so sad? Why did every part of him hurt? Why did he always feel alone? Why did they all have to die?
He had the answers, he knew why he was hurting and just what he needed. Back then, what Shigaraki needed to hear the most from them wasn’t that he’d be okay or that the sadness would go away, no.
What he needed them to tell him was….
Rikiya stood, watching the battered and bruised villain struggle to get on his feet. His breathing hard and loud as he struggled to suck in air with a punctured lung. Rikiya watched, someone from the sidelines shouted into the earpiece Rikiya wore, “Re-Destro!! Be on your guard! He’s headed right for you!! They had a real monster lying in wait!! Re-Destro! They didn’t play all of their cards!!”
What?!
Didn’t play ALL their cards?!
What else could these sick bastards be keeping up their sleeve?!
“SHIT!” Rikiya yelled, the deep rumbling he had been hearing wasn’t the consequence of his own power destroying the buildings and ground around them, no, it was something else. Something or someone was coming straight at them!
The booming sound of heavy footsteps descended upon the battlefield, Rikiya flinched at the deafening noise. A loud, human-like scream broke above the clouds, a ginormous rock-like body came crashing through several buildings causing them to come tumbling down with a loud groan. This gigantic monster came barreling through the buildings all for the sake of its master, Tomura Shigaraki.
Rikiya watched it, wide-eyed and struck with fear. Now it was Shigaraki’s turn to watch the other villain, his body somewhat hunched over, tired and exhausted from the fight and his eyes retained a certain sadness.
Rikiya gawked at Shigaraki in terror. Rikiya had been hounding his ability since he was a child, trying to create a move that was so destructive it was untouchable, yet somehow, Shigaraki had managed to touch Rikiya enough to activate his quirk. Small pieces of Rikiya’s skin was flaking away, floating off into the air, leaving the beginning of an open wound. Shigaraki was no normal villain, in the instant Rikiya aimed to destroy, Shigaraki had moved into it rather than defend like human nature would dictate, it would seem Shigaraki only moved to destroy.
“Re-Destro! Be on your guard, dammit!”
The saddened, but exhausted man was once more lost in the tidal wave of memories that were unlocking. It stirred up new feelings, new desires, new thinking. What was his purpose in life? .What was Shigaraki seeking to build, Why did it feel like only yesterday was his memories reemerging? What was happening to him?
Shigaraki stared blankly at his hand that was damaged, yet somehow looked perfectly fine and normal, “What do I seek to build…? No, you’re totally right. All I can do is destroy!” A sick smile graced bloodied and crackled lips, his white hair wind-whipped, his body standing taller and prouder, his exhaustion replaced with adrenaline.
Rikiya glared sharply, disgust evident in his features, his power began to consume him, covering him in their protection, “Then be gone! A world without creation has no future!” Rikiya grew bigger and bigger, his quirk gracing him with enough power to be 15 feet tall, his chest gigantic, and his hands held fistfuls of his pure raw power.
Shigaraki chuckled, loving the fact he had pushed this seemingly coolheaded villain to his brink, “No future, huh? Nah, I don’t want that either.”
What was it that Shigaraki wanted? What were his true intentions? Another memory hit Shigaraki like a strong wave, a quiet but clean home came into his view and he heard a familiar voice, “Thank you for being so understanding. I’m so sorry my boy bothered you. I’ll be sure to give him a talking-to!”
His mom?! Why was she apologizing? Why wasn’t she doting on him? What was going on?!
Shigaraki couldn’t remember why he was in trouble, he only remembered the way his father grabbed the back of his shirt. Roughly pulling the young boy through the house, his mother’s face warped in confusion and fear as she tried to catch a crying Shigaraki. His father’s strong voice booming above the sobbing screams, “Playing hero again?! Causing trouble?!”
“Stop! Kotaro! Don’t… Don’t be so hard on him! He’s just a kid, please!”
“If you don’t like it, then learn your lesson this time.” His father snarled.
“FATHER! NOOOO!” Shigaraki screamed, thrashing in his father’s grip while desperately trying to grab for his mother, “STOP IT!”
“KOTARO, PLEASE!” Tears flowed down his mother’s reddened cheeks, she was so beautiful when she cried, but it broke the young boy to see her crumble.
Now he could remember why his father was so angry with him.
Shigaraki’s father always had one rule in their house. Only one, but it was absolute. No talk about heroes.
Shigaraki now sat curled up, his knees tucked close to his chest, fresh and old tears staining his cheeks, his nails scratching his delicate skin over and over. His black hair was messy and stuck to his forehead from sweat. The gentle breeze of the outside world licked and caresses the wet points on his face, as though the world was trying to soothe this hurting boy. Kotaro watched the sobbing child from behind the glass door, a sneer etched into his face from his disgust
“You’d better not go and apologize to him for me.”
“But what about dinner? And his allergies are only getting worse!” His mother retorted back
“Rules are rules.”
“Don’t you think you’ve been too strict lately?” Shigaraki’s grandmother chimed in, her eyes watching his son-in-law curiously.
“Five years old and still no quirk. If I can’t make Tenko understand, it’ll only lead to more misery for him. Wanting to be a hero will cause him nothing but trouble. As my in-laws, I need you to understand too.”
But Shigaraki’s mother was too kind, too sweet, and too naive to allow her child to suffer in such a way. She sat behind her sweet baby boy, ointment in her hands to rub onto his worn-out skin, “Come on. No more scratching okay?”
“But I’m so itchy,” Shigaraki whimpered, the back of his hands rubbing the raw skin on his eyes
“It’s too bad we don’t know what’s causing these allergies…”
“It’s the house. I get itchy here.”
“Tenko,” She smiled, bandages and ointment applied, turning the small child towards her welcoming body, “Do you still want to be a hero?”
“Yup!” He smiled sweetly and innocently, “Because, like, nobody wanted to play with Mikkun and Tomo. So I said ‘Let’s play together!’ And we played heroes, and it was super fun! And then Mikkun said, ‘you should be All Might, Ten’ I was nice and played with them, even though, they don’t have any friends.” Shigaraki threw himself at his mother, wrapping his little arms around her waist and burying his face against her chest, comforting and calming him with her scent and soft body.
“Mommy, why does father say no all the time?! Does… Does he hate me?! Will he like me if I get my quirk?”
The older woman sighed, pressing a hand to the back of his head, keeping him pressed against her bosom, “Your father doesn’t hate you… He just… He knows… He knows how hard it is for heroes.”
How I wish those were the words I wanted to hear mother… I really wish I did, but little kids are sneakier than you’d expect and simpler. When you’re little, grown-up’s words are absolute. And that’s why I needed to hear it from you all. Just one thing but the household my father built rejected me kindly.
Notes: Hi! If you want to keep better track of this series and it’s progression, here is the A03 link!
