letters.unsent

My undying love & affection for him

[haneefaa]

Accept your growth by allowing yourself time to be transformed. Everything doesn't happen overnight, so be patient with yourself.

[haneefaa]

Nightly...!!!

Every night I hope he's near,

so I hold my pillow, whisper it his name—

tell it about my day, mad as that sounds,

find peace in a story with no edges.

Madness, or eternal thread?

Will he ever know

how much of him lives in me

when he isn't even here?

[haneefaa]

Cold Night

It's a cold night.

Thinking about you feels like snow settling on bare skin;

beautiful,

weightless,

and cruel enough to make me shiver.

But every time I imagine us,

something soft catches fire inside me.

The idea of you and me

is the only warmth winter has failed to steal.

I keep wondering;

are you awake somewhere,

thinking of me the way I'm thinking of you?

Or has my name already become a stranger

to your thoughts?

Your smile lives in my memory

like a bonfire in the middle of a frozen field,

melting the parts of me

that had already accepted the cold.

And somehow,

without meaning to,

I've found myself missing you again—

a little deeper,

a little quieter,

a little more than yesterday.

~حنيفة

[haneefaa]

A Quiet Withdrawal:

I ceased to chase. He ceased to matter.

Not with grief - just gentle quiet.

I keep him better in my mind,

where he is kind,

and I am not waiting.

[haneefaa]

I am not empty; I am filled

with every thought of him.

He lives in every place I go,

in every room, every hymn.

I chose this love not out of need

but out of something true.

And in that choosing I found home,

a world made whole by you.

His voice, my quiet. His smile, my light.

Not burden but my bloom.

I carry him not as a wound

but as my sweetest room.

This is not longing. This is love,

chosen, complete, and mine.

Filled to the edges, beyond all words,

beyond all space and time.

💙

[haneefaa]

Chosen

Not the love that answers calls,

or shows up when you spell it out

I mean the kind that finds you first,

the one that chose you, without doubt.

Before the asking, before the need,

before you learned to beg or wait

that's the love worth holding out for,

not the kind that comes too late.

I'm not broken, just done performing

for hands that never reach my way.

Silence isn't emptiness anymore

it's where I learned I'm okay.

حنيفة~

[haneefaa]

Later?? Later the coffee gets cold.

But what if she likes Iced-Americano??

[heartbeatsallah]

‎Umar ibn Abdul Aziz رحمه الله said:

‎When you are troubled by something in this world, remember death, for it will make things easier for you

‎الفرج بعد الشدة لابن أبي الدنيا (ص42)

[haneefaa]

I will not say " I love you" but...

In mine undoing, 'tis thy shadow I embrace; for to lose thee were a sorrow deeper than death itself.

[haneefaa]

Today is Valentine’s Day…

I say I don’t believe in it. I say love doesn’t need a date.

But when your heart has chosen someone as 'home', it still waits… even if it pretends not to.

We’re not talking.

There’s silence where there used to be laughter.

But the moment I heard “Valentine,” it was his name that echoed inside me.

Not because I remembered him-

but because he never really leaves.

He lives in my thoughts like a permanent season.

People wait for one day to post, to confess, to show love.

But when you truly love someone, every ordinary day feels sacred.

Every sunrise is his.

Every night belongs to his memory.

It was 3 a.m.

The world was asleep.

I called him five times.

I knew he wouldn’t pick up.

I knew he was probably dreaming peacefully.

But still… I dialed.

Because sometimes love isn’t about being answered.

It’s about feeling connected.

And in those few seconds while the phone rang,

my heart felt closer to him.

As if the sound of the ring was travelling through the darkness,

finding him, touching him softly -

whispering, “She’s still here.”

Does he know I lose sleep thinking of him?

Does he know my nights are heavier when he’s distant?

Even if he never sees the missed calls,

even if he never asks why -

I know that for those few seconds,

my love reached his world.

Maybe not as my voice.

Maybe not as my name.

But as a vibration.

A signal.

A quiet proof that somewhere,

someone loves him so deeply

that even silence cannot stop her from trying.

Hopeless?

Maybe.

But when love is real,

hope never really dies.

~حَــنِــيــفَــة

[haneefaa]

“An Hour Ruled by Absence”

The day smiled upon me, till dusk betrayed it.

Then came a sudden stillness - unnamed, unbidden

a terror without a face.

My heart emptied itself,

and I became a vessel without feeling.

I longed to sit unmoving,

as though motion itself might shatter me.

Fear wrapped the world in darkness

Like a rain-drowned midnight

where no candle dares to burn,

and silence speaks louder than thunder.

In that hollow hour, one truth rose above the void:

I knew the cure to my breaking.

It was not light, nor words, nor time -

it was you!

Only you.

~ حَــنِــيــفَــة

[haneefaa]

Baat Jaan par aa bani,

Isse zyada kaise chah sakti thi usko

[haneefaa]

I care

He stays light

I speak in concern

He answers in silence or laughter

~ That mismatch is disturbing me- not him alone

"I am not in love, yet love hath laid his hand upon me"

حنیفہ

[haneefaa]

"Every time I try to express my feelings, he calls it an argument. But I’m not fighting — I’m just trying to be heard."

[haneefaa]

He knew I love him more than anything still he chose to break me

[vvhack]

[lovingechoes]

Gotta do it

[kaible-deactivated20181205]

I don’t care what news I get I just want this stupid potato dog on my dash

[vicepresidentgay]

do not underestimate how many times i can listen to a song in a row