pompous autistic cadaver

♱ eli ♱ 26 ♱ they/them ♱ ♱ BA in english + american lit ♱ ♱ phd student at university of oregon ♱

[handful0fteeth]

ATTENTION

i have made an official fanfic blog!

@nastydogpublishingco @nastydogpublishingco @nastydogpublishingco

all my fics will henceforth be posted there!

i hope y’all will continue to support me over there ❤️

[cheesefags]

2-YEAR CHEDDAR

from GRAFTON VILLAGE

I usually try to review cheeses virginally - that is, ones that I’ve never had before. In this case, this is a cheddar I’ve had many times before. But I couldn’t leave it off the blog, what with its obvious appeal to leather and rubber fetishists.

As far as cheddars go, Grafton’s 2-year aged isn’t going to shock you. It’s mild, light on the salt, with a slightly sweet and grassy flavour. It’s got a nice texture. It’s dense, more moist than I expected, and smooth.

So what is the deal with the gummi suit on this cheese anyway? Well, cheese has obviously been around a lot longer than fridges. Fresh cheeses like mozzarella are too moist to last very long outside of a cold place (bacteria and fungi do so love damp places), though I don’t think anyone was too mad about eating that stuff quickly. But cheeses that have been aged (and dried) more have some more preservation options, which is where cheese wax comes in. The wax is a physical barrier, stopping fungal spores from landing, and also blocks moisture and air, making the cheese a pretty unfriendly place to grow. Even drier cheeses can be bandaged in cheesecloth and then slathered in lard to preserve them while allowing some ventilation.

I gotta admit: hot wax isn’t really my thing. But cheesecloth bondage and grease… it has potential.

[dumbpuppyfag]

this site used to be awesome

[lesspopped]

affirmation: I am capable of finishing the works of pornographic fanfiction I start writing

[innerchildabortionclinic]

the worst person you know thinks they're super empathetic. the kindest person you know thinks they're fucked up and evil

[goatedgreen]

i hate that when you try and look up shit for writing purposes it starts linking suicide hotlines and addiction advice articles like bro i just wanna know the information im not killing myself i promise. now tell me what i wanna know

[rhinco]

i love you semicolon. no one look at my 80 word sentence

[maryoliveoil]

[argumate]

I keep thinking this! very frustrating

[argumate]

fuck!

[cheerfullycatholic]

[pansyfemme]

if you squint you can see that the penis is actually quite phallic in nature

[furcoat]

[spn2006]

i bring a real "this piece of media has incest subtext that you're ignoring" vibe to the function that nobody really likes

[notlayingroses]

Everything I read about recovering from burnout is like “it takes months or even years to fully recover” and it’s like okay…. I have a weekend before I gotta clock in on Monday

[fagcrisis]

i hate the word spicy can we bring back calling things erotic

[maryoliveoil]

rolling up to Wendy's to get an erotic chicken sandwich

[persianmom-deactivated20260602]

hate that I was understanding when I should’ve just been a cunt

[vulpinesaint]

saying "question mark?" and "however comma," out loud are game changers. punctuation on the go. and it's always the funniest thing that anyone around you has ever heard

[fagcrisis]

i hate the word spicy can we bring back calling things erotic

[maryoliveoil]

rolling up to Wendy's to get an erotic chicken sandwich