"Are you sure? Because I was such a shitty person." Her voice cracked under the weight of her own guilt, every word sounding heavier than the last. “God, I even hit you, and you never deserved that. Not for a second.” She shook her head quickly, almost angrily at herself, tears threatening to spill as the memories came rushing back all at once. “I should have known better. I should’ve walked away, should’ve calmed down, should’ve been better than that, but I just… snapped. Toulouse was being such an idiot and everything felt like too much all at once and I let it get inside my head.”
Her fingers curled tightly into the fabric of her sleeves as she tried to steady her breathing. “That’s not an excuse though,” she whispered. “None of it is.”
She laughed weakly through the emotion building in her throat. “Still… I’m glad he saved you. I don’t even want to think about what could’ve happened if he hadn’t been there and—”
The words suddenly died in her mouth the moment she felt Rachel’s hands against her skin. The warmth of the touch caught her completely off guard, soft and grounding in a way she hadn’t expected. Her breath hitched sharply, and for a second she simply stood there frozen, overwhelmed by the kindness she felt she didn’t deserve.
The moment the hug wrapped around her, she broke. She held onto Rachel tightly, almost desperately, as if afraid she would disappear if she loosened her grip. Her shoulders trembled with quiet emotion while she buried her face against her.
“You’ve been an amazing friend,” she murmured shakily. “Better than I ever deserved after everything.” She swallowed hard before pulling back just enough to look at her, eyes red and glassy with tears. “And I’ll do better, I promise. I mean it this time. I’ll never allow myself to become that person again. I never want to hurt you, or anyone, the way I did before.”
Her voice softened into something smaller, more vulnerable. “I hate that I became someone who could make you afraid of me.” She shook her head slowly. “But I’m going to change that. Even if it takes me forever, I’ll keep trying until I’m someone worthy of the trust you still gave me.”